I'm Not Strong Enough - The Masculinity of Mr. Incredible

a man should be strong this is widely accepted since the time when we hunted mammoths with sticks and stones there has been no shortage of voices proclaiming this assertion but why to what end and for that matter what does it mean to be strong especially in our modern world to answer these questions we will examine the character Arc of an early 2000s animated Dad no iro sorry not you you're going to have to ride the bench on this one it's time for Robert par also know known as Mr Incredible to step into the spotlight and show us the true meaning of masculine strength now superheroes are obvious Prime examples of virtuous strength in their purest form they represent the best of us the epitome of humanity both physically and morally when might and right combined we observe the best that men can be Mr Incredible is such an archetype a man of immeasurable power and endurance who lives to serve others and one with the ability to live that life of service without restraint that is to say he is at the beginning of the story enough in any given situation he will emerge Victorious this is demonstrated as he simultaneously rescues a cat from a tree and stops a speeding car full of gunmen lesser men might have ignored Granny's plight and focused on the higher priority but not Mr Incredible his strength will Triumph every single time he truly can do it all thank you Mr Incredible you've done it again yeah you're the and the first scenes wrap with him having it all he's a superhero at the top of his game married to another superhero at the top of her game and as the next Pixar movie puts it life could be a dream and then that dream unravels in the space of a single voiceover the next thing you know Mr Incredible is working a soul sucking job driving a tiny car and dealing with all the mundanities of Normie life with no opportunity to do what he loves most except for on Wednesday bowling nights it's worth noting that Bob par Works assumably chose to work for an insurance company an organization that in theory is is there for the people when they are at their lowest is there to lift them out of suffering and restore their hope for the future but in reality is just milking their premiums for profits and forcing their employees to pay for office supplies and electricity used Helen's upbeat line go save the world one policy at a time honey as he's having to explain to this poor old lady that her claim is denied serves to emphasize the dichotomy between who Mr Incredible was who he thinks he still should be and who Bob par is now he longs to use his or I guess Supernatural strength to protect the weak but he's being forced to use a tiny fraction of it to stamp red ink on their appeals in this we see the established virtue of Mr Incredible he knows what his strength is for there's no temptation to use it for his own selfish gain at the expense of others like with all virtues however Prudence is required to properly order self-service Mr Incredible is zealous in his desire to help others to the point that he well yeah I think the guy might need a chance to let loose now and then a lot of pent up energy there one of the most wonderful aspects of this character is that he wants the right thing for the right reason but he struggles with his inability to actually have that thing for miking room in his psyche for other priorities and responsibilities that have replaced it and he's not completely right nor totally wrong in that desire legal or illegal Mr Incredible still has the power to help others and choosing whether or not to act when live are on the line is not a decision to be made lightly I don't know how you could live with yourself if you chose to go bowling and then found out eight people had died in that fire I also don't know how you could live with yourself if you missed your kids growing up if you deprived them of a father either because you simply were not present or because you made a fatal mistake what is a man to do when faced with such a choice night after night well lying to your wife probably isn't a good start it was just a little workout just just stay loose that's absolutely not what it was and that's absolutely not why it was Bob dragged Lucius into that burning building because he has to be a hero because hero work is the one thing that satisfies and fulfills him because saving others is the only way he knows how to put his strength to good use because it's how he finds purpose but he can't tell Helen that how could he do you want to look the wife that birthed your three children straight in her face and tell her that you don't find your life with her fulfilling that you feel purposeless and lost yeah I didn't think so none of this is to say that Bob is a bad man A bad husband a bad father but rather simply that he is of all things a normal one he is clearly trying to love his wife and kids as best he can important is that mommy and I are always a team we're always United but he has goals and dreams Beyond his family life as is normal and quite healthy for men but his lack of ability to work toward those aspirations erods his ability to meaningfully engage with his family he is distracted at the dinner table by news of missing ex supers yeah he bickers with Helen about his lack of presence and his obsession with the Glory Days this is not about you Bob this is about Dash his home office is a shrine to the bygone past whereas Helen's awards from her superhero days never even see the light of day until 3 years after they move the last three years don't count because because I finally unpacked the last box it's tempting to say that Bob should let the past be the past that he should simply buckle down provide for his family and do what he legally can to help those in need and those are all wonderful virtuous masculine things for most men they should and would be enough but this is not any man this is Mr Incredible so it's no Small Wonder when opportunity comes knocking when the possibility to provide for his family while also finally getting