Everything Wrong With The Lorax In 12 Minutes Or Less

[Music] forty-three seconds of logos also illumination I am The Lorax I speak for the trees stalk if you must on that stage on our screen but narrations narration whether seen or unseen so does all the shrubbery have an air delivery guy sensor if they're plastic why wouldn't they just be up all the time sings position [Music] okay your towns polluted why do you sound so happy about it also who's this player bowtie girl on each arm can you have his own movie can we call him the toy slur funny immature but exactly why is this one need Ian frozen did the giant white overalls cut off the circulation to his nether region oh hi Ted Ted might have the creepiest stalker tactic in the history of film this is a children's film I remind you considering this building is taller than the surrounding houses Ted should have been able to see this from the front of Audrey's house those are trees real ones how does she know this and even if she does she admits she's never seen one so how is she able to paint them with this much detailed accuracy had me smelled like butterfly milk Wow what does that even mean horny Ted would be excellent at cinemasins a guy somehow got you one well I probably marry him on the spot I bet that sounds crazy is that so crazy not to future serial stalker possible killer Ted I get this is supposed to be funny but from a marketing standpoint it makes zero sense why this company would put a disco setting in their product over say top 40s pop setting my disco also how does the tree make the lights go off inside the house if you're going to leave this button unsecured and easy to activate why install a stair mechanism in the first place just build stairs or I don't know a door at ground level having the first stair located chest level directly under the activation button is not only the most dangerous option but also to I off the ground to be easily accessed the more smog in the sky the more people will buy if O'Hare is just coming to this realization I'm having a hard time figuring out how he made his zillions why is he leaving town no one ever leaves then maybe you should make it a little harder for the people to get out maybe you have a passcode or handprint sensor instead of just a big button to open the door if the air this close is so bad how does it not impact neat Vil I didn't see any kind of dome what separates the good air from the bat how did he even find this place was there only one road that led directly here I don't know about trees what happened wasn't keeping him on the hook up by the window have been easier for carrying on a conversation how could Ted even hear him from down on the ground I was a young man narrated story within a narrated story welcome to near ception if somehow your invention ends up a failure instead of a success oh it wouldn't surprise me at all mom Chloe the magical self amplified electric guitar is magical what kind of bad compression are they using down in the marshmallow factory to make this marshmallow money shot happen oh yes right after the musical number about the kid who kept interrupting the story and was never heard from again he just threatened Ted with murder is this setting up a horror sequel maybe a collaboration between Seuss and Stephen King can we call it needful things see once-ler apparently has the strength of 10 men in that skinny hipster body little did I know that by jumping down that tree I had just summoned a mystical creature as old as time itself known as the beat you over the head with an environmental message creature where did Ted's insta house come from his cart seems like more material than he would have had but fine let's say it was in his cart how did he build it so fast and all by himself so you're telling me you just didn't see me magically appear out of that stump with all the lightning and thunder and stuff see any of that The Lorax has a good point even if Ted didn't see him pop out of the trunk he had to notice the lightning and thunder along with the dark clouds that randomly appeared and disappeared if you want to hear more come back tomorrow there is literally no reason for Sir once-ler lot to delay finishing this TED talk other than the movie wants to movie a little bit more before he finishes I know this is a dream sequence and everything but how did she blow out the candles on the other side of that cake wow that's some expert level daydreaming right there you're so into it you're forgetting you're holding a box of cereal with mom and grandma at the table I'm not sure how this Susie and Scrabble works with no points listed on the tiles and a playing board that's way too small but I do know that gramma so just completely vanished into thin air okay it was already obvious that neat Ville has no building safety standards but these skinny stairs without a guardrail just gave me secondhand vertigo and not the good Jimmy Stewart kind so all O'Hare did was tell Ted he shouldn't leave the town again he didn't think to post guards at the exit door or anything that would be useful in deterring the situation not sure why Ted is surprised here this is exactly what happened the last time he rang the doorbell why don't you like other kids breakdancing him wearing bell-bottoms and playing the Donkey Kong stalky Kong does this mean this is in our universe and not a fantasy world I've been forgiving a lot of silliness thinking this some other fantasy world but if you know Donkey Kong you should also understand aerodynamic vehicles fish not being able to breathe or sing out of water and trees having leaves and not cotton candy here's 10 retroactive sins for all those times I like your nonsense go how nice to see someone so undeterred by things like reality oh there pot I mean kettle maybe go Lim thinkin he can find a tree for his crush but speaking of reality how do you even live here there's no vegetation no source of clean water your entire existence is undeterred by things like reality Firefly fish food falsely fashions fake fish light flashlights let's look past the fact that the once-ler had some kind of portable house in the back of his carriage how does he have electricity who taught you guys how to steal a bag who taught them what a bed was Mission Impossible theme during a secret job cliche also fishing impossible these bar-ba-loots going all Fisher friends not food certainly makes sense in a kids movie but we all know that these discount Bears would have devoured every one of these harmonious halibuts in the real world right I know there's some wood on that bed frame but I'm still guessing the iron frame and overall weight make this buoyant bedtime business a bust now you're concerned for his life if baby bar balut