Subtitles by: DontTouchMe, XavGamingX, kobecam and refined by other people. Enjoy! <3 Mm. Mm. As far as grass goes, this is incredible Am I right, lads or am I right, lads? You are right, lad. Both: LAD! Try and catch me, lad! Oh, I'll try and do that, lad! Moo (?) Huh? Oh, where am I going? Moo? Me and lad are just going to hang out Weren't we, lad? That is right, lad. Moo It's been months since I've left the Underground, Mom. Let's go, lad Alright, lad. * laughter * Lad... You know what we need? A montage. You are fucking right, lad! ♫ I'm never sad when I'm with my lad ♫ ♫ It makes me feel... so FAB! ♫ ♫ I'm never sad when I'm with my lad ♫ ♫ It makes me feel oh so rad! Lad~♫ * music fading out *
This is the best! * music fading out *
Am I right, lad? * music still fading *
Oh, you are right, lad. Lad? Flowey? What are you doing here? Well, since my Flowey the TV Show ended its run and I got bored of cat fishing cosplayers Well, technically they're cat fishing you. I mean, take away their costumes and TRUTH IS REVEALED MAN! Thought I'd come to see how my favorite zoo animal's doing. You are aware you're a goat, right? On special occasions Like birthdays Sometimes a guest appearance on weddings. Excellent... So what do you want? Well, child... I've come up with a new idea A REALITY TV SHOW! Huh, that sounds cool man! I want you to KILL EVERYTHING! Well that went south quickly... People love violence People love blood! Gore! Birthday cakes, too. Awh, cake, Lad! So I propose a deal to you, child I'm gonna RESET the world, 'cause I'm a God and I can do that, I'm a flower and stuff And you're gonna go back down into that hole and you are going to kill everything. You know what, Flowey? If you proposed this to me a while ago, maybe I would have accepted it But now I'm a pacifist. I'm finally at peace I get to eat grass all day I get to have intellectual conversations with my parents MOM UHH? MAA UHH! Not to mention my newfound best friend, the Lad. You are sweet, Lad. Well damn, ain't you a boring piece of shit now? TOO BAD THOUGH! 'Cause if you don't go down in that hole ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I'm gonna kill your giraffe parents! DUHH? I mean, I like my parents, but not that much.. Well then I-- I-- I'll kill everybody down in the underground! I don't negotiate with flowers. If you don't get your tushie down there I'm gonna kill Lad! Awh, no, Lad! NOOO! You can't do this, not Lad! It's like I always tell ya: It's a kill or kill be Fu-- FUCK'S SAKES! Lad... Fine. You've got a deal. HOOLY DELY Now I''ve taken these goons hostage, lets go find the hole. That's what she said, Lad! Or he said, depending on the situation Then again, these days, if 'it' said would be more appropriate. EXACTLY! Two genders. *TRIGGERED* Just shut up and follow me. Don't worry, Lad! I will save you!! Oh and you, too, Mom and Dad. I promise. NO NEW Exactly. Time for your new reality... TO BEGIN! WHY DIDN'T I BRING MY WEED KILLER?! Howdy! Bite me. Yeah, you gotta little red on ya. A bit of what, a bit of... OH GOD! Oh... Uh- ohh.. Ohh... Looks like you made your first kill, child. Stay back, evil creature! Yes! Toriel! Rest in peace, Flowey. Huh? HADOUKE- Holy shit. Yeah, her little hadoukens won't work on me this time! Jesus, she's like, proper dead. Like, PROPER dead. Now I'm gonna lay the rules down on ya. Good one. Rule number one: You can only use the method of killing once. Does that include getting crushed by the rules? For example: when you fell from the hole, you landed on this monster and you killed him. Woah, woah, woah, but hold on. Let's say I stabbed this guy. Like this thing here. So I just stabbed this thing in the head, yeah? Correct. But what if I stab this thing in the head twice Or, what if, I stabbed this guy in the leg THEN the head? Does that count? No. But it is different though, technically. Ehh, technically What if I stabbed this guy not as hard, but he