Guys, What is the MOST awkward thing a girl has ever said to you? r/AskReddit Reddit Stories

guys what is the most awkward thing a girl has ever said to you have you ever raped someone before this was immediately after 100 consensual sex age 13 or 14 my first gf and i were in my parents hot tub and my very religious mother kept coming out to check on us like every five minutes being horny teenagers i had my hand in between her thighs and slowly made my way into finger her i get my finger maybe one inch inside and she says omg is that your d i was sitting next to her for the first time in all my years on reddit i finally have the best possible response for an ask credit thread during college i was invited to my friend's room to drink with her and her new roommate after a few shots we started playing this game nephew with some cards the roommate kept hitting me with a duck subliminary so it was obvious what was about to transpire my friend left her room and we immediately get down to business after around five thrust she goes stop stop stop i was worried and replied what i will remember this till the day i die she replies you're a republican right because i can't have sex with any liberals i looked her straight in the eye and said i ducking love ronald reagan edit obligatory thanks for gold kind stranger seriously though i'm glad you all got a nice laugh merry christmas read it edit two for those of you asking about the fu game google duck you pyramid you can only duck me in the ass because i want to be a virgin until i'm married a really weird way to lose my virginity instep having a sonogram of the area between my balls and my thigh they sent letter f 60 years old lady in there to do the sonogram it was clear that doe had retired from somewhere leon back to school so that she could be let her fair cue to sonogram tech and look at dubaiz all day she was so mad th letter ft she was going to have to sonogram dome 25 years old dude's balls as goon as she walked in the room she aged letter fd a scale on her face and wendell opened my chart to see what was earning on she was immediately upset day was trying to rub that petroleum conduction jelly between my balls and thigh without actually touching or moving anything deo i politely moved my [ __ ] out let her ethyneth away like any gentleman would be letter f yen and she got all flustered and dough-hearted don't touch it as if i want their masturbating or somehow getting disleisure out of the experience i've never been so mad and embarrassed at the same time her so morsi's 98 you normally sit in that chair for x class right me yeah her okay i was setting up this room for event and we finished a little early so i sat down in that chair and pretended to be you just looked around seeing how you see things me that's a nice i wear a spinal brace this happened on halloween i like that you're wearing that what i like that you're wearing that um do you know what it is no but i like that you're wearing it okay thanks her boyfriend came over to my table after a while and apologized saying she was drunk and thought it was somehow related to nintendo one time in college i was standing in the elevator in my dorm and this girl just stares at my feet and says you have really nice toes i saw her in the elevator a couple weeks later and she says to me hey you're the guy with nice toes edit yes i knew she was hitting on me no she wasn't hot edit too my toes are regular toes they have a little bit of hair on them too she told me she was a virgin nothing weird yet told me she masturbated all normal whipped out a 14 inches purple dildo that was big around as a peanut butter jar i was impressed honestly she dumped me later because i refused to get her pregnant after three weeks of dating she grabbed my d and said i can't wait to be inside you i don't need smart handsome or funny man i just need you as we are watching a porno together your d is bigger than his the porn guy oh wait he's getting harder row okay never mind once after a lonely and drunk night at the bar in which i went home alone i made an okc epid account i made my profile picture one of my cuddling with a baby elephant then pass the duck out i awoke to a raging hangover and a message in my inbox from a very large woman who had written out a list of sexual things she wanted to do to me including but not limited to sticking that elephant nose up my ass like a muppet and blowing air out my mouth like a fog horn i deleted the account calling me daddy during six with a picture of her dead father staring at me on the wall you're pretty alright for a black guy it never gets old have you thought about getting a nose job have you thought about walking home i dated a woman for about a month one day we are sitting on my couch making out she says i am not attracted to you i'm sorry i ended up losing 125 pounds after that but it still hurt like hell i've shared this before but probably this one time i went down on a girl she was really enjoying it and she said it reminded her of something of course i ask what's that and she replies when my dad used to go down on me as a girl edit for those asking she looked kinda like a redhead fiona apple with more weight from motherhood but not thick so yeah i'd say she was hot edit too it saddens me that there are so many other people out there that experienced similar things there are some truly horrible people out there doing the dirty with a girl at the time i was lasting longer