I Conquered my Enemies With Pollution in Rimworld

in a world full of activism and eco-warriors I'm worried that we've never taken the time to consider the societal advantages of turning the planet into a nuclear Wasteland personally I think we should give this pollution thing a chance that's why for this challenge I will use my colony of specially designed AB humans to generate and spread industrial amounts of pollution across the planet but what does that mean well in rimworld pollution is generated as an unwanted waste product from certain types of Robotics and power generators now a lot of people don't like pollution and they'll tell you it's no good because it Alters the environment and leads to some very interesting evolutionary dead ends additionally if you spend too much time in polluted areas you will become mentally challenged and develop terminal cancer I'm not kidding but luckily for us I managed to genetically engineer our colonists to benefit from toxic environments now it's a bit of a zero-sum game when it comes to Gene altering so in order for us to become immune to pollution we had to make a few sacrifices for example we are overall pre-cambrian hyper aggressive inbred fatsos suffering from major cell instability but at least we can spit acid but enough monologuing let's take a look at these characters first we have our three starting mutants Grim gnarly and Biff they're all dangerously overweight but adequately skilled in fields such as farming construction and crafting I selected our final character from the comments section on my last video unfortunately I spelled his name wrong because well I was drinking but it's too late to fix that now so cliart kylert whatever just consider it a cool dyslexic pseudonym kylert will be our leader as well as our head researcher technically he's not a mutant he's a waster which makes him genetically superior to the rest of us but he's also a filthy drug addict who will die if he doesn't ingest psychedelics on a regular basis so we better get to work we crash landed on our tile and once we settled on a reasonable area to call our home we christened it by placing an industrial strength pollution device this one doesn't even do anything for us no power generation no fancy robots just filthy filthy pollution 24 7. with the ground now looking considerably more cancer inducing we are prepared to plant our crops toxic potatoes are the disgusting bastard child of the normal potato plant and they have a very high chance of making us sick but it's the only food we can grow in polluted areas so we're going to have to get used to it additionally we can grow some psychedelic plants which can later be refined in order to feed Kyler's metabolic drug independency aside from this we developed the usual trappings of any normal society our research bench barracks and even a small Chapel dedicated to the worship of environmental destruction the first thing I wanted to research was the toxagenerator not only does it produce electricity but it also spews out enough toxic fumes to make you enjoy Amy Schumer's comedy come come come [ __ ] that's a lot of toxic fumes to be inhaling and our colonists are loving every second of it you see I want this entire map to be so goddamn polluted that enemy Raiders will develop a radiation sickness within seconds of arriving and with this bad boy we can get there the only issue is that unlike solar panels these toxic power plants are distinctly non-renewable now I'm not going to lie despite my forklift certification I don't really understand the science but it seems like these generators are sucking the life force directly from the planet itself because once all the tiles in their radius are fully polluted the generator simply shuts off we can't afford to have our power grid go offline that easily so the key here is to use a pollution cleansing unit to offset the pollution produced by our generators thus keeping a small pocket of the environment in a constant state of contamination and Recovery this will allow us to continue producing power indefinitely it's kind of like using a defibrillator on someone just so you can kill them again so that's great we can keep our lights on and thanks to a perpetual cycle of environmental suffering the only issue is the process of cleaning pollution actually creates toxic waste packs and since we optimized our power grid perfectly we basically have an infinite supply of toxic waste I don't know why we're containing class 4 carcinogens in a plastic garbage bag but regardless I decided to store them in the freezer with our food until we could find a better use for them I know that seems like a bit of a convoluted way to generate electricity but I'll tell you one thing it [ __ ] works yes I can already feel it the air has the same thickness as a jar of a cigarette flavored peanut butter and it feels amazing but while I was enjoying the process of developing brain cancer I realized that something was wrong some of our crops had started to die because apparently they weren't polluted enough you may recall the first thing we did when we got here was to create a pollution machine to toxify this entire area I figured we didn't need the machine anymore so I just kind of got rid of it but as it turns out these dirty rat bastard trees are actually capable of a naturally filtering pollution out of the environment and they're slowly pushing our borders back honestly this is unacceptable and I'm entirely livid prior to this we were at war with the environment in a more indirect sense but now it's serious I had the colonists equip a couple of Molotov cocktails and we started a tasteful amount of forest fires as retaliation against the trees consider this a warning viewer trees are the enemy and they are always watching be proactive fight back the forests are on fire and our air quality is finally at Liberty to be as toxic as we want I suppose it's worth mentioning at this point that while