still dies anyway? No, 'cause that doesn't-- What if I use two knifes, does that count, I'm gonna-- STOOOP! Look, I'll just be the judge and let you know if it's okay. This is really complicated. This is some next gen Gremlin shit. Rule number two: If a monster kills you, they win a million dollars, a hug from me, and everyone else in the underground dies. And this is a reality TV show? Genius, huh? What if I kill myself from boredom? Then I kill everybody. Including Lad! * sadly * Lad... Okay, rule three: Imma allow you to revive five of your companions What do you mean, like, like Sans? Alright matey face! If your face was a mate, it'd be a proper mate face. Okay you'll do, I guess. Oh, hey, by the way I've got loads of good skeleton jokes now Me and Papyrus made loads! DID SOMEBODY SUMMON ME? Definitely not. WHAT DO YOU CALL A SKELETON WITH NO BONES? A SACK. NYEHEHE! Why? WE MUST TELL UNDYNE THAT JOKE! NYAHHHHH! What joke? Oh god, it's Genderless Child Oh god, I'm flustering I didn't even ask for you! Wait one second, don't say Alphys, DO NOT SAY ALPHYS! Oh wait I said Alphys WHY DO I DO THIS TO ME?! Oh, *snort* great timing I just finished milking my cat *snort* Wait, that's my dead cat. Eh, tomato, toe-mah-toe Toriel Huh? Toriel, the last ally. Have I got something on my face? Rule number four: If any of your allies die, then rule number three will be in effect Frisk: So I get to add more allies if they die? Oh wait, shit, no that was num-- that was num-- that was number two, rule number two, yeah rule TWO will happen. Basically if they die, you die, okay? And if I die, everybody dies. Flowey: Three, two, one, go, good luck, have fun, bye Well, I'm going to the pub, see ya matey! I've got some more cats to milk *snort* Oh, Barry Nyahhh... YES. The nightmare begins. IF UNDERTALE WAS REALISTIC IF UNDERTALE WAS REALISTIC
GENOCIDE GENOCIDE God, I hope Lad's alright Yeah, sorry, I can't understand you, so I-- Don't worry child! I'll be your translator!(What happened to toriels face.) Oh great, I didn't know you spoke Buzz. Oh, I don't speak Buzz, but I do speak some Mandaclügaclegen Alphys also know some Mandaclügaclagaclegen That's right I do know some Mangaclangaclügen! You've said a different word every time. *a delightful conversation between each other* So what did it say? Hold on, let me tell your translator. So the beast's saying *snort* he hasn't been on a holiday in a - a really long time *throat noise* So that money will be valuable, because then he gets to go on a holiday and drink beer and stare at bees in bikinis *another throat noise* He also made a joke, it's a double bees *snort* GET IT? So according to Alphys' translation, the bee is saying it wants to-- I just heard Alphys, I don't understand what is happening I-- look just tell the bee I'm a pacifist, I'm a nice guy and I'm willing to reason here But if he's standing in my way, I'll have no choice but to attack him. Okay, okay. The child wants to kill the bee thing. *Alphys relays the information to Barry B. Benson* That is not what I said! He said you're uh, you're welcome to try. He said you're welcome to try. Screw it. I swear I'm gonna die of a mental breakdown before this is over. Death by stompin? Nice job, child. Very creative, very nice, very nice indeed. I give a 10 hooly delys out of 10 hooly delys. I'll be sure to write that down in my diary. Already ahead of you! *pig* Seeing as I enjoyed the kill quite a bit, child, I got a special treat for you Aw, man, is it a big, fat, dirty McDonalds? I could kill for one right now Literally, I just did, so if you did get me it I did technically kill for it, so. Nope! Even better! It's your parents! MEH Well that's underwhelming. And Lad. Lad? LAAAAAAD! Are you okay, Lad? I'm alright, Lad Flowey's not treating you bad, right, Lad? Nah, Lad, it's fine, Lad Oh thank God, Lad I know, Lad It's kinda creepy how much you love the lad. Lad.. I'm giving you 10 