>> James: HI! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING
HERE! THANK YOU FOR COMING TO SEE US! NOW, YOU HAVE A LOT IN COMMON
YOU TWO. YOU ARE BOTH FROM THE SOUTH. YOU ARE SOUTHERNERS. >> WE ARE. >> James: WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE
EXPRESSIONS? FROM THAT PART OF THE WORLD? I'VE NEVER BEEN. >> CAN I HAVE SOME MORE ALCOHOL. >> James: REALLY. WOW. >> YEAH. >> James: SOUNDS JUST LIKE
LONDON. >> YEAH. WHAT DO YOU MEAN EXPRESSIONS? >> MY GRANDFATHER ONCE DESCRIBED
MY HIGH SCHOOL GIRLFRIEND AS BEING AS CUTE AS A SPECKLED PUP
UNDER A STUDEBAKER. >> James: THAT'S THE STUFF I'M
TALK ABOUT. I MET SOMEONE FROM THE SOUTH. SHE SPOKE TO ME AND SAID, I WAS
TRYING TO PARK IN A SPACE, AND I COULDN'T GET IN AND SHE SAID,
OH, DARLING, BLESS YOUR HEART. AND I THOUGHT, THAT'S THE NICEST
EXPRESSION YOU COULD HAVE TO WALK AROUND --
>> IT'S NOT. AN INSULT. >> James: REALLY? WHAT WAS SHE SAYING? >> LIKE YOU POOR STUPID PERSON. >> James: OH. LIKE "BLESS YOUR HEART" IS
LIKE, OH -- YOU KNOW, LIKE THAT. >> IT GETS YOU OUT OF ANYTHING. YOU COULD SAY, SHE'S A HORRIBLE
PERSON, BLESS HER HEART. >> James: I TOOK IT AS, OH, MY
GOD, SHE WANTS TO BLESS MY HEART. THIS IS BEAUTIFUL. >> NO, SHE DOES NOT. >> James: I WAS DOING
SOMETHING VERY STUPID AT THE TIME SO IT DOES MAKE SENSE. >> YEAH. >> James: WE HAVE TO
CONGRATULATE YOU ON YOUR BRILLIANT COMEDY SPECIAL
"RELATABLE," IT'S SO FANTASTIC. IT'S SO WONDERFUL. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
IT'S JUST GREAT NOW. NOW, TO PREPARE FOR YOUR FIRST
SPECIAL. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU DID
STANDUP? >> 15 YEARS AGO. >> James: 15 YEARS AGO. YEAH. >> James: YOU PERFORMED
SOME -- >> OH, OH, IT'S GOING TO BE --
OH, NOW WE DON'T KNOW HOW WE FEEL ABOUT IT. ( LAUGHTER )
>> James: YOU PERFORMED SECRET SHOWS AROUND LOS ANGELES. >> WE DID, YOU CAME TO A SECRET
SHOW. >> James: IT WAS ABSOLUTELY
FANTASTIC. HOW NERVOUS WERE YOU GOING BACK
TO IT? >> THAT MUCH. I WAS THAT NERVES, WHAT YOU JUST
DID. I WAS NERVOUS BECAUSE IT HAD
BEEN 15 YEARS AND I HADN'T WRITTEN IN A LONG TIME AND I
THOUGHT, WELL, FIRST OF ALL, WHAT AM I GOING TO SAY AND,
FIRST OF ALL, WHERE AM I GOING TO TRY IT OUT. I CHOSE LARGO. IT WAS A SMART AUDIENCE AND I
WANTED A SMART KIND OF SNOBBY AUDIENCE BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT
PEOPLE TO JUST GO, OH, IT'S ELLEN. I WANTED THEM TO JUDGE ME
PROPERLY. >> James: YOU WANT TO EARN THE
LAUGHS. >> EXACTLY. AND ALSO, LARGO, THEY REALLY
WATCH FOR CELL PHONES, SO I KNEW NOBODY WAS GOING TO GET PHI --
BECAUSE I HAD TO WORRY ABOUT MY STUFF GETTING OUT. I WENT TO LARGO'S ALL THE TIME. I LOVE IT. >> James: IN MY DEFENSE, I
DIDN'T KNOW YOU WEREN'T ALLOWED TO FILM STUFF. LIKE, I DIDN'T KNOW, SO I
DELETED IT STRAIGHTAWAY. ( LAUGHTER )
BUT I WAS PUTTING MYSELF IN IT, SO I -- YOU WERE ON STAGE, AND I
WAS DOING IT LIKE THIS. ( LAUGHTER )
YOU KNOW. >> YEAH, I SAW YOU DOING THAT. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT YOU WERE
