How To Get a Woman’s Attention

how do you acquire the interest of the female species you mean personally sharp suits man [Applause] well you know little hygiene is not such a bad thing as a start decent haircut you know certain amount of cleanliness that's a good thing what's rule one in the first book stand up straight with your shoulders back that's good thing to do you know what do women look for depends on the wisdom of the woman obviously but well it does because you know you can narcissists can fool naive women that's why narcissists propagate by the way and we know this because narcissistic Psychopaths young women are more likely to fall for narcissistic Psychopaths and the reason for that is they can't tell them from competent men because narcissistic Psychopaths imitate competence and that's their Niche and so they have a confidence that isn't justified by their ability but the women check out the confidence as a marker of ability and the falsely confident can fool them especially if they're young and naive and so well so let's say you're not going to be a narcissistic psychopath which is often what those like manosphere dating sites teach you is like you know wear an expensive watch and peacock a bit into peacock is to wear something some item of clothing that's you know a little bit out of the ordinary something a little bit more colorful than might be generally the case so that you look like you're confident enough to pull that off with Panache but mostly it's just it's just training in a kind of deceptive narcissism now you know a Wallflower guy might benefit from some training in in narcissistic psychopathy you know just to sort of balance them out a bit so you can make some progress forward that's why people like Andrew Tate are so popular and and I I'm not saying that in an entirely dismissive manner but there's a huge danger there but generally what women want is something like confident productive generosity fundamentally and so you know if that's allied with physical attractiveness and a sense of humor and you know the the sorts of features that a man would also look for in a woman so much the better but your basic bet and not my suspicions are the guy who answered this question is probably young first of all no one likes young men so if they don't women don't like you it's like well that's par for the course who likes young men no one why well they're basically Troublesome and useless and so that's why [Laughter] foreign so cross-culturally women like men who are about four years older than them and the reason for that is you know women are more vulnerable on the sexual front and they have to make themselves even more vulnerable if they have children especially when the children are infants and so they're looking for guys who are competent enough to be able to take care of themselves at least and then have enough left over for a wife and a dependent child and not because exactly because the wife wants to be taken care of because it isn't exactly like women want to be taken care of it's more reciprocal relationship but if a woman has a dependent child then both of them have to be taken care of especially when the child's an infant and so women tilt the scales toward assessment of men on the grounds of their competent generosity and the reason and you know men might be annoyed about that but I would say well if you were a woman you do the same thing and you know how I know that it's because women are female humans and so if you were a woman you'd be just like a woman so because that's what that's what a woman is right so you can't blame women it's like clue in there buddy if all women don't like you it's you and that's you know that's so annoying it's especially if you're young because most women aren't going to like you and so and it is you so you have to grow up and but then you know you got to understand that if you make yourself competent and productive and generous and a little bit socially skilled and reasonably clean eventually you know you'll fool someone and then foreign and then you know might take a few years but but generally it happens so so that's the thing is don't you know don't don't be a fool turn yourself into someone who's worth being around and and then develop enough social skills so you advertise yourself genuinely because you know it's not also useful if you're a man to be competent productive and generous and then so timid and socially unskilled that no one can tell that's also not helpful Engineers do that all the time so my friend Jim he's my brother-in-law he's a great engineer he said Engineers are the only men who never figured out how to turn social status in demating opportunities that's such a funny line it's also true you know what I'm going to tell you a story about him too I was with him and a friend of mine who's also an engineer in a bar in Palo Alto in California it was so damn funny it was a wine bar a pretty sophisticated place you know and uh I was sitting there talking to them and they're both high-end engineers and like super bright people and but they're engineers and so and there was this quite attractive woman there about our age this was like 15 years ago and she was a teacher I she she tried to get herself integrated into the conversation and um and she was a teacher and and she lived in in Palo Alto and she was clearly there alone and wanted some company and um so funny because this poor girl she's trying to get into the conversation and she she was listening then she'd offer an opinion she was trying to play along and those bloody Engineers they just told her like five ways she was wrong and then kept on talking to each other and it's like it's so funny then she'd look kind of a bashed you know and and and and out of place and then she'd muster up some courage a little farther down the conversation and uh she'd offer an opinion and then they'd tell her just like Engineers no this you're wrong and here's five reasons why and it's like then she could I thought I she eventually you know laughed surprise surprise and I pointed out to them what they had done and like these are pretty sophisticated guys but it was just so goddamn comical to watch I could hardly stand it's like you bloody Engineers you wonder why you know it's hard for you to mate [Laughter] this is really funny so yeah so look if you're young if you're a young guy it's like straighten yourself up you know don't be eating you know Cheetos in the basement covering yourself with orange dust and being bitter about women it's like go out there and make yourself useful in some Dimension or rather and you know fortify yourself a bit and have some confidence and then figure out how to present yourself in a manner commensurate with that and you know get out there in the world so people can see you now and then and you know some poor woman will be desperate enough to give you a shot at some point [Applause] hmm all right that's how I caught her you know actually that's a lie too because she actually caught me so all right yeah I chased her for a long time and then she caught me yeah okay before I say something else

Channel: Jordan B Peterson Clips

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Keywords: psychology, philosophy, Jordan B. Peterson, Jordan Peterson, JB Peterson, jordanbpeterson, jordanpeterson, personality, understandmyself, selfauthoring, neuropsychology, jordan peterson clips, jp peterson clips, jp clips, jordan peterson podcast clips, jordan peterson live, jordan peterson livestream, jordan peterson shorts, jordan peterson tiktoks, jordan peterson motivational clips

Id: FEH0XCW81GI

Length: 8min 9sec (489 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 11 2023