*WAPOOSH* TOP O' THE MORNIN' TO YA LADDIES! My name is Jacksepticeye, and welcome to a game called Kindergarten. Which I know nothin' about. I just know that Ken and some other YouTubers have been playing it. Ken is the one that I saw, um, in my subscription feed that was playing it, and then I had some people in my comments tell me to play it. So, I have no idea what it is. But what I can gather, is that you play as a kid in kindergarten. And school may be a bit rougher than it seems? It looks super kiddy right here, but from what I've seen, there's talk about murder, and "the school not being all it's cracked up to be" kind of thing. So, maybe kindergarten is wayyy fucking harder than I thought it was. Well, we don't have kindergarten here, We have an equivalent (in Ireland), but we don't call it kindergarten. Ummm. Right, okay. Aww, I'm so freaking adorable and cute. Look at me go! Look at my little swagger! I didn't have a swagger like that. Actually, I still don't have a swagger like that, So. You're doing well for yourself, kid. Um, piggy bank. Five dollars. Press down to take money. Press up to put money back. Press interact to withdraw, and planner to cancel. *Soft tap/click* Okay... I. Don't. Know. How much. That is. I-I have a dollar. Um, Am I going to have to buy some smokes or cigarettes? Errr...or something like that? They're - those are the same thing. What do I know? I'm a freaking kid. Okay, let's head on out. *Youthful Jack voice* : "Am I ready to start another day of kindergarten?" Hell to the yes you are! Good lord! Look at Miss Bouncing' Boobs over here! Miss No-Chin. Miss Minion Face Uh, where am I? Okay. Hi, friends? Potential friends. I like the music. *Rude six year old child called Buggs* : "Screw off, kid. I'm busy," Okay, I will just click to screw off. Some of the sound effects remind me of "The Escapists". *Nugget with a lisp* Hi. My friends call me Nugget. Or they would if I had any. Nugget knows no love or friendship since Billy went missing." Oh, God. (laughing kinda sadly) (Jack reading out options) 'What happened to Billy?' 'I'll be your friend'. So I have actions that I can do in a day. This is an early access game, by the way, on Steam. So, anything that you're seeing here, is not the finished product. I should say that right off the bat, or some people will get, (a bit of a laugh) will get bad vibes off it; for stuff going wrong. (Jack reads out options again) 'What happened to Billy' 'I'll be your friend'. So I have five moves; that I can do per day, and some actions costs an apple. Uh, (Jack chooses an option) 'I'll be your friend' *Nugget*: "What is your offering?" (Jack reads) 'I only have friendship'. *giggle laugh* Jesus! Kinderga- this is like the "South Park" kindergarten. . *Nugget*: "Heh, perhaps that is all Nugget needs. You may have Nugget's nugget. It signifies our friendship." Uhh, thanks? *Nugget*: "Do not consume the nugget of friendship, for with its digestion, so too is our friendship digested." *laugh* I won't. Is it like an actual chicken nugget? *Nugget*: "Good. Nugget will see you later friend. No more talking now. Shoo." Okay, okay, geez. *little laugh* These kids have more personality than I do. *Perky, preppy child*: "Hey there, cutie. I'm Cindy. Wanna be my boyfriend?" Ahhh, I don't know, Cindy. I can't really see if you got the crazy eyes or not, and I don't know if you have any baggage with you. Do you have a baggage? Do you have like, a-a bad relationship with your dad or your mom? Long-lost brother? Alcohol addiction? 'Sure' why not? *Cindy*: "That's what I like to hear we'll totally be the cutest couple in school, but first you have to do something for me." Always the case you know you tell a girl you'll be your boyfriend and immediately she wants you to do something for her. Come on Cindy! What what if I want you to do something for me? This relationship has to be a two-way thing. "Like what?", "Isn't our love enough?" "Hahaha that's precious ("that's cute" but Jack read it wrong), but no... it isn't. You're gonna have to prove it to me." "How do I do that?" "You see that girl over there? That's Lily. She is by far the ugliest, naastiest girl you will ever meet. I want you to take this gum and stick it -er in her hair during morning time." NO! Fuck you Cindy, no way. *Cindy* "Fine, but don't come crying to me when you die old and alone." I'm like, I'm like 3-4 years old in this game. Jesus Christ. Oh there's more of you Woah hey yeah he's got a fuckin he's got a he's got that neck move going on look at him go, is that a mop or like a prehistoric spear and you're dressed like Moses. I don't know what up. "I'm Monty if you need something come talk to me either i can get it for you for the right price. what I need and what I sell changes throughout the day, so come see me often." Ok what can i buy in kindergarten? Yo-yo, I fucking knew cigarettes would be for sale. a screwdriver, voice recorder, I don't know what I need yet "nevermind." uh not right now. "Hi, oh um hey I'm Lily. You probably heard about what happened to my brother Billy." "I haven't" and "I don't really care." good both great options uh I haven't uh douche-a-tron on over here didn't tell me. "You haven't! It's been all over the news. He went missing a few days ago." I'm sorry to hear that Lily. Times are tough for all. "Thanks, uh, that makes you one of the few people that even seems to care. Ever since he went missing people either ignore me or insult me." Cindy has been trying to put gum in my hair THAT BITCH! Sorry uh I don't know but if I were you I'd say away from her she's really mean." Thanks for the tip Lily, little lillers My little lily pad, speaking of lily pads there's some down here. I like Lilly, Lilly is my favorite one so far. What's up