Jordan Schlansky’s Origin Story | Team Coco Radio

I'm here with a very special guest at the moment this is someone I get asked about more than anyone else I've worked with in late night Wherever I Go wherever I go in the world uh probably once a day people come up to me and say what's the deal with Jordan schlansky he is a phenomenon so I thought I'd have Jordan come in sit down and maybe we'd talk about this and see if we can't figure out uh what this relationship is uh really all about so sitting here is George Lansky hello Jordan hi are you close enough to the microphone you have to tell me that's not my responsibility okay well why don't you put the microphone a little closer to your mouth you are being an incredible prick already I didn't realize it was functioning as an audio engineer but I'm happy to comply okay I'm not an audio engineer but I could tell immediately I don't know how these are calibrated you've been in this studio many times this is my first appearance okay you if you're listening right now and you're driving and you're uh clenching the wheel angrily uh I apologize that's because like me when someone comes on and takes an arrogant inhuman tone you get upset why would you assume I know how many inches this is meant to be from my mouth that's like quite an assumption that's a great Point how many inches is this from my mouth you just opened yourself up to I mean if the Impractical Jokers right now were on the line they'd be having a blast you how many inches is this from my mouth Jordan let's get started before you get combative or strange please answer these questions succinctly how did you come to work for me do you remember the year I do the year was 1994. I was an unpaid intern initially and then I was hired to continue my employment okay so you started out as an intern and then some idiot decided to hire you on permanently and you were paid and then eventually you got a title on the show which was oh I don't remember what I started at there were news titles yes I'm sure there were numerous what was the title you ended up with associate producer right man if there's ever been a vague term uh it would have to be associate producer because we started using you on the show and when I say using you I mean featuring you as a personality because you're so unusual I think it was uh Frank Smiley I'll give Frank Smiley the credit Frank's my longtime producer on our show said Jordan's fascinating we need to get him on camera I thought that was kind of immoral you know uh in a way to take advantage of someone with your limitations and exploit you but Frank was determined and we did and so I I also blame Frank for empowering you um Frank do Frank's here by the way Frank well do you remember um Jordan worked on the show and then you one day said uh we got to get this guy on on camera well I mean it was an easy softball for you to hit out of the park every time because we had this relationship and it wasn't being recorded yes the relationship that people see in these remotes was basically going on in the office every single day yes and people think oh is this an act no it's not an act because it was going on for several years before we you even thought to put this on camera that's right it was during the writer's strike when we were desperate for um material that wasn't that didn't need any writing yeah you just needed me and Jordan in a room together and stuff would start to happen right because he so naturally um provocative yes there's nobody like Jordan and um he's a strange man yeah and uh it um you know it's obvious that America loves him yeah America has taken you to its Collective bosom I do mean bosom Jordan I swear to God almost every day people ask me what's the deal with Jordan my son loves in and out the In-N-Out hamburger chain here in California and a bunch of years ago we're passing one and my son is really hungry and he says hey can we go to In and Out and I say sure thing so we pull over into the parking lot and my son goes into place his order and uh uh I'm standing outside the car a truck a semi truck screeches to a halt the driver puts it in neutral and puts on the emergency brake jumps out and runs across the highway and says to me I just have to know is Jordan real that's the kind of I mean he this guy thre he put his life in danger to find out if you are real I still don't have the answer I still don't know exactly what you did on our show what does an associate producer do what was your job what did you do for us why did we pay you uh well across the entertainment industry the title associate producer is somewhat variable I had a multitude of responsibilities geared towards the smooth operation of the show okay again what a cloud of nonsense well I could tell you uh what one of my responsibilities was not and that was not to explain to you what I do okay oh okay so that was not your job let me explain to people listening right now if you're familiar at all with the defense mechanisms behind a modern nuclear sub here's how it works if it's attacked what happens is that the the enemy ship fires a torpedo at it that homes in on the large metallic structure that is the sub as it gets close one of the things that the sub that's being attacked can do is it can shoot out a lot of metal shards and junk out of the side and that distracts the missile so it veers off and attacks the space the junk that's been emitted and doesn't hit the actual sub that's what you do every time I ask you what do you do for a job you open your mouth and you eject a bunch of and it misdirects the question uh the question explodes harmlessly often the Briny deep and your sub is saved and you you seem to take pride in your own ignorance as to my responsibilities as if this is something you should be bragging about not understanding what your employees do it's not my responsibility to explain to you it's a belabor every detail of what I do what the real question is what are you doing right now what are you doing to fill your time I'm doing a Serious XM do you realize what an honor it is to get channel 106. do you know what was on channel 106 before I took it over do you consider this a full-time occupation I don't know I'm really enjoying it and I think you're just bitter that you're not able to skim uh any of your own cashola off my off my Sirius XM gig I think you're angry that you can't be associate producer of SiriusXM channel 106. I'm indifferent I'm here to ask the question answer the questions that you asked me well I love it when different people start shouting at me I'm completely indifferent

Channel: Team Coco

Views: 2,022,170

Keywords: Team coco, coco, conan o'brien, conan, best moments of conan, conan obrien interview, conan obrien podcast, sketch, comedy sketches, conan funny moments, teamcoco, funny, humor, official, stand-up comedy, andy richter, triumph the insult comic dog, celebrity interview, late night show, team coco radio, sirius xm, radio, jordan schlansky, late night with conan obrien, late night

Id: HjafS2kv5w8

Length: 7min 36sec (456 seconds)

Published: Fri Mar 31 2023