Bosses, What's the Craziest Thing You've Seen an Employee Do? r/AskReddit Reddit Stories

bosses have read it what's the craziest thing you've seen an employee do caught my boss getting a bj from one of the sales women she didn't realize her heels were visible from the three inches gap between the floor and front panel on his desk i said nice shoes vicky turned around and walked out watched a cashier ring up his friend and pretty much give him everything for free nobody likes the store but don't make it so obvious hr hired an employee to work on the mine i manage he showed up 45 minutes late wearing shorts and crocs i proceeded to fire him on the spot got a framed letter from corporate jokingly congratulating me for having the shortest tenured employee in company history edit spelling i manage a small world shop generally i don't care about less than clean background checks or pot as long as you come into work every day and get it done finding reliable welders is difficult so a lot of it flies this sometimes leads to weird employees this one guy we hired stopped showing up after like three days days he walks in the door he's bright red from being sunburned to it and his clothes are torn to shreds dude was drinking on a little aluminum boat and somehow got lost at sea he looked like tom hanks from castaway he didn't have cell phone reception so he wasn't able to call me he did take a bunch of pictures over the few days he was lost at sea though including one where he was being rescued by the coast guard i gave him the rest of the week off cost guard took him to the hospital he checked himself out and immediately came into work didn't even go home and shower odd dude guy that worked for me was getting out of his car one morning and saw one of the other managers in the company so started talking to him in the middle of the conversation he whipped his d out and started peeing on the side of his car he was 37 years old sober and it was eight in the morning this was for a corporate job had a see-through water bottle that was filled with vodka he started the day off fine but was legless by lunch drove him home 40 mins each way because he couldn't afford a cab talked the owner out of firing him and instead we helped him get into a program that was four years ago he's a production manager now model employee now in fact i once fired a guy and he tried to go back to work his crush was in the clock in room when i had to tell him to leave again he cried on my shoulder as i walked him out of the building not because i fired him but because i told him to leave in front of his crush edit just for clarification i meant a woman he found attractive not the delicious soda brand however i could understand crying for the orange goodness i was doing a weekly call monitor on one of my better employees and found he was doing an indian accent i was a bit surprised so i went back and listened to five plus calls of his from that week and found he was doing different impressions for almost every call arnold schwarzenegger mickey mouse apple from the simpsons pretty solid christopher walken and a few others in the navy we had a broken accommodation ladder it's a stairway attached to the ship for embarkation and debarkation that isn't always used if there is a brown appear it was due for inspection and rather than fail the inspection the guys just unbolted it and let it fall overboard back in the retail book industry in ages past i had this employee he would take a bathroom break anytime an employee got called into the office why well because he had discovered somehow that if you went to the men's room and stood on the toilet and lifted one of the ceiling tiles you could sort of make out conversations in the manager's office that was adjacent he also discovered during one of his frequent smoke breaks that there was an access hallway for ground maintenance this was in a shopping mall of swords that also had a ladder that went to the roof he'd occasionally vanish and basically go sit on the roof if no one could find him he couldn't get in trouble he figured i was a supervisor at a bulk food store had a staff member who was responsible for sweeping the floors he would regularly snack on what he swept up a girl in a non-clinical pediatric hospital job she was like 19 stroke 20 and kind of weird apparently she had a crush on me but i brushed it off because she was weird and obviously that was unprofessional i knew she came from a relatively messed up home but she was fairly normal outside of being goofy and awkward one day she got caught giving a patient a [ __ ] in his room and my first thought was oh my god this is a pediatric hospital but luckily for her the patient was 18. there are some kids with congenital disorders who see specialists all their life and aren't just suddenly dropped on their 18th birthday they sort of slowly transition and he was one of them that was unfortunately the beginning of the end for her as life became a train wreck afterward she soon got knocked up by someone else gained like 100-150 lbs and had a severely autistic child she is constantly posting on facebook and it's the saddest it ever like anyone want to have a play date with and i zero comments or likes then randomly she'll just have massive breakdowns about how hard it is to have a severely autistic