BABY GENIUSES (1999) - Weird Movies with Mark

hey guys welcome back to a brand new episode of the show and on this episode I'm gonna be talking about your god it's baby geniuses yeah sorry the thing is this is another one of those infamously bad movies that I knew I was gonna have to talk about at some point but I just kept putting it off and off and off and now now here we are I actually remember when this movie came out in theaters because my neighbors went to go see it and I remember the next day and my neighbor was he came over and II was talking to my parents and I'll never forget he was talking about how much he hated this movie and how bad the movie was and I'll always remember it because he was just so emphatic about it he was just it was the worst movie I've ever seen and it was almost like he had gone mad with with hate it's a movie like he was just he was laughing like cackling about it like what's the worst movie the thing was he's always been just such a nice welcoming friendly person so to see him like that it just kind of burned into my brain cuz I was just so shocked and I remember distinctly thinking to myself just how bad could this movie be I mean it broke this man so here we are 20 years later and I'm ready to face this thing myself so Cheers Blair because this one's for you baby geniuses is one of the most confusing movies I've ever encountered and I'm not just talking about the plot I'm also confused as how this got made in the first place why some of these actors agreed to be in it and how it managed to make a profit I mean this movie made enough to warrant a sequel which I will not be reviewing by the way I know a lot of times I say well this movie is a sequel I'm not gonna review it and then you ask me over and over again mark come on review the sequel and I'm like move you'll review it no not this time no way absolutely not in fact you know what if I was bored and rich so in other words if I was rich I would I would pay people like I would send people out into the world to find copies of baby geniuses and baby geniuses to and buy them and destroy them but that would require just a ton of money totally off topic have you guys ever heard of patreon anyways the point I'm trying to make here is the movie made a lot of money which maybe just goes to show how much more power marketing had when it came to selling a movie 20 years ago I mean back in 1999 we had the Internet but it wasn't the same as it is now news and opinions can spread faster and wider than ever before at the turn of the century reviews and opinions on movies were spread by newspaper articles at the movies and word-of-mouth these days if a movie comes out this bad word can spread pretty much instantly and more people might hold off on going to see something that everyone says is terrible unless you're like me and those are the only movies left that you still get excited for baby geniuses starts off exactly as it should not really making much sense as the baby is able to somehow escape from a heavily monitored underground facility and then beat up a bunch of adults and I don't care that it's a family movie is if that just excuses everything and that doesn't make sense at all they're trying to sell the illusion here of a high tech company that conducts itself underground in a secret lab with security cameras guards helicopters and all of this is completely focused on the babies and then just out of nowhere one of these babies manages to escape and suddenly everyone turns into half-wits anyways Christopher Lloyd shows up out of focus which kind of sucks I mean it's the first shot introducing his character so they take him back into the lab and dr. heap turns on the exposition computer I guess babyco has created an indoor theme park and here comes the doctor in charge of everything dr. kinder and you'll notice that a lot of this movie is dubbed I mean with the babies voices obviously but even with the adults check this out who is saying thank you here it's funny because this is one of the most boring movies I've ever seen but there's so much that I want to see that happened off screen I want to see the people working on these special effects I want to see the table read with the cast I want to see the pitch I'm curious to see if at any point during this production someone just casually said this might be one of the worst movies ever made so they open the theme park and there's all these rides and stuff but then there's this robotic mascot that they say kids will love give me baby bunting bowling what's your name new rule I'm pretty sure that would be disturbing to any child so they put all the kids into a room and watch them I guess this is to try and crack the baby talk code the whole idea is that these baby geniuses know all the secrets of the universe somehow and baby talk is a language that only they can understand but as soon as they cross over into understanding and speaking human language they forget all these secrets or something none of this makes any sense this whole idea of them losing this knowledge when they cross over into human language does it really add up because they can already understand the adults they can understand what they're saying so in other words they already understand the language it took me three attempts to finish this movie because it was so boring so I had to break it up into three separate viewing sessions each at 30 minutes because that's really all I could take at a time and trust me that was not without assistance because when you're watching something this is boring it feels like work just you know trying to pay attention it's like that scene in Clockwork Orange like please stop and this movie is not just that it's boring and that you're not being entertained you actually feel like you're just sitting there wasting away you start contemplating all the other things you could have been doing with your time I'm sorry guys hey you know usually I would like to think that most of the time I'm pretty fair would you say but with this there's really no this is like all that war I guess I just feel bad for every well actually no okay well okay as long as everybody who worked on this film got paid good for them I'm that bad I'm cool but I guess I feel well I still feel bad for the people that went out paint money to see this like my neighbor took his whole family out to this thing could you imagine just Ken the van kids we're off to see baby geniuses it's not the money it's the time you don't get it back don't turn into me guys everybody who's watching this please like if you're thinking about doing this just run run far run fast all right where am I here I think I've covered like five minutes into the movie anyways most of this movie is just crammed with gags that run on forever characters that quite honestly I don't even know why they're in the movie this character for example is basically just in the movie to be weird every time he's on screen he's got a new getup and that's pretty much the joke look how weird he looks this time everybody too bad it has nothing to do with the story or the plot and ultimately leads to nothing the jokes of these babies being smart making puns and trying to act like adults dry up super quick but the movie just keeps running them into the ground take off your clothes [Music] the visual effects of making the babies look like they're actually talking is pretty well done and this is the first time it had been done in a feature film so I have to give the movie credit for that it's just too bad that all this was wasted on this movie visual effects are great and when done properly they can really add to a movie and again this effect is interesting at first but it's not enough to carry the film so somehow Sylvester that's the baby's name by the way is able to escape again this makes absolutely no sense but whatever and he ends up at the mall and then this is when he gets mixed up with his twin brother oh no I bet this is gonna lead to something big but it really doesn't honestly there's really no stakes here it just becomes a quest to break into the facility and get back his twin brother then there's the big sequence in the amusement park where Sylvester starts controlling all the robots and for some reason all these guards are just unable to defend themselves there's something else here about the dad understanding baby talk but it never really becomes a big thing and in the end everybody is okay even the guy who kept dressing up in these ridiculous outfits look he looks like a regular kid now I guess his character arc is complete trying to find the worst part of this movie is really difficult but I would have to pick the very ending and the reason is because the movie ends with a montage of clips from the movie you just made it through the worst movie you've ever seen and then they put you throw it again it's just the feeling of despair and hopelessness is palpable it's like the cinematic equivalent of waterboarding you know you feel okay well that might be a bit too far please end this movie I bet you just stop the reel I can honestly say that I genuinely hated this movie you know some of the movies on this show they're bad but they're still entertaining and I've always felt like searching for a great bad movie is like mining for gold you know you got to go through a ton of crap first but eventually you find you find nuggets this was just a nugget of crap and this was a situation unlike any other I've encountered seriously it he put me in a mood I can't even describe you know I hated writing this review I know I'm gonna hate editing this video but here's hoping that the next were actually in fact Oh am I saying here's hoping I know that the next one is gonna be more fun so I hope you had fun watching me break down before your very eyes as usual thanks for watching I'll see you guys next time

Channel: FanboyFlicks

Views: 92,691

Rating: 4.9233451 out of 5

Keywords: baby geniuses, Comedy, Funny, Hilarious, Bad movies, movie reviews, Bad Movie (Film), movie review, Reviews, fanboy flicks, horrible movies, worst movies, rotten tomatoes, best bad movies, weird movies with mark

Id: S4rGnCSrglg

Length: 11min 5sec (665 seconds)

Published: Tue Dec 03 2019