Matt Gaetz is So Toxic, Even Trump Won’t Meet with Him

hi everyone i'm jimmy i'm the host of the show thanks for watching thank you for joining us on a very big day it is today was [Music] back to school day here in los angeles this is back to school week really uh parents have been waiting for this for almost a year our kids went back this morning we're so eager to drop them off i'm honestly not sure if it was their school it was us cool when the lockdown started our daughter was in pre-k when the lockdown start now she has her learner's permit she's she's picking me up from work tonight after the show after more than a year of zooming from their rooms this is what it was like in los angeles this morning [Applause] that's right off to applebee's you know the um they're easing into it there are new policies in place to make schools safe some classes are being held outdoors desks are being spaced apart so the kids aren't closed bullies are asking nerds to stick their own heads in the toilet first swirlies this is interesting you know what is seeing an uptick during the pandemic besides crying ufos or at least sightings of ufos reports of unidentified flying objects have skyrocketed there were a thousand more sightings nationwide over the same period last year most of the reports came during march and april when lockdown was at its most strict and we were at our most high but listen i when you've been staring into a ring light for 12 hours a day you're bound to see some circles in the sky florida congressman matt gates thanks everybody i appreciate that it's no no it's now you're patronizing okay matt gates is that a congressman from florida with the hair he is under investigation by the justice department and the health house ethics committee turned into a a warner brothers car okay and the health ethics committee and they are investigating allegations of sex trafficking of a minor gates made an appearance at the trump doral resort in miami this weekend for something called the save america summit is hosted by a group called women for america first which is hilarious and their keynote speaker had a dire warning for the ladies at lunch so when you see the leaks and the lies and the falsehoods and the smears when you see the anonymous sources and insiders forecasting my demise know this they aren't really coming for me they're coming for you no they're coming for you they're not coming for just you let he who has never van mode a prostitute cast the first stone sadly for matt that trump hotel in miami was as close as gates he got to the t-man the congressman was reportedly denied a meeting with trump at mar-a-lago which that has to be a heartbreaker matt gates was like the son donald trump never had now he's getting treated like the sons he does have and this would be the part of the movie where gates disguises himself as a caddy and tries to sneak into mar-a-lago i mean how toxic do you have to be for trump to not want to meet with you he's literally pen pals with kim jong-un he once invited the taliban for a weekend of glamping at camp david and now he won't let matt gates come see him team gates did push back on the report that he got the cold shoulder a gate spokesman said he has not solicited a meeting with the president any time recently this by the way is the spokesman for matt gates not kidding his name's harlan hill what is going on there that is not a spokesman that is a four-year-old dressed up as orville redenbacher for halloween this story that trump doesn't want to see him was really a bug matt gates because he tweeted this is a total lie i am on a pre-planned vacation with my fiance and that's got to be a fun vacation right now honey it's all fake news no it's the deep state no the president loves me nothing's funnier than these guys who sold their souls to donald trump coming to him in their time of need and thinking he's going to help them asking donald trump for a favor is like asking a nigerian prince for a refund you're not getting it okay instead of meeting with matt gates trump um on saturday night trump was the recipient of the first ever champion for freedom award which was given by a group of republican fundraisers trump strolled in in his golf clubs and had these kind words for his old friend mitch trump called senate republican leader mitch mcconnell a quote dumb son of a unquote i don't know that doesn't sound like my president trump according to those in attendance trump also mocked mcconnell's wife the former transportation secretary elaine chow he said i hired his wife did he ever say thank you and he also very falsely claimed that the crowd that stormed the capital had over a million people he he can't help himself the violent and treasonous insurrection i directed was the biggest violent and treasonous insurrection and history and he still wants credit for the vaccine trump said that someone suggested him that the vaccine should be called the trump scene and he liked that the trump scene would be a mix of adderall hydroxychloroquine and ketchup and of course he still says he won the election these this is getting sadder and sadder this is like smash mouth at a county fair telling you their new album is number one only billboard won't report on it [Music] on to more important matters there is an infestation unfolding in the state of ohio that i think demands national attention it started on wednesday night multiple citizens called 911 claiming they saw monkeys on the loose at a cemetery in the east price hill neighborhood of cincinnati police officers and animal experts searched for hours they came up no monkeys at all and the only hard evidence that these monkeys exist is this grainy video someone posted to facebook they're just sitting up there they were swinging from the trees hey there's one down below you yeah it's right there look you can see them look what they're kind of like yeah i'm too blind for that oh my god look there's three i'm right there oh right there there's three of them right there wow thank god someone was there to shoot it with a broken motorola razor no one's really sure what's going on there aren't any monkeys missing from the zoo in cincinnati police think these could be from a private collection but no monkey owners have filed a missing primates report and not only that this pack of mystery monkeys is starting to grow they now say it's a gang of five five monkeys have been spotted in saint joe's cemetery officers and volunteers are scouring the area over at east price hill we talked to people in the area who have seen them and they say they're very tall almost uh you know human like sizes as big as trash cans at first we thought they might have been possums or something but then we seen them actually swinging from the trees like monkeys and we were like oh those are monkeys for real and that's when we started flashlights and recording