Joe Rogan Experience #1525 - Tim Dillon

but tim dillon fresh off a covet test how you feeling buddy how's the nose feeling good you know when i go out with friends uh to restaurants in la they you know everybody gets the gun the temperature gun in your head but you know what's [ __ ] up a lot of my friends they don't do they do it to me and i'm like i guess i'm the only one that looks sick because they look at me and they go get him get him and then i ask other people i'm like were you hit on the way in they're like no so i'm like yeah it's weird it's like arbitrary the way they do everybody i know maybe they think like you're a little bit overweight yeah you could die they're like we don't want him dying at boa's steakhouse in west hollywood oh you could eat i didn't want me falling on a tick tocker beau is an outside place all outside out there all outside oh yes those outside places are they're they're doing good they're jammed but the [ __ ] inside places are doomed they are doomed and they will not reopen many of them a lot of them yeah yeah it's a big problem let me ask you this when do you think los angeles is going to open up back up again next spring wow like april well i mean it depends what the second wave does right if there is a second wave right does do we get clobbered in the fall or do it i mean by the time la reopens it's going to be terminator here don't you think that it's going to be terminator after november no matter what we do probably i feel like with all of the [ __ ] tension like there was a story in chicago right they thought it was a 15 year old girl was shot by the police it turned out to be a 20 year old man and he was shot but he was still alive how did they get that wrong the [ __ ] telephone game right you know that game yeah it doesn't work it's crazy so then everybody goes crazy and goes looting so like people are looking for an excuse to go crazy if there's trump wins again yeah it's gonna burn not only that it's like yeah it's gonna be the mail-in thing right are they gonna take days 100 wow yeah so it's going to take days i mean i assume they're going to have some polls open some places and we're not going to know we're not going to have an answer that night no that's going to be a fun week of not knowing who the president is remember when it happened in 2000 no one cared it was funny yeah that we didn't have a president like there was all those snl skits and you know everybody's making fun of it there was no real unrest no in 2000 but now we cannot handle the uncertainty of not knowing we need to know that night yeah the dangling chads thing it's no big deal yeah it was funny everybody was wondering everyone was like what what what are we doing laughing off we were all going we don't need a president yeah whatever we were so much more emotionally healthy as a country at that moment than we are now yeah this is funny but it is true yeah because we laughed we go yeah who cares yeah they go we're fine and but now it's like chaos and we need a break like we need a break whoever like everybody can't be a political pundit like my aunt cannot be writing about trade on facebook i think we just leave it all to alyssa milano yeah looking forward to her tweets in november i'm just gonna follow all that yeah yeah well she was like she's got a podcast we know that she's fine yeah i mean it's relevance right they're all trying to be relevant everybody's relevant like they have to be you have to get your opinion out there it's super important and that's the way to be relevant now is to just be you know like be political all day every day when you go from actor to activist yeah all in very interesting as soon as the [ __ ] calls stop coming in you're like all right i'm an activist what's so funny is we know because we're like in in this thing that getting good at this whether it's comedy or being an actor is very tough you're not spending your life thinking about other people let's just be real for the most part you're just not i didn't you're thinking about your career yeah you're thinking about your career i've spent the last decade thinking about myself my jokes how do i get ahead how do i get ahead how do i get on television for three minutes like so this idea that these people are now going to pretend that they've spent their entire career thinking about global warming it's just not true like i know these people like i've met these people oh yeah and and my friends have opened for some of these people and i know that like these people are going out there and they're like you know listen we got to do this we got to do that they got to move the country forward but i've seen them make people cry backstage at a theater because there's not enough water in the dressing room right so it's those same people yeah that are really cruel going out and telling everybody how good of a person they are all the time well they find the pattern they find the pattern the the way they have to talk and the things they have to talk about when they lock into those things with no deviation they find whatever the line is where hollywood wants whatever the line is always left yes it's always super progressive always super woke and they [ __ ] ride that line yeah like a [ __ ] railroad train just choo choo straight down no deviation it's so obvious i know dudes i used to do open mics with who like they're tweeting it mayor garcetti they're tweeting about the budget in l.a they're like the budget's being passed they're tweeting garcet the budget i'm like god you can't you don't have the money to pay your rent like you have no idea what's going on in the world and you're tweeting at garcetti about them and they're doing it so that they can get a job right they're doing it so that somebody can see him and go you know what he'd be you know he'd had a great garcetti tweet he should write on bojack horseman that's the way it works it does kind of work like that i've i've i've just i've never been more amused it's very funny but i'm also terrified it's very we're gonna die it has both of those things happening it's like part of me is laughing at how stereotypical everybody is and how cliche yeah but then part of me is like this is terrifying like the the people at each other's throats people are enemies now like listen people never loved each other because it's a competitive business but like i i know like people it wasn't nearly as intense right as it is right now like the feeling of like if you disagree with somebody they are your enemy in comedy and they want you to not have a job like and i've never felt that way about anybody i don't care what you if you're funny i truly don't care if you're a communist if you're out whatever whatever you are you're not you don't have any power it's not like you're affecting my life you can believe whatever you want if you're funny you're funny i don't like to say this in generalizations because i don't think i don't believe in generalizations but right i love them i do too they're fun i need them they're they're the best for college yeah i mean we need them without generalizations comedy kind of stuff yeah but more people on the left are doing this than people on the right yeah i don't see that many people on the right i see a few but i don't see as many people on the right calling for people to get canceled forever but the people on the left are like burn their house burn them to the ground well the right will do it the right i mean the q anon thing's kind of a way they're doing it where they're like david spade's got an ankle bracing on and he's in jail and trump's put everyone under house arrest like they're in this other thing where it's like oh you guys have left the planet and you like so explained to people who don't know what this q and change well the q and stuff is like there is this idea that there's an intelligence dissemination operation happening meaning behind the scenes high-level intelligence guys or military people are leaking information about a shadow war that we don't really see happening and the shadow war involves trump and the people on the side of lightness battling the you know these deep state pedophile pedophile cannibals like i don't know why like i don't never understood why they have to be cannibals i didn't know they were cannibals they're no they're cannibals they're eating children and then they get the adrenal chroma it keeps them young oh that's right so this whole thing and then trump is going to war with all of them right now listen pedophilia is a big problem they do cover up [ __ ] at high levels 100 yes the epstein stuff is 100 real 100 clinton's on that plane he's on that island 26 times yeah the franklin scandal there's scandals all over the world so i'm not delegitimizing like the idea of real human trafficking but the idea that donald trump is fighting human traffickers and the human traffickers are ellen who is a little wild that everyone in hollywood's eating children and there's tunnels under central paul i mean it's hard to keep up with and the queue drops so to speak are like these these um you know they're like they're like poems or they're they're coded information so it's never like hey this is what you get these drops where do you get a 4chan or something you get them like unfortunately okay but 4chan is the best place in the world for trolls you know it's a lot of fun well that's what maybe this is this could be like that's what i'm saying yeah it could be a high-level troll nobody knows because it's bait it has nuggets of truth right right just like anything else right it has nuggets of very real things the government is shady as [ __ ] a lot of the elites are doing things engaging in pedophilia and probably worse yeah like i some of those kids on epstein's island probably did disappear but the idea that like that that trump is fighting this underground war and it's all about human trafficking i just don't think that's borne out by the facts like there's no facts to point i mean trump was like friends with the clintons for his whole life well not only that if trump was doing it and not talking about it it would be so character like imagine this one thing that he's doing that's the most noble thing that he's ever done ever right he's not selfless the most important the moment for humanity and he's not even bringing it up he's just secretly winking yeah all the cue people well you know and and so everything he does there's like a reason that he does it they say like when he wishes lane maxwell he goes i wish her well yeah now the thing is that's a rich guy who's forgetting he's the president who's just on a t at mar-a-lago because that's how rich people talk i mean that's literally and i've been around a few like really wealthy people this is how they talk when you say something bad anything bad if you go you know you know john's wife has cancer you know that kid had a dewy he's got a problem he had a couple incidents there at harvard they go like this guy i wish him well tee off that's that's how they talk that's how they it's just a dismissal it's a way to dismiss it but the q people are like oh there's a meaning there's hidden meaning right he's saying that she's and if you look at ivanka's wearing this dress and it means and it's just like listen i'm a conspiracy guy but this is exhausting well i don't think he's too much jacket the jacket yeah i don't care do you yeah isn't that what it said yeah i don't care i don't really care to you right what yeah i mean it's weird [ __ ] is this yeah these are weird things what are we doing so i think the trump administration feeds the trolls like i think they like it i think he'll by the time the election rolls around he'll be like full full cue just leaning in who's who's behind the scenes pulling the strings is it ivanka they say jared kushner has a lot of power but wouldn't be funny if it was ivanka doing the whole thing she's the one like stroking her chin like she's the boss what is the nugget we release next right she's q a she's the smart one who's like how do we how do we yeah she's the pretty daughter everybody dismisses her i mean nobody takes nobody's right right she's in the background on the whole [ __ ] show she's cute black leather gloves on yeah that go to the elbow like the inspector gadget hand you just see your hand typing on 4chan send send yeah i don't i don't know man you know steve bannon said something and there was a documentary about errol uh aaron morris made a documentary about steve bannon he bannon said this very interesting thing he said you know there's a guy uh out there who's got a horrible life like he's divorced his kids don't like him he has a shitty job but when he plays like league of league of legends or world of warcraft one of these games he's a hero and when he dies in real life nobody really cares but when he dies in the game so many people come out and they like you know they show him respect because you're playing with people from all over the world so bannon's like which which life is the real life so which of course it's the real one that you're living not this fantasy game but i think the q anon thing i think the trump administration is like yeah let people believe they're hunting pedophiles online it gives their lives meaning like let these people believe they're like hunting the clintons it's like fun it's like a fun video game for them and then they don't have to ask why they don't have health insurance and can't get a knee operation i don't think that it's that involved i think it's just a thing that's happening yeah that happens to fit in with human nature that's probably true too yeah like i don't believe that the trump administration has the resources to do that but still i mean they would have to be so 4d chess they would they would really have to be they may like encourage it a little i think they may just pour a little gasoline on it maybe yeah maybe why not if they think that's their base yeah they're like why not they're having fun when you go out to a trump rally you want a little fun oh for sure yeah yeah it's the things that he does that are mistakes yeah like these these interviews that he does where he or he'll argue about [ __ ] like he'll he'll argue about how well they're doing or what you know what's wrong or what he got right or what his iq is or how well he did at this uh intelligence test like anybody who's playing like 3d chess is not going to do that no no he's not playing any chess he's going back instinct he's he's riffing and we've said it before i've said it on the show before it's like it's amazing to watch a guy get up no material and just crush i mean just he's really going by instinct he's like perf he's perfectly suited for this era yeah because he's like he he's hypnotizing like if you start listening to him he can't stop like i'll try to watch one five minute clip of an interview i end up watching the whole hour yeah because he's like there's a hypnotic thing that's going on where he just is up and down and you're just you can't not listen have you ever seen scott adams talk about him no scott adams is an interesting guy he's a very intelligent guy he wrote the dilbert comics you know yeah so he's basically saying that trump is like a master persuader and scott adams understands hypnosis and persuasion and interesting he's talking about the way the guy does it and how he does it that he's a master persuader a lot of people disagree with him but what's interesting is he's not he doesn't even vote scott adams doesn't vote and he's not really a trump supporter although he does say a lot of things that seem to like i think he he leans towards trump being more persuasive than just going by his gut because he sort of fills his he's got this theory yeah that aligns with his theory so he goes a lot i see him leaning into it a little bit where it's not like he's totally objective about it but he's lost millions of dollars because millions really like people oh [ __ ] yeah they've turned on him he was saying on twitter the other day that people uh slowed down in front of his house started screaming that he's a racist jesus for nothing just because because he said that trump is persuasive right he said that he thinks trump is essentially pulling people strings and manipulating people in a really interesting way yeah and he is i mean like any president does that but trump does it extremely well he does it a non-presidential way right that's why it's weird yeah it's a weird way of doing it he's a co i love con artists and grifters and to me trump is the highest level biggest con ever most successful you know without a question i mean like you know he's the king of all of those every guy sitting in an office right now calling people up trying to sell him [ __ ] over the phone that's the trump's the kid trump's the highest level that you can i mean anybody i mean if you're using a fake id yeah to try to buy cigarettes up the ladder there's donald trump like all the way up the lad and that to me i think because everyone's like he's evil or he's jesus it's like i don't i don't look at things that emotionally because i guess i'm just not a total loser i think that's really what it is i think if your relief of nothing going on everything becomes about politics which we don't i'm never going to meet nancy pelo i mean this is a television show right you know i'm not saying that real things don't happen that people aren't affected but this day-to-day like you're inundated with like he said she's their policy schumer it's like dude who cares my favorite pelosi and schumer image of all time was them with the african cloth yeah yeah the enemies not realizing that the cloth pattern they're wearing was from a tribe that was notorious for selling slaves yeah yeah well notorious for being a major part of the slave yeah well so is the democratic party for many years let's be honest that's what people don't know yeah that means when you go way back to the democrats democrats were the confederates yeah whoops so and it's just we've been looking at these people for too long we've seen an image that's amazing i love good but it's not as good as the one when they're on their knees i love the hands on the hips like oh and the mask as well they've got everything [ __ ] yeah yeah it's beautiful and someone was saying that like well you have to respect nancy pelosi someone said that to me and i said she wants 16 year olds to be able to vote they look by the way like invaders it just came into a country slaughtered people and took their clothing hopped off of a boat yeah they look like people that just colonized an area and took their cloth yeah they're they're wearing like swamp boots so they don't step into my blood how old is she a million she's a millionaire i mean dude does anyone retire does anyone step away no you you die at a trump rally like herman cain yeah what are you gonna do respect to herman cain respect no matter godfather yeah yeah went out there no mask he does what he wants but yeah he had cancer and knitting he had cancer i think oh did he yeah well he died of covet yeah if you have covet and you die of cancer you still huge die to cover hit by a car you die to coven i don't think they do it that far but well you'll see we'll see there's going to be a documentary in a few years about this i don't know new york times are saying today they think it's underreported they think that the covet deaths are somewhere around 200 000. yeah i mean listen i mean at a certain point you just you have to stop reading because everything you read every hour contradicts the last thing you've read yeah and they're like it's airborne no it's not yes it is no it's not i'm like what do i do you can get it off surfaces no you can't just kill me like i don't know what's happening well they don't know that's the problem they're making it up on the go because they're getting new data all the time they're constantly getting new information new studies new things show but they don't react to all the studies like one of the big ones is the fact that it dies in sunlight so right if that's the case well you should let people do all sorts of outdoor activities these studies when you read about the studies they're like we sampled a certain amount of people and this is what we found and it's like that's not necessarily indicative right of anything well it's it's information it's better than nothing yeah and it depends on who's reading the study and what their bias is and what they're trying to say um but it's clear that they're trying to figure this out i mean obviously it's only been around for six seven months and they say that the people that are really reacting to it in many cases a lot like for whatever reason their immune system has not had as many prior experiences with coronaviruses so if your immune system has gotten a lot of colds and you fought them off supposedly you're in a better position to deal with this than somebody who has not had that germaphobes are [ __ ] yeah germaphobes the fact that we were shaking hands and on and off planes that might be good that might have strengthened our immune system well they were saying that about people in prison like one of the reasons why the people in prison are doing so well with it like when guys are in prison you would say oh what a [ __ ] terrible place for your immune system but uh was it huberman was it uh andrew huberman was talking to us about this i think it was he was saying might not have been him too many guests they were