*Highfive* Bob: Aw, geeze. Jack: Did it just fuck up on you again? Bob: Yeah, why is it like this? Bob: What is this shit? Bob: Everythin- Portal has stopped working? Jack: Tha ha ha ha ha ha. Bob: *Sigh* Okay. Jack: Y'all ready to have some FUN!? Hehe. Bob: I'm in such a good mood right now, let's have so much fun. *Jack laughing over Bob* Bob: Let's have all the fun! Jack: Yeah! Jack: Your partner has disconnected. Hehe. Jack: WELP! Punch like button, face! Jack: Next video! Bob: Oh. Jack: Oh. Bob: Hi.
Jack: Hi. Hehehe. *Bob starts laughing*
Jack: Okay, sign of good faith. Jack: Bring it in, little buddy! *Hugs his taller friend* Jack: Hehe. Jack: What level were we on? Jack: Yeah, that sounds about right. Jack: Shut up, GLaDOS! Nobody cares. Bob: Shut up, Batch. Jack: Watch, look. I figured this out already. Bob: What's this do?
Jack: Watch. Jack: See-
Bob: Oh, shit snacks.
Jack: See? I figured it out. Bob: Thanks buddy!
Jack: Wait, do it again, do it again! Go! Jack & Bob: *Mind blowing sound effects of... Something?* Jack: Oh. Too high.
Bob: Isn't it-
Jack: Too high. Bob: Don't you...
Jack: Too high. Bob: Isn't, that...? Bob: That thing, something about something?
Jack: Yeah. And you need to put one over. *Slight laughter* Jack: You have to put one there. Bob: Here?
Jack: And we have to go in at the same time. Jack: You have to go in this one-
Bob: Ohh. I get it.
Jack: And I have to go in this one. Jack: Three! Bob: Pardon?
Jack: Three! Two! Bob: Pardon?
Jack: Three! Two! One! Jack: Geronimo!~
Bob: Wheeee!~ Jack: Pfftp. Jack: We did it! Bob: Hey! We're geniuses! Jack: What would of happened if that- Bob: You know what that deserves? Jack: There was a timer on that, what would of happened if-
Bob: Victory dance. Jack: Oh no. Jack: I think it deserves Rock-Paper-Scissors. *Bob being flooded out by Jack's voice in the background* Jack: Het, het, het.
Bob: Wolt.
Jack: YES! Jack: Oh, you are SO getting crushed. Jack: Oh you are SO getting crushed! Bob: What do I need to do with this? Jack: Please crush him. Jack: Please crush *Starts laughing (Psychopath...)* him.
Bob: No, I'm good. Bob: Oh, I see it coming here. *Jack erupts into laughter.* Bob: W- *Mic glitch* Jack: Aww man! Bob: No, that's fine. This is- Jack: Oh! I get it, I get it, I get it. Jack: I get it. Bob: Oh really? Jack: Yep! Jack: Go buddy! Bob: What am I doing here?
Jack: I don't know... Jack: I'm going to get crushed if you're not fast enough! Bob: I don't- There's nothing for me to do here. Jack: Okay, *Starts laughing a bit* come back down. Bob: Uwa- I don't understand what I'm supposed to do there! Jack: Wait, is there- Misze- there might be something at the Bob: I have an idea! I have an idea, I have an idea. Bob: No I don't. Bob: Yes I do! Bob: No I don't. Jack: That's what I was going to say, but maybe there's something at the end of all of these spikes that we need. Jack: Oh wait, no. Jack: 'cause you can't get there in time.
Bob: I don't think you can get down there. Jack: Hmmmmmm. *Click* Jack: Well if, fucking, real logic would work.
Bob: Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh. Jack: We'd just be able to go down the back. Jack: But no.~ Jack: We have to be some dumbass robots. Bob: I have a thought, I have a thought! Okay. Bob: Once these- You do the laser thing again once this stuff is all ready and I'm going to do this. Jack: Will that actually make you fly? Bob: Well, it might give me some launchy-thing on the wall, won't it? Jack: Ahh! Ahh! I'm burning myself! Fuck!
Bob: Maybe. Bob: D-don't kill... Bob: Just, just..
Jack: Go friend! Bob: Alright... Maximum height achieved... Jack: Maximum effort!
Bob: I think. Bob: Oh snap! Who's a genius? The people making captions, Bob. Jack: What happened? Jack: Oh, hey! Bob: I fixed it. Jack: Hi!
