Awkwafina & The Care Bear Inside | TigerBelly 322

they were open did you see me anybody see me open her phone not while i was sitting here now thank you so much and that's why you and i should be detectives that's the truth through detection detectives yeah true detectives yeah i think that you and i would be honest with each other if we were detectives i highly doubt that he is i would save information i would save information for myself so i want the glory he also will flip it on you oh god detective information truth one day it's it's yeah no way no what i would if i okay if nora and i were lead detectives let's see let's give me the scenario you have early onset the men shot thing give me the murder scenario and we're detectives give me the scenario that's a cool show though detective with dementia okay here we go you have a jane doe approximately fifteen to twenty vernon veronica fifteen to twenty yeah fifteen to twenty we think right right what are you doing to dispatch what are you doing here yeah i'm the i'm the so we're we're in the car we're getting the call we're driving we're driving right what if we're on separate assignments and you no i don't you want to be together oh i call you late at night no no so what this is what happens you're the dispatcher right so call me all right we have a jane doe who's this i have to ask because i don't know i need the information she didn't present herself yeah yeah yeah out of nowhere you're gonna say that we have a gene dog i'm a cop right i just stumbled onto this body by the river oh got it all right my bad yeah all right so and i'm calling you i'm calling you you're calling me all right so yeah you found a body yeah i'm just just so you know this scenario if you're already a detective and you don't know who's calling you about a jane doe like you're not doing your job very well he calls you on your police phone [Laughter] right and then she wouldn't call you on your personal not only that nora don't you believe that like if i was like above it right that i gained more respect like i don't know who anyone is right all right right right right i know i know who you are yeah but i pretend that i don't all right well i'm a policeman just keep the goal going all right go ahead you're the chief yeah i'm a chief all right henrietta the ladies needs to get [ __ ] solved she's dead she's dead let's get this going family members yeah yeah okay listen yeah she only has a torso what what i'm not going yeah torso oh [ __ ] i gotta call that [ __ ] bastard nora and then you call chief go ahead oh what am i calling you're we're still talking about [ __ ] all happening still yeah we never got off man all right i gotta call [ __ ] nora well do your thing then [ __ ] i just hung up what if there's more information that's it first i gotta see if you're available well i'm i feel like i'm on like sabbaticals like i am like yeah and i'm like you know i don't you know i'm not doing this anymore bud i'm not doing it anymore yeah yeah or can we make yours more like the mel gibson from um lethal weapon where you live in a trailer like you drink you have a dog you live in a trailer maybe an ipad like you're jaded yeah i live in like i live in like vancouver or seattle like northern sea level rural very moody detective weather right yeah so what is that puget sound right yeah yeah the the i'm talking forces at the university of puget sound yes yeah are you really marine biology are you really no oh my god foreign yes because kesha went to the galapagos to study who the [ __ ] is kesha oh kesha is kesha i just found out about who travis scott is oh i know let's move on i don't know that's appropriate i don't think that's but i didn't know who he was yeah so that's a good thing yeah you learned okay good thank you so much so i called nora uh timber okay right right all right so ring ring oh yeah what it's me what the [ __ ] is this you gotta itch you gotta angry with her for nothing yeah yeah montgomery oh it's me montgomery hey henrietta just called you ward you just heard from henrietta or what what what did you just hear from henry yeah yeah i did how'd you know every time i call you i i talked to henrietta she called me oh [ __ ] [ __ ] yeah that [ __ ] [ __ ] chief we had she's like she went from a dispatcher to a field cop dude now the chief of the entire [ __ ] she did that in [ __ ] one minute she changed herself from receptionist anyway let's move on yeah yeah all right so you're good with torsos right yeah i found my no she's no no she's no torso you're strictly torso she's strictly head why would i call her if [ __ ] the [ __ ] this just finish it let's get to the point okay fly down i don't think i can let's finish come on come on um do we know her name henrietta no you're not no no i told you early onset dementia france what's his name what's her name you can call me friends francois all right come on francois please remember the the severed head case that i helped you with yeah i did because i'm good with several cases yeah right remember i told you that the laceration marks on the neck couldn't come from a you know song that's it right remember and you're like oh yeah it can't come from a saw bit yeah like a different knife demonstration right in court i had to go all the way to seattle right right spend four days in that [ __ ] courtroom right all right well this saturated balloon has this made in 1976 and it couldn't cause the your last race and they make right pretty good right mm-hmm yeah and so um would you help me you know i really don't want to but i love you but yes okay so this is how i would cheat all right we go to the crime scene right and i see a titty no not a male titty a female titty nipple um underneath the couch the body's there okay the river bed is it in the river yeah the riverbed there's a liverpool riverbed let me ask you this are there abandoned couches by riverbeds there can be la river i've seen it let's not even question if it's a hangout spot oh what are those late night when they do racing when the punk rock kids go and they go to that spot and they have the the race is that what yeah and they like work on their friendships every night yeah yeah so what i would do is i would see the eye the nipple and i would take my plastic you know they have the plastic bag yeah mm-hmm what's that i'm i'm putting i'm sneaking the plastic bag underneath the thing so i can grab the eyeball i was thinking i want evidence not tell nora about it so that when i have to present it i can look like i know more than her that is some fox mulder scholarship that's exactly what mulder would do i know that is like he would totally just get her in so much more trouble by abducting a stray nipple of a crime scene what about where the [ __ ] did you get that montgomery henrietta's gonna kill you i know yeah you know how mad you would be if i presented it how bad would you be i would flew all the way from seattle [ __ ] yeah yeah if it was against protocol i'd be mad okay let's go back to introducing you and let's see yeah yeah yeah i don't know why we started that was our cold opening i love it i love that i love that a lot yeah so go ahead [Music] hello everybody how many episodes is this gil dude i think we're over 320. my god what a voyage and you know we don't get people back here often you know no sometimes people are one and done yikes they're harsh if you're listening right now and you did our podcast one time you'll come back you're coming you're coming right so i don't want to feel let's not do it but but this um young talent that we have can i say that sure i love that pretty good huh yeah did it make you feel good yeah okay i did i does yes this young fresh talent thank you with a new voice dynamicism dynam dynamic wow right she um i think when she did our podcast before we did it in the apartment yes yeah it was before crazy rich asians it was before right this is before the gigantic wave that she's gonna mean surfing on right it was a while ago yeah right and this is what you don't realize this nora i might get emotional no don't bobby don't no don't what you don't realize is the honor because you made it big and you came back to the roots to help us out and that's how i'm seeing this event okay all right yeah so god damn it call me montgomery okay montgomery thank you i love you brother you know what else another brother can i say something else brother during my birthday party okay when i saw you at what's his name dumbfoundead you said you loved him before he just said you loved him you literally said he was your favorite person give him everything okay i can't keep that in public [Laughter] yeah but um you know when i went to his show and i saw you there um you said a couple of i was really depressed i came back in the party i felt good about that but in general i was depressed and you said some real nice things to me and i really appreciate you brought some interesting people to the show you did too you did too you who would i bring gina grisham junior sean i think she would if if if you let her she might do love to you she loves you that much i love gina gershon i mean i grew up watching her movies like crazy me too yeah i'm a huge fan of hers huge fan so talented don't you