The Fight | Ben Stuart

[Music] thank you [Music] all right [Applause] hey it is great to see all of you uh man it is just fun to be back in Texas uh for me always a pleasure to be back my wife and I and our kids we live in Washington DC we love it but it's always good to come back to the great state of Texas I sat by a big cowboy on the flight uh just on the way here with his big hat on and we just talked about cattle and I was like I'm on my way to Texas uh and uh it was pretty awesome and I was on that plane maybe 30 minutes ago so we just got here and uh yeah it was it's been a crazy day but I am so happy to be in your presence because uh I love Timothy atique ta is one of my favorite people on the planet uh and it's been fun to I tell guys Ministry all the time the longer you're in it the better it gets you're going to see heartbreaking things people fall out people not make it but you're going to watch some people grow and develop and you're going to watch the best things about them get better and I love watching my friends have a wake of Blessing by behind him and ta is one of those people it's one of the great privileges of my life to be his friend and I love that man and I love this church some people I love more than anybody else uh in the world have become substantly better human beings as a result of getting involved in this community here so I love Watermark and I love being here and yeah so it's a wonderful place and uh I got you know engaged married in this town so a lot of fun memories about that too so what a place to be yeah mixed feelings on that one some people are like yeah good for you but all right uh when I was 24 years old I moved to Dallas Texas and uh when I moved here A buddy of mine Matt Chandler was just taken over to church called The Village and he would ask me to speak there uh periodically when they had like six Gatherings and I was like Matt like you have to like you lose your voice was brutal uh at the time but I remember one time he said I need to take a month off will you speak for a month and I said yes and as a 24 year old man I remember closing myself off in my little one-bedroom apartment in the Village Apartments and I want I want to write a Treatise on the spiritual life on on my experience of what it looked like practically to walk with God married with my Seminary experience of what I know about the word of God I wanted to put it all together in a way that was biblically accurate but accessible to humanity and I wrote this series and delivered it there and we just called it the fight and uh years later it became a book recently took 22 years some of you got a dream in your heart and you may just have to hold on to it for two decades uh but we put it out as a book called rest more probably should have called it the fight but um as ta and I were talking about what to do here we said man some of those things that I've had a chance to distill and live into and see to be really true of what does it really mean to walk with God I want to share some of those with you tonight so I've got a copy of your scriptures we're in James chapter one I want to read you a couple verses from James chapter one uh starting in verse 14. and if you're an Aggie in the room I don't know if there's any here oh look at that hey how about that I had to stop saying howdy in DC it scared and confused with the people uh so I ditched The Howdy but um uh if you if you're an Aggie you may have heard some of these ideas before they have been uh refined in my soul over two decades but I believe they're going to be helpful to you and I'm excited about what the Lord has for us tonight so James chapter 1 starting in verse 14 says this but each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire then desire when it's conceived gives birth to sin and sin when it's fully grown brings forth death do not be deceived my beloved Brothers every good gift and every perfect gift is from above coming down from the Father of Lights with whom there's no variation or Shadow due to change of his own will he brought us forth by the word of truth that we should be a kind of first fruits of his creatures well Lord I Thank you for these few minutes around your word and I pray you would help us understand what they mean understand what you're talking about and I pray God we wouldn't just understand it but we'd be affected by it that Lord I don't know what all our motivations are to show up in a place like this some of us want to turn over a new Leaf want to be a better person some of us just wanted to be with the person who brought us here and this was prerequisite to get with them and here we are I don't know what all brought us here but I know God there's an opportunity here to to hear the thoughts of The God Who Made Us and think your thoughts after you feel your feelings after you and maybe walk with you and I just want to ask you friend whether this is your normal deal or not if you're up for it just take a minute and you pray and talk to God and and just tell him teach me tonight please and then if you would please pray for me that the Lord would use me and I'd be helpful to you um well father we love you and we trust you use this time we pray in Jesus name amen well several years ago I had the opportunity to attend a Navy SEAL training exercise and I watched a group of Navy SEALs take down a building that was filled with enemies holding hostages uh and it was a simulation so they were using simunition rounds paintballs uh but they're fired out of real guns so they go fast and hard and hurt now it was my understanding I would be watching this exercise from the safety of an observation deck but I remember as I watched these seals kind of Stack Up on the door and begin to lay this dead cord their commanding officer who I was standing with motioned with me to walk with him and he starts walking towards the door and so as we walk towards it at one point he stops me he goes hey uh I wouldn't get any closer than this if I were you he said when they blow that door sometimes the handle can shoot off like a bullet I'd stay about right here I was like yeah fine like I wasn't planning on being this close but sure enough they blew the door open they went running in and then he hit me in the chest and went let's go