Is Kamala A Garden Tool? | Flagrant 2 with Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh

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Aakash won the fashion show by far 🔥💯Schulzy really looked like a scare crow 🤣

👍︎︎ 5 👤︎︎ u/YoungProdigyNBA 📅︎︎ Aug 19 2020 🗫︎ replies

Hilarious episode

👍︎︎ 3 👤︎︎ u/Snoo44214 📅︎︎ Aug 19 2020 🗫︎ replies

Can someone tell me the name of those timbs?

👍︎︎ 1 👤︎︎ u/Future-Instruction79 📅︎︎ Aug 19 2020 🗫︎ replies

They need to frame those Timbs

👍︎︎ 1 👤︎︎ u/Bananahammockbruh 📅︎︎ Aug 19 2020 🗫︎ replies

Yo why did Akash throw in the joke that Andrew didn’t come to his wedding?

Was it a joke or Andrew actually hoe and not go the wedding?

👍︎︎ 1 👤︎︎ u/yunggodxerxes 📅︎︎ Aug 19 2020 🗫︎ replies
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[Applause] what's up everybody welcome to another episode of flagrant two uh i'm schulte i'm here at akash we got alex media mark gagnon in the building um yo let's get to the bottom of it uh first of all obviously you see we're swagged out we got the drip dripping and uh we'll get to that later we're gonna have flagrant fashion show today you know came through killing it alex [ __ ] up didn't even bring an outfit he had one job to do so mark didn't bring [ __ ] i was getting to him though oh okay i was getting into that okay i think mark loki has like a sleeper thing that he's about to bust off on i really do you said he didn't bring anything he laughed at you like you're a real [ __ ] idiot yeah the least effort thing he could bring it's like oh [ __ ] he saw your text this morning so let me just grab something right that could be it yeah or there could be something else that we don't know about and i'm not gonna allow i'm not gonna allow him to have the least expectations and over deliver so i don't want everybody to go i brought nothing that's the thing i know what he's trying to do he's trying to make it seem like obviously the okie doke this rope-a-dope this is the rope-a-dope akash and i went above and beyond i'm just waiting the [ __ ] out every yeah akka is actually killing it i don't know what it is but you're absolutely killing it like there's a circus that's missing its leader right now where's barnum and bailey dude hey look at this [ __ ] you're killing it swag you can't show the tails killing it um yeah so we'll get to that flaring fashion show a little bit i know [ __ ] are listening to the to the audio right now got no clue what's going on and you won't later when we talk about it but let's start the beginning of the episode with a very important question which is what makes a girl a hoe right because rush limbaugh if you guys don't know who rush limbaugh is do you know who wrestling i do but that's because i'm old that's right so for you youngans rush limbaugh is like um i don't know like howard stern without robin he's been trying to get me on his show for a minute by the way really oh yeah dude like i was getting a new email like every week from like his producers and [ __ ] like that but he's this huge big like conservative uh talk radio guy right yeah and wild boy yeah wild boy he hasn't tried to get me on the show at all and it's probably because you're more famous but also other things what do you think of this i don't know maybe just [ __ ] outfit that's terrifying son he would yo he sees bombs in his outfit for sure 100 sure okay so um right now we have a situation where he's i believe it could be taken out of context i don't know how you would do that called kamala harris a ho yeah and there's a lot of pushback to this because she's obviously a vp nomination um and i don't know famous and i don't know whatever accomplish it accomplish etc but what constitutes as a whole let's talk um i and listen listen kamala harris yeah did [ __ ] mayor willie brown how old was she 29. how was he 60 while he was married now i'm not calling kamal harris a hoe but would mrs willie brown refer to kamala harris as a whole in that situation i gotta see miss willie brown first so how good she looks is dependent on her hodom wow al wow you are such a chauvinist apparently bill clinton called willie brown slick willie brown and if bill clinton is calling you a man then you'd definitely be [ __ ] down these big bill calling you slick it's like willy yeah that slick willy that means kamala got the what yeah if he's slicker than bills really come on now bill wasn't quick enough that's a problem i mean he would mass like let's try that's dry willy bill bro nah he's skating on them fc in charges i guess can we can we blame can we blame them are we gonna look at al are we gonna look at a black woman woman and say she deserves to get cheated on is that what you're saying right now wow can we just be grateful the mayor of san francisco is into women can we just do that can we just take a moment and reflect on that for a second yeah we need more minorities in office that's it he was trying to get them to suck his dick but it's okay at least they're in the room at least they're in the office now apparently he gave he did the right thing he gave his side piece you know a better life he gave her some opportunity some jobs maybe she deserved them maybe she earned them so maybe she earned him off her skill and then also was playing with the slick willie right but if you're the wife or any of the wives friends are you referring to her as a whole back then we don't gotta talk about current kamala maybe it's just short maybe hoe was just short for home wrecker which is kind of definitionally correct if their marriage split up because of this affair i don't know where you got the record but i like the home part you got home now i know you know how to spell better than i do but the home i got you home wrecker okay that's a home record got you okay okay so it's a possibility i'm just saying is it that far off is it that crazy to call her a whole now maybe but back in the day you could throw hoe around yeah no he said it like two days ago but yeah yeah i'm with you he called the ticket joe and the ho which is kind of boris for a while wait the ticket he joe biden oh i thought you were talking about yourself yeah democratic presidential ticket joe and the hope right and then he said she slept her way to the top that's basically a hoe he like says she's a hoe yeah now you can't take away from her accomplishments but here's what i will say yeah monica lewinsky we all understand and we give a pass to her now because and i'm not going to debate her but the point is she was like 21 22 she was with the president of the united states she was young and impressionable and this is a very powerful man and so it's much more on bill yeah i can't apply the same [ __ ] to a 29 year old woman sleeping with the [ __ ] mayor you're 29. i don't know if he was mayor back then maybe we could do a little double check but definitely ain't no president that's true so the same rules that we for we understand monica lewinsky forgive her for we can't give that forgiveness to comment is it crazy to throw the whole now maybe al absolutely so it's crazy yes it's crazy what back in the day you she couldn't be like yo i had a whole face i was just smoking back in the day but you can't call her a hoe now that's what i'm saying so that's why it's crazy when is this what is the statute of limitations yo when does your hole wear off that's a great question the moment you stop being home not a hoe because i'm no longer at home so the second you stop being a hoe you're not hoe now now now let's talk about it okay let's talk about it where were you going with that mark where are you going no now i'm just thinking like anytime you stop doing something does that mean you're not the thing anymore exactly so the second you stop [ __ ] guys al are you no longer gay yeah the second you stop [ __ ] guys like the second you just pull it out the second your dick is removed from the rectum yeah you're no longer getting your [ __ ] vag yeah you're no longer gay i don't know dude sometimes it's in you which you are okay what about your girl so that your girl cheats on you the second she stops cheating you she's no longer a hoe no you could carry that hotel because cheating infidelity now you're adding lighters to you break up you won't call her a hoe you don't have to stay together she betrayed your trust i get that relationship is fragile any girl cheated on me as a whole for her life for her whole life al operates her whole life her whole life she's a hoe you you believe otherwise yeah she hops off the dick and all of a sudden she's saint again i mean i think a whole lot of these changes there are some marriages that get past the cheating they get past it but you still look at that whole like nah you can't you can't you don't look at this chin [ __ ] like how could she cheat [ __ ] yeah but eventually you gotta erase it you gotta erase the whole eventually the whole goes yo can i tell y'all something that's mad vulnerable and i should not share at all no you ever like [ __ ] a girl so good her legs shake after sex yeah every time yes sir no but you know what i'm talking about like why they like orgasm so many times their leg shake bro i [ __ ] my girl the other day bro my legs are shaking so that she felt that pathetic son yo i'm literally laying there covered in my own [ __ ] because i just came on my belly and my legs are wobbling a little bit did you try to get up i don't know what was happening i think it was the altitude so i was weird [ __ ] happened when i was having sex up in aspen bro i started tearing because i was so tired after this [ __ ] this bro not even after sex was during the sex you know when you're so exhausted you cry a little no no well i do and nope she was riding me and that is happening right now so it's the altitude it's 11 000 square feet or something so but i literally started tearing and i had to go like this you need to go back over to get your dick back so say well you need to go back i left it over there did your girl say some [ __ ] to you while your legs were shaking like yeah i did that yeah y'all know how little i have sex that y'all assumed it was the same time having sex with both of those yeah that's a traumatic moment bro no no it was traumatic but it could be altitude because when you bake at a higher altitude you have to change the baking recipe exactly what the [ __ ] does that mean i don't even see how that fries just wanted to throw out a little fact he knows about altitude accept it [Laughter] discussion i didn't let me finish it up the word hope i just don't think it's the craziest thing to say because i think there's so many women out here that are defending kamal and saying that this guy's an [ __ ] for calling her a hope when they have called far lesser women hoes right you call the kardashians hoes they [ __ ] four people that they're all in relationships with how are they all hoes every kardashian is a whole they just [ __ ] people they're in relationships with but kamala [ __ ] a merry man and all of a sudden oh my god how could you dare speak about a woman of color like this kardashians are women of color they are bro that's my brown eyed girl what are they called brown skin girls bro it's about brown skins yeah what brown sugar you talking about the car no but real talk and all these dudes out here calling every girl a hoe that walks past them when they holler and they don't lit and the girl doesn't listen yeah every girl's a hoe but now rush limbaugh says that about kamala and all of a sudden they're like oh my god how could you ever speak about women like that all i'm trying to say is y'all a bunch of [ __ ] hypocrites i'm not calling kamala a hoe but she [ __ ] my man yeah what but if she [ __ ] my man while we was married yo yeah anybody breaks up my marriage that's a [ __ ] i hate that [ __ ] for life i'm calling them every name in the book yo that's true what if they had the jada will situation oh open yeah i don't think they're thinking the mayor's gonna have an open relationship in san francisco aids riddled san francisco is gonna have an open relationship bro that's a good answer come on that [ __ ] was riddled bro but back then didn't they think that was just a gay drug say what a gay disease gay virus yeah it used to be called grid which is like gay something immuno disease or some [ __ ] like that it was it was like gay in it hiv used to be all grit i don't know really yeah is everybody just trying to top each other's gateness right now son yeah so much about you he knows about bacon you crying that's all that is you tear i was coming out of my eyes bro that's it dog it's salty it's the same [ __ ] get your [ __ ] relationships right real talk start making more love yo y'all making lust start making more love that's good all right crying doing the stinky leg in bed so that's what i started doing to make it look like my legs were shaking candy sweet good he's gone y'all bunch of hoes y'all a bunch of hoes too nah man i got a fact that being a hoe you're not a hoe okay i got a fact check on some of the kamala [ __ ] okay go so she dated san francisco mayor and state assembly speaker willie brown for a period of time in 94-95 but technically he was estranged from his wife for over a decade oh come on son they broke up this is according to this that apparently that sounds like some whole [ __ ] to me that sounds like someone yeah i'm so tired of you fact checking yeah that's what i'm talking about you can't just throw any compliments while we're on like a roll yeah yeah we're all making fun of you yeah your jacket looks stupid no but you know it's fire we did this [ __ ] last that's what we got to do we got to start every episode with no facts in the beginning right remember the last episode what was it we were talking about kamala again i think no it was was it comma there was something specific jamaican great granddad or something john brown or some [ __ ] like that i don't know but then we found out he was actually white anyway point is we got to start the show with no facts all feelings we go no facts all feelings and mark does a fact check and ruins all the fun but actually makes it more fun okay that's the segment it's called no facts no no facts all feelings no facts all feelings it's the anti-ben shapiro segment well facts don't care about your fans shut up i hate that a little thanks i don't care about your feelings that is some smug [ __ ] to say yeah facts don't care about anything they're