- [whistles] - Come on, it's picture time! <i> [rock music]</i> <i> - ♪ In the Loud House
The Really Loud House! ♪</i> <i> [bright instrumental music]</i> - Today is a big day. Today is the day
Lincoln Loud becomes a man. And I am super pumped. I've always been known
as the man with the plan, but tonight, I'm gonna
take it up a notch. My best friend Clyde and I
will be watching the "Rip Hardcore
Midnight Marathon" and getting our official
Macho Man badges. <i> - Ooh!
Watch my midnight marathon.</i> <i> Yeah!</i> <i> Put in promo code "MACHOMAN."</i> <i> Oh, yeah. Macho!</i> <i> And I will personally send
you your Macho Man badge.</i> -<i> Macho Man badges
are not gender specific.</i> <i> Rip Hardcore
isn't just super ripped.</i> <i> He's super woke
and super ripped.</i> - I am totally getting
that Macho Man badge! - There's nothing
cooler than a badge. That's why I want to join
the FBI as a badge maker. - Maybe I'll even
grow some chest hair. - Too pink?
[toilet flushing] - When you're the only boy
in the family with 10 sisters, you learn two things. Number one, always
put the toilet seat down when you're finished.
- Ahh! Lincoln!
- My bad. - Where's my lucky guitar pick?
- And number two-- - Hey, stinkhead. - You got to reserve
your TV time. - Hops farted again! - I've even staked out
my favorite spot on the couch. [grunts] Guess this one's out of flips. The only thing left to do
is prepare the midnight snacks. - [snores] - Ah, the life of a chef. Poor guy works too hard. Dad? Dad? - Step aside, Lincoln. This is a job
for my gag flower. - Does that thing even work? OK, then. [squelching] - And now it's out of water. - Where am I? What day is it? Did I miss my half birthday? - My dad loves
his half birthday. - Last thing I remember
is coming into the kitchen to fix a late-night chocolate
cake for my half birthday, which I love.
- Told you. - ♪ It's my half, half,
half birthday ♪ ♪ It's my half birthday ♪ [screams] [thud, clatter] - Hello, Father. - Lucy scared the ding-dang
dickens out of me, but only because it was
the middle of the night. She doesn't scare me
during the day anymore. [screams] [thuds] - I don't see what's
so scary about me. <i> [bloodcurdling scream]</i> I'll get that later. - [exhales] What were
you doing up in the middle of the night anyway? - If you must know,
I've been up 58 hours straight for my mortician club's
Three Nights of Fright. - 58 hours? Lincoln,
family meeting whistle. [whistle blares] - Another two-hour meeting where Dad goes on
like an old man. [all chattering]
- Order! [all chattering] - Order! - Zip it, people! [chattering stops] Your father said order. - That I did. Now--[clears throat] as some of you may have heard-- - We know! Tomorrow is your half birthday! - Tomorrow is my half birthday. But that's not what
this meeting's about. But feel free to mark
it in your calendars. [chuckles] Moving on. Lucy-- - What? - --has been up
for three days straight. And last night, she scared
the bejesus out of me. So there's gonna be
a new rule around here. - Probably gonna be no
more sneaking up on people. <i> [dramatic chord]</i>
- You think so? - [gasps] You should really
start wearing a bell. - And the new rule is-- <i> [dramatic music]</i> --everyone goes to bed
before midnight, not one minute later. - No! This isn't fair!
It's Lucy's fault! Why should we have to suffer? - Exactly, Dad. [all chattering] - Order! Order! Don't make me have to count. Here we go. 1, 2-- [chatter stops] [exhales] - You did it, honey. - Sorry I had to be
so harsh with them. In this house, it's all
for one and one for all. - And Lucy's not the first kid
to make a mistake. - Yeah, Mom's right. You've all been responsible for new rules around here. <i> [upbeat music]</i> - What? You said we could have
one bowl of ice cream. - New rule! - One normal-sized bowl
of ice cream per kid. - By the way,
we're out of mint chip. - Really? The whole time?
- The whole time. [hissing] - Don't worry. El Diablo won't hurt you. I found him in the sewer. - (whispering) New rule. - No bringing home stray pets. - Sorry, Mud Pie. [moos] - Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. It is not up for debate! Effective today, no one
stays up past midnight. <i> [dramatic drum music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> Now I'm gonna go clean
and repair Vanzilla. I don't want to do it tomorrow
because tomorrow is my, uh, half--
- We know! - Feel free to mark it
in your calendars. - I need to come up
with a plan. - This is not fair. - Man, that guy's obsessed
with his half birthday. <i> [ding]</i> - Bingo! [all chattering] - OK, so here's the plan. Tonight at midnight,
you guys take Dad out to Jean Juan's French Mex for a half birthday
celebration. I will stay here and watch the "Rip Hardcore
Midnight Marathon" and get my Macho Man badge. - Look, Lincoln, I'm only home
from college for two days. And we all have
a lot of stuff to do. So if you want us to help you, you're gonna have to help us
with our stuff. - Yeah.
