i became a mother that should be in prison

all right so we're checking out the only game where the most dangerous thing to a human being is a highly sharpened child it's happy wheels happy wheels is one of those games where the most dangerous thing to a person is more people and so today's theme is dangerous people you think i'm kidding when you get impaled by a line of children that's when you know things have gotten out of hand i know how there's just rotating kid blades down here i don't even know what winning this really means right richard you can do this well done now you just fall through all of the elves it's like a human conveyor belt am i about to explode because the children are are beeping oh god i think i'm gonna be okay i was wrong this is like the first playground made of only human beings it's the scariest place on earth okay i'm not gonna fail this time we just have to hold on for dear life don't let go don't let go yes what the hell [Music] i didn't realize that it's mobile while he's doing this okay we've we've got this this is a hundred percent right here i i guess dropped now victory i feel like this is one of those instances in a family where little sally's over here and she's like daddy is that man okay and he's like shut up keep holding your four brothers up i don't know how you beat this in 5.9 seconds it took me 5.9 seconds to process what the hell i was looking at i think that this one is particularly dangerous because the only danger in this entire board is myself this is going to be the new dui test when you're suspected of drinking and driving it's not an episode of happy wheels until a katana catches me in the balls look at this guy he's nodding he's like i know come on florida man this dude's like my pecker's like iron like a marconi baby all right maybe if i just tap it please god yes i'm still alive all right if i can just wiggle my genitals off of this sword all those ballroom dancing lessons came in handy yes go my son i got it rate if you think i deserve it well you just sterilized half of the population so here yes you do you deserve it i'm serious there are so many wieners that were skewered during the making of that board [Music] that is legitimately the first time i've thrown one ball and one but lord 420 i'm gonna give you at least a little bit of fulfillment hold on i never thought i would say this but i feel weird not dying so how do you die oh i love how my guy is just chewing on this battle axe like it's an ear of corn he's like i've been on a diet for so long i'll eat anything i've chosen this so i could show you all how improved my sword throwing skills are also why is this police officer dressed like ned flanders i feel like that outfit is not department issued for your khaki shorts you must die one two three look at that one shot all right senpai you're the last one we're doing this in two swords eat it okay technically both of those swords hit someone i heard it okay i call this this is a big arc throw i call it tasting the rainbow ready go okay what i was actually doing is i'm making a path so that i can walk over this bridge and stab him with my bare hands got him his organs were in the sky for like 10 full seconds and now they're finally raining down upon me this board here is called like 99.9 bajillion percent impossible when determining something's impossibility level i always like to send my daughter ahead to check for traps all right sally ready three two one lunch [Music] i'm not i'm not i don't know if i would consider that a victory i think that my child severed limb is slapping me in the face for being a terrible parent try it again there it is don't worry sally i'll save you i'll i'll bring you back over here to safety i won't let your exposed brain go to waste mom will complete this board all these kids are in the way i can't they keep they're very mobile i can't move anywhere i need to grab a solid object i can make this happen get out of the way oh that's only a piece of a child don't mind me just slide into home base while a brain slowly rotates [Music] oh my god bet you never saw a bottle run completely like that i think the worst part about this is that our entrails are forever kept in this loop because of this all right little tom hardy let's show this board who's boss don't drink and drive is that my son's leg yep it is okay we're gonna do this backwards got it no big deal the arm is still moving and okay my heart totally made it to the flag don't you ever give up timmy we're both gonna make it okay half of me is gonna make it my dad is so safe he still has both hands on the handlebars pogo stick for life okay pogo stick for death so if i slowly slide down this blade and i fall into the finish line julius here has one friend and that friend is gravity i thought he would fall down but his thick ass skull is keeping him here all right real quick sweeping dodge right there got it and sticks the landing okay i think i think like one i think one tibia stuck the landing we're gonna do this nope not that time right now nice i feel like that guy did this on purpose and the dodge got it [Music] oh i got it without even hitting the c yes without even hitting the ceiling i like that the game got so pissed off at me that only my heart got tossed out