Bill Burr & Joe Rogan - Toughest Job In The World

i did a bit on the wage gap on my new uh no my new special yeah well there you go well my old thing was like how the [ __ ] did they find out what everybody makes you just call up the irs can we get w2's on everybody they're going to give you that information well uh i don't know i don't know i have no idea but all i know is it's harder for them straight across the board that is the women just everything is harder and all of our lives are easier that's the overall [ __ ] message i say you're being sarcastic i i am no it's just like you have one of my favorite jokes of all time about uh motherhood being the hardest job of the world he goes how's the hardest job in the world when you're wearing [ __ ] pajamas all day yeah no job you can do in your pajamas i love that [ __ ] my wife hates it no no i'm not saying it's it's not [ __ ] no but it's difficult yeah it's it's it's obviously difficult but it's a funny place yeah yeah go work on an oil rig that [ __ ] blows up exactly and as you jump into the [ __ ] like on fire water going underneath that and then you're just sitting there with second degree burns and salt [ __ ] water hoping that coast guard gets there before the shark eats you alive talk to me about you talk to me about the terrible twos have a friend of mine who works at uh oil rig in canada in northern alberta where it gets 50 below zero and i go like how do you do it did you work outside i go how do you do it he goes well you keep the truck running and you work for about seven to ten minutes at a time then you have to go inside the truck for about a half an hour i go really he goes yeah he goes you can't take anymore because any exposed skin you have yes you try to cover your face up as much as possible you put a ski mask on but just your eyes just all around your eyes is all [ __ ] up like everything's [ __ ] up it's like it's just too cold you just can't do it 50 below zero they just work for short stretches of time then they go in the car and then the other guy will go out while he's in there and then he'll go out for like 10 minutes and then they take a break for another 10 15 minutes then the other first guy will go back out again yeah all of those shows make me so thankful that i'm a comedian those [ __ ] crab fishing shows what's the [ __ ] worst job you had as far as physically like like i will kill myself before i'm 30 if i [ __ ] do this out of high school i worked on a uh uh there was a knights of columbus hall that was having a wheelchair ramp built and i had to carry cement bags and pressure treated lumber every day and i only lasted a little over two weeks i think i lasted eight days i was a gopher on a construction site we were we were roofing in june or july and i just remember having to bring up those first of all i brought the wrong i bought the wrong color [ __ ] shingles they wanted the [ __ ] ebony one and this was off about what the [ __ ] it was so i had to go all the way back unload the [ __ ] things i loaded on load some more back brought the [ __ ] things back i just remember dude it was just like i never ate so much in my life like i'd eat like three sandwiches and like a half hour later i'd be like starving and just weight was just falling off of me i was just like dude what the [ __ ] this is insane and but the thing was if i hung in there for like a month i would have got my c legs but i i just was like no but i i didn't have it i knew it i always knew i always knew like when i played drums and everything like that as much every time i thought i was getting good i'd go into guitar center and some eight-year-old kid would get on a kit and i'd be like holy [ __ ] it's like dude i would pay you to give me lessons and it's just like that when you switch when whatever you're trying to do when you see like a kid come in and he [ __ ] blow i mean blows you away it's just like it's just like all right i i this is this is a hobby bill this is a hobby well you mean working doing construction is definitely not a [ __ ] hobby it's just brutal labor there's it's there's a gift as far as like seeing how things go together oh yeah dude there's an art to everything well there's nothing nice to consider contractors oh yeah no i mean as far as building houses but i mean laboring like carrying bags of cement there's no [ __ ] art carrying bags of cement but no but they they would give me [ __ ] to do like you know make this [ __ ] miter cut 45 and i i [ __ ] the same cut up three times in a row it was to frame a door jamb and i kept measuring to the inside of the corner rather the outside of the corner remember the third time i did it my boss just looked at me grabbed the wood and he looked at me the whole time walked up to the frame and never never took his eyes off me and the frame was behind him and he just stuck it to the [ __ ] wall and just stared at me i was so embarrassed i was just like oh god dude he's like dude you're going you went through like [ __ ] twenty dollars worth of stock to make one one [ __ ] cut like what are you doing here i was just like yeah and i was just i didn't even pick up my check i didn't even pick up my check i drove up to the site i i worked monday through friday and then monday tuesday wednesday i drove up to the site and i just looked at it and my body everything just said dude [ __ ] this and i just kept driving he never called why would he call me i'm the guy wasting lumber he doesn't give a [ __ ] he got free labor out of me and i didn't give a [ __ ] and um i forget what what i did after that but that was a rough time for me but like i always knew like if i if i didn't like a job and stuff like that it's like the de niro thing and uh was that the heat you got to be willing to walk at any moment you got to be willing to [ __ ] walk you got to know it's bad yeah that was it that was the probably the toughest physical job that i had and it was also a good it was a good lesson because it was a lesson that like if you work for somebody else and you're just doing labor you're just doing just mindless labor you don't have any time for anything else you think you got eight hours in a day and there's still another 16 you'll get [ __ ] done you're exhausted you're [ __ ] beaten down i would go to the gym and try to work out and i remember trying to hit the bag and i just had nothing there was nothing there i never felt so tired in my life and i was only like 18. i should have been full of piss and vinegar i was just dead and i remember like all my ambition wheels were just ramping up i was like okay this is not my [ __ ] future i gotta figure out what the [ __ ] i'm doing because i i had these delusions that i was gonna become a carpenter i was like well get in the union i'll start building houses that's a good gig which it is you know if you're that's what i thought i was gonna do yeah you know what it's a good gig if you're the guy telling the people to go build the [ __ ] house but if you're the guy out there pouring the forms you've noticed that that's mostly young guys like that is a [ __ ] young even like landscaping like after a while you got to get a crew and you got to be the guy like sending the crews out because there's only so long that you can just i mean like i i feel like like laborers and that they have like the same career trajectory as like a professional athlete somewhere around 35 to 38 your body's gonna be like dude i can't i can't i can't [ __ ] do this anymore you just break down there was uh i i had a bulging disc in my neck and i went to an mri place and uh there was a lady who went in before me a lady waiting and this uh lady i was looking at different people's mris and this lady had the most [ __ ] ridiculous cartoon bulge of her disc some poor woman who uh i think she worked in a laundromat or something like that just carrying baskets of clothes and her back was just so [ __ ] up and she was probably like 40 years old or something like that came over here from you know mexico or guatemala or something and i remember looking at her back like in like this poor lady has no choice she has to go to work there's no way around this and there's no jobs for her other than this you know like what she's she can't speak english like she's got to do what the [ __ ] she's got to do and she had you went into her chart huh he started reading right there it was just sitting up there on the screen and i asked the guy whose back is that he goes it's her it's like holy [ __ ] i go does mine look that bad he goes no he goes that's bad he goes that's bad it's real bad like she could barely walk like she had sciatica up and down her leg

Channel: Bill Burr University

Views: 358,027

Keywords: bill burr, bill burr podcast clip, comedy, stand up, mmpc, advice, bill burr university, bill burr advice, bill burr comedy, monday morning podcast, MMPC, BILL BURR, Joe Rogan, joe rogan, JRE, bill burr joe rogan, joe rogan bill burr, motherhood, tough jobs, hard jobs

Id: D7lM1hGDMRI

Length: 7min 40sec (460 seconds)

Published: Sun Apr 18 2021