Hardin is the worst character ever created *AFTER 2 COMMENTARY*

all right i guess we're doing this hello troublemakers and welcome into another movie commentary monday today we're watching after we collided which is the sequel to after a movie that is based on a wattpad story a fanfic in fact about one direction so rest assured that the source material is what at the utmost of quality and i don't know what happened because i roasted the hell out of that movie but for some reason the after fandom really likes me people that unironically like after are like yes we like your video making fun of the thing that we love i can't explain it they're just like we love you for it and i'm like what did i do i just made fun of your thing all right why am i getting credit don't love me hate me but what i will say is that i enjoy doing movies like these right they're just easily roastable it's like an after kissing booth like the the christmas switch the princess switch whatever that was last year the sequel is coming out this year it's the vanessa hutchins movie where there's two of her and then the sequel there's gonna be three of her i'm excited i'm so excited but watching after with you guys is gonna be the most fun experience ever so i hope you just sit back grab some snacks and let's watch after two together it's only fifteen dollars to buy this that scares me most movies charge like mulan that was like thirty dollars are they charging less so that you can't really complain at the end of it you're finishing your piss and they're just like nah hey we could have charged you way more you knew what you were signing up for fanfic movie half off you get what you pay for listen there's a reason for this it's not because i want to own it forever but just like it's done it's not all right we're past it okay i bought the movie let's just have some fun man that's what movie commentary monday's all about whatever our souls are made of hers and mine are the same a rather pretentious way to open our story a pretentious way to open your story what are you talking about the whole thing is pretentious it's about a band that's not even together anymore rip it's a story you've heard before passed down from the greeks don't start talking about pretentiousness and then comparing your story to like ancient poetry passed down from the greeks no through shakespeare the bronte is jane austen bronte no i don't think bronte ever wrote about some tattooed british guy convincing his friends that he could bang a chick like i'm pretty sure that story doesn't exist even though he represents everything she detests she falls for him and is ultimately betrayed by him don't fall for the detestable guys when it feels as though all is lost the two reunite and live happily ever after a story you've heard before only difference is this isn't that story let me put together this narration here he's like it's a story you've heard countless times before there's conflict drama and then they live happily ever after and it is identical to those stories except it's not mine blown yet ah the train represents his life going off the tracks because we're deep i'm glad you're sad you punk [ __ ] that's a good question pissed off i'm looking for something piss off but that guy comes in later he's looking for someone he's looking for tessa just doesn't have a dad she didn't have a dad in the first one that's probably her dad hey sprossy which one is that is that dylan you just called me an ass wife look i'm sorry it's my first date it's your first day and you're cussing people out that you don't know oh my goodness girl i know she's not gonna get fired because he's gonna be some like [ __ ] millionaire ceo some fanfic drama [ __ ] but you don't come in cussing people out on your first day of work acting like a crazy person banging on elevators shut the [ __ ] up and listen to me i'm gonna like this guy he's got the intensity that i like i apologize for the mess why is her office so dirty on the first day is this supposed to symbolize like someone's business is out of order and she's gonna come in and organize things if there's a montage not even a montage it's just the next it's just one cut later she's got this whole business organized in a day in a day oh she's a slow typer she's busting out 15 words a minute hon do you mind taking tessa shopping she needs something for tonight what vance and i are more than co-workers especially after his wife died of course she did why wouldn't his wife be dead i'd like to look at the statistics of men whose wives die in their 30s and then also men who killed their wives because i feel like there's a large crossover if we're doing like a venn diagram you know what i mean let's go make sure i know what a venn diagram is yes [ __ ] hell yes oh good job dylan you're so smart no one's gonna laugh at you anymore yes oh what a badass he's got flowers on a barbed wire fence it's like he's sensitive but he's tough but if you can get past the tough exterior he's got the sensitivity on the move why is she here he better be using her to advance his business in like a really sleazy way like find her a better job if going to work at like a publishing company isn't interesting enough to have her like working in the office then don't have it work there have her work as like a a nightclub waitress or something you know what i mean where there's always action going on considering investing in vance's expansion advances expansion the