not a sentient being what are you talking about like facts don't have any feelings but we as human beings do if we're not autistic so yes kamal is not a hoe turns out kamal is not a hook this is alleged i don't know necessarily there's dubiousness about it all facts yo slick willie was getting it in shout out to slicker shout out to the stream i'm gonna be honest though i do feel like a lot of guys will try to [ __ ] other girls and be like that are marrying me like nah we're like separated it's just not official ah so i believe it i think cause 10 years a long time but they're definitely do is you try to [ __ ] girls while they're married and be like nah we're not divorced yet but like my wife and i don't talk we don't live together blah blah blah she also was 29 dating a 60 year old that's crazy dawg nothing wrong with that that's ghost there's nothing wrong with that [ __ ] yeah 30 years bro that's true old ass [ __ ] at that point 29 years old hard-boiled egg having ass lady you really think that you really think she can't date a guy 60 oh wow there are a 130 year old [ __ ] crying right now listening to hell you didn't have to call them [ __ ] out that was a little extra you know oh and that was actually you just called all these he said was a [ __ ] i didn't call all women [ __ ] i didn't even call kamala [ __ ] you just did that you [ __ ] piece of [ __ ] come on yo you know what you're right i'm sorry sorry guys protect women i'm sorry you're right about it yo but for real man honestly i'm glad we got to the bottom of that what was the bottom of it so is she not up so he was still married at the time but apparently they were strange but we don't really know that for sure sometimes divorce is tricky man i'll give slick willy that divorce is a very tricky thing and it's easier just to stay separated and you obviously going to go hand out the pipe because people will you bro that's why i slick willie so i understand that and also if kamala is [ __ ] people she works with and that makes her a hoe a lot of y'all listening right now are hosts a lot of y'all are [ __ ] a lot of apparently he like placed her in a couple different committees and positions we got to stop judging women who do that [ __ ] that's ambitious yeah i mean like an ambitious girl yo that's a good point like what about all these dudes that aren't [ __ ] other dudes to get [ __ ] but they're like just being like [ __ ] hang out like you're just emotionally connecting with somebody emotionally blowing this guy all the time dick loser what the [ __ ] you're doing all this like buddy buddy [ __ ] yeah tapping them on the back hey you watched the game last night real talk that's an emotional [ __ ] yo-ho yeah whole ass dudes out there just cause y'all not sucking dicks that y'all out there just being charming is sweet to [ __ ] how else are you supposed to get a promotion you stay after work she's staying after work she's probably working harder than you are [ __ ] she's probably working less making money the same [ __ ] think about it she's optimizing her time this is what you need a president to do oh factual yo now you're talking let's do this that's the type of diplomacy i want yo put the d in diplomacy all right let's solve this nuclear war israel palestine get over here yeah yeah you got some missiles to deactivate i'm just saying why are you judging women bro this is al goes on one boat ride he got one little yacht ride together one little video and all of a sudden he called all women hoes you're not in the hypnotized video yeah i erased that whole holism you know you could erase you could mi be a hoe yeah oh [ __ ] that is how you do that yeah how do you do it they take the dick out boom they're not hoes no more the moment they take the texture the girls are just taking their dick out of you take it out right right oh take your dick out a dick any dick yeah there's a general thing i thought you had a specific ability to make a girl not a hoe i thought there was some like christening thing that you had they got to do it they have to do it themselves yeah i got you you know i didn't calculate with this hat is the back of it hitting the chair okay so i had to share that with you thanks for that information you know what i thought that was going to slap once i give them this information the podcast to another [ __ ] level bro with this the [ __ ] hat in the back of the chair [ __ ] that's what everybody was thinking at home that's what everybody thinking at home dog real talk okay so we offer this i think that we've come to some conclusion yeah yeah it's a pro women podcast absolutely son are we not feminists i honestly i realize i am a feminist yo we are such feminists we might be feminazis yo honestly we might be we might be explain it to me so i can agree i don't know i don't know what that is but isn't that something that like people always say we want to [ __ ] shaman that's for sure we we're trying to call out the people that are calling out kamala yeah if you call all these other girls hoes but you're not going to call out kamala keep the same energy you know what i mean yeah you know what i mean i do that's what i'm talking about every time a girl [ __ ] a dude that's successful famous she a hoe and if she gets a job out of it i support sex work also if there were more successful famous women we will [ __ ] them that's the only reason why we're not [ __ ] them you don't think somebody would slide some dick up barbara corker corcoran let me tell you something so if barbara corcoran got a three bedroom for your boy in dumbo my girl gonna be about that [ __ ] you better put on a condom get us this condom i'm not doing this 2300 square feet barbara corcoran and i can fill up any square footage you need if you know what i'm saying wink wink cause i'll park my [ __ ] in your garage easy money yo easy money that's all i'm saying ladies if you listen i know a lot of women out here no this is important a lot of women out here feeling judged because men aren't [ __ ] them to get ahead in life the problem is y'all not ahead y'all busy giving it y'all not ahead we need y'all to get ahead yeah okay there's three oprah's oprah who the other two oprah's judge judy oh yeah judy judy oprah bro that's the authentic oprah that's all that that's judy oprah judge judy you see another [ __ ] how [ __ ] up is that the [ __ ] is on zara that's a [ __ ] well it was a guy but she divorced him i think she gets half a czar you know that's how these women make billions yeah yeah yeah amazon's wife what's jeff babe oh what's bezos which is called the chef basil's the next bezos no i [ __ ] with mackenzie bezos why what's she doing is she giving moses to her we don't care and she gets it wait she does yeah because she gets she's giving moser money to charity she knows she charity yeah she's chair gets it i mean like that's how i got my money definitely giving [ __ ] to nobody ever you know that's the [ __ ] you know how people say the buck stops with me not in her case the buck keeps bucking yeah she manages it forward okay so but that is a real thing if ladies you get into these power positions which is what we want you get into these power positions right we would love to [ __ ] you and take advantage of that power you already have we would love that opportunity it just so happens that we can't think anything y'all um the other thing is that girls aren't gonna [ __ ] down say what i don't think girls like well well we had a discussion about that what girl the assumption was all the way back in the day the assumption was always girls don't [ __ ] down so the more successful women get the harder it is for them evolutionary evolutionary yes but here's the thing women are [ __ ] up because [ __ ] up provides security yes at the end of the day like let's make like the most biological arguments right [ __ ] up this guy is gonna have enough money to take care of you while you're incapacitated for nine months while you're being pregnant and raise the kids and raising the kids survive it's it is the smart decision calling a girl hope for that is is is [ __ ] up but my opinion is [ __ ] up the biological decision isn't even smart it's what we're programmed to do and you know what's interesting is like you always hear these dudes go like well men cheat because it's our biology and then when women [ __ ] successful people they're like [ __ ] yeah it's the same biology bro same biology yeah so here's the thing we've noticed that once girls get security they got the same sexual appetite as us once girls like guaranteed megan uh ex bezos guaranteed x bezos the side dick she getting right now is the guy that works on the grounds of her property oh yeah that fine ass dude fine ass dude yeah man package is still getting delivered jeff i'm saying oh and this one's in his prime all right so the point is when these women end up getting that security life security that they don't have to worry about now their sexual appetite reflects us they [ __ ] the closest thing around they [ __ ] the easiest thing to [ __ ] guys we don't have standards a lot of times because it's like yo what is the easiest thing to take down what's the monica lewinsky you're there ah [ __ ] yeah he could have whatever girl but there's a cost if bill clinton wants to go and find some victoria's secret model of [ __ ] yeah oh she's gonna talk yada yada it ended up happening anyway but still and you see this happen so now we can look at our sexual appetites as a function of security men we have security sometimes men don't have security and they will [ __ ] for it madonna 62 got 25 year old boyfriend does she not yeah guaranteed that dude was not secure guarantee that dude has not come from money guaranteed dude did not have a great job guaranteed dude is living off of her in some way shape or form i'm much more embarrassed by that dude than i am if it's 25 year old girl 62 year old man ooh going that was going insane no because that again i'm looking at it from a bio a biological standpoint of like dog your whole goal as a man is to become a provider so you can be more attractive to other women if you're [ __ ] for the security that's like i'll be honest i find it like a biologically not masculine that's some [ __ ] [ __ ] yeah it's evolutionarily tapping out you tapping out the game like you supposed to provide for yourself you're the provider what you were born to do is provide in an evolutionary sense that's what men do you provide so you can get you know the best woman or whatever and pass on the strongest genes and you're just tapping out of that he might be playing a long game get with old [ __ ] she dies you inherit her i think that's [ __ ] now he's i think that's i judge that much more than i judge the girl anna nicole smith i feel you but i think dudes are playing the girls again it's the same thing keep that same energy that's biological i get why a woman does that that's every species is get the most attractive mate and not just attractive physically like who can provide the best life for me and my office security yes is security bro so i get biologically anna nicole smith partic if they didn't have kids maybe not as much but if they had kids i'd get it on an evolutionary level i understand that's what we're driven to do a guy's not driven to do that in most any species yo you know what maybe rich dudes find security in gold diggers because they know that the girl is attracted to gold so all they have to do is to continue making goals give them some [ __ ] to dig up exact give them a [ __ ] to dig and as long as they can still dig they will be there they will be loyal they will be secure right yeah whereas a dude that is only good at making gold and not really good at like building emotional connections with people might be insecure about a relationship with a woman who actually wants an emotional connection with them because they might not feel like they're interesting enough to be loved for just themselves so it's easier to have that relationship okay i make the gold this [ __ ] loves the gold she's not gonna leave me she's gonna take care of my kids i feel secure also evolutionarily i get a guy getting a girl like that because that's what we covered we covet the girl like attractiveness pretty much across every country from this is 20 years ago when i was in college and i really study but like it's who gives me the best kids what's like the mo the wide hips the hourglass figure the big breasts help nourish kids the wide hips make childbirth easier that's what we're attracted to like she's the gold digging wife that's what i'm evolutionarily drawn to yo y'all suck titties do y'all do that yeah what yo do y'all suck it do you all suck do you suck it uh not suck but lick you don't suck too much do you suck it sound like a pacifier yo for real though we gotta talk about sucking titties bro you not out there sucking out why do you not do that son yeah weird also hold on y'all never suck at titty and you get one of your girls little titty hairs in your mouth and you'd be sucking extra heart anyways yeah y'all never do that in floss why you suck at chinese too descriptive i'll never floss on your girl titty hair you know every once in a while if you're growing a little titty hair just mine although why do do we figure out why al's dick only goes straight like that yeah because i got a normal dick can we assess that cause some people will hit alab apparently yeah al you don't have a normal dick your dick said i got a heavy no you don't they said i got a heavy that's what that is you got a heavy so you're saying the blood weighs so much that it hangs down it can't go all the way up that's that's what they would say that's what they would say yeah yeah yeah no no you're working i don't know i think your dick is weak yeah because it can't hold it it can't hold itself up you have such a small one i'm on my back i'm straight up y'all just like on some weak laying on your belly button [ __ ] like that yeah it's not straight maybe his sperm is weighing it down because that's why you get all these girls pregnant no that's true it could be sperm density yeah but i will say this specifically about it i will say this about your dick specifically okay your dick if it doesn't go up could mean it's so thin that it doesn't it's such a thin deck uncooked pasta yes that any amount of of blood in the tiny little thin dick that you have a little baby dick it's gonna pull it it's gonna