Cyntoia Brown-Long Talks Meeting Her Husband While In Prison, Healing Post Release + More

Breakfast Club morning everybody is de j MV Angela ye Charlemagne the guy we are the breakfast club we got a special guest in the building yes Indies and Sawyer Brown welcome good morning how are you and when I say how are you I mean like how are you how is your emotional spirit your mental health how are you I'm good I feel really blessed you know this is all new coming to a new city traveling doing this but it's just a blessing I keep reminding myself you know what the opportunity is and you know I just look hard to do it what are you died are you tired of telling the story over and over cuz it seems like it's so much press it seems like it's a lot on you every time you have to relive it or you just ya know with it I mean it's a lot but you know there's a purpose in it and so that just I just continue to remind myself you know sometimes it's uncomfortable but you know I would rather help someone do what I have to say then then hold it back because it feels uncomfortable it was hard for me everything this book is you and quirk not being able to express yourself and tell your story you know just knowing that you have to rehearse these answers just give a yes or no answers and not explain how you got to where you got to that you ended up in court in a situation where you were being charged with murder yeah and so it's great to be able to read this and see all the events that led up to it because people look at a story like that they see you in court just like the jury might see you in court and say this woman killed someone and therefore equals she's a bad person without understanding the events that really transpired so let's talk about that a little bit now that's for people who might not be as familiar with the with the story of how everything happened yeah so I got involved with a juvenile justice system when I was 12 got locked up in state custody and I started running from facilities I started staying on the streets in Nashville was around older people older women older men late 20s but you know I was really stepping into that role of an adult but I wasn't an adult so I continued to get myself in situations that I was ready for I was in way over my head and wasn't really equipped to to navigate that world and so naturally if you're in a situation you don't know how to handle it you make a lot of bad decisions right I ended up with a man that at the time I believed was my boyfriend mm-hmm um but he wasn't and you were how old I was 16 years old at that time and so now I come to know that my experiences was it was sex trafficking mm-hmm you know but at that time I just felt like I was playing my role in a relationship mmm so a man he was 43 years old had picked me up for sex made me feel uncomfortable again in way over my head just wanted to leave didn't feel that I was safe to do so and I shot him and you know I was arrested and the detectives you know they talked to me like just let us know what happened was he trying to rape you did you feel uncomfortable did he threaten you like what was the deal and in my mind I'm thinking I was just defending myself right they'll understand that yeah and so he was like if you talk to us it'll be the difference between nine years and 99 years and I was like okay I'll talk to you today I did anything wrong and no lawyer no no lawyer no parent no no they did it at 16 well see I did say that I was 19 and then they figured out that I was 16 but even once they found out that I was 16 they didn't offer to call my parents they didn't offer any of that is that legal of course is not but that's what makes me feel like that it should have been dropped or that anybody should have been able to been used and we found that because another thing that they had said you know there's another thing in your Miranda rights if they offer you promises of leniency they can't do that correct and so of course they asked you that outside of the room where there's the camera so we sat at the table and he was saying you know the nine years versus ninety nine years and whenever we got into the room he said no promises have been made I was like hold up that what you said a second yes not what you said and even though that was on tape that I said it obviously it alludes to some kind of conversation where there were promises being made the judge still felt that the confession should still be allowed in well that it wasn't coerced you know we where did the botched robbery story come from they were trying to say it was a robber so because whenever I had left you know I took guns from his house I wasn't trying to go back to be with another man I just wanted to go back to the hotel and just rest we couldn't go back with with nothing no money you know you had a oh yeah yeah your boyfriend you know you thought yeah at that time I just thought I can't go back cuz that's gonna be pissed like we have to pay this pay for this hotel I'm the one that's making the money he's happy when I bring back money and items and so I have to do that or he's going to abuse me yeah talk about how you met him we had Tony Rivera here last week and she was talking about you know she was a victim of sex trafficking and she tries to save women and it's very scary the reason I say is scary is because you know I have three daughters Charlamagne has three do I have three oh yeah I do done yeah you have to forget you have five kids I think now I got to be doing this to the only person Woodall does but she was saying that his shopping season now and this is the time when men are actually looking for this young girl so what did you see in him that made you trust him and how did that happen I mean I think it can happen at any time it can happen to anyone um and it could have been anyone it could have been him or any other man there was something within me where I was constantly seeking acceptance I wanted to be desired and it was that desperation and like within the space of two weeks because of everything that I had learned leading up to that point that my whole self-image was based on how others to view me not men you know were attracted to me and like that's that's dangerous and like that puts you in a very vulnerable position a man doesn't have to hold a gun to your head to make you get out and do these things you feel that you'll do absolutely whatever it takes to make him happy because people will say oh well she didn't have to stay and this is what people who have never been in a situation like that I don't know anybody or don't know the story or aren't educated will say okay you know she chose to be there she wanted to be with him he didn't tell her that she had to stay she could have left she could have went back home yeah but what they don't understand is they're like you said a lot of things even in your childhood you talked about not feeling accepted not feeling