Welcome to the wonderful world of Pokémon in the
new games, Pokémon Ketchup and Mustard!! I'm Professor Tree, and I'm gonna ask you what your gender is. You're finally 10, and that means it's time to go off on a
nationwide journey to fight gang members and monsters! Now that you got your twig with eyeballs
by your side, it's totally safe! But watch out— along the way you're gonna have
to deal with the villainous TEAM PANTS. But first, you need to know how to catch a Pokémon! no you can't skip this tutorial And if you catch ALL the Pokémon and put 'em
in this... Poké-brick, you get a digital certificate! Wow, look at that! That's... not even
a real reward in-universe! Get a badge from all the gyms! There's a
gym for every Pokémon type except dark. Sound too difficult? Use the EXP Share to
CHEAT your way through the game! It's understandable! Pokémon's really hard. The strategy's really complex! There's
type matchups, and that's it. Here are some Professor Pointers™ to help you
remember what's super-effective against what! Grass absorbs Water. If you hit a bird with a brick,,
it'll stop moving a...fraid of the dark? punch it! Shoutouts to the best Pokémon, Qwilfish Keepin' it real since 2001 B) Experience the wonder of boundless
childlike adventure, with no limitations! (LOUD GASP) You don't have the right move to get past THAT! Oh well! I guess you'll just have to FLY back
to town and change your party member! Every once and a while, the game takes a break from brutal
dogfights to remind you that Pokémon is about friendship. <3 "Oh. This one doesn't have the nature I was looking for." "Don't worry! You can be a breeding slave." You can always tell who the bad guy in these
games is gonna be, 'cause he sounds like this: "HEM-HANDED PHILOSOPHY!" "HWHOAAA! SOMEONE SPILLED KETCHUP ON MY PANTS!" "NOW, I'M GOING TO USE [this game's legendary Pokémon]
TO DESTROY ALL [love]." "GO, MEGA SCRAFTY!!!" Is that writing too tactful for you? Well, don't worry,
'cause Pokémon has backstory now! Once upon a time, a 9-foot-tall king from 3,000 years
ago used a war machine to rip the universe apart so there were... multiple universes...
and the meteor went to... ours... and... I just wanna catch a bulbasaur man T-T Shoutouts to the best Pokémon, Probopass Keepin' it real......... 1999 B))) And if you hate having fun, you can spend
9 hours looking for the specific Pokémon with the right EVs and IVs and
Eevees to use in competitive! And since you clearly like wasting time, once you beat the
game, be sure to hop onboard the Battle Funicular and try your hand at DIAGONAL BATTLES! Gotta get good so you can beat all the both NPCs that know it! And don't forget the rewards: Hooray! ...a Dire Hit! yaaaaaaaaaay And then in a few months, be sure to pick up Pokémon
Horseradish, the slightly enhanced version with 500 new roaming legendaries! You gotta buy it! 'cause this version has ALL the Pokémon in it! Yo shoutouts to the best Pokémon, Alololom...mololamo Keepin' it real,,,, 1963 B)))))))) ahaha it's so dumb "GO, ADMIN CORDUROY!" "GO, ADMIN CHAPSSS!" "THEY MADE FUN OF MY JORTS, BUT WHO'S
LAUGHING NOW? AHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!" "JOIN ME, AND TOGETHER, WE SHALL CREATE A
WORLD THAT IS COMFY AND EASY TO WEAR!" "AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Thank you guys so much for watching! If you'd like to support
the show, then please check out audible.com. Audible has an unmatched selection of audiobooks,
original audio shows, news, comedy, and more. And if you use my link at audible.com/Jello, you can get a free audiobook of your choice, right now, AND you get to KEEP that audiobook after the trail ends, even if you don't continue the service. That is a good deal. In honor of SPOOKY MONTH, I'm gonna recommend a book about
one of the best horror-ish films of all time, Young Frankenstein: A Mel Brooks Book: The Story and Making of the Film! Written and narrated by— you guessed it— Mel Brooks! Pick up that book or any other book of your
choice absolutely free by using this link. I'd really appreciate it. Thanks! Here's a few more Professor Pointers™ to help you
remember type matchups using common logic! It's really hard to punch a bird! You can't be psychic if there's a bug on you. Ice gets in cracks and does that thing
where it breaks the ground, but, not rocks, which are strong against ice, despite, coming, out of, the ground :/ Can't get your computer to work? Punch it! Got the wrong flavor of ice cream? Punch it! Can't get your boss to give you that raise? Punch it! And if you're fighting a shadow Pokémon, you should turn the game off, and... play a better one.