talking about immune systems in that when you think of your immune system you think well if you're you're healthy and calm and well slept and you know you're not stressed out that's when your immune system is at its best well that's not really the case and those people that are in jail stuffed in next to all these people breathing in everybody's bacteria and all the viruses and [ __ ] that's in the air no escape from each other no way to social distance those people actually have pretty strong immune systems they're doing good because their immune system is like in shape so the la homeless population has got to be great oh yeah they're probably they probably have a natural immunity you know they have typhus i don't know you know that i have no idea they found typhus yeah yeah it's a middle-aged disease like it's come back because of like the conditions that the you're in the feces middle age medieval let me [ __ ] that up every time i do that i'm like this time i'm gonna get it right nope i always say but they're doing good with corona because they have strong immune system so why don't we open the comedy store up and just have the homeless be the servers like why can't we open up businesses in la and just have the homeless who've strengthened their immune systems operate the businesses let them shoot the voice let homeless people go in and direct the voice i don't think they don't show up a lot that's true they're a good point liable they're unreliable maybe you should have like three homeless for each job yeah like look someone's coming in becky's ready becky's on standby becca's over there shaking and scratching this is america's got talent there's 70 000 of them just in l.a it's crazy they don't even know really how many there are now because there's 70 000 of them before corona oh there's going to be there's going to be millions imagine if there's a million homeless people there's gonna be millions of homeless people it's gonna look very soon like a and it's already starting to get there like a movie like a post-apocalyptic movie where you drive down melrose and everything's boarded up and you see a lot like it's gonna start looking really bad here it could look really bad new york is a nightmare i've heard like new york the crime is skyrocketing and you know there's just you know the the the relationship between the police and the people is very fraught and it's very hot i mean it's like so the police like [ __ ] it we don't want to do anything and you're like you understand a lot of they're just like listen we're gonna sit back and then now a lot of areas are just being policed by criminal elements by gangs and stuff like that because that's what happens in a power vacuum you know if you get rid of the cops i'm not saying this shouldn't be reformed they shouldn't have all these new regulations but like if you defund them or get rid of them somebody steps into that vacuum and it's going to be usually a gang the mafia crime syndicate whatever dude de blasio not good if you think your mayor is bad de blasio is a nightmare he's like holding my beer he's bad he's the worst he eats pizza with a fork and what's great is that he does he does yeah what's great is that everyone hates them like the left hates them and that for different reasons and then the right hates them even the black lives matter people hate them because they're all so pandering what are you doing look at that oh eating pizza with a fork he's disgusting what kind of a [ __ ] human what is this the mafia who's he sitting with a bunch of old dead people who is this looking at the moment how ridiculous this is is the teachers one guy with the sleeves the guy with the sleeve tattoos he better not eat that pizza with a fork i will [ __ ] find him yeah i mean de blasio he's a fake human he's like a real human he's like a goofball yeah and he gets up with his wife they did like a rally right after coronavirus and like she gets up and she goes power to the people and then she thought like it was going to be like a 60s rally yeah and then the crowd was just stared at her like what the [ __ ] we're gonna die ladies yeah everyone's coffin yeah they thought it was gonna be like they were gonna start beating tambourines like power to the people like her and de blasio think they're like living some historic moment and though they are that's just not what they just not what they think they're in the wrong movie yeah it's uh it's rough man yeah cities are in trouble yeah well he he literally said you can only protest if it's a black lives matter protest yeah let's listen as much as i support the movement that is not freedom of speech you can't do that no that's anti-first amendment yeah but this is a big part of who we are you can't say no you can only do one kind of protest everybody's got a protest or nobody's got to protest right everyone's got to be allowed you gotta allow the anti-mass people with candace owens singing songs with sean hannity and you need to let the black lives matter people do it everybody's got to be able to protest yeah i mean i'm out in the da i rented a house in the desert and it's 119 degrees every day so peop not only can people not protest you can't leave your house without dying like if you leave your house you get skin cancer sauna life yeah and they tried to do a protest it lasted like sort of got less than three blocks they were like back like they were banging a thing they were like no justice they were like no no pete like they had no idea and then they were sitting down you saw them like sitting down eating ice i am one hundred percent for police reform hundred percent 100 i 100 believe there's too much police brutality too much i am also 100 in in the belief that there's a lot of people that are doing this and following this movement because like we were talking about before with actors it is the trendy thing to do social and then also what you're seeing in like portland and seattle you're seeing crazy white people trying to light government buildings yeah well they think if they if they bash the windows of amazon this is the beginning of the revolution how is it at all connected to police it's crazy it is not connected at all it's just anarchy it's just chaos when you unleash that like in the beginning of this like listen you burn down a target it was fine i even laughed i said it was a [ __ ] it's in minneapolis like did this happen in minneapolis so what a target gets it in minneapolis the guy gets charged the next day it's fine but when you unleash total chaos you know more about violence than anybody you can't control it no you can't direct it to the to the targets that you think are right it's also intoxicating and fun right all those people that are involved in it wearing masks showing up every day having a good time they're giving their it gives their life meaning right it does they're trying to beat the man right they're trying to break down the [ __ ] fence they put around the federal building and they're trying to light that [ __ ] on fire using bibles right they're lighting bibles on fire jesus i mean it's all chaos it's just insane how about the mayor of seattle's like maybe this is our summer of love yeah there i've never been there i don't want to ever go like i have not the pacific northwest i hate it i know you do i don't give a [ __ ] of those people i don't care about those trees and the trails and they all look like vampires they're pale and gaunt freaks they're so weird amway that scam started up there like multi-level marketing startup there yeah they're all looking for something to believe in and that's that those are problem areas well that's where brett weinstein was teaching at evergreen and they and that's where they came like patrolling the campus with bats looking for him he's like he's a as literally as progressive as a human can get right and he's also a nerd yeah super nice guy yeah and they you know they were coming for him it's it's i've never liked there's something about the pacific northwest i've just never i never connected with it i thought about living there once yeah but i mean that's your you love that stuff i don't give a [ __ ] it happens all the time i i know but that's why these people are out throwing bibles at the federal building is because it's raining all the time well i don't know what makes that place so progressive and so left-wing but the thing is is that like you saw hints of this many years ago where antifa would stop traffic yeah like doing these things and stuff and when people would they would get people to say black lives matter it's like what's the point is before that they weren't they weren't connected with black lives matter before the coronavirus thing before george floyd the antifa people it was all about right-wing people it was all about combating right-wing folks right like the proud boy they would have those skirmishes exactly right well that's where the proud boys came from they came from speakers exactly they wanted someone to fight back against antifa when he was shutting down correct people who are speaking at colleges who are right-wing people like milo or anybody whatever yeah those kind of people so that's where it all came from in the first place but when you would go to seattle they were letting these [ __ ] people direct traffic or was it portland it might have been portland they were letting these [ __ ] people direct they were telling people you can't go down this road yeah and so this old man was like i'm going and they started chasing him and they kicked his ass they're beating on his [ __ ] car yeah i don't know why people on twitter defend that and i don't know why a lot of celebrities defend it and i don't understand why a lot of mainstream democrats don't just call that out for what it is i've never once seen a mainstream republican ever i mean defend like the proud boys or or or that was certainly not their hill to die on like right if a mainstream republican defended them it was very like it was a huge news story usually i don't know why i think the big problem is it's like things are happening you see them with your own eyes and then people tell you that they're not happening right they're like no that protest is peaceful you're like i saw them light a guy on fire and use him as a battering ram to get into macy's they're like well you know he gave them a look there's always a qualifier it was this weird qualifier yeah they're like well here's what happened you're like they were beating a child they're like let me explain what happened yeah they were gathered together they had burning bibles bows and arrows bike locks and chains that child crossed the street that child said my dad's a cop you see the child starting you're like no there's always a weird like but they first they're the thugs of the left wing they're they're doing the dirty work that the left wing wants to get they're like theater kids they're like people that failed at stand-up comedy in theater and they moved back to portland from la and now they're like let's burn it all down i didn't get a comedy central half hour you've never seen them really what it is you ever see the ones that are practicing self-defense no they train they actually train they're like they were these antifa people were meeting in the park and they were getting ready for skirmishes with the right-wing people this is all pre-coveted right when this was funny right you know right right this was funny when it stopped being funny was uh how do you pronounce his last name go andy no andy yeah yeah yeah when andy no got beat up and then they shaked him and people were mocking and i'm like hey why do you think it's okay to beat this guy up like why do you think it's okay to steal this guy's camera like yeah what is that no one is saying this yeah then i started to say like okay this is this is gonna be a real problem and then the economy got shut down and you can and you're like oh this will only make this bigger yeah and bigger yeah this will only fuel the fire but again it's like these people who'd go there whether they're trying to light the federal building on fire or direct traffic they have a purpose now they have a thing and they have a cause right like when they took over that six sec six block section of portland or seattle rather yeah yeah or what was it that ch chow what what it was jazz or chop chop chop chop but it started as jazz but young countries often have you know they changed leadership hiccups and as they developed i was gonna have that guy on my show the guy razz yeah i was too then i got caught with a gun i know he was handing a a ak to someone or whatever i still would have had him but we couldn't get a zoom link working i was going to have him here in person really yeah interesting that would have been fun maybe yeah i was like listen man i support you do you know doing your thing but you can't bring it out of the gun it's like and i didn't even then they shoot dude they shot two people there well i don't know he didn't shoot well he didn't somebody definitely did the other thing they were doing that was crazy was they basically became a really shittily run country they put up borders almost immediately immediately barriers they weren't borders when people were doing things they didn't want them to do they were the worst case of police brutality they just beat the [ __ ] they just beat people up so if you were trying to film them doing something they didn't want you to film they just kick your ass well this is just like if you believe in something really fervently not not like it's always the ends justify the means like however you get there it doesn't matter right like anything's justified in the pursuit of this utopia that you think you're going to erect in downtown seattle well it's also you're doing for seven blocks what you think shouldn't have been done to america you're occupying land right you're taking over existing structures you're kicking out the indigenous people of seattle yeah i think i you know the shitty thing is like electoral politics isn't perfect but that's what you have to do like look at cortez she got elected you know like the people that believe the things you believe can get elected they have to work within the system because all the violence that chaos will do will give the government a reason to even clamp down more now they got people and throwing people in advance in portland the dhs because again you're not going to overthrow the government right you're not gonna overthrow the military it's not the way it's gonna work right they can catch you breaking public property it's just gonna be an excuse for them to clamp down more and it's gonna where we're gonna be in more of a police state than we were yeah the idea that when they did that that somehow another incited the violence to get worse like that is i don't know if that's true no it was it was chaos every night for 50 days i'm not for the unmarked vans i think that's a bad i think all of those things end up being because look at what happened after 9 11 they said we're going to do this this and this and then all of a sudden nobody got any rights back by the way your emails are still being read you have no privacy all of that's still there so if we just establish a precedent of like yep some people need to get thrown in a van and we'll explain we'll explain uh why that is yeah that becomes a major problem going forward did you see when they got thrown into vans how excited everybody else was what's your name what's your name we'll get you out friends right it's like you guys are all on luke skywalker this is what happened the resistance when you shut a country down for three months this is the only fun left yeah nothing's open anymore the only fun fun thing to do is to overthrow the government get thrown in the van yeah this is summer vacation to people yeah this is a you know they used to have those dumb escape rooms that people used to do escape rooms you shut the [ __ ] up they're stupid i love them but this is a real one this is a fun real one now it is a fun how fun is that how do you like the federal building now it's now it's a real one yeah yeah it's uh it's interesting man and i wonder how these people are going to transition into regular grown-up life afterwards well i think that's [ __ ] joe i think regular grown-up life to ship itself on both sides like the people that were in charlottesville marching around like we're gonna have a white country we're gonna i mean these people they will not replace us yeah they will yeah it's like those people are as well you'll never please the far left and the far right right like you'll never like the people that are really on the fringes you're never going to make them happy like kamala harris by the way is a fine vp choice yes we're all going to get put in jail yes she's going to put you in jail but guess what who is he going to pick elizabeth warren who lied about being a native american like kamal is good because the people in the middle don't care that she's a cop no one gives a [ __ ] no one cares you might care that she locked up people but the republican conventions could be very tough to really get people mad at kamala harris they're gonna be like [ __ ] come all everyone's gonna go yeah they're gonna go she's a cop and she locked up minorities he'll probably just go ah is this a real problem like i just think what do you think you think she's the worst i don't think she's the worst but uh i think it's it's very int well somebody wrote on twitter that the left is very much against sexism and racism yet they elected someone or they chose someone to be a bp based entirely on their sex and their race right but we knew that was going to happen we knew that was this is why all these people on twitter and guys that i really like like i really love kyle kalinski and those people but it's like they were like so mad about it i'm like guys didn't you see it was gonna happen didn't you didn't you like ever it's the most predictable choice in history i was thinking if they went nuclear michelle obama that would have been wild right right right right right one they would have won they would have won and cuomo from new york like meatball the governor of new york meatball and michelle obama win did you see the latest cuomo thing no what's he doing now kyle kalinski sent me this i mean he's out of control over there him and his bro his brother pretended to have coronavirus by the way they pretended well his brother chris cuomo said he beat coronavirus by doing chest exercises what swear to god there's a youtube video where chris cuomo is going you know this virus gets in your body and wants to stay there but you know what you just start stretching your chest doing this you get rid of it that's literally i mean he's never forget liar liar is that true yes he's alive you're gonna stretch your chest yes if you can find it jamie it's real and he said he cured himself he cured himself by doing chest exercises and stretching his lungs out well the worst part was when he pretended to come out of the basement for the first time when he had already been in a in a [ __ ] fight with some guys no these people on the bike they're pathological liars both of them i don't think that's what the case is okay this is my take from a person who's worked in show business for a long time i think he had a producer that had at cnn and they had this shot scheduled you're going to we're going to film you coming out of the basement it's going to be amazing you're going to race your family for the first time in two weeks okay did the producer make it pretend to have a virus protecting his wall street donors from democratic tax bills um so this is uh but the tweet i sent you jamie but i didn't send you the tweet here it is new disclosure records show andrew cuomo's largest headphone hedge fund donor just funneled huge money to the governor precisely the moment cuomo has been blocking democratic legislators bills to reinstate new york's financial transactions tax that's crazy that is crazy it's nuts if that's the tr if that's the case if like he knew that tax was coming and he blocked it just so that he could get paid i don't know enough about financing i don't know houses tell me i was a subprime mortgage guy i mean i know these things i mean what i mean you're my guy i go to yeah well good i mean i i i i it's very possible that he did block it so he could get paid i mean these people give themselves raises constantly no matter what circumstances are no matter what shortfall the city government's in these people constantly give themselves raises yeah and cuomo's got to play an interesting game because wall street money is how new york is even alive if enough wall street people leave you they're [ __ ] well they're [ __ ] right now they're [ __ ] right now fifty percent of the taxes in new york are paid by the rich right and they're leaving like one percent of the people pay fifty percent of that yeah a lot of them went to the hamptons a lot of them got out of the city and a lot of them were leaving the city forever right so you you know you could [ __ ] on the rich blah blah i think a lot of them should you know a lot of them get get out of paying taxes by routing their money offshore and they do a lot of things they shouldn't do but that tax base is essential for that city 100 100 100 and this is where and also foreign criminals as sad as it is third world dictators chinese amusement park tycoons russian oligarchs and assorted