love it when you meet somebody that you were a fan of and they're [ __ ] cool yeah they meet your expectation like like meet your heroes you know what i mean yeah me you're one of those what yeah you're a hero that when you meet it exceeds if not me tell me more no yeah no yeah yeah okay yeah all right it succeeds it's nice but i don't like okay i brought gina grisham but then you also you borrow out be like benedict you know like he's the army he's one of our maids he's one of our main superheroes yeah yeah right yes you didn't bring you didn't bring shang chi did you no was not there that night no oh i want to meet chungchi yeah i'm sure he'd love to meet you is it good powerful you guys actually met at my thanksgiving what but you didn't we didn't he wasn't chongchi yet oh what do you have like an all asian out thanksgiving sorry yeah no he just when he first moved here he didn't have anywhere to go for thanksgiving and his manager brought him to my place why didn't you say that he could have been a power though hey this asian guy will be a superhero yeah if you would have said that that i would have been like you know i don't know you guys were laughing you guys talked about it then you would have come you were chill oh he was a good guy yeah he didn't big time him he didn't you didn't thank god you big 10 people what does that mean i'll tell you okay okay yeah let's suppose you're in a hotel uh-huh which you're in a lot right yeah you're in london you've been in london lately oh yeah right yes you stay at a hotel when you're in london or a house uh sometimes a hotel let's just go with the hotel okay okay yeah because the other way it won't work okay so we have to go because everyone would be like in my house that would be what you call the cops so we're not in the house we're in the hotel hotel you're in you just get off that you're gonna get some coffee right and you can see 30 high school kids uh the iu and they all you could see them all whispering oh right you can tell you know there's always one high school guy that's like i'm the brave one like he'll just look at his friends and go check this out uh-oh so you can get some you know man yeah and he walks up and you know that once he opens the floodgates you have to do 30 pitchers sure sure you do to 30. yes yeah probably me too you would do no you wouldn't [Laughter] you wouldn't yeah you know i i don't know what it is i think um it's it's a very circumstantial if i like try to rush out of something like that you know like because generally if i'm just being caught it's like kind of it's like you know it's i'm gonna get caught what do you mean like it's like if there was a crowd and i'd rather go out taking the pictures than going out with them being like wow she was such a [ __ ] you know right right like yeah so it's not it's it's actually it doesn't like take a lot for me to do i mean i if if you like me i don't mind it but yeah yeah i totally see what you mean i think that some like i i'm definitely around some people that get like swarmed and and they and they really can't leave a space you know yeah yeah because i would i don't want to i don't make fun of me because i feel like it's me that what i'm saying but it's like you know sunday i shot that scene with sarah jessica parker in manhattan oh [ __ ] no we're in manhattan it's like traffic and then now i have to do this difficult dialogue crossing the street right where there's thousands of people in each corner taking photos of paparazzi coming out of nowhere right yeah yeah and i looked at her and i go i don't think i can do this right now really so much pressure i mean you perform to like thousands of people okay it's your partner okay you know you can do it i get it i get the fervor i get it with the torso oh yeah sorry torso sorry sorry it's okay you could eat it's not the same it's not the same we get it it's yeah why do koreans do that what zero to one hundred and one point five seconds theatrics we're in theatrics you know yeah but culturally we do it too yeah it's like even if if i or watch any korean movie it's always mumble mumble mumble scream mambo stream because our emotions are fluid and yeah we connect them all so what you know koreans are extra feelers like in star trek next generation would be beta betazoid mm-hmm you mean troy you know what do they do it just makes me upset that no one knows what star trek next are they not as good as like alpha zoids no no betazoids is a brace of people that can feel other people's feelings empaths their empaths oh cool yeah yeah so in the show they're empaths they're like an mbti army right yeah yeah and so um when i'm feeling all right like right now i'm feeling wild and i feel content yeah hungry right so i'm feeling this right now now if i feel anger i it just bleeds into that feeling but does the anger just come out of nowhere and it just sticks its head out yeah but i do i don't do it to strangers because my dad used to do that scream at people yeah he would call i mean he he swung a golf club to two big like i think they're mexicans but right he went and they took a [ __ ] golf club and started swinging at them i remember being in the corps scared so it's like damn i don't want to do that in public sure you didn't i don't think that that was fine i was okay that you yeah i also felt you weren't in danger i mean i looked at your eyes no right you're calling you're causing drama no no no kalila's watching out she's looking out yeah i apologize for that i come from a screamy household what chinese people don't have that um [Music] i i don't know if it's the same like what you're talking about with koreans like with the mama mama and then but i feel like there there's a distinct separation between like one it's like it's like normal and then they're just like pissed like i feel like you have to get there like you have to say like i never liked you dad you know yeah yeah like go like crazy yeah do you ever say that to your dad when i was really young once i was like dad i love you but i don't like you ooh yeah what was his reaction he was he got upset he was upset oh my god it was like it was like oh you you don't have to lie like that kind of thing yeah because if i said that to my dad you know dad i love you but i don't like you the first thing i would hear is that's my conscious going off oh you turn off yeah yeah yeah you know how like a android or whatever when they get shut off yeah just like i see that in my eyes yeah right right right and then maybe two or three hours later i wake up and i think i'm laying there i have a black eye oh i'm never gonna say i like that's how i learned i'm never gonna say that to him again oh your dad was never violent um not past a certain age i mean not and not violent i think he was definitely disciplinary in yeah i would tell my mom i loved her and she'd still punch me in the mouth oh oh yeah but yeah i'm so sorry babe yeah that sucks but i think [Laughter] you should feel that did you feel that yeah yeah yeah i think it makes you the type of person you are cognizant right of looming dangers yeah yeah right i'm always like bracing and yeah yeah for that change you never know when a backhand is around the corner yeah i know yeah yeah i'm skittish yeah but you can always tell when somebody was raised good i think can you or no um uh i i can tell when someone's been raised has never been hit like violently they're a little bit more like less skittish like when i look at george kimmel i'm like oh there was love and stability and like kindness i could tell that too ah yeah he's very even keeled he doesn't have a lot of like really terrible days throughout the year is this true yeah oh okay good he's a happy guy yeah he's just the type of guy that i can call him and i've done this before 24 7. oh i feel like an [ __ ] saying this say it no matter what he's doing i'll just go i need yellow american spirits he's like i'm helping my child and he's on the other side of town and a couple hours later there'll be yellow american spirits outside my house wow that's amazing right now you want something oh you keep extras you should just get a carton that's what you do nowadays oh you didn't know i didn't know he did that i thought he thought he would go to the store every time interesting so it doesn't feel as good he learned tactics he went to costco and got a bunch of i know no cases that's thinking smart that's thinking smart and working smart you know that's right that's good but i've always thought that nora had um good upbringing oh he's a nice you know he's just a nice person you know in fact all the asians for the most part in the business are really nice right yeah i i don't i think when you're doing your life's work that you love and you're surrounded by cool people there's no reason not to be not nice yeah i also think that maybe like the way that different upbringings like i feel like there's there's something shitty about you can find in any upbringing you know i mean yeah well kids are sensitive right and we're learning about i feel like you fight your nature a lot no like your nature is a very like tenderhearted like kind soft being but then he he really latches on to chaos and self-destruction a lot you fight your