child who can barely walk her kid is 4-5 and how she has no friends or anything it's horribly sad back when i was a gas station clerk my manager would deal drugs while on the clock he'd take people into the back office to talk to we all knew what he was doing mostly because he all but admitted it and because we all knew someone eventually said something and then the company tried to make him take a drug test he just quit instead a guy went for his lunch break and came back drunk we were delivery drivers when i was a kid working at a grocery store another cashier would often buy and then chug a half gallon of milk to get sick to go home job was horrid so it was entertaining at the time as a sergeant in the army my unit was out on a two-week field exercise one of my soldiers decided to drink a dozen boxes of shelf stable whole milk he gets sick and has to go back to the rear we find out later that he is quite lactose intolerant and knew it for years before going to the field he bragged to some of his buddies about the scam and one of the other ncos heard him that started the investigation that got him demoted for malingering we had a guy that would vanish in the middle of the day for roughly three four hours then return at the end of the day come to find out he would go home during that time play with his dogs smoke weed and then come back to work when we had to sit him down and explain he couldn't just leave he totally flipped out and told us all to go f ourselves into if i fire him he got a warning and still works here and hr still does nothing when he disappears went out for smoke breaks like 5x a day eventually got to a point where he couldn't wait to get outside and would light up in the elevator to get a head start two days after that mishap he took his lunch break and came back very drunk i think he worked a grand total of seven days hired to fired was cashier manager at big box store there was a useless kid that finally stopped showing up a few days go by and i see him walking so i assume he's going to come up front and we can do the whole formal exit process since he missed shifts he never comes up front nobody has heard from him so a few weeks go by and we just terminated him we go back to the lunchroom one day and useless kid is sitting there i ask what he's doing and he says he's on break i'm like lol no you stopped showing up weeks ago and were terminated he leaves to go back to work i confirmed with all managers he was fired not working in another part of the store he shows up in the lunchroom again a few weeks later turned out he didn't want to tell his mom he doesn't want to work he kept letting her drop him off he'd hang in the lunchroom for a bit because his mom apparently is friendly with another employee so this way it looks like he still has the job to his mom we noticed that she was falling asleep a lot of work so that got all of our attention she usually took 10 minute naps through the day which isn't a big deal because you can have brakes but our alarms went up one of the employees heard a crinkling beer can in the bathroom one day saw her come out the bathroom and check the trash cans 10 minutes later beer confirmed also some weird blood spots on paper towels too we searched her belongings and found several other beer cans and a funnel noticed that she didn't have any alcohol on her breath mfw we realized she was butt chugging the miller high life to get lit at work i had an employee call a french woman a frog and then start reviting that was kinda awkward used to work with this girl that would watch porn as she was operating her machine she'd prop her phone up on the control board and just watch as if it was a sitcom or summit co-workers went to her supervisor to let him know and he had to have a sit down with her she was oblivious to the fact that watching shows on your phone while you work was prohibited let alone pornhub [Music] saw a dude fall asleep on a stand-up forklift how tired must you be to do that company hired a contractor to take on some database development the guy was hired as senior database engineer contracts to hire he was 53 so he's had experience he proceeded to do so bad on a project that we had to ask forgiveness from a client refund all their support hours and have our junior developer who was later promoted due to good work reader the contractors two-month project it took the junior dev one week 35 hours full stop took a temp job leading the santa's village at base pro while waiting on my contract to start at my career job the people you hire are usually interesting one girl on her first shift was on her phone as i walked back to the department i wasn't in uniform yet but told her you aren't supposed to be on your phone on shift she screams who the f k are you i walked away clocked in wrote her up and came back to her with right up she turned out to be one of the better employees i had an employee call and tell me her mother died well i got an anonymous phone call from someone telling me she was lying so i called the number i had on file to send my regards and i get an address to send flowers in the meantime the office had collected an envelope of money to help with the costs of the funeral and missing work when i called the mother answered and was shocked to find out her daughter used her death