8 Games Where Every Possible Ending Was Bad, Sad or Both

like a Starfleet cadet facing the Kobayashi Maru simulation sometimes in a video game you find yourself in a no-win situation where the only outcome is a bad one unlike that cheater cheater pumpkin eater james t kirk however you can't sneak leave reprogram the game to give you a better ending you've just got to play the game make your choice and live with the consequences no matter how bleak join us now as we ponder the games that had multiple endings sure but all of those endings were bad or sad or bad and sad now watch out for spoilers for these whole bunch of games hey Captain Walker where does it go that situation sir mission critical no sir and take it up the chain sergeant Roger that lieutenant Adams I hate you sergeant what's your status statuses chafed sir you say chafe sergeant yes sir a local airport insurgency has infiltrated the u.s. zone designated as my pants sir shut up jackass I don't like sand it's rough and coarse and irritating and it gets everywhere yet I still probably like it more than captain Martin Walker protagonist to spec ops the line the game is inspired by the Joseph Conrad novel heart of darkness and takes place in a ruined Dubai that's been destroyed by sandstorms there Walker and his squad are trying to find John Conrad a US Army colonel who along with his unit the damned 33rd had defied orders and declared martial law in the city the only one who can hear me and the commander of an American evacuation force we're here to rescue you but first 33rd will pay for what they've done despite being a third person cover based shooter starring a marine with a shaved head and a nolan north voice though SpecOps the line is a lot more complex than it first appears before long Walker is suffering from hallucinations committing atrocities and well committing more atrocities because of the hallucinations that's white phosphorus I know what it is you've seemed to shoot us you know why not have his choice Go Go there's always a choice sure there's always a choice and I choose to use white phosphorus what could possibly go wrong oh right my war crimes anyway when you finally catch up to Conrad the whole reason you stayed in Dubai in the first place it quickly becomes apparent that he's not really in a state to be rescued or indeed do anything beyond possibly being used as a Halloween decoration it seems that reports of my survival then greatly exaggerated the game actually has four different endings based on what you do next and let's just say that none of them involve Walker and his pals going for ice cream sundaes firstly you're given the option to shoot Conrad or to shoot yourself as you might imagine shooting yourself ends the game five on the other hand shooting Conrad sets up three more potential gloomy endings in one you are killed by a Patrol sent to pick you up and in another you go to town on them with an automatic shotgun then stay in Dubai to rule it as some kind of mad shotgun King gentlemen welcome to Dubai the final ending and the one the developers would probably consider the good ending is the one in which Walker surrenders to the patrol after which he's taken away to answer for his crimes with his psyche in tatters and the deaths of thousands of people on his conscience that's your good ending SpecOps the lion and even heart of darkness had a better ending than that I mean once I wrote it in there in sharpie seemed to lead into the heart of an immense darkness and then they all went for ice cream sundaes the end see Joseph Conrad knew how to end a story of madness and obsession well hello friends and fans it's beyond awesome to have you guys all back this year first off I gotta say I am super excited to welcome all my pals back to the annual Blackwood winter getaway until dawn is an interactive horror movie in which young adults are menaced on a mountain by supernatural cannibal monsters also one of them is mr. robot off of mr. robot what I've got admit I have not seen the show does he at least play a robot no what I really want to spend some quality time with each and every one of you and just share some moments that we'll never forget in the tradition of horror movies but with the added layer of interactivity and a decision tree more complicated than the song by Avril Lavigne the menaced young adults will live or die according to how you play - sorry the baddest possible ending it may not surprise you to learn is one in which all of the unlucky young people die horribly by various horrible means worst winter vacation ever yet until Dawn's best ending in which everyone survives and you get the trophy called they all live still manages to undercut its own ostensibly happy ending in this ending the playable characters stay alive until the credits roll but stick around and you'll learn that even though poor Josh Washington played by Ramy Malik aka him of mr. robot doesn't have his skull crushed by his monster sister yeah that even though not that and even though josh has survived he's gotten stuck underground where he's lost his mind and become a gross cannibal monster himself eating human heads and whatnot one survivor as a wise woman once sang so much for my happy ending a wise wise one this is my storm I caused this I caused all the branch of philosophy known as ethics has a thought experiment very famous one called the trolley problem and it's not just when you're in the supermarket and your shopping cart has a wonky wheel so there's a tram and it's going to run over and kill five people tied to the track ahead or you can pull a lever to divert the tram but then it's going to run over one person tied to the other track the main philosophical question is one who the heck is tying up all these poor people and two which is the more ethical choice time-traveling teen drama life is strange complexify the problem further still by substituting the five tied up