nature can i be both i wish you were you would you know you want to be the big bully to george but you're not you just aren't yeah you want to be viewed as this guy who asks for you know who feels joy thinking about george driving 12 miles to get american spirit you know yellow american spirits you want to be perceived that way but when you're at home you're just a little care bear i'm the scariest bear yeah and the thing is is that are you saying that when i call george and say get me cigarettes that i'm not feeling any kind of power leverage of that i'm trying to fake it i don't i truly think that you want to be something that you're not like whoa his face is broken it will take a second you know it's like you're you're maybe a riot new zealand's jacinda on the inside but you're you're trying to be hitler on the outside wow yeah i don't want to be hitler i don't want to be hitler it doesn't feel right it feels wrong it's just going to bury yourself that's like that's that might be like toxic masculinity i think about a napoleon complex [Laughter] go keep going short round you know i've had i've had a lot of negative stuff why don't you keep going that's a good thing napoleon complex fat what else what else little angry little man huh want to get his vengeance out in the world angry little elves oh i'm not even [ __ ] human [Laughter] [ __ ] i'm not even human in that oh you're so cute and soft stop just be that [Music] um guys we are and we will always if they would have us but we are partnering with calm partnering we're partnering with com the number one mental wellness map and to give you the tools that will improve the way you feel don't you want to know how you feel and feel good yeah it's part of my nightly ritual i brush my teeth i take a shower i cuddle up in bed and i listen to the daily guided meditations it improves my focus um clear your head with these guided daily meditations improve your focus with calms curated music tracks and drift off to dreamland with calm's imaginative sleep stories and if you go to calm.com belly you'll get a limited time offer of 40 off of calm premium subscription which includes hundreds of hours of programming can i say something uh-huh over 100 million people around the world use comm to take care of their minds sleep more stress less live better with calm what's your favorite sound on there i love tweets like little tweety birds 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gonna you know what i think you just changed me how i think i'm just gonna be that be that bobby you're the kindest person i know what's up did you meet nora aquafina how are you hi hi it's my niece oh that's just a podcast with bobby no idea what's going on nice let me ask you is that what you're going to wear to do jeremiah's podcast in pajamas all right cool just coming up come on in come on you come in for a second i need to talk to you about something you do stand in the middle of the [ __ ] room she's doing a podcast yeah yeah number one i've been gone for three weeks when i saw you today i know but you i i know but i want a hug yeah but you didn't greet her happy birthday oh oh my god wow i don't know happy birthday thank you thank you i'll see you three weeks okay see that's why give her the keys give her the keys i don't have them you better stand in the middle oh they're right here do you want these one last thing though one last thing one last thing you have you've been using the car yeah all right sorry no when i went into the car earlier right what did the thing say one it wasn't her it wasn't her i can actually tell you it wasn't her you no it was marianne she took the car for three days and didn't fill it back up wait wait wait [ __ ] face mary ann took my car for three days yeah she took her daughter to disneyland though be nice oh disneyland oh no oh my god all right one last thing one last thing one last thing right you represent the family you kill it on the podcast it's a franchise baby she's gonna kill it all right you're gonna kill it don't make me look like a fool by jewel drive safe that's hilarious that's what i'm talking about i wasn't gentle there no you weren't i went against my nature yeah but you love her so deeply yeah so you you read gas from like one what does one mean one bar of gas one bar of gas of gold no gas of gas so it's like it's like the equivalent of like one bar of like a phone yes yes yes no it's not equivalent no i i disagree no don't have to do not do that just because she's you know that's exactly like it is like don't do that you're wrong you're absolutely wrong no there's six bars okay okay right eight bars how many miles is one bar here's the deal dude my brother and i five years ago rented a car a lincoln okay we were driving you know los angeles because you live in l.a now last year you know when you go to la cienega boulevard and it turns in the sunset yeah you know exactly where that yeah how steep is los angeles boulevard it's pretty steep huh [ __ ] steep as [ __ ] would you say right yes yes okay so one day on a friday five o'clock i was going up that [ __ ] road it was raining and friday clock at five o'clock in that road is the worst traffic on planet earth yeah and i ran out of gas there while it was raining oh my god imagine what i call it stevie with stevie right him and i had gasoline all over her body because we didn't know how to open the [ __ ] thing so when we would pour it in the car it would go on our oh my god siphoning it oh my god and people were like [ __ ] you like driving by going [ __ ] you i don't wanna outsider on it you know what i mean so a doorman named steven fury drove by he's no longer a doorman he's a legitimate he's a legitimate comedian but back then he was i feel like i made him so throw that out there but um he made you from this experience so he so he's like i'm steve and i'm a doorman i'll go get so he went and got gas he did it for us we drove away and he opened for me wow yeah but my point is ever since then even if it's a bar nora i get scared that i'm gonna get run out i'm gonna run out of gas don't you don't get scared um i've been so poor that i've been on e so much that i know exactly oh yeah because like i put exactly five dollars in just to get to class so i'm always hovering on e so i know exactly how many miles i have on my old camry there's always a dude that's like nah after that it's 25 miles those are almost 25 mile guys yes i feel like that's true because they can't they're not going to leave us like that yeah they can't leave us like that especially on a prius you have at least like 60 miles oh that's like a hundred thousand miles yeah after i don't know that i've been telling you for eight i don't like it i just don't like it i don't like the fear right yeah leave me two three two three bars the worst is when you're like i don't i mean if you've been to new york like the i-87 and you're driving like in the middle of the night between like 30 mile exits and you don't know when you can get gas next that's when it hits oh that's probably the worst yeah and then you go on your google maps or whatever right and then you you can it's so far away from where you are yeah yeah i can't do that that's it i feel the anxiety too yeah yeah yeah does your car make a noise or i have yes yes it does what do you have a what no i it does make a noise probably doesn't need gas i know who is a tesla it's that people have a tesla yeah people have teslas i have friends have teslas yeah i thought you were talking about a tesla earlier i did it wasn't i can't afford it but um for the special people what does a tesla do i didn't roll up here to tesla no i don't have it you have more than one car yes you're five cars no no so what's doing well that's all now let me ask you this nor i i don't know i mean because you know we've seen each other last couple years yeah but your life has changed dramatically would you say or no i mean since we last since a lot i mean no since the last time you did tiger belly to now right would you say that your life has changed dramatically i wouldn't say dramatically but i'd say i've changed and i think certain circumstances in my life have changed yeah yeah and how was i mean dealing with it have you been good about it healthy about it or has it been stressful um i think it's been stressful like i feel like uh but i i realize a couple things that like depression and like anxiety is a ghost that just comes to haunt you in different faces in your life you know and i feel like sometimes my brain searches for things to go wrong and you know what i mean yeah so it's like as long as it's as long as i know that it's that then yeah but i try and i also try not to get too carried away i think like i i remember what it was like to be really broke and i remember what it was like to just be happy to be anywhere you know what i mean so like i that hasn't escaped me yeah i think it's important i don't want to say his name i'm not going to say his name but i know a guy that made it at 15 right he never had a day job yeah right yeah and he's kind of a dick yeah i i have to admit i mean you know you're saying that i'm a sensitive guy i'm a nice guy listen this guy's a [ __ ] [ __ ] mm-hmm like legitimate like