hadn't been on that bed he probably would have just gone chasing waterfalls without you and died anyway the second you send a sleeping man down a river you should have already made your peace with him sleeping where the humming fishes huh the once-ler is suddenly dry even though he was submerged in the river less than a minute ago no a movie you do not have my permission to continue to use these creepy fin legged chipmunk sounding human tooth having fish is a constant sound effects machine enough is enough apparently this fridge is powered by the same magic electricity as Ted's guitar but FFL but wait there's more thanks to its all-natural microfibers the feed is super absorbent it also works that so it's a towel then you could have just said it's a towel tomatoes are not water balloons so let's say the knee did take off in popularity how exactly did this town have Improv Everywhere wannabes find Ted in the middle of the forest [Music] actually no but I think he's gonna get to that part really soon yes that's right he got sent home it's story again just so the movie could remind us how battle here is how cute the girlfriend is and how cool his grandma is we get it Columbo is reading The Wonder Years Kato book just get back to Wesley and Buttercup already oh you know me just Cruise and putting out the vibe the creepy vibe this works go whoa Britt's actually got a superhuman arm if need bill had a pro team he could lead them to the AFC Championship so they could blow a lead to the Patriots why did the once-ler think inviting his super annoying and unsupportive family on here would help this RV breaks the first law of thermodynamics so bad it makes Ted's house from a cart seem almost plausible also wow is there laundry that already needs drying this isn't some rinky-dink operation anymore I got plans big plans because one person warrior invention is a hat a tree falls the way it leans be careful which way you lean yeah well a strong carries liquid the way you suck so be careful how hard you suck see we can do it too well what else can we do we could always start chopping down the trees but wouldn't harvesting the Tufts be the better action in the long run if the trees cut down it can't grow any more this is bad is about as deep as this movie wants to go and exploring its environmental message maybe I'm expecting too much from a kids movie but even the dr. Seuss book it was based on is more nuance than this and it even had to rhyme and everything this may be the worst song I've ever heard one of these kid flicks seriously this makes VeggieTales feel like Handel's Messiah in comparison what an absolute piece of Barbra Lutz cat the animal that doesn't want self someone else's so this is essentially the circle of life made simpler one could say the Lorax is just The Lion King for dummies this could just as easily be the slogan for illumination studios oh come on newbie there's no way this character got this greedy and this evil this quick screw you a movie right and you're smooth you know that strange secret hole in your groovy loose club the very last one that may stop you you know my problem with the story is that he isn't so much undone by his greed he's actually undone by his complete ignorance of basic botany I wonder so younger O'Hara looks exactly like O'Hara except with braces our bracelets now shorthand for doom Butte sold over 52 million of these things and he should have made some profits the last truffula seed you need to plant it Ted you have a seed this whole time where did you get it why couldn't you use it why on Zeus is green Gribble grass did you not try and plant it when you were in full megalomaniac mode why is he just disabling this surveillance catnap he's been to see the once-ler three times now come to think of it as big a deal as this movie made over O'Hara's voyeuristic tendencies how did he sneak out so easily twice more after being warned setting aside that this destroyed camera somehow still has power if I'm reading this boot-up string right that looks like he's trying to reboot and keeps getting errors and therefore should not be functioning near enough to grab this information the scene had a few drops of water spilled on it and seconds later is already sprouting even beyond the premature tree germination how would a tree that reproduces this quickly even be in danger of extinction I'm sure just go sue here is happy the decoy worked but has she forgotten she's close to toppling off this ledge exit vehicle first laughs later you know when your life is no longer at risk safe to guess the Ted's mom with the opposite direction is these three to lead this truck away as a decoy so how exactly are they now crossing paths and if Ted's mom didn't go the opposite direction just consider this a sin for her stupidity Wow geez granny you just bone owed that dude have a little compassion nice to see they let Zack Snyder director seen we don't why you're really against trees because they produce fresh air it's called photosynthesis how does she know this who taught her about photosynthesis in a world without trees but exactly how I'm having a hard time grasping the geography here aren't we just in the town centre and did he have to drive up a huge hill to hit the wall also how is he even knocking down the wall here when he left need bill the first time it didn't look like the sign had any road below it also he drove around inside the wall it's Hollow and at least 30 feet wide he may punch a hole but he ain't taking it down also also that is either and muddy strong bulldozer or that is one weak-ass wall my guess is that O'Hare built the wall but had the Barbra Lutz pay for it you get out there right now and get these people on my side or else you're fired everyone clearly would hurt that so not sure how hair is helping us cause you can't breathe blood you don't so is it just me or did someone forget to make these guys why are their lips moving but I'm still just hearing TED news mom Thank You Ted does that mustache give the once-ler super sight how does he have any idea what's happening from this distance this might have gotten fixed a whole lot sooner if the Lorax hadn't left a one-word obscure clue also end of movie reading your feature-length film barely reached minute 80 with nothing substantial important or weighty it's so short you exclaim should we add something more dear god no says the crowd let us head to the door yet you added the end screen and crush all our wishes with 20 full seconds of these damn dancing fishes that's not right [Music] those are trees real ones they're real they're spectacular [Music] for shame shame and some flapjacks too early for flapjacks I'll take care if I had a dick this is where I'd tell you the suck

