How To Avoid An Emotional Train Wreck

[Music] we're tuning on the broadcast livestream Facebook roku youtube buy everything tens television stations across the United States we've got an opportunity a firm is calling us from Florida they're wanting to put us on there broadcasting system which will help us reach another 300 million people so you pray much about that that God would give us liberty and supply that need but right now as we're broadcasting around the world people in mud huts people in the Philippines I got a letter people in New Zealand all around the world are watching this broadcast live and some of them it's in the middle of the night in their country we do want to take a moment to say thank you let's put our hands together welcome to our broadcast today may god enrich you as a result of listening to today's broadcast I'm in Ecclesiastes chapter number three and verse number one to everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under the heaven a time to be born and a time to die a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted a time to kill and a time to heal a time to break down and a time to build up there's a time to weep in a time to laugh a time to mourn and a time to dance a time to cast away stones a time to gather stones together a time to embrace a time to refrain from embracing a time to get a time to lose a time to keep and a time to cast away a time to Rend and a time to sow and please underline this a time to keep silence and a time to speak time to love a time to hate a time of war and thank God there are times when there's peace that'll be all the scripture I read because I've got to get into our message but these eight short verses of our tax reveals the reality of experiences that we all are going to face at one time or another in our lifetime the consolation of these verses is verse number one declares that life has both seasons and purposes in everything that happens to us so no matter what comes your way it will only be for a season and no matter what comes your way God has a purpose and a plan for it so in not knowing that the rider warned us of the danger of losing purpose in life when changes occur that are unexpected and yes some even unwanted changes like this in verse number two yes there's a time to live but just as much as there's a time to live there's a season to die he said in verse number three there's there's a time when you can build things but there's also a time when things will fall apart quicker than you could imagine to put them back together but I want to focus in on verse number four because he donated a whole verse to this there's a time in a season and a change in verse four for intense experience that brings opposing emotions in our life isn't it amazing that the rider Solomon donated verse number four the whole verse in its entirety to one problem that is going to be a season is going to be a reality and it's going to have a purpose in our life and that is emotional conflicts notice he talked about from going from weeping to laughing from going to mourning or being sorrowful to dancing when you read this verse it's like the pendulum on a grandfather clock it's like the emotions of the individual is swinging from one extreme to the other and what the writer is telling us is above all the other things we're gonna face in life many of them are physical many of them are spiritual but there are some that's emotional there's gonna be good times he mostly and there's gonna be bad times there's gonna be times when you feel like crying there's gonna be times when you feel like dancing there's gonna be times when you feel depressed and there's gonna be times when you have expedient joy and if we don't understand that that our emotions can change just as fast as situations in life can change then when we when these dramas hit us we don't know how to respond and we find ourselves shipwrecked somewhere down the road of life so I'm preaching this morning on the subject how to avoid an emotional train wreck I'd like to borrow your imagination and imagine us being inside an old-time coal driven drain it's headed for a dead end run into an avalanche of this use that's about to send our lives and our emotions over the edge the train behind the locomotive has three box cars full of coal and all of those boxcars full of cold feed the locomotive to continue down the track to our soon destruction the only way to stop this disaster is by discontinuing to feed what we call the stoker if you feed if you starve the stoker which is the man that takes the coal and puts it in the fire if you starve him out and cut the coal off he no longer has the ability for this train wreck to make progress and become a reality so I want to talk about those three boxcars it's right behind the locomotive of your life what direction are you going in how much power have you got in your life are you happy with the direction your life is going in if you're headed over the edge and you're about to be an emotional train wreck it's only because you are continuing to feed your life to go in that direction so I want to talk about the three boxcars that faces all of us that fuels our life to eventually become a disaster basically it's in three simple points and I talk about often number one the first thing that feeds us to go into a disaster emotionally and become a train wreck is we get hurt have you ever been hurt in life has anybody ever hurts you has anybody ever said something about you that wasn't right has anybody abused you has somebody taken advantage of you did somebody say something to you that hurts you every family has a drama queen in it everybody's got a drama queen and the only woman it's not laughing right now is because you're the drama queen of your family because everybody's got one and you can't even get together at a funeral until somebody's got to say something stupid to hurt somebody or make