it and stuff seeing their tail white right right right there [Laughter] it's a monkey do monkeys wag their tails sounds like maybe they've got dog monkeys running around and the police haven't been able to confirm any of these sightings or get in contact with any of the people who made the 911 calls but fear not because an amateur monkey sleuth named charles is on the case i was over there and he shot that way charles delph looked like he was about that tall says he saw one of the monkeys thursday morning he decided to search after hearing about the unusual story but then i was making my grill sound and once i brushed the tree that's when it was about this tall shot that way charles can you recreate those gorilla sounds for us you know sometimes to catch a monkey you have to become a monkey as of today the police have still not found any monkeys and they believe the whole thing could be misinformation what do you think it is guillermo do you have any theories it's a crazy story we may have to go to cincinnati to investigate this ourselves let's do it we have many trips planned guillermo and i and one of them is to japan to compete in the olympics again you know games were supposed to be held last summer they're now scheduled to take place in tokyo at the end of july and we want to be in them not at them in them we want to compete now obviously we can't do gymnastics or swimming or tennis or diving or really any any of those sports but there's one event i think we could have a shot at so we got in touch with a former olympian from the united states we asked him to teach us everything he knows in the hope that guillermo and i will have a chance to test our olympic medal and before we share this i want you to know two things number one it was raining and very cold and number two i forgot i was chewing gum so sorry for that [Applause] hi we're in the rain with allen james allen you are an olympic athlete for the united states do you practice even when it's raining even when it's raining your sport is what the race walking and it's a 20k and 50k uh race box didn't it used to be called speed walking well some people call it speed walking but it's called race walking now it's raining um my actually cold too my nipples are protruding is that going to be a problem it shouldn't be a problem no no not at all no so tell us about your sport in fact let's look at some video of your sport here that's how i walk when i really have to use the bathroom is that the kind of thing that's the kind of thing we're going to do now these people are walking as fast as they can a lot of them are walking as fast as they can it's just you have to maintain within the rules what are the rules the rules are that as one foot lands the other one is leaving the ground so there's the contact with the ground you always have to be touching the ground with your feet that's the difference between running when you're up off the air and running you're bouncing off the ground yeah all right teach us the key is to to land on your your heel okay and then you just kind of roll forward you can you can bend your knee as it comes through guillermo are they watching really closely yeah and do people get penalized a lot is it something that happens regularly well it can get uh three disqualification calls and then the on the fourth they make you sit in a penalty box wow there's a penalty box penalty box i like a sport with a penalty box can i go away for you at the penalty box no you do realize the mexicans have won more medals in race walking than any other is that true that's true yeah but we go like this look oh you're getting better it looks better [Applause] oh my goodness why he's not getting around he's right he's out he's ready okay look at you again [Applause] i'm going to have you guys start off with uh just don't worry about your arms you're just going to swing them like a long wave our arms in the air like we just don't care like sure okay just like you don't care but what you're going to do is kind of step out and just kind of walk with a straight leg and bend it through you're doing it perfectly jimmy perfectly all right now pick up the pace a little bit a nice roll from your heel to your toes and this is cool right as far as picking up women uh so we're gonna go home now are you cold here let me warm you up you know what when you're in competition it doesn't have to be unfriendly right i'm starting to get an erection let's separate all right all right i'd really like to see you go full speed and kind of see how it's really done okay well oh he's taking off oh oh my god all right all right here here take that all right let's start off slow it's like walking with something's wrong yeah good job keep doing it keep doing it good job good job don't give up go all the way go yeah good job i feel like i could be almost that fast like if we were racing like a sprinter like if we're running against usain bolt he would blow by us but i feel like we could maybe hang on these are right well i think we should try let's try it you mind if we try to race you but for real like we want you to really race us okay all right he's gonna start back there and we're gonna start right here on your marks get set go jimmy don't let him catch up [Applause] we're doing pretty good [Applause] yeah you know i didn't see it once i he got in my tail the smoke yeah but uh oh i couldn't see the form but uh how's you want to go for the most part absolutely so honestly on a scale of one to ten what do you think well i would say guillermo you're probably about a uh three or four okay somewhere um i think with your build you could you know i'd say about a four to five so a little bit of work good job it's the first time doing it well thank you we are you know what we're gonna try a number of events and we think that maybe this might be the one for us to get into the olympics in 2021 or two or whenever they actually happen sounds great thank you all right appreciate it thank you very much it stopped raining alex you know it doesn't always pay to be early what's next what do you think i'm dinging what badminton oh wow yeah yeah think about it all right hi i'm jimmy kimmel an evil wizard has trapped me inside this youtube video click subscribe to help me escape

Channel: Jimmy Kimmel Live

Views: 2,408,279

Keywords: jimmy, jimmy kimmel, jimmy kimmel live, late night, talk show, funny, comedic, comedy, clip, comedian, mean tweets, Pandemic, Coronavirus, COVID-19, Social Distancing, Quarantine, Monologue, Los Angeles, Back to School, UFO, Zoom School, Matt Gaetz, Congressman, Florida, Trump, Mar-A-Lago, Donald Trump, Harlan Hill, Champion for Freedom Award, Vaccine, Cincinnati, Monkeys, Guillermo, Olympics, Tokyo 2020, Japan, Sport, U.S. Olympian, Speed walking, Track

Id: _M-ip0Y49Q0

Length: 14min 47sec (887 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 12 2021