pull a little baby dick down that's all valid so for real that is something that you should be concerned about with in your dick size noodle dick i do stay away from boiling water you do [Laughter] he's not just afraid of swimming guys yo what if that's why black people didn't swim they're like not my dick's not getting hard anymore i see what it does to pasta i'm not [ __ ] around with that water bro [Laughter] what's your currency again rupee oh my god is that how they say it yeah how do you guys say rape in uh in india consent i was gonna say yes oh [ __ ] all right ready fun time [ __ ] is crazy yeah you crazy you're crazy out here bro oh boy did uh did trump say that um kamal is not from america yeah yeah yeah he didn't say that but like he like agreed he didn't he didn't say it was wrong what what do you say he floated actually that is the funniest [ __ ] to say about anybody like you're not even from here bro like because they are but there's really after that you can't all right guys we're gonna take a break real quick stand up comedy is back your boy is gonna be at good night's comedy club in raleigh north carolina we got shows thursday through saturday thursday at 8pm i believe friday and saturday at 7 15 and 9 30. you can get tickets on my website akashing.com or uh just look up goodnight's comedy on google and you can buy the tickets there and i believe andrew got a show too yeah yeah we're going to be at the stress factory in jersey this weekend and uh the shows are sold out we're not adding any more shows thank you guys so much that being said if you had gotten tickets before corona and you do not plan on coming for whatever reason let the club know because then that can you know create an opportunity for someone else who's trying to get the tickets again because we're not adding any more shows uh thank you all so much man and you know what let's pay some bills and bills listen guys stop getting hangovers i'm tired of people complaining about hangovers you see it it's a trope in every single movie television show you don't need to be hungover anymore okay you do not need to what you can do is you can do that dhm detox now what is dhm detox first of all uh it's risk-free meaning if you don't like it they'll just give your money back i know that's insane but basically what it is it's vitamin that breaks down the toxins in your body that cause you to get hung over everybody's like oh it's just water you gotta drink of water and then you're not to be hungover no wrong okay there are also toxins built up because that alcohol and what dhm does is attacks those toxins breaks them down so you are not hungover they give it you take them out little package pop a couple after your first drink you can take a few more throughout the night i'm telling you wake up in the morning beautiful peaceful lovely absolutely amazing this is what you're going to do you're going to try it risk-free okay if you don't like them they're going to give you your money back but you will so you won't and you're just going to go to no days wasted dot co slash flagrant and you're gonna get twenty percent off if you use the promo code flickr that's right twenty percent off and if you don't like it you get your money back man stop getting hung over let's get back to the show they're america's greatest import what is black people wait a minute now hold on one second hold on one second hold on one second no no no let's make the argument are black people america's greatest imports is there a better import from anywhere in black let's think about in terms of cultural significance is there any more potent and powerful culture than black american culture in terms of like it's spread around the world right now and who benefits from that man i try to make this a positive it is no but think about who benefits from that it's a positive you know benefits from that america benefit when you see little japanese kids dressing like black kids from new york or l.a doing breakdancing doing all this [ __ ] that's america that benefits from that that's colonialism in a weird way it's cultural colonialism yeah doing the acon thing and just saying like oh yeah but just ignore the whole slavery part no no no no no no no no i'm saying america i'm saying america was very lucky to get black people what listen slavery horrible slavery horrible but you have to admit that it undeniably i think this is the argument that so many black people make is like yo we built this ship for free okay right like so if we're talking about who benefited the most america benefited way more like from slave labor than any other import okay think about the main thing about like the insane the amazing amounts of money and wealth that was built off of free labor that's all i'm saying okay and like leverage this globally you took it negatively i don't know but it's still not something i'm happy about like i'm not i'm not gonna brag like oh yeah we're america's greatest import i was just making an observation i would never tell you how to feel about honestly i was just trying to defend something sign of crazy i know i think i did a pretty good job of it though and i'd be catching like zion i'd be like no that's how i meant it but for real though that is an interesting argument can you think of one other import wine mark get the [ __ ] out of yourself this is a crazier hold on now hold on mark might have something oh mark don't you whine is it better than uh import than black people first of all who whines more i ain't seen no chardonnays like white lives matter white wines [Laughter] i'm like you wine has good legs not but black people got great legs bro but generally but not only speaking not ow yeah i got the puerto ricans yeah we got puerto ricans house legs is built for merengue okay but no let's think about that no i think it's interesting okay america's greatest export go i already know it i already democracy huh democracy some might say it was imported but i'll let you rock on that you could argue that's a french import you could argue ain't nothing a french import even the fries honestly same with wine bro well well that's important i think i would have to say america's greatest export sugar there is no dessert without america america changed the world sugar change the world did we didn't we just conquer hawaii so we could have the sugar that they were already had that was one thing that we did but that's part of america and i think sugar cane existed before and was used before only in the americas did not exist in europe or any of that kind of [ __ ] sugar market i feel like india has sugarcane india have no [ __ ] sugar look at any place we were doing this the other day mark and i were sitting here we're out there and we were starting to go through desserts because we got what was the dessert uh mango stickies yeah mango sticky rice and then we're like oh it's just mango and rice and then sugar all over it and we're like oh wait a minute sugar is from where mark uh the sugar plantation the sugar plantations okay i'm gonna need a little bit more momentum hey guys no facts for a second feeling your face type of smell you look at the facts in the meantime andrew you guys are feeling so i'm trying to america has sugar cane all right okay i think india did too no india didn't have sugar cane no you didn't you didn't have sugar cane let me know when y'all want facts all right what when you're ready for facts we can go over it first we'll go to the blank guy for facts come on whoa come on this guy oh come on whoa come on oh gosh that was racial i know it it's a wild outfit that is wild is it even hindu it's indian huh indian but that's just straight up indian maybe some fusion [ __ ] well i made the point that he's got to be grateful to the british a little bit for giving him buttons but we're assuming you guys did buttons this is again feelings no facts absolutely we did buttons yeah you'll just be wrapping yourself up that's one point that's what i was saying y'all never seen the way that they dressed up you guys were mummies before the best that's just and then you try to do some cute [ __ ] where you show off your midriff even though you all got the worst mid-drifts on the planet you guys take that time that's fine y'all got the worst mid drifts because y'all either too fat or you're so skinny that you got the extended bellies what about the top drifts we got good ass top drifts yo y'all got heavy tits yo yeah for real y'all got a great top drift indians got heavy tits oh yeah great top drifts i don't look at indian girls like that out of respect for you appreciate that but like dude has got heavy tits great topics no for real ow is it true indians got heavy tits some would have had some heavies i bet you they got lots of hair on the nipples bro guarantees if you want to talk about hair you think i have these great teeth because he never got nothing stuck in his teeth you don't even brush you just put some crest on your nipple hair [Laughter] this happened from breastfeeding i just got great teeth from the womb no but for real buttons english invention you made up english you're guessing i know for a fact sugar indian invention can i tell you see yeah i was about to give that to you let me come with you have you ever [ __ ] gold finger the bond movie with the character odd job in it that has the topic nobody watching this dumb ass movie well i wanted to throw this hat at you so hard when you just said that indian indians invented sugar they did they did not invent sugar how do you think we got them sloppy ass midriffs say again how do you think we have them sloppy ass meat yeah no [ __ ] hair on it you did not invent sugar the first chemically refined sugar appeared on the scene in india and about 2500 years ago that's what i said trust the black guy no no no no yeah there we go there we go first sugar some brown and black your neck maybe how many years ago did you say hurting your feelings how many years ago 2 500. you ain't you ain't touching that exactly that's before god exists not our god your god doesn't count because it's not god no that's god yo come on bro who's god that's the god mark which one is god give us a fact jesus say what how do you think they get brown yo that is some white [ __ ] to do like yeah white people took sugar that is brown and they were like eat that's a little dangerous why is that sugar so loud turn down the music or that's what's that inside of me son we literally did that to chocolate and sugar yeah we made white chocolate we made white chocolate for no [ __ ] reasons we made white sugar for no [ __ ] reason but real keep it 100 same with bread too we made white bread yeah and what color is weeds and all of our words once you make it white it takes all the nutrients out it's all the flavors like just like white people takes all the soul out of it amber is making sense that [ __ ] is amber this [ __ ] is and we made it white for no reason y'all are racist wait a minute why did we turn everything white mark i think aesthetics i think we want it all to match aesthetics i knew that she was aesthetics yeah oh my god bro yeah we did it to sugar we did it to bray we did it too what was the other day and you're funny that aesthetics for y'all involves taking away all ass isn't that true what else did we do it to what else did we do it to guys what else would we turn white marble white rice rice we turned [ __ ] rice white did we yeah rice is brown mark facts do not care about your feelings right now dude we're going off of feelings okay okay feelings don't care about your facts that's what i mean neither of them yeah we have rice that got turned white what else got turned white huh huh asians we turn them white yeah geishas geishas right maybe right about that yeah yeah i used to get as white as possible with makeup you would [ __ ] white it up put the little high pink blush on white hair white hair white wigs turn hair white bruh that's how much we love white [ __ ] we got fake hair and chose for it to be white that's crazy usually people would choose like a luscious brown or blonde if you will or indian most of the time most of the time indian brown hair probably straight off of a girl's nipple do you think that's what they make wigs out of they think they just shaved out girls titties they make a nice salute of business because i ain't seen one [ __ ] real talk akash i ain't seen a single bald indian [ __ ] in india but apparently all that hair is coming from india i think it's coming from titty hair you know how soul food is the worst parts of the animal and then you make oh my god city hair makes weaves worst part of the titty now we turn into a business and that's why black women were like don't touch my hair because that's sexual assault i think we're on to something real talk that's why you got to start with something crazy kamala being a hypothetical hoe is going to get us to black girls weaves are made by indian city hair hey man i can't deny the facts you can't deny it they don't care about my feelings done mark is there anything that you're looking up right now no i'm trying to figure out where sugar comes from trinidad comes from what sugar comes from trinidad and tobago's and also the other caribbean islands yes that is a fact maybe now it does we got our own sugar no you didn't you've never had sugar they had sugar before never never had sugar they never had sugar before you had jesus y'all slow yo that man's slow that's another thing we turned white i mean there's that one we be turning [ __ ] white bro bro oh if you want to grow up in the suburbs oh [ __ ] what color are the picket fences why picket fences in your ideal white world oh my goodness christ this is unbelievable white people have turned everything white to normalize whiteness to make that the status quo what did she why didn't any of y'all think of that what color are these floors white [Laughter] but why the [ __ ] did y'all come up with these ideas why are you guys colonizing to slave a whole race why didn't you do that wait what mark what you didn't have to go that deep with this yeah why didn't you i really i mean man indians tried we just didn't get the boat yeah i mean i said we [ __ ] up we didn't take it international we did that [ __ ] to our own you did it to your own yeah man because you had enough people you think that's what it was you already had enough right right or no is it am i wrong which one is it did i think something