So you're gonna play Rogue, huh? Stealth murder assassin with a vendetta on killing things extra deader, staying in the shadows and shooting crossbow bolts from miles away landing TONS of damage "I swear I'm not the ranger!" Maybe you just really like Assassin's Creed and you want a character that pokes people with death and you know they'll instantly die with no screams of agony! Here's how to play Rogue! [boom] Rogue is a very straightforward class. There are only about two things you need to manage at level 1: Sneak Attack, and the fact that you're playing Rogue. All rogues come with an ability called Sneak Attack, where if you ever get the drop on the V I C T I M you get to do extra damage! You get this bonus when you're poking him right in his butt, if your buddy comes up and fights with you, or if you ever just straight up get advantage on your Attack roll. The more you level up, the more D6's you get to add to your sneak attack, and the more you get to keep pestering the DM for advantage in putting Ability scores improvements into Dexterity. That way you can take feats like Mobile, and be an assassin at level 3 and just NARUTO by your victims and do TONS of damage, while getting the ability to run away like a little BI- Also at level 1 you get Expertise, allowing you to pick two skills and double your Proficiency in them, because all Rogues have the natural-born ability to not only be pretty good at what they do, they are skilled artisans who perfect their craft to be unmatched by any other adventurer. Also known as: Free +4 to Stealth at Level 1 WOOOO! [knocking] "The cotton candy spray paint will illuminate the dink-dink!" "Alright." This is known as Thieves' Cant, a special language only other Rogues and Thieves can understand. At second level you get Cunning Action. As a bonus action, you can Dash, Disengage, "Pocket sand!" "AARGH!" or Hide. "STEALTH!" At level 3 you get to pick your Roguish Archetype. There are 3 different archetypes as demonstrated here, the first being Thief. This type of rogue can climb up walls, steal things quicker than your eyes can move, and can move faster than any other type of rogue. The second is Assassin. This one's a given. [STAB] [screams of pain and death] The third is Arcane Trickster, a type of rogue that uses magic to, "aid in their roguish abilities." "W-what?" "Wwwwwhaaat the fuuuuck..." "What the CRAP!" [magic rogue noises] At fifth level you get Uncanny Dodge, which allows you to dodge stuff better. (because your dexterity wasn't already high enough) And at 7th level you get Evasion, ...which allows you to dodge stuff better. So, when a dragon breathes fire on your whole party, incinerating them in one fell swoop, you can hip-hop away like nobody's business because Rogues are IMPOSSIBLE TO KILL. At 11th level you get Reliable Talent. Since rogues are masters of their skills and craft, they have spent meticulous time learning how to stay in the shadows, pick locks and uncover secrets. Rogues are the craftiest class in all of Dungeons and Dragons, getting great bonuses to their abilities to further their career. Also known as: Now you can't roll below a 9 on stealth WOOOO! Also, at this point, if you've done everything right, the stealth bonus should be a PLUS THIRTEEN and now you can never roll below a 9. Meaning you'll ALWAYS GET A 23 TO STEALTH. At 14th level you get Blindsense. Now you have become the ultimate rogue, the master rogue, the invisible night stalker of death. So much to the point that you now see all the little rogues, the rogues in training, just like you back in levels 1 and 2. You catch that shit well and can sense anything trying to hide from you within 10 feet. Even if they're invisible. at fifteenth level you get slippery mind which gives you proficiency in wisdom saving throws yaaaaay It's 18th level, and now you get Elusive. You have become a MASTER of the dodge. You can dodge anything. You can zip-zap-bip-bop-hip-hop all over the battlefield, and no one can ever hit you! And NOW, the chances are even SLIMMER! Now no one can EVER get advantage against you. So now all the little rogues, who ever thought they could beat their masters, now can't even STEALTH near them, NOR land a sneak attack! Well, that's it when it comes to Rogue! Yup, uh, that's about everything that you get. Oh, uh, oh wait, sorry. I forgot the last one. Uh, uh, let's see here, um, "Stroke of Luck", it's at level 20. "You have an uncanny knack for succeeding when you need to." "If your attack misses a target, within range, they can turn that miss into a hit." "Alternatively, if you fail an ability check you can... you... you can..." "Treat the roll as a 20." This... This is why you never see high-level Rogues in D&D! They... they don't even EXIST! They move in between the dimensions of EXISTENCE! THEY SEEMINGLY EXIST BUT ALSO DO NOT EXIST! THEY DEFY THE LAWS OF NATURE, AS IT'S SO, PURELY, PURELY FOR ONE THING ONE SINGLE THING! "Sneak attaaack!" [rolls dice]