murderers you need their money yeah otherwise how you gonna sell stock that's the reality like they have to come in and launder their money through new york real estate they got to come in and buy 10 apartments they don't use and then their daughter goes to nyu i i mean otherwise that whole city is going to fall apart it's not right or wrong good or bad it's like it's just what's gonna happen it's just what it is did you see cuomo trying to bring the rich people back it's like come on over i'll cook yeah i'll cook he they're go he's a goon how many people are you cooking for bro he's an idiot this is that folksy horse [ __ ] that they do like i'll make a meatball for you it's like i'll cook for you yeah how about not letting the city get destroyed how about not sending sick old people to the nursing home where they can infect everybody else well that i was for i think a good i think a good brush fire through the nursing homes is good to be honest with you oh god i mean my mother's in a nursing home her her roommate had covered for a month my mother never got it every day they would go in and they were like well you my mother's an annoying woman loud looks like me every day they walked in they're like will you die she's like i feel great so we're all hoping second wave but um it's like it's you know she won't die the woman's 300 pounds she won't die she won't die what is she eating everything probably her roommate who dyed a coconut she's probably eating her but the woman won't die she's indeed fatigable like they they can't great yeah i i whip it out here i don't know say it right i don't think i said i couldn't say medieval yeah here he is here it is this is how he beat corona i don't think that i think he's just talking about the tightness no no no no no he is stop defending him i have to defend all this this is insane because i have too much of that in me this is this is the vaccine for coronavirus by the way going like this stretching he's stretching stretching i like how the stairs are behind him yeah it's all horseshit he looks fine he's probably upset yeah it's probably sad he's not sick he's like he goes you know he goes this fires gets in he wants to kill you but he goes you know what i do he goes i just stretch the lungs stretch the lungs then and it's like okay so we shut down the economy for three months for a virus where you can just stretch your lungs you can stretch the lungs and then that's it something's off well this virus is [ __ ] up because yeah if you talk to some people it's nothing and i know people that have gotten it they're [ __ ] and they're not and other people that have gotten it and they're [ __ ] still right like i think michael yeoh is still having a problem with fatigue my man my ex managers uh his wife got it she still can't smell whoa how long ago three months she still she can smell a few things jesus i know is she healthy yeah she's a thin you know middle-aged woman yeah it's weird and they are also saying that some large number of people that get it they still they have uh heart damage so after it's over they show like that baseball player there's a professional baseball player that has to sit out the rest of the season he got checked out i mean i think he's 29 years old or something like that and they found out that he has uh some inflammation in his heart nobody knows why any of this is happening well i take it back to brett weinstein again because yeah brett who's a biologist was saying that this disease has all the markers of a disease that's been manipulated for research right that's why it does it's so infectious now manipulated for research like manipulated so that they can research it or manipulate it as like how can we make something dangerous that might be a weapon no they manipulate it so that they can do research on it so they can find out what kind of cures they can create for coronavirus interesting the lab that they did uh research at was in wuhan and it's a level four lab by a research facility and they had been cited in 2018 for safety violations they're getting real sloppy over there because when you're working under communism you don't have a lot of incentives right right a lot of money is true it's very possible that it this is a genetically modified virus and that and maybe that's why it has all of these different effects on people exactly exactly and it's probably morphing like they say the one in india is so different that if we come up with a vaccine for the american version it's not going to work on the indian version is this just the rest of the for the history now is just viruses and pandemics and like i mean this seems to be because all the conditions for this you know are are are are you know gonna still be there like they're still gonna be these wet markets they'll still be uh you know a lot of unsafe handling of of of of produce and and not only produce but like you know different types of animals and so this may not be the end of this maybe the beginning of an era of just different types of pandemics and viruses well they've been warning us about this for a while yeah bill gates had that ted speech yeah in 2015 he said it's coming yeah and you know now he's the devil now everybody's like bill gates i just think people get weirdly uncomfortable when it's like billionaires want to do like bill gates was considering once shooting a missile of dust at the sun to help climate change this is a fact what yes so he was considering this and then yeah where'd you read this this is what kind of dust uh how big the sun is yeah but bill gates was considering shooting a missile full of dust at the center so it's like now obviously people said to him hey not a good idea and he relented but when you have these batman villain billionaires not that they're evil but that they have a lot of money they can do whatever they want people get uncomfortable with just one guy saying this is the way it is and this is what you need people just feel uncomfortable you find that is that real that's real joe could dimming the sun save the earth bill gates wants to spray millions and tons of dust into the stratosphere okay that's different to stop global warming but critics fear it could triple calamity yeah that's not at the sun but what that is the suspending particles in the atmosphere they're going to act as like understood but the reality is people get a little they get a little uncomfortable when a billionaire from a lair is decided to start shooting dust into the atmosphere and you know where is where is the is there any democratic process here where anybody will ever have any say in anything ever again or are we just going to listen to bezos and him do it in there they could do whatever they want well it's hard to say because when you're that rich we listen anyway because we figured bezos has got 200 billion or something he's must know something that we don't know we assume sure but i mean smarter than who knows what you know also they have a lot of money i don't even think they want more money i think a lot of them just they want more well some of them do but they also have they just have designs in the way they want the world to look they have an ideology i trust bezos more than i trust bill because bezos doesn't wear a uniform bill gates wears that mr rogers uniform yeah i don't trust it i don't i trust warren buffett because i feel like he's in omaha just eating eggs he lives in the same [ __ ] house that he bought like that's a scam no he does that he does that so guys like us would be like what a down to earth guy like but he's a billion dollars lives in a 400 000 house something's wrong that makes me more suspicious than i would be if he had a man he should have a big match bill gates well that's not even his regular outfit the regular that's the regular outfit yeah he's a little sweater with the shirt what are you doing it's 100 degrees bill what do you wear then you know do you wear the same sweater with the shirt look he's got that [ __ ] he loves it but why is that that's the tech outfit man that's the silicon valley they're gonna people just get very nervous with silicon valley billionaires well it's an incredible amount of money and it's an incredible amount of influence people are really worried about mark zuckerberg yeah these guys are the new rockefeller carnegie and he's [ __ ] really young he's really young by the way speaks perfect mandarin well he's got a girl who's he's twice right yeah he's married jesus christ i don't know what he's doing i'm not invited to his home you're not i'll get you in i'd love to all you have to do is get your facebook page over 700 000 i'd love to go i'd get banned from facebook within an hour of being there be taken away i just i just go up to him and go can you get rid of my aunt kathleen please it's a crazy video of him in china and uh he's on a television show and he starts speaking in mandarin and they go crazy they can't believe he can do it they're clapping and cheering interesting it takes very little to impress them huh well they're just it's just a white guy he's doing it he's the guy from facebook speaking perfect mandarin wow but he's ready that's comforting by the way he's going to bring them all the head of the head of facebook is yucking it up with you know maybe our biggest enemy yeah that's nice he's going to be super excited about new world order give me some volume on this [Music] the translation is america will be a prison we will send your government to rule hour this is what happens when you're like a genius and you don't get laid in college and you just say you know what i'm just going to take over the world this is like pinky in the brain but the real thing well he's also a guy who is friends with the people who put together facebook yeah that's a great movie social networking i didn't see the movie but i really like articles real story the actual real story is kind of [ __ ] up yeah he kind of well there were those winklevoss twins and they had this harvard dating app or something and then zuckerberg came in i think zuckerberg had more of a vision of what he wanted it to be but it was certainly sketch it's a little sketchy the way that happened yeah but the fact that they're trying to do money now they're trying to do facebook bitcoin like uh i don't know how it's still relevant like when you go on facebook now it's just still crazy people screaming yeah and and and they've still kept them all on there they've kept them on there like zuckerberg's figured out a way to keep the boomers on facebook yeah just sharing recipes and and complaining about you know yeah they're just talking about cuda my aunt's like save the children and here's a recipe for banana bread my aunt's like there's tunneled under central park and i'm making a banana cream pie later so if you want the recipe i mean literally it's recipes and q drops that's my aunt's face i mean it's her head is melted i've talked to multiple people that really truly believe in the q and on stuff well some of it some of it listen some of it you gotta give him the benefit of the doubt it's like i don't even blame the q and on people as much because like if you were ignorant of everything and you never thought anything was conspiratorial and then epstein and all this stuff happen your mind would melt oh yeah and that's what happened they just i've been listening and following weird [ __ ] i mean i remember when 911 was a big thing now nobody even care like you bring that up people roll their eyes remember that things change that was a huge thing and it was like we're going to get the answers and then people just stop caring and then you move on to this and then in five years q and on people be like they'll stop caring and then it'll be another thing and eventually you just have to like kind of check out because it gets boring well you kind of wonder disinformation campaigns have existed forever where they take legitimate information and then they lump it in with nuts yes crazy [ __ ] crazy people and crazy [ __ ] and then they put it out there because it taints all the legitimate information as well 100 percent you know there's a great book uh behold the pale horse you ever read yeah william cooper or something yeah yeah yeah you read some of it and you go oh this makes sense and then you go what what a [ __ ] alien base on the moon like what's going on yeah yeah and then some of it just goes left it gets really crazy yeah it's patrice o'neal like a great point where he's like the people will be they'll then they'll say two things that make a lot of sense and then they'll put marbles up their ass that's the way he said it but it was true and he said it on o a it was like but it's hard but eventually just for your own mental health you got to check out yeah you got to just go you know what there's more to life than politics and there's just more to life than hunting this conspiracy forever because it's not none of what you think is going to happen is going to happen i think that's part of what you you just nailed it though there's more to life but there's not for some people yeah some people if they put on a [ __ ] maga hat and they you know they have [ __ ] uh liberals with a line through it and they go out there and they [ __ ] yeah that's it and they get to the rally i was i was out there in the desert they had all these women and they're in you know mercedes like beautiful day not as hot as it usually is women in like top-down mercedes you'd think like on a day like that you just go out take a drive put an album on go take a drive yeah up the mountains beautiful instead they had these pink women for trump flags and they all met on a corner and they're all waving their flags and it's like golf people it's like like middle you know upper middle class golf people and this is their sports it was like high school spirit night i wish her well yeah [Laughter] yeah that's what it is and and it's just like the again i thank god i found comedy thank god i have something i like to do yeah because i maybe i'd be somewhere with a flag waving a flag running around that's what it is right right like i need things to do nobody has hobbies not only does nobody have hobbies where right now no one has a job that's a problem so there's like no money coming in you're desperate you're scared yeah you're blaming other people everybody else you don't know who the [ __ ] is to blame you have no idea and then there's a disease that might kill you yeah so that you you're anxious yeah you're depressed yeah your social circle has been cut dramatically dramatically and now the only thing you could do is kind of go online for 19 hours a day and get radicalized in whatever direction that's the thing that bothers me too about like whenever people talk about uh whether it's conspiracy theorists or whatever the one thing that drives me nuts is that people say we have to stop these conspiracy like when all these covid conspiracies were going around that well that's a different one right because i guess some of them could be actually responsible for people making poor choices none of those people were going to make good choices before that that's my point yeah it's like if there's people out there that are pushing ridiculous conspiracy theories like who are you worried about are you worried about it getting to you right no you're not right you're not worried about you believing it right so you think you're smarter than everybody else yeah well i think it's just people get deeply uncomfortable with the idea that they're losing control of the public sphere the public space right for so long you had these these mainstream media outlets they had real direct control i mean everything you saw everything you watched everything you read it was under the control of a relatively small amount of people and this was how it was forever right i mean this was not like an aberration this was literally how it was forever every single thing you read or saw was curated by a small group of people and now it's the wild west yeah and a lot of people don't and you're gonna get bad information you're gonna get good information you're gonna have to figure out which is which and the country is not good at doing that people are not good at doing that and so people get worried and they're like wait a minute but you can't put the genie back in the bottle well the problem is they can right and they will pandemic and all these different things yeah and the video of the bunch of doctors talking about hydroxychloroquine and z-packs and and that woman who's a witch doctor i liked her i like that witch doctor and i want to hear more about i find her opinions on on on demons [ __ ] you more interesting than kova she needs a podcast she needs a pi i don't care about hydroxychloroquine i want to know who are these demons who [ __ ] you in your sleep we should have her on you and me please if you get her me you and her would be phenomenal we could fly her and she wouldn't even wear a mask she would not wear a mask she'd fight a cop at lax where does she would be great i have no idea where where does that look where does that woman live she practices medicine in this trip mall have you seen it no it's literally like right next to it a lot of doctors are [ __ ] like a lot of doctors dude a large percentage especially in l.a well doctors are humans humans go to school they learn to be a doctor there's a lot of crazy humans you know whitney cummings said everyone she goes my doctor friend said it's a practice which means we're still practicing it's like well that's not comforting that's not what practice means that's not at all what practice means you freak but there is la there's so many you're doing and i'm like do you even have a degree did you go to medical school that kind of logic is like when people say program when to talk about tv programs they're programming you bro right they're letting you know it's that stupid like linguistic garbage what announcements yeah are you are you is there any part of you that's gonna miss los angeles oh yeah yeah i'm going to miss it sure i'm just going to miss the store i'm but i'm missing the los angeles that i don't think exists right now right when you go down melrose and you see everything boarded up and you see [ __ ] homeless encampments everywhere like i took the wife to venice yeah and i've talked about this before unfortunately sorry if you heard it before but driving by i parked at a red light you know stopped at a red light rather and there's this [ __ ] house to my left it's probably worth five million dollars and right across the street there's ten tents right so imagine you your [ __ ] kid is in your front lawn you you made it you got a beautiful house in venice well five minutes from the beach i love it you've got ten junkies camped out in front of your [ __ ] house and needles in the street like this is crazy and there's [ __ ] tents everywhere yeah i was in brentwood this morning it's chaos yeah dude you get off the 405. it's just garbage stacked up seven feet high intense [ __ ] hibachi grills out there yeah that's why yeah i mean that's why i got this house in the desert because i'm like i just want to get out and you know as soon as you get out there something happens where it gets really calm really hot and there's none of that that's why i'm moving to texas yeah yeah same thing texas is like that yeah texas is like the regular world but you wear a mask yeah and a lot of people from texas you're all upset that i'm talking about it so much and people are moving out there but i'm sorry sorry you're awesome sorry you got an awesome spot yeah it just seems like the first of all high population centers it's just this is not a time for high population centers this is letting everybody know that the whole idea of like living in manhattan this is going to be great everything's there right right yeah it was it was great here she is houston texas firepower ministries i love that whoa weapon of war what fire power where's that weapon of war give me the full image hold on a second you've got hold on back back back back i can't yeah make it there fire power ministries what is that god's battle axe and weapon of war see that i would have went right to the website but it was not working fire power ministries look at what it says there god's battle axe and weapon of war i love it i need that tattooed yeah i think i'm gonna get that on my right leg power ministries i love that ammunition ministries and weapon of war 47 ministries i'm going to put that on my heel where is she the christian resource center it's right there that sounds good fire power ministries fire power ministries prayer deliverance counseling bookstore print shop gifts i will send a limo to get you gifts and more bring you to austin we do a podcast we're going to have a good time it sounds fun it looks legit yeah look at this the whole witchcraft section hey well if you don't get a book on richcraft how are you going to learn you got to go to a witch and they might lie to you i'm all for her protecting us from witches well god's battle axe and weapon of war like imagine right now on your twitter man this is her everybody out there please listen to me i i've never asked for anything for you people i want everybody to update your twitter bio to god's battle axe and weapon of war i want everyone to do yeah i may do that it's important to show solidarity with that woman and her god's battle axe and weapon fire power firepower ministries yes god's battle