and he went running into that doorway and I went running after him in jeans and a t-shirt and I remember as soon as I did two things struck me immediately metaphorically speaking the first thing was the chaos in the situation flashbang's going off smoke everywhere shots fired it was bedlam but the second thing that struck me beauty of their strategy they were aggressive but patient they were graceful but purposeful they would come to an open doorway and two of them with barely a nod would both swing out with their guns pointed in opposite directions to eliminate any hostiles while never being an open Target themselves and within seconds these seals had neutralized all the enemy rescued all hostages and taken an environment that had been chaotic and brought peace and I remember standing in the midst of that watching that and I thought now that's the Christian Life or it's supposed to be and you go what do you mean by that well I don't know what your spiritual background is but maybe you're here because you want to turn over a new Leaf you've decided I want to be a better person and the moment you decide to do that you realize that happens in the midst of the Winds of resistance that spirituality tends to play out in the context of adversity it's not easy that many of you have experienced that he said you know what I'm going to turn over a new leaf and then you live into Romans 7 the good I want to do I'm not doing it and the evil I want to stop doing I keep doing that and many of us If we're honest as we try maybe in a good faith effort to be more spiritual people we get discouraged by the situation we decided to be easier and you go I don't know what I meant by that like I would put my faith in Jesus show up at church and all of a sudden never struggle anymore and be happy all the time and fly around and sprinkle Jesus dust on the people like I don't know what I thought but you show up in places like this and many of you maybe grew up in churches where they would have testimonies and they would bring someone on stage and they'd walk up there and be like I just want you all to know I was addicted to every drug a human can create and then I put my faith in Jesus and never struggled again that addiction was entirely pulled up by the roots and everyone clapped you go that's amazing because God can do that and yet some of you you heard that and you go he uprooted your addictions he didn't even prune mine they're as robust as ever and for some of us let's be honest that you're not living a very purposeful or meaningful life because the low-grade hum of constant guilt and failure is just running in the background of your whole story and there's not a fire in your chest anymore already as a young person with so much in front of you you don't live with a passion because the wet blanket of failure is muting any passion you have for God or his purpose in your life and some of us If we're honest the situation has discouraged us it's a struggle it's adversity and let me tell you the data is in that Modern Life is not conducive to human flourishing and I don't need to go over and over about that that your generation has the dubious honor of being the most anxious and depressed generation on record that's not entirely your fault cultural forces have pressed in on you in strange ways in humanity but it's pushed onto you a discouragement a polarization in the media that breeds fear and uncertainty and anger a constant comparison with other people's pristine lives on a screen The Addictive nature of our interactions with new technology is constantly putting in front of us this polarization in comparison and the midst of that Onslaught the traditional buffers distress are gone and so addictions wait to take their place and many of us If we're honest we look at our lives and we're in a fight and if we're honest we're not winning and some of you hear that and you go Ben I know the Situation's hard I already knew all that maybe you're a Christian and you go I've heard all the Bible verses about the armor of God and the struggle and the battle I know spirituality is a struggle I'm I understand the Situation's hard then I just need a strategy I want to look more like the seals and less like you I'm going to look trained armed prepared successful I don't want to be running around in flip-flops going it's smoky in here and the strategies you've used thus far are not working I don't know about you but where I grew up uh we went to Camp every summer and we lived in Texas we drive to this camp in Mississippi and this Camp was wild I mean kids were smoking drinking 40s it was pretty crazy uh that's not an exaggeration but Thursday night man everybody got saved because after a couple weeks or days of staying up late and late nights little sleep malnutritious food had us all in this emotionally volatile state and the band would get us all stirred up and then the speaker would get up and he'd get us all fired up and by the end of the last night everyone was crying locking pinkies swaying singing friends are friends forever and then right at the emotional pitch it was open mic night and one after one we would get up there and say these big Promises of what we were gonna do for God that's what you all to know I'm never gonna sit again we'll be back I don't think he is he's had such a good week at Camp I think it's over for him next to be like so what you ought to know I'm going to tell the whole world about Christ New York he's prophesying right now and on and on we would go but there wasn't a one of us that two weeks later hadn't broken every promise and we would come Worship in here and then go home and be surrounded by our same addictions in our bedroom and go what's wrong with me this is for the pristine people things like this are for the pretty people they don't have an ugly life like me so maybe I won't be the worst human being you met but maybe I'm not going to live the life of purpose they keep trying to sell there and let me be honest with you for many of us you understand Life's a struggle it's a struggle and I don't want to give you a pump up speech it's hard but what I want to do and almost an unemotional way is to say if life is a struggle how do you struggle well so let's look at our situation and then I want to give you