Bob: Hi.
Jack: You did it! Hahe... Bob: I'm a genius.
Jack: Yeeeaaah! Jack: *Mocking the robot laugh* Bob: See, I'm-
Jack: RRAAAAAGGHHH *Hits wall* Pfftfh.
Bob: I'm, there. Oh god! Jack: Hey, I pushed the button. Bob: Wow! You did that one by yourself. Ooh, I see.
Jack: You hit it, and I'll go through. Jack: I trust in me. Bob: This... This seems fine. Jack: Yeah! Jack: Oh wait, we need both of us.
Bob: Oh, okay. Jack: Well.
Bob: How? Jack: Time to hit the old, dusty, trail.
Bob: I know what to do. I know... I know what to do. Jack: Do you?
Bob: Nope, you can't go anywhere. You're trapped in there, you motherfucker. Jack: No ho ho! Jack: Come ba- Uh. Hello!? Bob: *Laughing*
Jack: There's no one to play Rock-Paper-Scissors with! Jack: Aw, that's sad!
Bob: I got it, I got it. I got.... Bob: This is fine.
Jack: OOoooooOOoOoOoaaaaAaaAahhhhhh... Jack: Not just a hat rack! Jack: Faster. Jack: Faster. *Laughs at Bob's failure*
Bob: FUUCK! Bob: I~ got it. Jack: There you go, now...
Bob: Ready for this shit? Jack: RUN!!! RUN BOB!!!
Bob: Wheeeeee! Jack: It didn't... It's right behind you! *Laughing at Bob's failure* Bob: God dang it. *Jack's insane laugh drowning Bob's voice out.* Jack: It didn't even land on the thing. Bob: Oh christ, okay. Jack: Hey, it's open! No. It's not. Bob: Why did I get stuck solving this bullshit by myself?
Jack: Alright... Go! Bob: Bye!
Jack: Go! Go! Go! Jack: It did it! It did it!
Bob & Jack: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay~! Bob: I am smarter than both of us!
Jack: Yes!
Bob: Or something like that. Jack: I don't mind being the dumb one. Jack: I'll just sit here and be happy.
Bob: Yes. Jack: Happy knowing that I'm a cute little blue boy. Bob: I- It's a- Jack: Well, green. :/ Bob: *Monotone* Booper Dooper™. Your partner in science. Jack: Hahahe. That- Bob: That- Let's trademark that, it's awesome. Jack: The thing that NOBODY ever wants to hear.
*Bob starts laughing*
Jack: Your partner in science... BOOPER DOOPER™! Bob: Uhhhh.
Jack: Okay, so a portal has to go there and maybe somewhere else... Jack: We need a block! Bob: Yes, yes we do. Bob: How do I hit that button? Jack: Kay, the blocks are going through this... Thing. Bob: Wait, I have an idea. Bob: No, I don't. Bob: No, I don't. Yes, I do. Jack: Oh, wait, I can go downstairs!
Bob: No, I don't. Yes, I do. Bob: No, I don't. Yes, I do. Yes, yes, I do. Bob: I got it, I got it, I got it. Jack: Going down the stairs, going down the stairs. Music: jacksepticeye - The Stairs Bob: I got this. Don't worry, I got this.
Jack: Goodbye, Bob. Goodbye, Bob. Jack: Going down the stairs. Goodbye, Bob. Goodbye, Bob. Bob: Can you, can you come help me time this out?
Jack: Going down the stairs... Jack: Ooh. *Click* Jack: I have to go all the way- Oh, wait. No I don't I just go, whooo Jack: Hi! Hehehe.
Bob: Help- Jack: What? Why would you-
Bob: First try!?
Jack: Why would you go on that one and not the other one? Bob: Whoa. Shit.
Jack: You have to go on the other side! Bob: What do you mean on the other side?
Jack: You have to go on the right one!
Bob: No, they don't go, they don't shoot up unless I hit the button. Bob: You have to hit the button to make one shoot up and then you need to shoot out of the other side to catch it in the air. Jack: *Click* Ooh. Bob: For serious.
Jack: How'd you hit the button!?
Bob: So all- Bob: Through my portals I will hit the button, and through your portals you will catch it in the air.
Jack: Ooooohhh. Okay
Bob: I go- Bob: I go first, and you go some time after me. So I'll go right now.