what an i like i want to look in his face and go you're a [ __ ] ass man you're a man but i'd never do it because he's big like a physically big guy so he'd smash me you know what i mean and i only get smashed in the face you know my point is is that he never had a day job you and i what's the worst job you had day job worst uh maybe an air conditioning company or something like that i worked at an air conditioning company doing what i don't know what i was doing there's like this show called rocco's modern life where there was you ever seen that you know conglomo his neighbors uh i forget what they were they're like frogs think frogs yeah so this one he just enters in numbers there's like a stack of papers and you enter in numbers and you just over and over again and the stack gets littler that's what i was doing oh my gosh that seems miserable yeah are you in a room yeah like a room with other people yeah or you're are you in cubicles like this you see in the movies no oh no i've never seen those in real life i think a snail oh yeah oh what were they called what were they called again fat heads i don't remember wow yeah so when you're doing this all day and then finally you know i mean you're doing what you love doing and you're making a little money you mean yeah you can remember yeah yeah and you also i think you also just remember what it's like to just you know um just be treated like with [ __ ] all the like [ __ ] all the time you know yeah like just being yelled at and stuff like that on the street i know by customers i know you ever feel like um we've talked to a couple friends like do you ever feel as though like who you are let's say five years ago has been like stifled a little bit or you have to be you have to present a different way in a more appropriate way i think yeah sure i think your authentic self will always exist within you i think where and in healthy conditions of of expanding that authentic self i think can be stifled by certain aspects of this industry like which is um you know you just you just kind of want to like maintain a sense of self when when i think your sense of self and your perception of self is being is being different all around right all the time so it's like um yeah yeah that's really interesting i sometimes feel like if i when i was working when i was taking the subway all the time when i was going to school in the city and like when i was hanging out with my friends you know doing bi byob restaurants things like that like i there was a a kind of a part of the zeitgeist that i felt i if there was material for anything like i feel like that was very rich in material because you're you're observing things from like like a very like linear standpoint of like you're part of the culture i feel like when you have don't have a day job and you're in your house all day which i do when i'm off like you you're not part of the of any zeitgeist you're not a part of any moving thing and i think that feeling is stifling and then i do get this fear that like um my mindset will be trapped into that of an immature 20-something-year-old which i still feel like i i like come back to that immature person but like uh i don't want to feel trapped in that person yeah like i want to i can grow yeah you know when it was a younger comic and i would take bigger comics and i go um well i ca i have to work at a club and you know i can't eat you know this and that right and i go i want to go you guys must be so happy but no we don't you know definitely yeah yeah like i feel like there's all yeah for sure like when i was first coming up i would meet people and be like dude you're you're like living the dream and yeah just like you don't want to live my dream you know yeah and i've said this like the best days i think of my career in terms of the excitement and and not to say that i don't feel excited now i i do it's different it's like waiting for something to happen but also living within whatever means that that was as as long as i can make 500 a month for my rent i'm like i'm good yeah that's that's another thing that you're saying that i agree with which is when you're younger and you're in this business and you get a big job out of nowhere right that feeling you can't beat it no right it's the best it's the best feeling you're like who's in it yeah but what's going on there's this pressure also because it's you know it's a big job and you know it's out of your league so you could just step in do it you don't your mind isn't even about owning it and succeeding right just like just do it and don't don't like die in the process no my thoughts always just get i see this is my internal dialogue say your [ __ ] lines get through it you're fine you're fine you know what you're doing they don't see through you you're mean you belong here and i have to do these like mental exercises to my you're fine you [ __ ] up and the line's fine everyone [ __ ] i like if i [ __ ] up on a line i want to go like this i don't want to sit and do it now but this is my gut reaction okay you could do that give me a line oh harry is going to be here tomorrow harriet's going to be here coming from [ __ ] oh yeah i that's my god and it's okay a lot of people do that by the way i know i did i i've done that i know it's so hard not to but it freaks people out no it i i don't think it does no okay here's what you need to know about they sorry they have seen everything right they've seen everything so like that's just they just know that that's your way of doing it and also the more endearing vulnerable cute part is that you care right so it's not like you're [ __ ] up the line and you're like i'm gonna [ __ ] up the line and i'm not i don't even care yeah but you're you're there's a process going on if anything i think they just don't want you to think too much and be too um messed up by it because you know i mean no one wants to see that no one won't see it but i don't think that they think you they're freaking out and they think that you're weird i think that they if anything it's cute yeah and dumb literally gave me these exact chairs i'm sorry to call him out i don't want to call him out he's just fine i don't want to call him just biting and fighting no they're they're they're blue but they're exact [ __ ] snake [ __ ] you loved him at one point he korean [ __ ] you loved him man wow you loved him at one point earlier today earlier today all right um dumbfounded yeah tell him i'm sorry dumb dumb i'm sorry i know i know that i'm more artistic than you i know that my visual color stylings and um well well i'll just say though they're green and pink it it it's a little better than ours if i had thought of that okay well what what you're doing right now i what you're doing right now i love green and peach together it's a great combo that's gonna be a tough one to it's a wrong whatever you're doing right now is wrong it's the wrong thing i don't know what else to say to you it's the wrong thing let me go back to dumb now dumb you rat [ __ ] right i know that you're the way you walk is like kind of like mine oh oh yeah a little bit okay if you look at if you look at him walk his long if you close your eyes you close you close your eyes and your ears no but from afar if you see me and dumbfounded walking on a prairie right from afar right your binoculars all right imagine you two are well if not you're a prairie mm-hmm you seem dumb walking across right twisting your head through the reeds and you'd be in a waddle it's so cute oh sweetie oh my gosh it's fun it's fun you just see the tip of this beanie coming through the grass that's fun that's fun stuff but i would see it literally moving in the same silhouette anyway so you stole that from me um secondly you stole my the color design of our podcast yeah right and now [ __ ] face what you're doing is you're looking at fur travel of ours because you know it's good to furniture and you're going wow you know i mean but he gave them to me he's not using them that even hurts more what you're saying to me gifting people your style no what he's doing is he orders stuff right stuff that we have yeah he tries it at home and he looks at it and goes this is junk right i'm going to give this away to nora is that what he's doing yeah that's exactly what he did yeah exactly you [ __ ] um korean wrath you're a korean rat dude and you know what dude we'll work together but i don't know man oh man yeah yeah you [ __ ] up there's something that broke yeah yeah anyway um you know wherever we go noro we take ourselves with us yeah so no matter what is going on in your life you think you can fantasize and go if i made this money or if i did this or this you know at the end of the day you generally feel the same oh totally i think i feel sadder today than i ever have my whole life why i don't know she feels she's depressed i'm super depressed right now yeah it's more than that yeah you're gonna cry right now no i'm not gonna cry i don't know i want you to cry but i i go through big like ups and down ups and downs this is right on time i think usually november is when it starts for me do you find that it's oh so it's a seasonal you think it can be i have uh bipolar too so my mania is not high but my depression is real