as an excuse to go to vegas for the weekend when she returned i helped a big meeting with everyone in the office and presented her with the envelope of money and flowers she took it and faked cried i called her into my office to reveal that i knew and fired her and took the envelope back she said she didn't give a duck and left capital h the owner's nephew was brought on to be an assistant manager in the same night he ducked some random floozy on the office desk on top of the staff paychecks and when we closed up for the night he stumbled into the bar next door where i was having a night cap with industry friends he didn't see me but he threw his credit card down and said i'm a club owner i drink for free here he kept shouting that until he was asked to leave he didn't last long not too crazy but pretty stupid i had a girl that worked for me at a mortgage company pull the credit report of her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend no idea how she got her social security number and then went on the girl's facebook page posting messages about all of her debt and past due accounts and the crappy kinds of car that she drives btc got an angry call from the girl who ended up being a pain in my butt for a while edit forgot an interesting part we fired the girl and about a week later an agent from the department of treasury comes in asking questions about the girl turns out she was being investigated for a series of fraudulent things including operating as a loan officer without a license and taking out a bunch of federal student loans in her grandfather's name he wanted information because in investigating learned that she had been fired from the company for some sort of malfeasance and he wanted the details she went to jail for a while eventually the owner made me cut towers while keeping his son on a full time as a silent protest everyone took an extra long smoke break that day when i went outside to corolla troops i overheard the craziest thing an employee defending me against the charges i was a weak ass kisser who failed to stand up for them he's got to feed his family just like everybody else and she continued to defend me even after the others labelled her a quizling which was really crazy given the state of education in america i'm shocked they even knew what that meant [Music] caught the ceo having sex with the clinical director in a post-op bed in a surgical unit i was ceo three stroke five members of my team were caught sleeping multiple times twice in front of clients the other two team members actually took pictures they knew they were in the wrong but kept it up anyway i finally got the pictures showed them to my boss he called a meeting in said meeting the three of them argued that their privacy was invaded and who took the pictures and this is unacceptable i simply said you're sleeping on the job and we are giving you a warning they do good work and i didn't want them to lose their jobs over a really stupid mistake to today those three guys feel like they were outed and snitched on super target delhi had an employee eat food from the deli in the walk-in freezer which was the only place without cameras he was shivering and holding an entire meatloaf mouthful i couldn't stop laughing not a boss but used to work for a msp they had an office with a big tile missing in the ceiling apparently they had this accountant who was working late one night next day everyone comes into the office and they find said sealing hole turns out the accountant heard god calling her from the ceiling she proceeded to climb up a desk into the ceiling and managed to get into one of the offices next door had an employee that was always falling asleep while riding around from job to job it was time for him to get his cdl for the company and had to travel about two hours away for testing halfway into his trip we checked where he was and the truck had been running for an hour about 45 minutes from the test site at a truck stop had to call a gas station attendee go wake him up still hadn't contacted me about 30 minutes later we get a call from a guy that he had run off the road the company name and number is on the side of the truck we checked the gps and it showed him driving 70 miles per hour down to 20 miles per hour right around the time the incident happened he ended up passing his test and making it back to the shop i asked him what the duck is he on heroin he said no i was smoking meth all night honesty isn't always the best policy had an employee go for a drug test mandatory for all drivers with a cdl he used his 10 year old son's urine and warmed it up on the defroster in his car on the way to the test center the center called and told us they were surprised he was alive his urine was 130 degrees needles to say he wasn't employed much longer this guy always tried to hide at work to avoid working one day i was looking for him and i stepped into the bathroom i notice a shoe print on the back of the toilet and i look up and one of the ceiling tiles is pushed a little to the side i climb up there and this mother ducker is hiding in the ceiling i was a valet captain at an expensive restaurant with a parking lot two blocks away and one of the valets i was supervising took a wrong turn in a customer's 2016 audi rs7 and ended up getting pulled over and