axe and weapon of war profile edit profile here we go everybody's coming out of the woodwork now like you have a lot of different you know if you have if you had anything to do with medicine at all you could come out now and just you could you could build a brand yeah she's building a brand the bible verse apparently oh really yeah yeah oh really yeah you want my war club yeah maybe i should leave it alone then yeah [Laughter] she's building a brand yeah i understand what they're doing yeah hey no you got to build a brand it's just what it is not everybody could be alyssa milana some unless milana some people have to be god's weapon of war yeah battle axe battle axe and weapon of war what a crazy bible quote there's some bible quotes that make you go well they don't the people like her they don't want the light touch bible quote no they don't want to like give the old man soup or whatever you know some version of that they want like the fires will reign through your eye like that type of intense yes yes yeah yeah the apocalypse they're into that so many people just really love that vivid imagery from like book of revelation yes they want that yes that's the only part of the bible a lot of them care about yeah they just want the end they think it's coming what's going on here give me something give me some of this what is she saying you know one of us that yes we gave our life to christ but we've been living in sin right oh no we did no we believe that god exists but we've never surrendered our all to him it's unreasonable that's not reasonable but because of the case don't be afraid to give your all at christ i'd feel comfortable if she walked into a hospital waiting room and started treating me i'd feel very comfortable and then she brought that guy out and she goes now meet my uh nurse this is my head nurse you know what is interesting though is this the politicalization is that a word oh this [Music] that's de blasio's wife trying to get trying to get a response from people inside to the people nothing yeah yeah yeah you gotta wonder it's a real nightmare out there it's weird yeah it's really weird if we can stay alive it's awesome though as long as nobody love dies in this it's a good deal yeah i think if we come out on the other end which i think will be next spring i think we could go through the fall and winter it's going to be weird the election's weird like have you ever have you ever looked forward to three months less no then these three months of just intense i have intense anxiety about the election right like i'm where i'm like yeah this could be bad could go could go interestingly it could be a real mess in this country i think it'll be a mess no matter who gets in i'd be less of a massive biden i think if biden wins it'll be less of a mess and i think people will shut i'm hoping people will shut up like can people just shut up they're not gonna shut up yeah they're not gonna shut up because first of all the trump people if biden wins they're gonna be furious right and uh trump has said that like that this mail-in vote thing is gonna be right for fraud he's not maybe he's not wrong about that either i don't know enough about it but i don't know why we can't have a regular election with masks uh well i don't know why we can't entertain this scene as how you and i don't know what the [ __ ] we're talking about let's just go all in and say uh i believe it could be a fraud wait the mail in yeah i think it could be two i think they should vote online how come you could do banking because then russian trolls and chinese trolls and all the trolls and bots meanwhile you bank online no problem what what's more important you than your money nothing nothing it's a good point meanwhile they figured out how to do that let's just have a regular election six feet distancing mask spray everything down in between i mean what are we doing the phone opens up with your face right yeah mine does at least or your fingerprint why can't you use that well i just i agree with you but i don't know why we can't have a traditional regular election with masks and distancing we certainly can i think we can i think it's stupid not to especially in an election that's going to be this contentious anyway we should probably just have a regular election with masks and distancing i wonder what it's going to be like at the polls and then like if really elderly people yes you should go to nursing homes they're really elderly people and let them let them touch a computer screen like let my mother go in there and let my mother touch it because she loves trump she asked me the other day she goes can you get me a maga hat i'm like yeah yeah she's schizophrenic but she loves her she's kind of his base she does she does she goes yeah she goes um uh yeah she goes i love trump she goes he's just trying to do the right thing for the country you know i'm gonna take a picture of you in full stride she goes your aunt donna doesn't understand that donald trump's trying to save us from the people that want to hurt us i was like yeah i was like that's aunt donna always trying to let the people in to hurt us [ __ ] aunt donna everybody has one yeah so i mean that's my uh here's a question yeah who's gonna name the kid karen after all this oh god that name's out it's all right but you know timmy my name that happened to you too every [ __ ] that was being described in the 80s was like little timmy everyone everyone dude and that name is decreased and popular which is fine i don't want it i don't want a name that everyone has but everybody that was the [ __ ] name forever was like timmy what about adolf by the way not a good guy great name it's not a bad name it's a great name yeah it's a strong name wilhelm clip this and send this around it's a strong name [Laughter] wilhelm you can't use it anymore you can't use uh you can't use adolf anymore yeah but how many kids a year let's ask let's do it a poll right how many kids a year are named adolf probably nobody nobody right i want to know i want to know how many you want to talk about a social justice warrior the guy who's named adolf's got to go hard left what uh well actually well hold on what does it say i thought this was like a us article that was it say worldwide an article um europe's all in there's official records on it apparently so um official records show that only 13 children were named adolf between 2006 and 2013. follow them netflix stocks made a small comeback since then 46 children have been named adolph since then oh yeah the way germany's going there's going to be a lot of it off yeah cause they got some issues and how easy is that how how low that number is follow those 13 kids that's a great netflix documentary like you just call it 13 adolfs and you follow them and see like how they deal with how they deal with having the name of a you know a genocidal monster really but maybe you could be jengas you could name your kid jengas nobody is it genghis or jenga genghis genghis khan i like genghis genghis is fine too i've said genghis but i think you're really supposed to say jengas oh katrina caitlin hey wait a minute hold on no more caitlyn's monica monica's are out isis there's a few eyes dude have you ever gone somewhere and you see somewhat of middle eastern descent and their name is isis it's like a beautiful name isis alan's rough ellen is like an old but it's a rough one now it's a rough one now because she was running abu ghraib in the back of her show that's a rough one she's out there dancing with kristen ballen in the back there's people that are getting up on the rack like this it's so weird when you see like a lot of people saying that someone who seems so nice is not nice at all she doesn't seem nice but that's that people have a very poor judge of character she doesn't seem nice it seems forced people that are like that all the time it doesn't seem nice it's very forced and whatever you're allowed to be a [ __ ] right you're allowed to be a [ __ ] you're allowed to be nasty to people you're accomplished you're a comedian you did the whole thing what you're not allowed to do um is have a guantanamo bay situation in the backstage of your show where everybody's walking around afraid for their life and it's like abu ghraib where they're hooked up to wires and they yeah she's got dogs and hoods if an intern is late they have a hood on i don't support that that's just me yeah yeah i'm with you yeah i mean you know i wish she was best she's around for too long all these people walk away you've been famous forever walk away like eventually everybody they're just gonna figure it out now fallon's on an apology door because apology torque because of the blackface like is he well he was like he had to go around and apologize a million times for like they're going to find the thing if you don't go away you got it you got to have a good run and when you have a good run you step back and you go okay i'm still gonna do my thing but like i'm not i mean there's only a few jobs in entertainment right right so i think a lot of the cancer culture [ __ ] is probably these [ __ ] want those jobs they're like how long is this [ __ ] gonna be dancing i can dance with hillary clinton i could do the charleston with henry kissinger whatever the [ __ ] she does out there did charles do this she does she goes out there to the charleston she's got war criminals her and bush are jumping around i mean right she was buddies with bush now she's a cia agent stephen paddock and do not ask me for sources but stephen stephen paddock who's that he was the guy that shot up the vegas concert that was very tragic listen to this the only guy that saw stephen paddock alive his name is jesus compost he was a guard at mandalay bay he got interviewed nowhere else you know where he got interviewed in the beginning ellen ellen really weird and then they went on if you could find that clip they went on with a weird like diagram of how it happened and ellen's like showing the people out not like an emotional like how are you feeling how are you holding up it was a weird diagram of like and then he went to the left and to the right it was very strange to look what the hell is going on this is a daytime show which is the paddock guy and there's two guys the chubby guy is the jesus guy and now ellen is doing a doc thing of of how the shooting happened look how she's got like an antenna from someone's buick that she's popped out and she's using it as a pointer but why the hell is this happening on like a daytime show where she did this is weird where'd she get that pointer i don't know she stole it off she stole it off an intern's car why wouldn't you just use your finger like if that was you if it was your show and [ __ ] yeah wouldn't you just point yeah yeah this is also a giant uh screen behind her so they could have just put it on that screen so but she's using this thing i find it very strange i don't know why those aren't real palm trees i know that street though i know that block of beverly hills that she is how weird is that i don't know why they're doing this on a daytime talk show let's keep it running look at it she's dressed like colonel sanders not colonel sanders she's just like sergeant pepper this guy looks like a member of her staff what kind of outfit is she wearing i don't know she wears it where's those weird like militant lesbians that should tell uniform yeah but that's an odd look with all those buttons like why do you have so many wrist buttons it was given to her and langley the only reason why you have that many wrist buttons if you're looking at clothes on somebody yeah look at her look at her everyone says she looks so friendly she looks yeah she looks friendly she does look very military yeah she's a militant woman with a very expensive watch she dealt with a lot of discrimination when she came out it was very sad but then she joined the cia her house got broken into while she was at home really yeah yeah she got a dope place in montecito and said and then they broke in while she was there yeah and those people are still being tortured to this day probably they're still in an underground jail yeah she's feeding them to her staff she's like it's okay don't worry about it because you did good is that the guy the survivor he's the guy who met paddock she's holding on to him it's odd yeah she's allowed to do that because she's a woman but if there was a man holding onto a woman's arm that long it'd be rape be a real problem yeah that's for sure so weird man what a strange interview man i mean the whole situation was strange what a strange thing they never really figured out why that guy did that there was no motive he has a very little footprint online he was a chick he was in the philippines yeah he was he made a lot of money doing that jamie's just what did you do jamie knows you don't know you don't believe what do you think that's what they said well i don't know you tell me what's going on okay but you just made a noise like this is [ __ ] professional gamblers not that's a lot of professional gamblers buddy not about playing video poker is that what he does yeah that's all he did yeah he was an arms dealer no i don't know that but i just see the way i said it very definitively he was an arms dealer yeah he did have a lot of [ __ ] guns some it's just very strange and a lot of times what happens is you know just give him a check for 25 oh well good for her big ass check too like you won the lobby that's good yeah imagine if you won the lotto when they gave you a check that big and it's 25 grand by the way after taxes that's not even any money how about i put us it's like nothing like [ __ ] how about you give me some real money yeah and not eight thousand dollars when we would give people fifty thousand dollars to win fear factor yeah the government i think takes sixteen yeah that's crazy you get thirty four dude when you do your first job in comedy you have to join sag which is three thousand dollars so a lot of times you're like negative yeah you have to pay three grand to join the screen actors guild yeah and then you're fi i mean it's wild well this what they're doing right now in california taxes they're trying to retroactively tax everybody up to 16.8 percent which is hilarious yeah it's crazy you're going back to january yeah you know i know you were living here over the last seven months assuming that your tax rate was what it is and you budgeted for that but no we're going to steal your money are they going to be able to do that i don't know they're proposing they're saying 16.8 percent for top earners yep and then it's going to be high no matter what because it was 13 yeah and a lot of people will be paying 14. it's a lot of money to go to to a state that doesn't manage money well and doesn't seem to fix any of the problems especially if you're that guy that's got that multi-million dollar house in front of [ __ ] tents and you're like what am i doing yeah what am i doing i work my [ __ ] ass off 10 hours a day i come home exhausted try to spend some quality time with my family i'm dodging needles in my [ __ ] i don't know if he's spending quality time with the kid but he's still like he's like i got some hookers and coke and this is still a problem he's like they don't want to come over here and walk through tents these women are professionals yeah i don't know that that guy's coming home to his kids they're getting uber no he pays someone to watch the kids yeah but no it's it's falling apart here very quickly i wonder what's going to happen like how far can it fall apart because i would have not it can fall further okay it will fall further but machu picchu there's no one there okay that's a good point yeah man all these places it's gonna be taken over by the tick tock kids you already see it happening that's why trump's trying to ban tick-tock they're 16 years old they literally run la these 16-year-old kids they go to that steakhouse boa and they all walk around in bedazzle jackets and and there's paparazzi outside and these paparazzi their job yeah they go like as the world's burning these kids are doing this the paparazzi's job is to ask these kids like what's going on and they're kids and they're they literally have responses like a regular child would they'll be like what's going on madison and she's like i'm trying to get a car and he's like all right right and it's so sick like this is that guy's life he's got to follow around these children at least used to follow around sandra bullock now you're following around a kid who like does this there's one dude that was a comic oh he's still a comic but uh he was a tmz guy for a while and he was uh yes i know that guy met that guy good dude good looking guy he was like one of those tmz guys yeah very nice guy i meet him at the airport all the time sometimes it answers questions and sometimes like bro i get that it's tough for a fellow comment and we're talking i'm like he's like yeah i get it but but he was cool like if i told him like i'm not into it i'm so [ __ ] tired and i'm not going to comment on my friend's death like one of them was anthony bourdain yeah like right after anthony bourdain died i'm like i can't man i can't what a way to make a like i feel bad for those guys you have to camp out outside of a starbucks and interview 16 year olds you're like what's the drama this week they also know where you are somehow they're stalking these kids what do they get how do they get the flight information like that's what i wanted i don't know no one's done that to me joe i don't know i always want to know how they get the flight information i don't know i don't know what airline you're on it's weird yeah i don't know i don't know like you must have someone inside the airline they send them money or something like that they must have some sort of uh that's interesting so they they so then they show up at lax at the right time yeah not just lax like they show up when you're getting off the ls at the escalator like at [ __ ] you know the fourth terminal you know when you're in terminal four and you're coming down they're there for you they're ready wow weird see they're outside of the restaurants in beverly hills a lot of times like they're just [ __ ] people that go they know what restaurants they're going to get like if you go they want yeah or or or any of those and the food in a lot i like craigs but a lot of those beverly hills restaurants it's not good well it's a scene it's a scene yeah it's exactly what it is but the food is like you go this is horrific like if you go to nobu and malibu they don't let them on the property yeah so they're on the street yelling at you they yell at you yeah yeah yeah so there's like the parking lot yeah and then there's the restaurant are you gonna miss that stuff are you gonna miss like the no board now like the food like the sushi no no i eat meat i know i eat meat and i don't like fish you don't like food it's okay i eat it when there's no meat around yeah my dad's friend owned the steakhouse he said that he was fishing his bike because fish is perfectly good if there's no meat yeah i like meat well the good thing about fish is you could eat it all day long and no one gets mad at you if you eat meat people think you're a terrible person meanwhile there's plenty of cows and we're sucking fish out of the ocean in record numbers but the ocean's going to be drained of of sashimi yeah but no you know what no no generation before us ever worried about us so it's like i'm going to eat the sashimi and the kids can figure it out let the tick tock [ __ ] figure out how to get more salmon but there's no shortage of cattle like you can get broken isn't the problem that they fart and then it causes methane i mean i know that that was the case but then they did an actual uh a survey see if you find that they did some sort of a satellite image of the united states they found out that the large majority of methane release is coming from dumps and coming from yeah which is interesting of course it does all that food and everything's rotting and it's just going straight up well yeah all of those you know people criticize me because it's political but what's very interesting is like sugar gets away with everything yeah sugar is like a like there was a comedian who did a great joke it was baron vaughn and it was like he goes cocaine and heroin look at sugar and go [ __ ] that's the [ __ ] dude that's the real drug he's everywhere yeah i mean that's the real markets yeah so i mean sugar is just so endemic in our culture that and it's not that political and it is very addictive oh yeah really shafir did this and uh big j elkerson a few people we did this slim fast challenge for like two weeks and you read the slim fest ingredients all sugar yeah you're just drinking a chocolate milkshake yeah it just doesn't have much calories other than the sugar right and it fills you up in some weird way what do you got jamie what is that research shows removing all livestock and poultry from the u.s alone would only reduce global greenhouse gas emissions by 0.36 percent you [ __ ] just relax if you don't eat those cows they die on their own and no one gets to eat them right that's the problem yeah so you got to eat the cows yeah this idea that you're going to save the world that was something that was promoted by a lot of these [ __ ] propaganda vegan movies right that if you like greenhouse gases are all coming from that no no no look a lot of greenhouse gas is