minutes, child, to kill the next enemy Or what? What are you gonna do? Um, well, I -- I -- I didn't think that far ahead But.. hum... Well if you do -- hm. Uh, I'll take of Lad's hat! You monster! I think you're exploiting this Lad thing a bit too much *snort* Shut up, nerd! Have fun, child! He said 'Bring it, pussy!' Oh yeah? The child says 'oh yeah.' *another intellectual conversation* Alphys: He said Lad is stupid. Toriel: He said Lad is stupid. He said Lad is stupid?! That's it. That's it. ('That's it.') How'd that big diving board get there? Don't question it. EAT MY ASSHOLE!! He said 'Ow, FUCK!' Worth it. Toriel: He said 'Oh fuck,' by the way. Oh man, the clock's ticking! Seriously, can you stop? That's really annoying. Thank you. *Froggit's say their name like rejected Pokémon* Oh, God, there's so many of them Let's scout the area Why are you talking to yourself? 'Cause I'm crazy, okay?! Froggit (x1) Froggit (x2) Froggit (x3) Froggit (x4) Fro- faggot, I mean Froggit (x5) Froggit (x6) K, well there's no explosive barrels around.. Boo. Be quiet, child These Froggits, they roam in gangs, these things have seen some shit They've seen comrades die They've seen every season of Rupal's Drag Race Jesus Christ Nah, not Jesus, mate Rupal *Death By Glamour. wait, no* So what do I do? I've got to kill all of these in ten minutes. *Sans casual death laugh* What do you call a skeleton who's a proper lad? Sans? Sans, yeah! Froggit! *frisks head twitching like a animatronic* *silence* Just follow me. Welcome to my utopia! Woah, you are packin'! No I'm not mate, I'm stayin' here I don't even own a suitcase Hey, Sans Sans: What's up, buddy, mate? What did the genderless child say to the skeleton? Um 'Cause he couldn't go to prom? What? No, n-uh. I had a cool line and you ruined it, so Sans: Oh, sorry mate
Frisk: Yeah, nice job
Sans: Uh. *awkward silence* Should we get the guns then or Yes, nob-head. *epic music playing while frisk and sans being badass* SMOKE WEED EVERYDAY You ready? I will be in a minute, Mate I got a proper wedgie going on It's right in my chocolate starfish, you know what I mean? No? It's like I've got a napkin shoved up there Oh wait, it was a napkin! Alright that was a close one. I stopped it with me face. *COD 5 sneak peek* I'm getting shot by a frog with a gun, what is my life? Returning fire! hng Oh wow I got him, shit, cool! Froggit! Let's take out the rest of these su-- wait hold on I can only use a method once, right? Due to my calculations and conceptions, yes. So all these guns are pointless, WE CAN'T EVEN USE THEM! Oh yeah. Heh. Aw fuck. Oh whatever! Fuck's sake, what else we got? Time for some death from above HAVE IT! Oh, fruit! AAAAHH aaaahh Why me? Get smashed! Smaaaaashed! Frisk: You can't shoot them again, remember? I know, but it's just pretty fun to shoot back, innit? Smash! My name's terrible anyway. Frisk: You don't say. *battle orders* Wait, hold on (Shoot the side there) (Bullet ricochets off) (Hits crane) (Crane falls) (Swoops down) (All targets eliminated) (Commencing.) Sans, take cover! Done! *that one scene in Rango where he uses one bullet to kill a bird* Really rango?) I love my life. *COD 5 looks, great doesn't it? Coming 2420* Death from above! What did I tell ya, mate? (Exist stage left.) (Don't get mad.) (Keep composure.) (Do not falter.) (Commencing.) What do you call a skeleton-- GO AWAY! Alright, Grouchy Pants, hehey! *sniff* Smells like me mum! Hit the bell, hit the bell right below! Uh YouTube is not notifying subscribers of the that videos we've been releasing If you want to know every single thing that we release hit the bell and YouTube will make sure that they send you every single video that we release moving forward Thanks for watching guys, leave a like if you watched the video and you liked it Thanks to all the subscribers watching right now Subscribe and hit that bell, we'll see you next week BETTER DO IT More episodes on the way