like you fit in finding out that you were adopted you know I'm sure all of those things played a role and you just feeling like not worthy my right and I think a lot of people you know they they sit on the outside and they're looking in and number one you can't fight someone else's inter battles you know and you can't say like what it's like I used to be the person where it was like oh no ain't no man gonna ever put his hands on me like I would leave I would do this I wouldn't say but there's so much into it like psychologically and you know there's a real thing it's called a trauma bond you know that's what happens when you're in abusive situations and you're always thinking well I must have done something but it's gonna get better and I just need to do this and and it's okay this is normal we're just having problems this is just natural it's not but these are just the lies that you tell yourself they're the lies that you're told the lies that you take in from around you and it's just not the truth what was your childhood like prior to meeting that guy what was your household so at home like I had a good had a good home I had a mother mm-hmm so I was adopted my father he was in the military he was retired from the military started driving trucks a lot of discipline mm-hmm yeah a lot of dissing very strict like the stuff that I was out there doing I would not be doing that around Elenin period and you know that was one of the things where I kept running to situations where the things that I wanted to be involved with it was more permissive you know so he was too strict so you wanted to have a little bit more fun basically all right my mother yeah church every Sunday every Wednesday every time I get in trouble what's going on like trying to take me to counseling and I wasn't with that you know I want elegant though yeah you were in a special program yeah so I was in the program for academically superior students got kicked out because of my attitude went through that a lot in school so that's one of the things I talked about to like being outcast a lot of times in school they feel like it's just easier to remove you from the learning environment instead of trying to find out what is it that I can be doing to tailor this learning environment to you right what is this special needs that that you have and obviously I had some behavioral issues and instead of actually trying to figure that out trying to work with my mother who would come up to the school every time they called her up and think well what is it that I can be doing and click and I had no answer just just take her home she's suspended or we're gonna send her to alternative school so it's just easier for them to push me aside to get rid of me then actually invest the time trying to figure out what can we do to help like how can we help you to grow what you started acting out do you think it's because you knew you were adopted what means you start acting up yeah I think there was a seed that was planted whenever I found out I wrote about in the book you know how when I started school and you know kids it asks why are you like why are you not the same color as your parents and like that they're it's like this lens was put on me I kept saying my self is different from other people I didn't fit in I was outcast and you know after a while I just I stopped wanting to fit in I stopped caring because I found other people where like they didn't care like they didn't care if you were perfect they didn't care if you make it crazy and care if you fit in like do you just you want smoke this plant like that's it when you scare your dad don't worry just get him if he was so militant myself my dad was a cop and it was I didn't do a lot of things I was scared to go home or like 9:40 well you find out that's not your biological father you like my dad you know it I mean no he was my dad oh yeah it wasn't that um I mean it was strict I think everybody like you know they're kind of scared to get in a woman if you know you've done something I know sometimes I would try to place sleep and my pants would beat you into sleep they don't match yeah get on up so but I mean there was that normal element of it but yeah and they tried really hard like they didn't you know but I think what would you say about how the police handled the situation after afterward because it seems like once they found out that you were only 16 years old right and the situation that you had been in you know being abused knowing that there was a man that was a grown man that was contributing to this you think police have to be trained differently when they have to deal with women who clearly are victims of sex trafficking yeah what's interesting for me is that you know they actually had cut they questioned him they had all his information they interviewed him and he told on you until yeah and what was defending him oh no he wasn't he didn't do that you're lying you know of course cuz that's what he told me like I've ever tell you something like that it's a lie but yeah so like they never arrested him even after finding out after you know I testified at the transfer hearing about the truth about everything that happened they still they never arrested him but I mean it should have been enough the minute you found I was 16 and you found me naked in the room with this man like you threatened to shoot me because I was trying to get my clothes when you burst into the room the cops yeah yeah so like why was that a problem and then here he is fifteen years later the detective in my case and he comes to the hearing saying she was in traffic she wanted to do what she was doing and like that's the mindset that like you know we're up against like you don't understand like there's no such thing as a teenage prostitute period period when did that's a good point when cuz I'm wondering when you got caught up in the human trafficking ring when did you realize you were being taken advantage of and what was happening was wrong or did you not realize that to you was in jail I didn't realize that until I was well into my twenties well I was an adult you know and like all these things that we take in you know that there are girls who are just hot in the ass they're just fast and you know all these things that we take in as truths and it's just I mean it's so detrimental like you know like that's what I thought of myself I blame myself and I think in society there's a lot of the victim blaming that goes on and we take that in mm-hm and so I didn't think that I was a victim I didn't think that I was exploited I didn't think that I was taking advantage of people were telling me this and I was like no no it wasn't that you don't understand like I I knew what I was doing if you were got out you might have went right back to cut yeah oh yeah if I would've got out of melee I mean there was Tom said I was like in the juvenile detention climbin oh yes yes