This Life Simulator Asks The Tough Questions - 3 Random Games

i don't understand how hard it is to be a baby you know you don't have any responsibilities you can poop anywhere i mean technically i can poop anywhere too but the dentist always gets mad [Music] what's up guys welcome to a breathtakingly unpredictable episode of three random games we're gonna start things off with a game called perfect vermin where i think you're supposed to hunt furniture using a sledgehammer i'm not entirely sure but if you're confused then that makes two of us oh okay seems like i've shown up to some kind of office building where i'm gonna have some tough questions to answer come monday morning listen it's not that big a deal okay my religion dictates that i don't believe in doors then they can't discriminate against me everything is gonna be fine now where is that furniture that i'm supposed to be hunting i say hunt but like in all reality do you hunt fish in a barrel knock knock anyone here why do we have two refrigerators that's kind of weird okay i'm not gonna jump to conclusions quite yet but yeah i know this seems strange but there's always the possibility that the co-worker came in for their shift and needed to refrigerate their elephant placenta i can't even imagine what kind of smell that would leave in the microwave oh there we go so what about you are you just a refrigerator interesting oh it's actually the middle of the night yeah it's 10 after 9. so i'm guessing no one has actually shown up to microwave their baby broth the ends so am i just supposed to look for furniture that seems out of place no you wouldn't expect two refrigerators for a cafeteria with two seeds so let's take a look around and see if anything else raises any red flags did i not smash you 90 sure i smashed you weird so the chairs are moving around you seem a little out of place okay it screamed in pain that's concerning why am i standing on its corpse there's three more things in here make that two more things i just don't know if i should be afraid or not like if i sit on one of them are they gonna be into it is it their kink or are they going to try to eat my butthole that could also be their kink not entirely sure hello oh i don't like chairs anymore and weird in here but we try over this way boss's office anything strange in here oh wait you're kind of out of mmm there we go okay chair brains delicious listen i have no sweet clue what the hell is going on right now but i'm not gonna stand here like some kind of mob boss and interrogate a couple of couches one of you better fess up otherwise i'm gonna pick the wrong one crap okay that's coming those are both coming out of my paycheck who would have guessed that they would have actually sprung for two couches hi return to the elevator so you can try this again did i not do a good job the first time i mean look at the smooshed chair oh return to the elevator stop wasting time okay uh were you not gonna introduce yourself interesting one door i can't get through okay i'm going back to the elevator what is this guy it seems to be really struggling to breathe um i get it i get it okay the elevator the elevator i'm good i'm i'm good we're in you happy now do you need me to exterminate more oh you actually do want me to exterminate more furniture okay do it again but better better how could i do it any better oh things have changed right they're a bunch of no smoking signs oh okay i've only got a little bit of time are they all the same yeah they're all the same okay perfect they hide poorly yeah you're telling me keep going i'm working on it i'm getting refrigerator juices in my eyes oh crap no they do move around they're changing a little bit all right yeah here we go and uh just one left yeah i know and it was over this way maybe possibly knock knock i feel like a mix of tim the tool man and that guy from the shining where was the last one i can't remember was it in the bathroom no we haven't been in the bathroom yet uh hello privacy concerns gotta get these doors down there's nothing weird in here come on there's gotta be so right right care brains got it this building has more chambers that need cleansing return to the elevator okay chambers that need cleansing what the hell does that mean i still have no idea what's going on this game is so weird i really like it okay are we good am i gonna be able to do my thing or nope you're back again no nonsense this time do your job what is my job exactly am i not being timed because that'd be great he doesn't look too good it's kind of like bleeding from his nose and around the ears a little bit okay different chamber different things to smush same idiots though crush them yes i i get it that that's kind of what i've been doing okay now you're gonna time me well i guess we're just delivering the pain train aren't we they do not feel pain keep going okay well whatever like i just said that uh is that another door behind a door keep looking it's waiting for you what's waiting for me ah crap come on that took longer than expected the next floors are contaminated dude i said you weren't looking good before but now you're looking extra not good a little pimply little bleedy tumery please return to the elevator oh okay okay just keep it together guy i'm tripping over body parts here here we go good yeah you just avoid popping on me you strange news reporter zit man i really hope this is going somewhere this floor's geometry has become uncooperative the geometry on the last floor is cooperative work quickly okay so we don't want to oh no we're just going to start the timer right away because we don't want to smash anything otherwise we'll start the timer um we got problems it seems like somebody pranked you everything is stuck to the ceiling or maybe i'm stuck to the ceiling who knows uh yeah you keep going yeah yeah i'm going okay calm down uh you great fridge oh my god this is so weird i never noticed the fridge screams out in pain too uh one more one more and it was crap i can never remember um hello no i don't know i could have swore i went to everything didn't i maybe there's something in the bathroom are they changing things on me i can't remember right it was you it's really easy to get twists turned upside down you can imagine why oh is that not fast enough someone's having a rough monday just go okay i would