low oh no yeah yeah yeah i feel like my i i i have like a cyclical aspect to my mood that i'm starting to notice now like a monthly aspect to my mood yeah i feel like i go between like really angry and like like overconfident in like a not a lit way yeah and and just like whatever like and then and then like really fragile too like whatever and then to like actual fragile sad well i call those days the angry and confident and i call those um um my sister and i call those the ronnie days the testosterone days where it's like closer to your periods your estrogen is completely depleted i feel like an [ __ ] of a dude right yeah like i just want to like eat all those yeah yeah yeah nachos and stuff yeah yeah and then i get like kind of like scared like like it devolves into like paranoia i guess is that like yeah i don't know maybe i go through all you smoke weed yeah yeah a lot um not like not not as much as when i was younger younger yeah do you think that it inhibits paranoia or i think people that have been doing it for a very long time yeah right are used to it yeah i know dudes that smoke weed and can act like be completely high and go on a movie set and kill it oh yeah i'm not that i can't do that would you be able to do that uh not well no i think i i i would get too much in my head yeah yeah yeah let me ask you this would you get high let's say because sometimes like just let me carry on sometimes you know the next two scenes you don't have any lines oh so it's like vacation scenes where i'm just crossing yeah yeah yeah yeah or sometimes they make you do like a thing where you're the reverse so you just have to say one line to you know i mean right right right so you're just standing there right would you get high for that if i was going to get high in any in any scenario probably yeah yeah like a hand insert yeah would you think that some high guy would be like see your hands in a movie and go like oh jesus totally yeah high and non-high hand insert all right so probably um i don't know how to do this but let me try okay yeah let me try that's your camera camera right yeah all right so um a normal insert would be like this okay what are you doing too by the way no um come in and just and just like turn off the just so it's a little music box so you have to come into the box and then there's like blocks i've never seen a music box before this big like this all right i see it with one of those little things yeah just one round though one round yeah the props guy is angry all right yeah so don't test them yeah yeah yeah because they always make you give you a conversation like dude you know there's only one of these man so it's like you've got to be with me man multi-million dollar [ __ ] movie you can't get more than one it's the personal property of our executive producers great grandma yeah yeah it's from egypt dude 17th century and you're like music blocks from egypt so um this is how i would do it um normal right okay i'm not going to get this right because i take longest with insert shots really yeah there was one scene where i was in hawaii last week it takes six hours i'll tell you why because there was a scene where i was running i was doing magnum i was running down the hallway and some guy grabs me from running this way so i'm running this way the camera's here and he throws me against the wall right and he goes full force i get kind of knocked back is it stunned it's kind of a stunt right and i have to now he's got a gun in my face like this oh oh and i haven't intercepts you right right and i had to take a phone from my jacket in like three seconds and put it in his [ __ ] pocket which is [ __ ] like i don't know where it is because it's one of those felty jackets oh no well you don't know where the opening is like one of those uniqlo finances [Laughter] i'mma gets a wall like this being lifted up yeah cut it's got to be quicker bob i know i can't find a [ __ ] pocket why do those shots have to be practical because they don't have to be practical what do you mean like they could cut away and do that separate okay exactly man yeah i i agree i am i'm on your side yeah it's like it's like get closer so that we don't have to do the run and the and the slam right it's just gonna bulk up the scene right and then i remember one time one of the um wardrobe people took his two fingers and opened the pocket up we did i don't like that so that i know so so i can get the [ __ ] the phone in quicker and the director goes no man put the pocket back against the thing right and i'm like i can't see it like he did that it's like you look in the pockets now being propped up oh no oh no that's when the prop guy gets see that's that's george i took why did you do that why did you do this and i got to put my hands can i put my hands in there and the guy is literally here and he's like chewing nicorette right here and he's like let's go come on make me proud so go ahead back to one background rolling and action wow wow that was good dude you you should you are you being real right yeah you you really good at like i guess it's pantomime are you good at pantomime that was i feel like it wasn't good and i feel like you're just trying to give me no that was really good all right so let's go higher everyone take a quick lunch and uh don't smoke before this what kind of oh yeah no with a warning too hybrid like out of what a bong you take a bong rip or i get six bong rips i did six bong rips right with tequila in the bong yeah right and a bunch of it went into your mouth yeah you like over filling the top yeah so i just six and i'm like then i have to do the things we're doing the insert today yeah yeah right yeah we gotta i mean as soon as you're moving around dude we got 86.77 so you got to come in right now and do it oh don't you hate when they do that uh yeah yeah yeah we have to do it in five minutes this monologue we're losing lives yeah so here we go all right exactly background rolling take five action what the [ __ ] he doing oh my god what the [ __ ] he doing what's wrong with his [ __ ] hands his wrist is broken what the [ __ ] is he what what kind of wine that's higher that's yeah that's rough winning that's rough that you're opening a box loose wrists no i have carpal tunnel on both hands you do no only only only inflamed when i take six bone yeah you did the normal so good with the carpal tunnel yeah yeah but um yeah i hate those i hate i would be hesitant so what i do a lot that i think drives people crazy is i'll go in and i'm like sorry i'm gonna do it again and i'll cut myself off even and then sometimes they'll be like don't cut yourself off because that was good and you cut yourself off and then i'm like well i'm double idiot then yeah you ever argue with a director about how good you are no just no no i feel like you would get an argument because you're so good like i was [ __ ] you were so good bobby you wouldn't believe it no i mean saying they give you a note that you don't agree with i don't argue no i do well like give an example of like an art well you don't have to do a real life one but no i wouldn't give a real life okay no no real life no you don't have don't go really happy well give a hypothetical hypothetical one but that's similar to the real life experience yes all right it's somewhere yeah don't use names so he goes this guy goes there was a line somebody had right and um i had a line afterwards but in my head i'm like it's so much funnier if if you say the line interrupting him so he has to stop sure it's in this specific thing so i do it one time that way during rehearsal and it gets a laugh from video village for sure oh yeah my choice all right action do it again director goes cut he comes up to me goes leave like a gap no what gap between the his line wait 20 seconds and then say your [ __ ] lie did he let you have one in the can where you no it wasn't even the can yet right it wasn't the candy it was no because i was a rehearsal when i did it so i go i'm telling you right now dude i this is how i talk oh man i i respect you big time your victim director okay thank you so much for the job no i'll just be like dude like i i'm telling you right now it's just funnier this way yeah and then i just didn't stop i think i just did it that way you didn't his way i didn't do it his way i feel like this person would a friend i know him what did he do okay did he he and he just gave up he just never said anything i promise you you would never do this oh yeah oh yeah yeah there's certain yeah yeah has he directed you in anything no no i haven't he's a screamer oh yeah no like he broke his soul screaming he broke my heart i broke your heart hey uh why is the sides in your hand uh oh i go i just he goes oh god we pay these [ __ ] actors all this [ __ ] money they can't [ __ ] memorize their wow right and you're just like i'll drop it like you guys are friends though yeah took a photo oh you guys are like best friends no this is what happened i was sitting there going i'm never gonna do the show again he was like sitting crying i was crying right that was me on a phone right there that he had just called me crying yeah yeah and he sits next to me and he's one of those white dudes that everything that comes out of