"Meet Little Ugly Jeff" | Controlled Chaos | JEFF DUNHAM

- Well peanut, it's about time to end the evening. - No, wait! - What? - I got one more thing to do. - No, the shows about over. - No, it's not! I got one more thing. - What? - Okay, look. Just trust me on this. I have a new hobby. - A new hobby? - Yes. - What is it? - I am now a ventriloquist, too. (crowd laughing) - No, you're not. - Yes, I am. (crowd laughing) - That was pretty good! - I know! Compared to me, you suck. (crowd laughing) - Really? - Let me show you how it's done. - Well, you need a dummy. - He's in the box. - Do you have a dummy? - (dummy) Over here, senor. (crowd laughing) - He's in the box? - Yep. Right next to Jose. - Can I get him out? - Yep, don't touch my stick. Careful! (crowd laughing) - What? - He's really ugly. (crowd laughing) - He is ugly, senor. He is nasty looking. (crowd laughing) He's so scary, I wet my stick. (crowd laughing) - But he's right here? - He's the only other guy in there. Check it out, look, look, look, look, look! - All right, let's see this. Here we go. (crowd cheering) I thought you said he was ugly. - He is! - He looks a little like me. - No, he looks a lot like you! - This isn't funny. - Then why is everyone else laughing? - I laugh too, senor. I laugh so hard I crack my stick. - Do you know how to work this? - Of course I do. - You know there's a little lever down there. - I know. - You grab onto the lever - I know! - And you pull on it. - I know! - Now do you have ahold of the lever? - He's got ahold of something. (crowd laughing) - See, I can do this, too! - Fantastic. - How are you, little ugly Jeff? - Not good. - Wait a minute. You're gonna call him ugly Jeff? - Oh no, no, no. Little, ugly Jeff. (crowd laughing) - Is there any other name? - Uh, little ugly ass Jeff? (crowd laughing) - I like that. - Me too, senor. - Thank you. - You're welcome. - Wait a minute. I would prefer you didn't use the word ass. - Oh, I didn't really. It's all one word. Little-ugly-ass-Jeff. - Ass Jeff, ass Jeff, I am ass Jeff. (crowd laughing) - See? It's good. Bravo! Gracious. De nada. - This is ridiculous. (crowd applauding) - So, how are you, little ugly ass Jeff? - I'm sad, handsome peanut. - Wait a minute. Handsome peanut? - Yes, peanut is very handsome, unlike you, ugly ass Jeff. - He is me. - Good point. - I hate my ugly ass self. - All right. - He said he was sad. - I heard him. - Why are you sad, ass Jeff? - Because I'm a loser. - Yeah, that is sad. - And he's ugly. And I'm ugly. - Thank you! It's okay. - Will you stop this? - That's a shame little ugly ass Jeff. - I have no idea how I made it this far in life. - Me neither. No one does. - I suck. - All right. - Maybe you could make up for your loserness by having a good personality? - No. - Doubtful. - No way. - I'm sorry. - Me too. - Okay, look. (crowd cheering) You guys really think this is funny? - Oh yeah. Si. - Definitely. - The truth hurts. - Okay. I tell you what, peanut, you think that's funny? I have something here that you're gonna like. - What? - Just trust me, you're gonna love this. (crowd cheering) - What the fuck is that? (crowd laughing) - Hi, look at me, I'm a little idiot (laughing obnoxiously) - That is not funny! - Yes it is. - No, it's not. - I think it is. - Me too. - L-O-L. - Shut up! - You guys have been awesome. Thank you, goodnight. (crowd cheering)

Channel: Jeff Dunham

Views: 12,445,457

Keywords: Jeff Dunham, Little, Jeff, Little Ugly Jeff, Peanut, Woozle, comedy, comic, stand-up, ventriloquist, ventriloquism, Dummy, Puppet, Jeff Dunham: Controlled Chaos (Film), Special, Funny, Very, Humor, Hilarious, achmed, all over the map, america's got talent, arguing with myself, bubba j, christmas special, controlled chaos, dvd, family, grump, jacques, jose, keel, laughing, marnell, melvin, merde, minding the monsters, movie, muslim, spark of insanity, sweet daddy d, trump, tv, unhinged in hollywood, walter

Id: jSCRP3WSkJ8

Length: 4min 42sec (282 seconds)

Published: Wed Nov 11 2015