vance expanse of course well look at the cat dragged in [Music] what is these choices so you cut away from harden did you miss him okay and then we're just back to the club and then and then we cut to these two here they're laughing and then sprout says wait i don't get it i don't get it so there's a joke we the audience we don't get it as well so like let's have it explained to us of course you know this is great and she walks away without explaining it why cut back to somebody laughing and then not explain why she's laughing especially if another character's gonna ask about it this is so dumb oh my goodness i i felt brain cells just imploding on themselves in my brain i know i look amazing i've had like no carbs in eight weeks villains don't eat carbs how did i know she was going to see harden i know i've been really bad worse than bad yeah but you like it when i'm mad you know you miss me yeah just get back with her bro leave her to sprouse leave the other girl to espresso now get the [ __ ] off me i was eye rolling so hard that i missed it she just tossed a [ __ ] i know she's a villain but like god damn respect women at least even if they're being a little mean i didn't mind [ __ ] me before though right oh let me wow what was that turn that was a very model turn oh he like swung it's like his body he had like roller blades on or something he just spammed his whole body in one motion i'm obsessed with this watch him spin his whole body just comes around how did he do it how did he do it well first i gotta [ __ ] pop my collar like a badass oh this shirt doesn't have a collar damn it i can't be as badass as hard and i guess so he's shoulders first i guess i'll never be a ladies man like [ __ ] hard in here [Laughter] the [ __ ] you looking at freshmen you want me to steal your boyfriend so turn the [ __ ] around i was starting to think that i was gonna root for her as the villain and i wanted her to just embrace the bad but her threat is like oh i'm gonna steal your boyfriends i can totally do that because i'm so hot and sexy tessa where are you where are you i'm drunk uncomfortable and i saw a tampon on the ground i'm leaving i like him i'm an astute little employee you heathen oh she's touching him he's registering that 100 you can live a hundred lives or even a thousand i don't need to live a thousand lives i hardly want to live one oh he's gonna undress now right give me your pants otherwise it's gonna stink oh i wonder what's gonna happen guys hey i'm begging you just please watch his steps hey there's just no confidence in his strides whatsoever the kick isn't high enough and there's not enough force and he's just he's a little too lean and skinny to like be a door kicking kind of guy you know what i mean you can't tell me who i can and can't have sex with oh no oh no don't seduce him what if i was don't no tessa you're drunk if he doesn't have sex with her i'll be kind of excited i'll be like okay maybe he cares about her not to take advantage of her either you [ __ ] me or you leave this donut it's not too late man you can leave i know the song's playing and everything you still got a choice you can still leave you can still go are you sure you'll hate me tomorrow yeah yeah well i hate you already that made a lot of sense to me like why wouldn't her do it she hates him anyways tell me i'm the only one you're the only one ah he's needy why did tessa come to this event what was her role here she had no purpose whatsoever yeah yeah i've been up for a while see you down in five five minutes oh it's weird how you have work obligations on a work trip that's so strange what he's so needy he's i hate him from kissing that guy what what you said kissing you kissed another guy after i betrayed you how dare you who did you kiss no one yeah well when you were kissing that guy i was [ __ ] molly he's so toxic yeah you're still on a work trip he's so toxic in fact this relationship between them is so toxic that i decided to wear my halloween underwear today black and orange baby because this is a horror movie because there's nothing scarier than being in a toxic relationship truth be told i bought these underwear to do a horror movie and then i i forgot if i showed up to my girlfriend's hotel room and i saw a half-naked incredibly handsome man there i'd react the same way like i thought harden was attractive in the first one but i feel like some of the the attractiveness is gone in this movie just because he's so low and needy and desperate and like i don't know it just tanks his overall appearance a little bit i'm not cheering for him at all anymore it's too toxic and he's no longer attractive enough to overcome all the toxicity i don't know what you two said or did to neil last night but he just wrote a humongous check to finance our expansion good job that's just a huge missed opportunity because sprouse and this girl here they could have bonded as they tried to get the client's business they could have been like in some zany situations where they had to like pretend to be something or do certain things in order to get the client's business but just getting the clients business just through happenstance when we barely even saw the client and they didn't have to do anything for it it feels unearned like this whole trip is completely worthless what were you doing what was this man doing trying to win his clients business we didn't see him at all hanging out with the client trying to pitch him