calling him crying for him like desperate to get back out to him when did you realize that that you were gonna have to sit in jail for a long time and you needed help when did that finally come together be like no this is not some short-term and Curt doesn't have my back when did that come to your mind so I remember there was a woman that worked in the detention center and it was for Keisha and you know she sat down with me they're still trying to talk to me which I had talked to them about everything that happened but they wanted me to testify about it in court and I was like I'm not doing that well I'm not doing I'm not talking about him like that and they were like listen this man doesn't care about you the way you think he does like he's already made a testimony against you I'm like that's not true you're lying like they actually showed me the police report yeah and I called him I was like let me call him and of course he said made me a lion they made that up and I believed him and it was it took for her to sit down and say like you're facing life you do understand that right what do you think he's out there doing he's still doing he's doing he's found somebody else like he's thinking about you know the cute some I said life I didn't think it was possible like you know the people I was around like you know I was around older people and it's always like when it comes to like the cops like you always think will you just take it because they won't do anything so you miss your kids like that's what you're telling I'm thinking they can't do anything to me I'm a juvenile and it's not true like I don't even think it was possible for me to face life in prison I think there's still kids out there now who may not know that it's possible yeah and it's it's it's real and so on I was like wait a minute where do you tell my wife I thought I was gonna get eight years hey wait a minute and so it like it really made me think like I'm sitting here like sacrificing myself for this man up and for what mm-hmm no changes right in in there yeah they even had two girls testify that you told them yeah that's you three oh really one of them never made it to the trial but yeah what do you mean she never made it she she just ran so like they were in the county jail they're gonna sell next to me and they had made statements hopefully so what's interesting is the one that was also charged with first-degree murder she had the same detective as I did so when they called the police it was seven o'clock that next morning I had just got into the cell next to them 11 o'clock that night that was the first time that I was in a Cell being tried as an adult it was so real to me all I did was cry go to sleep like I didn't talk to anybody I don't want to make introductions I'm not trying to have small talk but they call the police that very next day and said they had information and the things that they had like I didn't tell them that and so like I really I really believe like you know there's a possibility they were fed that information I just think it's too much of a coincidence so yeah and they they testify about all these things they all three had different reasons why I told them what I supposedly told them but no that was taken into consideration don't you feel like they should investigate corrupt cops like that because we've seen that happen so many times where because it's hard for people to think that a cop is lying right until I think of recently where we've seen so many instances where that's happened and it's important to go back and look at these cups and prior cases that they had to deal with and see if there's a pattern of them abusing their power and making things up you know getting people to say that they heard something in exchange for a lighter sentence you know is that something that you even think about now or are you just yeah I think it's I think it needs to be looked into like why is like what is what's going on with with the culture and like you know these police stations with these departments like what's going on with the leaders like what are they what are they putting out there to make these officers think it's okay if I do this like this is cool this is just part of the job and yeah I can lie and say I'm gonna do this to her like somebody's training them to do these things right like somebody's teaching them that this is okay and they're getting away with it yeah you know as a father I'm so intrigued by the childhood you before this situation happened so what what do you think the childhood you needed not to fall victim to a guy like her I think that everybody thinks like they always point the finger at the parents and you know as I mean I'm not a parent but I'm sure that you would know like there's only so much that you have control over you can have control over when they're in your home but when they're not your home and they're at school when they're with their friends you don't know what they're learning you don't know what they're what they're going through you don't know what's happening don't remind me my anxiety was crazy I feel you but you know so there's all all types of things that were taking in and you know there are steps that could have been taken with me at the school I think the school could have stepped up a lot um when you started like getting in trouble in school like what do you mean yeah yeah like obviously that's telling you something's going on yeah like nobody really talked to me and so they counselors yeah like ganas counselors like what are you your dad you sit behind a screen yeah at the in the back of the classroom so that she was separated from the rest of the class imagine what that does mentally to a child to make you feel like I'm just gonna stay here crochet I don't even have to pay attention I don't matter yeah you can even he was bad bad they want to make sure you was nowhere near the other kids but that was their way of doing it well that's what they say but the truth of the matter is why is she looking for are seeking this type of attention what's going on for you that's making you react this way when you started running the streets what were your parents doing like what are you like active and trying to get you out of the streets like I mean yeah like I mean there's someone let me taste it then like when you run from DCs and things like that they don't look for you like when you follow these runaway point nobody was looking for me when my mother was doubt it yeah they were looking to handle it they probably was yeah and so like I would call my mother from time to time I was like nah man she would beg me like you know it still breaks my heart like when I can hear her like in my head like begging me to come home you know it was just a couple weeks before I got arrested I was talking to her and she was like I just come home and I didn't so I mean there's only so much that she could do mm-hmm you know yeah