The Best of Sir Humphrey from Series 1 | Yes, Minister | BBC Comedy Greats

awesome Arnold what news that speech is causing the Prime Minister some distress has he definitely been released to the Press well the minister gave expressed instructions before noon isn't that I'm appalled at you Humphrey how could you let the minister put himself in this position without going through the proper channels Minister and I believe in open government we want to throw open the windows and there's in a bit of fresh air isn't that right Ministry well Minister it's good party stuff but it puts the prime minister in a very difficult situation personally what about our commitment to open government this seems to be the closed season for open government do you want to you want to give thought to a draft letter of resignation Minister I mean just in case it up you mean suppress it yes I suppose I do I see you mean that within the framework of the guidelines about open government that you have laid down you are suggesting that we should adopt a more flexible posture right well yes yes excuse me Minister about the press release there appears to have been a development which could precipitate a reappraisal of our position apparently we fail to rescind the interdepartmental clearance procedure oh the supplementary stop order came into effect so it's it's all right Minister your your speech hasn't gone to the Press and the duty officer had no instructions to pass it out without clearance from the PM and the foreign office the American reference you see but how come fault is entirely mine minister the procedure for holding our press release is dates back to before the era of open government and I unaccountably omitted to rescind it to hope you'll forgive this lapse well yes of course that's quite a right handbrake quite all right thank you Minister after all we all make mistakes Yes Minister the people of Miranda urged the Scots and the not the English oppression cast off the imperialist Yoke and join the fellowship of a free Nation yes well Minister we would appear to be in court with our trousers dad he'd say this in front of her well I don't like to say I told you it's over it I told you so we've got headache all over our faces Lord egg Minister just imperialist joke three Scottish by-elections on Thursday yes it is indeed a catastrophe a tragedy a cataclysmic apocalyptic Monumental Calamity you did it Humphrey you're paid to advise me advise me well this is not unlike time to advise the captain of the Titanic after he struck the iceberg it should be something we can do hmm we could sing abide With Me Yes Minister oh yes a foreign secretary would like a word ah foreign yes my minister is concerned that the government will have egg all over its face why is he doing it well maybe it's for home consumption he's only just taken over perhaps he's trying to persuade the other African leaders that he's a Parker anti-colonialist yes yes sir the the Press officer would like a word good yeah well minister in Practical terms we have the usual six options one do nothing two is your statement apploring the C three large and official protest for cut off egg five break off diplomatic relations and six to care War which well if we do nothing we implicitly agree with the speech two if we issue a statement we'll just look foolish three if we Lodge a protest it'll be ignored four we can't cut our vein because we don't give them any five if we break off diplomatic relations we can't negotiate the oil rig contract and six if we declare war it might just look as though we were overreacting in the old days we could send in a gun vote Yes I suppose that is absolutely out of the question [Laughter] [Music] may I come in Minister you can try all we needed welcome to the standing committee so friendly you've seen this this abominable speech what are we going to do about it well Minister foreign I think we know what's behind it don't we're happy except Frederick is suggesting that the offending paragraph maybe shall we say a bargaining counter you mean you want something but if he doesn't why send us an advanced copy see well why did you find out what it is he wants because the embassy staff are all new we've only just seen the speech and no one knows anything about this new president except me except you how they were at University together old boy Network hey that was 25 years ago he may not even remember me no I I don't really think I could I think you ought to see him spread with you no Minister I think you'll carry more weight well we're all agreed then that the mountains will go to Muhammad oh no no no Jim's going that's what I meant all right but you'll have to come with me well cops minister I'd hardly let you do it on your own minister [Music] yes yes yes I have read it I have read it you have read it here's ready we have all bloody Reddit can I make myself clear abundantly minister Humphrey we have got to slim down the Civil Service how many people have we got in this department uh this department oh well they're small small house more oh I don't know um two thousand three thousand um about twenty three thousand I think Minnesota in the department for administrative Affairs 23 000 people just administering other administrators we'll have to do a time and motion study see who we can get rid of we did one of those last year it transpared we needed another 500 people foreign Minister we could always close your bureaucratic Watchdog office oh no you don't have it it just opened it so one thing I've done since I got here and As You Wish Minister but it has been criticized as a troublemaker's letterbox it's very popular with the voters Humphrey gives them a chance to help us find ways to stop wasting government money public doesn't know anything about wasting government money we're the experts that's not what I meant well the bureaucratic Watchdog office stays well offhand I can't think of what else to suggest Are you seriously telling me that there is no way we can cut down well I suppose we could lose one or two of the tea ladies should take this tea ladies I want the facts I want to know who works here what they do what buildings we have what goes on