What Is the Craziest Funeral You've Been To? (Part 2)

funeral director's attendees over at it what is the craziest crap you've seen go down at a funeral serious years ago there was this old man that we would give a lift to church he was very christian and was always willing to tell anybody how amazing and wonderful god is but he was also quite deaf so one day we were driving back from the service and discussing the sermon as we are driving we pass the cemetery and see that there is a funeral going down my dad mutters something along the lines of seems like people are dropping like flies these days this old man hears my dad muttering something and assumes that we are still on the topic of the sermon and gleefully exclaims isn't that just amazing fast forward a few years to this man's own funeral everybody is standing around the open grave people are sad and crying and sobbing and so on and so forth and my dear dad decides that it is the perfect place and time to tell everybody the story yeah subs of sadness turn to sobs of laughter with even the pastor smiling strange picture to see people laughing around an open grave not a funeral director but worked groundskeeping at one of the local cemeteries and now when lowering the casket into the vault it is held in place by straps on a lowering device we had a director who denied our mana requests for new straps as the ones we were using were bound to break at any time and these straps are not cheap we were basically told to make do with what we had and said the straps on hand were fine she is never out on the ground so this woman honestly has no freaking clue so we set up for an evening service using the same straps praying to dear lord zenia that these things to not tear family comes casket comes service is concluded now usually we don't let families stay after the service when lowering caskets into the ground just as a liability precautions but for some reason today this precaution was bypassed to sum it up nicely the straps tall like heck the casket falls over breaks open and this man's body goes tumbling into his grave gasps were had people fainted definitely crazy crap praying to dear lord zeno lol my friend's family is essentially our extended family his uncle passed away so we went to the funeral about midway through the pastor asked if anyone would like to say a few words some of his co-workers said a few things and then some woman no one knew got up but she starts talking about how nice of a man my friend's uncle was and how she enjoyed working for him she was his cleaning lady then she starts breaking down and saying how they were planning on eloping and she loved him there's a audible gasp my mother is stunned my friend is confused as to what he just heard his sister has her head in her hands and their mom says what in the absolute freak woman just walked away out of the church no one knows her name and as far as i know the family hasn't been able to contact her my friend's uncle was single his mom is the only one of three kids to get married i feel like i want it written into my will that i want something like this at my funeral don't let anyone know but my family just to screw with my surviving friends tl dr a fight broke out at the funeral and the child's casket was knocked over all heck broke loose in college i volunteered at an inner city ministry type thing back when i was religious well it was basically a glorified daycare for kids from the projects which were just up the road from my university these kids were bad as heckman but you definitely learned to love them sad part one of the kids third grader was killed during a drive-by type situation bullet came through the front door and struck the kid and he unfortunately did not make it crazy funeral part several of us college students were asked to attend the funeral six total a group of four went ahead of us and me and my friend wrote sperry play my friend and i got lost on the way and showed up a bit late as we are walking up the stairs of this massive church people start running out of the church doors screaming and crying a huge group of people in flashy suits bright dresses and big hats came flooding down the stairs my friend just look at each other like wtf and start looking for our friends within minutes the cops show up and literally corralled my friends and i into a storage closet the cop told us it was for our safety and one of them mentioned it was cause we were the only white people there pretty douchy we waited there until things calmed down basically during the funeral a fight broke out near the front and they actually knocked the casket over i'm told the kid fell out all heck broke loose i did not see this part happen however the other four college students were near the front when it happened it was awful and just a crazy experience overall that's some pet symmetry crap right there my uncle died and the ex druggy turned preacher giving the eulogy proceeded to make fun of him call him cheap and lazy and basically made light of him while we were all somber we were all in shock that the full wtf of it all didn't hit until well after sorry uncle i should have told that bastard to shut up i could have done a better job just winging it honestly i feel that some even most eulogies are lies people get up there and say things that aren't true i would rather hear what a jerk a person really was in life than hear a bunch of made-up lies both grandparents of my girlfriend at the time died within the same week and were supposed to be buried together so after the wake the hearse rolls up and the grieving family carries the two coffins outside the undertaker gives some instructions on how to get the coffins in the car the first coffin slides in no problem but there isn't enough room for the second one even though the undertaker had indeed measured and guaranteed that it would fit imagine standing in the street next to a hearse with a coffin sticking out of the back with the grieving and sobbing family-in-law