people with the population of a small Oregonian town and the one tied up person with the girl you probably loved most in the whole world there's so many more people in Arcadia Bay who should live way more than me you're not trading me maybe you've just been delaying my real destiny life is strange life is sucky more like your ultimate choice between sacrificing Arcadia Bay to a supernatural storm or letting Chloe price get killed in a bathroom gives rise to two possible endings neither of which is the upbeat feel-good finale it sounds like obviously there are good philosophical arguments on both sides but whatever your personal moral philosophy we can all agree screw Arcadia Bay save Chloe keep that gun away from me psycho ah I see you're from the classical utilitarianism school of thought you number-crunching morality robot better deal with that boy in Star Wars The Force Unleashed Darth Vader secret apprentice star killer has a lot of difficult decisions to make such as how many times to spin a struggling stormtrooper before flinging them off into space or what color lightsaber to impale a stormtrooper wins or how many times to catch a falling stormtrooper before finally letting the fault of a dare to be honest they're mostly about awesome ways to kill stormtroopers by the end of the game after Starkiller has come around to the rebellions way of thinking the leaders of this fledgling movement find themselves at the mercy of Emperor Palpatine who has an attractive offer for them he will be interrogated tortured you will give me the names of your friends and then you will die cool cool sounds cool pal fee just give me a few minutes to think about it yeah luckily Starkiller shows up to save the day Rex up Darth Vader and then is offered a choice choose the way of the light side and attack the Emperor or choose the way of the dark side and join the Emperor who it must be pointed out is currently electrocuting a kindly old man and laughing about it surprise choosing the dark side means you get a bad ending in which the emperor throws a spaceship at Starkiller and he dies like an idiot choose the light side however and star killer gets exploded by Force Lightning and dies like an idiot [Music] he is dead then it's now more powerful than ever is he though Palpatine seems pretty unpowered to me hey star killer you suck see true in this ending star killer sacrifice makes him a martyr for the Rebel Alliance and they adopt his symbol as their own but that doesn't help old star killer does it what were they being dead no in fact none of the rebels seem to remember him at all further down the line it's the bloody first order who go around naming bases after him but all I'm saying little gratitude wouldn't go amiss doc do you Poe Dameron hey can you give me on the rooftop of that mall you gotta be kidding me it's a truth universally acknowledged that no piece of zombie fiction ever has a happy ending so we weren't holding out much hope for any of Dead Rising six possible finales but it's equally true that in video games doing everything you're told to do in your objectives list Nets you the best ending right them's the rules that's why I'm dead writing we dutifully solved all the cases talk to Isabella at 10 a.m. and then got Frank to the heliport in time for a ride out of there and presumably a 100 G achievement called Mike you are the best I will accept a 50 G achievement called Mike you are great a pretty magnanimous guy but instead of a triumphant return to civilization and a Pulitzer Prize for photography Frank's helicopter pilot buddy ed gets bitten by a zombie in crashes and Frank gets himself infected with the zombie virus you then have to fight your way through overtime mode and Frank finishes of the game screaming at the sky while surrounded by an overwhelming crowd of the undead that's right Frank let it all out I didn't get my achievement either so we're both having a bad day believe it or not that's the canonical true ending of Dead Rising even though it's more of a downer than at all Radiohead mixtape the rest of them are variations on Frank failing to escape ed to get him bitten by zombies and in one particularly grim turn of events the entire mole exploding even ending be the least immediately horrifying ending in which you escaped on a helicopter with a group of survivors has a sucker punch lying in wait just as you're busy high-fiving yourself it's revealed that although you've escaped Lumbee outbreaks occur in cities across America presumably killing hundreds of thousands of people you know normally when you kill that many people in a video game you get some kind of fine it's because if you're looking for a game with a broad spectrum of downer endings because I don't know you hate happiness look no further than Drakengard your weirdo this ps2 fantasy role-playing game comes correct with not one not two but five possible endings each of which is more surreal than salvador dali's stress dreams after a five-course cheese dinner the night before his important algebra exam [Music] will you forgive me now the endings a hugely diverse United only by their surrealism and the share teams of what we like to call the three DS of Drakengard that's death disaster and the degree to which the human race is doomed oh wait that's for the four DS of Drakengard nevermind the point is Drakengard is an epic saga in which the principal characters battled to save humanity from annihilation by the otherworldly malevolent beings known as the Watchers and at the end of this epic saga depending on which ending you achieve you will be rewarded with either a whole bunch of dragons out to destroy humanity also your dragon friend is dead or a whole bunch of angel monsters out to destroy humanity also your sister is dead [Music] or a whole bunch of whatever in the name of sweet boss baby is going on here does become one my beautiful team that is some dead ass attack on