his mouth is asian oh oh i did a tour in laos out of nowhere and you're just as an asian guy you have to you know me you have to kind of pander to it yeah you know right so you go oh yeah it's crazy love it yeah i mean like your people then they'll put you in it your people are just spiritual people you know what i mean you're like dude i watch regular [ __ ] like i know what's going on politically you can bring up anything you mean not like he's i remember the plane ride i had where this white guy goes he looks at me and he goes this random white guy goes my daughter loves hello kitty oh oh my god i didn't invent it it allows you i mean but people you know how white people sometimes bring up asian [ __ ] just to have a conversation with you that ever happen or is that yeah does it happen to you yeah yeah yeah yeah and then so he's one of those but that was like he's just his first line to me i'm gonna get something difficult yeah yeah the original oh wow yeah yeah he's a great actor i love him he's one of the best directors in the world in fact cut the whole thing out you're right you're absolutely right yeah there's a way to do it where we're doing it feels good to get it out just vent yeah sure yeah yeah yeah but for sure edit yeah i mean yeah yeah yeah the thing with with guys that like talk generally at you like that is like oh man did we not have a connection it's like all right like did you you hate me so easily yeah yeah treat me like maybe that's like i think that's also like a power dynamic too it's it's a way to to keep you at a certain like to to to to your roles right yeah yeah yeah yeah well it's like it's you know a lot of people are from the old school of hollywood yeah definitely and there were screamers back then oh yeah not as much like you don't see i've never seen a young director scream no you know they're using tight pants and they're wearing like you know what i mean aviation whatever they're wearing and um they're listening to the dirty projector that's i love the dirty project i love them yeah they're amazing they're from connect canada i don't know i think they are i love that album google it yeah i love the dirty projectors but um they're those guys yeah yeah cool they're cool yeah they know where the best coffee is yeah they all i've just moved into altadena yeah yeah yeah yeah oh yesterday a director told me she goes you're comic so i'm gonna talk to you in a different way because you guys just work differently oh okay and i'm like are you from jesus's clan i mean you're the best how how is how is it different the the way she talked she was she understood she's friends with margaret chow oh cool right so she's just like you know i've worked with margaret forces this is the way so it's like it feels like when a director understands that like you know i'm not i've never taken an acting class really as you can tell when you're watching yeah um yeah i just feel like um she's cool like she's young and cool and she's she's a different nation that's cool it's cool yeah yeah you know that's cool [Music] sleep for your back and the rest you guys helix sleep is one of those things where we use it in the house we love mattresses we like high quality mattresses uh my brother steve i've said this before but we gave him a helix sleep mattress and he just loves it every day he calls everyday calls and he says that he loves it and um helix sleep has a quiz that takes just two minutes to complete and matches your body type and sleep preferences to the perfect mattress for you why would you buy a mattress made for someone else with helix you're getting a mattress that you know will be perfect for the way you sleep for example i run hot i'm a side sleeper so i chose the midnight medium everybody is unique and helix knows that so they have several different mattress models to choose from they have soft medium and firm mattresses mattresses great for cooling you down if you sleep hot like me mattresses mattresses great for spinal alignment to prevent morning aches and pains and even a helix plus mattress for plus size sleepers i took the helix quiz and i was matched with a midnight mattress because i wanted something medium and i sleep on my side and bobby does too i do too we're both side sleepers if you're looking for a mattress you take the quiz you order the mattress that you're matched to and the mattress comes right to your door ship free you don't even need to go to the mattress store again guys 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unemployed job seekers and this issue is being worsened due to a mismatch of employers and qualified talent so employers like bobby said if you're having to go above and beyond to entice people to want to work for them ziprecruiter is for you yeah um zip recruiter uses a powerful technology and i love technology you know that i'm like trump i love technology to find and match the right candidates up with your job then it proactively presents these candidates to you you can easily review these recommended candidates and invite your top choices to apply for the job which encourages them to apply faster it's no wonder that ziprecruiter is the number one rated hiring site in the u.s based on g2 ratings let me ask you something i want i'm thinking about maybe getting an assistant mm-hmm i'm going to go through zipper coder i think you should you think i should you should do it yeah i'm excited go ahead wrap it and and right now you can try it for free at ziprecruiter.com belly you can try zip recruiter for free at this exclusive web address zip recruiter dot com slash ballet that's ziprecruiter.com b-e-l-l-y zip recruiter the smartest way to higher to higher people think they have low self-esteem i don't okay no i know who you are too you i know you too yeah right and it just you know it just makes me feel good that you're here i love you i wish i wish that i could honestly i i love hanging out with you bobby but i wish i could hang out i've never really hung out with kalylah do you have a number i well i have we talk on instagram a lot we talk about we should hang out oh yeah yeah have you seen oh my god you have not seen her dog and cat love on each other oh yeah they're better than she has better animals than us she shared it when she walked in here today sweetie it's our dream come true well you want cats and dogs to get along in this house well we have four dogs and three cats so the dogs sort of mingle amongst themselves and the cats do their own oh they don't they don't they're not lovey oh my god yeah oh yeah uh that makes me so jealous so cute wait wait wait wait wait yeah okay so our clans don't the clans don't mix here oh that's well they have room they have room to be on their own yeah no our animals are like you know let's let's suppose you know um our dogs are like italians and the cats are like syrian refugees i thought you were going to say greyhounds no you know they're walking through italy right trying to find a ho you know and they just they don't interact oh [ __ ] graham have you seen those italian grahams i've seen i know what a great italian they're called iggys they're always look nervous yeah yeah but they're best friends they're not best friends but they get along i think they don't understand each other but they tolerate each other because they don't want to they don't they don't want to be alone in the house i guess yeah so let me ask you something when you're out of the house are you driving around doing errands they're by themselves yes together yeah and do they do you have cameras inside the house just to see what they're up to i have yeah i have some like when i pet cube cameras yeah yeah when you're on the road do you think about them all the time i do yeah i do all i do is think about kalila first look at that head turn no they're one they're innocent it's like they don't know when you leave and stuff like that you know that's what they don't know what it's about they know well our dogs um they start to have anxiety when we pull out the suit suitcases yeah for sure they know they know yeah yeah and also i think the dogs think i'm a magician why like a traveling music no they just look at me and they go this guy is pure magic like when we lived in the apartment and we get on the third elevator right and you get on and then the door opens and we're on a different level and they used to look up to me like wow you have power and i used to like not go oh elevator i would be like yeah you know what i mean like you know i mean but like they think that you're magical they you feed them so you're they're a kind of life source i guess right sometimes i want to tell them like you know i'm pretty cool you know yeah yeah don't even understand what kind of food you give them um i give my cat was really good on like dry food for a while and he's very not picky but then i felt bad because i was feeding the dog wet food so now i feed him wet food and he'll scream at you if you don't put the wet food out oh really he's he's very vocal he's so smart but do you get high and [ __ ] or do because we get high-end [ __ ] well you do for sure yeah yeah yeah do you change up their up their food a lot i i don't i have a service that delivers like real food so i always