waiting for another hearse to show up in the next hour my best friend died and his weed dealers [ __ ] mutuals showed up with gifts he admitted to me he only maintained contact with them for a weed and highly disliked them they suddenly called themselves his friends and brought pieces of his wreckage from the accident scene to give people tokens to remember him by walked around with chunks of burnt orange plastic i also nearly had to call the police on them when they tried to fight me for clearing the hospital room for 45 minutes so i could say my very last goodbye in private before i left the hospital and went home knowing they were turning life support off in a matter of hours i'm so sorry for your loss what freaking pieces of crap to dare do that i would have been beyond infuriated words can't even describe not a funeral director but soldier i once spent three months as honor guard for veterans who'd passed and requested a military funeral full dress uniform gun detail folding flags the whole nine yards after a particularly large funeral for a pillar of the community type individual a screaming match and scuffle broke out amongst family members when one of them decided to tell all assembled how the deceased had physically shamed him and his siblings for years and years a gun was retrieved from a car in the process though it was wrestled away before anything could happen the worst most bizarre part was the widow kept screaming now we had to go over this now in front of everybody why are you wearing family secrets like it was a known thing in the group they just didn't like acknowledging it in public apparently i saw a lot of tears doing that detail but those were easily the worst my family on my father's side is scottish and they all had purchased their plots before they died so they could be beside each other when my grandfather passed away we had the funeral and headed to the cemetery due to some mix-up they had actually dug up and prepared my grandfather's brother's plot sandy my grandpa's brother was very much alive and at the funeral we just noticed before they had placed his casket in the ground everyone had a good laugh and sandy even lay down on the ground beside it for some pictures it was a saturday morning in a large catholic church with multiple weddings and funerals on the weekend the funeral attendees turned around and looked up to the organ loft with confusion when the organist by mistake played here comes the bride instead of the funeral procession my family friend's mother was lowered into the grave by machine while everyone watched the machine broke and the coffin went on an angle and she rolled out my other family friend who was filming she was a big deal in a particular community decided now would be a good time for a close-up original family friend start to punch up with him videographer holds on to his camera and tries to freaking interview the guy punching him videographer tried to charge original family friend for the video costs he is no longer family friend i can't think of a single funeral i've been to where i thought you know i wish this was on video so i could relive it i attended a funeral in my hometown for a wheelchair-bound man whose brother had stabbed him and slit his throat their sister was an employee of mine so i felt that attending was lending my support after a brief eulogy was given for the man a family member said that the man's nieces were going to do a skit two girls about nine or ten years of age got up and reenacted the murder complete with stabbing and throat slitting while one flailed in a chair it was horrifying and beyond inappropriate i have never been so speechless in my life the nicest aunt i ever had died from falling down the stairs and becoming brain dead my uncle showed up to the funeral with his now wife and his son called the police to arrest him at the funeral for killing his mom he was never convicted this is probably only crazy to me my grandpa passed away a few years ago after long battle with cancer he was an atheist who loved to travel but because my grandma attends church regularly we had the funeral at her church the pastor who like most clergy lives on church grounds was late literally came running in through the doors during the family only gathering said pastor started the funeral by talking about how he knew my grandpa very well he didn't and it became increasingly obvious that he hadn't prepared for the funeral at all he stumbled over a bunch of names of places that my grandpa loved my grandma asked me to send her a list of my favorite memories of my grandpa i emailed them to her and it was basically just bullet points quick thoughts because i assumed that the pastor was going to weave them into his eulogy nope he printed off my email and read my list verbatim he even included the irish toast that i had in my freaking email signature may you be in heaven a full half hour before the devil knows you're dead that side of my family is not irish that level of unpreparedness on behalf of the pastor is appalling at my nana's funeral a family friend tried to lecture me about how wrong it was that i had gotten divorced while i was crying and my boyfriend was holding my hand bear in mind that this butthole is divorced and remarried i just got up and left and later at the graveside his grandchild was shrieking and dancing around he just let her do it then came over to say how good of an experience it was for the little monster i have never come closer to shoving someone into an open grave the sydney harbour incident reminded me of this my friend al had a brother who brother had died and been cremated he had stated that he wanted to have his ashes sprinkled from an airplane so al and his other brother bob rented an airplane and pilot flew over the mountains where the deceased wanted to have his ashes spread opened the door and opened the container a big mistake the slipstream caught a large part of the ashes and sucked them back into the airplane they started