a strategy our situation is that it feels like a war because it is a war a pursuit of intimacy with the almighty occurs in the context of adversity it does it's interesting you look at the life of Jesus and as much as Jesus is presented as a lamb and a Shepherd he's also called a warrior that his arrival is pictured in the Bible as a landed Invasion John says in First John 3 8 the Son of God appeared for this purpose to destroy the works of the devil that Jesus arrived to destroy something the first mention of him is in Genesis 3 15 the seed of the woman will crush the head of the serpent the one who deceived us lied to us and heard us the whole river of tragedy flowing out of that Garden someone will come to destroy destroy the one who deceived us that's how he's pictured and Not only was Jesus's arrival on earth a landed Invasion it was a rescue operation his first sermon in Luke chapter four he stood up open the scroll and said I am here to Proclaim release to the captives he said I am here to set prisoners free watch me and he went to do damage on the kingdom of darkness one of my favorite passages about Jesus Ministries in Luke Chapter 11. Jesus was asked why are you here what are you here to do and he told the story he said imagine a strong man filled with armor it's got a bunch of gear no one will mess with him he said now imagine someone stronger beating him up stripping off his gear and stealing his things that's me I don't know if that's how you do evangelism with your friends tell me about Jesus he's like a big dude that beats up a guy and steals his stuff that's my king try that because that's Luke 11. Jesus said when a strong man fully armed guards his house his possessions are undisturbed but when someone's stronger than he attacks him and overpowers him he takes away from him all his armor on which he relied and distributes his plunder some of you why do you wonder why demons are always showing up in Jesus's Ministry one of my favorite moments is when there's a legion of demons and when they see Jesus they fall down shrieking and they say son of man if you come to torment us before the appointed time they knew a beating was coming they just thought he was early and yet you realize for some of you there are some things in your life that let's just be honest your addictions are stronger than you and your attempts at overcoming them have failed and some of you are here and you are right at the edge of discouragement in life and can I tell you something your addictions and failures are stronger than you but the good news is the stronger one is here he is stronger than what's stronger than you and he came as an invasion into the darkness and it was a rescue operation Hebrews 2 says since the children share in Flesh and Blood he likewise himself partook the same that through his death he might render powerless him who had power over death that is the devil and might set free those who through fear of death were subject to slavery all their lives he said I came to get you and if sin has led to condemnation and death I will take on your Humanity I will take on your death and I will set you free and transfer you out of the kingdom of darkness into the kingdom of the Beloved son that's the gospel not that you earn the smile of God it's not for sale but God came running into the darkness for you an invasion and a rescue operation the king of all Kings grabbing his subjects out of the kingdom of darkness and transferring you into His Marvelous Light that's the gospel you've switched kingdoms and I'm mentioning this because the best fighters are those who know they've been fought for it's the truth when you know someone fought for you you're willing to fight for yourself so many kids around the city give up on themselves because they never saw a parent an adult someone who cared fight for them and let me tell you something you have a king who fought for you and not only is it an invasion and a rescue operation it is an ongoing Mission C.S Lewis said enemy occupied territory that is what the world is Christianity is the story of how the rightful King has come you may say come in Disguise and he's inviting us all to take part in his great campaign of sabotage we are in a war but we're in a war where our King has won the decisive victory it's David and Goliath what happened when Goliath came when the fizzlesteins had invaded Israelite land and that massive giant stood over them what did the Israelites do they cowered in fear and shrunk before that great Giant and then David stepped forward and he looked weak he looked small but through his weakness what did he do he fought the one that terrified them and he said I will fight as your representative I will be literally the passage says the man in between I will step in and I will fight for you and my victory will be for you and he killed that giant and when he hit the dirt what did the Israelites do they shouted the war cry and they drove the Philistines out of their land and for you and me you what you need to First do is see it's the son of David Jesus Christ fought death for you fought condemnation for you you are not condemned your future is not despair it is Victory in Jesus you need to see the son of David beating death for you beating hell for you beating the Devil for you and when that falls to the ground all these little Philistines of lust fear and pride in your heart that are real now you can be empowered to drive them out of your heart because here's the thing I talk to so many people that when they come to Christ they go I thought some of these desires would go away I have some longings for some broken things I've got some addictions I just thought he would take away maybe Christianity doesn't work and I say no you've misread this thing you haven't been freed from the fight you've been freed for it before you were just a victim now you have the power to be a Victor that Jesus has won the decisive Victory there is no more condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus and yet he has allowed us to remain on this Earth and he's empowering us to beat back the darkness that once held you captive before you were just a victim now you have the chance to be a Victor in Jesus name it's Master and Commander I don't know if you've watched