sell them nothing i just got i just got the receipt email that i bought this movie and i'm pissed i should have rented it oh this is skyler uh not skylar ah take off liftoff what was his name it has something to do with advice given his name is givens i'm pretty sure he's given's advice you want advice from me you think i don't know that i know i [ __ ] up i know look at him he's sweaty he's unhinged are females finding him attractive i think that's a huge mistake and maybe just because i'm a guy and i'm looking at it from a different perspective than girls might but i feel like he's no longer attractive as a male lead like they have really brought him low and that's not attractive to look at landon landon is his name givens ah it was it was close g-i-v-e-n-s l-a-n-d-o-n both six letters that's so close focus yeah you go after your career and sprouse i just want to say happy holidays and happy birthday i made you something it is a cost analysis breakdown of your weekly uber expenditure versus owning a used car he's a useful guy i did a little research and i found a 2013 toyota corolla went down to the dealership negotiated terms you only pay 150 bucks a month bance also agreed to put your auto insurance on company policy so that's free wow he went out of his way to not only research the cost analysis of it but to go down to the dealership negotiate with the dealership then negotiate with the company to put the insurance onto the company's expenditure instead of hers so he's trying to save her money oh my god he's so nice thank you bye tessa what was that that you did with your lips on my lips i've never experienced that before what do you call that experience they moved in together no don't smell his trousers what are you doing girl oh it's a picture but it's a picture oh that's way worse than a picture [Music] do not try to pass us off as some intense gift he got an avid reader a kindle first of all we're in 2020. if you don't have a kindle you're never getting a kindle like if you wanted one you got one it just seems like a kindle ad all your books in one place it's a [ __ ] kindle you knew they existed they're not even that expensive they're like 100 bucks let's go to ebay kindle forty dollars you can buy a kindle oh what a great gift shut the [ __ ] up hello handsome she was so excited when i told her first i couldn't ruin it i hate how he speaks even yeah how he speaks every line she was so excited i hate hurting so much [ __ ] happy birthday is it your birthday yeah he forgot her birthday but cost analysis sprouse never forgot she never even told him he went through the logs of their applications and he was like it's our birthday tomorrow wow what a guy isn't that just the cutest little bum you've ever seen oh don't show me a baby butt the whole point of that scene is to be like oh look how cute harden was as a kid you didn't need to show a bear baby ass on my screen you didn't need to do it but you did it anyways and that's what pisses me off you're making choices movie that you didn't have to they bang i'm gonna be so upset they're gonna bang but don't finger her earlobe that feels nice i knew they were gonna have sex i knew it i knew it no hey where are you going wandering hand yeah get back north well happy birthday he didn't even remember and you're going to give him birthday sex on your birthday you're going to give him birthday sex and he didn't even remember that's true wait i'm sorry this isn't working why feel what's he feeling for your vagina doesn't work oh she's got a broken vagina oh no we should stop you should have never started nice wheels oh room bro [Laughter] i think this guy might be gay oh you know me breaking hearts and taking names i'm pretty sure he's gay i'm just getting a feeling everything's cool with the whole thing with your dad what a whole thing with my dad i thought that she would have thought she would what is going on with dad okay that was rude i'm just asking you about dad your father wanted to see you but i chased him off are they gonna really shoot her one scene of this movie from one camera angle this is so boring quit cutting back to this one straight on angle i blew it i blew it carol i don't know what happened he's crying now what a [ __ ] way to drive these two back together was that a home invasion the lines of dialogue sounded like like a pg home invasion get down and say down mommy yeah i took him to the therapist after therapist but nothing seemed to help the nightmares went away when he started seeing you oh let me vomit now she's like a magic little pill she's his cure why does your mom hate him so much because he's a piece of [ __ ] you lied to me a big lie massive lie wow what are you two gabbing on about just like past assaults and you lying to her about your entire relationship nothing big just breakfast chatter happy belated tessa's perfect day what's my perfect day hope that's for you to decide that's his gift to her he got her uh i'll do whatever you want that's worse than the kindle it requires no effort and no planning it requires literally nothing out of you no a thought and effort he just had to buy a card and said like i'll do whatever you want today and just toss at her face he's so ah i'm leaving i'm leaving right now i'm just kidding i wouldn't leave you here with the movie by yourself because you know we're in this together we gotta finish this together you and i right now i keep hitting the play button and the movie won't