Everyone knows Spider-Man doesn't murder,
and in Marvel's Spider-Man, Insomniac made sure to have their bases covered, even including
a special web technology that latches bad guys onto the wall if you kick them off of
a roof. But sometimes Spider-Man's fighting style
looks a bit murder-y. So I'm here to justify 13 ways Spider-Man
is definitely not murdering people. Number one, electrocution. Eh, this is just a Taser on steroids, it's
not that big of a deal. Number two, webbing people to scaffolding
and then pulling that scaffolding down. Scaffolding doesn't weigh that much, really,
when you think about it. Number three, yanking people out of a moving
car. This is like the same thing as on the roof,
your web's going to pull them to a wall. It's a car. It's dangerous. Should've worn a seatbelt, buddy. Number four, webbing and then throwing rockets
back to people. The web here actually destroys the ability
for the rocket to explode, so it's basically like throwing a thermos at someone's head. Number five, throwing a manhole cover. Wikipedia tells me that most manhole covers
are roughly 250 pounds, but at least he's throwing them vertically and not like a terrible
death frisbee. Number six, throwing a motorcycle. This one is very heavy and also explodes. Motorcycles are inherently dangerous, eh,
they were probably gonna hurt themselves driving it around anyway, so... Number seven, ricocheting bullets back at
people. This is a special Spider-Man suit power, and,
uh, it's just self defense. Spider-Man is making the conscious decision
to turn it on and have those bullets go back at people, but... self defense. Number eight, diving under someone so that
they get shot by the bullets. Totally fine. Yes, it will force one henchman to violently
shoot one of their own friends. Um. We never said Spider-Man couldn't murder someone
psychologically. Number nine, smacking someone's head on an
I-beam. Now this one, it will, it will have some lasting
damage. Peter Parker is a real smart guy, and he probably
put something in the web that is healing, and so it's kind of like a cocoon, and, but,
when they come out of the cocoon instead of being a butterfly, they'll have lasting brain
damage. Number 10, the snapping neck finisher. This one does sound very bad. *CRRRACK* It sounds very bad. But it could be some sort of unlicensed chiropracty. Number 11, the air finisher where you fling
the person down onto their head. *deep breath* um... The way the guy crumples right there is very
disconcerting. Self-defense, again, right? And hopefully no one will point out the fact
that Spider-Man kicked that person into the air first and then flung them onto the ground
because that would be a hard sell to... to pretty much any jury. Number 12, webbing and then throwing someone
into a lake. This does kind of look like Spider-Man has
had a premeditated motive to send this webbed up person into a small pond, kind of like
disposing of a body by putting it into a rolled up carpet and throwing it in a river. But... that isn't what it is. Spider-Man noticed this man was overheating
and wanted him to relax in a pond. And finally, webbing someone onto a truck
that will most likely explode and then deliberately saving two of the people but not the one you
webbed up. *explosion* You know that guy deserved
it, so, like, who fuckin' cares, right? Thanks so much for watching this video. If you want to learn more about Spider-Man's
fighting, which is definitely not murder, you can check out Pat's incredible dissection
of Spider-Man's fighting style.