Jeffrey. Jerome! Damn it! Almost got his name right on accident. "I'm Jerome I don't think you're cool enough to talk to me." Whatever jerk. Jeez you come out and you're just a little boy with a little swagger going on no worries in your life. When you're that age you're supposed have no worries The biggest thing you have to worry about is, Jesus how much time do I have to play today tha-that's your biggest concern at that age, not trying to buy cigarettes and putting gum in people's hair, God. "How are you doing there sunny?" Don't mind the old janitor here just sweeping up after you silly cretins sweepy sweepy sweepy." "Uh, That's a mop." "Ah ... so it is." "You're also mopping the sidewalk." "I'll be mopping your blood off it if you don't skedaddle." ok "I don't want to skedaddle." I'm a man of my word *Deep (Batman) voice* You gonna kill me?" Look me in the eyes and tell me you're gonna kill me, come on do it. Jesus fucking christ! Oh mother'of' god! Ok! I may have underestimated this game I may, I know I said that there might be murder in it But Fuckin'ell! Right. Umm... Don't talk to the janitor. He killed me with a mop. He killed a child, with a mop! Mother'o God, he must've been watching fucking daddy 05 or something. "I'm miss Applegate. I have been well endowed *Ahem* with excellent teaching qualities." Yeah that's a great big pair of teaching qualities, she got here. you sure have I'm not sure I'm comfortable with this game what the hell is this. Is this all I do? I really like the music. Right, So There wasn't a whole lot going on then. Wait do I have to do the gum thing? Suure.. Uuhhh... "Like what?" Okay "Yeah." I'll do the gum thing "Okay this is gonna be so grate Finally getting what she deserves just like her brother did for dumping me." Oh Nooo... Aww I don't want to do that. "Nothing," Can I sell the gum? Lily, probabbly heard me, I don't really care. Okay I need to get the nugget get back off Nugget as well. "I'll be your friend" "I only have friendship" That's what needs. Thanks. Okay, cool. Oh god. This game got fucking REAL. Right let's see if we can actually put the gum in her hair. C-can I can I not. What am i doing? Oh I'm withdrawing money. How how do i how do i how do i do things. I don't know how I do. Uh options, controls, interact space, open planner, use action return. Yeah I was pressing return but that took money out. Uh this. I don't know how I do it "Okay children it's time to start the day. Everyone head inside for morning time!" oh oh there's more so maybe you have to do it in here "Good morning children it's time for you to pick your buddies for morning time, or you can be sad, pathetic and alone. As long you're the best you can be this is really the education system that's going on. Is that a fucking sword? Go find a partner.. Okay what if I want the sword to be my partner lugar snooping around in other people's cubbies mmm that's their cubbies what's in my cubby? There is fucking nothing in my cubby okay let's see if I can actually do this gum hair thing through the whole morning buddy thing anymore my brother Billy was normally my buddy put gum in Lily's hair ah no That's so mean Cindy put you up to this didn't she I don't even care leave me alone Oh I feel horrible now I did what you asked you fucking heartless monster oh my gosh she totally did wow what happened what did she say did she cry I bet she cried she cried yes I'm so happy Now you can be my morning buddy which also makes you my boyfriend as my boyfriend you get the honor of playing house with me I meet you over by the dollhouse do I really want to Lily had it all Lily had a little flower in her hair and everything she could cute little bangs she lost her brother you turned me into a monster Cindy all I wanna do is be fucking happy okay welcome home husbands I hope work wasn't too hard because you're going to be making dinner tonight me starts to think that Cindy is a bit high-maintenance also possibly slight hint of bitch but she's a child so I can't really say that why do I have to make dinner because I've been so busy maintaining the house and I have you been drinking again what is this game wait what no honey I'm just tired that's the smell of tired on me oh sure you are you're always so tired I'm sure you won't mind blowing into this then it's not a breathalyzer you bet it is and if you go so much as 0.01 I'm calling your sponsor hey I'm Irish there's always a slight trace of alcohol in my blood system I'll take the test good bloke zero point 32 you're trashed right now how can she do this to me he says you against over who could you be a father when you can't even take care of yourself now I have kids what is this I well well you were in prison it it's probably not yours i'm sorry i guess i have my own side a problem to deal with i woke up today a bouncing baby boy ready to start my kindergarten day started talking to people met a friend he gave me a nugget then i met this girl and my life was spiral downward since then let such a good analogy for life it's a good lesson for life meet the wrong people and your life will go into a spiral that you can't get out of well if I we could but it's kind of funny to see how these kids have adults problems all of sudden have a wife I have a house I have a kid that's not mine I've been to prison you cheated on me it was only one time I was alone he was there for me when you weren't I didn't know how to get by people get mad we can get through this though I I still love you I want a divorce but I sign off this game I didn't think that all of a sudden I would be killed by a janitor with a fucking mop and then all of a sudden I'd be have a kid I was in prison and I want a divorce I you're right this isn't working out what do we do now go