play i think it's a sign but if tessa is gonna ignore all the signs that tells her that hardin is a piece of [ __ ] and she shouldn't date him then i'm also gonna ignore the signs that i should stop watching this movie i will agree to without any snide remarks or tantrums he agreed to not give her grief on her birthday what a gentleman what a perfect guy [ __ ] no let his tension just melt away it's not the pose melting his tension away as the [ __ ] heat no snad remarks he broke his one promise he gave her one promise and he broke it he's not even trying you have the most amazing bone now find a partner and let's and he's making her feel self-conscious now look at that face she's putting her ass in the air trusting that she's not going to be judged and made an object of and here he is making an object of her is yoga supposed to be eternal no it's not it's supposed to be about the wellness of your body i'll do anything you want to do today except the two things that you want to do i'm going to convince you to not do them so we can go back and have sex my hatred for harden is off the charts oh great shower sex scene why did they give her a job in this movie she went to work for one day then had like a special assignment where she went clubbing on her second day of work and that's all the work that she's ever done i don't need to see another butt answer it and go that's work go to work please is there anything that you want to do no new favorite character i don't like to draw just hates everybody love it i'm in the same boat my guy now harden's going to be good with the kid where are those marks on your arms my tattoos don't people think it looks strange i don't give a [ __ ] what people think see you mate see me that was so unearned when did they bond when did they bond enough to earn this like see a mate fist ball they never earned that merry christmas it says whatever our souls are made of his and mine are the same i mean that's what it says it just says book note and infinity it says whatever our souls are made of his and minor this where does it say that is it inscribed are you not gonna show it or am i supposed to understand that when i see a book and a musical note and then the infinity sign that i should know that it means whatever our souls are made of your hers and mine are the same dog what is this movie doing it doesn't say that at all you can't just tell me something and expect me just to believe it especially when i'm looking at it stop having sex i don't need to see your thighs my guy there's no one else for me tessa no one you're what 19 you're 19. you know that for sure it's ken my wife karen and i we were no ken if ken in the first movie was peter gallagher and they recap there's no way they requested him they didn't ken scott peter gallagher this movie had a couple saving graces one of them was peter gallagher aka sandy cohen from the oc what do they do hey dylan here are your hopes here are your dreams for this movie you see this throw it in the river [ __ ] you dylan this movie just said to me i love the christmas tree inclusion here that's helping me keep my temper down but to recast the very best part of the first movie tragic oh god here comes the 14 year old boy little mr pouty [ __ ] i knew that night that i had to go no after that night you had to stay that night happened because of you you don't have to get an uber i can give you a ride after the [ __ ] you've just pulled and he's drunk not to mention you're drunk they had a good line though he's like no you don't have to leave you had to stay good boom first good line of the movie resentments like this are gonna destroy you and they're gonna take tessa right down with you okay good line yeah see here's the thing is like this stuff is interesting harden and his fractured relationship with his family this [ __ ] like she's working a job at a publishing agency and there's this new guy who hasn't been in the movie for like 30 minutes you just completely forgotten about that shit's worthless man this is good though it's a walk don't break that lamp oh okay good [Music] pardon he's so pathetic i understand you care about him but he's too pathetic we have got to stop meeting like this you're both in an elevator going up to your office why would you have to stop meeting like that i thought that things were getting better it's clear that he still has a lot of stuff he has to deal with look at this face he's so bored listening to her telling the story that we had to sit through soak that in for a minute okay this is his face listening to this tale i should get back to work he wants to leave how did no she's not typing that fast that's not humanly possible you saw her typing on a keyboard before she was like now watch her [ __ ] look at there's no way there's no way holy cringe this might be the cringiest thing i've seen so far no dialogue so i got this montage him mouthing i'm sorry he's like oh that means so much to me to be honest it wouldn't surprise me if peter gallagher turned down recurring in this movie because this is so cringy ha we're back on the right path dad i forgive you immediately he fixed the broken lamp he's a good person again tessa why aren't you in the office oh yeah i thought i thought it was kidding happy new year see i knew i liked that guy that's funny why is he not in this movie we were gonna hire someone to do digital submissions in seattle but you're better than anyone i've interviewed i'll take