that movie starring Russell Crowe he and his team are tasked with taking out Napoleon's most feared frigate and at the end of the movie they disable his main mask with their cannons they board the ship they're fighting through all these French people down into the hold they break open the chains free all these prisoners huzzah which is how British people get excited and as they running out of these Prison Walls the hero has come defeated our enemy and set them free when the chains break and the doors open as they exit they reach handed a sword because you've been set free but not from the fight for it and that's the same with you and same with me it's an ongoing mission right and so for now those who are in Christ Jesus who've put their faith in him the spiritual life is one movement with two parts it's one movement with two parts it's a movement away from ways of thinking and ways of feeling and living that isolate us from intimacy with God and its movement towards ways of thinking and feeling and living that promote and intimacy with God that Christ purchased right old school theologians have a word for this they call this movement sanctification sanctifies build out the word holy which means set apart and you hear both parts in that set apart away from some things and set apart for some things right like my wife is Holy unto me right she's set apart from all the rest of you fools can't touch her set apart only to me right some of you have a coffee mug like this right it is Holy under your lips no Pagan lips May touch it right away in towards one movement two parts theologians had names for big names for these two pieces they call this mortification there are ways of thinking ways of feeling ways of living places I used to go things I used to do I now mortify I now kill I used to do them some of my friends still do but because of my allegiance to Jesus I don't live here anymore and they call this piece vivification there's other ways of thinking and ways of feeling and ways of living that I want to vivify I want to help bring to life if you're using gardening imagery this is the pulling up of weeds there's just ways of living that don't belong in my life anymore that cost too much I don't want them and their ways of living I want to promote they help me be the person I know I'm meant to be I want to nourish and feed and see those flourish if you're using dating image imagery this would be me cultivating intimacy with my wife like taking her on dates to restaurants without TVs so I can listen with my face right this would be not doing things that hurt our intimacy like yelling at her or dating other women I don't do these things I do these things right away and towards now before we move to our strategy let me be clear what I'm not saying is so this is the devil's side of the stage kids okay and that's the god side so you got to get on that God side everybody that's not what I'm saying because that makes it sound like God is over here waiting for you to get your crap together and that's not how it works the Bible says that he will never leave you and he'll never forsake you my wife's not going to leave me but but I can be standing physically right next to her but feel miles apart because we haven't done the work to cultivate the intimacy that we covenated with together do you see it so the fight of spirituality is a fight for unrestrained intimacy with the one who gave his life for you please for lust pursue righteousness along with those who call it to God under pure heart that's what Paul told young Timothy so what's our strategy well we got to understand that this does not happen in a vacuum that we have an enemy who hates our King and so he hates you so I remember my first day of middle school I was very excited I was going to ride the bus to school with my older brother and my older brother by every measure was endlessly cool and so I remember when we got on the bus he walked to the back of the bus and so I just started walking to the back of the bus because he's cool and sits in the back so I'm cool by proxy so off I go and I remember I'm walking to the back and as I do it this kid just stands up in front of me and puts his face right in my face and this is before I knew that this is what some guys do when they want to fight I just thought he had proximity issues like why are noses touching what's happening and uh I remember he looked at me and he was like are you cold Stewart's brother I said yeah he said I hate your brother it's like okay and what it turns out is this kid was a Marvin was a bully got some emotional needs met by picking on other kids there was just one problem he had decided to play football and my brother played football and there was one day at practice where my brother was running the ball and Marvin attempted to tackle him and my brother hit him so hard that Marvin went flying through the air and made uh squealing sounds like a piglet which one you're a bully kind of cramps your style right so fast forward back to the bus and he says I hate your brother and then he says so I hate you and then he put his finger on my face and said you look good with a cigarette burn here he pushed my face and then from behind him we heard my brother's voice go my red he kind of straightened up and he sat back down but as I walked by he said it's going to be a long Year little brother now let me ask you something why was he being mean to me I didn't do anything to him I didn't try to go to school because I looked like the one who shamed him that's why and if your Allegiance is to Jesus Christ the Bible says he made a public spectacle of the enemy triumphing over him stripping him naked when he stole his plunder which is you right and so you are not free from Temptation when you come to Christ you've got an even bigger Target on your back because the devil can't attack God in a frontal assault but he can twist the knife in him by coming after his kids and that's what he does that's where you are so let's talk about what he knows and what he does then we'll talk about what we know and what we do what he knows is he knows you specifically he knows your wiring he knows you have a mind to think with he knows you have a heart to feel with and you have a will a reasoning mechanism right