laughing and saying this effort doesn't want to get dropped from a plane after all turns out that there's a right way and a wrong way to dispose of ashes from an aircraft al and bob did it the wrong way the right way is to extend the four inches plastic tube pvc works well about four to five feet out of the airplane and pour the ashes into the end of the tube i'm half romani but in america we grill in the back of the funeral home and stay with the body for three days with no showering it's really strange to americans crap it's strange to me lots of drunk uncles the romani culture is unique but americans do weird crap all the time for a short time in my 20s i attended mortuary school i dropped out around the second semester a girl in my class who was super cool got involved with another guy in class who got her hooked on m he shot her in the back of the head one night high a few guys who were also in my class had to pick up her body because they were interning at a funeral home so that was fricked up i go to the funeral home there she is open casket after being shot in the back of the head it was like her face melted into the pillow it was horrendous she was a beautiful girl and this is how i remember her her parents were in prison so they were there in shackles accompanied by prison guards she was trying to go to school and get away from her family's crap it's so sad that she fell so quickly back into it by the way the bf got off on a drug charge no manslaughter charge murder nothing i hate my town at my mother's funeral which never should have happened my grandmother went behind everyone's backs and duped me into signing a consent sheet then stuck my aunt with the overdue bill six months later mom didn't want a funeral but i was trying to be understanding since the old cow claimed she was paying for it all my grandmother threw herself onto a funeral director and told everyone who she spoke to that she was the most affected by this no one is in as much pain as i am and that my mom was closest to me her daughter singular wasn't close to her like i was while i was standing in the dang room with my step sister who my mother had practically adopted after her own bio mom passed away then two of her boyfriends showed up and got into a fight with the one she brought to the funeral home they took it to the parking lot three elderly men with canes and glasses trying to beat each other up over a dried up old w it wasn't a good day at a funeral for a direct family member of mine great uncle it was a very solemn affair also very country a lot of sad johnny cash his favorite musician and everybody wore the standard dark morning clothes except one girl she decided that she would wear a bright yellow sundress with white polka dots yellow thongs flip-flops for americans and sunglasses with yellow handles also bright red lipstick it was winter overcast day so there's no way she can claim it was due to the weather now this might have been ignored if she was family but no she was the girlfriend of a second or third cousin of mine i almost smiled when it began to rain psh seriously wtf with the disrespect from some people row my family is unable to whisper they think that by yelling in a more breathy way it's a whisper so i was maybe 10 11 so i didn't go and great uncle joe died nice guy so my dad takes my grandmother to the catholic service which is a new thing for her so as my dad tells it they come by with incense and my grandmother in her wispy yells i small something burning so my dad just tries to shush her but to no avail don't shush emmy there's a fire so my dad then tries to explain to her that it's just incense and to calm down my grandmother then whispers oh hhh they shoulder burned old bay instead he loved crabs tl dr grandmom yells out fire in a church then comments on her bill's seafood choices at my grandfather's funeral my mother was standing over his casket and according to her something compelled her to pull up the sleeve of his suit and when she did she discovered a long line of bruises she checked his other arm and it was the same thing i don't want to get really into everything but basically as a result of this there was an investigation done and it was discovered at the nursing home my grandfather was and had been abusing not only him but also other patients there and that not only that but they had also stolen some of my grandfather's possessions from his room and off his body when he died namely his wedding ring it wasn't proven that they had caused his death but my mother completely believes they did when i was a freshman in high school one of my friends was decapitated in an awful car accident for some reason i won't judge his mom decided to have an open casket funeral against the advice of the funeral director it didn't even look like him and it was pretty traumatic you could tell they basically pieced his head face back together and cake makeup all over it his mom was so heartbroken and upset that she got in the casket with danny and the pallbearers had to remove her to shut the casket and carry him to the hearse i could never imagine losing my son but all her actions piled on top of my grief just made it a very upsetting disturbing service i also will never forget the funeral for one of my dear friends he was a guy in his mid 60s i'm 26 that was my husband's neighbor when we first started dating he was adopted and then rejected by his adopted family so he had zero family and my husband and i have always taken care of him and checked up on him he loved metal and would always party with us on the weekend before we had kids he always told us he wanted us to play some six feet under and drink 40s at his funeral so that's what we did only five people showed up to his funeral including me and my husband so we had a little party in the graveyard and drank 40s reminiscing on all the fun we'd had with him over the last eight years not your typical funeral but it's what jon would have wanted it's not really that crazy