what about your dad you know cuz the thing is all fathers be like well you know that everybody talks tough if that was my daughter I would do this you know but it was nothing he could possibly do because he didn't know where you were right right right you think you were traumatized before you went to jail yeah but like I what I wasn't I wasn't really like processing what was going on because everything was just back to back to back to back so you kind of just hold that in you hold it in you hold it in and I really never even had the time to unpack it and so I was kind of just reacting on it so a lot of the actions even that night were based on things that I had been taking in and things a lot of the trauma that was just lying beneath the surface and you know they presented themselves as me expecting men to act violent towards me me being in this survival mode and you know I didn't have time to deal with the trauma I didn't have time to process what was happening and you know that took place of course when I was in the cell but I know cuz like Jeff Prison adds more trauma to the trauma you already had before you got there so how do you dig deep to deal with that I was in solitary confinement oh yeah for two years what yeah [ __ ] yeah so have you dealt with it at all oh yeah okay okay so when I first got incarcerated I was in solitary confinement obviously you're just there with yourself and like that was rough look I was going through it you know I've looked at some of the pictures that they had of me going through that time and it just breaks my heart because I can remember like you know and there was so much he said you were basically going crazy reading a South Hank yeah that was making you react and you didn't even you kidding keep track of time yes yeah during that time what did you do it all like to release stress or to keep yourself sane it's hard like you know there's reasons why they talk about you know how solitary confinement is so Dutch a grown man like it's it's hard on that break you and two years is that ridiculous and man I was on two years and then when I got out of solitary confinement after I was 18 because I was I was only on solitary mommy because I was a juvenile just because I was a kid didn't want you in general population right right and so you put me on something that you used to punish adults they thought they were helping you right but so whenever I got out and I was around people it was it was weird it was different like I had to learn how to carry on conversations with people because I didn't have that stimulation I didn't have the interaction and you know coming back into that you know I didn't react well I didn't I didn't know how to deal with people sign it up getting into a fight with one of the girls at the prison when I first got there and I went back on solitary confinement hey that's why I hate jail because it's like it's a it's a correctional facility but none of that is correcting you all those doing is making whatever trauma you have worse is breaking you mentally yeah yeah it's a reason they don't say it's a rehabilitation facility the one good thing to happen is you did end up enrolling in school yes and that's where I think the turning point really came for you to have some people that did believe in you and wanted to help you out in particular they started from a documentary on you early on so does that mean they saw something and you in your case that they felt like she deserves some type of clemency something how did I even hear that how did I even hear your case you know so the filmmaker had actually known my attorney and one of the doctors I was doing my evaluation and he was looking for a case you know around juvenile justice because I think like the question when something like that happens is how did this happen like what's what what happened like what's going on like what's the cause of this and you know that's how it started is he just wanted to find out why and the sheriff at the time I given him unprecedented access I didn't know how people and I was like that normal crazy it's not because he wanted to know and he actually told the filmmaker he said if you can tell me why she did this like help me to understand because you know he was he was interested in and learning how to prevent it from happening to someone else and you know when they asked me I was like yeah you know I'll do it because you know one person can be spared what I'm going through right now like I'll do it like people need to know like this can happen and that's what she was hoping the film did yeah and that was just like you know I just wanted people to know at the point that you could you could face life in prison for this like I didn't know that and like I didn't I didn't have the answers I didn't know what was going on I was still trying to figure it out but I knew that there was the opportunity for for other people to be helped right the producers ever gas you up like hey who didn't give you a chance to get out of prison no okay so who was the first celebrity to reach out and you said wow this might actually change this might actually happen I honestly I haven't had any celebrity to reach out to me personally did you know any of this was going on while you was locked up like did a social media campaign no well I found out about it because you know there's still people from the outside who work in the prisons and was one of the prison's guards that had said something about it did they treat you different after yeah like some some not for the good but yeah it was I was treated different after um but it just it just struck me as like it was just amazing not not because of the celebrity element like you know okay that's something but I mean they're just people it was just all the people across the world who were speaking people from all different walks of life you know you had 40 year old soccer moms you had kids you had doctors look you had people from all walks of the world who were coming together saying you know I don't know what to do but I don't think this is right and I want to do something and to finally hear your story yeah you know it's interesting social media had more of an impact than the documentary did because I remember when it first started happening on social media of people was thinking it was a new case and I'm like not it's happening they're like oh six there's a whole doc about yeah yeah I think that is you know I think the biggest impact the biggest influence was God and of course whenever God's ready for things to be brought to the surface like that's when it happened absolutely anyway I think it was all in his timing it was hard for you to believe in God at first oh yeah yeah so I had always you know been raised in the church I'd always you know believed that there was a God but like I believed in religion like I believed if you do this you go to church you pray these things will happen