Jack: Okay, okay. Geronimo. And I will go now.
*Air whooshing past Atlas* Bob: Button. Bob: Ah, I think it messed up.
Jack: Nothing. Haha.
Bob: I think it was too late. Jack: Okay!
Bob: So I need to go sooner, how do you get back here? Jack: I just do this. Aww, shit. I hit the wrong one. Jack: I shou-
Bob: Go through mine. My portal is fine.
Jack: Oh yea, yea, yea. Jack: It's amazing how dumb we are! Hehe. Jack: Okay, go Bob. I believe in you, my partner in science, BobbyBoy! Bob: Alright, going right now. Bob: D- Uh... This should work. Jack: And then...
*A button is heard being pressed*
Jack: I go! Jack: HEU!!! Bob: Get that, bitch!
Bob & Jack: Yes! Jack: Oh, hook, line, and...
Bob: Oh my god. Jack: What's the end of that? (Hook, line, and sinker.) Bob: Sunket?
Jack: Sunk. Hook line and hooker? (Sinker. Hook, line, and sinker.) Bob: Hook line and drinker. (There are times when it's like you can't even hear me.) Jack: Oh wait, if I just do this. *Fan starts slowing down* Bob: What does that do? Jack: I...
Bob: It turns the fan on. Jack: The fan was already on!
Bob: No, it stops the fan. (I'm really sorry for those playing the drinking game.)
Jack: Does it?
Bob: I got an idea, I got an idea! Bob: Maybe. Jack: It does stop the fan. Jack: Ooooh. I broke it! Jack: That just shines up there, it's up there. *Laughs*
Bob: God damn it. Jack: W-we need to come out through that? Bob: I guess you need to launch yourself over there? Bob: Is there a point- Oh!
Jack: HAAAAAAAAAA, YES! Bob: Should I go?
Jack: I did not think that I would have enough speed to do that. Bob: Wow!
Jack: But-
Bob: Alright. Bob: What's over there? Jack: Uhh.
Bob: *Laughing* Hey! Heh. Jack: There's like, wait. There's a port- Er, there's a thing that I can go through that gets rid of my portals and now I'm in a room. *Game's notification sound* Jack: "Tab for partner view". Jack: Alright, there's a fan shutdown in here as well. Bob: Ooh, do I need to Portal you some lasers? Jack: So, I need-
Bob: Ooh, do I need to Portal you some lasers? Bob: Ooh, do I need to Portal you some lasers? Jack: Uhhhh. Possibly. Bob: I can shoot a laser right there. Bob: Where does this laser go? Jack: AH! Jesus christ, ow! Ha.
Bob: *Laughing* Sorry!
Jack: Fuckin' hell.
Bob: What happens if I do this? Jack: Okay, yeah. Wait, go-g-go now. Do... Jack: Yeah, that was shutting down the fan. Bob: Oh, so it's just off now. Jack: Oh!
Bob: Okay. Jack: So you do your portal thing and fly over to me.
Bob: That was easy.
Jack: I wanna see. I wanna wait for Bob. Bob: Ready?
Jack: Yeah. Bob: *Making amazing flying sound effects*
Jack: Come to me, friend! Jack: Aand...
Bob: Touching down... Jack: Oh, you went all the way through! I hit the fan blade. Bob: I didn't hit the fan like a scrublord. Jack: I'm not a scrublord, you're a bitch.
Bob: Like a huge scrublord!
Jack: Okay, three two one. Go! Bob: Oh, I was gonna... Okay... Jack: Okay. Jack: Fine. Bob: See? Use the game's-
Jack: We'll play how the game wants us to. Bob: You gotta use the game's features, man. Jack: Yeah, that's if you don't have friends and you're playing with some fucking weird rando. Jack: Rando named Randy. Bob: Why are you assuming Rando's weird? Bob: What's up, Randy the rando? Jack: We need a dick. Bob: I got a dick. Bob: Oh, was it really sitting right in front of the thing? Jack: No, the thing's here. Bob: Where do I put it in? OK. Jack: There. Bob: Oh, there? Jack: Do not up Jack: Do not upload V-237 schematics. Jack: Seriously? Jack: What? Jack: Shoot- Ah, fucking hell! Dude, we're doing it! That's the end of Chapter 2, then. Put a- Close over that chapter. It's- It's closed, like a book. Jack: Part three... Come on up, friend! Bob: Hello. Jack: Nuuueeep. Bob: I did it!