coming from shipping produce folks right it's unfortunate it's true agreed there's a lot of problems with growing things like almonds that you're using so much [ __ ] water to grow these things right you drinking almond milk what's your feeling on home i drink almond milk what you're feeling on whole milk i think raw milk is probably good for you what's wrong it doesn't bother me non-homogenized non-pasteurized where do you find that you can only get it in some stores it's kind it's kind of wrong i mean it's like yeah it's like finding dmt yeah that's what i was about to say i'm like sometimes you'll bring up a product i'm like how do you even get that i was drinking raw milk for a while because you could get it at the supermarket i think you get it at whole foods but it was good for literally like two days does it taste good it tastes great interesting it's really thick and like you drink it and it doesn't make you feel like [ __ ] like there's something about regular milk which i love like milk and cookies you give me a [ __ ] chocolate chip cookie and a cold glass of milk whoa yeah it's so good you dunk it in are you a dunker do you dunk i have dunked boa has a dessert where it's those warm cookies and they're just a little scoops no ice cream it's like uh it's a problem it's a very good real good very good thing but when you drink regular milk your stomach's like all right we can deal with it right whatever but whole milk it just kind of goes in there because it has all the enzymes it's not boiled down when your body is drinking pasteurized homogenized milk the idea is it can stay on the shelf longer it could feed more people it also lasts longer keeps people from getting sick i get it all that stuff's good but the problem is that your body doesn't know what that is like that's boiled and dead there's no enzymes in it when you drink regular milk it's like your body's like oh we know what to do with this this is raw milk this is milk it's not this pad like pasteurization exactly yeah okay yeah that's all yeah and you don't [ __ ] with almond milk well i've had it it's a little lighter than whole milk yeah not milk it's not it's nonsense it's a chalkiness well it's some [ __ ] [ __ ] where you you take almonds and then you soak them and then you get this murky water and then you drink that and lie to yourself and by the way most almond milk has sugar in it like duncan i love dunking and dad like dude almond milk it's so healthy i go yeah why don't you read how much sugar it is per serving he's like 19 grams i go yeah 19 grams that's why it tastes so good everybody lies you're drinking a vanilla milkshake well you go whitney's you go over whitney's house when he has all these weird plant-based things but they're all kind of like weird like plant-based chocolate pops and chocolate almond milk and but she's very thin because she she doesn't eat a lot of those up a lot she well that's what she does she has speed yeah it's a good point she did all of those things all of those things help you know the needles every now and then i'll call it she's got like nine needles coming in i'm like is this covered vaccination what's going on she does the nad we both do nad and reactions um but yeah i mean but the plant-based stuff never feels that healthy is she on plant-based diets is that what she's doing no she'll have meat every now and then like i'll bring her food that has meat in it and she probably eats like a wolf yeah she'll eat it i mean a lot of times i try to bring her like an eggplant parmesan or something that's like in her wheelhouse yeah yeah she's uh she's dyed her hair pink now like billy eilish when did she do this she's recently i mean she's like gone off the she's probably losing her mom we need a vaccine nicki glazer was talking about shaving her head on twitter i had to reach out to her yeah did you yes are you like [ __ ] [Laughter] right now i'm doing it in solidarity for my friend who has cancer by the way there is no friend yeah oh geez she's like going crazy yeah people are having issues she's coming on next week i texted her and i'm like you what what is what are you doing and she's she's like oh i'm going crazy she's she's in missouri with her family yeah she's living with her family while this is nikki's great man she's in love she's great she's a [ __ ] great comic she's look at whitney's hair she's so crazy yeah whitney's really when he keeps getting younger like she looks like she's 17 years old because of the adrenochrome yeah what's happening there where'd that blue [ __ ] come from what is that what is that who's this this is her assistant and he shoots things at her she knows how to stay around her assistant's hilarious yeah he's very fine together a very fun girl yeah he just like i don't know cracks eggs over her head or whatever i don't know but it's good i mean it works it's it's a fun dynamic she's having a good time yeah i she's one of those people that i go man how does whitney function without the store which is probably what a lot of people say about me right we'll also define function but i mean like yeah no of course like some of us just people assisting by shooting a potato gun at her in her backyard let's not go let's need that fix i agree man i had to get out of l.a i had to go to the desert side i couldn't handle the feeling every day that things were disintegrating minute by minute and they are yeah that was wearing on me so i said let me just go to a place where there's just 80 year olds driving golf carts yeah bob hope you just look at bob hope's house it's nice joey diaz had a really good point i think he's right he's like before you leave joe robin you gotta go down there and film that [ __ ] you're gonna show these [ __ ] they don't know they don't know yeah they don't know go down mel rose they don't know they don't know what the [ __ ] dude i listen to the episode he did with lee when they talk about dissolving the church and was like that was a great [ __ ] episode man and it was like emotional it was like because that guy along with you helped define a whole era of podcasting and comedy and everything so it's like when you hear him talk about walking away from la and why he's doing it and the family i mean it's a real like impactful thing don't tell joey yeah what's going to happen he's just going to attack one winter in new jersey and i'm going to call him up joey i bought you a house yeah green i'm gonna make sure it's real near walking distance to good food yeah yeah yeah i'm gonna buy them a house yeah yeah yeah buy them once i open up a comedy club yeah you're hardcore you're like going full i'm gone you're doing it i'm gone well i know you're gone but you're really doing that and everything [ __ ] doing everything yeah listen it's exciting i need comedy i agree also i feel like uh austin is a fantastic artistic community there's a lot of like fantastic music yeah it's the live music capital of the world food is [ __ ] sensational very good the people are cool as [ __ ] i just felt like that's a good spot 100 i mean we all need comment i'm doing a tent in long island in two weeks at governor's day they've set up a tent in the parking lot and i'm doing it because one cause like hey good for them why not good for them time to start little by little figuring out like what this is gonna look like good for them for just [ __ ] adapting you know i like that these restaurants are like if you go down venice they're like taking up the sidewalk yeah they're like we were all supposed to shoot i don't want to say what but me and a bunch of other people were supposed to shoot something for netflix uh in august in la that never happened that's so now it's like you don't know what the hell is going to happen with that yeah um i um i was going to try to do my next special uh right around the new year that was my plan and you had the garden book get all these things oh yeah i had a lot of [ __ ] booked but my plan was to make this mad run i was going to do boston gardening madison square garden i had all these theaters booked me and chappelle were doing a bunch of dates and the thing was to come into like january february just [ __ ] coming in hot and do my next special and now it's like part of me look i'm not happy that this is happening for anybody that's sick or anybody lost a business anybody but you have to be able to adapt and look at the bright side so for me what i'm thinking is right now is at the very least what i can do is use this as an opportunity to examine what i want to say in my act right examine it instead of just doing bits that i know are killing because i have a lot of bits that i know are just murdering right and i'm like okay should i do that bit how what is that is this how i feel is this real like where where do i go with this and then go go forth once the year rolls over i think around 20 21 january february that's most likely if there's a possibility of doing stand-up again that's when it's going to open up because they're talking about having some sort of a vaccine around december so well let's see but yeah yeah sure yeah i think it's gonna get to a point we're gonna get to hurt immunity a little quicker than we think well you know i was talking to uh ron funches yesterday and i was like ron what if this is it this is the this is how we live from now on you could still go to the store you could wear a mask right you could still go to a restaurant wear a mask like is this or what would we do right would we eventually just start doing stand-up again say [ __ ] it if you catch it you catch it it's a good question i don't know i i think that you can reach her immunity with this at a lower percentage than a lot of other things because we they say that we have exposure to prior previous corona viruses and that you could maybe start reaching some level herd of meaning around 20 to 30 percent as opposed to 60 percent which would mean that new york already i mean the new york kova cases are very low that's one of the reasons i'm doing that tent is because they're very low right now yeah but la's skyrocketing la's skyrocketing but no one cares like everybody's out there is skyrocketing it's the wrath of a vengeful gods i mean let's be very honest i mean do we deserve to not be no i i think it's skyrocketing because it just went across country it was just east to west everything cool kind of starts in new york then it ends up in la to get sold and get ruined and get big and get ruined so covet started in new york you know it's one here just gives you zits around everybody just uses covent filters to block yours no one cares i mean people are out in the outdoor restaurants i mean it doesn't really matter people are enjoying the restaurants the outdoor restaurants but i feel so bad for all the really good restaurants that don't have an outlet places like that i'm really i'm upset nancy silverton's ppl apl felix you like felix has an outsider oh they do oh that's wonderful they're whole outside it's fantastic that's awesome maybe i'll go there tonight they have a next door restaurant that had this whole outside area that you knocked out over there in the desert when you go to restaurant it does you eat the food you like chewing it you're like what the [ __ ] is this what kind of food today i don't know what goes on i go to like seafood restaurants after i start chewing something i'm like i don't even know what this is i've no i there's one good one called pacifica which is really good but there's a lot of restaurants out there in the desert where we go something's wrong so you just decided to go out there did you previously have experience with tom no but i was in a car and then the people the riots started so i i was in a car and the riot started and i literally instead of going back to my house because i live right off sunset an apartment right off sunset instead of going back i just got on the 10 east that's right never even been out there i just said i put the clothes on my back i said not swear to god instead of getting under 10 east what am i gonna go i look like a cop i look like a guy that should be burned alive for every sin that this country has committed right right no one would care my own parents would be like he probably did something right to deserve that so i'm like i'm getting the [ __ ] out of here because i get lit up immediately um so i just started driving under 10 east i got an airbnb i took some dude i'm like hey can i you know it was a nice everybody i just got out there and i'm like i [ __ ] love it out here it's just nice it's just quiet i know people have like vacation spots of course and then i just said to myself i'm like if la's not going to be if i'm not at the store and i'm not doing anything i can drive in to do podcasts i can easily drive in how long did it take you to get here uh under two about two and it's like a san diego all the traffic is ventura freeway have you ever thought about living down there like la jolla no no two i'm not a surfer you know what i mean you don't have to be a surfer i'm not here i came here to do stand-up comedy i came here to create things um i didn't come here to be a surfer i didn't come here to do yoga i didn't come here to join a cult i come here to do any of that i'm an east coast guy east coast is where i was born and raised like which makes sense that you're in the palm desert yeah because it should well what are you going to do i'm not i can't go move back to new york get shot in the face so i'm staying there until december till the holidays and then i'll figure out you know who knows we'll see what's happening in the world the violence rate in new york right now awesome it's a little too much it's a little too much so crazy it's a lot and um listen how are they gonna turn that back it'll be turn around dude in five years everything it's a cycle it'll it'll bottom out a little bit or or be done forever because bosnia it'll be a cycle dude in five years a bunch of rich kids will move in there just like they moved in there in 2009 they'll start doing alternative comedy dressing like [ __ ] you know [ __ ] like flappers they'll start tripping you know and they'll just and that'll be the resurgence of the city they'll they'll they'll open a bunch of new coffee houses in what used to be homeless shelters and it'll just and it's just a cycle but what needs to happen now there's going to be a lot of pain yeah there's going to be a lot of displacement of people and then i think this could be the route to the city getting cool again to maybe younger artistic people coming in architects doing cool [ __ ] reimagining public spaces you know new york needs to get shaken out of its tree a little bit and so does la that's what's happening right i just don't want to be here for it like maybe it'll get dirty and dangerous again it's going to get to the point where maybe everything won't suck times square will be like time square yeah and people that move to new york will will they'll be you know listen if you know you could get slashed on the way to the comedy show you better kill [Laughter] you better make it work you have a lot of attention you better make it work if it's safe and you and your friends are like skipping down the street you don't you don't ever feel that you know pressure where is that other song right pressure is good yeah and and i think that now you're going to get it you know we'll see where do you think you're going to wind up i don't know tex is very interesting to me that's very interesting i mean the idea of that is very interesting i put up the bat signal for everybody yeah i mean that's very interesting to me i mean i also think uh you know i do like la but i don't know what's gonna hap i do like it here i mean they're you know i don't know what i'm gonna do i may manage you know i've talked about managing logan paul's presidential campaign i could always move back to do that um we're gonna have to talk to jake though okay he's gonna be like roger clinton he's in trouble right now well there's a few guns he's not trouble she's got a few you got an arsenal he's like billy carter he's got an arsenal list silly beer yeah there's always like a roger clinton there's always a brother who you go you take you just sit down was it an arsenal thing or was it because he was he was stealing things from the mall no i think he was just walking around the mall being being what he does which is with a camera and then i think you know he left i think an ak-47 on his hot tub like leaned up against the hot tub i think somebody ratted him out and then you know did you show it on twitter or something yeah there was something on instagram or something but dude a guy like that with that kind of money i say get more weapons get up gotta buy a weapons lab you should have a back coronavirus going 24 7. get anthrax jake paul get anthrax who cares you're going to need it when la falls these are the only [ __ ] you know that are going to be able to do anything they're going to have arsenal's good point yeah man why not it's not a bad idea yeah but i don't know like la's very weird because you're you're like where do i fit in you know without stand-up comedy or like i podcast and that's good and i try to make that as funny as i can but then you look around a lot of places l.a like i don't really fit in with the actors and i'm not really one of these kids it's really like a social media guy and then i'm not one of these com these writers that you know tweet about global warming and black lives matter all day so you look you're like my community of people which was the store and the stand-up comedians are have now been like dispersed so it's like a weird like i'm like a man without a country yeah i feel like that too and i want to be adopted by one of these like someone come in here like one of these big youtubers i don't care anybody one of these guys that walk around you know like high pistes and these crazy shirts and everything just i'll be one of those guys just someone knocked on my door your own thing well i mean golf shirts and just screaming just just polos just like this just ill-fitting polos yeah ill-fitting polos for the american racist polos are a weird choice pier like why is it that that is like the only thing i wear for dorks wear you know what it is i i i've always wanted to look like i've had money and i've never looked like it and there's a type of guy that's from a lot of them live in new york or long island or boston by the way yes izod yes and they wear these [ __ ] polos and they have no [ __ ] money and that's the kind of guy that i am where it's like i always want to look but they're always sunburned and they've always got like an ill-fitting thing like the collards like these collars all [ __ ] up because i tumble dry it in the wash like an animal i look like a like a golf pro who's failed at everything his wife laughed like john daly's brother yeah yeah i mean but that's the look and when you have the look you just honor the look the izod look i remember when i was a kid i have fake eyes ons we couldn't afford uh alligator okay so what was it you have like an armadillo a [ __ ] thing that you buy from like you know some stupid departments yeah and guys would glue uh an alligator over it oh really depressing oh that's rough yeah well they would fake it they made it out but but it's so funny like you figured it out kids labels to kids are a big deal like if you have off-brand sneakers on like one summer saved up for a versace shirt and i bought this versace shirt it was like this weird mesh material that clings to your body now here's now we can imagine there were many problems with that right because versace has european cut clothes now even if i you know were a small clothes [ __ ] clothes no cut cut they're european they're for dudes with like small shoulders you know the you see dolce gabbana like they're just they're they're they're women like they're hangers right so i bought this versace shirt which was like blue and mash and it was just a night i mean i look like grover or something like cookie monster walking around and then i just spilled something on it and then i realized like designer clothes you can't ever spill anything on and ever or you have to like throw it out like those types of material it just doesn't work and i'm like oh the people that wear these don't eat or when they eat they don't eat in a way that gets things on them or when they get things dirty they just throw them throw them out get another one they're crazy yeah they're wild i've never been into fashion yeah i never have either but i have been fascinated by the whole paris fashion show runway me too it's interesting to the point where i've actually like i remember when kanye west was getting into that and you know he was making his stuff and have people wear it on runways right i almost want to be there to see what one of those things are like because i bet some of the people there are probably so preposterous yes so weird well that's like going out to dinner in l.a you see these people walk into these restaurants and it's kind of hilarious you're like these people are like a a meme i mean like they're not even real i'm like oh my god so that's what fashion week is like i think i think it's an entire business built on [ __ ] yeah it's like an entire business built on like what do you think and like buzz and all this crap like there's nothing real about it other than what's created as long as our business is kind of like that too where it's like