and it wasn't inside discovered how to have a relationship with Jesus it wasn't until I started learning more about him you hear so much and it just kind of turns you off but when you learn like when you actually can open the book and learn for yourself like wait a minute like Jesus didn't say that I'm not worthy because of what I've done that's not what he's saying at all and you know that's more of the things the lies that you hear that you take in as fact without even really evaluating it so like once I learned about him once I started to have a relationship with him once I started to get in his face like that's when things started turning around did you feel like God let you down initially at first out I felt like you know I'm praying to somebody like I'm begging like I've done everything I even had a little mustard seed you know say but he hasn't yeah I would squeeze that little see when I prayed and almost like man if I pray hard and if I pray every single day I know he's gonna hear it he's gonna get this one you know you get a must to see that in prison one of the volunteers run it into me Oh yeah so and it just wasn't like it wasn't it wasn't happening the way I thought it should happen I thought okay I'm not going to get transferred because I'm praying not to be transferred I'm not gonna get life in prison and I got a trial because I'm praying not to get life in prison and so when that happened it's like wait a minute what what is going on and it would take years for me to see like after everything like really blown up and you know talk about my husband and it was like wait a minute like he's been doing this this whole time like his time I was at my time and his will is not my will it's the way that he wanted to have it done and the way that he's done it is a way where it's not just good for sentorria like he's not just freaking Sanjaya other people can get freedom through this other people can see like that he is bigger bigger purpose yeah he is bigger than any sentence he's bigger than any judge and jury and you know that's the same thing my husband said in the very first letter that he wrote me and it was just it was amazing really Jimmy sound story so my husband he does that there you go um so he wrote me you know while I was in prison and I show you got ton of letters so what made you look at that letter read dad yes so it was crazy like I wasn't writing anybody back I did get a lot of lot of letters but you know my attorneys had said that you know don't be writing back because you people were putting stuff on the Internet at that time and it was like anything could be held against you so you want to be very careful while your words can be misconstrued right and so I wasn't writing people back when there was something about his letter he had burnt the edges of it it's like this is really me and then of course he's looks really good yeah so you know I wrote him back and I remember just feeling like just amazed at like this man you got to think about the men that I had known before and his goodness it just like just really came through like he was just a good man he was just a good person he was so easy to talk to and my him telling me a lot of experiences that he had you know things that he had come from you know he grew up very very small town a very poor town you know a lot of cry and he rose above that you know he started his own record label independent artists became successful by the time he was 24 coming from nothing and whenever he was talking about all these accomplishments he cast it back on God he said it was because you know I know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me and there was something about when he said that to me it was like was it me his name is Jamie Jamie King get on the mic on ask your question King you don't mind but put him on that mic you'd put him on over there let me see next his wife just an old NXT my brother and ask you a question King you were good what made you want to write her what moved you to write her well honestly I was minding my business mmm in headlight we had a studio and I had writer's block that day me and my cousin Prince and I was like man imma going out of the room and I'm a kind of get myself together get my thoughts together now I had this TV in this room and I keep this TV on I never turned it off and I usually watch YouTube Netflix or whatever you know I'm saying so the YouTube app was up and it had been up for three days and I'm usually watching sports and stuff like that on YouTube but some for some reason for three days her face was on the recommendations and uh I just clicked it I seen it was an hour-long documentary never heard of it before and I was just like you know what I'm not watching this my attention span out okay I can't watch no so I ended up watching it hour later and I was just like wow as I'm walking out the room I felt God telling me stopping writer Wow and stop it right I'm like and say what now you know anything about me I I take advice for my mother I don't write I don't talk to strangers so I'm just a real low-key dude man so I said alright I'm a writer I didn't know what to say and I prayed about it and what I wrote in the letter I told it basically I said God told me to tell you that you're getting out of prison hmm and tell me about what you wrote at the bottom I put the hashtag free centaurea Brown 2017 before there was that November Wow I sent it I wasn't looking for a reply back it was what he was and we started writing I want to say for me we write for four months and then I went to go visit her when I walked in and see her I knew right then she was my wife well I didn't say nothing but I knew and I was just like I was really struggling as we were visiting because I was like okay God is she if she's my wife why she sit in this prison and what gets missed and screwed a lot on the UM on the internet is that people think that we met you know right what she got right when she got out right do we almost three years in with this thing yeah I bought my life's wedding ring two years ago when she was feeling pretty she was still in prison and we didn't know if she was getting I met him when all my pills were denied like my last appeal to habeas appeal like it had been denied and they told me I couldn't appeal it because in federal court you actually have to get permission to appeal and they had denied that and so my pills were done and there was clemency but less than 1% of applications for clemency meseta sentence even get looked at by the parole board for consideration and then they don't pass most of the ones they look at they just shut it down and so I felt like my chances where it's slim to none at that time and you know he just kept encouraging me and I remember one time I just lost it I just broke down on the phone you know we would spend like hours on the phone like he spent so much money on global telling 12,000 do trust