really rough i thought she was reacting no but yo white people we always knock for traveling al i think that's what they're doing they're scouting son oh my goodness yeah white people i just love to travel you scouting ass [ __ ] scouting ass barefoot ass [ __ ] you scouting ass barefoot ass [ __ ] whenever you're going like a mission trip to africa i know the mission oh my god so are you saying that mormons are not actually these kind of like devout christians they are the first line for the new colonization what color are their shirts oh my goodness oh my goodness i'm about to blow your mind the natural color of cotton ranges from tan to green to brown what the [ __ ] is going on dude son what come on son come on the natural color of cotton what website you get that from thanks for taking us to america.org.org no dude that's crazy white people just make anything white that they do so what color are churches jesus white we'll call our churches are they white usually white sometimes yeah yeah sometimes they're wood this guy gets in the studio paints this whole [ __ ] yeah the floors white yo but i wasn't the one who decided that a white man did a half white man a half asian man both white that's an interesting thing yeah how do you think his how do you think he got half white and half asian tell me probably his dad was like yo let's make some [ __ ] whiter oh my well his dad was the asian one oh unexpected twist tearing up white puss right after world war ii had his own pearl harbor real talk that is [ __ ] fantastic dude the levels of game that you need post pearl harbor to tear up white puss as a japanese man i'm just waiting for the day you guys are fast muscle fibers what the [ __ ] happened yes i wasn't sure if i wanted to get this out just get it out son i said i can't wait for the day you guys big up a black guy for [ __ ] a white girl the way you just picked up an asian guy for [ __ ] away girl now cause it's easy for y'all actually it's fishing with dynamite yeah what for an asian bruh why girls wanna [ __ ] how does that dude yo if if an asian dude [ __ ] a black girl how would you feel about it you'd be like oh [ __ ] yeah it's back right he's the underdog he's the under oh that's a good ass [ __ ] point wait underdog is a dish how is the asian underdog here the asian male is an underdog have you ever seen asian man just out there pimping slang and dick to every race that's a good he's making a good point matter of fact i remember i think okay cupid released like stats on who was the most desirable race um [Applause] that's not the point the point is we're not on the sides because we don't have to no they didn't say that though it was asian dudes and black women asian dudes and black women i didn't want to say the back half after i already called out black but that's the second half of that how would they put that info out there it seems there was i don't think they did i don't think that was part of that i think they did i think okcupid put out like this as information like this is the most desirable is asian asian women or white women come on bro you know already definitely definitely spanish oh no we're not going to go back now we're not going to go back again i've really been colonizing his brain son yeah his brain has been colonized bro they she got too duck she got you twist around her finger dog so yeah i wanted to talk about michelle right yo wow wow black women wow beautiful black smart gray matter gray matter that's why that's why all right guys we're gonna take a break for a second so we can save you some money that's right let's save you some money everybody need money saved especially right now during these corona times um listen if you with home insurance okay i'm trying to save you 1100 bucks actually 1100 and change a little bit more simple as that all you gotta do is uh do is go to policy genius policy genius dot com okay they're gonna save you on home and auto insurance an average of 1127 a year by shopping top rate insurance in one place okay basically what they 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hello all right everybody can use it right now you guys got to do it this is what i want you to do go to policy genius immediately and get busy all right let's get back to the show yo aside michelle obama bro did you see the speech doc queen i did not watch the democratic national convention at all so i tried to watch it i watched a little bit and then this girl khloe bachara was talking this is the worst yeah she is so bad bro son that [ __ ] is like one of the little space jams you know before they become the monsters that's so specific you know this their frumpy ass work like this with a little bow tie doug they're all so phony it's really amazing what trump did to politics i will give him this he we always knew politicians spoke to us in a phony way yeah and i'll give a lot of credit to uh barack and he had political swagger meaning like he spoke in the same kind of like political tone incredibly polished but he did seem authentic right it seemed like this guy's talking to you he's legit dude he seems like a regular guy who happens to be brilliant and all this other [ __ ] but not phony so how he did it is [ __ ] incredible it's really brilliant after trump every politician sounds like a [ __ ] idiot when they talk they sound like a liar they sound like a used car salesman they sound absolutely pathetic and it enrages me listening to them i don't care which side you're on i get enraged because i know you're [ __ ] lying to me yes it's an act yes it's like they're putting on an accent they're doing the entire thing you know why a lot of people you know who else has that ability who michelle and i think that's why a lot of people are like yo she should run she seems like she's so authentic yeah which is what makes this heartbreaking oh yeah akash did some snooping on michelle he trying to take down michelle bro this is a doctored video you know play it out can we play it well when you said it's a doctored video does that be his akash okay i want to start by thanking harvey weinstein for organizing this amazing day this is possible because of harvey he is a wonderful human being a good friend and just a powerhouse so basically what it is is uh michelle obama congratulating harvey weinstein and saying he's a great guy and all this other [ __ ] now i want to say in defense michelle obama she also calls him a good friend right and i do want to say this she's doing and listen you are accountable for your words all that kind of stuff they're not good friends he paid for this whole [ __ ] dinner i'm sure it was like a donation type thing to raise money and she's doing the pleasantries she's saying the right things in no [ __ ] way if she knew what was going on with this guy would she go out there and she'd say in my opinion i don't think so because i think there's too much political capital lost supporting a guy with this kind of shady [ __ ] going on she could know he's a puss hound but not out here you know even that she might not even know that [ __ ] because she doesn't even she might not even know about him being a puss hound like she's not in the hollywood world yet during this speech right but akash doesn't believe it he's not convinced come on song akash go here's the only thing that trips me up yeah is we would be giving her and maybe she rightfully so maybe we're giving her more credit than every other politician who has a picture with jeffrey epstein who was cool with jeffrey epstein and then all of a sudden he's like oh i had no idea and we're like you [ __ ] knew what you talking about you didn't know same thing we said about the um that's a good rumors about comics if trump and epstein are in pictures together all of a sudden it's like yo trump knew everything epstein was doing but when michelle i'm just seeing my own bias right now i don't see people really put the trump situation on him because there's only that one picture at the party and then he said i stopped [ __ ] with him the ones we really drag mud are the ones up that hung out with him mad time so how can you not see something after hanging out with a dude mad time but if you're saying that one of your good friends wonderful and in 2013 i'm telling you there were rumors of at least him being a colossal [ __ ] at least so and also i think mark had a video that he pointed out from like 95 2005 2005 sorry courtney love what was it what was her advice basically some actress was like hey courtney love if you wanted to give advice to a young actress in hollywood what would you say and she was like if harvey weinstein invites you to a party at the four seasons don't go oh so the rumors were out there in 2005. and i think whitney was writing a bunch of rose jokes about harvey weinstein about what a creep he was back in the day too she set him on stern son courtney love have you seen courtney love oh wow it looks it looks to me ow that you could be what is it called being gay oh yeah victim blaming no i'm just saying she doesn't look incredible i'm sorry can i just give a little push back on one thing that's exactly what victor victor [Laughter] no no i'm just saying she looks like a [ __ ] have you seen the way she dresses yeah perhaps it was her fault if we look at it that way now now here's the thing out some might agree with you some might agree with you but some might also say that that's incredibly sexist in what you're saying but wasn't she on drugs and a whole bunch wasn't she a party person i don't really know too much about her but wasn't she the one with that rock you're not digging yourself out of this hole i swear i don't care just keep doubling down without realizing it yeah but she killed kirko man yeah from partying and all this crazy [ __ ] we ain't this could be a learning experience for alex all right go so they were asking for it they were asking for it all right al some people will say that you can't make that distinction even based on their behavior the girls that exhibit this kind of party behavior can still get sexually assaulted too and uh also probably a lot of times girls that go through trauma like that start trying to cope with drugs and [ __ ] like that importing etcetera yeah and killing kirkle bands and killing kurt cobain because there's no way he can mark gives a [ __ ] about a guy who died the year he was born but still but still yeah he did she did kill him because she couldn't hold the shotgun in the court of the law they measured it measured it they measured so in the court of law like she would be she wouldn't be a credible witness why not because she's like documented being on drugs and being this party person and all that so that's what i'm saying i hear you it's hard swear to god it's not getting better i didn't know but this is you guys are teaching me and now teach me all right this is what we're gonna do before we teach you about this we just need to acknowledge why we're dressed so sexy on this show okay so i think now it's time so to teach him the al goes wow i learned something and then we all feel better yeah right now al just blame the woman i swear we keep trying to explain it to you and you're like no but in the corner you won't get it literally made it legal oh okay not believe it this is i know this is hard for you to understand but this is what they're trying to say that when girls say they're raped just hear them out that's the basis of it you don't go like yeah but you out there partying a lot what was you doing on saturday he was partying i don't blame them for getting raped oh now i understand feminism oh it's so funny i hope you learned something man i hope you all learned something all right boom so now it's time for the flight and fashion show all right uh you guys dressed like whoa [Applause] oh just offending one group after the next day i think you guys guys probably heard a beep recently all right so listen we got to drop this flavoring fashion show and why are we doing this why are we doing this why are we doing this [Applause] like when my girl asked me a question i don't know the answer yet i just repeat the question until i find the answer so she's like why did it take you so long to go to the gym i'd be like why did it take me something oh i'll tell you why it took me so long to catch it it's like when you ask a kid a math question and she's like oh that's easy 17 times 7. all right so but listen i don't know mark why are we all right oh because they were y'all were saying on patreon how i was the best dressed comedian in the game we said where's his dress and i said no i'm by far the best dress it's not even close son i got tagged so many times of so many comedians i'm the best dressed comedian in a game yeah that [ __ ] where kids size is different don't matter no it does matter it does matter that's even better yeah no you gotta get limited j's and kid sizes the build-a-bear workshop is different it is a build-a-bear workshop he dresses like build-a-bear yeah yeah yeah take that way out all right so real talk but in all seriousness i watched kevin hart when it comes to dressing everybody on this planet we were saying andrew's the words dressed comedian no no no i'm by far the best dressed and nobody's close he's not the best dressed on the podcast and now we're having a fashion show okay first of all i'm without a doubt best dress on a podcast not even close say allen dresses top up i'll dress like a [ __ ] boston terrier okay you don't even got nothing on the bottom half but it's just a little outfit okay yeah he winnie okay but he losing good so so after there was we all completely agreed that i was best dressed on uh in all of comedy then we decided to have fashion show okay so akash first of all judge my outfit well let's start with akash judge your outfit go are we doing this is it it started fashion hey sweets let me introduce you to my friend who's going first akash is going first akash what are you wearing today explain what you're wearing today uh this is a traditional indian clothing sharwani it's called shadowani okay and then jay's on the feet obviously okay as well as i could killing it i don't know what else i need to explain there's nothing else you need to explain okay nice frags on the feet we got the nice what what'd you say dude no no you don't know what you're talking about all right get out of here i'll get out of here i'll get out of here don't cut that we're not good i'm trying to