- Hello and welcome to another
edition of Buzzfeed Unsolved Post-Mortem, a show where
we answer your most pressing questions about the most recent
episode of Buzzfeed Unsolved which was JonBenet Ramsey, all
the questions we're answering today came from you guys
via our Buzzfeed Unsolved Facebook page, which
you can see right here and if you do your stupid animations. - And here goes Mrs. Hot
Dog, she's living it up without her husband, flying
right by on a pickle boat. - Oh wait, she doesn't know he's alive? - She doesn't know he's alive. - He's gonna come back
like Michael Meyers. - Look at how happy she
is, she doesn't know. - I hate that I actually am
invested in this story now. - Yeah, it's pretty rich and compelling. - It's fucking stupid, it's
like Blood Simple for hot dogs. - For hot dogs. Starting it off with a soft ball. This one's from Jenna Farley
on Facebook, she says, "Please discuss in your Q&A
your thoughts on the theory "that JonBenet Ramsey actually
being Katy Perry, thank you." Thank you, Jenna. She looks like her. - That's pretty much all
there is to that theory. - All you got, all you got. - Also, there's that little
fact that JonBenet Ramsey was born six years before Katy Perry, but you know, details. - Be a hell of a success story. - Why would you fake a horrible
strangulation and beating just so you could write
I Kissed a Girl in 2008? - Right, if they truly wanted to fake her, stop her modeling career,
just stop dressing her up like a little show pony. - Chloe Zelden says, "Why
is Shane cooler than me?" He's not. - Nope. - So good on ya. This is gonna be the longest
question we've ever answered, I think, this comes from
Mya-Angelique Henry, and by the way, this is a
question that a lot of you had, why we didn't address this, so here it is. "When I first heard of this
case, I researched it for days, "I believe that Burke is
the killer of JonBenet "and his parents helped
him to cover the murder "to avoid punishment, here's my evidence. "JonBenet had been found, upon an autopsy, "to have undigested
pineapple in her system, "despite the fact that the
Ramseys did not recall serving "JonBenet the fruit, a bowl
of pineapple with a spoon "in it was found on the kitchen
table beside a tall glass. "Upon further inspection,
the bowl of pineapple "had the fingerprints of
Batsy and Burke Ramsey on it "and the glass had Burke's fingerprints. "Burke had a violent past with his sister "and had often gotten
into fights with her. "I believe that Burke
was eating said pineapple "on the night of the murder,
JonBenet then stole some "from the bowl, Burke got
angry and in turn hit her "over the head with a
flashlight, this action coincided "with the bludgeoning, Burke
then sought out his mother "who wrote the note, hence
the ransom being so close "to the father's bonus, and
the fact that the evidence "shows it was written in the house. "I think then John had
strangled JonBenet to make "the murder seem
orchestrated by a kidnapper, "and moved her into the basement. "Burke also showed weird
behavior in this interview, "note the smiling and fake laughter, "a blatant brush-off of the
theory, the type of behavior "I don't think a brother
would have during an interview "about his supposedly murdered sister. "This is just my idea, but
it could all be wrong." Wow.
- That's a lot. - Lot to unpack there.
- Oh boy. - First off, let me just
say what people think, they think it's one of
these two because they had the fingerprints there, there
had been rumors that JonBenet was a bed wetter so maybe
Patsy Ramsey got upset, like frustrated, whacked
her over the head, Burke got angry that she
took his favorite snack, which is pineapple,
whacked her over the head. The thing that doesn't make sense to me is evidence shows she was
strangled while she was alive and not only does it show
that she was strangled while she was alive, it kinda shows that she
may have been fighting. That to me suggests an
intruder and abduction more than an accident. - Yeah, so the part of that theory then, where they fake strangle
her after she's already. - Yeah, so that doesn't make any sense because she was alive, also
some people think that maybe she got hit in the head
so hard that she was like, I don't know, out of it to
the point where they wanted to just finish it off.
- Okay. Well we're back to the
part where I'm bummed out and don't wanna talk about this anymore. - Yeah, and that interview
he had with Dr. Phil. - It's weird.
- Which admittedly, you watched and were
like, this guy's a weirdo. - Mhmm. - He looks nervous.
- Yeah. - You're being accused on national media of murdering your sister. - And I give people
pineapple all the time, I don't always remember it. Here's from Bruva Cavalcanti, Cavalcanti. Here's from Bruna, "If
it wasn't the family, "I would bet that it was
someone close to them "who never got to be
classified as a suspect "or at least someone close to her father, "since the only way to
know the amount of money "that the father earned would
be, A, it was the mom or dad, "or B, it was someone who
knew how much the guy got. "Unless it was a coincidence,
but it's too spot on "to be only random numbers. "Love you guys, and PS, Shane
is going to kill someone "at some point and I won't be surprised." - Jesus Christ, yeah I guess I
wouldn't be surprised either. - What are you talking,
you're more likely to do that, I think.