to put his strength through its proper use comes up that he jumps at the chance how could he say no he can in one Fell Swoop relive The Glory Days do what he loves doing most and bring stability to his family what man wouldn't say yes to such an offer in the space of 10 heartbeats it's not as if there's any moral issue here either he's going to a remote island to fight a robot that is threatening the people living there all he has to do is let Helen know what's going on and the company is sending me to a conference oh so the whole mommy and I are always a team that's out the window I guess but why well I think the first reason is quite obvious and not so great Bob knows his wife wouldn't approve of the supposedly from a secret government agency Mission delivered by a pseudonym on a self-destructing iPad who legally doesn't exist because you know clearly something isn't quite right in that situation second and more to Bob's credit he's trying to protect Helen considering the recently completed move not to mention the fact that they're not exactly seeing eye to eye at the moment he would rather not rock the boat anym than he absolutely has to is it the right decision no lying to your spouse tends not to be but we know Bob does love Helen and wants her to be safe and happy can't do that to my family again everyone just got settled out don't make so his motives here while certainly flawed are not entirely selfish if Helen went on believing that everything was hunky dory at insure care and Bob was simply climbing the corporate ladder it would be easier on her the problem is loving someone does not mean choosing what is easiest or safest for them but rather what is best for them but we'll come back to that point near the end of the story for now we finally get to talk directly about this video's main theme strength that is getting absolutely jacked this Montage after Mr Incredible's first mission is basically a commercial for the motto hit the gym you'll look better you'll feel better your relationship will improve there's pretty much no downside all of that is probably true for about any dude but we owe it to ourselves to ask one simple question why am I getting swo you may have noticed that Bob didn't choose to get into shape until he had a practical reason to do so now I'm going to take a wild guess and say that most of us nerds won't need elevated levels of physical fitness in order to provide for our families and if you do your jaw probably getss you there without requiring you to hit the gym so is it pointless for us to bother Pumping Iron at all no of course not strength always has a purpose even if not quite so obvious as it is here for one thing you never know Bob's first encounter with the omnid dry might have gone a lot better if his waistline didn't require extra suction to fit into the drop pod it's far better to have it and not need it than it is to need it and not have it then you have the element of self-improvement which is always worth pursuing you don't have to want to look like the termin himself but you should strive to look and feel better than you did yesterday you'll have more energy your mental health will improve and seriously work out Jens do it for her but you know you actually need to do it for her and this is the Crux of the issue in The Incredibles this is why it's a movie I return to time and time again why it sits a top my personal Pixar pyramid of perfection the movie is at its heart about a husband learning to truly love his wife and his family as they deserve to be loved to love someone means to seek their good and to give of oneself unconditionally but that doesn't preclude any and all focus on one's own well-being at least on some basic level we have to take care of ourselves before we can take care of others you cannot give what you do not yourself have if you have no food how can you feed other people if you are unhappy how can you spread cheer if you don't have a purpose how can you help others find theirs as it turns out sometimes the best thing you can do to improve your relationships is take care of yourself to the point that you are then able to care for those you love that's what this whole montage is about Bob is finally able to be Mr Incredible again or at least he's on the path back and his renewed sense of purpose brings with it a revitalized fervor for family life it is undeniably and obviously healthy for his marriage and his role as a father but not complete because of course none of this would have happened if not for a lie and lies between spouses tend to have consequences so after Helen discovers Bob's sec sec thanks to Edna she receives this advice you will show him you remember that he is Mr Incredible and you will remind him who you are throughout this story Bob has lived in Two Worlds in one is Robert par corporate drone and middle class father with a beat a oldold car and in the other as Mr Incredible a superhero with no rival among man or machine and never the twain shall meet but that State of Affairs cannot be allowed to continue those responsibilities are each individually too powerful their pulls will cause a separation you remember this moment important is that mommy and I are always a team you should because it's the third time I've played it at the time they were pretty Hollow words as Mr Incredible was a self-proclaimed solo artist and husband and wife had in fact been having a rather spirited argument about Bob parr's participation or lack thereof in Family Life nonetheless there was truth in those words behind them was the memory of a promise made years before as long as we both shall live no matter what happened assumedly the two never got a chance to really be a team as they had planned as the lawsuits disrupted superhero life immediately after their marriage and while working together to build a family is wonderful and Incredibly fulfilling it's no Small Wonder Bob found it not enough and perhaps he was right to feel that way that's not to excuse his lackluster parenting but rather to say that Bob was justified in Desiring to