of the winner's area i'm taking that belt back to south florida a bit here we go watch out watch out gotta grab the belt yes from the top rope nice just getting over wall son he who pogo sticks the highest is a god i what how did i go through the wall my pogo stick so hard i can phase through solid objects hell yes oh i'm saving my replay didn't need that leg anyway [Music] [Laughter] i had to check something i feel like i wasn't supposed to just phase through the walls nice i got rid of most of my body it's helping out a lot okay maybe i won't try this one again i appreciate that my pogo stick could have landed anywhere on the entire board and it landed on my sack i have to survive the box oh okay does the watermelon have to come with me or what doesn't really seem that difficult okay things are starting to get a little bit more edgy here just kind of there we go pop up this do a little flip through the triangles of the nether realm okay that's just a randomly pulsating axe but the watermelon saved my life gotta slowly caress this ball here oh [ __ ] now the sword gets inserted so deeply into my rectum that my head pops off i've decided i don't actually need the pogo stick i'm just gonna lay down okay suddenly laying down isn't such a good idea this watermelon is my friend i will let no harm come to it not the ass not the ass okay i've got it if i keep my pogo stick right about here out of the way no no my watermelon killed by my own hand god it's like losing a family member god this this freaking board is like the cube 4d victory is mine just thought i would end it right after winning it was a lifetime of trauma watching my watermelon die over and over again i couldn't stand it anymore it's like the easiest pogo dodge i've ever done watch this boom [Music] i don't saw the pogo sticks only to die on a sharp corner in the sand wait for screen we don't wait for screens where we're going i'm just trying to beat the neck test over here i think i'm doing pretty good so far come on arms don't fail me now got it this guy's like all those injuries at the gym paid off i'm double jointed in my cervical vertebrae this is called the heart donate am i donating my heart or someone else's heart it's clearly my heart what the hell it's like some sort of rube goldberg fish my heart is being blasted back and forth knocked around by lasers and thrusters it's inside of a goddamn cannon i'm actually very curious who gets my heart in the end was that particulates of santa claus sitting over there oh that's nice heart donate 7v i i hate to see what happened to the other six that guy's on the hospital bed he's like this heart feels very depressed define ninja pro hell yeah wow i'm so pro that i died to a harpoon that was completely inanimate gray still plays mlg just let part of my body get there i'm okay i could still do this the second i let go i lose is there a harpoon tautly penetrating my groin yes but we can't give up here okay maybe if i like poop it out just let go of my ass okay how about if i if i give up the pogo stick and i i drag my way to freedom come on you can do it you know i maybe it's just me but it seems like every time i go to sit on a ledge part of my testicular package has to stay behind i don't know what it is about this game and having every single item heat seek to the groin we can make this don't you give up i will say while i did win i did not come out of that unviolated going for the bottle flip of the century wow if there's one thing i'm good at it's alcoholism okay i got the double bottle flip there it is i have to mention something real quick did y'all did y'all catch the triple bottle flip right before i got out of that board in this board you must go on a totally innocuous bike ride with your family where everyone's happy and no one gets hurt onward sorry little child my daughter just got crushed by her own lego tower to be fair that means it was a good lego tower out of the way i'm not gonna lie if it wasn't for this man right here that mine would have probably blown up well it did blow up one of my children but the other one's still fine onward susie hold on i'm gonna go back over here never forget young tom brady and his dad ned flanders i hear the sounds of organs being jumbled around in front of me all right we better do this quick here we go got it sticks the landing i find it interesting that to win i had to dump my daughter inside of this stupid well i guess i learned how to clean up the world which apparently starts by sterilizing the entire human race with harpoons to the genitals anyway folks hope you enjoyed this episode of happy wheels until next time stay foxy much love

Channel: GrayStillPlays

Views: 4,949,578

Keywords: Simulation Games, graystillplays, gray still plays, greystillplays, simulator, and this happened, tycoon funny, simulator funny moments, funny clips, funny moments, bad life choices game, funny simulator, simulation games, mobile game, stickman fight, stickman game, stickman games, happy wheels, happy wheels funny, happy wheels 2020, happy wheels banned levels, happy wheels levels, happy wheels don't move, harpoon jump, happy wheels worst mom, happy wheels gameplay

Id: gjCNUGgjij4

Length: 12min 19sec (739 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 26 2020