inclinations and disinclinations and the ability to act a mind a heart and a body right and he knows your Tendencies the particular things you're into he's watched the film on you so what's his strategy what he wants is for you to take a willful step away from the intimacy with God and purpose in life you were created for why would you do that why would you participate in activities that are destructive to your soul and your purpose in the brief life you have on Earth why would you go along with that to get you to do this to walk away from the God who gave you everything he has to make that look attractive so he has to create an environment where he'll solicit thoughts to the mind to stir the affections so you'll enact the will that you will twist the knife in God by purposely taking a step away from the intimacy that Christ purchased right now some of you go well Ben where are you getting this from I'm getting it from the passage I read in James but each one is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire this environment is called temptation where I am lured that's my mind's attention and enticed that's my heart's affection and then when I enact the will and it brings forth sin and sin when it's fully grown brings forth death I arrive a place I'm never meant to be do you see it that's a strategy so I've said this many times ladies you might be getting ready for work or school in the morning and the thought will be solicited to your mind I'm single and as that thought crosses your mind and you engage it you go that is correct I am neither married nor currently dating anyone right but as that thought is continually solicited to your mind and it consults your affections your affections go but I want to be with someone I don't want to be alone and then a romantic song comes on and as it plays you're like I want to be with someone and then you start to drive to work and you see couples walking hand in hand and you see the animals going two by two and you go everyone's got someone but me and while you're in that moment where your attention is grabbed and affections are stirred you'll be propositioned with an idea and you'll date a loser he's Beneath You morally he is not interested in the interests of your king but you're so caught up you actually believe this is the best you can do and let me warn you ladies a whole cascading River of tragedies await you at the end of that decision or guys you'll be getting ready for bed at night and the thought will be solicited to your mind you should get online and look at naked things and as they can consult your affections you go negative things okay that's about it for you but notice in the passage it says each one is tempted right it's coming for all of us it's the height of insanity to say is not coming for you the best self knowledge you can have is no one if he's coming for us how does he get me when each one is tempted by his own lust his own desires he tailor makes them for us right he even calls them a lure what do you do with the lure if you want to catch a fish you want to Bob it in front of them and you don't just want to get their attention you want to grab their attention I mean break them off mid-conversation with their fish buddies and so maybe you present a frog and you swim in a long sideways so it looks wounded and delicious and you want to get his attention he's like anyway so I said well hello right and you don't just want to get his attention you want us to his affections and then when he enacts the will you got it he never even saw the hook never even crossed his mind there was a sentient being behind all this right and yet some of you may go a frog really that's what does it for you gross like that turns you on ooh like I don't even know how you can call yourself a real fish if you're tempted by that and that's okay he'll just get a different lure for you and you'll go ooh shiny and off you go right each one is tempted when he is lured by his own desire do you see it some of the best self knowledge you can have is how does he get me Sun Tzu wrote In The Art of War if you know your enemy and know yourself you need not fear the result of a hundred battles if you know neither your enemy nor yourself you will succumb to every battle Paul told young Timothy watch your life and your Doctrine closely watch your Doctrine know what you believe Timothy and watch your life be a student of you to save both yourself and your hearers there are people who look to you and some of you have been deeply hurt because someone you look to is an inspiration did not watch their life closely and they bought into this and it didn't just hurt their life it hurt you and don't make the mistake of thinking you don't influence other people this is how he gets us don't let shame block strategic thinking this is how the enemy works on you some of the best self-knowledge you can have is how does he get me so now what do we do let me give you three things quickly the first thing we do once we know this Jesus says in Matthew 26 41 watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation notice what he says he doesn't say watch and pray that you don't enter into sin willfully stepping away from intimacy with God he says if this the solicitation to the mind for the stirring of the affections always leads to this he says watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation if this leads to this let me get away from this number one is we eliminate the moment where is the moment he gets me so I remember I had a buddy tell me years ago that he had a friend come to him and tell him uh that he and his girl were in some trouble that uh they were getting in fights they were arguing a lot and those fights became shouting matches and they had become physical and my buddy told him you never put your hands on a wife in a hurtful way and said hey we need to come around you this needs to stop and but then he began to talk to the guy how does it happen start thinking about it you don't just start here and guys like I don't know it's like no think about it what's the path that leads you to this moment and as the guy thought he was like well you know it's like every Tuesday night we go to this bar and uh we're drinking there and she never wears as much clothes as I wanted to