be happy to are we good oh oh we're not good we are not good are you still with us hello oh this one is real weird we need to do both at the same time okay i'm gonna start with the right because i remember the left a whole lot better so we're just gonna have to run around and hit anything that looks out of place because this one is a little bit more troubling okay well i don't think the toilet would be getting anything out of the fridge that definitely stands out uh right right we got a desk out of place and then we got the fake door behind the real door and nothing in there anything in here no we're good bathroom we got you and that's five okay so we're moving over to the left now got the bathroom right in front of us occupied oh no no no i don't think so so they're changing things up that was different we didn't have a toilet taking a poop before i would definitely remember that two more so it'd be this chair in the refrigerator right okay good and the fridge and then that's it are you proud of me dripping man [Music] uh what the hell i noticed this was changing they keep adding more signs every time we do a new room it's a lot of no smoking signs dude was smoking as well he had an ashtray next to him but i didn't think anything of it oh [Music] i always hated my mother i lived in terror of becoming like her oh crap i'm being timed wait what what horrible comedy that in the end i even die like her twisted by hate and desire i was cruel to you before your task was always impossible my hope was never fair i offer this as an explanation of my hate i offer no excuse do not worry yourself with the timer good i wasn't going to it is not for you i am being unborn and once again i am amused by the simple beauty of colors such abstract and fleeting things i will unknow them it was good to live it was good i was gonna ask him to talk a little faster but he's got bigger problems if only i had more time what okay it's like out now yeah definitely look out of this crazy nightmare knock knock i'm coming for you this is jabu jabu's belly all over again hello look out of this twisted nightmare thank you there's gotta be a door here somewhere perfe uh what oh i'm in a doctor's office now that's weird okay the time is the same and after nine whatever this is it needs to be quick mr spitz please sit down we need to discuss your test results there's been an accident a massacre downtown it's that will have to wait no this will wait there are people dying you are dying it's what we had feared the cancer has spread it's now what's happening in that office downtown can't wait it's what i'll be remembered for i have to go we'll treat this cancer it can wait if it was just in your pancreas alone it would be inoperable but it spread to your liver your lungs even your bones by our estimates you have four to six months you need to start putting your affairs in order i don't have time for this people need me this is the story of my career my life i can't ignore it you can't walk out of this office and have this all just go away no one will care about my death if i don't prove to them that i lived i've straight up got goosebumps right now that is so cool oh my god this was such a good game all of the monster furniture wasn't real it was cancer with our cancer because we were the news reporter guy we had to get down to the station and report on all these things happening even though we were currently fighting it and every time we would beat the clock there would be more of them or the clock would reset that's why we could see an ashtray of cigarettes next to us build up over time or more and more no smoking signs everywhere or like even the plants looked oddly like airways like it's just such a clever game i'm really impressed three random our next game is probably going to be a complete wet fart in comparison but it's called hyper life where you get to make every decision over the course of someone's life and you better believe we're going to make all the wrong ones starting with the name when i look at that little chubby unity asset baby i think of the name crystal methaney okay i don't actually know if we're playing as a girl or not but at the same time anyone who names their kid that probably can't tell you are very thirsty do you drink milk drink coke or drink coffee do you mean coke is in coca-cola or like do you know what my name is i i think we're gonna go with coffee let's drink coffee that gets us one heart and one money makes sense you know we're being more productive and we've got palpitations what's next what do you eat most milk mashed carrots or meat like human meat i guess we could go with red again i'm raising a small cannibal oh i'm not doing too well i've got a lot of money but i'm not healthy dad's phone asked the passcode oh crap wait what throw the phone to the ground apparently i'm a bad baby and time goes by so your decisions early on kind of dictate which paths you can take later in life i don't understand how hard it is to be a baby you know you don't have any responsibilities you can poop anywhere i mean technically i can poop anywhere too but the dentist always gets mads who do you love most mom dad or yourself oh clearly myself wait can i change lanes and get multiple things oh i'm gonna be a bit of a wishy-washy baby it seems like the red option is always the fun one i don't know if that's gonna hold up you put the square into the circle now let's go with circle we're going to be a bit of a dumb baby that's perfectly fine mom is trying to feed you eat spit or throw it at her oh yeah suck it mom i'm the favorite around here what's with all the negative hearts do you like hyper life i wouldn't go that far it's recess do we want to go to the playground stay in class or go to the library i think we're going to go to the playground but i want to try to get as many of these things as we can so hopefully i can continue to make decisions later in life i'm apparently becoming a bit of a genius you're at a birthday party kiss the birthday girl oh yeah throw cake at the birthday girl or get nervous and leave no we're gonna give her a smooch we've got a little girlfriend it's your birthday you wish for a pony super powers or a game console obviously we're not gonna get superpowers unless our parents are a radioactive spider not entirely impossible with the name crystal methane but [Music] there you go we've managed to at least get something good in our life oh no your best friend is playing with another boy break up with her be cool about it or cry for your mom i mean she's kind of frumpy looking but at the same time you never know if she's gonna grow up to be hot i'm gonna try to be cool about it i know i said i was gonna make all the wrong decisions which would mean cry for your mom but i kind of want to keep a relationship moving on in life oh crap pick a hobby for summer i'm gonna be a back gaming expert okay backgammon players don't get laid i wanna play guitar what happened i thought i was smart you've heard that today it's birthday of the girl you like we're going to ask her out dude can automatically ask her out this is perfect i'm making him a little playboy yeah she didn't grow up to be half bad i mean don't get me wrong her hair is definitely a little weird but at the same time i'm not gonna judge when i look like a bleach blonde artichoke there's a marathon next month but apparently i'm too lazy to run so we're just gonna run down the road of life anyway because why not come on give me an option there we go you're at a party with your girlfriend to be fun around her friends get bored and leave or chug i'll chug all the drink no no no actually i want to be fun i supposed to make all the wrong decisions but i want to keep her which department will you choose police academy i want to choose any or i will steal money instead okay yeah you know what we could try to be a bit of a thief that might not be too bad what's the worst that could happen we go to jail no i don't like your game okay maybe if i can get with my girl i'll think about it you're kicked out from high school and here i was thinking crystal methane was in his mid-20s technically he could be just keeps failing over and over and over again and they finally wanted to get rid of him or i guess it could have been the thieving do we whatever apologize to principal or attend an online school oh i kind of want to stay in school you know get a good job but at the same time i could also be a hobo so let's just whatever screw it we'll live free which department will you choose political science army or sports okay maybe we're going to end up being a bit of a gym teacher who doesn't like running you're at a party with your girlfriend be fun around her get bored and leave or chug all the drinks you know what we're going to chug all the drinks for once it's time we loosen up life is high as she's gone son of um i got an uneasy feeling i just can't shake do we close all of our social media accounts buy new clothes or change our hairstyle i could go with some new clothes now that i think about it his hair is looking a little bit better you know less artichokey but clothes remain the same screw your landlord wants you to leave the apartment pretend you're not home pretend you're his son or move back in with your wife no i want to pretend i'm his son wait what what do you mean dad you and your crush are alone in the elevator okay let's smirk and raise an eyebrow this time i just want to get some nookie in the elevator okay i grew old with the woman who i just met in the elevator decent would you donate money for children's education i'm poor as crap you're out of luck sorry i don't even have a children's education of my own oh come on now congrats you've made it this far without a penny i don't know how i manage it life is a mystery or i need a dollar dollar is all i need i think i am going crazy i'm just mumbling stuff you're thinking about adopting a child oh no i i don't have much energy no not interested in kids thanks would like to die alone still not really enjoying your game and i don't think there's gonna be much more of it random games once upon a time oh crap i'm sorry what i didn't even get the chance to say anything okay uh finally we have a game called no humanity which touts itself as being the hardest game ever made it straight up challenges people to last 15 seconds oh you've got to be kidding me i was 14 milliseconds away no okay i'm gonna challenge myself if i can last 15 seconds i'm gonna end the video i can do this this isn't that difficult right it's just advertising shenanigans like i grew up in a generation where this was entertainment bullet hells are perfectly normal and totally acceptable forms of entertainment and i am not going to lose my mind i'm starting to think this might not actually be the hardest game ever made it might just be complete and utter shenanigans like for all i know it's very well programmed to make it so that you can't actually win oh i i swear to god if they made it so that i got close to 15 seconds the first time to hook me and then they're just gonna keep pounding my ass over and over again this should not be fun this has absolutely no reason to be fun why is my mouse cursor not actually controlling hi what are you can you please go away no i don't like the things that you're doing please stop oh oh are we close i feel like we're close yes yes 15 seconds i would like to dedicate this victory to all of the women out there who haven't been able to find themselves a man who can last 15 seconds oh yeah you better recognize game give me those hundred coins you know what i think that's gonna be it for this episode of three random games guys i'm really happy that i got to make another video on this so soon no usually i have to wait weeks because i just can't find three games that i want to play but this one just kind of fell together and you guys have been doing a great job recommending games to me in the comments so as always be sure to keep that up leave a like on the video and then hopefully i'll be able to return for another one again soon but thanks for watching this video i hope you enjoyed and i'll see you next time [Music] you

Channel: CaptainSauce

Views: 2,177,571

Keywords: 3 random games, random games, 3 weird games, weird games, 3 free games, free games online, 3 free games online, perfect vermin, perfect vermin playthrough, perfect vermin gameplay, perfect vermin walkthrough, hyper life, hyper life game, hyper life gameplay, hyper life simulator, life simulator, life sim, dating simulator, dating sim, captainsauce, captain sauce

Id: fdnAMzMZ5zE

Length: 24min 48sec (1488 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 30 2020