there's no nuts and bolts and it's all pretty much like what set where's popular sentiment going how much can we affect it how much can we direct it and then there's you know eight-year-olds in pakistan that make all the clothes yes yes all these things which is sad but they need to work i mean we see what happens when you shut down a country nobody works do we want eight-year-old pakistan he's in antifa no work i wonder what's gonna happen with uh american manufacturing i wonder if there's gonna be a real shift recognizing what a huge problem is having all our medicine made in china all like there's not a single phone that's made here not a [ __ ] phone single one not a single one everybody has a phone there's millions i wonder if this makes us rethink all of that and that we gotta be more i mean that would make sense right because ninety percent of our antibiotics are made in china yeah most of our medications that's crazy that's one of the things that i thought was very interesting about trump was that he was like you know listen he's [ __ ] we're getting [ __ ] by china they're [ __ ] us he was right he was right but it's just when he's right about things those things become wrong correct because people don't like him that's what i'm saying about the politicalization whether that's word or not of hydroxychloroquine yeah when shop got the covid he took it the doctor asked him what his political leanings are he's like what he's like a lot of people don't want to take hydroxychloroquine because of trump yeah and he's like is that what i should take it was yesterday was getting nervous you think it's like a history test you're like where do you stand on imperialism so i was like wait what he was better off just coughing he was like what are you talking about yeah give me the [ __ ] medication that works that's crazy yeah there's a doctor uh what was that if any doctor says this helps anybody that doesn't want to take it to me is crazy but it's a strange one in that so many people are against it but it's like it's like hold on a second there's a uh an article what's that article that i pulled up um really recently about oh here it is the key to defeating uh covid19 already exists we need to start using it this is a doctor who is a legitimate scientist right so then they're trying to figure out like why is this person it works from doctor professor professor of epidemiology from yale school of uh public health he's not a he's not full of [ __ ] he's not full of [ __ ] he's saying listen there's real evidence to show that particularly in the early stages of this disease before it stops the virus from spreading it's an it's a malaria disease that's been used forever but a doctor in new york told me it was like the lazarus drug like people just getting up and walking out of the hot like like people literally that came in with it if they used it early enough it was really good right but then you hear these studies where people are saying no in fact more people died when they're on it like well what the [ __ ] is true what is real yeah i don't i mean that's when you just have to kind of clock out and you go let's figure it out well is it because of is it different stages of the disease where it's not effective is it different like is it old people it doesn't work on but it works on young people what are the studies how are you doing the studies who's doing the studies i mean it's it's all very difficult have you done anything different in terms of like taking care of yourself i take vitamin d how much i take vitamin d i think five thousand i use a day that's right i take vitamin d um yeah i started starting i started smoking because the cigarettes they said help oh there was an article i'm kidding i didn't know what's happening every now and then i have one one cigarette but i don't smoke i don't smoke but every now and then at night as a as a it's a relaxing thing once in a while not all the time do you smoke cigars no i should you want one right now no okay really yeah i appreciate it though i should install a whole box of them mike binding i know i don't need another habit very good just start smoking cars i don't have to smoke cigars all the time i know i i have an addictive personality so whatever i do i tend to do it a lot guess what that's the problem that's the problem that's why i got good at comedy diaz talks about it like got addicted to that you know that's the whole thing is like you end up getting addicted to something so you better make sure that it's something good but i i've been trying to do better things and you know swimming a lot working you know working out things like that well have you ever talked like when uh evolutionary biologists talk about addictive personalities and obsessive personalities obsessive behavior and they say that you're actually this is very controversial but they think some of them think that you're actually tapping into a trait that would make you get very successful at things like hunting for survival like you get obsessed at something so you you want to perfect it you want to be you're obsessed by it so you become better at it so you become more successful so you survive because you have food interesting yeah which makes sense or sure or combat or the things where you're going to be able to figure out so that's like a primary trait that a lot of us have and he gets hijacked by heroin right he gets hijacked by gambling it's hijacked by something horrible it gets hijacked by jerking off yeah wow that's what it is wow so you would have been a hunter mm-hmm yeah oh it's listen it makes 100 it does it does i mean it's just it's crazy it's like in the modern world that that trait becomes sometimes a liability well this in the modern world there's so many like the modern world is not natural every [ __ ] thing that we do is very recent everything this is they're so unnatural like every the way we said yeah yeah well what we do for a living has only been around for 100 not even 100 years right when there was the first stand-up i think it was the mafia started putting putting these nightclubs together after like vaudeville like it was started those type of acts they started putting a brick wall up yeah but i think that was you know that was it's all very recent it's it's in the last century yeah in the last 90 and guys like us would have been the mc right and it would have been like a [ __ ] go-go dancer and a guy playing drums yes yeah that's all that [ __ ] we're descendants of like uh you know tent carnivals and circuses it is crazy that one of the most prominent art forms in the world which is stand-up comedy is literally within the last 100 years yeah but a lot of it you know yeah but like that's your music poetry you have to look at the predecessor's tuesday like it was probably in the middle ages it was a court jester right so there's always been somebody goofing around and being funny sometimes they did comedic plays sometimes there there had to be a guy in the town square yeah yelling at storytellers and podcasting is like we're essentially it's it's like other than being a [ __ ] or a hooker it's like the oldest profession because we're just talking sort of but we're doing it in a new way where people are doing other things and they're getting entertained while they're doing other things like right now while you and i are yucking it up yeah there's a guy who's running around a lake right and he's out there laughing his ass off sweating and it distracts him he looks down in his watch yeah yeah yeah it's true yeah yeah but it's just it's so simple it's like we're just recording things changed a lot of that because like musicians changed too because everything would have had been a hundred percent live performance like sure if you play guitar or a harp or what file or whatever the [ __ ] it would have been well that's what i missed i miss i love podcasting and i get to do it and i but i i do miss the live oh yeah experience being in a because everything has context live yeah twitter all these things have no context when i did the uh houston improv which is the only date that i did over the last uh few months it was like i felt like i was getting away with something i was like right and then i realized i kind of have like almost like a low-key depression right i'm not doing stand-up it's not bad it's not but it's like right this is what it is and this is i i hate to tell you all you folks out there regular people who do not kill if you do not go on stage and kill you do not know what that feels like it's a high it is not just a high yeah it is one of the biggest highs in all shows it's a life affirmation when you and i would do the main room at the [ __ ] store and you get off stage and murder it's great and like you would hand it off to me and nothing's better oh my god nothing's better it's like the feeling and there's a feeling that i remember like going on stage like when someone was coming off like they would introduce you and they would just crush and you looked at their face and you got to see like there's a face of a person who just crushed right like they just and i would i would always say this like i feel bad for people who don't know what it's like to crush yeah well it's also like you look at actors and you know how fun could that be it's fun i'm sure it is but it's it can't be anywhere near as fun no can't be anyone you're as fun just in the raw visceral reaction of people like greg geraldo always used to say like it's that visceral you know feeling it's not so much it's not like you're getting love but it's like you're just this it's like this weird almost like god-like experience you're having in terms of like being able to take a room full of 300 people and bring them with you on a journey yes and take them from where they are to a place where they're hysterically laughing to chan it's like a chemical reaction to change people's i mean that's why i'm going to go do it in a tent you're giving him a drug yes like yeah you're giving him a drug yeah and i'm not gonna do a lot of those shows but i said i'll do one let me see what it's like i'm curious as to what it's like and i i've [ __ ] on them and i and i and i still may after i do it but like i want to see what it's like to just do it in in in in the circumstances it can be done right now are you going to do one with bert those driving things you were talking about that i'm not going to do i love him but i'm not going to do i don't want to entertain cars like you you sip people in a parking lot i'm cool when i start performing at dodge durango's and listen god bless him he's got a huge fan base a lot of people doing it i think kafka did it i just personally don't i feel like that's way too disconnected for me this is all personal right yeah everybody's going to figure like i love podcasting i i try to be as funny as i can he's crazy rants and that gets a little bit out that i need to get out yeah i i would rather do that than perform in front of cars yeah i don't know man i i think i'm going to maybe i'm going to think once i'll try the car thing you got to try it all once but bert's doing it all over the country he's basically on a drive-through what i love about burp was like they were like we're shutting down comedies like no we're not yeah burt's like we're not yeah he just got shoveled out there but it's also it's you know that the thing about covid it does give you an opportunity if you're a comic to sort of sit down and rethink things and also to really appreciate what it's like to do stand-up again yeah that's true like when we did that weekend in houston like i did it with uh moses and uh hinchcliffe and uh when we came back we were like man i missed that yeah my god that was fun yeah i mean i know that i'm walking into a situation where i might i might get off stage and go oh [ __ ] this forever because it's a rough you know it's going to be different it's not going to be thankful though but i'm going to be thankful we're going to have a lot of fun tickets sold immediately and like that we're putting more shows on and then it's my home i from long island right so i'm gonna have a lot of fun there with the people that come out and where i think because it's gonna be a really great place to ease back in because i'm gonna be able to do some material go off the top my head know that the crowd has a lot of shared experiences with me because we all grew up in the same place it's kind of uh training wheels to to kind of come back in and then hopefully i'm hoping by this winter we're kind of start revving up again because we can't i mean what are we gonna do well what do we do if covid is like this next august if we're all the way to next august and still like this i think it's on the road again i think it is a certain time we're gonna have to make that distinction because like at the end of the day how does the economy survive how does the country survive without these things i mean sports is a mental people need sports they need to participate like they need to watch sport like you can't take all of this away forever i mean there's all these freaks listen i get the people that the masks that are like coughing in elderly people's faces no good but on the other side you have these people that are like these weird like cat moms that are like wine drunk baking bread on instagram it's like honey we can't do this for 10 years i know you're happy because you're this weird freak that doesn't like leaving anyway people need to [ __ ] leave their homes yeah they need to leave their homes and there's not a lot of entertainment coming down the pipe either not a lot of movies being made no not a lot of ways to entertain yourself and these studios are trying to figure out ways to film these movies and and keep people safe but it's hard man yeah they're gonna quarantine everybody and put in hotels and it's difficult yeah and but that's why i think eventually you know new york uh covert rates are very low i think that it's going to blow through i think there might be a little second wave but i think eventually the viruses weaken they weaken and they disappear it happened in 1918 with the spanish flu they weaken and this will weaken yeah why does the virus weaken well you know it just i'm an epidemiologist and what you see is a lot of times the virus is just it goes into the hosts and then eventually the virus is like ah like what causes it is it the people that just runs through it's just like a picture somebody that just [ __ ] everybody that you they've just ran through they moved to the next town right you just [ __ ] everybody and then you're like what am i gonna do and then if you [ __ ] like 30 people by the time you [ __ ] the thirty first place you barely have a heart attack dust yeah you gotta have a hard one so i think this this fire's just i mean i don't know i don't know exactly how it happens but it does historically happen it's happened yeah historically i mean do you think this is a different kind of disease though i think the big problem is the bigger issue actually now is is economic even though cove is a massive issue i think the bigger issue is how are we gonna how are we gonna stop 28 million people from being evicted or foreclosed on because they couldn't go to jobs the government literally shut down the economy these people could not work so through no fault of their own they have a real problem here there's a real like housing issue not just that how about the businesses that are closed down how do you restart a business when you have no money correct what do you do how do you get going and does the government have money to give these people loans you know now get started again i mean i think they have to do something whether it's universal basic income i don't know what they're going to do but that economic issue is going to be really really massive it's so [ __ ] anxiety filled it is it's like how does this end it's a great movie in texas that's where it ends it just ends in taxes that we all have guns that we all just sit on our porches all day waiting for someone to come near us how often have you shot a gun a few times like all upstate new york i should i mean i don't have a guy i should get a guy i didn't think i'd need a gun when i moved to l.a i didn't think i'd have to sit by my i sit on my balcony with a gun you know it seemed relatively safe when i moved in people were annoying but i didn't think they were coming to kill me i didn't think they were coming in my windows to kill me but now that i've now that i'm like yeah i should get a gun yeah i think i texted you second week of quarantine i'm like i got a gun you're like yeah you're one of them yeah you're one of my liberal friends i'm not a liberal friend but i was like are you a centrist i think i believe in pedophile cults and lizard people i think that's centrist i think that's in the center i'm on the fence with lizard people but the pedophile cults are real they're all real i just don't care i don't care that's really my political option it's like i i think it's not most of it isn't real you're making a lot of it real it's not real walk away like it truly yeah like the the like people that are real activists a lot of them have like a degree like they're a lawyer or a doctor and then they use their skills to actually help people right and they give up really profitable careers to do that [ __ ] right but dude your twitter [ __ ] posturing and your virtue signaling it doesn't do anything it's fake i know it's fake and there's just more to life than red and blue and republican or democrat and all these [ __ ] are trying to kill you and they're all [ __ ] losers and they're all just i mean listen they're more capable like the all the [ __ ] that they've pulled the cia all these people they're just too good they're good they've beat me they're gonna win they're gonna win the cia is gonna beat you maybe you should join i don't know who needs to hear i'd love to but i don't know who needs to hear this but like stop investing your emotional all your emotions in your your time and energy into this thing like you would be so much better off if you just found something you enjoyed and did it right but you don't want them taking away your rights and closing in on your email account they're gonna do it anyway are they sure don't take my rights send [ __ ] matter they're gonna take them buy the gun do whatever you got to do like there there's no winning here do you believe in a well-armed militia you think that's necessary yeah but look i mean you could yeah i'm all for people having guns but a militia like it seems like more now than ever the idea of forming a militia is in people it's gonna happen it'll happen there'll be skirmishes there'll be violence in the street but it's like that's what i was most worried about with portland and seattle yeah at the end of the day you know i mean i don't know you know this country's not designed for massive reimagining that's sad to say i can say it i'm a comedian it is what it is but the reality is it's just not it's going to disintegrate like everything else that's ever [ __ ] existed on the planet and you just hope that it the plane lands slowly and doesn't nose dive into the ground but the the best days are over here the bright like the the hopeful you know we're going to the moon that's that's done really you you don't think so i think we could be in a little bit of a blip when we make a nice resurgence and in a year and a half from now everything's looking good i don't know i think we just head into a dystopian insane kind of like tech world where we just all live on compute like reality barely exists no it's a real problem it's a dystopian world we're heading into well the real problem is if everything goes into like a ready player one type situation where whatever they can manufacture on a computer with artificial reality is more interesting that's going to happen and listen most p here's the problem most people don't care they don't want these rights they actually don't you like them because you're like a successful person most people don't give a [ __ ] about their rights they want pizza they want chicken wings they want [ __ ] soda they want cheap credit they want to go on a cruise once a year they don't give a [ __ ] about their rights they don't care they want netflix and they want you know garlic knots and that's the that's what it is and you could pretend like america's just not a country like freedom loving there's a few of those people most people are just like hey whatever and they're the happiest people a lot of those people i'm talking about are actually the happier people they're not trying to build an empire they're not trying to succeed they just enjoy like putting something warm and doughy in their mouth vegging out and [ __ ] waking up the next day and go [ __ ] i'm here again and and they're the happiest people they like to get drunk and go boating that's it they like to get [ __ ] up and go out on the lake go out on the lake and get railed up and yeah and it's fun what are you gonna sit around all day worry about what darpa's doing it's like the [ __ ] kind of life is that a burger it's over i mean enjoy it it's the end the end's not that bad as ends go as things as ends go this end happens to be hilarious and there's still food in the food stores yeah that's a good point as of right now i like your optimism this is a good end it's not a bad end it's not the worst end i want to see what happens when joe biden gets