and she she knows it bothers me she does it anyway guys start hitting on her and she doesn't rebuff their advances like a one or two so I get mad that she gets mad and she makes a little comment and I make comments back and then it escalates and we get home and it escalates even more my friend said well look we need to surround you as a community to help you all we need to get this figured out there's some counseling that needs to be involved there's all this but let's just start with if this moment always leads to that moment maybe y'all don't need to go to that bar together anymore and he said it never crossed the guy's mind he was like but it's tequila Tuesday it's not worth sending over I'll talk to guys all the time that struggle with pornography and I absolutely hate it and when I say that I don't want you to get hit by a wave of Shame at all I hate porn because I love you and I see what it costs so many people I see what it's done to you and you were hit with a tsunami of it when you were kids it's not fair it's not right and you're the first generation that's had to deal with it the way you've had to it's not your fault it is your problem and you must fight and yet I'll talk to many guys that struggle with it and they'll come to me because they don't like what it's doing to them they don't like how it steals a sense of agency from their chest and I'll say well let's go to war on it man let's talk about it where does it get you when my bedroom late at night I got my phone by my bed and I can't stop like man Romans 16 says make no provision for the flesh you're putting the World Wide Web next to your head at your most vulnerable moment that's like an alcoholic pouring a glass of scotch every night and setting it on the nightstand and going now I'm not going to drink you it's a bad strategy I said so there's more that needs to happen usually you're going to this thing to obliterate bad feelings and we got to kind of deal with some of the emotional pain that leads you to that release there's deeper work to be done but maybe before we do that we just got to sober you up and so this leads to that eliminate this get your phone out of your bedroom and I'll talk to you guys that are like huh it's my alarm clock well then buy an alarm clock they practically give them away it's not worth sinning over you have agency over your technology don't be a victim to be the master of it you're the master of your life and so go to war on it and if you need to get radical Jesus said if your eye causes you to sin Puck your eye out now he wasn't saying actually Puck your eye out because you could lust with the other eye or if you pluck them both out you could lust just in your brain right but what he was saying is for some of you you're just not thinking creatively erratically enough one of my favorite passages is Hebrews where he's talking to people who are wrestling deeply with sin and the writer of Hebrew goes in your struggle against sin you haven't resisted to the point of shedding blood what an encouraging letter didn't blame yet you're like oh man we're like Martyrs we're but then he tells them but don't you know God is disciplining you because you're Sons and five times he calls them Sons Sons Sons Sons so many of you have such soft external barriers maybe you got an accountability group where you confess where you're struggling but by struggling you mean submit instantly ow okay that's not a struggle that's called instant submission and the reality is you've got soft boundaries but you're very hard on yourself and Hebrews is the opposite get harder boundaries make war but never for a minute just believe you are Sons Sons Sons Sons Sons you're dearly loved so let's fight that's the idea I eliminate the moment the second thing is I paddle Downstream before I engage in a particular act I look and see where it would lead me and is that a place I want to go that's James advice when desire is conceived it gives birth to sin and sin when it's fully grown brings forth death before I engage in an act let me see where it leads now the interesting thing about that is in Greek the language this was written in uh nouns have uh gender masculine feminine like Spanish and desire is a feminine word and so he's playing on this idea he's actually not using phishing imagery he's using sexual imagery he's saying if you Unite with desire if you jump in bed with desire she conceives and she gives birth to sin of rebellion against God and some of you hear that and you go well I don't I don't care if I'm sinning but sin is a feminine too and it says about Sin she brings forth death she has a baby too called Death it won't bring you the life you think it will and I counsel many people who engaged in activities they thought would bring life and it took far more than it gave and the reality is to look and see before I take part in a particular act let me look Downstream alcoholics call it thinking through the drink because there's that voice in your head that says you can just have one you can handle it and you have to go no no no no listen here I know where that one drink will lead it'll lead to drink too and drink three and drink four and I'll wake up tomorrow and someone will have to fill me in on some of the crazy things I did and you know what I just I'm not gonna go here so you look Downstream and see where it leads is that a place I want to be I used to preach for a friend he has a prayer Closet in his office a little closet where you pray before preaching and then as you're leaving all along the wall outside the door where newspaper clippings of ministers who had fallen out of ministry because of moral failure very morbid wall and I'm like yeah man is this like some sort of sick Fascination like what is this and then I realized no this isn't like some Like A Beautiful Mind like you know he just for him he knew in Ministry it is such an uh an exertion of energy emotionally and physically and sometimes when you're depleted you feel entitled and if you don't prioritize a healthy release in your life the enemy will always lead to a destructive one and he says I've seen too many ministers on this wall start to believe I need a break I need a break and the devil will present them an oasis of another woman's arms and they'll destroy