LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
SCARLETT JOHANSSON! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪♪♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
OH, IT IS SO GREAT TO BE BACK HOSTING "SNL" FOR THE SIXTH
TIME. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
YOU KNOW, THE SIXTH TIME IS EVEN MORE EXCITING THAN THE FIFTH
BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT WORRIED ANYMORE.
I MEAN, IF THE SHOW IS BAD, WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO DO?
FIRE MY FIANCE? [ LAUGHTER ]
OH, NO, WHAT WILL WE DO WITHOUT HIS PAYCHECK?
[ LAUGHTER ] I'M ALSO SO HAPPY TO BE HERE
BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAS TIME. AND I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU BUT I
STILL BELIEVE IN THE MAGIC OF CHRISTMAS.
>> WELL, THAT'S GOOD TO HEAR, SCARLET.
[ LAUGHTER ] ♪♪♪
>> OH MY GOD, IT'S TWEEZELE! MY OLD ELF ON THE SHELF.
>> THAT'S RIGHT. IT'S ME AND I HEAR YOU'VE BEEN A
VERY GOOD GIRL THIS YEAR. >> WELL, I CERTAINLY TRIED MY
BEST. THAT'S FOR SURE.
>> I'M SURE SANTA WOULD WANT TO --
♪♪♪ WELL -- WHAT IS THIS?
>> HEY, HEY -- WHAT'S HAPPENING? OH, NO, PHANTOMS.
[ LAUGHTER ] FROM "THE AVENGERS" MOVIE I WAS
IN. NOT THE LAST ONE.
THE ONE BEFORE THAT. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> NO, NO! [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> OH, MY GOD. MIKEY.
>> I THOUGHT THAT WAS ALEX. >> IT'S THE SAME DAMN THING.
[ LAUGHTER ] I THINK HE RETURNED AND FOUND
THE INFINITY STONE. >> THIS IS LIKE THE BACK-UP
MONOLOGUE FROM THE LAST TIME YOU HOSTED OR SOMETHING?
>> YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE. >> NO.
YOU NEED ME. WHO WILL PLAY THE DUMB IDIOT!
>> THANK GOD YOU'RE OKAY. I THINK SANTA TOOK PETE.
>> NO, IT'S JUST ONE OF THOSE WEEKS WHEN PETE DOESN'T SHOW UP.
>> WOW, FIRST ASIAN CAST MEMBER. NOW YOU'RE DUSTING ME?
TWITTER WILL EAT YOU ALIVE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> BOWENT TOO? I HAVE TO STOP THIS.
>> SCARLETT. >> OH, MY GOD, MICHAEL.
OH, THANK GOD YOU'RE SAFE. BUT IF YOU'RE HERE, THAT MUST
MEAN THAT THAT COLIN IS -- >> HEY.
>> OH, HEY. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> I THOUGHT YOU'D BE MORE, LIKE, RELIEVED TO SEE ME.
>> I AM. REALLY, GREAT.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> DOESN'T FEEL GREAT.
>> WELL, I'M SORRY. IT'S JUST, LIKE, I'M FOCUSED ON
THANOS RIGHT NOW. LET'S JUST TALK ABOUT THIS
LATER, OKAY? >> YEAH, I'MA JUST HEAD OUT.
LET Y'ALL BE -- [ LAUGHTER ]
NATASHA! [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
♪♪♪ >> IF YOU GONNA STOP THANOS, YOU
GONNA NEED MY HELP. [ LAUGHTER ]
SAM JACKSON, I MEAN, WAIT, WHAT'S YOUR NAME IN THE MOVIE
AGAIN IN? >> OH MY GOD, IT'S NICK FURY.
HE RUNS S.H.I.E.L.D. DID YOU NOT WATCH THE MOVIE?
>> WHY IS THANOS DOING THIS? >> IT'S NOT THANOS THIS TIME.
SOMEBODY ELSE HAS GOT THANOS'S GLOVE.
♪♪♪ [ LAUGHTER ]
>> THIS IS INSANE. I HAVE TO STOP GETTING HIGH AND
BUYING THINGS ON EBAY. HALF THE PEOPLE ARE HIGH
>> HEY, MAN. HE WAS HOLDING YOU BACK.
THE DUDE COULD BARELY RAP. >> PETE, STOP THIS MADNESS AT
ONCE. >> YEAH PETE, I TOLD HIM NOT TO
DO IT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'M SORRY, BUT I HAD TO. I WAS BORED.
>> WHERE DID THEY DISAPPEAR TO? >> PEACOCK.
IT'S NBC'S NEW STREAMING SERVICE.
♪♪♪ [ LAUGHTER ]
PEACOCK. COMEDY STARTS HERE.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> WELL CAN YOU PLEASE BRING HIM
BACK? PLEASE PETE?
PRETTY PLEASE FOR CHRISTMAS? >> PLEASE, PLEASE.
>> OKAY, FINE. I'LL BRING THEM BACK.
>> NO, NO, NO. NO, PETE, YOU GOTTA SNAP IT.
>> OH. >> OKAY.
I DIDN'T SEE THE MOVIE. >> OKAY.
MERRY CHRISTMAS, PETE! >> OH, MERRY CHRISTMAS!
>> SO PETE, TAKING A FEW SHOWS OFF, HUH?
>> YEAH. YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU'VE BEEN HERE
AS LONG AS I HAVE, YOU CAN DO THAT.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> REALLY?
GOOD TO KNOW. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> WELL, IT'S GREAT TO HAVE YOU ALL BACK.
I JUST WANT TO SAY, THIS PLACE MEANS SO MUCH TO ME.
I MET THE LOVE OF MY LIFE HERE. MERRY CHRISTMAS.
WE GET A GREAT SHOW. NIALL HORAN IS HERE.
SO STICK AROUND. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
I love her voice so much. She should do those guided sleep/meditation things.