kylert is totally immune to the harmful effects of pollution the mutants are only resistant to it meaning that if we don't take proper measures eventually they'll all become terminally autistic unfortunately gas masks can reduce pollution intake significantly this in combination with our mutants genetic resistances allows the wearer to be essentially impervious to toxicity the issue is we only have one gas mask so until we can fabricate some more it's going to have to be communal meaning that once someone develops critical levels of lead poisoning they've earned a few hours with the gas mask it's kind of like sharing an oxygen tank underwater you're all probably going to get a little bit of brain damage but at least you'll survive now in order to produce more gas masks we'll need some chem fuel which means we're going to need some trees unfortunately you may remember me flying into a blind rage earlier when I found out the tree population was trying to subvert our pollution plans so the map is looking pretty sparse on the wood Gathering front luckily we've managed to research a specific type of tree the Witchwood which will grow in polluted areas it's not a high yield tree at all but that's the price you pay when you're an Eco Warrior like us we planted about 100 trees to account for the poor yield and while I was waiting for them to grow I received a notification that Grimm has developed dementia from uh natural causes we'll say personally I like to think of it as Grim ascending to a higher level of Consciousness and sometimes he just likes to wander around and forget his own name either way I decided to put him to work full time in the chemical Factory since that seems like a low risk job for someone who is demented as the trees finally started to grow we had a grim turn them into chem Fuel and narrowly used that in combination with some steel to create five gas masks now we don't have to worry about choosing between oxygen and brain tumors I think our society is really shaping up we are running into a small problem though some government bodies might refer to it as a starvation or even a famine I prefer to think of it as extreme dieting but either way the lack of food is really aggravating our colonists I began a hunting program to try to supplement the food supply because once people start having complete mental breakdowns this game becomes a 400 percent less enjoyable this is is an entirely temporary solution because the more homosexual frog chemicals we pump into the water table the more we pollute to the local animals and eventually their meat will be so tainted it won't even be edible but for the time being it's it's probably fine we are now locked in a death spiral with the very planet we live on we are trying to suffocate it through pollution and it is trying to kill us through starvation only time will tell which side will prevail but in the meantime I thought we could engage in a productive little side quest you see years of hyper aggressive inbreeding have led to our colonists looking intensely European and I feel bad for them however all things are relative and if we can make everyone else less beautiful than we have effectively made ourselves more beautiful for this reason I've decided to kidnap anyone unfortunate enough to wander into our territory once captured we will conduct a series of medical procedures to bring them down to our level oh and look what we have here our first patience we kidnapped them and whisked them away to our state-of-the-art learning hospital it's a learning hospital because our own only doctor is a retired bartender and he's still learning this whole medicine thing now thanks to the war crimes 2.0 mod we have an array of torture methods that would make even the CIA blush for example we could disfigure our patient with acid but even I'm not that cruel instead I opted to replace all of our patients limbs with wooden logs and lobotomize them somehow the mortality rate for this routine procedure is nearly 100 but either way it's great practice for kylert now you don't need me to tell you this but despite all of our humanitarian work it's a cruel world out there so it's time to start learning gun manufacturing I'm not talking about making some pissy little revolver either I'm talking about toxic mini guns a lot of people think this Eco Warrior thing is a metaphor that's their first and last mistake kylert got to work on the research and Biff crafted the gun and in case you're wondering yes it is crafted from the toxic power plant waste technically that counts as recycling the next person that tries to audit our Colony for a carbon tax will be received leaving more depleted uranium than Iraq and not only does it kill it also pollutes once we get two or three of these operational it's all over for the ozone layer additionally I figured we could craft some talks packs which are basically backpacks that deploy a toxic smoke screen in a defensive radius around the wearer it's kind of like tear gas except it also causes our enemies to go into organ failure between the miniguns and the tox packs I think our military is in a great place now aside from our recent advancements in Gunsmithing and starvation we do have some troubling news despite the hard work of our marketing department no one seems to want to join the colony something about the air scorching their lungs I I don't really know the point is we need more visitors and it's time to change our approach imagine this instead of seeing an advertisement to visit Florida you are attacked in a parking garage by a man wearing a Hillary Clinton mask and you wake up in Florida horrifying I know but effective we will be adopting this latter approach but fortunately we'll only be taking you to a cancerous hellscape and not Florida so we'll be kidnapping a few people maybe making a few slaves and sure they'll have a hard time surviving the climate but if they do a good job they might be able to earn a gas