but i once witnessed someone accidentally hit a catholic priest not the priest who officiated with a paper airplane granted it was the reception afterward and the priest was a relative of the family he threw the paper airplane back at the thrower my dad has nine siblings and he's the third to youngest this means that by the time he was born his oldest sister and brother were already adults and about to marry their respective fiances naturally since my dad is 60 his older siblings have started to pass away well half the siblings hate the other half and many of their children have carried on the vendettas the hate stems from i crap you not siblings not disliking other siblings so my aunt dorothy was the first to pass about five years ago and certain siblings were told they weren't welcome then my uncle chuck passed and a fight nearly broke out between my dad and his older brother simply because my dad had said the corner brickwork on the building they had the funeral and was finished very sloppy turns out the brother he said this to was the one whose company did the brickwork then that sibling passed away and i'm serious when i say specific siblings and the family of those siblings were actually sent letters telling them that they weren't welcome at the funeral on top of that the family hired security to man the doors of the funeral home and make sure none of the siblings came it was a mess tldr my dad's family is a freaking mess especially at funerals not necessarily crazy but it was certainly amusing to me in order to do this story justice i have to explain my mom mum was a genius with words and wit smart and quick and devious in a fun way she would go out of her way to embarrass people and put them on the spot but would always manage to make it pleasant and fun and was eager to take it as often as she dished it out my mom passed away from cancer almost a year ago now at her funeral it was this big beautiful home that was freezing cold people were in and out the big doors and this place just wasn't holding any heat there was roomy sitting area that i kept going to sit and relax i was about a month and a half pregnant and feeling super gross people kept commenting about how cold it was and in the spirit of mom i couldn't help myself my reply was always a dead pan they're keeping it cold cause mom will melt obviously i'm supposed to be sad and grieving so people were unsure if they should laugh or not many pokes at mom were made that day especially during the speeches making fun of her for wearing the same pajamas for literally days at a time because she worked from home her brothers and sister talked about all the mean things they did to her and she did to them when they were kids but the whole funeral and the raging party afterwards was wildly inappropriate and completely hilarious and tons of fun it was exactly what mom would have wanted at my dad's funeral about 500 people showed up i was exhausted after greeting them all into the reception and quite frankly starving and wanting a drink well after getting a plate of food and setting it down on the table and went to the bar to get a drink and on my way back to the table i was stopped by my old neighbor's mom who was friends with my dad well in her mind she thought this would be the perfect opportunity to tell me that it was always hard to see me because my mom got pregnant with me around the same time she was pregnant but miscarried i had just gotten done burying my hero and yet she felt the need to confess and cry to me about a miscarriage she had 26 years ago worst part the caterer's thoughts my plate of food was left there for trash and threw it away so i didn't get to eat any real food for another two hours um well i've seen my aunt's funeral get turned into a quasi-pyramid scheme for my awful cousin's husband my aunt didn't want a funeral she had lung cancer for years and went through a lot of experimental treatments to try and stop it it only accelerated her demise she made her daughter promise not to have a funeral or else she vowed she'd get cremated or get a different power she dies now all the sudden there is a funeral cousin says that my aunt agreed finally to a funeral everyone is vaguely suspicious but attends the preacher that comes to speak doesn't know my aunt at all and it becomes very obvious he begins instead to talk about my cousin's husband a slum lord whose primary conversation topic is his stock portfolio we get to hear about what a great member of the church he is the church is a big cultish church known for sending specific people letters that they are going to heck what an amazing businessman and father it's beyond belief that he didn't get down on all fours and let my cousin's husband rail him from behind all the while my aunt's husband not the father of my cousin is being ignored and forced to sit in the corner this man kept her going for years helped her through her alcoholism and then cancer but the daughter didn't like him because like her mother he didn't spend his sundays in her church they acted like he wasn't there meanwhile the onstage presentation is still going on about how my cousin has apparently married the second coming of christ himself the only time to my aunt that we heard was she must have been truly blessed to have a man like this in her life my family left quickly only to give our sympathy to the grieving husband as soon as we got in the car my father began to get very upset he gathered his remaining brothers and sisters and they formally apologized to her husband a few days after the funeral he cannot look at either the cousin or her son-lord husband without getting irritated if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 20,895

Rating: 4.9026089 out of 5

Keywords: funeral, worst funeral ever, worst funerals, worst funeral moments, worst funeral stories, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh

Id: i5P-0VkTaiQ

Length: 24min 47sec (1487 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 02 2020