him you know he'd just like there's just something about I'm number one i I had got rid of my trust issues like with men I had to decide a long time ago I wasn't gonna continue to lock cut to run my life from the grave like it just wasn't happening just because he was you know who he was and just because certain men and dummy the way they had this I forget that what baby trusts you you feel me she was locked up you could have said what I'm there with any woman well that's the thing but like I was like I was married before yeah and I married the wrong woman yeah I had the right intentions but I married the wrong woman and I said man I wasn't doing that no more man you know I'm saying like look I'm I'm young I was like I'm just gonna live my life you know I can do anything I want to do I can't go any I'm successful at a whole business running you know saying like I'm like I'm not doing this married thing no more but it's just like no for a woman in prison you see that's the thing though this is why you got to know there's power in the tongue thank you baby talking my brother and it's like my wife when when you when people read a book you're gonna see she made a covenant with God when she said God if you let me out this prison I'll tell the world about you he said okay he answered a prayer but it was 15 years later or something don't matter he comes on time I see I said the same thing I said Lord you know what I'm sick and tired of running around out here before I knew I'm sick of tattooing I want to settle down I mean I've had fancy cars I've had houses I've had all that stuff and it doesn't satisfy me you know saying I want to settle down I want to start a family and I want to really live for you and please you he said hi i'ma hold you to that oh so you got understand man I got in a situation I always tell people man sometimes the counterfeit comes before the real thing and we fall for the counterfeit sometimes but this time I got it right and I know I got it right this is my best friend mm-hm and our courtship through the way we had that to communicate is is unique in itself it's a story in itself with the community I mean just dealing with dealing with let me tell you something from the phones come on at six o'clock in the morning to nine o'clock at night now this is my this I love my wife from 6:00 in the morning I mean from 6:00 6:00 in the morning 9:00 at night the phones go off and I gotta wait to six it aborted to hear from her again I don't know what's going on in that prison Wow I don't know how they treating her in there pretty well because when I would go visit her I know how they treated me oh and sometimes the phones are get cut off phones get cut off I don't hear for four days how did they treat you when you were in it man they treat you like brother I mean one time I see I went to see the first time after I went to see her the first time he was easy freezing then I came back to surprise her on my birthday and when I got there I was met by probably like 20 cops something like that now okay this is unusual they were doing a shakedown this is unusual next thing I know I mean Derek they got me in a cage running the dog around me they said we found weed and you're calm like no you didn't it's on smoke I don't drink don't get down like that they were like well you ain't gonna be able to see you again and I'm like what's up with that and they said well maybe we'll let you come back in a year hmm so I seen her one time came back to see her the second time I wouldn't see my wife again for almost we and they suspended him because his cousin had drove him up there his cousin had a bottle was a crown unopened up in a bottle crown in the glove compartment and his cut in his cousin's card now that's not even like routine was the problem right it's not like he's trying to bring it in the prison yeah no I don't honestly I felt like it all made sense because like I say you asked the question how did she learn to trust me hmm well that was the test right there I thought is he gonna disappear no I stayed for two years brother so powerful about this story man when you say you got to trust in God and you pray for something and you know he showed it to you and you like it may not be you may not be the way you thought you was gonna get it you I pray for one but this woman's in prison but you notice your wife but you gotta trust in God anyway and I look at it like he just hid away from me so I can get myself together who fill me and he put her in like I say brother it's my best friend saying things you know I think that was very and is my first time speaking on this I think it was very selfish I mean I don't know if she's trying to reinvent her career I don't know what she's trying to do cause she's a singer Pam so I think I think it was very selfish of her to do because me and my wife serious man we serious about what we doing receive us about the message and you know I've been divorced from penwick almost four or five years now man I don't know it and we didn't even hang out I didn't see that much more man 24 something like that but I just feel like it was selfish of her to come out and do something like that because it's like you you you you discredit what my wife is trying to do trying to attach your name to something like like this what did she say she warned warned me about me on social media and made it seem like you were doing it for attention well first of all what what do I have for sale or I no longer participate in the music industry that's not my thing I gave that up I tend to my home I tend to my wife I tend to my business yeah we are very financially stable I've heard that something about because my wife has a book deal and I'll get this straight with the without a book deal my wife is gonna be straight cuz we straight and I'm Vince Lee and I don't know why people think that the minute like maybe your name is all over the place all of a sudden he's been taking care of me like you know like everybody just assumes I know things and they don't and it's fine you know I mean y'all didn't know y'all was gonna get to this point like people just don't know things and they'll just take things on the run with it but was your first day home like I was incredible it's amazing like I remember like just coming into the house and just see him he had everything like he had us a house ready you know a lot of people who get out of prison like they struggle to find some places they're worried about that and so it was so good that I didn't have to worry about it um my clothes had a closet full of clothes that he picked out thank god he's got good taste cuz I don't um what was your first meal I see a ravioli whatever you wanted what user can arrive well you know I own a home health business back at Texas man and it was investment that I mean home home elf Wow and he paid off really well for me so we 10 years 11 years in and it's growing but it's all