cut everything to make him look bad we all look stupid on his podcast that's part of it all right i'm here dressed as carmen sandiego now look um akash you have this you have this outfit going on it's fire you coming through the fashion it's nice okay i mean um listen i got my [ __ ] right now obviously i'm looking fly as [ __ ] i got the spotted pants and paint spotted pants like obviously this is the worst outfit you've worn ever that's what your opinion i have to change bro i'm not ready for the fashion oh you got yourself a dog yeah it's not that vital that if you go for a minute we're gonna miss you guys who's gonna go get your shirt i hope they got some [ __ ] on the shoulder so alex can't get it i missed it i don't get it because if he's not here it's just the side frame oh yeah yeah so the outfit go well are we doing a fashion show we're not walking why because there's not really space i mean we could walk in front but like are we really gonna get it all right go get your [ __ ] we'll talk in the meantime go get your [ __ ] all right this is what we're gonna do we're gonna have an actual fashion show all right so everybody listen right now you can keep tuned in because we're gonna give you vivid descriptions of what's going on and everybody watching you are welcome we're gonna start it off with my man akash thing but you know that you can't have a fashion show without some music so mark is on the ones and ones yeah and he's going to play some music for us dj mark gagnon in the building yeah hit it again young marquee rape oh [ __ ] you ready okay akash go uh oh okay akash is out here let me see it let me see it turn around show the people he got the suit on i'm not exactly sure what it is it's a blazer it looks like it's for somebody that's way taller than him he's like a general fire no no no no no no no no he got the moves with it if you think he won't move can you hit the doggy in that [ __ ] oh wait hey i'm not gonna lie the tails on are crazy that [ __ ] is so fire looks like indian beethoven yeah it is weird i don't even know how to roast it i'll be honest like there's a lot i want to say about it but i don't really know what to say just right now but it does have this very like militaristic vibe to it is this a military type outfit no not that i know of this is just a suit this is regal [ __ ] oh this is like you gotta be part of the upper cast no i think at this point obviously you just buy it but i think that's how it started probably like most things all right man i wish i had them different do you guys have anything for it i wish i had more roasted two flies it's kind of fire you can't make fun of that i won guys i'm going to get this i'm going to get that cigarette i always ask me legit where you could buy it yeah i wouldn't wear that [ __ ] i would wear it i'm going to wear it to a black wedding you would wear that to a black well that's interesting because you wouldn't know this but i wrote this to my wedding so it's very dear to me you go get that knife out of your bag dude jeez that was harsh i didn't think we had to go back into this but that was really hard so you put that whole thing on just to go and zoom yeah yeah yeah very important day ready to rumble all right but like lights for real let's go let's move on before i get angry all right alex what did you wear today bring it out bring it up to the front let's go out let's see what you got alex came through they can't see your sneakers anyway it's all good they can't they can't really see it and mark in this time you know you should probably do you should check to see if we're in the wide which hopefully we are and then you should also go get dressed in your outfit yeah okay okay let's see it okay al coming through we asked him to get dressed up for the fashion show obviously he didn't do any effort whatsoever he's got um i don't know what that is what is the color on the top what'd you say he got salmon he gets salmon pronouncing the l so keeping it extra um we got some nike i don't know air force one off-white collab that's what's up keeping it like your girl um and i like the pants i'm not gonna lie the pants are kind of far al is coming through this might be one of owl's first fits that i am top to bottom supportive of you know what he prepared for the fashion show because he put on pants that's right normally he's wearing lululemon tights or whatever thank you no this is not the kit pants the kid pit honestly he's kind of dressed nice he's dressed kind of nice i'm not going to lie i don't know about win yet but al came i went for sure cal came through i thought he was going to wear one of them stupid-ass shirts again but he didn't he actually came through in a very difficult to roast outfit shoes are coming off okay mark gagnon what do you have for us come on in right now son oh jesus [ __ ] christ yo holy [ __ ] i knew he i told y'all he was going to act like he wasn't going to come in he was going to act like it wasn't a big i'm just saying why don't you take it with you i the way he laughed it out i'm telling you it was like you stupid idiot you didn't prepare i got some [ __ ] mark if you don't come in in 10 seconds it's over okay about to be disqualified disqualified in ten nine eight seven six five four three two one oh [ __ ] all right it's coming mark came through so i'm butting your [ __ ] pants down yo i saw mark's dick earlier yeah they just didn't just see martin's savage yo real talk though you should get that little freckled mark check yo cause this is this yo you know what mark is not a [ __ ] on your dick you gotta get that you gotta get that jax up son this is you know that they they found the people who killed uh or they think kill run dmc right and mark is dressed as gym master gang killing it he got the chain and everything bro look at that he got the stick oh oh wow he brought out that oh wow do you got these no i got those so he really got the run d in me's right now that's what you got mark this is he got the rude collab sneakers i mean this is you really went for it mark you you definitely are the most feminine all right all right obviously had to come through you know what i'm saying yeah i got the ryan ramallah uh hat on um i'm saying beautiful piece of artwork right here um you know i got this the paint splatter pan paint splatter t-shirt left unbuttoned show that chest oh you already know that i hate that yo i hate that he looks like a scarecrow like a gay steve irwin he's the [ __ ] hunter yeah that [ __ ] kind of hate it yo hold on one second i got one more part yeah if it's kind of trash though y'all gotta wait one more second because i'm the best better ever on the planet you better elevate it right now let's name comedians that are better dressed than andrew he talks so much [ __ ] three are better dressed for sure yeah son and this is not me not even trying yeah oh legit didn't prepare he talked so much [ __ ] on what was it friday yeah patreon he was going off about how he's gonna have the best outfit the biggest stand-up comedy pager the biggest comedian patreon in the world saying that you know i mean just throwing that out there we'll talk about it more in a bit but but maybe that's why he dresses like that he's too rich to understand he dresses like trash that's the problem he's so rich now like when he was describing the hat off-cam he was like oh he outsources this mate it's the widest he's ever sounded oh right what was he saying he outsourced this from oh he just finds it in tibet yeah oh yeah that's what that happened you need no people in your life it's kevin hart that's why he flies yeah if you can afford pretty much anything you can you only want things that are like super obscure coveted and you can't find anywhere that's what that [ __ ] ass hat is sucking oh my god worse dress i hate that hat what's taking you so long dog come on son about to be disqualified in ten nine eight oh those are fire this [ __ ] is fire that pulled the whole outfit together that's what i was missing bro yo no lie those tips look fire i'm trying this is the heat right here bro that little maca tim those shits are kind of fire i know i don't know about that them shit's just waterproof in the front a little mm-hmm and then just the white bottom is kind of fire super comfortable but doesn't that fit don't not like really pull the outfit together it's cool because it it's it's tim's but it's not it doesn't look like regular temps exactly it looks like just not as like construction you know exactly i'm not a construction worker so i don't need to construct are you all done where are you going come back yo come here bro stop playing oh [ __ ] like i didn't see it coming oh were trash till i saw him on you no yo though for real [ __ ] yours is different yeah those are different look push up and put mine up hey look how yours looks so stupid yeah yeah you're right in the front also they're stupid and also right you're right yeah dude right you know those suck bro yeah yo you got some trash ass tim's bro why is it so hard for you to get tims you know what you got the right pair i'd be setting trends that's what i'd be doing oh oh okay best dressed comedian in the game i think yeah how are you gonna tell me yeah that's [ __ ] up [ __ ] said the shots damn bro i thought we were gonna troll him for longer no he how'd you know what gave it off you live with it or you spend enough time with andy you know when the joke is coming i knew when the joke was coming wow when last week patreon yeah what gave it away you just said fashion show too confidently and you said it to me like [ __ ] this for you and i was like i know ah [ __ ] damn son yo mark did you order disposable cameras yeah why just that you can take pictures of these fly ass shoes the [ __ ] you think all right i'm just making sure mark wasn't making personal purchases on my amazon account and they were just going to call about right on as soon as this thing [ __ ] up he's like yo mark your piece of [ __ ] were you trying to steal from the company this show must go warm man the show high on me how's it going bro that's what it is oh my god it's a real talk man all right now that the gig is up these are really horrible you know what i didn't realize they were bad until i saw him on you and now you see how stupid you look now i see it why do you think you had to see it on me you just really pulled it together with the stupidity like the rest of the outfit exposed the whole sneaker and i was like that's a problem yeah best stress canadian positive affirmations dog all right um do you think you're pulling it off better than the archives yeah one hundred percent no 100 chance yes you're swimming in those food those are three sizes too big for you well i just got them laced so [ __ ] big you know what i mean say again i just got them laced so loose no but even them so swagged out with the legs ankle looks stupid in them everything i'd be having skinny ankles don't don't tell them you're showing too much of yours to be insulting anybody's things i'm just saying i show it because it's beautiful that's the right amount of hair nah let me tell you something for real i look like a russian's back nah let me tell you something your beauty ends like indian's mid-drift got an unhappy trailer is it difficult for you to look at that what that yeah you show it all the time but is it difficult does it like turn you on is that like every once in a while dude cash and you're like oh titties i mean no no that's just man for real that drew this this looks not it you know you don't think it's it it's not it and i would give it to you if it's not it's uh damn guys but what about the paint splash sure it's too big [Laughter] on your pants the first time i saw you wear this [Music] smurf come on i'm not even lying the first time you wore those pants was the first day in the studio yeah and i was looking around like where's the blue what the [ __ ] is this guy there's no way he bumped me actually i thought you actually painted in these no no i wish he did repainted anyway guys look um we have uh more time to fill so so it's on to the next topic can we just talk about how mark pissed in the sink that's disgusting yo you're vile yo out that's vile literally there's three stalls i was furious because akkas broke rule number one that we have yeah at the studio thank you i didn't know that was there are three stalls okay you see his [ __ ] splatter all right we're here 10 [ __ ] 12 14 hours a day sometimes what that's a lot of hours well i started at 10 it didn't seem enough because sometimes we're here 14. oh that's good so i don't want to undershoot us yeah 12 hours a day minimum 12 hours a day that means we have to take at least two or three shifts what he said 10. then you were like sometimes 14 every once in a while so i made it 12 and then i said 12 and you were like nevertheless never less than 12. it couldn't be less than 12. my brain is beautiful bro okay so we have to take two or three shits the left urinal stall or whatever is the [ __ ] one you don't pee in that one hey noted you know what i mean but i thought i was doing you guys a favor taking the furthest stall i got in first i was like oh people are peeing behind me let me give them the better stall giving person like you thought and then mark the animal ruined it for everybody pissed in the sink my [ __ ] was out of charity his was out of selfishness sold out his [ __ ] dick his uncircumcised dick and started dragging his foreskin all over the [ __ ] sink and peed in it and al you saw his dead it's disgusting well let me just say how do we know that the [ __ ] toilet is the [ __ ] toilet you know how we know because andrew never flushes that ah it's a toilet wait a minute never cause y'all be like come on we got to get back to work and there's this old [ __ ] floating in the toilet getting the air all shitty that should be nasty though really yeah you have like explosive [ __ ] dog because it'd be like everywhere in the bowl it goes just i go off the backboard every single time and i think i have a higher facing [ __ ] because most people's [ __ ] drops straight down the toilet my [ __ ] goes back it's like al's i wonder why it is that way no but so for real but why don't you flush i do flush because i to me that's the equivalent of just [ __ ] on the ground and then it's just in the air no it's not pissing in the sink is still worse yeah that's bad yeah did you see it yeah what color i