spend the night with your mother I guess that's fair I call you tomorrow i hope you can sort this out amicably well then wow that was the most fun I've had playing house in a boil they're gonna make a splendid boyfriend I want you to have lunch with me haha oh yeah we were only playing house okay great i see you then sure christ almighty I want no get to be my friend nugget does not wish to spend morning time with you know that is very busy are you busy with you are curious about the ways of nugget interesting perhaps you could be of some use to nugget mayhaps look it is in need of a magnifying glass give it is full of it before the next bell rings and you will be rewarded okay I'm gonna sleeping around other people's copies right how do I get that out of it go find the morning money all right your be an outcast loser like noget I'll say that about my friend no it's my body my bro my home ski right who can be my buddy why the hell do you think I want to be your morning buddy good point oh come on man have some self-esteem what you're gonna be my more anybody you got no time for that nonsense unless you're buying or selling something wanna buy something none of these things are for sale right fucking nothing right now the Jerome is the only one left it wants to be my morning buddy you know you're not cool enough to talk to me let alone be my morning but he'd be fight Monty's gonna hook up me with a sweet yo yo okay get the yo-yo I got it I see how this works get the yo-yo don't know what it is about these things but your own dozen you can have it for one dollar deal as you're doing business which it you to home just home there we go tell me he was going to save it from me you can have it if you'd be my morning buddy I'm running out of things heck Thanks chomping I guess you haven't learned how to tell time yet morning time is pretty much over text shit I do now uh-oh where's Willy where's my time where's my clock get a no get a magnifying glass have lunch with Cindy back oh you found it i just want out to get it no then it Lily shit fuck I didn't do it in time that's how much pellet cafeteria fuck ok cool Lord look at this saw these guys got some biscuits yeah I love me some biscuits and cornbread biscuits this lady is beating the shit out of that food ok you still want to make the plain glass no one ever sits at poor nugget nugget does not have any friends I can't even get the option to sit with them all biscuit balls get the biscuit balls here get them where the hot house a biscuit bulk my own recipe came up with it after a little incident that happened recently what's in them whatever is in a biscuit and a little soap mixer you gross is a little DNA in them it's the extra part that worries me I I'm smart for a kid I ain't going to take that shit I want to know what's in them biscuit balls oh come on try it it won't kill you how much are they they're a buck apiece quite a deal if you say so myself when I'm sure your little friend Cindy would have loved the time would I get very sexually innuendos life from you dude and that's gross just a hair just a hunch I have one thing everyone I'm sure she loved it okay oh it looks like a testicle I'm not sure here's the whole like haha yeah yeah oh yeah this is fucking gross this is weird oh hey boyfriend I say to a spot go get something to eat and come sit with me I'm not even the no go cuz I said a bastion of friendship for me and nugget oh good I was just thinking about oh darn it my stupid mother packed me something that's not vegan she knows I'm all vegan right now God that woman is insufferable okay sweetie would you be a darling and go get me something vegan uh you know like uh know exactly what it means but I know it's good so just ask around and see if you can find something vegan oh and that slop isnt
vegan but I just gave you the ball oh that I mess it up please don't sit with me I don't wanna talk to you talk to anyone till they find my brother okay she's not mad anymore we should go in there I figured you'd be seeing you around slap it's all good and the only thing anyone is brave enough to try a biscuit from the general don't world man can't even spell right okay i want to buy something mclubbe silly meal or a salad right I'll buy a salad wait after quite know how much it is 75 cents okay let's get out 75 cents I think you want to take out a dollar the day's end because every time I've taken out a dollar so far the next room starts gonna buy something a salad Oh weeds are so much money away to 275 already and the stupid fucking come on ooh there's hits bugs Monty and Lily should all be eliminated during lunch some of the teacher saying you don't need any special items to complete your own Cindy or the teachers missions this is the hints page it will find you to play a game you need a special item from Cindy before he can certain of its mission you need special item from Jerome and as much money as you can carry to complete Monteith mission you need to have special items from Monty nuggets and bugs in order to complete Lily's mission cool Lord right this is hard right ok I'm going to leave this episode here for now to see what's going on that game is weird I like it though it's really straight I didn't think it would be as good as it is I like that it's just all over the place that kindergarten you're dealing with stuff that's like prison basically you're trading stuff your meeting friends you can get shivved if you're not careful enough and people will just stab you with a mop she got real very fast anyway thank you guys so much watch this video if you liked it punch that I could never face like apart and they face a row thanks guys I was a news it is hotter than the inside of a tauntaun in here I talked to smell bad in the outside