Channel: CinemaSins

Views: 6,131,687

Rating: 4.8660569 out of 5

Keywords: the lorax, lorax, illumination, seuss, suess, cinemasins, cinema sins, everything wrong with, eww, movie, mistakes, review

Id: R5BHSurBfgc

Length: 12min 47sec (767 seconds)

Published: Thu Feb 01 2018

Reddit Comments

[u/Castriff]

I actually think "How Bad Can I Be" is the best song in this movie, and the opening song is the worst song of all time. Just my opinion. And hey, what's wrong with Veggietales? Some of those are classics.

[u/MT_Original]

“Firefly Fish Food Falsely Fashions Fake Fishlight Flashlight”

Are they intentionally giving Jeremy near impossible tongue twisters now?

[u/ROBOT_B9]

Huh, I thought you were going to wait later this year when Illumination releases their terrible looking Grinch movie to do this one.

Also, add 100 sins for using an ecological character to advertise SUVs.

[u/Evil_Spike]

This movie exists ding

[u/Baduel77mao]

Another 100 sins for having an ecological message yet throwing garbage to the screen every year

[u/Godzilla-2000]

“Die let it die. Let it shrivel up and- C’mon, who’s with me, eh?”

My favorite part of the movie.

[u/symmec1ept]

Taylor Swift ding!