didn't know he has a freckle on his dick how much where did you look at it i mean i got a glitz you got a freckle on what part of his dick yeah which part like a mole it's a small mole do you think you have a horn yeah i have a small before yeah you have a fork and some hair yeah it's an imagination imagine you got herpes and you only [ __ ] one girl oh my god nah i didn't look like you know hurt my ain't gonna put no hurt on mark but nah you can't put a hurt by mark but you could because that's a faithful man so it really wouldn't matter because you're not hurting his chances of pousse or oh okay it would just ruin his relationship with his current girlfriend you might not it might not it might prove that she's at home maybe so far she's not though which is good that's very good yeah she's listening back to saving lives yeah okay you're in the hospital what are you doing listening to this that's what we gotta do is shame our girls for listening during the pod back to work that's why it's so busy because you're always listening to the podcast so dirty right now geez make the bed clear what what boy right mark's a king yo i know we ain't like marketing the king mark the [ __ ] king what something's going on over there so she's missing a foot or something yeah we don't know about there's something going on i gotta look to see she got all her limbs essentially or maybe mark convinced her she's missing a foot he's like now you got phantom limb syndrome you think you have a foot but you don't really stop looking at my girl's feet always look at his feet nonstop this guy needs to chill wow those are my feet anyway all right go back to the towel let's see what we got we got some more [ __ ] that we gotta talk to you all about oh we should talk about this um these these heroin playoffs happening oh yeah dog you finally started watching i did it's so sorry watching it is really good man i was watching yesterday i was watching inside a bar with other people also watching the game how great was that that was a dope feeling mask on mask off like not had it off because i was eating also and drink it yeah so so this is at least yeah yeah okay and they had like barriers in there oh that's great yo it's pretty dope so are you allowed to be in the bar where you were yeah what was the where were you long island and they don't have the same like restrictions no city's different oh i thought it was a whole state of new york yeah oh they operate differently bro they ain't [ __ ] over there bro i'll tell you it was good to watch i was watching my boy luka doncic i know he got they got [ __ ] my mavericks got [ __ ] oh that's the nba that's the nba i don't want to say it's fake oh you really think so yeah you're not going to let the clippers lose bro i don't maybe the clippers don't match up that well with uh the mass well they swept him in the regular season the maps but if you listen to dallas everybody's like we can't play the clippers in the first round that's our toughest matchup they especially if you're luca the the best long-armed defenders in the league basically are all on that team essentially son luca was dominating there's a there's a time where straight up where are you going okay where luca straight up bullied kawhi leonard bro he drove to the basket with his right hand put his shoulder in kauai him sent kawhi flying and then just hit a little layup at the ramp this guy is going to be so [ __ ] nice he's the truth already nice so here's the truth i mean he's going to be like we're talking yo he is he the closest thing to lebron we got i mean he's not nearly the defender and he's not nearly as quick it's so in terms of size passing ability ability to finish around the rim he's a better shooter than lebron was he will not be lebron but like who's another guy with that size that passing ability larry bird bro he's a little more athletic than larry bird he's a fascinating and he's getting quicker he was like he's kind of just like a chubby person i think but like you can tell he's working on everything he still gets tired at the end of games yeah but he's quicker in the bubble than he was before like he clearly worked out he's got deceptive speed man he's he's like um yeah i mean it's really hard to find like a you know a mirror image of him in the league at all but yeah like he has his style of play yeah it's different beverly can't stay in front of him yeah paul george can't stay in front of him none of them kawhi can't stay in front of none of them can stay in front of he he goes to the basket at will and he's so tall he can finish over anybody yeah and then he can actually shoot yep so i saw not too many people could stay in front of him he just dude we don't talk about kawhi enough this guy is the way he plays the game it just it's too easy yeah i agree he he is going to go down to one of the greatest players of all time i think yeah i mean it was a great game though [ __ ] you see me back yeah [ __ ] killer dog this guy is the idea that people still think kyrie is better is so laughable everybody taking my take now espn had a poll who's better kyrie or dame remember i said damn is better yeah damn is the [ __ ] truth and there's a a post some rookie on the blazers said back in like february or early march uh dame said to this rookie he said what i'm about to do you ain't ever seen in your life we making these [ __ ] playoffs and everything went to [ __ ] and gave a much better chance but my man after you missed those two free throws against the clippers just dominant 60-point game 50-point game 40-point game like unreal would like skip skip not giving him his props and [ __ ] like that uh then like skip like calling him and like just cop and please on the phone and that's the thing about skip is you just got to look at him as an entertainer not as an actual and he's entertaining so yeah watch it like it's fun it's great it's rush limbaugh but not like hateful but just like that's just a character in a thing it's wrestling none of it is real yes but then why does steven a's word hold more weight just i think steven a is a little bit more accurate in the sports that he knows i think he's a little less biased too like the sports of stephen a knows he's pretty legit i mean he doesn't know anything about boxing or mma maybe boxing a little but not mma but um but when it comes to i think what was his initial he was like a basketball writer in philadelphia yeah and i think stephen a started off less like skip so we still see him as that yeah and then he's become more like skip with the hot takes and he's anti-cowboys because skip was cowboys or whatever but like now it's we already know who stephen a is and what he knows and all that he's got chops and we know that skip came onto the national scene like this this is how he got his name so i think we look at skip like that's who you are steven a has more credibility because he earned it early on gotcha but it's good to see things are happening i really hope they do a documentary about the bubble man can't be done by the nba though yeah gotta be an independent company i'm just i'm just hearing so many cool stories coming out of the bubble and i hope they do it by like aggregating all of the players and coaches personal footage like their cell phone footage yeah oh like an oral history but in video yeah so it's like you have the documentaries uh in like interview style where it's just somebody in a room talking and then you use the footage from their phones that they've been documenting while they're there will be all saved on their instagram stories and all that kind of [ __ ] and you display that over you know the stories that they're telling and i think will just be so cool man i'm just hearing so such cool [ __ ] that's happening anything you talk about ah not really i just don't want to like break that yeah the thing the rule change that allows them to now bring girls in is it ex is it for everybody men women families or is it just players yeah you know no that's interesting that's a good question i'm i imagine it's for everybody but there are so many people there that maybe it wouldn't be reasonable uh 100 there's no way that they're letting just every assistant coach and have people come to the game if lebron can only have one person come to the game there's no way the assistant coach can have the same amount of people so i think it's just their way of going like look they're locked in here they're gonna go [ __ ] crazy unless they get some [ __ ] yeah let's let them fly and honestly if you're a gm you should be able to leave like you don't have to be there at the playoff games you do a quarantine protocol but go during the playoffs for five days whatever see whoever you need to see the only people that really need to say are the players the head coach and honestly they could prob i don't know maybe they could do like a break built into the bubble where like for a week everybody goes you get two days and come back that's the promise you're gonna get corona during the break they literally have no cases right now yeah it's true that's the perfect scenario they created a new corona test just for them well they were using it just for them a saliva test and it's now it's becoming a cheaper test alternative to the no swap let capitalism win bro yeah let people who are incentivized by money quicker cheaper yeah but that's the thing it's like you heard what happened with that rookie on the seahawks which one there's a rookie dick uh got let go from the team because he had a girl jump to the girl into the hotel but it's just like it's a perfect example it's like if you don't lock them in a bubble they're gonna have hoes come through and the hoes are gonna spread that rona and to your capitalism point that's an idiot like let the strongest survive or whatever like you you're too dumb to be a rookie and try to bring a [ __ ] in you don't want this job be out yeah yeah maybe he tried to dress her up like a guy nah isn't that what he did yeah that's hilarious make her look like a team player so funny that's hilarious how ugly was this [ __ ] that's what i'm saying like you probably just gotta put like a big hoodie on or some [ __ ] like that with the team i mean if you're a if you're a bad [ __ ] you there's no way you could possibly pass for a [ __ ] wide receiver tight end whatever like there's nothing kicker maybe but no black kickers it's got to be a white girl and even then uh you know how you cover that bazoom how do you cover that bosom um my boys i got any predictions or it's too early i want to say the blazers are going to give the lakers a lot of trouble taking the seven i don't think they will i think we want to believe they will but i don't think they what's the series have they started yet no sir they're they're getting today right yeah i don't think uh i think they're out of here quick but still it's a cool story yeah i mean he and this is the guy who was campaigning like he literally said i'm not gonna play if i don't have a chance to make the playoffs and then they said all right you got a chance and he was like all right let's go after he had 61 against the mavs i watched his post game and he was just like this is the most important thing in my life right now like this is i want this more than anything this is what i this is what i called for they gave me the opportunity we have to make these players i love it what do you think about the suns you know the sun's going eight and 0 and the bubbles bounce and then they get bounced but like do you think that there's some promise or do you think people just weren't really playing teams that already clinched their playoff seeds are they really caring well my whole beef with devon booker all before was you're so good but you don't win your team never wins right this is only eight games but an eight game winning streak is pretty like i ain't seeing kyrie do that on a team that's not good that's not stacked so i'm impressed you know what i mean like that cause that was my knock because you're that vain who like kevin love whatever you're great but as the alpha dog your team don't win this team went on a little streak and he he did it like he put him on his back yeah so if he can do that and ayton can develop they're promising i guess i don't know we'll see him on green said he needs to leave and got fined say what jeremiah green was like he got to get off this you got to get out of the sun they're not going anywhere that is weird though like draymond green oh yeah so draymond green was was on like inside the nba yeah right which is a show where you're supposed to give your opinions yeah about basketball yeah there's an opinion-based show about basketball yeah he gave his opinion but because he's an active basketball player he got fined for that opinion don't hire active basketball players no it should happen tnt should cover that fine otherwise you're not going to get active basketball players to come on yourself yeah like it's just such a weird thing or except that this is the platform and it promotes the game by having active basketball players on that platform you have to let them say whatever they want within that you know sphere yeah it might be tough to do but don't have them go on there and being completely neutered i mean he just gave an opinion he said get out of phoenix maybe it's like tampering or something right yeah is that what they said all these players are texting each other is that really that hard yeah but is it is that tampering to go hey that team isn't good that isn't good well he said yo he got to get out of there but he didn't say come to the warriors yeah like i don't know bro but like yeah let's be real these guys all text each other to recruit anyway so yeah that is a pretty dumb rule yeah why can't you recruit what is the issue with that why can't you recruit what's wrong with that i guess they don't want super teams i mean anyway yeah but i mean it would player-led super teams but that happens always asians putting those shits together oh so this rule comes from the owners most likely not other players i just don't think it makes any sense whatsoever you should allow the players to talk to each other because they're going to do it in private anyway when they do it on tv it's wrong just let them say hey come play with us why wouldn't every player go hey we love lebron on the team come on over you think that's really going to make lebron go maybe i should go to orlando