mask which they have tremendous incentive to do because it's followed New Vegas for as far as the eye can see so with minigun in hand we set out to look for viable candidates for forcible relocation you might think non-consensual adoption is immoral but isn't it more immoral to deprive our neighbors from experiencing the glory of this Utopia in your heart you know this to be right we traveled to a nearby settlement where we found a group of tribes people that looked very susceptible to being shot into submission and so we did just that and with two new recruits kidnapped we made our way back to the septic tank that is our base this was a phenomenal outcome all we have to do now is break their will and formalize them as slaves my favorite way of doing that is by giving them leather slave harnesses and seeing how long it takes them to figure out its human leather fortunately it didn't take long and they joined our Colony I assigned them to fairly menial labor such as harvesting crops cooking and cleaning I'm not sure if cleaning is even possible when I'm spewing eight kilograms of chromium dust into the atmosphere every hour but if nothing else the constant uphill battle will build character in addition to this I found out that we can also host orgies at our church and if they're fun or Unforgettable there's a 50 chance that a colonist of the same religion will join our Colony this is how we managed to recruit Jeb between kidnapping and government-mandated orgies I think we're going to be a recruiting Powerhouse I gotta say sometimes lobotomizing tribes people and melting the ice caps feels like thankless work but at least we have the support of the church speaking of which I think we should conduct some rituals to celebrate our recent successes as well as provide us some spiritual guidance on what to do next We Begin one of our most holy rituals a ceremonial flag burning known as the fire of Francis the ritual was honestly pretty mediocre but as part of the ceremony it narrowly sucked on the exhaust pipe of a running car for 30 minutes and it produced for him some very Vivid Visions gnarly came to the Revelation that it's not enough for us to be polluted the rest of the world must also share in this Enlightenment by force if necessary sharing our gifts is the least we can do as they say it is the greedy man who stirs up strafe but he who trusts in his filthy faith shall be enriched beyond all measure clearly this is divine revelation and definitely not carbon monoxide delirium with that we are now missionaries of pollution and our holy Crusade has begun we set out to nearby tiles to construct pollution machines I decided it would be unnecessary for us to properly colonize these tiles instead I placed my trust in the old adage build it and they will come after all who could resist this paradise the nice thing about this approach is that once a tile reaches 100 pollution it actually begins to passively spread pollution into adjacent tiles like a plague we will spread across this map slowly and then all at once despite the affordability of the pollution generators we are running low on components and so I transitioned our sleeves into the Machining room to produce more with time we were able to achieve 100 pollution saturation on all tiles adjacent to our base I've never been happier but it's still not enough our neighboring states looked down on our alternative lifestyle but this is nothing an industrial supply of chlorinated waste can't fix now they can't look at all for the neutral territories we utilize the inconspicuous technique of placing generators on their territory but disguising them as strip mall installations no one goes to strip malls and they smell bad so they'd never know the difference but over time their entire map would become just the right amount of disgusting I also experimented with pumping toxic fumes through their ventilation systems but this did not go over well with test audiences regardless we eventually managed to achieve 100 pollution on the three closest neutral settlements and it was starting to take its toll on them their crops wilted and acidic smog embraced their colony like a warm sweaty hug the citizens fate painted out of Joy obviously their chances of survival are low due to their maladjusted genetics but if they turn to the Church of Filth we can show them the way you can come in the sink or sink in the come the choice is yours either way it's time to regroup back at home base and decide how to best prostheletize our more aggressive neighbors our closest hostile neighbors are the thoku treaty the Concord of Airway and gatch firehome despite our best recruiting efforts we're still a little undersized for a full-scale war this means we're going to need to be a little creative if we want to properly pollute our enemies that was when I looked out to our freezer full of toxic waste and realized what needed to be done why should we be hoarding 500 kilograms of human waste all to ourselves when instead we could strap it on a rocket ship and fire it at our enemies by researching drop pod technology we can craft a fleet of rockets load them up with toxic waste and then land the ships on enemy territory at which point they will release hundreds of waste packs assuming our enemies don't have industrial size freezers on standby the waste packs will then disintegrate and release a devastating amount of pollution across their entire map after a quick time lapse we got our hands on a couple of Transport pods originally I was only going to make two of them but then I realized there's not a lot of storage space in here so I multiplied by my lucky number 11.5 which gave us a total of 23 transport pods much better but then I remembered a carnival Gypsy once told me I'd be crushed to death by a ferris wheel on my 23rd birthday and so that seemed kind of unlucky I decided to err on the side of caution and double it and round to 50. we now have 50 transport pods