Titan nightmare fuel right there is what that is what God can help us now after say nothing of the truly left field down attending in which came and his dragon packed powell angeles are walked through a dimensional portal into modern actual real world tokyo where they defeat the queen beast but also a little bit set in motion what will be an eventual cataclysm in our modern actual real world also they get blown up by fighter jets [Applause] when the only ending that even approaches a good ending involves a tiny child begging to be killed and then your dragon friend sacrifices itself while you cry [Music] No then we're confident when we say that Drakengard just doesn't do happily ever after because like that's for Disney and also Max and Chloe in my correct version of life is strange don't at me the deficit crisis before you find the 11th hour is an excellent game for people who enjoy doing puzzles while a jerk is sarcastic to them panda oh looks like someone found this clue too much to bear yeah I'm not a fan in the game you play as coal Denning an investigative reporter whose girlfriend goes missing in a spooky old mansion you set off to rescue her a process which involves doing a ton of sliding block puzzles and solving weird riddles until you finally confront the owner of the house Henry staff who is hosting a game show in the Attic despite having been dead for over 50 years that's when you're given the game's final choice there are three women to choose from robbing the girlfriend you came to the mansion to rescue Samantha the mysterious woman who's been helping you out and feeding you clues along the way or Murray who is evil but only wearing a bra you can see the dilemma here let's see what's behind door number one [Applause] sweet obviously choosing Murray gives you a bad ending although I don't think anyone was prepared for her to turn into staff mid sex and then chow down on Carl's ribs because what sure you wouldn't like a bite [Music] it's you choosing Samantha on the other hand means that you escape the house but it then burns down with Robin inside and she dies [Music] so logic dictates that the best ending is going to be the one where we pick Robin the whole reason we came here in the first place right guess again in this ending Karl is found dead in a river a few weeks later the body of TV reporter Karl Denning was found floating in the Hudson River today what's the message here eleven pair because I'm having a real hard time puzzling it out stuck are we if only you had the brains yeah all right we're done here wait you're leaving for flying to Havana tonight it's already begun mute we'll take it from here your family will be here in an hour as far as parenting role models go came from Canaan Lynch dead men is somewhere near the bottom right next to the McCallister's from home alone and the McCallister's from home alone too two separate occasions you guys Kane's involvement with the criminal underworld is the reason his wife gets executed by mobsters right in front of their daughter Jenny no wait let me talk to them and then later in the game again because of Keynes life of crime Jenny gets kidnapped and taken to the Venezuelan jungle which is just lousy with guerilla warfare at this time of year in more proof of parental failure when you finally catch up with her it turns out that Jenny has quite the potty mouth yet another reason why you should probably hand in your world's greatest dad mug Kay rescue Jenny and you're presented with two options for an ending neither of which involves cake in party poppers one option is to head back into the fray with Jenny in an attempt to rescue your comrades Shelley and rific and escape by boat the other is to dishonourably Digital pals and steal a helicopter with Jenny could get her out now I don't know them they all know the risks attempt to rescue your men and you're signing up for yet more shooting as you advance towards the church where they're holed up when you finally get there though Hrithik is already dead don't shoot it's me you've been huh I guess it wasn't short for terrific after all unless it was terrifically full of bullets were still as you leave Shelley appears to be exploded Jenny will be shot and Cain finishes the game cradling his dead or dying daughter in the boat as Lynch does his very best to offer words of sympathy so be ok you choose the other ending though where Cain escapes from the helicopter and Jenny will definitely survive but she'll be so disgusted by her dad's cowardice and betrayal of his comrades that she'll probably never speak to him again teenagers a cane I'm just kidding you're a terrible father there you go those were the games that had multiple endings sure but all of those endings were bad sad bad and sad miserable just why did you even bother this was real downer and I now I'm depressed so I think the only thing to do is go and cheer myself up with this video from outside Xbox which is about the weird-ass their field endings that made us go wait what at the end of the game which is better than miserable right and then this one from outside extra which is about the heartbreaks in video games that we still haven't gotten over but somehow like heroes we will talk to you about them because talk about something

Channel: outsidexbox

Views: 1,860,346

Rating: 4.890801 out of 5

Keywords: funny, funny moments, funny list, star wars the force unleashed, star wars the force unleashed funny, until dawn endings, the force unleashed endings, life is strange, life is strange endings, bad ending, worst endings, best endings, sad ending, downer ending, saddest endings, good ending, spec ops the line endings, dead rising endings, drakengard endings, dead rising, drakengard, kane and lynch dead men, 11th hour endings, list, top 10, top 7, 7 things, top 5, countdown

Id: _Z0wUJi8I5I

Length: 21min 39sec (1299 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 29 2018