- I don't think so. - Yeah 'cause the way your
eyes glaze over sometimes and then there's nothing
there, there's nothing. (spooky music) I'm not a murderer. - Obviously it had to be
someone close to the family. Yeah, I don't know how
they would know that number or it really is the biggest
coincidence of all time. - But you know, there's
probably a lot of people close to the family, if
they're pageant people, they probably know a lot of weirdos. - Next question we have
is from Andrea Chavez. This is another long one so just an episode of long ones.
- Long ones. - "In crime scene photos, there
was only snow in the front "of the house, not in
the back where the entry "to the basement was located
so it's possible an intruder "could have entered
without leaving footprints. - Oh!
- "Police also claim "the basement window was too
small, but a police detective "named Lou Smit proved in
a video how easy it was "to gain access through the basement. "He even showed that in
order to climb back out, "all that was needed was
something to step on. "In crime scene photos,
a suitcase was propped "right underneath the open
window where the intruder "would have escaped from. "Lastly, the Ramseys had
a Christmas party prior "where they invited many people "and gave them a tour of the house. "Is it possible that the
killer came to the party, "learned the layout of the
house, like JonBenet's bedroom, "grabbed some of the stationary, "and went home to draft the ransom note?" - Did I touch on the spiderweb? - I don't think you talked
about the spiderweb. - So there was a spiderweb
in the basement window, the open one that was
undisturbed and people posited that it's impossible to get through there without disturbing said spiderweb. - You know there's just
some guy who's like, no way, no way anyone crawls that does
and doesn't mess up that web. No, no way.
- Nah, no way they get past that fuckin' web. - No way! - Why is this guy, he's the
nicest guy from Brooklyn. - I'm in Colorado here.
- I'm in Colorado and no way he's getting
past that fuckin' spiderweb. - No fuckin' way anyone's
getting past that web. - No way, no fuckin' way.
(laughs) They just bring that
guy throughout different facets of the case every
time they have an answer or a question.
- No fuckin' way. - No fuckin' way. - Get outta here with that. - Get outta here, get outta
here, that fuckin' bullshit. (laughs) - Here's one from Jackson Foote. "If you were both lead
detectives on this investigation, "what would you do first and why?" If I were a lead detective on this, I'd probably quit right
away and go take a vacation in Myrtle Beach or something. - I think the first thing
I would do is make sure no one disturbs the crime
scene, which was not done here. If you ever come across a
crime scene, do not touch it. Just don't touch them if
they look half past dead because it's a crime scene. - Half past dead?
- Yeah, like well done. - Steven Seagal. - Is that actually? - You look half past dead. - That sounded like Dumbledore, it didn't sound like Steven Seagal. - Harry. - Don't disturb the crime scene, Harry. - We found pineapple in
Harry Potter's stomach. (laughs) - Last question.
- We already have one from this person, are you
double dipping on this? - No we don't.
- Yeah we do. - Is this our first double dip? - Yeah, did you mean to do that? - I didn't. - Well it's remarkable
commenting then, I guess, from Chloe Zeldin.
- Chloe Zeldin again, coming in hot. "You should make a spinoff where
you guys teach Morse code." That would be a good spinoff
if I knew Morse code. - Yeah, I think there were
people trying to decode what you said.
- Yeah I made a joke at the end of last episode where I said I would say who the
killer was in Morse code. I will now blink to you in Morse code who I think did it. - You don't know Morse code. He doesn't know Morse code. - And unfortunately, some
people actually decoded it, I heard that it was just like. - Numerous people wasted time
that they'll never get back, those are seconds of your life
that you spent on nothing. - Someone was drawing out
the actual blips and bloops on the little paper and
I was like, oh good lord. - It feels like it should
be a crime to steal time from people, you're like
stealing people's lives. - I thought it was pretty
obvious I was joking. Well everyone who knows Morse code knows who I thought did it. - What do we got this week, Ryan? - Oh shit, this week,
this week is a whopper, this week is a case that's
arguably more famous than the last case.
- More famous than JonBenet. - Yeah, you could say it's the most famous hide-and-seek champion of all time. - Well that's exciting.
- That does it for this episode of Buzzfeed
Unsolved: Post-Mortem, make sure you watch the episode on Friday and then send your questions
into the Buzzfeed Unsolved Facebook page which you see right here and now let's take another
visit into the hot dog saga. - Here he comes, he is
going after his wife and he's being carried by
a seagull across the ocean to chase her on her pickle
boat, isn't that weird? - Wait, what the, wait,
there's so much new information you just put in there. - Yeah, next week, the
thrilling conclusion of the hot dog quadrilogy. - That's not a thing.
- Yeah it is, quadrilogy. - No it's not.
- People say that. - No one says that.
(slurping) You know, when you sip
tea after saying things, it doesn't mean what
you've said is factual, it just makes you look like a jackass when it's in fact not factual. - Oh I just, look, I'm
not saying I'm right about everything, I just
feel like I often am right about a lot of things.
- Okay. (slurping) I don't think pickles float either. - [Shane] Throw a pickle
in a pond, you'll see. - [Ryan] You throw a pickle in a pond. - [Shane] You throw a pickle in a pond! - [Ryan] It's weird that you
spend a lot of time doing that. - [Shane] Oh yeah, it's so
weird that I throw pickles in ponds in my free time.