each carrying 10 to 20 toxic waste packs sadly we don't get to witness the transport pods landing at the enemy base since we will have no colonists there to observe the event however I decided to fix this problem by cramming Jeb in the rocket among the piles of toxic waste now when it lands Jeb's gangrenous corpse will tumble out of the transport pod and allow us to view the enemy base so we loaded up our Rockets with Jeb and as much sewage as possible and punched in the coordinates there's actually a warning on these pods not to aim them directly at settlements as they may punch through the roof of small buildings and Crush people to death but actually I don't really care we launched the rockets and our clandestine payload is now on route to our enemies the Armada of Airborne garbage trucks landed gracefully upon the enemy map at which point Jeb escaped along with about 700 pounds of toxic waste understandably the Raiders were upset with his development and decided to engage in a mature conversation with Jeb about the importance of proper waste disposal unfortunate for Jeb but that's what you get when you join a colony based on the quality of their group sex anyway the toxic waste packs disintegrated over time coding the entire enemy base in filth and detritus Additionally the disintegration of hundreds of waste packs eventually resulted in a bug infestation which spawned a spellaped who proceeded to eat the local townspeople you guys can thank me later I'm sure they'll be able to clean the place up eventually but for the time being they can consider this a free trial of our religion I decided that this was a sufficient holy judgment for that settlement but honestly the airway tribe has been our greatest Nemesis throughout this entire playthrough they were always raiding us messing up my shots and I'm tired of it in the same way America was tired of Japan after Pearl Harbor so we're going to do something special just for them we're going to develop an actual nuclear warhead you could even call it a dirty bomb surprisingly it's not that hard apparently a single person can craft it by hand the only issue is we need a grain of antimatter since our particle accelerator is still in its infancy we're going to have to acquire it from other Civilizations for my research the best way to do this is to complete as many quests as possible and also explore the map for ancient ruins it took months of questing to acquire one of these bad boys hundreds of people had to die in the name of our God but eventually our persistence was rewarded with the holiest of relics now you might be wondering what happened in all that time not a lot really however I did come to the Revelation that we basically have an infinite supply of power and in my mind this Justified the creation of 30 mini turrets to defend the base so our society has been pretty stable ever since although unfortunately we did have one incident narrowly one of our starting colonists died of lung cancer you see he developed a tumor on his lung and we took him in for surgery kylert was the doctor performing his operation and during the surgery Kyler suffered a mental breakdown as a result of being kind of hungry this caused Kyler to forsake his Hippocratic Oath by flying into a blind rage and beating his patient to death while they were still under general anesthesia everyone else was away at the time so there was nothing I could do except laugh at it just how much paperwork would be required to justify this degree of malpractice sometimes these things just happen regardless we have our anti-green Warhead and it's time to make our mark on the world like any good nuclear warhead this one is launched from a short-range mortar so I had the fellas pack their bags and we traveled to the nearest settlement of the airway tribe they have a pretty nice base but not for long we set up the mortar loaded the nuclear warhead and prepared prepared for Judgment Day it was strangely empowering watching all these Godless sodomites Milling about their base completely ignorant to the reality that in mere moments an unmedicated fiend would change their lives forever it's time to fire the mortar is a one-person job and I awarded the honor of launching this nuclear bomb to our lucky viewer kylert he fired the mortar and the bomb flew gracefully towards its Target eventually landing and erupting into a fairly impressive explosion it leveled most of the buildings in the settlement and what it didn't destroy it coated in toxic sludge I wasn't sure what to expect but that was pretty nice and to you kylert you should be proud of yourself I know nuclear Armageddon may seem wrong but you're a goddamn hero in fact take this video and show it to your grandpa that fought in Vietnam and you tell him you're just as much of a hero as he is now and you understand why he screams at night watch him as a tear of Joy rolls down his face and he unlocks his wheelchair and rolls himself into the ocean you're a goddamn hero kylert a goddamn hero and with that I I feel we've completed our challenge we've embraced pollution thrived in it worshiped it spread it and weaponized it that's the full cycle of humanity right there now we can take our fellas back to enjoy retirement at the dump I want to extend a special thank you to this month's patrons you guys keep me going on these you know these long nights of editing and I really appreciate it finally thank you for watching know I'm not buying [Music] don't get me wrong [Music]

Channel: Reggie

Views: 720,035

Keywords: rimworld, rimworld biotech, rimworld pollution, rimworld challenge, rimworld mods, reggie, rimworld toxic world, rimworld toxic weapons, rimworld funny, pollution, toxic, rimworld waste, rimworld waster, i conquered my enemies with pollution in rimworld, rimworld gameplay, rimworld 1.4, rimworld game, rimworld war crimes

Id: GIUWA5PDnAo

Length: 21min 7sec (1267 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 11 2023