somebody mad and get everything bent out of shape and ruin it for everybody they're called drama queens and they're easily to hurt you I know we shouldn't wear our feelings on our shoulder so to speak but you must understand words has content in words as has weight and you could damage somebody the Bible said it's harder to win a Finch City than it is a brother that's been offended and so we have this repercussion that hurt produces hurt we don't understand it but it seems like when we get hurt the automatic reflex for that hurt is to hurt somebody else especially the person that intentionally hurt hurt us in the first place it may be somebody you really love but because you have been hurt in some issue or some avenue of life you even have an inward desire to see them hurt even though basically you love them are you feeding this train wreck that will eventually take you under and out because somebody hurts you can I encourage you a little bit in life we've all been hurt that's part of life and I don't care how guarded and protected and educated you are strong there are going to be times in your life when you get hurt and if you're not careful you'll breed hurt back and hurt other people which just makes the situation more complex sure we've been hurt and every time God wants to do something for you or do something through you the devil will bring up that boxcar and say yeah I know you want to do something for God but what about that person it hurts you what about that person that made you cry and the load-out and the very thing you're letting him feed you is gonna take you over the edge and let you become a spiritual train wreck have you been hurt when you shovel out the coal car of hurt you're 1/3 of the way already to be a total disaster so when you run out of hurt and you don't deal with hurt and you don't reckon and you don't reconcile the fact you've been hurt then you get into car number two and you get hard because you have been hurt you have now come to the conclusion that the way you don't get hurt anymore is you just get so hard you don't allow people to affect you oh I'm preaching this morning whether you pout or clap I know I'm preaching this morning so you got hurt by somebody you've not gotten over it it's taking you down the wrong road of your life so now the conclusion and the way you solve it is you just get hard you get calloused you get beyond feeling you get hard because you feel like you've been used betrayed forsaken abused in some kind of situation of life so you hear people say stuff like this well bless God I've been hurt one time and I'll never live long enough to hurt me again and what you think you're doing for recovery is just sending you that much further down the wrong track because when you get hard it's not only people can't touch you but the Holy Ghost can touch you either so you develop a callus you develop a separation between you and everybody you develop a distance because you got hurt now you prejudge everybody because one person hurts you you prejudge the whole world and now you let nobody get close to you you keep everybody at arm's distance and by the way that could include your own husband and wife you keep them at a distance because you trusted this one time and got heart did you know divorce is 50% in America but did you know divorce the second time is 69 percent in America it goes up 19 more percent on your second marriage how could that be you think they would have learned their mistakes from their first one not so brother Danny they got hurt there in their first one and even though they get married again they still thinking to their second mate you are not going to do to me what my first one did to me and I'll prove it to you because I'm gonna keep you at a certain distance and it affects the relationship of that husband and wife over something that they're not even guilty of so now you're going to get hard right you're going to keep everybody at a distance and you're just going to go your merry way no you're not you're not only going to drift from people you're gonna drift from God because the hardness of your heart dislocates your ability to communicate with God oh I got ditches bless God I tell you what I ain't letting that crowd hurt me I'll be strong I'll just live by myself that sounds good out in public but you know as well as I do that's not right and the reason why you can't pray and the Bible looks like nothing more than a magazine and the reason why you can't come to church and worship and witness the Holy Ghost and enjoy services like you're used to is because you have put a shield all the way around you and nobody including God can get close to you now right right so you get hard so now you're two thirds of the way down the track to be in a disaster and you think you're doing right you think you're doing all right and you don't even know it but you're running out of time and space because the third one once you get hurt and you allow it to become hard then you get hateful you get mean you get vindictive you get bitter you get judgmental you get resentful you get to where you longed to hear something negative about somebody we have young people here 30-something of them stood up last week I think three of them live with her biological parents out of all of our kids I think we have three now and what happens to these children is when they see mom and dad don't make it and though they're not involved and it's not a decision they made the parents have to understand the kids didn't make a decision on what family to be born into they didn't vote on being your kid it's just something God allowed to happen and sometimes the parents get to fighting among each other and they forget the kids or being in a world win and they're being tossed to and fro and don't know which direction and what's going on so all of a sudden they hear the dad arguing with the mom and the mom arguing with the dad