If You Carry a Gun, You Need an Outfit to Match - Kyle Kinane

I don't know I just think that if you need to have the gun there needs to be a dress code also you can't just have the gun and then where you need this the rest of this needs to match cuz not only you have a weapon you also have a very aggressive accessory now all right you have a centerpiece to your outfit it's the focal point and the rest of it needs to coordinate all right that's what I'm saying if you ever see a woman out with a tiara but no ball gown just like sweatpants that's a crazy person that's what crazy looks like that's not someone making sensible decisions no that's a woman just yelling out the Kremlin's stole my babies and everybody is like I don't even need to be in this Auto Zone right now I don't even do what did I need seat covers I'll get seat covers tomorrow I'm gonna let this weird or homeless princess find her children that's the same thing with a gun you can't just have that and then not this if you have a gun here the outfit needs to make you look like responsible member society like you know what you're gonna do if that gun comes out of the holster if there's a gun here this [ __ ] needs to look like John Wayne or Indiana Jones or Captain America I don't know something that people be like well he knows what he's gonna do with the gun if it's gotta come out of the holster I was in Colorado I saw a guy who's open carry right there and I saw that got the gun first and then I saw that was attached to some board shorts you have a weapon long pants says low-rent Johnny Utah's [ __ ] when you got a clip on there's some swim trunks with drawstring he's using drawstring to hold up the weight of a gun you know how tight you gonna pull those Frost now I know he's in a bad mood cuz his hips have been chafing all day and that's not the attitude you shouldn't have with a firearm walking around like I should have powder cuz I'm just getting all read on my hip bone what are you looking at stop looking at my calves and flip-flops I don't even own guns I know that if you're gonna draw down on somebody cuz you're one of those good guys with a gun that stops all that crime thank you so much for how often that's been happening [Applause] close toed shoes toed shoes well you're gonna be you're the one who's gonna stop a crime when you just you just undo just when you're taking out of the holster and then you just swish it around in your kiba's explain that to the cops when they get to the ceiling what happened here well I saw the perpetrator run out of the bank with a duffel bag full of loose bills so I deduced that he had robbed the bank and then porch diamo license open carry and so I want to pursue the suspect but what had happened kind of during that pursuit is I I Jamie Buffett myself running straight-up Margaritaville myself and blew out a flip-flop you don't solve Parrotheads right all right yeah anyway yeah shanked it I did I shanked it that one went off and one went off into the playground over there hopefully fingers crossed fingers crossed I was trying to do the right thing [Applause] you

Channel: Comedy Central Stand-Up

Views: 330,522

Keywords: Kyle Kinane, Loose in Chicago, Kyle Kinane Loose in Chicago, Kyle Kinane comedian, Kyle Kinane stand up, stand up comedy, comedy central stand up, comedy, comedians, gun, guns, weapon, dress code, aggressive, accessory, outfit, tiara, sweatpants, crazy, crazy person, John Wayne, shorts, flip-flops, open carry, good guy with a gun, shoes, closed toe shoes, holster, funny, funny video, comedy videos, funny jokes, funny clips, laugh, best comedy, best stand up

Id: Bbe7o-Cu4Y8

Length: 3min 51sec (231 seconds)

Published: Sun Jun 30 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/TheKronk]

I live in Colorado, can confirm open carry with board shorts is a thing that happens.

[u/ibuildthebest]

“I Margaritavilled it!” Definitely going to keep that one on hand

[u/MultipleManArmy]

Kyle Kinane is the best. Love this guy.

[u/minus_minus]

I’m pretty sure no “well regulated militia” would allow drawstring pants. 😂

[u/VolkspanzerIsME]

As a Floridaman, I feel personally attacked...

[u/AhpSek]

He knows an awful lot for someone who 'doesn't own guns.'

[u/Gal_Sjel]

I’ll have you know my board shorts carry perfectly fine and comfortably with my sticky holster!!