mix that um actually i don't mix at all it's just real food all the time that's awesome do you find that they just don't get sick of that they don't because sometimes it's lamb sometimes it's this yeah so can we plan a a barbecue or something yeah i want dumbfounded there i need dumbfounded talking yeah let's do a korean barbecue yeah why can't we do that one day just have a korean day yeah you mean call other koreans right yeah and asians i mean you're not eight koreans like others you're half korean again should we open it up to other i'm not trying to take away your career okay you know that's not who i am right i enjoy the half of your no you you you're a korean unifier yeah thank you so much yeah yeah yeah but we we should have just one [ __ ] day don't you think yeah do you unite us yeah we're gonna invite john cho i'm sorry what was the last time you talked to john cho last week last week yeah yeah i love him sorry i love him you know who i love who laurie tension oh my gosh i love her i did a movie with her yeah right she's on your show she loves you she talks about you all the time i love her too and when i was at the show and when i would do performing in new york you would see your shows at gotham you would come into gotham and hang out with me she's really great you know what i also love about her and you have to admit this oh people like lori had it so much oh yeah for sure right yes like i when i'm in um hawaii i sometimes eat with amy hill i love honey and i always look at her i go god i i just i look up to you so much okay come on just eat your chicken and i always go no because the [ __ ] even the [ __ ] that i went through right i mean imagine what she went through in the 80s right asian accent you mean either some sort of [ __ ] coke clerk or no coke a coat clerk chicken clerk yeah sorry about that right or cause she did play the code clerk once on a in the movie and or laurie or amy no lori that she's right she was in glen gary glen ross great movie mickey she had mickey blue eyes right mickey blue eyes sea devil one of my favorite oh yeah that's right but you know she you know someone like laurie gets a line maybe nothing yeah someone right and it's like no she's as good as everyone else right but she doesn't get the opportunity and it's like i'm so happy that people like amy and why am i not what because this has to do with asians that you're not interested out of nowhere if we're talking about robert bradford or steve mcqueen you'd be [ __ ] i i i silly right now robert redford yeah yeah yeah bear care bear he's taking notes he was taking notes i are you sick of this [ __ ] squid game of [ __ ] [ __ ] man it's like why are you sticking that love it every [ __ ] white to come squid games they always say it they're my nails they're inspired by squid game let me see yeah those are awesome i mean it's a cultural phenomenon right yeah did you like it yeah it was pretty good it's good yeah you know why i liked it i'd never seen uh an asian male character with that many flaws that that didn't have any kind of redemption right which i think was a big theme of it um and also i like the way that they portray um degenerate gambling all right you don't often see you often see like vegas and like i'm pulling the casino tonight right but you don't know you don't see like how that really draining atm accounts and like screaming and it's like you're just in your own misery you know yeah but he does change in the movie which i liked where in the beginning he just is to me was unsympathetic in the sense that yeah i feel like he was weak and like kind of like well we can he gives into bad things yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah he steals from his mom gamble this you know they set him up good right they have no redemption in that perspective but still halfway during the movie he does become braver sure yeah and he becomes he changes more into kind of a man and i think that was always who he was right it was just you know his vices yeah his vices have gone in the way of like you it's like you're a care bear on the inside i think he was too but it's like life and his you know vices got in the way hmm oh interesting but even the way he dealt with his daughter in the beginning right well that's a man that's hiding that's a man that doesn't that knows he's without redemption like he yeah he's given up yeah but who do you think the worst person in the movie was the worst person in the in that in the show yeah the doctor what doctor that doctor his brother um the guy who was matched up with during the marbles with the when the indian guy uh yeah that's a piece of [ __ ] right there man i didn't like him yeah he turned out to be a piece of [ __ ] i i didn't finish it hmm yeah did you get to the marbles we're giving her all the energy three i got up to three three there are no marbles there's no marble i got up to the blue and the blue and the red paper no one dies what's [ __ ] about is you you have no right to even talk about the movie oh really i feel like i saw like twenty percent i know but i see i stopped myself when it gets to that part right right yeah you keep calling it a movie too which is kind of weird show yeah sorry you guys should watch t10 have you heard of that movie what is it t10 it's really i saw it last night it's crazy okay so t10 i want to watch something tonight yeah t10 it's really good it's um she like has sex with a car i don't know oh i'm into that oh it's so good t-i-t-a-n-e t-10 have you seen was it the call or the calling the call is korean movie remember the girl who um communicates with um the girl in the past oh that was good whoa wait hang on what's it called the call it's on netflix [ __ ] me up i think it's called the car but the movie that i highly recommend i'm going to stand and say it is it this one let me see i highly recommend everyone watching the movie malignant oh yeah that was crazy dude did you see it i had a weird thought that maybe we could talk about malignant today i want to talk about my lignin well yeah have you seen malignant i haven't seen it no but that was a oh nice oh cool okay everyone listen i'm very excited okay so so malignant is this did you know what was going to be about no that's why right oh but i just like why this surgical intro and then i was like that's why i know right right it's surgery so the first hour of the movie you're just like almost going i'm done like like i didn't like i thought it was hacky some of it i didn't know what was going on too well i feel like it was a lot of setup and i was like yeah what could this possibly be yeah right and then it's one of those movies when you find out what it is you go [Music] why what but also like you know like there's some movies that you loved growing up that give you no resolution still to this day no resolution and i feel like it gives you resolution and like more and like also like a punch in the face like have you ever wanted resolution like it gives it to you yeah yeah and there's a couple of scenes in there especially the prison scene right where when you realize that's when you realize you go what is this right right right you're right when they go off and it's like um i really highly recommend it it was on hbo max yeah yeah but it's all you can get on itunes you know a guy that opened up for you it was in that movie you're right this guy dan ramos dude that's one you know why i didn't watch it oh [ __ ] because this [ __ ] right here every time i would run into this [ __ ] he always talks he would he would go hey you know i'm in a big movie and i'd be like i know man he's like it's malignant dude you're in so many big movies dude who is you or you're gonna be i'm in one movie coming out that's a big move yeah i mean and you let me ask can i ask you this yes i'm gonna get on my knees okay oh okay can you tell when you're doing a movie if it's good no i i can't tell if it's good or bad me too yeah thank you thanks for participating but but but but i think that when something's really bad like really bad you could feel that more than you can feel when it's really good because sometimes the really good ones yeah yeah that's interesting to me so if it's really bad you kind of go oh i'm on a train wreck right now yeah but then you have to also measure your place on it right is it really bad and do i have enough say to actually change how bad it is and if i don't then i probably am not that important in this anyway so it's not gonna affect you it's not a big deal yeah yeah yeah but that i don't think that's really ever happened i've never been a person that i really cognizantly was like this is so bad oh that's cool have you oh yeah you cannot talk about it but i want to i'm gonna yeah i wasn't kicking it old school i feel like there are so many times you're like don't talk you don't talk about it you don't say names like no i am i just say the [ __ ] names yeah i was just kicking an old school breakdancing movie i played chili chill yeah right and you underestimate yourself there i love that movie people old school kicking it old school it was a breakdown it's a breakdown jamie kennedy and um i've said this before but they couldn't find a body dealer for me but they could find a filipino