in them a complete record they will know where to cut costs cut stuff cut procedures the Civil Service Minister exists to implement legislation enacted by Parliament as long as Parliament continues to legislate the Civil Service must continue however I'm fully seized if your requirements Minister and if you excuse me I'll go and set the wheels in motion my name is diesel weisels part of the matter is that the Civil Service and I are in complete Accord over this whole business and I'm happy to announce that we are now ready to put our proposals into publication in fact tonight I can say that from September the 1st every citizen of the UK will have the absolute right to inspect his personal file and check any information that he or she has ever supplied to the government no civil servant will be allowed to examine personal files from another department without a written Authority from the minister and I shall be announcing in the house next week legislation enabling citizens to take legal action against any civil servant who gains unauthorized access to his file encouraging Minister why did you not say so in the first place and put people's minds at rest frankly I didn't believe that the Civil Service could meet our deadlines Godfrey but they've convinced me that they can and in fact my permanent secretary has staked his reputation on it if not Heads Will Row anyway assistant what did you make of our Minister's performance well I I think it's checkmate oh this email in the Box last night of course Minister how was I good a most remarkable performance Minister if I may say something may you may thank you Wednesday well Minister we've been working very hard all night I'm happy to be able to tell you that we have come up with some draft proposals which would enable you to achieve your desired objectives by the stated dates well done Humphrey you see I told the nation how Splendid you were I was right I had every confidence in you quite certain minister must have had quite a night Yes Minister quite a night let's see your proposals yeah they are yeah are mine would you have specific proposals too you need a huh now you read out what you've got on safeguards and I'll read out what I've got and we'll see how they compare personal data 1A safeguards must be applied with reference to two criteria the need to know and the right to know one a one the knee two only those officials may be deemed prima facie to have a need to know you seem to be of the same mind Humphrey indeed where did those proposals come from laughs minister can you hear me where did those proposals come from my lips are seek just one more thing Minister the evidence to the central policy review staff we mean the think attack country yes what about it have you redrafted the redraft of your draft you don't want to yet do yes why well so that we can re-draft it no that won't be necessary I think it will minister country drafting is not a civil service Monopoly though no it's a highly specialized skill which few outside the service can Master nonsense draft is easy it's a game anyone can play not without getting huffed so could I have the draft proposal please certainly hungry when Minister later I'm blue yes but when you're always saying we mustn't rush things aren't you Minister I must ask you for a straight answer on what day tomorrow Monday Tuesday in due course Humphrey it's the appropriate juncture in the fullness of time when the moment is right when the necessary procedures have been completed if nothing precipitate of course Minister this is getting urgent I'm through what a lot of new words we're learning well forgive me if I say this but I'm beginning to suspect that you are concealing something from me surely you and I have no secrets from each other have we have it I'm sorry Minister but sometimes one is forced to consider the possibility that Affairs are being conducted in a way which all things being considered and making all possible allowances is not to put too fine a point on it perhaps not entirely straightforward well you're the expert on straightforwardness so what about the draft evidence to the central policy review staff well that's Capri and perfectly straightforward I I have redrafted it myself I don't want you to redraft it I am perfectly happy with it as it is may I be bold enough to ask what you have said I said what I wanted to say phased reductions in the Civil Service yes but I Humphrey you have frustrated me over open government you're frustrated me over the economy drive but this time I'm going to have my way the party wanted the public wants it and I am bound to say that all we get from the Civil Service is delaying tactics well I wouldn't call Civil Service delays tactics Minister that would be to mistake lethargy for strategy Venezuela but you must realize that there is a real desire for radical reform in the air the all-party select committee on administrative Affairs which I founded as a case in point it's a great success indeed what has it achieved nothing yet Parker's very pleased with it why 10 column inches in last Monday's Daily Mail for a start oh I see the government is going to measure its success in column inches is it yes no yes and no a minister the evidence that you're proposing to submit is not only untrue it is also which is much more serious unwise now we've been through all this before the expansion of the Civil Service is the result of parliamentary legislation not bureaucratic Empire building so when this next comes up at question time you want me to tell Parliament that it's their fault that the civil service is too big but it's the truth Minister I do what the truth I'm not something I can tell Parliament and for your my permanent secretary you're supposed to enact my policies yet but I still don't understand why you seem implacably opposed to them I must know where you stand on all this well one stands Minister depends upon where one sits I imagine infer that you'll not support me oh we'll always support you Minister but as your standard better not as your pull better every what are you saying I should have thought it was crystal clear Minister do not send this report to a body whose recommendations