than my usual 30-second self after a little bit she goes wow you're still going are you a professional or something i thought it was a joke so i laughed a bit she was serious though and asked again seriously have you ever done porn no guy has lasted this long it was awkward at first but the six was good and she had some giant titties so i just kept going i had a girl in high school tell me that no one would date me because i am too much like a puppy and no one wants to duck a puppy which would be hurtful and not that weird except that she then followed it up with but i ducked the pieces she told me that she didn't like cats and that i had to choose between her spending the night or keeping my cat as attractive as she was the cat stayed she left i was sitting alone at a bar around 10 p.m on a wednesday night about one drink in a drunk soccer mom sat down next to me and blurted out i'm old enough to be your mom are you single she must have been mid-40s i was 24. on my first date with a girl i met online she explained mid dinner how once upon a time she was giving her boyfriend had the night after a party and could taste lady juice she therefore deduced he was cheating on her and dumped him with [ __ ] somehow we still ended up having six single male brain decision making baffles me sometimes i still don't understand it she was drunk i was drunk we just met we flirted we were on a friend's front porch waiting for that friend to come back with food we kept flirting but neither one of us made a move we were also getting hungrier and wondering what kind of food our friend would bring back we hoped for pizza and salad from this trendy pizza place nearby somehow the two desires hunger and flirting got crisscrossed in her head she turned towards me leaned clothes gazed into my eyes and in a seductive voice said if i was salad how hard would you abuse me do you have a girlfriend proceeds to puke she was hot i got a little drunk at the bar while talking with a woman i had just met one thing led to another and we were back at my place bumping uglies everything was going fine until she said i don't believe in soulmates but i do believe there is one d made for one [ __ ] and yours is made for mine followed by please be real is this happening please be happening i hope this is real needless to say that freaked me out edit i failed to mention while walking to my apartment she said you don't know i'm not a murderer and proceeded to fake push me in front of a geep id brain was working much harder than my logic brain after that we're gonna have a baby babe after having unprotected six the first time am i the only girl reading through this hoping nothing i've said is up here cam can i touch it no it that's why it's out nothing when i asked my wife to marry me she froze for a few minutes eventually cried and said yes but that silence lasted years in my head while on a tinder date the girl asked me what her name was my mind completely blanked i managed to play it off as a joke for a few minutes and then check tinder and remind myself of her name i've never felt so uncomfortable in my life edit typo just yesterday a girl leaned in to kiss me and she leaned in for it she said so how is nan i just started laughing right in her face i couldn't help it thankfully she laughed at it too a couple of hours later i leaned it to kiss her and in the huskiest voice i could manage said nan is really great [Music] my friend which i had a huge crush which he didn't know about randomly said you're a nice guy but you're not tall enough my confidence dropped the last time i was fingered on the bed i it all over the place needless to say i stayed away from the chocolate starfish i was in college at a party i started a conversation with this girl and after five minutes she said you're a guy i would marry not date in college a thanks i guess i was 19 she was 35 after six she asked me if i would do it again but not use a condom she said i didn't have to be in their life if i didn't want to she just wanted a baby your d taste like ketchup and dogs are humans too [Music] i once had this girl legitimately say huba huber as we were getting down to it i immediately laughed she joined in i took the piss out of her for about a week afterwards edit sorry guys i'm british to take the piss out of someone means to mock them this has sort of been a weird awakening about how weird british slang is my ex asked if i would helicopter my flax cd for her your fly is down you need help fixing that on the bus edit this was on public transit i was dirty as hell from work and she wasn't that cute well she didn't say anything exactly the most awkward moment i ever experienced with a girl though the church i was around 12 maybe 13 the preacher's daughter was in my sunday school class and was insanely hot she also went to my school and to say i had a crush on this girl is an understatement i was borderline obsessed and yet i'd never spoken a word to her now for whatever reason was wearing a relatively short skirt that day with pantyhose i staring off into space and at one point i was looking down at the ground between her feet i thought to myself she probably would think i was trying to look up a dress if she noticed the placement of my head just in that moment i moved my gaze up to see her staring at me directly at me disgusted she scaled and then pushed her knees together so that her vulva would no longer be visible before you ask yes i am lying i was