DOING, BUT NOW I REALIZE. >> James: THAT'S IT. TALKING ABOUT PERFORMING LIFE. PATRICK, WE HAVE A VIDEO OF YOU
DOING SOMETHING THAT BLEW ME AWAY. >> I WANT TO BE BLOWN AWAY. >> James: TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. ( BAND PLAYING )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> IT'S A FUNDRAISER WE DO. >> James: HOW LONG HAS FREDDY
MERCURY BEEN IN YOUR REPERTOIRE? >> I'M A CLOSET FREDDY MERCURY
IMPERSONATOR. >> James: HOW ANNOYED WERE YOU
WHEN BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY CAME OUT? YOU MUST HAVE BEEN FURIOUS! ( LAUGHTER )
>> HOW GREAT WAS HE IN THAT MOVIE? HE WAS AWESOME. >> HE WAS AMAZING. ( APPLAUSE )
>> I'M GOING TO TAKE THAT APPLAUSE FOR ME. >> OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH. I'LL JUST TAKE ANY APPLAUSE. I LOVE SINGING THAT STUFF. I DO. I GET TO PERFORM WITH MY BROTHER
A COUPLE OF TIMES HERE. BOTH MY BROTHERS IS IN A BAND. ACTUALLY, ONE IS HERE TODAY. WHERE ARE YOU, MARK? THERE HE IS, ACTUALLY. >> James: SO YOU WERE IN A
BAND TOGETHER? >> YEAH, WE SING IN A BAND
TOGETHER. WE DO CHARITY BENEFITS. I LOVE MUSICALS, BUT I DON'T GET
TO DO THEM A LOT, SO I HAVE TO FIND OTHER VENUES TO SING, AND
THAT WAS THE PONT CLAIRE FILM FESTIVAL WHERE I JUST WANTED TO
DO FREDDY MERCURY. >> WOW, VERY IMPRESSIVE. >> James: THANK GOD YOU DID. AND IT'S BEAUTIFUL. >> THANK YOU. ( APPLAUSE )
>> James: ELLEN, IF YOU HAD TO BE ANY SUPERSTAR ON A STAGE, WHO
WOULD YOU BE? >> WELL, OBVIOUSLY, WILLIE
NELSON. >> James: OF COURSE. ( LAUGHTER )
>> OBVIOUSLY IS THE BEST PART OF IT. OBVIOUSLY. >> James: NOW, WHEN YOU'RE
GEARING UP TO DO A SPECIAL THAT'S GOING TO LIVE ONLINE
FOREVER, AND IT REALLY IS YOU AND A MICROPHONE, HOW DO YOU
CHOOSE WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO WEAR ON STAGE? >> WELL, YOU WEAR SOMETHING THAT
IS GOING TO BE TIMELESS THAT WILL HOLD UP THAT ALWAYS, ALWAYS
WILL LOOK GOOD. >> James: RIGHT. BECAUSE I'VE GOT A PHOTO OF THE
FIRST TIME YOU WERE ON JOHNNY CARSON. >> THAT'S RIGHT. YEP. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> James: HOW DID YOU DECIDE ON THIS LOOK? >> WELL, YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS SAY
THAT IT'S REALLY EMBARRASSING BECAUSE EVERYTHING WE DO IS, YOU
KNOW, ON FILM OR PHOTOGRAPHED AND IT'S OUT THERE FOREVER AND
EVER. BUT, AT THE TIME, THAT WAS THE
FASHION, BUT I CAN'T EVEN SAY THAT WAS EVER THE FASHION. ( LAUGHTER )
I DON'T KNOW. SIN BAD USED TO HELP ME PICK
CLOTHES OUT. ( LAUGHTER )
AND THAT -- I DON'T KNOW EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS. >> James: I MEAN, YOU LOOK
LIKE YOU ARE FLEEING A COUNTRY AND YOU'VE GRABBED THE CLOSEST
SHIRT, AND IT'S THE SHIRT YOU USE FOR ART. >> YEAH. I DON'T EVEN KNOW -- I MEAN,
I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THAT. WHY WOULD I -- AND IT'S NOT ME
AT ALL. THE PANTS, IT'S CUT OFF, BUT THE
PANTS WERE QUITE SOMETHING, TOO. IT REALLY WAS SIN BAD'S FAULT.
