the nine-nine having a collective meltdown for 8 minutes straight | Brooklyn Nine-Nine

still working on that afternoon almond i've been sucking on it so long it's smooth it's like sea glass you do you i'll get that for you ames [Music] oops butterfeet sorry about that sorry you bumbling son of a you just ruined my life i hope you get hit by a truck and a dog takes a dump on your face nothing to see here just a little hypoglycemic rage move along i'm so sorry hitchcock that's not me i'm never like that that's okay it's my fault i shouldn't bump your cashew cashew it was an almond you idiot i hope you drown in a tub i hope you have annual semester aneurysm after aneurysm don't make me hit you again um i'm building this dollhouse for my girls it's their birthday tomorrow i told my wife i'd get it done i had the same exact one when i was a kid mom charles is hogging my dollhouse grandma bought it for the both of us you want some help big man no i can do this it's just driving me a little crazy where do i fix the prince's tower boyle where do i fix it inside of the truck now boyle let it brother breathe better brother breathe sarge do we have any old t-shirts in here detectives ah captain did you come down here to take a look at the two best detectives you've ever worked with in action the two best detectives i've ever worked with are montez and dillman now you've never mentioned that before they were excellent i'm here because major crimes wants this case i was hoping to tell them you have some leads i overheard you mention a bill beau baggins should we bring him in well as much as i would love to meet him he is not a suspect okay so who is at this time no one but we are currently investigating no leads so you have nothing no nothing jake made a new best friend the vic's mom he promised her he'd solve the case that's a rookie mistake okay fine so maybe i'm not montana and dilbert montez and dillman and they would have remembered your name after one mention because we're memorable and they're not turned it around no right look captain rosa and i are gonna solve this case the answer is in this room we just have to focus and let the room speak to us isn't that right room when you talk to the room i lose even more confidence in you why oh wait i see it all right can you please just buy some more time anyway sir i feel like we've earned this fine we're fast you got it okay let's look at the scene like we're seeing it for the first time with fresh eyes vic was face down cast off splatter suggests upward knife slices no signs of forced entry laptop wallet keys were all there doesn't canota robbery wait a minute have we said this already are we just having the exact same conversation yep cool moving on windows and doors locked from the inside nobody in or out think think think oh the upstairs neighbor and his best friend drill through the ceiling murder atoms bleed all over the apartment then climb back up and seal the hole behind them negative we would have found construction debris and microscopic paint fibers the only thing that needs patching is that therium okay new idea we're gonna get inside the mind of the killer we eat the veggie wraps here we go oh this bastard oh man this is one twisted mother oh the pizza raw this guy is demented rosa okay all we have to do is figure out what kind of person can walk by cameras without being seen someone camouflaged as a wall unlikely harry potter and his invisibility club not a real person papa dude doesn't exist what about a looper situation not a looper it could totally be a looper situation a looper situation my least favorite hair oh my god rosa come here look at the blood spatter do you see what i see uh blood in the exact shape of dwayne the rock johnson peck peck dealt dealt big samoan tattoo rosa i think there's a major connection the number three is everywhere three people three types of blood and guess what the tax was on the veggie wraps three dollars and 19 cents but if you ignore the 19 then it's three okay you've lost your mind what who told you that was it room no it's the fact that you think the room has a voice and also you're working in your boxers what to beat the heat rosa to beat the heat we can't turn on the ac that's not crazy it's just smart jake i gave the case to major crimes what you can't do that i promised luanne yeah and now you can't let it go the scene's yours guys i'm sorry jake it's over okay rosa fine i'll leave come on room you left your pants i don't care you need to go to a hospital right now i don't want a birth happening around me it's way too gross i'm nowhere near giving birth i haven't even lost my mucus plug amy you need to get out of here i'm sorry my baby grosses you out rosa i'm excited to meet your baby when it's clean and wearing clothes and not blasting out of you like some half cuban jimmy neutron i'm just at the start of my labor your baby's coming it's still not active labor don't worry i'm not gonna have the baby here and get placenta all over your desk or whatever it is that you're afraid of wait is placenta something that can get all over actually technically you know what don't answer that i don't want to know it's behind one of these three doors why don't you pick one are you trying to monty hall me it's unbelievable i don't need monty hall ruining my place of work when monty hall has already ruined my home life come on sir the math thing isn't the problem night shift's keeping you and kevin apart you two just need a bone what did you say don't say it again i said you two need a bone how dare you detective diaz i am your superior officer bone what happens in my bedroom detective is none of your business bone don't ever speak to me like that again why did you do that dude just pen up now he knows problem solved [Music] just eating butter like a popsicle huh boyle yeah i know i'm spoiling myself but i'm depressed or have you forgotten that jake my best friend is in prison wait jake's in prison yeah he and rosa were praying for a bunch of bank robberies by lieutenant hawkins oh right and where's gina on maternity leave we were all at her baby shower last week okay and why am i bleeding i don't know hitchcock oh so you don't have all the answers i'm bleeding because my piece of crap son-in-law bit me look we all miss jake and rosa which is why we have to keep working the case there has to be some way to exonerate him i've been looking but i can't find anything and i don't know what to do i can't find anything and i don't know what to do title of your sex tape what is happening right now they caught hawkins trying to flee the country she confessed to everything and they let me out oh my god jake is it really you are you really here you know it baby but first i gotta hug my best friend welcome back peralta i just heard from the mayor to apologize for what happened to you they're sending you to disney world you and one male guest as long as i don't have to go on any of the scary rides i just go for the shows boil boil boil boil boil boil boil were you dreaming about jake again why didn't you wake me up i told you never to wake me up all right thanks okay here's what esther remembers about the night that she was around she was either at our restaurant or the movies or doing something else and she was either alone or with people the only thing she was absolutely sure of is that i seemed like a very nice boy which is not relevant to the case but did make me feel very good this is stupid it was 20 years ago no one remembers anything i'm beginning to think maybe we should climb out on that ledge and see how the perp got in i was gonna say give up what right after i came up with that incredible ledge thing terry we're ten stories up you can handle that sarge i'm not scared of heights okay i'm scared of bees i'm scared of snakes and i'm scared that the knicks might never be good again but i am not scared of heights we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die i would appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone you

Channel: Comedy Bites

Views: 454,953

Keywords: Comedy Bites, amy curses at hitchcock, amy santiago yells at hitchcock, amy screams at hitchcock, boyle eating butter brooklyn 99, boyles dream about jake b99, brooklyn 99 rosa hairstyles, brooklyn 99 unsolvable, brooklyn 99 unsolvable case jake and rosa, brooklyn nine-nine freak out, brooklyn nine-nine meltdown, holt bone, jakes window freak out b99, terry making a dollhouse b99, terrys dollhouse brooklyn 99

Id: cGbyLz9zhc0

Length: 8min 13sec (493 seconds)

Published: Wed May 18 2022