and they're split up and mom's got him this weekend and dad's got a dentist weekend and all of a sudden all these kids that you see sitting here in church smiling they come to my office with tears running down their face and say I hate my daddy there are kids sitting in this building right now that have told me to my face they hate their daddy what would make a teenager hate their daddy because he hurt him and when he hurt on they said I'm not gonna get hurt like that again so they've isolated themselves from people family Christians and God and now because they're isolated in the Holy Spirit can't deal with them and talk to them and convict them and woo them back because they've cut the Holy Spirit off too now you get mean now you get hateful and you start saying things like I don't care if I ever see him again I don't care my mother ever has anything to do with my life got kids sitting here in this building that cannot stand the presence of their mother and the reason why they're that way is not even meaning to she hurt them and through that herd they become distant and cold and now it becomes hate anybody that hurts you is a potential person in your life for you to hate it's easy to hate people that hurt you but the Bible said we know we passed from death unto life because we love the Brethren that's not the characteristic of a Christian that's not what a godly person does you may get hurt you may get hard but it's never right to hate a body you may hate what they are you may hate what they have done if I heard your story I may even say you got a right to feel that way but if it affects your relationship with God they win Hey so let's take these three boxcars again because some of you are tedium between two and three and if you don't listen to me very quickly you're in trouble you're in trouble you know you're in trouble if you don't listen to me so how do i how do I like correct being hurt you correct it by forgiving the people that hurt you and this is not an easy thing for me because I'm a you smacked me I almost make you back type of person and eye for an eye tooth for a tooth my favorite bible verse but you got to forgive the people that hurt you and every time i say that some Pharisee ago christian o come and say they not asked me to forgive them when Jesus was on the cross that crowd never asked Jesus to forgive them one time but he said Father forgive them for they know not what they do real Christians don't forgive people that hurt them because they deserve it you forgive them because it's the right thing to do and it'll get your life back on the right track that's why you forgive people okay so we got we got the hurt done with forgiveness what are you doing getting hard with getting hard you face the fact that you are hard see some of you been hard so long you think it's okay now you've adjusted your life to being cold and hard and solid and distant you've got to face the fact that this is not what you are this is not what you want to be is this really the way you want to live the rest of your life in an atmosphere of isolation and silence and so you've got to face the fact you know what I got hurt and I've let this hurt drive me to the point where I've got a little cold and when you face the fact that you've gotten cold that's what the word revival means vile means fire Rhee means to do over again you want to have revival you want to have the fire built up in you again you want to get back where you were and even potentially above that then you've ever been been with God then you got to forgive the people that hurt you look in the mirror and say it's not my sister or my brother but it's me Oh Lord standing in the need of prayer I'm facing the fact that I've got cold and I need help and I want forgiveness and I want set on fire again because if you would you deal with the hurt and you deal with a heart now you get into being hateful mean vindictive and bitter how do you get over being hateful you have to focus on Jesus doesn't that sound simple but it's not an easy thing to do brother Peyton and I'll tell you why I can't see Jesus how can I focus on somebody I can't see I'm looking unto Jesus the author and the finisher of our faith how you're going to look under Jesus you can't see so it's a little more complex than we allow it to settle in our heart for instance it's easy for me to be hateful and to focus on you because I can see you I can see your faults I can see your failures I can see your shortcomings I can see everything about you that's not right trust me and you can do the same toward me or anybody else in this building but when you look to Jesus think about this he is in the third heaven seated at the right hand of the Father that correct now watch this so I've got a choice to make I can either look at you and stay hateful or I can look at him now watch this while I'm looking at him guess what I can't see you anymore [Applause] so when somebody comes to me and says I've been hurt I've been hard I've even got hateful I just don't know what I'm gonna do it's just gotten too complex I just let it get out of hand it's everything I think about I can't do anything without it it's always on my mind all you're telling me is this all you're telling me is you have got your eyes off him and you have got your eyes on them and as long as your eyes are on them you're gonna stay hurt you're gonna stay hard and you're gonna stay hateful but when you look at him that loves everybody in spite of all their shortcomings see we formulate a constitution of people because when we look at them we see their mistakes and their mistakes dictate the live of the level of love and forgiveness and affection we give them because we know they're not perfect and when we start seeing imperfections in them it governers the level of appreciation and love we have for them that's because we're looking at each other but when you look at Jesus you know