arrested for going 110 in a 70 on the interstate i have so many stories about this dude me and my former boss interviewed him for a position in it and i got a really weird vibe but my boss was really impressed by his cv lots of stuff like cisco certification course teacher and i was about to quit so i didn't really put up a fight about it and he was hired day two he brought in a three feet long rc helicopter and pull it in his office day three he was told to order a laptop for himself part of the job was ordering its stuff and bought the most expensive computer he could find i'm talking titanium and a 10k dollar sign price tag day four he ordered office chair in leather with built-in massage stuff day five big argument with my boss and he was told he couldn't do anything without me approving it first day eight he told me he wanted to apply for public ips for every single piece of equipment at all the company offices several thousand types because nat sucked turns out he didn't know what it was cisco teacher remember day nine he changed the domain admin password to a password some dudes attract channel had told him was the most secure password in the world around day 15 he told me he needed time off cause his girlfriend had left him for his rc heli instructor and he was scared she would take stuff from their apartment there is so much more he was fired a few weeks after i left last i heard he was selling vpn services to people using his own home broadband connection i am a supervisor for a pretty strict no-nonsense german company a lot of our employees are have a constant feeling of despair and let it be known some situations that have happened are below one poop smeared all over the bathroom stalls every day for weeks two carvings in the bathroom wall of tyranny despair manager is not god competing company pays much better etc three admittedly the company treats employees badly an employee's car was totaled when a neglected light pole fell on it the company refuses to pay for it and it has been in the parking lot for months after about two months every single manager in the building had their expensive cars keyed i wasn't the manager yet but was still working with her i came into work one morning and she was sleeping in the chair i tried waking her up but it didn't work called a friend at our sister hotel and she came and woke her up she was very disoriented she drank while at work and it was obvious she mixed stuff in a 2-liter she then quit and then a little bit later they re-hired her i didn't think it was such a good idea but they still did it and she ended up being a no-call no-show not a boss but one guy i used to work with was mentally unstable as we later found out at first he seemed normal but after a while he just kind of snapped started talking about just wait till my dead brother gets here and we're gonna shoot up the place and also warned my mom the secretary it's a family business he was gonna go get a gun and light up my brother told my the secretary that he wished there was a firefighter type pole leading from the upstairs office to the shop floor so he could land on a specific guy's head and jump up and down yelling punish punish punish one day he taped up the windows in the garage door separating two sections of our building he would routinely hit walls and part washers one of the strangest things was after a bad storm one night he came into work and apologized to my dad the boss man for the storm it was his fault because he got angry and broke a walking stick which made god mad and sent the storm as a punishment after we finally got rid of him after he ended up being put in a psych ward my parents were in our small hometown about 30 minutes away visiting family and they saw him at a gas station on the way home he chased them down and and my dad pulled over to get out and find out what he wanted not a smart idea i know turns out he wanted to apologize for everything in that he was back on new meds to help it all and ask for his job back before we went crazy he was a really nice guy him and i got along really well but guess sometime you never know not an employer but mine sure was pissed we had a co-worker that called out of work left early all the time balling her eyes out because her dad was in and out of the hospital in very bad condition we all felt so bad for her rushed to cover her shifts offered whatever we could do to help shortly after i got a different job i heard she had called out for a whole week because her dad had died and she had to help plan the funeral the company sent their condolences we all offered our help some more a few days later another co-worker checked this girl's snapchat and found dozens of pictures of her and her friends going out to clubs and partying all week shortly after she brought this up to the gm they saw her dad walking around the mall out store was in they talked to him and found out he'd never even had the flu that while time much less been in the hospital she got fired and then text spam the other co-worker to please talk to the gm i know i ducked up but please you gotta help me i'm not a boss but i worked as a bouncer at this bar venue that did special events this one night we had the chippendales strippers come to an event we had a new guy start on this shift who was a bit older than