70th Emmy Awards: Opening Monologue

[Music] please welcome your hosts Colin Jost and Michael che [Applause] [Music] whoa good evening hello everyone welcome to the 70th Primetime Emmy Awards I'm Colin Jost I'm Michael che yeah thank you thank you you know it is an honor to be here sharing this night with the many many talented and creative people in Hollywood who haven't been caught yet this year this year the audience is allowed to drink in their seats hope you're excited about that yeah because the one thing Hollywood needs right now is people losing their inhibitions out of work function we just want to say a quick hello to the thousands of you here in the audience tonight and to the hundreds watching at home hi Silver Lining Senior Center you know who's not what my mother's not watching what well she said she doesn't like watching white award shows because you guys don't think Jesus enough that's true the only people the only white people that thank Jesus are Republicans and X crackheads I don't even know this the first Emmys were held back in 1949 things were very different back then gas was 17 cents a gallon a new home cost seven thousand dollars and we all agreed that Nazis were bad in fact actually Carlin you'll like this our network NBC has the most nominations of any broadcast networks right yeah right yeah which is kind of like being the sexiest person on life support it's it's not great still not looking great no Netflix of course has the most nominations tonight right that's right and if you're a network executive that's the scariest thing you can possibly hear except maybe sir Ronan Farrow is on line one yeah you don't want that call you know of course there are so many incredible nominees here tonight the credible nominees black-ish is nominated that's right black-ish is also how I've been asked to behave tonight see how that goes you see how that go one of our favorite shows this is us is nominated for Best Drama great that's right Milo is here he plays Jack on the show it's the next season if this is us we'll explore Jack's experiences in Vietnam this was in response to viewers who wrote in and said sadder please that's true speaking of sad The Handmaid's Tale is nominated that's right yes I don't know if you've seen it but The Handmaid's Tale takes place in an imaginary future where an entire group of people are violently forced to work and make babies against their will it's what black people call history yeah it's its roots for white women that's what it hurt fruits would bond it there were several dramatic rescues for TV shows this summer Brooklyn nine-nine was canceled by Fox but picked up by NBC Last Man Standing was canceled by ABC and then picked up by Fox right which is good that's right and Roseanne was cancelled by herself but picked up by white nationalists all she's had a rough year yeah you know I heard Roseanne is actually moving to Israel Wow I mean damn how messed up is your life when you have to go to the Middle East just to get peace of mind by the way congratulations to Laurie Metcalf yeah yes Wow that's incredible you know how great an actress you have to be to get nominated for Roseanne now that's like nominating a cop for a Beatty award doesn't happen weird and television obviously has more choices than ever before this year Netflix will spend eight billion dollars on programming they now have 700 original series which makes me realize it just makes me realize that the show I pitched them must have really sucked it did I mean it's like being turned down for a CBS rewards card also while you guys are here how is Netflix getting all that money it's like nine dollars a month and everybody I know is sharing the same account Netflix is like that Instagram model that's always in Dubai and you're like yeah but what did you really do the Obama's now even have their own production deal at Netflix and my dream is that the only thing they produce is their own version of The Apprentice and it gets way higher ratings things are getting better but as we all know TV has always had a diversity problem you know I mean can you believe they did 15 seasons of ER without one Filipino nurse have you been to a hospital that's crazy even on a great show like Cheers I mean she's I love cheese but you're telling me they made a show about an all-white sports bar in 1980s Boston and not one black dude walked in saw everybody then walked right back out at me I would have I would have I would have certainly there's even more diversity coming to TV there's a Latino magnum p.i there's going to be a black Samantha and a reboot of bewitched but it's going to get balanced out it's going to get balanced out by an all-white reboot of Atlanta called 15 miles outside of Atlanta focuses it focuses on white women who called the police on the cast of Atlanta well it's not perfect it's not perfect but TV has come a long way in the past 70 years I think that's what you're trying to say right that's right and with the amazing contributions from everyone in this room tonight I think we can keep television going for another five six years tops tops but let's have fun tonight let's start giving out some trophies you guys excited [Applause]

Channel: Television Academy

Views: 2,270,633

Rating: 3.752099 out of 5

Keywords: 70th Emmys, Emmy Awards, Show, 70th Emmy Awards Show, Backstage LIVE!, opening monologue, michael che, colin jost, saturday night live, live feed, nbc, comedy, emmys, game of thrones, marvelous mrs. maisel, 2018, hosts, weekend update

Id: egk6ReRS3wU

Length: 7min 50sec (470 seconds)

Published: Mon Sep 17 2018