their Ministry and their influence and their families he said so I put these pictures on the wall and there was one right at the eye level as you're walking out and it was it was circled a picture of a pastor who had been like doing some hardcore drugs and sleeping prostitutes but was still denying it when this photo was taken by the paparazzi so this paparazzi's taking photos of him and his wife in his car and you see on his face he's still spinning the story like they weren't my drugs you know like he's kind of got this happy face but my friend had circled his wife's face and wrote next to it look at her eyes because this guy was still trying to spin the story and play the game she couldn't hide it and you saw that she was just looking at nothing or a thousand miles away she didn't want to play the game anymore and my friend looked at that and said you know what I put this next to me because the devil will whisper that in this woman's arms I'll find life and I'm not coming after women women men we wrestle with this we're talking about desires here some desires that lead to death and he said I'm going to believe that getting into some of these illicit relationships will bring life to me but let me just look Downstream because sin looks less sexy in the cold light of day I don't want to use women like that and so before you jump in the boat listen to hear the crashing waterfall and say if I don't want to go there let me stop it up here I've never fought a lion but if I had to I want to fight a baby one it's better to fight it when it's little so don't let your desires get to full strength cut it off early look Downstream and the last one is you paddle Upstream trace it back why do we have these suicidal addictions to things we know are destructive what gives that River of our addictions their power well you've got a paddle upstream and that's what James says he says don't be deceived my dear beloved Brothers he said Downstream from temptation is destruction but upstring is deception there's a lie that leads us to engage in these activities that we think will be life enhancing but then notice what he does he doesn't say the LIE is these things won't give you the life you thought they will these things won't really work these relationships these drugs these ideas these aren't really going to work he doesn't say that he says don't be deceived every good and perfect gift comes down from your father above in whom there's no Shadow or shifting due to change he says the lie that launches a million sins is that God is not a good dad who will take care of you that if I don't think God will really meet my needs I will go to many broken places to have them met if I don't think he really cares about my love life then I'll just do it my own way and walk away from his because I don't trust his heart and so the lie that launches a million sins is that God is not a good dad who loves you and for many of you can I tell you a million sins will lose their power if you fight the battle here to know my beloved Brothers every good and perfect gift comes down from your father and then he says of his own will out of his Thelma his desire he brought you forth sin isn't the only one having babies he brought you forth by the word of his truth you heard the good news of Jesus you believed it and God brought you to life why because he wanted to because he loves you because he Delights in you I know for me and I've said this many times it's controversial in some circles I never really liked the song How He Loves Us and I used to wrestle with that why do I not like that song How He Loves this I'm like is it the Doppler effect the way we sing it well like it's not that like is it the lyrics no I'm not a tree and I thought no it's because they make you repeat it a bunch Oh How He Loves Us Oh How He Loves Me Oh How He Loves Me and as someone from a divorced home it sounds insulting not encouraging Oh How He Loves Me Oh How He Loves Me I used to not like it because theologically I'd get it right on a quiz that he loved me and been my heart I thought I was a disappointment then I remember when we had our first kid I would take like the two three a.m shift of holding this baby and I remember sitting in the quiet in my living room holding my little girl and suddenly feeling this pain in my chest like like my chest was caving in I was like oh my gosh like this is a heart attack I'm like what is this and I was like it's it's love for you and then I instantly filled the barriers of language I'm like I don't know how to express this feeling like no wording captures it the word love is too small to say I die for you is of course obvious there's no poem there's no song there's nothing that could wrap up this feeling that's bursting out of me for this little person and you couldn't understand it anyway because you're a baby you don't even speak English yet and then I'm like and you're not even doing anything you're not pitching in you're not complimenting my sermons you were nothing but noise and need but oh I wish there was some way for this little baby mind to understand what's exploding in your father's chest of how deeply and passionately and inexhaustibly I love you I remember in that moment I just felt like God did one of those little moves on me where he's like hey Ben do you think you're a better father than me you think you have a greater capacity to love your children than I have to love you and look victimization is powerful you can justify a lot of self-destructive behaviors if you buy the identity that you're a victim and some of us really have been hurt and you've been victimized but for me I had held on to some bitterness and anger and rage and I had to realize yeah all there's some sad things that happen but you know what I am dearly and profoundly loved by a father and I had to repent of an unbiblically low view of the love of God and that didn't take every addiction away but man it broke a lot of their power to go I wake up and I don't need to run to these to obliterate bad feelings I don't need to run to them to feel good I got you I got a king I got a father who loves me let me tell you something if you decided you hate me let's say you made that your goal summer 2023 Ben Stewart let me tell you how to do it you would grab the