mouth do well see i do diabetic shoes hospital beds we do all kind of you know we got all that so you know smart guys question your birth mother I saw her I think she testified in court she said she drink a fifth of whiskey when she was pregnant with you did that help you to better understand like maybe how your childhood was or maybe some of the choices you made it did I'm gonna tell you like honestly like it upset me so bad but because I had built up this this self-esteem based on my intellect based on what I could do you know I have been going to college you know found out that like wow I really am sorry like you know I got kicked out of school and had gone to school but I've just picked up I'm at the top of this class this prestigious university like you know I'm something mm-hmm and then here they come at this court hearing saying because she drank all this alcohol like I have a place in my brain that apparently wouldn't start working until I was 30 and I was thankful cortex yeah everybody everybody's with the brain right and so normally like your that area of your brain like your brain is myelinated and you're fully functioning all of your connections and things by the time you're like 25 but they said mom was delayed and so they had said you know that I was impaired and I was like wait a minute anything I'm impaired like what do you mean I'm slow like what what's that about and it really affected me and I thought like I started to become angry you know that she did this like you knew you were pregnant and you kept doing this like that's so selfish like how could you do that to me mhm and it just brought back more of the anger that I had and I remember it was Jamie who had his own experience you know being angry his dad that told me listen like it took for my dad to be told he has six months to live for me to forgive him and I thought back on all that time that I wasted being angry wasn't hurting him and you know you've got to forgive her and it was hard you know because every time I had given her a chance after chance after chance after chance since I met her when I was 16 at that hearing like she kept letting me down and she would only come around when there was some kind of attention attached to it she would be soon Toya's mom when it was convenient and when it looked good but like she wasn't there I think she wasn't there and so it was difficult because it was like man here's this lady continuing to try to exploit me and I mean she still does it and I had to learn that just because somebody continues to do something you can still forgive them you don't have to have a relationship with them and so like that's why I'm at now speaking everything no I don't speak to her what I just had parents my adoptive is it always like rubs me when people say you're adopted no she's my mom she's my mother like you know every day we called her Miss B other than God how did how did you get to a place of healing did you go to therapy like what yeah yeah okay yeah he really dug deep and got in there you know saying he's the one who actually approved you know has to get married he's like you know but he dealt with her he dealt with me you dealt with us and you know so he was like your therapist oh yeah I had got to him like when I had started talking to him and everything I felt like you know I've dealt with everything but like there's something about when somebody's like really really like peeling back those layers and then there was more of that like with the rider that you're like cuz you know it takes for you to really look back on things and reflect on things like you have to process all of those things what led me to that why did I think that like what were the the beliefs that that put me in that situation like why did I react this way and so really just unpacking all of that and like there were things like like I told you like I didn't even realize that I had internalized that lie that you know I was I was just promiscuous mmm that I was just loose like I had a manipulated right and so I had internalize that until my late twenties you were being assaulted thank you and so like it took all that time for me to just be like wow like this is getting it alive and believing and like this is why I think this way and this is why I react this way and like sometimes like you blow up for some reason you get angry at somebody and it like reveals something else you have to stop and take the time why did I react that way what is it that I'm carrying with me how did that impact you when you're trying to deal with affected you killed cut it really like mess with me for a long time because you know I'm looking in the in the court I know like what I felt that night and you know on the statute on self-defense it's based on what you go you have everybody who's telling you this is not the truth this is not what happened it's like no I know what I felt I know what I felt and so like I'm constantly going through like okay well he did this and he was show me this gun what did he mean when he did that and so I spent so much time years thinking about it thinking what could I have done differently yeah first of all nature self-preservation yeah oh you felt like you then do you know yeah and so like just going over that like back and forth when you're having people telling you like you know your truth is not your truth it's like but wait a minute I know I'm not crazy I know what I felt and so like yeah that took a long time to to really just unpack that and just I mean at the end of the day it's what I felt it's what I believe to be true did you ever speak to the family at all I haven't I haven't spoken to them I know you know they were court hearing so they had showed up on but I saw you say you would what would you say to them I mean I don't know I guess it just depends on like what they would ask you know if they if they felt that that would be helpful to them you know they didn't do anything they didn't do anything like what happened between me and him like they that had nothing to do with them but you know they're still suffering like they're still suffering the consequences he had a fiancee I'm sure she was like yeah I mean cuz a question is also well why does he have this sixteen-year-old girl mmm-hmm what he didn't know you a 16 is it he didn't owe you 16 he taught you cuz I had said that I was there up from school okay like for the summer yeah yeah he more than what you can tell you can look at me even when I was telling people that I was grown it was obvious if you look at my first mug shot with me in the black like you can tell like look at me in the pigtails you can tell that I was young these men like they knew they knew what I do is ever thought about going back well I know and I would probably be difficult but to define some of the men and and arrest them no because these older men are really preying on these younger kids and younger girls and that's