looking up a dress and yes i saw exactly what i was looking for i apologize for betraying your trust i apologize to her for betraying hers i wish i loved you this was kinda heartbreaking and awkward she was drunk i'm at the movies with my girlfriend standing out in the lobby another girl that i knew from years ago in school spots me from the distance and approaches us as she exclaims oh my god my name is that you i respond yep hi her name is that your girlfriend yep all still awkward she then then runs off to her movie and my girlfriend starts cracking up apparently she agreed i had a woman tell me that i had pretty eyes then she said she wished she could cut them out and make them her own i didn't know if she meant to put in her head somehow keep a souvenir she didn't sound like she was joking or anything i smiled and kind of giggled and went on this happened when i was 12 edit this is apparently more common than i thought and that's kind of scary i can't wait for you to meet my mom would it be weird if your kid called me mom let me look through your phone to get to know you better all of this from an internet hookup i didn't even hook up with the first night we met i was in the pool with my co-workers lifeguard and we were having chicken fights one girl says to another girl hey get on mr buzzy's shoulders he's tall she responds and they played without me idk why she laughed but i was very hurt trying to convince this girl to swallow as i was like 20 seconds from coming she never swallowed she was a bit drunk she said i'll swallow if you take some of it too i burst out laughing we were in her parents house and we were supposed to be quiet a combination of alcohol blue balls oh and that weird comment i couldn't stop laughing she was so serious too later in the relationship she would swallow would have to buy her a snapple kiwi strawberry so she can drink some of it and swallow it edit those asking ye this was in college still am i was at walmart with three of my soon-to-be roommates for college we saw a cheap table ones that are plastic that fold down and because we are poor college kids i mentioned that we should get it for our house out of nowhere some girl turns the corner and yelled i can be wild's table still not 100 sure what it meant but it sure sounded like she wanted an orgy since when do girls talk to me my ex-girlfriend during six she would always like push me away and tell me stop then she would continue to say what the duck don't stop you are supposed to grab me choke me and keep going i want you to abuse me she says i respond with but what if at some point you don't want me to abuse you and i actually abuse you i am not taking that chance i ended up getting drunk and choking her and really not letting her push me off as i was close to getting off then she got all upset cause she really wanted me to stop i was like what the duck you make sick some confusing game of chess duck off and i left she was trying to be nice and told me i'd make a nice back up if her first few choices don't work out she couldn't wrap her dumb little head around why that wasn't a compliment i was 13 and it was the time of year for a physical always embarrassing but you grit your teeth and bear with it the doctor was a normal looking doctor an older man no big deal pants are about to drop and he asks do you mind if our intern assists my position was too compromised for me offer any response beyond a nod of agreement so i agree in walks a gorgeous 24 yo blonde girl who then proceeds to check me for hernias while i desperately try in vain to hold back an erection then she spoke everything seems normal x was giving me a [ __ ] and was deep throating it i don't know how well you can deep throat a d that doesn't touch the back of your throat well she shoved as far as she could and said look mom no hands she then proceeded to tell me a story of how she gave a guy a blow job with a 12 inches d and she shoved it all in and said look mom no hands i dipped mighty in crazy and i can't escape the consequences had just finished having sex with my casual duck buddy and the routine was she'd get up and leave right after us to keep if casual no overnight visits we're both dressed and i'm headed for the door when i look back and see her on the floor looking for something i say oh did you lose an earring or something and hop down to help her find it she replies no i pulled my bloody tampon out right before we started and tossed it so you wouldn't notice but now i can't find it i shot back up she found it and i showed her the door i'm not usually squeamish with periods etc but knowing there's a gross used bloody tampon on my floor somewhere that she just tossed was enough to make me shudder edit i did not shutter i shuddered hooked up with a girl and saw her out again at a bar a week later we start flirting and go to my car to fool around not a minute into it she starts saying adam i love you i love you adam this was literally our second time together ah and my name's not adam was in uni and some girl came up during class and said wow this is such a weird word don't you think and after i agreed she kept aggressively pushing how weird it was she was pretty cute and i think she was trying to hit on me but it was just so ridiculous i didn't know how to work it [Music] you

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Id: enAuR2i6vs0

Length: 18min 41sec (1121 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 30 2021