- ( rings )
- ( fire roars ) We're still hanging out
with the Jack black here. Super pumped about that
'cause we're huge fans. Oh, thanks, man. We wanna know your secrets. - Oh, well...
- And we want you
to know our secrets. Okay, I guess I can roll
with this game of secrets. Yes, here's
what we're gonna do. We have a stack
of conversation starters in front of us. These are all
conversation starters from conversationstartersworld.com, our favorite
conversation-starting website. Just my favorite website. Yeah, period. We also have
a stack of secrets. Now, we're going to have
a conversation about our topic, but we each are going
to have a secret. And you're trying
to kind of give clues as to what your secret is as you answer these-- as we have this conversation. You gotta hint at it. Yeah, and then when you think
you know somebody's secret, you guess it,
and if you guess it correctly, you collect their secret card, and then they have
to get a new one. And then the person
with the most secret cards at the end
wins the game. - Man.
- We can also change
the conversation at any point that we want. Any one of us can reach here
and change that. We'll put these--
Let's just-- Well, let's each take
a secret first. Let's each take a secret.
Do you want that one? I'm gonna take my s--
This'll be mine. Take this one.
Let's-- let's each look.
Okay. Okay, I've got mine. This is complex. - You got yours?
- I got mine. What is it? ( laughs ) You passed. Here we go.
Conversation. Who's your oldest friend? How did you meet them? My oldest friend
is Kyle Gass, in my band Tenacious D, and I met him on the day that his dog died. ( cackles ) It was a sad day, but it was just a cool time to make, like, an emotional
connection with someone, and then he told me
that also he was in troub--
trouble with the law. ( cackles ) - ( laughing )
- "Ha ha ha," huh? Oh, I have no idea
what your secret is. - Well...
- I'm gonna talk some more
about it later, when I think of
more things to say. You know, Rhett and I,
we've been friends
since first grade. It's funny, with all the time
we spend together, none of it happens on the court
that I frequent. ( chuckles ) The court? Well, you know,
my oldest friend uh, is a Link. "A" Link or the Link? - Me.
- There are times
when I think about going back and, you know, observing him, like, when he was a kid, but then--
then I'm like, "Nah." - Wow.
- This is a great conversation. You know, that makes me think
of a time traveler who went back in time to kill Hitler but then instead he killed a good person, like Abraham Lincoln. Ha! Ha! Are you a time traveler? And do you laugh
at inappropriate things? Yes! You guessed two in a row? You did?
You're a time traveler? That's only half. So you-- you laugh-- I laugh
at inappropriate times. Get another secret. Does that mean I win
that you took my secret? - Well, you know.
- I think you're right. I think you should keep
the secret. I'm changing the game. He gave good hints.
He deserves a secret. But I feel like we should
both get a point. - Yeah, I get a point, too.
- He's the only one that should not get a point. We both get points
and you don't get a point. But you were half right
about me. But he said
"time traveler" first. He said, "That reminds me
of a time traveler
that went back"-- Are you a time traveler? Yes, but nah. ( together )
You're a reluctant
time traveler. - Yeah.
- We both get two points! Yeah, I'm a time traveler,
but I choose not to. Oh! Okay, new secret
and new conversations. We'll let you have that one. We decided
we both get points. All right,
I still have my secret because, you know, what was the conversation? You're going early. Okay, new conversation: "What's your favorite way
to waste time?" Well, you know, I don't consider
one of my main hobbies a waste of time because it requires
a lot of skill and-- Are you a tennis player? And not many people can do it unless they're on
a court or a beach. Are you a volleyballer? - Heck no.
- Are you a professional
volleyballer? Are you a basketball player that likes to play volleyball? Don't insult me
like that, guys. A court or a beach? You guys are a racket. - You play badminton?
- You're a tennis player. - Are you a badmintoner?
- Yes. - Ah hah!
- Oh, man. So we both get a point.
This is so complicated.