use his talents for their intended purpose and his struggle when doing so became impossible is entirely understandable and reasonable being held back from our goals and Pursuits especially when what we seek is good and righteous will provoke a legitimate sense of frustration Bob doesn't just help people for a living He is Mr Incredible Helen is elastic girl this is an underappreciated moment in the movie if you ask me as much as Bob has to realize that he cannot be the hero he once was at least not in the same way he once was Helen has to understand that she still can be that she still is a superhero her strengths her gifts should not remain hidden away from the world if the world needs them if her family needs them self-actualization gets her bad rap in modern media criticism and I've given the concept A lot of Guff myself but that's because the potential reached by many self-actualizing characters nowadays is a selfish innan one self-actualization is shown to be this Bland I don't need to change brand of self-acceptance and nothing more in The Incredibles both main characters become self-actualized but only through each other yes they are Mr Incredible and Elastic Girl each in amazing individual who has their own worth but they are also Mr Incredible and Elastic Girl the two are one they just have to act like it being a part of a team means that the individual is not enough that you need help and well I mean Mr Incredible calling for help lame lame lame lame lame thank you syndrome for highlighting my point the man who has to call for help is weak and ineffective or so the villain of the story would have you believe that is of course ridiculous but our protagonist who has always emerged Victorious due to his own Merit it wouldn't sound quite so silly admitting that you are not enough that you need someone else strikes quite the blow to our masculine Pride why do you think so many dudes got lost before the invention of Google Maps Le Ericson only discovered America because he refused to ask y m Gander for directions back to Iceland strength is not absolute true strength requires humility accurate self- knowledge and the ability to acknowledge our own shortcomings strength before weakness it is the duty of the strong to protect the weak the strong stand before the weak in between those unable to protect themselves and those who would do them harm they allow the weak to survive so that the weak might become strong you never know when your own weakness might require the strength of another that brings us to the movie's final showdown no no not that one this one I'm asking you to wait with the kids and I'm telling you not a chance you're my husband with you the entire movie has been building to this conversation from Mr Incredible's perpetually triumphant strength to his failures as a husband and father to his Rejuvenation and Redemption as a hero to the moment where he thought his wife and children lost forever his character has been brilliantly set up for this moment he has reclaimed his title as Mr Incredible but now he knows one fact he'd never known before I'm not strong enough Mr Incredible can't do it on his own he wanted to he tried to he aspired to be a hero for the world and for his family letting his wife and children rest in Blissful ignorance and safety and he failed only because he relied on his own strength and his strength alone if we work together you won't have to be top 10 moment in cinematic history it's perfect it's brilliant it's everything I could have ever wanted from a film our strength is not enough even when it is rightly ordered and aimed at a good and true purpose it will ultimately fail because it is not absolute it cannot hold back the tide indefinitely it will break in that moment we must rely on the strength of others that is not a weakness that is life the man who possesses virtuous masculine strength will acknowledge and accept his limits he will respect the agency and strength of others without letting it wound his pride he will let others love him as he loves them that is what is so beautiful about this moment in the space of a few words Bob and Helen expressed their love for each other in their own unique way you're my husband I'm with you for better or worse I can't lose you again and Bob in particular has to let himself be loved by his wife he comes to accept the best way to protect her to love her is to let her fight by his side finally husband and wife are a team here's the thing about strength it takes on a multitude of forms all of which need to be properly cultivated and ordered physical strength must be earned well in most cases through hard work physical pain and the denial of one's desire for comfort UT that's the easy part the emotional strengths courage perseverance Temperance Etc take significantly more work and yet they're even more necessary than is physical strength because without them said strength has no power if the strongest man of the world buckles Under Pressure what good is he what is the point of all those push-ups if you can't even lift a bloody log the log is of course not just a log but rather a placeholder for the lack of will to fight and lifting it is Bruce's way of showing that he has not given up but this isn't a the Batman video Mr Incredible's physical prowess was never in doubt even in his darkest moments it was still clearly there albe it buried a little but his emotional fortitude well the growth of that virtue served as the centerpiece of his character Arc is he changed from the man who was enough who could do it all every time to the man who was floundering hopeless and purposeless to the man who was once again convinced that he could do it all and then finally to the man who realized that he could not but who was willing to accept that his not being strong enough was not a flaw but rather the very thing that makes him Mr Incredible he cares

Channel: Master Samwise

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Id: x3nFXmIAd_M

Length: 17min 8sec (1028 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 30 2024