what's wonderful he knows everything about you this stinks he knows every fault every failure every shortcoming every mistake every attitude everything about you that's negative God knows it personally but he loves you anyhow so I get over hurt being hard and being hateful because I'm looking at him somebody asked me some time ago all four of my children are in church raised got their own family serving God and I'm proud of them they're living for God in spite of me because I made a lot of mistakes both of my sons are preaching while I'm standing in this pulpit right now and I love them but somebody asked me how did you get your kids to stay in church with all they seen growing up here was my answer brother does I taught my kids do what you do because you love Jesus if you do what you do because you love the church or you love people you're going to get hurt and when you get hurt you're going to get hard and when you get hard you're going to be hateful and you're gonna grow up bitter and you're gonna get out of church and use the church and the people as an excuse to get out but if you're doing what you're doing for Jesus but it doesn't matter if they like you it doesn't matter if they leave the church it doesn't matter if they never come back you're not doing it for them anyhow you're doing it for Jesus there are simple things that we can do that can help us get through these train wrecks in our life some of them I don't like but it's just the reality of life the first one's eating healthy did you know it's a proven fact when people are under stress the more they desired junk did you know that I've taught and practiced psychology for 25 years then I got depressed and resigned but when I went to the university they taught me I can tell you everything about you just by the way you put your food on your plate if I have never met you if you've never said a word to me if I know nothing about your genealogy just the way you put your food on your plate I can tell you everything about you by the way you eat because it is proven that psychologically the way a man thinketh in his heart so easy the Bible said so if you're thinking junk you desire junk if you're thinking filth you desire filth if you're thinking a cheap high you desire to eat a cheap high so when somebody goes through a food line and they come back and they got 18 doughnuts and brother Tyler three things of ice cream and an 85 cookies I can tell you one thing he's a man it depressing I'm tell you that right now and I could tell everything about you just by the way you eat and so we have a tendency that when pressure gets on us we call it nervous eating and you can laugh but it's a reality we feel like we get relief as long as we're putting something in our mouth and it can be chips and it can be pop and it can be all kinds of junk food and quick food and fast foods and and while you're eating it you seem to get relief but the problem is when you quit eating it comes back again so you eat again and then you start eating when you're not even hungry then you start eating stuff your body doesn't even want crave or desire next thing you know you're overweight now you're depressed because you don't look like you used to you can't eat Krispy Kreme Doughnuts every day and look like your high school picture that is a dream world are you out of your ever-loving mind so now adding to your depression is the fact that you're overweight why don't you restructure your eating habits and decide I'm going to eat healthy another thing you can do is exercise the worst thing you can do when you feel depressed or you've been hurt is lock yourself in a room turn the lights off and jump in the bed that is the worst thing you can do you need to get out enjoy the sunshine or the new lakes that we have here in Kingsport Tennessee but there's something about exercising that increases your relationship with God the Bible said that Adam walked with God this ain't talked with him said he walked with him in the cool of the day is it amazing that Enoch walked with God for 300 years there's something about just getting out of the house getting away from your cell phone getting away from Facebook turn Twitter off just get outside put something comfortable on walk down the road smell the air listen to the birds look at the sunshine and say you know what above everything I'm going through God is still God he's good in my life and just exercise learn to eat right learn to rest when you go to sleep this is one of my many failures I can lay down and sleep and feel worse when I get up than I did when I laid down how can you do that it's because I may be asleep in my body but I'm not resting my mind brother McCarty when I lay down my body may be at rest in the bed but my mind's running 450 miles an hour and I wake up no matter what time I'm already two hours behind what I had scheduled for that day even if it is four o'clock in the morning when I wake up and so I have got the train and I want you to learn to relax and when you lay down and go to sleep allow your brain to rest am I making sense another thing you need to do is slow down every once in a while me when I get stuff on me I feel like I need to get busier I gotta do more I can't sit out brother guy you know what I'm about just gotta be bouncing all over the place all the time I'm going through something somebody's hurt me I feel like I'm getting a little hard and man I hate these people and I just wish they gotta kill them all and not go to their funeral and send black roses and so you think you just got to do something all the time because you can't you can't let your mind rest because when you do you get hurt again learn when you lay down to go to sleep relax slow down a little bit talk to somebody that's dear to you that you can trust even if it's Jesus did you know emotional pains only last 10 to 20 minutes I'll think about this I got a hurry emotional pain only