into office i want to sleep a lot he'll nap i don't see what the speeches are like when he forgets what he's talking about he's gonna have no clue kamala he'll run for return live for he'll he'll he'll live for a term he'll it's kamala and if you pronounce it wrong you're racist i call her k-dog no she she's gonna run he'll he'll do one term and then she'll run i don't think he'll run for a second term he's already too old he'll he'll do one term she'll come in again no one will care about politics she'll be yass queening all over the place if he does run for a second term he'll be in his 80s yeah he's not going to run for a second term she'll she'll run she knows that that's what she's pumped but do you think they have to think that through when they when they run for president like if you're 78 and you're barely hanging on now it's probably unspoken but i think that that's probably i think why he picked her is because she's everybody's been vital yeah she everybody's kind of comfortable with her she's a centrist she's a cop right she doesn't care she'll put you right in jail she'll put the cuffs on you the government the larger power centers are very happy with her that she'll throw him in the vans she'll brand ya thank you so much she runs who's her vp god only knows i mean someone else that shares her values which are here it is aesthetic political and a lot of people requiring all americans to wear masks three months he says for three months he was joined at briefing by his newly named running mate hmm let me hear it it's weird it's a long speech it says this i want to hear some of it i just want to hear his voice okay here it goes give me some when one arrives and what plans to be made for we talked about significantly about the racial disparities that exist and how it is uh covert 19 is affecting the different races differently and uh we talked about the continued lack of uh ppe protective equipment and uh testing capacity and the like but uh and i've put out a comprehensive plan over the last three months on each of these things but today i want to talk about one thing very straightforward doesn't have anything to do with democrats republicans or independents it has to do with a single simple proposition every single american should be wearing a mask when they're outside what for the next three months at a minimum every governor should mandate every governor should mandate mandatory mask wearing the estimates by the experts are will save over 40 000 lives in the next three months 40 000 lives that people act responsibly and uh it's not about your rights it's about your responsibilities as an american that's a bad line that's not a great line i i get what he's saying at least he got through that without stumbling he seems to be getting better they're they're injecting him with something they're just getting better yeah no legit yeah they got an alpha brain on an iv drip yeah right into his dick hole he's going slower now because remember he used to be fast and you got bro he doesn't have a stutter you know he's always had like a bit of an issue what's the thing it's like aren't we like i don't know i just it's so depressing that these people rule us but then you also go who even wants this [ __ ] job and if you if you're really talented and you don't even want that job who wants that [ __ ] job i mean look at this one she's indian she's black she doesn't know what she is she's everything best for their health their well-being and for their families that's what real leadership looks like and when joe talks about his priorities he knows and he cares about the fact that we have as a nation witnessed a hundred and sixty five thousand people who just in the last few months have died in our country we know that those individuals represent families loved ones grandparents parents sisters and brothers aunts and uncles sisters people those are all people she could have put in jail she's so upset she because we could have put handcuffs on all of those kids out there fighting wildfires they could have been working for a walmart for 10 cents an hour in the kamala harris prison program yeah you know what are you going to do it's just it's just wild that these are uh our choices trump or this crew or this uh old fella but that's what i mean it's like this is kind of the beginning of the she makes sense to me as a vice president like you know yeah get away from all the prisons she makes all the right people feel comfortable yeah she makes all the right like all the people that need uh somebody in there that will you know check the boxes check all the boxes yeah and uh who's that guy i don't like him 20 who is he i don't know what does donald trump say oh he's wearing a mask yeah we unite night in our effort defeat invisible china virus and many people say that it is patriotic to wear a face mask when you can't socially distance there is nobody more patriotic than me your favorite president yeah this is the end i mean this is the end this is out of the movie you tweeted to bill maher today what did he say he went off on bill maher oh because bill maher did that thing about it he did a eulogy for me yeah yeah he said he wouldn't he wouldn't get eulogy so he gave him trump was not happy about that oh my god let me did you see what he said that's so funny i didn't see that yeah i got it in here somewhere it's it's actually pretty funny he uh it's just funny that he spent so much time thinking about this um he goes uh his ego is the thing man that's the thing that really watched bill maher last night for the first time in a long time he's totally shot looks terrible exhausted gone and weak if there was ever a good reason for no shutdown check out this jerk he never had much going for him but whatever he did have is missing in action wow what a crazy tweet the suburban housewife will be voting for me they want safety and are thrilled that i ended long the long running program where low-income housing would invade their neighborhood biden would reinstall it in a bigger form with cory booker in charge i mean this is kind of just very race-baiting stuff you know yeah he's basically like somehow yeah i mean this is real coded stuff you know that's kind of ugly that's what they call a dog whistle yeah dog whistle is a new thing dog whistles new and a lot of the things they say dog whistles aren't they're just people are talking but when you say stuff like that where you're like invade use words like that you're like low-income housing is invading your neighborhood you're kind of like housewives we know what you're doing here yeah the housewives we know ms-13 climbing in the window low income housing you know it's you know but that's what he's this is what he's doing do you think he gets advised to say these things do you think these things are no i don't think anyone's advising him i think he's all him that's what's crazy right he's a he's a creature and a creation of all of the cultural trends that his supporters hate which are hollywood and big tech well he is a creation of those two things one of the most wild things recently was the the bubba thing with the nascar with the yeah the noose yeah like what he was saying that nascar screwing up the lowest ratings ever and uh first of all they had the problem getting rid of the flag like i mean the confederate yeah the confederate flag not only that the ratings aren't low yeah how about what he said to the fox news anchor when he when they go well uh you know who's done more for black people than me and they're like lincoln and he's like well that's debatable yeah and then she goes well we're free mr president because yeah you're free like that's wild it's just it's just wild he's a problem he's off the cuff he's not thinking enough everything about the comic con yeah it's a narcissist on a level that any no one's really ever seen that before in public life at this level and it just should like he's the worst guy in a crisis this is the worst guy you would never you wouldn't want a guy leading a boy scout troop in a hurricane during this like no this is a guy that just belittles people uh vindictive blames people he doesn't take responsibility for anything there's a smallness to him and it's all very funny yeah like it's all hilarious but when you talk about leading an organization there's probably a lot of issues there's a lot of issues yeah look at that the hair his hair is called suspect after trump hair complaints what i don't even know what that means what does that mean talking about how much water comes out of a shower head and then like dishwashers and [ __ ] and like people make fun of him for that but why didn't he shave his head he'd look great he'd be free that hair is so much of his thing dude yeah it's it's chaos it's exactly the hair is like his brain itself also shower heads you can't take a shower the water doesn't come out you want to wash your hands the water doesn't come out so what do you do you just stand there longer you take a shower longer because my hair i don't know about you but it has to be perfect perfect he says perfect because my hair i don't know about you but it has to be perfect that's madness yeah well that's what he should be focusing on right now so his hair should be focusing on the hair and delmar show bill maher looking gaunt yeah bill maher looking gaunt i mean it'll be interesting to see these debates are they going to have debates they're going to have some version i think kamala is going to be like i got this she's going to be good with pence she's pretty good and uh but him and uh biden are going to be very interesting but i don't know how many people are going to watch i mean i think a lot of people will watch depending on the format i wonder how many they'll actually have i mean they're not going to be able to be in the same room the way they used to be where remember when the hillary thing was going on where he was circling behind him absolutely creepy wild and then you remember the thing where he brought the five women to the debate to accuse bill clinton's live right now and there's 72 people watching it no this is the white house 72 likes no it can't be 72 people that means that's youtube suppressing their views this is they're about youtube this can't be periscope can't be real white house is twitter well why don't you click on it again and see if it makes 73. refresh your browser jamie's part of the problem you're part of the problem i want to hear what he's saying let's see what he's saying what's he got you know 500 000 applications coming in going all over the state nobody even knows where they came from you saw what happened in new york which was a disaster with congresswoman uh carolyn maloney it was uh it was a basic disaster it's it's a male in voting and we can give you many other locations on sites what has happened is that's part of a big negotiation that's a actually small part of a big negotiation he likes to do this yeah let's do this it's small this is his hands here's what i understand there's all the complicated stuff he brings it in yeah this and then that it's a master like he's like a master communicator but he's it's like he's not but he is it's like a weird thing i told you that was likes 12 000 people but still i just clicked on the james still 12 000 people like [ __ ] it's not exactly for sure we could go live on youtube and have 125 million yeah yeah that's so crazy i mean he is he is uh it's been a while it's very interesting i wonder about the kids that are growing up under him like the young kids that have no idea about politics except for trump like they've never had any experience with anybody else this is what they know a president is and they're going to vote for the first time when he's in office yeah this is 15 year olds or 15 when he's elected president talks and that's why a lot of those kids are going to this just tic-tac-y like dancing and nihilism and just being like yeah nothing means anything and they're right it's also i mean imagine being a kid during the formative time of your life the world gets shut down you're stuck at home and you can't even see your friends you can't go to school you got to do school over a laptop it's crazy it's weird it's crazy my kids go to school over laptops and i've sat in the room and watched and those teachers could when when no one's watching the teacher i don't care they don't give a [ __ ] right they're so bad they're so apathetic yeah some of them are great polish i said that on my podcast the other day i said abolish teachers defund and abolish is that getting a lot of press um it's impossible no i tried to start a movement it failed but i said if we're gonna let people police themselves let kids learn on their own abolish teachers okay no cops no teachers yeah what else i mean teachers have a much worse track record than cops if you look at the numbers well they don't get paid as much as cops well but still if cops were shooting as many people as teachers were failing i don't think it's that way i think that's like teacher we would have to make cops responsible for suicides too then but here's the whole thing teachers a lot of them are not doing a good job yes but a lot of kids aren't showing up but if those those are the educational suicides i know but i'm saying that if if a lot of a group if we're going to broad brush a group i like to do that if we're going to broadbrush cops let's broadbrush teachers get rid of them too okay who else should we get rid of garbage people take care of your own garbage no we need them we need them really when people don't have a job it's true how about that's where universal basic income comes from yeah get ready to get rid of cops teachers firefighters you never see a fire let's be honest i see fires all the time no you don't oh and they evacuated three times they take care of themselves the reality is you never see a fire downtown in the city these guys put the sirens on they're going to a movie they're liars sometimes they go down but they're white supremacists these firemen are white supremacists they're about the black ones multi-racial white supremacy endemic white supremacy they don't even know um yeah but i don't know i mean there's no there's there's very few good solutions with coven with this it's like we're gonna live in an imperfect world we have to decide what version of an imperfect world is sustainable all right president yeah you're the president president tim dillon what do we do next um what do we do next if you took over right now we'd have to do a universal basic income for six months we'd have to do an eviction freeze probably where's the money come from um we print it like we've printed everything else yeah but you know how much money would be involved in universal basic income for like how many millions of americans well you could also do well it's a stimulus they're doing it right now with the stimulus right i think the bigger problem is the eviction freeze you'd have to freeze evictions you've got to freeze that gotta freeze down and mortgages as well mortgages mortgages and rent yes yeah um you know i would do that i think that's the most but for how long how long your freezer for four months five months six six you know and then then you would have to kind of open back up um you know i would put all of all the resources in energy there's there's not a coordinated federal response at corona it's all state responses which i understand makes sense to a certain degree because states are dealing with different things but there's been a lack of kind of a federal i think like targeted response of like here's what we hope happens here's what we get but because i think right now people are just living without the idea of hope or the idea that something is going to get better or reopen and i think that like they need that and that needs to be on a federal level like the country needs to go hey we're going to get moving again we're going to be able to travel internationally we're going to be able to do all these things we used to do here's what needs to happen first and there doesn't seem to be a huge you know push for that kind of clarity my real fear is the thing that we were talking about earlier that businesses are not going to have enough money to reopen to reopen and that money won't be available so how do you get the economy back on track well i think it's got to bottom out probably and unfortunately you got to protect vulnerable people but the bottoming out and i don't mean bottoming out completely but the real estate values being lowered uh all of these things happening you know will if it's going to be a years long process i don't think it's immediate i think it's years and i think eventually what happens is you know you have a situation where because of economic turmoil you might have but yeah the businesses you're talking about are probably [ __ ] but those people might have a shot in three years when rents are lower and your cost of financing is is is potentially you know probably not lower but maybe if we keep the cost of financing low i mean that's the other thing interest rates are going to creep up and it's just going to it's going to cost people a lot of a lot more money to borrow money so much of the economy's run on just this cheap credit that we've had since you know obama's you know you know and shift and all those guys explain it where it's just like we're just it's a it's a credit card and we're just basically borrowing money at close to no interest and businesses are expanding and people are able to get cars and go on vacations and get mortgages when those interest rates creep up i mean it's just a perfect storm of problems jesus damn it's a lot of problems trying to end this on a happy note i mean listen three o'clock i'm trying to like let's let's wrap it up in the house here's the happiness okay it's over enjoy it it's over enjoy it it's over enjoy it meaning that it's not gonna end like crap like listen we're gonna limp through this somehow we're gonna be broken and beaten and battered but we're gonna get through it we need a war with china we need another 911 what i hope the people that run us are thinking of those things and i bet they are really yeah we need a war with china a war with china we need a false flag that gets us into a war with china but a war with china kills everybody it kills a lot of people but the rest of the people uh will open up coffee shops glow-in-the-dark coffee hey it is what it is i mean there's no good waste out of this i think we probably need a prolonged war with china jesus christ and here's the other thing before we leave can i say this yeah can i say this war with china thing oh and i don't want that but we need it it's true who's closer to get us in the war with china joe biden or trump i i think i think trump looks like it but i mean i think no matter who wins we just we're just gonna need a world champion it could be a cold war it doesn't have to be a hot war could be a cold war oh cool fun cold war cold war they build a thing we build a thing oh okay yeah we need that because the whole economy is fake we need that um here's the other thing derek chauvin needs to get epstein's in prison oh jesus and here's why they're not they're not going to convict him on murder too because there's no it's going to be a hard time proving intent with that body cam footage so what about the body cam footage well i mean i don't know if they can the body cam footage shows that this you know they're floyd in the car that he's out i mean listen everything shelvin did was disgusting and and horrible and but i don't know if you're going to be able to prove to a jury that he intended to kill this guy murder him or he was subduing um a suspect who was resisting arrest i mean he wasn't he wasn't resisting arrest not at that moment but he was like like he was like but listen when someone's resisting arrest when they stop resisting you're supposed to stop leaning your knee on everything you did was indefensible i'm just saying that's murder too then if he dies from that did he intend to kill him this is what that's the whole thing it's intent so the reality is i'm not that's crazy that's like if you stab someone but you didn't intend to kill listen i'm just saying he can't get off he can knock it off he can't get out so i agree so who is that guy that was epstein's roommate the guy with the muscles oh yeah he needs to go room with him that's right he needs to go room with him more with china the big cop with the dogs that's what needs to happen yeah these are the solutions folks you may not like them but they're the solutions tim dillon ladies and gentlemen thank you so much there's the guy he's got to kill that guy we got to move on okay and then we got to invade it looks like he's ready to go um thank you for having me i appreciate it i love you buddy i love you too thank you so much for everything always always a pleasure it's it's crazy that i walked in here like i i you know a little over a year ago and i did this podcast and i ended up moving it changed my whole [ __ ] life it was amazing well and you've done that for a lot of people so thank you it's my pleasure yeah thank you so much that's one of my proudest things one the things that makes me most happy about this podcast is that it helps people thank you so much my pleasure brother i appreciate it it's always a fun time thank you no different i love everybody thank you bye let's not go to war i want to get you in trouble at the end you