- What do you need help with? [all speaking at once] - Clyde? Got a code-- - Red? - How did you know that? - Let's just say
I "red" your mind. - OK. Clyde and I will help
you with your stuff, but we have to get moving
because the clock is ticking. <i> - Macho.</i> - Clincoln McCloud,
let's do this. Hah! - I need you to help me
brush my pageant wigs. - Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. - Good job. Here's the rest of them. <i> [dramatic tone]</i> Oh. There's more. <i> ♪ ♪</i> - [sighs] - Somebody stole
my boss's tofu sandwich from the break room,
and now she wants all of us to take a lie detector test. I need to practice
telling the truth. Any time you lie, it buzzes. - OK, you're not the only
sister I have to help. How long will this take? - It'll go really fast.
[buzzer blares] Kind of fast.
[buzzer blares] It might take
a really long time. [bell dings] But just ask me
an easy question. - Am I your favorite brother?
- Yes. [buzzer blares] - Leni, I'm your only brother. - I know, but sometimes you
can be a little annoying. [buzzer blares]
Pretty annoying. [buzzer blares]
OK, fine. You're really annoying. [bell dings] - OK, so I need
a really funny closing joke for my comedy act. What do you think? Have a great night. And if you're driving home,
please take a car. - [chuckles] Oh my gosh,
that is so funny. Great job. 'Kay, bye. - Not so fast. I got about 50 other options,
and you're not leaving until you hear them all. Two fish are in a tank,
and one of them says, how do you drive this thing? Why did the chicken cross
the playground? To get to the other slide. - Bobby literally
sent me the most romantic anniversary text. I tried to send him one,
but I think I need your help. - I'm sure what
you wrote is great. - "Bobby, I literally love
that you never litter. "If you literally ever litter,
you pick it up later, "which is literally
not littering. Happy anniversary." Was that awful?
- Literally. - Tomorrow is my hockey team's
championship game, and I need to come up with
the perfect motivational speech to, uh-- - Motivate them?
- Yes! See, this is why I need you,
Mr. Good-with-Words Guy. Let me give you
what I got so far. [clears throat] We got to win this game,
you space wasters! [thuds]
- Oh! [air horn blares] - I'm entering Todd
in a robotics competition, and it seems another contestant
also has a robot named Todd. - Why can't he change
his robot name? - [sighs] His Todd was named after his
recently deceased grandfather. Some guys have all the luck. - So you need me to come up
with a new name for Robot Todd? - Precisely.
- How about Beau? - No.
- Jamie? - Lame-y. This is a list of names
that I don't like. - We've been here for hours. - The world record for a guinea
pig jump is 48 centimeters. Sprinks here is gonna
shatter that record by a full 2 centimeters. But according to the big shots
at Guinness, I need a witness to verify it. Fly, Sprinks! <i> [triumphant music]</i> <i> [music fades]</i> Probably just nerves. [electric guitar playing] ♪ ♪ - Oh, hey, little dude. I'm just finishing up
this banging track. But it's missing a little
sultry Southern sound, a.k.a. the cowbell. So grab a drumstick. I need some cowbell. - Lincoln, where are you? - I got to go. Lucy? [door creaks] <i> [eerie music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> Lucy? [screams] - Hello, Brother. - Please stop doing that. - She scared me too. - Let's not mention this in
our Macho Man applications. - Why don't we just
ask your dad if he'll change
the bedtime rule? - He's fixing Vanzilla today. It's not a good time
to ask him for stuff. - I am not a good mechanic! I just wanted to replace
the windshield wiper fluid! - I need to stay up
for five more hours to complete
my Three Nights of Fright. And although I'd never admit
it to my fellow club members, I'm fading. I need you to keep me awake. - This isn't gonna work,
Lincoln. We're running out of time. You have too many sisters. - That's it, Clyde!<i>
[ding]</i> I just had another idea. Come with me.<i>
[upbeat music]</i> You need a cowbell player
to go with your blaring solos. You need to stay awake. <i> ♪ ♪</i> You need to know
if your joke's actually funny. You need to practice
telling the truth. You need your guinea pig
to set a world record. - [grunts] - You need to practice
your motivational speaking. - Let's do this!
