Will Ferrell’s Full Speech As George W. Bush At #NotTheWHCD | Full Frontal on TBS

[Applause] please stand for the 43rd President of the United States George W Bush how do you likely now yeah the prodigal son has returned I don't know what that means but I know it's positive it's very prodigal quick quick presidential update I'm doing quite well thank you history's proven to be kinder to me than many of you thought yeah for the I miss you too the longest time I was considered the worst president of all time that has changed yeah and it only took 100 days I needed I needed eight years a catastrophic flood a war built on a lie an economic disaster the new guy needed 100 days is is now widely considered the worst president of all time I come in second I'm fine by that no one remembers second place I don't I don't even remember who played the New England Patriots and last year's Super Bowl you know yeah I am the martin van buren of the 21st century so yeah I'm doing just fine I'll be honest I've never liked you guys in the press or our relationship was sometimes strained contentious one might even say it was prodigal you know now I'm just I'm just speaking the truth you know you guys were always sneak up on me with got you questions like why are we going to war got you why did you not respond to Hurricane Katrina got you what is your middle name gotcha I just wish someone had told me that all you have to say is fake news over and over again you know that could be your answer for everything yeah I got to be honest I hated walking into that press room you know Sam Donaldson David Gregory Jake Tapper I called him tap shoes you guys remember Helen Thomas sometimes Helen Thomas scared the out of me until someone pointed out that she had been dead since 1954 yeah no it's true it's true Cokie Roberts used to wheel her stiff corpse into the press room and then through some kind of muscle memory her mouth would move with hateful bitter questions yeah somewhat fascinating if you thought about you know I'll give her this though Helen Thomas asked several questions does a dead woman than any man at foxnews can ask today that is for the men left standing over there heck they're firing anchors over there faster than you can say hey hot chocolate it's a pretty good line no look I never liked the press but I took my loss like every other president the new guy has thin skin he's he's what they call a snow flake you know you got those sensitive kids on our college campuses who can't listen to arguments that aren't their own we call them snowflakes he's one of those guys he can't handle the heat he's a weak man he can't even sit in the White House no he runs down to us he runs down to merrill ago merrill ago sounds like a name from a Tom Clancy novel the hunt for merrill ago that night in the steamy sultry air of the Mara logger Club the president speared a sumptuous and beautiful slice of chocolate cake and brought it to his all-knowing lips he chewed it with steely reserve and then with the delicious and really wonderful chocolate cake still in his mouth he turned to the Chinese president who was also enjoying his wonderful dessert and said to him I have just launched 59 missiles at Arak or perhaps Syria wait wait wait wait hold on hold on that's not a Tom Clancy novel that really happened he fired a bunch of missiles at some cement while eating chocolate cake with the Chinese president hey you remember how he blacked out the windows in the room where the press was sitting down there at merrill ago so you guys couldn't see what he's up to for those of you too slow to notice that's what they call symbolism you learn about symbolism in journalism school journalism school is where you go so you can be a journalist or you could also just post angry racist tweets and hope Breitbart hires you you know that's another way it's another way to come yeah but I got I got to be honest with you I don't know why anyone would become a journalist now it's like it's like being on the Titanic in this room you know Washington Post's New York Times Boston Herald the iceberg is coming and you guys are hanging onto your journalistic integrity playing the violin as a ship goes down you should do what they're doing over there at Fox & Friends those guys are dressing up like women and children and stealing the lifeboats of course of course there's no use crying about it apparently it's what the American people want or it's what a smaller percent of the American people want not not not most not the most American people just a smaller amount of people it's called democracy look it up you know hey did you all know I'm a painter now and yeah thank you I got a I got a whole book out called portraits encouraged it's a best-seller apparently I'm a better painter than a president I'm working on a new series I call it portraits in not courage and here's what I'm working on right now it is a it is a portrait of Donald Trump and as you can see I exhausted my palette of yellow and oranges I mean when you think about that man it's clear that he has an unnatural color it's a it's a strange hue it's not it's not really orange or yellow I mean I got a new name for that color they should just call it Mara Lago you know yeah so I I started painting his cabinet and here's a funny story I traveled to all the hobby lobby's in Texas Eastern Eastern New Mexico panhandle of Oklahoma and I still could not get my hands on enough white paint he he likes his cabinet rich and white of course I had I had : I had condi don't forget about my good friends Alberto Gonzales dude what's that I'm a friend of the Mexican people's I'm not a wall builder I clear brush he's starting to see the picture oh and here's a fashion update for you mr. Trump the tie stops at the belt okay a big long tie that goes past your mid thigh does not mean what you think it means it it means I don't know anything about fashion and I should not design my own ties so in a in summation the job of the presidency is difficult and as I looked back at my eight years in office and my time away from the presidency I've accumulated a broad depth of knowledge if I could distill it down to three words for this president it would be this eat a salad so thank you [Applause] [Music]

Channel: Samantha Bee

Views: 3,725,660

Keywords: Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, Full Frontal, Samantha Bee, Sam Bee, TBS, George W. Bush, Will Ferrell, Not the White House Correspondents' Dinner

Id: KZ7S-ymyaZ4

Length: 11min 41sec (701 seconds)

Published: Mon May 15 2017