so scary to me know like I don't even yeah like I don't even I don't even like I wouldn't even know where to start like most of the people I don't even know their real names don't even know I know why did you need to apologize to the family because like I said like it wasn't like they didn't have anything to do with that mmm like my actions like it hurt them like it had nothing to do with them right and I mean they pretty much like innocent bystanders you know like I never intended to hurt hurt anyone like that I didn't intend to hurt them and think about 15 years later these people are still hurting but it's like how do you recover from that when someone just up and disappears from your life because if something like that happens you know they spent their own time trying to figure out things trying to piece together like how did this happen how did we get here well no this couldn't have been him like they had this image that they had they knew what they knew about him like so when you have something that's presented to you that know this happened they're like wait a minute that's that's not what I know about him this is my fiance like he loves me like what do you what do you mean like he must have been trying to help her right he must have been doing this yeah you justify what happened and then there was a story that they painted of you that you set him up robbed him so yeah she took his clothes off and after she killed him and that's why he was naked and like you have to understand they're trying to make sense of something that to them it doesn't make sense you know that's a grief and like we can't tell anybody like not accept the apology yeah like I'm prepared for that because again like I can't tell them like you they may feel that you know it's best for they never want to see me they never want to talk to me like that's that's their decision I would never push that on them you know there's people that that I although I forgive them I don't know ever you know like I forgive her but I talk to this lady you know mother do you speak to any of the women that you were in prison with I do I just talked to one of my friends the other day Tyrande um she's currently serving 51 years in prison several of the women you know that I still carry with me who are serving 51 years and these are women who you know they were doing the whole redeemed walk when I was still coming in still just acting kind of crazy and I modeled you know how I should go about serving my time after them and here they are still stuck mm-hmm you know and I carry that with me and I think God's given me an opportunity to give give voice to them like they don't have a voice like they don't have the opportunity to get their stories out and everybody has a story right how do you feel towards the system now I think that there's a lot of work to be done there's a lot of work to be done and you know I'm so glad that we're having conversations about it um it doesn't work I know that there are a lot of people who are actually in control of the system who think it's working just fine but I mean it's not like it's not like the system shouldn't be it shouldn't be a system where it's like completely made to just hold people down to break people like these this is this is people that are still part of the community like you can't just push them to the side and think like that's it it's over it's done many of them are coming back into the community and it's like you can't just just act like one thing that they've done just completely erases the fact but they're a person that they actually belong to this community like you just can't do that right and the education system as well oh yeah you can't just label kids a problem student and then just put them in a different school or in the back of the classroom behind the screen you know just hide them you just have the problem and I think we do that a lot in this country we like to hide problems and I mean I love the fact that now like you know one of the good things about social media is things come to light like people are talking about it isn't [ __ ] a lot of [ __ ] but that's the that's the thing that I love like now people talk about it like you know conversations are you able to do books movies and things like that oh they had like a Son of Sam law where sometimes you can't profit over certain things so you're able to do everything yeah so I know that the Son of Sam law saw anything like profiting like directly from the crime like I think that's in the state of New York every state has their own individual laws in the state of Tennessee there's there's a fun that if you have like certain proceeds the district attorney can say that your your money needs to be frozen for a reward and whatever case you would file later but there's no there's no action that's been filed and the statue of limitations has been run okay so you can do a book and you of course you do a book but you're moving they can't profit off it at all it's all yours Frank you started writing this in prison I did Wow what was the self-help book he was reading a solitary uh Tony Robbins unlimited power okay did I mean I'm sure that you've I could recite that book word-for-word no no that was the one where I was like okay he says that I have to eat this and not eat this and I need to do this and it was no I don't know no cry while you're reading it it'll make you realize a lot of things make you take a different look at like we said an education system prison system and you know thank God you did have some angels along the way I feel like I feel god when I see y'all because all of those things that happen like things don't happen for no reason I mean like those dots don't connect like that like you kept her strong while she was in prison you just had a vision to reach out to her and then y'all came home and did the work with the pastor to get to a place of healing like I don't know man I was running those streets what cutt still you might have been dead too because he was killed I think it was eight months after I was arrested yeah well Wilson Toya Brown long we appreciate you for joining us thank you brother I didn't catch your name cuz you just have Jim good appreciate you for joining us as well thank you so much in the totals music noise now we will turn off yeah it's The Breakfast Club good morning [Music]

Channel: Breakfast Club Power 105.1 FM

Views: 1,804,138

Rating: 4.8321037 out of 5

Keywords: the breakfast club, breakfast club, power1051, celebrity news, radio, video, interview, angela yee, charlamagne tha god, dj envy, cyntoia brown, cyntoia brown long, free cyntoia, cyntoia brown documentary, cyntoia brown interview, cyntoia brown interview 2018, cyntoia brown interview 2019, cyntoia brown prison, cyntoia brown prison release, cyntoia brown prison youtube

Id: 20Twvzsna6c

Length: 53min 40sec (3220 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 17 2019