Grew up in Long Island, New York. My mother was a nurse, father was a cop. We weren’t rich, we weren’t poor, but
we had a whole bunch of fun. I didn’t go to a Division 1 school; I was
not recruited by a Division 1 school, so I ended up at a Division 3 school, which was
like a glorified high school, and thus didn’t think I was good enough. My freshman year, we were 6 and 3, first winning
season. My second year, we were undefeated. Third year, I was the first All-American,
and then my fourth year, I got drafted. I didn’t know God, but I just knew in my
heart I was going to play in the NFL, and that my life was going to mean something. I kept telling my coaches that. I had a coach mocking me behind my back, telling
other players I’ll never make it. I was too small, too slow, too short. But that just motivated me to keep working. My senior year, my coach made a flyer, put
my picture on it, my stats, and he sent it to every NFL team every week. And not one team came to see me play. But after the season, we got calls from about
five teams, and they came and watched the film, and the Los Angeles Rams said, “We’re
going to draft you. If in the late rounds you’re available and
we have everything we want, we’re going to draft you.” I said, “Don’t mess with me.” When I got to the NFL, I walked into a hotel
room with some guys on the team. I was a rookie, and it was one of those peer
pressure things, fitting in, and it was about six guys in the hotel room. I didn’t know what we were going in there
for, and they just pulled out cocaine. I was like, “Oh, man.” I saw everybody else doing it, and I said,
“Well, this can’t be that bad.” I knew it was wrong, and I knew it was dangerous,
but I lived on the edge. One day, my buddy took me to a crack house,
and I said, “I want to go watch the guy make crack.” So I went into this bathroom and I sat in
this little tiny bathroom, and there was this guy in there with a white tank top, shriveled
up, skinny. He was like a skeleton. And I remember looking at him going, “Man,
look at that pitiful guy. Drugs is killing him.” And then I looked in the mirror, and God said,
“What about you? He was in your seat not that long ago.” And my buddy opened up the door, and he gave
the crack to the drug dealer, my buddy, and my buddy stood this far away from me and smoked
crack, and I remember his eyes just kind of rolling back into his head. I thought he was going to die right in front
of me. He asked me did I want some, and I said no. He said, “You’re strong.” I said, “No, I’m scared. I’m not strong. I’m scared.” That was one of the wakeup calls for me, because
I went into the other room by myself, in this dark room, and did cocaine by myself, and
it’s like, “What am I doing? I’m in the NFL, I’m living my dream, and
I’m destroying it.” I would look at myself in the mirror and audibly
say, “Don’t put the powder in your nose.” I would say those words to myself in the mirror,
and then I would put the powder in my nose. To think that I couldn’t stop, you know,
“How far is this going to take me, and what is going to happen to me?” I got to a point where I realized that I was
throwing away the best opportunity I had, and I just woke up and said, “I can’t
do this anymore.” I just kept saying, “God, one more day. One more day, I want to party. There’s going to be that party, there’s
going to be that experience that’s going to make me fulfilled and make me happy,”
and every day, I was like “I’ve just got to hold out for that.” And it never came. And there were some guys on my team who shared
the Gospel with me. So April 12, 1984, 5:00 in the morning, I
had been up all night, and I said, “I’m done. I’m going to give God the commitment I’ve
given football, the commitment I’ve given drugs, the commitment I’ve given fun. I’m going to give God that commitment. I’m going to give my life to You today.” I had to come to a point where I had to make
a decision that I was going to be committed to doing the right thing and following Jesus,
and I did. Over time of going through ups and downs of
life, you come to learn that He is reliable. He’s 100% trustworthy.