- Yeah! - You need to write your
boyfriend a romantic text. Clyde can help you write it. He's the best at this stuff. - I wouldn't say I'm the best. [clears throat] Bobby, how lucky am I that
in this infinite universe, our souls exist in the same
place at the same time? Love that is true,
love that is real, love that is love. - Oh, Clyde. That is literally so perfect. - My dads and I watch a lot
of romantic comedies together. Oh, and if you could
run through an airport and read him your text right
before he gets on an airplane, that'd be ideal. <i> [text whooshes]</i> - I did it! I sent the perfect text! [music playing] ♪ ♪ - I laid down
the perfect track. - I stayed up
for 72 hours straight. [thuds] - I said sprocket, not socket. - [laughs]
That was a really funny joke. [bell dings] - I wrote a funny closing joke! - I told the truth! - You gotta ask
yourself one question-- how bad do I want it? Now go get it! <i> [dramatic triumphant music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> Yes! - I'm getting
in the "Guinness Book"! - I wrote the perfect speech! - Yes! [both grunt] - [gasps]
I brushed all my pageant wigs! - All that's left
to do is come up with a name for Lisa's robot,
and then operation watch "Rip Hardcore"
and get my Macho Man badge while you guys take Dad out for his half birthday
is ready to launch with time to spare. [clock ticking]<i>
- Macho.</i> - I may be a genius, Lola. - But what do you think's
gonna happen when Dad notices you're not at his party? - I didn't think about that. If Dad sees I'm not there, then he's gonna want
to come get me. How could I have missed this? I'm the man with the plan,
but my plan was flawed. I have to be here
to get my Macho Man badge, but I have to be there
so Dad doesn't find out I skipped his party. - Too bad you can't
be two places at once. - Or can I? <i> [ding]</i> The man with the plan is back. Lincoln. - Excuse me? - We're gonna name
your robot Lincoln. <i> [mariachi music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> [mechanical whirring] - I am having such a good time. [chuckles] Gwen, how's that beef baguette
in a bread bowl? - Great. Perfect pre-game meal for my hockey championship
tomorrow. Carbo load! - You still need
to chew carbs, sweetie. - I do? <i> [rock music]</i> - So the man with the plan
came through again. In 13 minutes, we're gonna
be official Macho Men. - What happens
if your dad notices it's a robot and not you? - Why does everyone keep
poking holes in my plan? Let's check Lisa's robot cam. <i> - How about you, Linc?</i> <i> How's that burger
treating you?</i> <i> [suspenseful music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> <i> - [robotic voice] The modern
hamburger was a result</i> <i> of the emergence
of the working class</i> <i> and the demand
for mass-produced,</i> <i> affordable food.</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> - Oh, no. - [whispering] What's going on? - Sometimes the artificial
intelligence mode overrides conversational tones. <i> [tense music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> - Wow, Linc, you've really been
boning up on your meat trivia, huh? Good job, buddy. [sighs] - Yeah. - Lincoln. - It worked! - I never had any doubts. - [exhales] - T-minus 10 minutes
till the midnight marathon. I think I just felt
a chest hair come in. How you doing? - [sighs] I've never
felt like more of a man. [timer dings] My lemon bars are ready. all: ♪ Happy half birthday
to you ♪ - ♪ You ♪ You're welcome. - Here we go. [inhales] <i> - Make sure not to verbalize
your wish, Father.</i> <i> It is considered taboo.</i> - You know what, buddy? I don't need to make a wish,
because tonight, all my wishes have come true. - Aww.
- [chuckles] - Diablo sauce?
