Joan Rivers on Jimmy Kimmel (1/24/11)

our next guest is a Bonafide comedy Legend you can see her down with her daughter Melissa in the new series Joan and Melissa Joan knows best the show premieres Tuesday night at nine o'clock on WE TV please say hello to Joan Rivers [Applause] [Music] [Applause] he was probably sexually threatened by you don't feel bad about it because I used to sing as a kid at third grade I was in Once Upon a mattress four deaf kids walked out oh no really two of them signed you suck this [Applause] how are you it's very good to see you and I saw you and you were wonderful as a Critics Choice Awards he was the thank you you were great as well thank you for saying that that's very nice terrible night I thought it was a terrible night it was kind of a stupid movie's one yeah yeah well the audience didn't seem though it was one of those deals where they forced the celebrities to come to the show to be presented with awards that they probably don't care that much about they couldn't and the ones that do win uh the The King's Speech oh does anyone seen it excuse me the king stutters who owns England Island Scotland Canada New Zealand oh the king's unhappy go [ __ ] yourself [Music] make an excellent point if you own Island would you care I stutter who cares whatever you highness you know him it's like last year with precious remember precious sure yeah that was another one a mother doesn't treat her right obviously her mother treats us a little right she certainly feeds her well yeah that's another excellent point by the way who is the star of that uh gabri Sidibe yes she's Oprah's uh lost sister passed oh well wouldn't he I'm sure she would be delighted to be Oprah's sister and a half don't you fight and then we'll go and talk what we should do it but but it's like Oprah was shocked that she has ah a half sister I was on Carson the first night 14 relatives I never met before showed up you're a lot Oprah has six billion dollars Oprah I'm your sister too look at these lemon spots Jones I think of your famous relatives I watched the first couple of episodes of your show and it's very entertaining but why are you tormenting your daughter I mean I could not you run your door it's like it's almost like the whole show has been set up as a prank on Melissa because you come to her house while she's out you redecorate her house and donate her furniture to charity without asking her her charity her furniture never mind her charity her chat and she seemed genuinely upset with you I don't know if it's one of those set up reality things but she isn't actually mad at you no no truly we wanted to do a reality show which really shows mothers and daughters and we didn't set anything up and I didn't I thought the way her hair stuck was just this so she was at I thought I'd give her a little class and taste so I got rid of all that furniture and it's very upset when she comes here and you go this is Sarah Jessica Parker's decorator like that's supposed to mean anything to her it doesn't this her couch is gone I mean it's crazy so yeah you don't care you just do it anyway and I I well we it was hard we lived together it was hard for her it seemed easy for you you just go through that family you're cursing in front of the kids so you are what else did you do to her you did oh this was crazy to me you're trying to get her to pose topless or naked naked she was often wait a second she was just she was off at 400 000 to pose naked and she turned it down and she had a mind give me a new two another 200 000 and we'll do a spread shot that's not what you would expect from Mom necessarily no but it's a look at the Kardashians and then number one on each it's a different world yeah I know but you're still her mom and not only do you want her to be topless you want it's not even for like Playboy it's for the girls gone wild yeah you want your daughter to be one of the girls gone wild I want to show a clip here and this is your daughter has she went met with the guy from Girls Gone Wild she said no I don't want to do this I don't want my children to see moms she has morals yeah she's got these annoying morals and that's and this is how you respond to that [Music] foreign [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] this is crazy the title of the show should be my mother is a maniac that should be the name of this show but we did it for eight weeks and it was a little tense towards the end and we had a couple of bad fights yeah and she went upstairs and she was doing like yoga to calm down I was so angry at her because it's so Furious so I got myself totally naked I walked in I said dude all the exercise you want [ __ ] you're still gonna end up looking like this do you like do you like having the reality show cameras around you I I don't mind it because you know I did my my DVD yeah that was great your documentary is really great yeah so I'm so used to having them around you know what I mean that it means nothing because I had 14 months of these two guys with me all the time but Melissa right away you know I'm going to the bathroom oh so what yeah potential Kardashian come on come on so I I didn't she she's much more private than I am she's having a hard time like she's she's living with the boyfriend yeah right now this was a surprise to you you showed up and the boyfriend is living there well you know you've lived with people and did your mother a mother moves in and you know the whole house at night starts to shake and you pray it's an earthquake yeah that's going to be a little bit it's so awful yeah and so and how long have you been here in Lawson are you living here now I'm living here now uh but I still go back to New York three days a week it's ideal I go three days to New York and then I'm out here for fashion police every week and our show now the reality show and this is your busy season now between the Golden Globes and the Oscars yeah and all the oh like God all this and I'm fat there's soap thin they are real very very thick what's your name Victoria Beckham yes I mean like she's pregnant she said to me I'm eating for one I mean it's just she said that that's amazing you know what the hell they're saying the English people well it's uh may I say that um if you ever wanted to watch I tell you what it'll make you really feel good about your own mom watching this show because what is cruel and unusual what Joan does to Melissa the show is called Jonah Melissa Joan knows best or premieres Tuesday night at nine on WE tv Joan Rivers everyone with the sticks [Applause]

Channel: Narrative Mode

Views: 31,175

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Length: 8min 53sec (533 seconds)

Published: Sun Feb 12 2023