woman with my body so if you watch the movie and they see cutaway scenes of the body it's a filipino woman yeah they said we searched all of canada oh no we search all of canada we can't find look a male dancer oh man look at you dude yeah that's what i was in and the whole time i'm like i think this is bad the whole time every single day i'm like i'm having a blast yeah you're having fun you're in canada you're with your friend that's how i met michael rosenbaum right yeah but deep down inside you're just kind of going yeah i don't think this is good oh the experience of the movie versus like sometimes it turns out never sometimes ever matches it never matches because i remember going to the dressing room and michael me and michael rosenbob would like get naked yeah [ __ ] have a lot of fun oh okay that's fine you know and then like oh you go to meals right sure yeah yeah go get dinner you know it's fun right you're in a hotel check out that schnitzel place together yeah yeah right yeah like if you and i did a move let's say i did one of your movies yeah all right i know you're number one on the call sheet but not always no but if i was like fourth on the call sheet yeah we would probably have a weekend we would have a meal yeah we'd probably be on some like you know like remote area together and need to have a meal right or you you're one of those like hey i rented a boat no i'm not why not i don't rent i don't i don't you know what i'm what i don't thrive on the boats like that oh not a boat but like for instance if you and i did a movie in uh hungary for instance i would rent out the bottom section of a tgi friday's patio i don't rent boats so you're going to be like i would rent out an area right baby of a tgi fridays can i ask you this if we were in hungary and you were like i rented out tgi i have no poll in europe i can't run down [ __ ] in europe or you have money though right yeah but like how does that how do you know like i don't know i would probably go to you and go can you do it at nobu yeah would you do it with your bless if you came up to me and was like go make a bucket no i don't even know if i can make one for myself but with your blessing i'd be like bobby thinks i can yeah so i'll try yeah okay so that's going to happen i believe one day i'm going to have like a couple of lines in her one of her movies how fun would that be what about like a character with depth and like awesomeness yeah we'll do that [Laughter] do we have an unhelpful advice we do hopefully should we do plugs now first i like to do that first yeah don't forget it excuse me norah yes is there anything that you'd like to plug oh i thought you were going to do plugs for your show no i have nothing all right no i no i don't i oh well okay sure yeah i do i when is this coming out tomorrow oh okay uh i have a movie called swan song that's coming out on december 12th yeah december 12th on what medium apple tv plus that's huge yeah yeah um so december 12th apple [Laughter] oh [ __ ] yeah uh glenn close really good yes so good yeah dude glenn carlos nice yeah yes he seems nice yeah they're all they're all like very lovely yeah it's so funny that's great proud of you thanks to december 12th apple tv anything else december 17 december 17th i think so you had to do that huh yeah i'm sorry you had to do that thank you so check that out everyone she's a she's part of our family mm-hmm i love you guys go ahead unhopefully with bobby kalila and aquafina uh this is from a friend we'll call him m okay back in 2013 i was watching my cousin at the time he was maybe five he wanted to go outside and play so i went outside with him about 30 minutes later i was looking down at my phone and i look up and i see him with his pants down squatting taking a [ __ ] on the carport and the carport what's that i have no idea what that is is it like driveway garage carved garage right without the oh oh oh so like a a casita see i don't know what that is what the [ __ ] is it outdoor with the casino i couldn't help but laugh and i brought him aside and cleaned him up completely forgetting about the [ __ ] the next day his mom my aunt came home and asked me what i fed the dog i told her i fed her dog food for dinner why she told me because she because the dog took the biggest [ __ ] i've ever seen on the carport i still have yet today to tell her that it wasn't the dog but it doesn't matter how long has it been uh 2013. oh yeah who cares so basically it's if you do something like that should you still tell people he's holding hey this guy is holding that's not even his poop i feel like this guy should have taken a [ __ ] himself and then that's more baggage that's more baggage than yeah well here's the here's the general the the bigger question is this i understand what he's saying why are you no no what i'm saying is i know english in your life if you've committed like a transgression against somebody like and then you get away with it you already know if you tell them five years later do you come clean five years later oh that's hard because i had his ex-boyfriend do this yeah he cheated on me for a couple years while we were together in my 20s but we're friends now and he tells me stories about women that he's hooked up and i was like well when did this happen he was like oh yeah it was when i was with you oh my god [ __ ] you dude yeah so he doesn't have to do that but i mean and i don't really have a feeling about it i'm just saying do you come clean lying about your cousin whoever pooed on the side of the road whatever pooping in the car carport car whatever the carp or whatever it is right and then them going are you lying about like you know i mean i fed the dogs yeah right like five years later if you lied to me about that i would be like i don't give a [ __ ] well that was 2018 so i'm 21 now i know that far i wouldn't even remember it would you no but i feel like he's building it up in his head now maybe where it's it's becoming a different but no i i wouldn't tell anybody yeah if you get away with something and things are just going so that's what i mean thank you thank you they just leave it you don't need to like you know lying is good oh okay that's the point lying sometimes is it just ends it it's a good you know i mean let's move on from this lie sure right sometimes when you lie it just stays that way are you like a like a little white lie or like something the big one is like i didn't know bobby was a lawyer right it's a lie you told me yeah yeah whatever right it doesn't matter bibs are okay you told people you were a lawyer yeah that's like a massive lie yeah yeah on kicking it old school he told people you know you lie like you know like carport we just learned it oh that's all i've seen a car before a casita yeah look up a casita c-a-s i like that like this that's a cathedral like a gas station kind of i like that it's similar wow so we learned a new word today too yeah that's a nice word yeah good times and um [Laughter] really good times i i learned a card yeah um listen yes i um i was really looking forward to this i was too and i got on the plane i came here and um it's better than it ever i ever expected it goods good and i just really love you a lot and you know good luck on your things and um check out the swan movie yes swan song that's what i said i love you bobby thank you for having me yeah and why don't we do it please let's just do a slow clap you know we've never done no let me start it okay i feel like white dudes love slow clowns i'm trying to get excited he's like his hands are falling at the mouth let's go i can hear a white dude right so tell me if i'm doing it right because you know about slow cap collapse right so let's give nora round plus i started oh you started i think you come in the third one is this like a wave then i'm in the third one well that's okay this is not slow yeah that's gonna be very long [Applause] pretty good it's like they're realizing their own emotions through the class right you're like yeah yeah yeah i did want to do this earlier but i wasn't feeling okay thank you so thank you so much for being here thank you thanks laura i love you it was amazing what's up everybody my name is dwayne higgins and i'm singing the tiger belly song this week uh thank you to everybody that watched and commented nice things and thank you to bobby kalila and the whole crew for electing me as one of the winners so you can check out the music my music at dwayne higgins.com follow me on instagram and all that good stuff uh thanks guys i might get a little sexual with you nick foreign [Music] me [Music] hi [Music] [Music] um [Music] foreign [Music] [Music] you

Channel: TigerBelly

Views: 511,329

Keywords: tiger belly, tigerbelly, bobby lee, podcast, khalyla, tgrbly, all things comedy, mad tv, stand up, tpw, tkats, bad friends, comedy podcast, Bobby lee andrew santino, tigerbelly clips, bobby lee podcast, awkwafina, nora, nora from queens, hot ones, comedy central, song, shang-chi, marvel, golden globe, swan song, jimmy kimmel live, snl, monologue, netflix is a joke, between two ferns, zach galifianakis, brilliant idiots, dumbfoundead, fun with dumb

Id: pnbyO0Lx8QM

Length: 85min 54sec (5154 seconds)

Published: Thu Nov 11 2021