it's not going to affect the game at all yeah 100 like if they it's just such a stupid thing to find let the players tamper it'd be way more fun if they're out there campaigning on the [ __ ] post game interviews that'd be so fun yeah it's this is wrestling make it wrestling i get the idea of not criticizing the officials right and like punishing them for criticizing the officials because you have to protect the officials if there was no recourse whatsoever for saying whatever you wanted about the officials then after every single loss they'd be like look that guy david's a piece of [ __ ] it undercuts the authority of the officials like in hockey there's no text right there's no tease so they call the officials maggot like there's crazy youtube videos right and it's hilarious they're just insulting the [ __ ] out of the officials because there is no there's nothing to stop them right there's nothing to incentivize them otherwise yeah so you can't get them in a little box thing and they can't but that's just when they treat each other bad you need a deterrent you need some sort of deterrent so i get it but when it comes to tampering get that [ __ ] out of there let these guys tamper it'd be amazing it's so fun to watch yeah so anyway liking each other's instagram pictures whatever the stupid [ __ ] we got to look for make it out there accounts all that nonsense what's up all right guys we're going to take a break let me tell you something about the mattress that i used to have that [ __ ] was trash it was supposed to be good top rated mattress on amazon everybody's saying hey it's great for the price trash foam supposed to be so good so soft my girl and i get so goddamn hot on this mattress i was sleeping on the couch more than i was the bed itself then helix came through said yo we know everybody's different we got a hybrid bed that's going to get less hot foam and coil springs and since some people like soft beds medium beds hard beds take this quiz and we're going to give you the mattresses perfect for you i took a quiz online took less than five minutes i think al you taking the same quiz or mark you took the same quiz this [ __ ] is incredible i'm sleeping better i'm not dying boiling in my sleep throwing covers off everything about this mattress is great and honestly i think they won awards you know i'd be doing research because i'm indian they won awards from gq men's health if you're a dude these are the best brands you need to know right wired if you're a dork and i think something like apartment living or something like that they've been winning all these awards it's a great mattress guys go to helix.com if your mattress sucks the single most important thing you can do is sleep well that's right so go to helix.com take the sleep quiz and when you buy uh put in pump uh when you go to helix.com flagrant you get 200 off your mattress and two free pillows not no [ __ ] ass thin ass pillows i'm talking about high quality you will sleep well on these pillows pillows go get it go get that man go sleep better enjoy your life let's get back to the show anyway um so here's an interesting story they said that uh amc is bringing back um movies i think it's this week and they're going to be 15 cents to honor the same price that they were in 1927 or something like that yeah and they're putting out like classics like back to the future is one of them right a couple others i think i think uh star wars are movies done i think that's the real question i don't think so what do you mean by movies i think movie theater sorry not movies movie theaters i think movie theaters are done dude i don't think they come back didn't they recently get rid of some law that uh prevented studios from opening their their own theaters did they i believe so interesting so that's crazy they even had a wall yeah now you're gonna probably see like just big studios have just their movies so it's a tricky thing right because the issue with putting a film out directly to vod which is video on demand where you just buy a pay-per-view essentially is it becomes incredibly easy to download it and then just repost it on one of those like torrent websites how you watch a bunch of movies on those tour websites right thanks nation say what thanks for stitching we got you doctor um so you can't do it if you're in a and also another thing is if you watch a movie on vod you download it and then four of you and your family watch it that's one price one ticket yeah for four people to watch instead of one ticket fifteen bucks for one person one fifty dollars exactly so they're gonna lose an incredible amount of money if it goes to vod but if it doesn't if it goes to vod not only are they going to lose money they can't fit the budget of these films if you're only making one quarter of what you used to make you all of a sudden cannot make the next avatar or jurassic park or any of these like 200 300 million dollar films you can't make avengers you can't make avengers if you're vod because it won't make enough money right it just unless they find a system where they can completely block it from being uh i guess like stripped from the internet and if you really want to do it you could do it just like they did bootlegs back in the day you could have a video camera set up in your apartment framed up to your tv instead of having to find an asian lady on the subway to buy the dvd it's a website that has it right up there that's it so it's like it's it's really it really could change the way that films are made and and drastically reduce budgets and why why would they not go to movie theaters i think because of corona people aren't going to movie theaters and i think yeah and i think once you get comfortable not going like once you accept that you could just watch something at home and enjoy it and have your food whatever you want to have get your delivery i mean like i love watching movies at home i never used to do it i loved the movie experience i was like a fun date night because i felt like staying at home watching the movie wasn't as an exciting as an exciting thing to do with my girl but now that i'm cool just doing that and that's an acceptable date i can't see people going back to movies is there like a virtual reality movie experience they could give you like even if you're just virtually going to the theater and paying less part of the reason why i bought the oculus to recreate that movie theater feel um that's what i was thinking when i was thinking about vr like it's dope and you cannot see the person like next to you or whatever or their avatar of the person next to you but it's still it's not that comfortable you still got this heavy [ __ ] sitting on your face maybe 10 to 15 years but no um driving movie theaters are becoming a lot more popular i can see that and that's as like a kind of novelty thing it's just in new york we can't do that i also think if you do that once or twice you're gonna be like i'm good but you need a car though sure you know what i'm saying like don't get me wrong it looks like a fun thing to do but all these new yorkers that would go to movies they don't have a car it was a cheap fun thing to do as a kid you have 10 bucks you go to a movie theater there's like this sense of independence and freedom that you have now that [ __ ] is done i do not see movie theaters recovering from this and i'm curious how the [ __ ] we're gonna have films are they gonna charge fifty dollars for the new avengers yeah i think it's gonna be the same as like a pay-per-view fight because let's be honest avengers end game we would have all paid a hundred dollars a ticket we would have i was more excited for end game than i was for any recent boxing match or mma fight so if end game comes out in six months would you not go to a theater and see it it depends you know what it might have to be it might have to be the expensive ticket what's the movie theater you like that's like very like a much better experience i have your ipod i pick or something i pick there's a movie theaters they have the reclining chairs and the [ __ ] i think that's you're gonna charge way more and it's gonna be for that like this is an upgraded experience i'm living in luxury it's like flying first class but for movies and then you'll pay 30 40 whatever maybe but it's like no but this is like it's like going to a fancy dinner i know i could get this at home but i'm paying for all of this also how are you gonna be comfortable with a mask on it is not comfortable this is all wearing a [ __ ] mask because i was flying and i had to like do stop overflight so the whole day i wore a mask it's awful it [ __ ] sucks sucks i get it i'm going to do it but it's just un you're out of breath the whole day it just sucks some people are gonna take it off in a movie theater and then that's the problem yeah wrong person takes it off it's a rap yeah they're gonna do the glass [ __ ] probably that's probably what they're gonna do like they're gonna do the glasses you buy tickets in groups of twos or fours like comedy shows they got the glass thing because they know they gotta they make more money on concessions than popcorn than tickets probably like if you're the movie theater yeah so they'll figure out some kind of situation where you can eat and drink and whatever and then i think once corona is like we have the vaccine then i think it's going to be morphed into like um this is an experience that's like luxurious almost big ass screen you might have a big tv at home you don't get a 400 inch screen no that's true they just are they just need to find a way to enter the uh i don't know movies were always on the precipice of the future right the idea of a movie theater even like connecting sound and video like all you always look for film and you're like wow this is the newest technology this is the newest graphics these are the newest like experiences that you can have visually and now the method in which they deliver it it may be antiquated they haven't found a way to monetize the future of what films are you need to deliver to our house maybe we'll go to the movie theater as well but you got to find a way to deliver to us yeah and we have vod but we can get around it too quick i think virtual reality might be the way maybe why would people be less inclined to go to a movie but still inclined to go to a restaurant i don't think people are as inclined to go to a restaurant i think they'll go outside you know and don't get wrong i have but like you're in there in a restaurant there's some separation between other people i really think it's gonna be the same thing it's gonna be like fine dining not any restaurant fine dining yeah and it's women women are gonna drive it they like having the experience of going out and doing these things and getting dressed up or whatever i think in the same way that's why i think it'll be more luxurious it's the experience of like oh we're just going out i'm getting dressed up we're paying money for tickets somebody's bringing us food whatever i think that's how it has to go because i think women care about the [ __ ] more than we do also my suspicion is that most of the country is not as scrupulous about corona as we are in new york you know i mean like yeah in new york like those things might suffer but like kansas city like you think they're gonna not go to i was in aspen right yeah super low cases like nothing there right right mandatory mask mandate outside that's crazy you can't walk around town without a mask and people come up and stop you security guards police officers they go you have to wear a mask or else you're going to be fine i think his point is middle america aspen might be geographically middle america but it's like socioeconomically not middle america fair you know i mean people with money probably tend to be more liberal etc kansas city like any of these florida the whole state pretty much like right that's a different level of even in pennsylvania no one was like wearing masks yeah we went into restaurants and like you had to wear the mask to the table and then take it off yeah that's how it is everywhere you wear the mass tip and then you can eat it yeah but with the movie theater you're gonna have to keep the mask on it's an unpleasant experience and also with the movie you don't need to be in the [ __ ] theater the theater never did anything for me the theater is just a barrier of entry for me to see the theater is the place where the movie is exactly right so now that we've eliminated that barrier of entry now that you can actually give that to me in my home why not just give it to me in my home because i make less money exactly so you have to find a way to monetize home and maybe what they'll do to make up for it we start to see a lot more like integrated advertising in films you know there's like stupid yeah yeah yeah like whenever you watch any james bond movie and you'll notice like when he's holding the steering wheel dude like well not only aston martin if the shot is over his right shoulder both of his hands will be on this on the right side of the steering wheel like nobody drives like this at two and three yeah but they're here so you could see the watch right so it's like maybe you start seeing a lot more of that and they try to monetize through advertising yeah but it can't go on like it i don't see it do you really see people packing into movie theaters anymore no i i think they'll just do what restaurants do and comedy clubs and just have those barriers and now those movie theaters are making half the amount of money that's not enough to profit a lot will close down a lot will close down i don't think it goes away i don't think movies are done right i think they will adapt also the thing about of course of course no doubt yeah i just mean like the way in which we watch them they have to be able to deliver it the opening night thing that we're like when you went to go see avengers and there's no [ __ ] seats available so sick yeah it's so great that's not around for another year or two it probably at least like we're not comfortable doing that for a while they're just gonna have to be at like 50 capacity they're gonna have to have barriers up and i i see the movie theaters like i pick are the ones that will be able to that's why i think yeah because they already serve um overpriced food so it's like you go there for that experience all they have to do is just put a little barrier right next to