last into 20 minutes at a time so why are you been living in it for months the only way that emotion can keep living after 10 or 20 minutes is because you're feeding it that depression that hurt that hate would pass in 20 minutes if you didn't keep stoking the fire you are stoking the fire think about it in 10 minutes you could have victory over what's driving you crazy right now but as long as you got those three box cars full of coal following that locomotive you are going to end up a train rat at the end of your life it is proven data that crying does not help forget trying to tell your wife that brother you're wasting your ever-loving time but it's proven data that crime doesn't help but millions have testified harder hearted relief through a period of weeping so now you're hurting and now you feel like you have pain because of failure overthinking loneliness grief guilt and rejection so I need you to replace these three boxcars with something new that will turn your life around I mentioned them in closing understand right now what you are allowing yourself to become quit blaming everybody else because you're not what you're supposed to be take responsibility for your actions look at what you've allowed yourself to become you are something now that five years ago you never dreamed you would be and the reason why you're that far down the road in the wrong direction is you have kept feeding it you have kept feeding it understand that you are in the mess you're in because you've allowed it to happen number two promote healing and yourself by letting it go there God sir you've worried and fretted and told this story a thousand times it's kept you up a hundred nights you don't eat right you've isolated yourself you have no joy in your life and the problems still there so why don't you just let it go understand if there's a God in heaven there's a Judgment Day for everybody and the truth is going to come out and just let it go and go on with your life and number three restore your life to what you knew it will it was before the drama and the pain came into your life your future could be brighter than all your past and your former situations don't allow people and problems to define who and what you are now listen I gotta close something you don't listen to me you're gonna drop off in the depression despair anxiety and doom people are illustrating this by isolating themselves personality changes inflicting body pain more cases of body mutilation are being reported in America now than in all of history put together because kids are in so much pain they feel like if they hurt themselves it lets the pain from the inside be manifested on the outside so now we got people that slice themselves and cut themselves and bite themselves and burn themselves because they feel like that outer pain releases the inward pain not knowing that Jesus is the answer to their problems in 1918 there was a circus that traveled by train it was called the Hagin back wallis circus they were traveling in the middle of the night one night in 1918 to Hammond Indiana to put up for a show there at that time they were one of the biggest circuses in America they had to pull over in the site of one of the rails and stop because one of the fire boxes had got so hard it was hot that it was melting the bearing on the wheels so they stopped the train in the middle of the night to fix the box before the train the locomotive broke down while doing so men of warning were standing on both sides of the tracks with kerosene lanterns in hand that were signals for other trains that are coming to stop one young conductor that had just been license ignored the kerosene lanterns and went on his way at 60 miles an hour he plunged into the back of the wooden carts of the circus train in the middle of the night the crash were so loud and devastating people from 15 minutes away heard the noise when the trains collided it erupted in flames in the wooden box cars containing hundreds of workers and animals went up in flames and hundreds were killed and burned and nothing but ashes at night many more were injured it was there that the circus only missed two nights of performing they got a skeleton crew together and put up what they had left and started the circus only two days later it was there we get that famous saying the show must go on but when I read that story yesterday I felt a tear run out of my eye because it was needless hurt and pain that could have been avoided if somebody would have just taken the warning and I thought about my people I love you people you're my life and I'm watching you go down the wrong track wide open I'll be honest I'm doing all I can I really am I'm doing everything I can to stand on the side of the rail with the light of the word of God saying stop it stop it stop it and if you don't listen to me and get your life on the right track there's gonna be a lot of pain and harm needlessly done in your life and your family simply because you won't heed the warning is there something you need to let go of today is there somebody you need to forgive today is there a situation you need to put in the past and bury that thing once and for all I know I had to hey everybody this is doctor kid and I'm the pastor of a massive Kingsport we're located at 58 42 West Carter's Valley Road right here in beautiful Kingsport Tennessee every Sunday is Resurrection Sunday here at Emmaus but during this specific time of year we want to wish you and yours a Happy Easter season and especially Resurrection Sunday you cannot explain the services at Emmaus you have to experience them come and visit us we're looking forward to meeting you hope to see you soon [Music] Sinclair [Music] and great [Music] [Music]

Channel: drphilkidd

Views: 7,776

Rating: 4.8895025 out of 5

Keywords: Rec. 2--24-19

Id: 98v1bVAtaG8

Length: 34min 10sec (2050 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 23 2019