care of your tuition living expense i just wanted to share the good news i can't just one this guy's got one angle one camera angle like if you're just gonna give him one shot and nothing interesting else is happening in this shot then why have it it's just one angle it's the same thing with the mom before i talk to you upstairs i have a tattoo of little butterflies but you can only see it when i'm naked i love butterflies really oh they're gonna do the callback to the truth or dare and this is tessa's get back moment she's gonna do dare and she's gonna start having sex with hard right on the couch or something molly truth or dare um true is it true that you're a [ __ ] oh okay that's not really that bad are you a [ __ ] heart and such a douchebag truth or dare true is it true that you're a dumbass for getting back together with harden after he clearly [ __ ] you for a bet true i was waiting for this satisfying moment of like them going head to head is it true you're a heart is it true you're stupid come on let me enjoy one aspect of this movie god damn it they couldn't do one one scene one sequence right i'm not entertained in the least [Applause] test on your phone oh no this got a job in seattle oh no misconceptions i'm really glad we did that just keep it between us never kiss and tell thank you hey what the [ __ ] dude she was just sucking his i feel bad for that dude a little bit you know i mean she just kissed him without his consent and she had shh oh oh what the [ __ ] you act like you're so [ __ ] innocent [ __ ] you [ __ ] you how many times have they fought and gotten back together in this movie is this the third time they've broken up this movie pardon can you please pick up the phone i really need to talk to you oh car crash yeah why else would they close up on the phone she dropped on the floor because now he's gonna call her and she's gonna be like with my phone it's on the floor reach boom car crash how is she texting so fast [Music] that was so anti-climactic the phone thing didn't change anything she had a green light so someone just ran a red why does her phone need to be on the floor why couldn't she just be like looking down real quick with the phone in her lap crossing the intersection and still get ran into because it's not her fault at all i like that the shot of that the build up to it wasn't worth it but where is i'm not telling you just fights for no reason you didn't come home last night she was out looking for you how's that his fault yeah they had a fight so if you fight with somebody and then they're out looking for you is it your fault then that they're in danger because it's not like she was in a dangerous zone looking for him in danger land it's not like he went off in the cliffs went off in the mountains and then she drove off a cliff or something accidentally on a tight road you're toxic and you're bad news true and true trevor please just let me talk to her you know what's funny is i actually think this guy's got some acting chops this role is just not it's not for him man he's showing range but it's not coming off as impactful because [ __ ] story stop breaking [ __ ] be an adult you're not ready for a relationship how can you take any of this seriously these are serious themes and serious problems that i can't take seriously because the material just delivers it in such a comical way kimberly you can't marry him he's a child will you marry my dad and be my stepmom oh that i let my emotions get the best of me somehow you bring that side out of me oh he looks like a killer out there that wasn't her wasn't her she's right behind you turn around so obvious like i said this is a story you've heard before only difference is this it was written by a 15 year old girl who doesn't know how to write a good story maybe there is a happy ending for us afterwards dad dad this was no fun this was horrible do you like to go on dates because i don't but i i will with you if you want to go i've been meaning to tell you something for a long time the reason that i haven't told you is because of human resources in the workplace he's so much fun where is this fun character where has he been here's what they were thinking that had no value that little that little sequence there had no value whatsoever to the story but they put it in but because they're like this is just a fun good sequence let's put that into the film even if it's like a little thing on the end that means nothing what they feel to realize is that you could have been doing that the whole time you could just make a fun film just have to have a little bit of fun having fun having fun you can have your drama you can have your traumas and your forgiveness scenes and the fights and then the makeup sex you can have that all but what you can also do is just have a bunch of fun for some reason this movie just refused to have fun or make any sense whatsoever i am going crazy i need to end this video before i lash out any further as bad as this movie is i hope you had a good time watching this video i'm assuming this is going to be kind of fun to watch so hopefully it was i love you guys toodles

Channel: Dylan Is In Trouble

Views: 3,104,885

Keywords: after, after 2, after we collide, tessa, hardin, hessa, harry, styles, harry styles, dylan, dylan is in trouble, full movie, kiss, reaction, review, shower, scene, netflix, trailer, commentary

Id: rDlnDtq5pR0

Length: 29min 25sec (1765 seconds)

Published: Wed Oct 28 2020