face of one of my little daughters man your disappointment to your dad gosh I mean like he's gonna love you because that's his thing and he loves everybody but you are so exhausting and it'd be better if you just left he's not going to say it but he doesn't really want you here just go go somewhere else go find love in somebody else's arms go find answers in some other book go go someplace else just get out of here you say that craziness to my child you will enact wrath in my heart and you need to understand that's what the enemy does to you don't be deceived my beloved Brothers every good and perfect gift comes from your father above and whom there's no Shadow or shifting due to change and of his own will he brought you forth by the word of Truth you fight hell with truth you fight Temptation with love no I got a father who loves me I get a king who gave his life for me and let me tell you the things of earth grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and his grace how was Jesus able to fight the devil in the desert because before Jesus had done a single miracle the heavens opened his father looked down and said you are my son and whom I'm well pleased that came first all the lame people were still lame all the blind people were still blind all the water was still water there was no wine basis you're my beloved Son fleeced and it was the the pleasure of his father that made it easy for him to resist the pressures of the desert and many of you your war against Temptation you'll need to get some friends you can confess to this is where he gets me this is the pattern I'm not going to shame myself I'm going to strategically say I got to eliminate this moment but for many of you the best thing you could do is say no the best defense is a good offense I'm going to get real good at this and enjoying the love of my king how did Romeo get rid of Rosalind how did Romeo get rid of Rosalind you don't remember Roslyn briefly go read Romeo and Juliet at the beginning Romeo is pining away over Roslyn oh Rosalind I love Roslyn I need Roslyn he's going on so much it annoys his buddy Benvolio and Benvolio says dude I'm gonna take you to a party tonight there's going to be like a hundred girls there hotter than Rosalind go read it that's a rough translation like the message version but it's there and Romeo says the All-Seeing sun has near met her match since first the world begun well there's no one hotter than Russell then he goes to the party and he sees Juliet and that night he sneaks into her yard and says but soft what light three under window breaks it is the East and Juliet is the sun arise Fair sun and kill the envious Moon which is already sick and pale with grief that thou her maid are far more fair than she Roslyn who and the way you dislodge a beautiful thing place it with a more beautiful thing that's how Augustine the greatest Christian thinker overcame his sexual addiction he says wow sweet it was to lose the things I had once so feared to lose you drove them from me and you took their place you were the true Sovereign Joy get good at lingering in his presence get good at lingering with his people orbit people who think about him to stir their heart for him so they can run after him I'm going to load my mind with the thoughts of God in my car I'm going to let it stir my affections for God on my bed and I'm going to run after him in a church at the porch in a community and it's going to set my heart free I'm on a different path not to earn his approval but because I have it because I got a father who loves me and a son who fought for me and I got a Life to Live chasing after him until I see his face so father thank you that you love us thank you that you're honest with us about our sin but you don't come to condemn us nobody in this room wants to condemn anybody in this room you are honest with us about Sin it promises life and gives you death and some of you you have been chasing Temptation calling it life but the truth is it has brought nothing but death into your life and Jesus Christ came not to condemn you but to save you to set you free some of you you need to put your faith in him tonight so if the stronger one is coming to break chains break mine if he's coming to forgive forgive me if you're transferring people into the kingdom of the beloved Son transfer me the first thing you need to do is say save your king warrior Jesus fight for me Rescue Me adopt me I'm yours and then let's just be honest with him about where we struggle he knows but it's so good for us to say I'm not going to shame myself that's the enemy's territory but let me just think strategically and go what do I think about that's a lie what do I entertain in my heart that is leading me places I know I don't need to go ask him to give you a vision of a friend you could confess to and say this is where he gets me [Music] and then I just want to challenge you family before you leave this room just take a minute and pray and go God would you give me a vision of what it would look like for me to be a young woman or a young man who runs with you who wakes up tomorrow and believes you love me who wakes up tomorrow and go I'm going to set my mind on the king I'm going to let my heart be stirred by the things that stir your heart I want to run with your people in the path of your laws because they set my heart free ask him to give you a vision of what that looks like maybe it's a you that it's hard to imagine but are you studying the word of God with other women and other men who love him people are helping you walk free making good decisions day by day looking up and saying I'm in a different place because of the grace of God ask him to give you a vision [Music] of a child in the arms of a father who dearly loves you and wants you to walk with him Lord minister to us encourage us where your children and we're grateful to them foreign

Channel: The Porch

Views: 21,781

Keywords: the, porch, dallas, watermark, community, church, christian, christianity, ministry, movement, fort, worth, faith, sermon, dating, truth, bible, advice, biblical, counsel, the porch, watermark community church, young adults, fort worth, todd wagner, the bible, ben stuart

Id: xtCm14VqFGk

Length: 51min 21sec (3081 seconds)

Published: Wed Jun 07 2023