- [screams] [water splashes]
[electrical buzzing] <i> - Parfaits--
the modern hamburger--happy--</i> <i> [voice deepens] Meat trivia.</i> [all scream] - Oh! - Fire! <i> - Fire. Ow.</i> <i> Pain. I'm melting.</i> <i> [dramatic music]</i> <i> [mechanical chirps]</i> - What is going on here? - That's not Lincoln, Dad. - It's Todd. I programmed him
to have Lincoln's voice. - What? Well, why? <i> - Ahh! All you hardcore fans,</i> <i> enter the promo code
"MACHOMAN" right now.</i> <i> You'll receive your Macho Man
badges in three to five</i> <i> business days, three to five!</i> - I'm gonna enter
the promo code. - On it.<i>
- It's now or never</i> <i> for your Macho Man dreams
to come true!</i> <i> - Lincoln wanted
to stay up to watch</i> <i> the midnight marathon
so that he</i> <i> could get his Macho Man badge.</i> - He asked us to take you out
for your half birthday. - So you wouldn't
make him go to bed. - So the only reason
you're all here is to help Lincoln
with his scheme. <i> [light tense music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> - Yeah. - Well, don't I feel
like a fool. - Why aren't you filling
in your Macho Man code? <i> - Last chance
to enter the code</i> <i> and get your Macho Man badge!</i> - You know, when I was a kid,
there was this really popular guy named Jake Strong. And we had the exact
same birthday. <i> And every year,
all the neighborhood</i> kids would go to Jake's party,
and no one would come to mine. And my mom, she tried to entice
the kids to come to the party. One year, we even had
a miniature pony. But it didn't work. - Nobody came? - No. That pony bucked me off
and ran straight to Jake's. I think he was attracted
to all the music and laughter. Anyway, my mom had
this amazing idea. And she decided that instead
of trying to compete with Jake, we'd start celebrating
my half birthday. And it worked. All the kids came. And you know,
I just was never happier. <i> [sentimental music]</i> And I always dreamed
that you guys would throw me a half birthday party, but I guess some things
are too good to be true. <i> - 10, 9--</i> - Lincoln, 10 seconds
or you won't get your badge. <i> - 6, 5, 4--</i> - You know what, Clyde? I don't feel like
a Macho Man right now. <i> - [grunts] Get your badge.</i> - I guess I'll just call a cab
to take us home since I couldn't fix
Vanzilla either. - Oh, honey. - No. - I already called a cab. - [sighs] [mechanical whirring] <i> ♪ ♪</i> - Hey, Todd. [grunts] - I love cake. <i> [somber music]</i> <i> ♪ ♪</i> - Surprise! - Wait, wh-- what? all: Surprise? - It's your surprise
half birthday party. I had to get you
out of the house so we could decorate,
right, guys? - Yeah. [all speaking at once] - Wait, so that whole story
about Lincoln's plan? - It was all part of our
bigger plan, right, guys? - Yeah.
- Of course. [overlapping chatter] - Wait, you were all
in on this? - Yeah. - It's like you said, Dad. In the Loud House, it is
all for one and one for all. <i> [sentimental music]</i> - And... We have another
special surprise for you. - I wrote you
a half birthday song. - I don't think this
could get any better. - And I'm gonna kick
it with a little cowbell. - It just did. - My real birthday
was just a couple weeks ago, and nobody remembered.
[chuckles] [rock music playing] - You know what?
all: What? - ♪ Let's just rock
this thing ♪ [cheering]
- 1, 2, 3, 4! - ♪ You thought
we didn't listen ♪ all: ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ - ♪ Listen, you thought wrong ♪ all: ♪ Yeah ♪ - ♪ We've news for you, Dad ♪ ♪ You're not just great ♪ ♪ You're rad! ♪ ♪ Happy half birthday ♪ all: ♪ Happy half birthday ♪ - ♪ Happy half birthday to
the best dad in the world ♪ ♪ Happy half birthday
from your house full of girls ♪ both: ♪ And boys ♪ - ♪ Ooh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ Ooh, oh, oh ♪ all: ♪ Happy half birthday ♪ ♪ Happy, happy, yeah ♪ - ♪ Big fun is our goal ♪ all: ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ - ♪ That's just how we roll ♪ all: Hey! - ♪ We hope you like
this song ♪ all: ♪ And so you know, you're
way cooler than Jake Strong ♪ ♪ Happy half birthday! ♪ - Yeah! - Love you, Dad!
- Love you, Dad! - Thank you! That was--that was perfect. Where are Leni and Lana? - What would a half birthday
be without a big present? <i> [bright orchestral music]</i> - Please be a pony.
Please be a pony. Please be a pony. [gasps]
Vanzilla, you're beautiful. - She's purring like a kitten. <i> ♪ ♪</i> - Vanzilla! - And I combined all my ribbons
from my ribbon collection to make that pretty bow. <i> ♪ ♪</i> - Aww. This is the greatest
night of my life. And I am the luckiest dad
in the world because I have
the best kids ever. Wait. Linc, what about
your midnight marathon and your Macho Man badge? - I don't need a badge
from Rip Hardcore to prove that I'm a man,
because a real man is a guy who loves
his family and always does the right thing. <i> ♪ ♪</i> [rock music playing] ♪ ♪ all: Yeah! ♪ ♪ [mechanical whirring] <i> - It seems there really is
no stronger bond than family.</i> ♪ ♪ <i> [rock music playing]
- You know what?</i> <i> - What?
- Let's just rock this thing!</i> <i> [cheering]</i> <i> all: 1, 2, 3, 4!</i> <i> - ♪ You thought
we didn't listen ♪</i> all: ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ <i> - ♪ Listen,
you thought wrong ♪</i> <i> all: ♪ Yeah ♪</i> <i> - ♪ We've got news for you,
Dad ♪</i> <i> ♪ You're not just great ♪</i> <i> ♪ You're rad! ♪</i> <i> all: Happy half birthday!</i> <i> Yeah!</i> <i> [Nickelodeon theme]</i>