I love it. What was your name again? My name's Rhett. Rhett. Sorry about that. Uh, so did you have
a favorite way to waste time? Did you say it already? ( grunting ) What was your name again? - Rhett.
- Rhett, Rhett. Did you say you did have
a way-- a favorite-- ooh. Got an itchy butt? I like furniture shopping. It's one of my
favorite things to do. - I'm very fond of furniture.
- What was your name again? Rhett. Are you a guy that
needs-- that keeps forgetting
people's names? - Close.
- ( laughter ) - Um...
- Hey, do you guys wanna-- So you were playing--
was it tennis? - It was badminton.
- Right, right, right,
badminton. - But I--
- Do you have bad
short-term memory? Yes! Oh! - Yes, yes, yes.
- Two points for each of them. Short-term memory loss. Uh, shoot. Get yourself a new secret. You want
a new conversation starter? You got your secret. Yeah, let's get a new
conversation starter. What three words
best describe you? Hmm. The three words
that describe me best are "'Access Hollywood'
addict." Zuh. Do you love Mario Lopez? ( laughter ) Who doesn't?
Yes! - That was good, wasn't it?
- Dang. What was the conversation
starter? Four points, three points,
three points. The conversation starter
is "What three words
best describe you?" Oh, right.
Three words that-- Dude, um, all I can think of
is itchy butt. There must be
something else. Oh, you've got
an uncomfortable chair. - Yes.
- Yes. Get a new secret. My three-- the three words
that best describe me are "zany," uh, "genuine"... Like the singer? And "Tell it to
the spaceman!" Tell it to the space man. Well, anyway, it's like I always say, "If it ain't butter,
don't try to spread it." ( laughter ) Are you a guy
who uses bad analogies? - Are you--
- Close-ish, but like I always say, "If it ain't spicy,
don't try... the tomatoes." Are you a guy
who has lots of sayings? I-- uh, yeah-- Are you a f--
Are you a guy who You have
a lot of catchphrases. So hard. Yeah, I'm always trying
to create new catchphrases. - Yeah!
- You got a whole list of them. - I'm gonna take that.
- This is tough. What am I? I tell you, the three words
that best describe me are-- - Yeah, Matt Lauer, tell me.
- Immortal, doing better, and, uh... man, you got a nice neck. Ooh...
( pats table )
But you know what? I'm better than that.
I'm better than that. I'm better than that. I used to be not
better than that, but now I'm better than that. - Man, let me...
- You're really envious
of necks. Let me get in there
and just... Let me just get
in there and just... I have no clue what Katie Couric
is doing over there. - Whoa.
- I'm sorry, man.
I'm sorry. Oh, you're a vampire. You're-- you're a cannibal. - But--
- You like to eat flesh. I'm a vampire,
but what kind? Are you
a neck-obsessed vampire? I go to a meeting. - You're a recovering vampire.
- Yes, I'm a recovering vampire. Okay, let's see
how many secrets we have. All right, you've got
six points.
You've got six points. I've got four points.
You guys tied. We're tied, Jack,
and the winner gets - a special secret.
- A big ol' secret! We're gonna have
to share this, buddy. Oh, man, Link, if you just had
two more secrets, we would've opened
a portal to Hell. - Look at that.
- ( laughter ) All right, well, perhaps
some secrets are best kept
hidden, Jack. - Yes.
- Thanks for letting us in on all of
the weirdest secrets. - It was, uh...
- Before we started, and afterward,
when we hang out more, and you just tell us
all type of secrets. And I'm gonna spill
another secret. "Jumanji:
Welcome to the Jungle" is in theaters today. Keep watching to find out if this year's hottest
toys are fun for Daddy. Yeah. Link:<i> Get a whiff of this:</i> <i> our brand new fragrance,</i> <i> Mythical No. 9,</i> <i> available at mythical.store</i> <i> for guys and gals.</i>
This is old, you got my hopes up for a new jack black episode lol