are to be published that is exactly why I'm sending it now I don't want to hear any more about it so you think this might not get into the national press well a few lines on the inside page of the Guardian but nothing to worry about actually it's only the urban middle class who worry about the preservation of the countryside because they don't have to live in it would that be almost there yeah no this may well blow over but it doesn't answer my basic question which was why wasn't I told about it before I made the announcement there are those who have argued and indeed urgently that on occasion there are some things it is better for a minister not to know I I'm talking about it minister your answers in the house at the press conference was superb you were convincing and convinced the critics were silenced but could you have spoken with the same Authority if the ecological pressure group had been a badgering you but I have a right to know I am the people's representative what right have you got to withhold this information from me it's in your own best interest minister of something that is better for a minister not to know I mean it's outrageous it must not occur again it so happens that I've got a plan here for the reorganization of this department which will ensure that it doesn't indeed yes indeed now if I were to have one under secretary and two assistant secretaries reporting directly to meet Minister please no just a moment Humphrey let me tell you my plan the plan is immaterial Minister I have something to say to you which you may not like to hear why should today be any different [Laughter] minister the traditional allocation of executive responsibilities has always been so determined as to liberate the ministerial incumbent from the administrative minutiae by devolving the managerial functions to those whose experience and qualifications have better form them for the performance of such humble offices thereby releasing their political overlords for the more onerous duties and profound deliberations which are the inevitable concomitant of their exalted position foreign if you insist you are not here to run this department you are not here to run this department I think I am the people think I am too with respect Minister you are they are wrong and who does run this department I do see how much am I supposed to do we've been through all this before make policy get legislation enacted and a bubble secure the Department's budget in cabinet I sometimes think that the budget is all you ever really care about well it is rather important Minister if nobody cared about the budget we might end up with the department so small that even a minister could run it hungry are we about to have a fundamental disagreement about the nature of democracy no Minister Amelia demarcation dispute what I mean is that the menial chore running a department is beneath you your fashion for a nobler calling well I'm quite prepared to leave the routine paperwork to you but I must insist insist on direct access to all information never again do I want to hear that phrase there are some things that is better for a minister not to know is that clear well minutes I do that is an order Humphrey as you say Minister if that is what you really want treating cabinet ministers as though they were irresponsible 10 euros Miss hacker intends to join the badger protest Oh I thought it was over no she and her boyfriend are going to conduct a 24-hour Save the Badgers vigil in Hayward spinny unless a protection order is restored and they're putting their announcement out to the Press at 5 PM Minister's daughter in Badger protest vigil that's a little embarrassing but it's not too serious so Harvey I think the minister is going to be more than a little embarrassed what do you mean Minister's daughter in new to Badger protesters uh yes Miss hacker and her boyfriend will be uh that is will not not be I mean I guess do you mean stuck as Bernard yes sir I see well this puts a different complexion on it yeah especially in this weather but in true journalistic terms this makes it a big story front page with photograph foreign what shall we say a slight embarrassment Minister how's life well without wishing in any sense to overstate the case or cause and do alarm nevertheless I'm hungry out with it Minister I have a confession to make that's a change come on okay make a clean rest of it not the happiest of phrases how do you mean I have to confess that the badges in hayward's spinning may turn out to be a somewhat bigger story than we thought no don't tell me they're going to have kittens that's not the Badgers who are going to have kittens man is there there's going to be a 24-hour protest vigil in Hayward spinner what you told me it wouldn't be very newsworthy no it's just slightly different Minister it's to be conducted by by a girl student and her boyfriend it's matter to some people nonsense Vernon Bernard everybody's fed up with these ghastly students they're just exhibitionists you know well in this case it would seem they have something to exhibit it's to be a nude protest video I see yes that would make the front pages yeah it's quite tip well the press just mustn't find out I don't know what gets into these students it's appalling a Shameless indeed Minister it's their parents you know you don't bring them up properly just let them run wild and then feed them all this trendy middle class anti-establishment nonsense well perhaps it isn't entirely the parents fault minute of course it is Authority Humphrey all the student energy is a shocking indictment their parents lack of authority and discipline so they just take it out on innocent people like me the window well we know the young lady's name they do let me see well it seems she's a Miss hacker her name that's coincidence not a complete coincidence oh my God oh my God as you see she will be telephoning in 10 minutes time perhaps the Press won't be all that interested but will he really think it worthwhile going all the way up to Warwickshire for a story like this I fear they'll think it worth going all the way to the South Pole ah good morning Minister good morning I'm praying morning Bernard