Channel: PowerfulJRE

Views: 6,604,100

Rating: 4.731741 out of 5

Keywords: Joe Rogan Experience, JRE, Joe, Rogan, podcast, MMA, comedy, stand, up, funny, Freak, Party

Id: h9XzuUXj6Gc

Length: 136min 49sec (8209 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 14 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/Lifeinstructions]

Summary (spoiler warning):

0:04 Tim is always suspected of being infected with the coronavirus (Tim: "They look at me and they go 'get him get him")

3:14 On everyone wanting to be relevant (and going from actor to activist)

7:08 Discussing conspiracies. Also a mention of 4chan (Joe: "4chan is the best place in the world for trolls")

14:02 Talking about Trump (including Scott Adams' take on Trump) and politics

18:37 Discussing covid-19 and the immune system (Joe: "Germaphobes are f...ed)

28:55 Talking about protests and rioters

39:59 Tim jokes about his mother and covid-19, and Joe laughs his ass off (not literally)

41:33 Joe "Michael Yo got a really bad case of the coronavirus" Rogan

55:29 What Joe will miss about LA and what he won't miss at all (Joe: "I'm missing the Los Angeles that I don't think exists right now")

1:01:12 Discussing the US presidential election and voting (Joe: "I have intense anxiety about the election")

1:03:41 Names you shouldn't give to your children (including Karen and Adolf) Tim on the name Adolf: "Not a good guy, great name")

1:18:10 Discussing milk, inclusing raw milk and almond milk (Joe: "It's nonsense")

1:25:02 Joe's thoughts about how covid-19 will influence his comedy (Joe: "I have a lot of bits that I know are just murdering")

1:25:55 Coping with covid-19, and why it's spreading so fast in LA

1:34:52 Tim's ecperience with designer clothes (Tim: "You can't ever spill anything on it ever")

1:41:53 Discussing the start of stand-up (Tim: "It's all very recent")

1:46:30 Covid-19's influence om stand-up comedy

1:53:16 Guns and militias

1:56:55 Discussing Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, and watching a video of Biden

1:53:16 Guns and militias

2:01:33 Talking about Trump (including his tweet about Bill Maher). Tim: "He's a creature and a creation of all of the cultural trends that his supporters hate").

2:08:10 Discussing teachers and Zoom (Tim: "Abolish teachers. Defund and abolish")

Bonus: 1:26:51 and 1:53:02 Jamie can be heard laughing in the background

Note: Freshness ratings and book recommendations for each episode can be found here

[u/Rondokur]

Joe - I don't believe in generalizations.
Tim - I love them.
Joe - I love them too.

[u/goldybear]

“Nursing homes need a good brush fire” Hahaha this guy is fucking ridiculous and I love it

[u/Bojenkins]

Tim Dillon is the Alex Jones that you feel comfortable introducing to your mom

[u/scruff91]

I can't wait for 13 Adolfs

[u/Quintum45]

Out goes Joey Diaz in comes Tim Dillion

[u/TheKnightLife]

I will not rest until Jenny Slate is in a prison that Nick Kroll's parents built.

[u/CombatWombat35]

BLUE CHEW IN THE USA!

[u/thekevinbarkin]

This is the most I’ve seen Rogan NOT stomp all over someone’s bits in ages.

So happy Tim is getting the love he deserves. I made a Patreon account a few months back just to support the guy