Jack: Aw shit! I thought I could stop you and you'd fall. *Laughing* Bob: You can't stop me, I'm going right here.
Jack: No.
Bob: And I'm going over here.
Jack: No. Bob: And I'm going over here, and there.
Jack: No. Noo.~ Jack: No. Get in- Get in there. Jack: Get in that, right there. Jack: Blue commands thee.
Bob: You get in yours. Jack: I'm a-ah-a-hey wait. Three two one, go. I did it. Bob: Ooh. I see a light bridge. Bob: Yeah, shoot that up there.
Jack: Me too. Jack: This'd be so confusing if you didn't actually play... Jack: The base game. Jack: Stand over where I am. Jack: And then.
Bob: Here?
Jack: Spladaow.
Bob: Are we going to die?
*Water splash* Jack: Wrong one.
*Bob & Jack being laughing like idiots.* Jack: I got it! I got it!
Bob: It's so bad that I listened to you.
Jack: I got it, I got it! Jack: Wait. I should always-
Bob: "Are we going to die?" Jack: I should always fire, my other one. Jack: I should always fire my left one. Bob: You could just look. It's pretty clear.
Jack: SHUT UP! Jack: It is, but I don't care. Jack: HEUH! Bob: AW D- *Slashes into water* Jack: How did you die? Bob: Hello.
Jack: Hi. Bob: I got it.
Jack: Oh yeah, you can portal there and there. Jack: And then we walk back over here.
Bob: Woooo.
Jack: Lead on. (Quick Jack! Jump on the platform and remove your portal!) Jack: Ooooh. The temptation to somehow push you in. Is too strong! Jack: Oh, did you try to dick me over?
Bob: Oh, I thought it- I thought it was going to cut you off.
*Bob & Jack are both laughing again.*
Jack: You dick. Jack: You're on the wrong side! You're orange! Bob: Oh. Jack: You're supposed to be on that one. Bob: This one?
Jack: No, that one. Bob: This one?
*Jack sighs* Jack: I'm dancing! GLaDOS: Are you broken?
Bob: Hi. Jack: I'm not broken, fuck you GLaDOS! Jack: Ha WOOSH! Jack: Ooh. That goes up.
Bob: Well that's not what's going to happen! *Bob laughs at Jack's failure*
Jack: Okay, I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. Bob: How?
Jack: Oooh. Yeah. Whaa~aat the fuck. Jack: Okay, okay okay.
Bob: Interesting.
Jack: Okay. Jack: Okay, if you can put a portal up there. Jack: Oh wait, yeah. We can't get up there. Bob: Oh, I got an idea. Move yours up a little bit. Jack: This one? *Awkward silence* (How was the game last week?) Jack: But how? Bob: Aaa-wow-wow-wow-wow. Wait. Wait wait, wait. Wait, I have an idea.
Jack: But we can't fire through that! Bob: Jump- jump yourself. Jack: Ooooooh. Bob: Oh shit! Your portals went away. Alright, hang on, hang on, hang on.
Jack: Wooo! I'm just going to stay jumping! Jack: WOOO! Bob: There you go.
Jack: Fucking, NOICE dude. (Le Michael Rosen NOICE.) Jack: NOICE with a capital NOY.
Bob: Now what, now what do we do? Bob: Now what's going up on there? You want me to get rid of mine? Jack: Uuuuh. Yes. Jack: *Click* Jack: That didn't do anything. I need you to get rid of your red one. Jack: *Click* That also didn't do anything.
Bob: Like that?
Jack: There we go. Jack: YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAYY! Jack: Cube, block! Bob: Oh, there's a button.
Jack: There's a ball. Bob: Where'd it go?
Jack: Oh. I-e-i-I need it. Jack: But, how? Jack: When you get the ball, it needs to go over there. Jack: It goes in that thing.
Bob: Where? Jack: Over there.
Bob: Over there, you say? Bob: Wait, wait, wait, Bob: Wait, wait, wait, I got it, I got it, Bob: Wait, wait, wait, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, Bob: Wait, wait, wait, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, Bob: Wait, wait, wait, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, Bob: Wait, wait, wait, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it Bob: Wait, wait, wait, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it. I got it. [Song: "I'm Everywhere"- Teknoaxe]