the rest of the employees during the show he starts start stripping in the crowd collecting tips instead of working the chippendale's manager gets pissed and starts yelling at him saying he's stealing his strippers money after that he stops stripping but keeps just flirting with women in the crowd and not working at all near the end of the night we start cleaning up and notice we can't find a new employee someone takes the trash out to the dumpster and sees he's ducking some chick in his car 20 minutes later he walks back like nothing happened but then instead of helping finish cleaning gets in an argument that lasts the rest of the shift with one of the bartenders because i guess he was sexually harassing her all night also find out he is married and has a kid my boss called him in and fired him the next day he didn't understand why was middle management at my old job i had a team below me but plenty of awful people above me had one of my people specifically request only closing shifts because it was easier on her family for child care purposes after a month of this she itched at my ducking awful boss about no shift diversity he talked with me about it ignored that fact that she had requested it and demanded i give her day shifts so i gave her three day shifts she missed all of them blamed me for not giving her the night shift she wanted my duck wad boss yelled at me for giving her day shifts too despite me telling him this would happen when he forced me to do it initially fired the girl for missing so many shifts she recruited five guys the fathers of her various children to come yell at me for ruining her source of income referred to a chinese customers baby as a cute little chunky when my co-worker who also happens to have asian heritage pointed out that it was incredibly racist the employee replied oh it's fine my boyfriend is black the weird part is he was filipino not black as if it excuses racism anyway she was shocked when we didn't renew her contract well i'm not a boss anymore but i got a story worked at a wing zone in college managed for a little while had a sport high energy kid working as cook one night he was into science experiment type ranks one night when i went paying attention to him and focused on orders going out he got caught up on his cooking and wanted to eat dinner he went next door to publix and bought something to eat along with some dry ice they keep stored by the freezer section he had talked up making a dry ice bomb earlier which i figured he would do outside but once he got back he disappeared he and a driver ran out front and grabbed me on the way out once we got out of the store there was the loudest sound i've heard like shotgun blast or firecracker shot at close range and all the doors in the store and walk-in cooler flew open for a second when the blast hit we go back in and walk into the cooler nothing seemed any different though when the dry ice knob was gone finally someone looks up and behold a 20-ounce bottle stuck straight into the stainless steel ceiling of the cooler the kid had to hang his weight on it to pull it out i can't say i was mad because no one or thing was hurt and it's not my store i was impressed and encouraged the scientific spirit just next time do it outside it's people like that kid that make life kind of fun i hope he became a badass science teacher she angrily defecated on my desk after i wrote her up for hiding in the bathroom for two hours to play candy crush one of my employees had a bonfire at his house i was there with some of the other employees till pretty late got a call early the next morning from the employee that was at the party who was supposed to open said he was sick and wasn't going to be to come in dude i just saw you a few hours ago remember you had better be at work i ended up firing him a few months later be a productive worker and ask for more projects once they finish what they work on they're mad i tell ya i had an employee who had six regularly in the bathroom he said is there a problem that keeps me sane if i am stressed i was speechless i worked in a call center which should be all that needs to be said i once caught an agent cutting out lines of coke and then snorting them i caught countless agents breaking a park pot to roll up in joints blunts pack a bowl i had a girl walk into one of my training sessions grab the waste basket and proceed to pull all of her weave out had a girl disappear from my training class and we later found her passed out in a puddle of her own it piss and vomit and the handicapped stall in the bathroom had a lady who was too damn lazy to get up and walk to the restroom so she decided to just get her pants at her desk then proceed to shake the turd out of her pants leg i have so many stories from that place i have seriously considered writing a screenplay not an employer boss but i used to work at a bank in the uk and the forklift driver went on the tannoy as the store was closing this is a customer announcement could you all pick up your things and duck off out of the store we all need to go to the pub thank you as he turned round the store manager was behind him you can imagine what happened [Music] you

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Id: 9LsynOJS3xo

Length: 27min 58sec (1678 seconds)

Published: Tue Jan 11 2022