If we told kids the truth when they asked questions...

yeah i'm just getting ready for uh for work son um before i go play fortnite um where did babies come from sweetheart babies come from when a man and a woman fall in love they spend a little time together and god blesses them with a little angel like you that's so sweet um where do we go when we die dad oh my god you know what i'm just gonna tell you the truth okay what happens when we die um news flash nothing uh okay nothing's gonna happen nothing good at least oh really literally you're gonna die your body's gonna begin decomposing to the point where even at your funeral we're gonna have to put makeup on you we're gonna have to pay a mortician thousands of dollars to make you look less dead and then we're going to put you on the ground and you're going to rot is god so god's not real you're serious but wait if god's not real and nothing happens after we die then then why are you jewish and mom's christian yeah i'm not really jewish it's just my ethnicity and then your mom she i mean she's christian i guess but i mean one of the religions is wrong anyway even if i was jewish so one of us is gonna burn in hell forever wait yeah you have to pick the right one so you need to go to church with her or whatever i don't care but you gotta pick the right religion or you're gonna burn in hell forever we won't be the ghetto if your mother's religion is right i'm gonna burn in hell forever what happens if you're right then you're gonna burn in hell i'm gonna go to hell with your mom though at least what the hell what happens now this demon guy literally just lights you on fire forever it never stops like in that no point doesn't stop i i just i'm on fire forever yeah in fact it's so long the eternity is so long that your life is smaller than adam in terms of length of time to the whole universe being the hell so you'll probably just forget about your life and all you will know is pain is there a way not to die gotta get ready for it what was i before i was born dad ah you were calm okay come oh and uh do you wanna you asked where babies come from the beginning that was a lie too um actually we had you on accident um babies come from when a guy gets horny and he has too many drinks and he takes home the ugliest girl at the bar mom mommy she actually comes inside of her you why to mommy a few months later i get a phone call from a woman who i don't even remember and says it's yours it's yours you gotta take care of the baby i go and i get a dna test and lo and behold the kid's mind that's you so you like didn't want me at all and also you probably think it's cool that your dad works at mcdonald's but i make minimum wage your friends older brothers make more money than me and i have i can't get a better job i can't do anything else with my life or go back to school because you were born on accident not because me and your mommy fell in love but because me and your mommy had sex in the back of a ford [ __ ] focus why'd you tell me that [ __ ] man i'm six years old this shit's hitting different now i can't distract myself with this i know it ain't real yeah you were uh what is [ __ ] much time you got before school i was gonna go play fortnite

Channel: Ryan The Leader

Views: 952,654

Rating: 4.9361787 out of 5

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Id: 3s_Y9M_ZoQ0

Length: 3min 37sec (217 seconds)

Published: Wed Dec 11 2019