sorry I'm late just put them on the desk would you charge yes it'd be about an hour I don't want to be late at broadcasting house right sir what's this broadcast All About by the way NATO isn't it uh no Minister Partnerships in Industry oh yes I knew it was something like that who else is in it it's all in their Minister an employer and a trade unionist as usual Joe Morgan wasn't neither the TUC representative on the solar health project uh Minister ah Minister you are not proposing to refer to the solihull project on the air certainly I regard it as a shining example of cooperation between the government and Private Industry yes but all the same I would be much happier if it were omitted right well don't you think it's rather premature started months ago exactly um rather out of date in fact premature and out of date well untimely don't you think it'd be rather uninteresting to the general public interest something that's going on right now extremely interesting yes it's quite so um so interesting in fact that there is a danger that it might obscure your main point perhaps what is my main point Ben and what's The Minister's name oh uh yes that uh private projects are more socially responsible with government money and government projects are more efficient with private investment I see it underlines my main point you really are a wet blanket aren't you happy just go about stirring up apathy Minister I must seriously advise you with all the earnestness at my command not to refer to the Surly hell project on the air today why what I said why why well Minister couldn't be the job planning to take the credit for this yourself could it at next month's European Convention of government Administration your keynote speech will make very good reading won't it well let me tell you a few Facts of Life Humphrey it is politicians who are responsible ultimately to the people and it is we who get the credit not civil servants Minister I would be perfectly happy for you to have the credit for this project but I must beg beseech and implore you not today no it's no good Humphrey I'm not going to fall for it I'm going to get all the political Capital like Canada for sale project when I see one please Minister do listen no no minister no happy what what seven and a half million pounds probable bankrupt proceeding imminent collapse of project well in it collapse of project why didn't you tell me all this before Minister I am deeply conscious of the heavy burdens so this becomes public knowledge to be all over the front pages it's a public Scandal a disaster it's appalling wait a minute Jim look this report is dated before the election you're in the clear you're laughing yes but unfortunately under the convention of ministerial responsibility the blame but everyone will know it wasn't Jim quite so but the principle of democratic accountability requires the occasional human sacrifice when the pack is paying for blood isn't that right Minister surely he has only to point to the dates oh a lesser man might try to wriggle out of it but there is only one honorable course open as the minister is well aware Frank might have a point except of course only today Minister you have publicly identified yourself with the success of the project the broadcast well it's due for transmission about now no yes I'm afraid stop it stop what Minister oh yes sir well Minister I wish you luck but you know what the BBC are like Crisis an emergency this is a scandal of course I'm sure of you to put it like that they might might what move it to Peak listening time I would like to find out that there is a perfect result of what can be done it's going on up and say hell no I'm money and private investment in real partnership and it does seem to be symbolic of everything this government is working for I've taken a great deal of personal interest in this early half project and it's not just words it's actually there symbolic of everything is government as well how could you let me sell those things Minister I can only advise I did advise I advise most strongly but when the advice is advisor all right all right all right advise me now certainly Minister now it is possible that the bank may take over the contract from Bradley and Sloan Enterprises limited and all will be well the bank fine well the bank however is hesitant but it so happens that the director in charge is to retire next year and he's anxious to find another appointment a chairmanship of a quango for instance well give him one given that one you're reserving for that idiot Desmond Glenn who is the director and John Desmond Glasgow it's not a bad chat he's always attacking the government in public yes well this is good sometimes to a point out opponents I mean you know it's Democratic Statesman like yes I've changed my mind I think that's a very good appointment but you can't shut up Frank anybody else know about this well apart from ourselves and the bank and Michael Bradley only the union representative on the project Joe Morgan of course that's what was behind his special Birmingham Alliance claim blackmail it was quite Terminus time I've been thinking if Desmond glazebrook is going to be chairman he'll need some support went here now I was thinking of a deputy chairman someone with real experience of Industry an excellent thought minister is there anyone you could advise me would be particularly appropriate do you think and a trade unionist for example um what about Joe Morgan Minister Joe excellent idea well done Humphrey oh it takes two to quango minister

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Keywords: bbc, bbc comedy greats, bbc comedy, comedy greats, british comedy, stand up, Sitcom, Comedian, Comic, Sketch show, comedy show, comedy video, sir humphrey, sir humphrey appleby, humphrey appleby, nigel hawthorne, sir nigel hawthorne, paul eddington, derek fowlds, bernard woolley, The Best of Sir Humphrey from Series 1, The Best of Sir Humphrey from Series 1 | Yes Minister | BBC Comedy Greats, yes minister, yes prime minister, jim hacker, james hacker, best of yes minister

Id: 9WupyKCfB_E

Length: 29min 56sec (1796 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 03 2023