the pocket they're already kind of socially distanced because yeah yeah to his point of overpriced you know you're overpaying going in but it's about the experience yeah i got this big-ass screen i got this pod it's me and my girl it's romantic we got privacy it's let's go and i think the big there will be a few of those big screen old type movie theaters i'm sure but like as we knew them but i don't i think it's going to be more of the ipic you're paying for the experience beyond just big screen loud sound yeah i wonder if this creates a pretty cool um opportunity for new filmmakers in the same way that like youtube created an opportunity for shorter form content shows right like people watch this show as if it's a tv show yeah like we've created our own talk show essentially right they put it on their tv and then put it on their tv and they watch it so for whatever reason that never trickled into scripted tv it triggered trickled into sketch like you see sketch on youtube you see sketch on instagram that kind of stuff but like the scripted tv stuff long form you haven't really seen it and film it never really touched it and i wonder if the comfort with video on demand i wonder if we are comfortable watching what is it the prince of state island or the king instead of whatever i rented it right so it's like i wonder if we get more and more comfortable with renting these things on apple or amazon or whatever different you know streaming service you use if new filmmakers who are unattached right could create their own pieces and then put them up there with much more much less like a scrutiny you know if somebody's like oh my film's going straight to you know apple tv or whatever where you can download it you'd be like oh nobody bought your film right but now we're at a place where at least with stand-up yeah i put my special on youtube it's like oh yeah that's where you go watch stand up yeah i wonder if that happens to movies now and then it gives opportunities to some like filmmakers who never got a shot in hollywood but they're [ __ ] sick and they could kill it and now that barrier of entry is much less yeah yeah i think that i think that was starting already yeah it was for the most part i'm only paying for movies at the theater if they're like movies i would want to see at the big time yeah big big budget special effects superhero movies are perfect that's why they were so bankable yeah because people will pay for this furious game [ __ ] x man i remember joker i was i remember being surprised like yo joker made a lot of money at the movie theater and it doesn't seem like the kind of movie that you could have put that [ __ ] right to the crib yeah and we would all watch joker at the crib yeah yeah i don't know i'm really curious to see what happens with cinema man the next few years post corona is going to be like because these fascinating these you know and we'll move on but like these companies what are they called these like studio these film houses i don't know what you've heard of them studios film house whatever they are they gotta be [ __ ] themselves because they have these movies made yeah like the newest who's the guy that made the dark knight rises and all those that's for nola nolan has a new movie called i think tenet or something like that it's with uh denzel washington's kid right and that's probably 100 million dollar budget 200 million budget he has a finished movie yeah with nowhere to [ __ ] put it yeah so they're just sitting on 200 million dollars spent waiting for a time when they can recoup that's a lot of money to wait on yep i mean do you just go vod you know how much you lose but you might have to be forced to a situation where you have to recoup no you can't go to theaters right now you cannot go theaters and a nolan movie needs to be theaters because of the budget that goes into it yep it's a tricky time man it's a tricky time anyway let's do one more thing and we get out of here okay um by the way y'all if you want to um continue listening with us we're gonna drop another episode on our patreon we drop it every single friday and uh it just it just it was patreon.com flagrant too um we just want to let y'all know all the patrons all the [ __ ] army patrons that are listening right now that um we're officially the biggest comedy patron in the world let's go okay the biggest in the [ __ ] world so thank you all so much for doing that um and if that isn't enough proof or evidence that the patreon is absolutely [ __ ] unfiltered and wild and crazy and insane if that is enough proof i don't know what is i don't know how else to prove to the people that haven't joined on yet let's go anyway thank you all so much for making that happen man it's unfucking real man biggest in the goddamn world we've grown so much you might not know this but i was homeless when we started ah and now he has a home yeah and now you might be moving again might be moving on [ __ ] might be coming to the city boy might be anyway let's do one more topic and then we got to get out of here um you want to talk about this uh wuhan i was thinking we could talk wuhan but we could also talk about my man biden oh let's do that keep on gaffing yo ryden was talking to cardi b no clue why that even happens kamala told him probably nah but like cardi's been like this like part of the you know liberal uh democratic machine machine it's really interesting and i wonder if they cut a deal with her i'm sure because remember she had a charge remember cardi got a charge she got she was wrapped up in that whole like um what's the girl brim that we had on oh star bro she was wrapped up in the whole star brim thing and i think there was like a racketeering type of case that was attached to it i don't know there's a lot of allegedly's out here but that [ __ ] just went away remember she also had a charge for like attacking someone in a strip club or something like that yeah it was like some stripper that was talking [ __ ] about her sister i believe and they got into a little altercation yeah all the stuff about her like drugging guys and like taking their money oh yeah allegedly there was some allegedly drugging guys and taking them so a lot of this [ __ ] popped up right and it looked like there was going to be you know actual legal recourse right they had charged her with crimes yeah these crimes seem to have gone away and i wonder if the deal is hey you've got this massive platform you have tons of influence you're going to talk to bernie sanders when we ask you to you're going to talk to joe biden when we ask you to you're going to do whatever it takes to continue to push this agenda forward this is again just conspiracy theory right but it seems reasonable yeah and i bet you this is not the first time the united states you know government or certain politicians have cut deals with influential figures yeah right like who's probably the most prominent one can you think of any times where like the government may have cut a deal with prominent influential figures that's so funny agendas seeing her with this polish ass suit and like trying to make her dyed red hair look like oh that's a wig for sure sophisticated like yeah yeah it's gotta be a wiggy right but anyway long-ass nails yeah so she's out there uh doing her thing and joe biden i guess they're talking about kids or something like that joe biden says you telling me about uh kids i've got um five grandkids he has seven grandkids i don't have any grandkids yeah do you forget how many you have i feel like after a certain number you just be hey man that's a lot it's just a lot i understand forgetting names i do understand that yeah but how many you got and it's not like you got 14 and you say you got 13. that's true that's true five seven i mean you ain't gonna claim the ones that you don't like probably don't like that's true one his kid had one with some uh hoe yeah no like he had a little side baby yeah right and then yeah so maybe okay now we're down to six but then it's six legits one of them probably an [ __ ] you know what i mean i mean it is not look i'm not trying to just bash biden even though we absolutely should because this [ __ ] clearly has dementia and we're about to potentially elect him as president of the united states of [ __ ] america i mean that's crazy that's absolutely crazy thing yeah like other countries have to be going what the [ __ ] is going on over there right i mean i'm sure they've been insane they've been saying that yeah like when we elected trump they're like what the hell's happening and now we're they're gonna we're gonna like a dead guy yeah this weekend at bad guys yeah so it's like i don't [ __ ] know i it almost seems like we're like laughing these things off like oh here's another gaff it's like why this is not funny this guy got the the nuclear but i'm not as worried because there's a competent person behind him when has a vp done anything in this case you can do everything yeah no no vps don't do [ __ ] no traditionally i agree with you i think in this case they were like look he can get us the moderate white vote who's a little racist but doesn't want to commit it i'm talking about doing the job so once he gets elected we get a vp that's competent and you can think what you want about kamal's politics and who she is as a person whatever there's no denying she is competent enough to do the job yeah whether or not you're gonna like what she does who knows but get him he'll get the votes he'll get elected she gonna run the show behind the scenes in the same way i think george w bush didn't really run the show behind the scenes it was rumsfeld and whoever the [ __ ] and cheney and all these people he had behind a lot of people say cheney's the one that took us to iraq and all that [ __ ] yeah for sure yeah that's what kamala's going to be but hopefully you know for good and real talk obama's still pulling all the strings there like right now all the people biden has around him is former obama cabinet people so it's like it's just going to be another obama third yeah really justifying that we're going to put a man with dementia in office like this is crazy to me like y'all are y'all justifying right now like put a [ __ ] celebrity guy in the office like the guy has his brain i would rather somebody with their brain no than someone without their brain it's not ideal no experience in politics whatsoever who cares if you're brain dead you also have no experience in politics you've forgotten all of your experience in politics but what if you do have competent people around you that can just make you do whatever boom that's everybody he's the manchurian candidate but [ __ ] bro i don't know i don't know man like if instead of being under brain control there was no brain to control that's joe biden no i just can't i can't support it i think some people are looking at this like okay we can either get a bad person in office or a senior a senior person with good people around them but how do we know those people are good because they're like obama's cabinet or whatever like that i think that's the way some people are assessing it who is in obama's cabinet that's helping i mean none of us know let's be honest none of us know country wasn't in the shape it is right now when obama was president i think the country is in this shape because of corona also kamala's already been with a senile guy in his 60s made that relationship work she could do this again she profited off that america are gonna profit off this that's a good point fair enough fair enough and we are really voting for kamala we need a host we know it doesn't look like it's gonna last that long so it's like yeah bro cnn put out this tweet it said joe biden made the pick that maximized his chances of continuing to make the race a straight referendum on trump while also selecting someone whose resume suggests being ready to step in if and when biden decides to step aside when in the history of american politics have they ever suggested that a potential incoming president was gonna step aside if and when i don't what do they know that we don't know he's dying we all know this we all see this he's dying his brain is dead it is weakened at bernie's but it's a joke it's we can abide i'm telling you this is a dead person but it's unprecedented we're also in unprecedented times i think i took that as he only plans to be a one-term president so i took that as he's gonna die in nine months yeah the guy's dead and i and i have looked at everything and and i'm like if i vote i'mma vote biden and kamala yeah that's that's what that is [ __ ] man i got you bro anyway listen good luck man i i would rather honestly i would rather just say hey you know what kamala is the one she's gonna run and then give us your platform so we at least know what we're voting for yeah no the problem is a lot of people aren't comfortable voting for that they were comfortable with biden it's about the white moderate vote you always say that why the [ __ ] are they comfortable with a guy who's dead they're not smart people no you gotta vote most people shouldn't be allowed to vote this isn't racist i really believe this no you can keep this i think about 20 of of human beings should be allowed to vote yeah that's a powerful thing to vote we shouldn't just trust every idiot over here someone said the socrates said that or plato said it said that there's nothing i'd be saying without realizing it sometimes anyway philosophies hypotheses yeah all right guys listen thank you guys so much for uh listening to this episode of flagrant too that's been us uh it for us patreon.com flagrant2 if you want to come kick with us on friday man yeah friday um we will see you all over there we appreciate y'all best dressed comedian in the game hands down thank you i appreciate that man love y'all i love you all for confirming that and thank you guys all for participating and losing so we love y'all have a great night
Info
Channel: Flagrant 2
Views: 388,791
Rating: 4.8183942 out of 5
Keywords: andrew schulz, andrew schultz, comedy, comedian, stand up, flagrant 2, sports, entertainment, pop culture, commentary, comedy club, near me, jokes, interviews, akaash singh, alexxmedia, alexx media, alex media, eddin, eddin media, Thankyoueddin
Id: iWkfNpfrQUk
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 124min 47sec (7487 seconds)
Published: Tue Aug 18 2020
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