S05 Ep01: Do You Have a Rejection Mindset?

we are entering into a new season of episodes and we want to get into a very important one because it is going to steal and Rob your ability to live in the love of God in quality relationships and live powerfully in your identity we're gonna expose the rejection mindset and really help you to take the next level in your journey of transformation hi I'm mark - hey Suze and I'm here with my wife Melissa and this is transformed you Oh so it's great to have you all here with us it's good to to be here today we're looking forward to diving into this subject it's been one of the most fruitful revelations and uncovering things that prevent us from being able to walk free and that's a big thing that we're about we we enjoy are passionate about helping people to uncover the stuff that gets in the way how many of you listening watching this you've got some things that you're processing pursuing and you feel like man something's in the way mm-hmm and we want to share a little bit of our story but a lot of times what is at the root system of preventing you from being able to break forward is rejection and so we're going to talk about that and we'll get into some various ways in upcoming episodes and how it works how it affects and I invite you encourage you to share this with your friends if you feel like you can't speak into somebody's life in a certain area just share this and it will help them to maybe have some I don't know which brings me to you got over there for sound actually brings me to the point that I would like to bring up first about this topic because I it relates to my own journey is like it's really hard to come to terms with it and recognize it for I think a lot of people because it was for me like I had a major oh no I don't have that I think that's the biggest issue that we run into up front when it comes to transformation is getting someone to become self aware of what the problem is because everybody's broken and the problem is is everybody has different ways of covering up defending hiding you know super spiritualizing their brokenness rather than just realizing yeah I'm broken and and God loves me in it and now what God can you come in and work in this area of my life so takes a lot of work I find we don't address it until we hit a major breaking point yeah where the pain threshold has exceeded so much that we go okay finally I'll let down my guard you had mentioned that you felt like I'm good right and that's that's very common for us we can kind of go yeah I'm good life is good because things seem to be okay but we're not aware there's stuff under the surface that's impacting us that we we need to address at some point it's gonna hinder us in our journey yeah and rejections a big one yeah I think twofer for me there was like other layers of things that I had to get to as well because of what my rejection was tied to how it got there like a lot of those things for me I'm like getting weird a guilt when it came to family like there was a lot of layers to rejection to that I think just to encourage people it's not just a light bulb that goes off and you go oh I have rejection let me just renounce it and I'm good like this is a journey of unwinding this because this thing will creep into you know it wants to destroy any relationship so it wants to be in there causing division so that's the lens and how you see things you know we we can get further into it but I just want to encourage people that be be kind to yourself even if you're starting to recognize this because it's a journey of unwinding it I think you know in fact I find that transformation deliverance all of it whatever you want to call it whatever terms people are comfortable with Healing freedom inner healing whatever the majority of is process-oriented we want it to be an event we want it to be a moment we want to be a snap our fingers everything changes and that's just not the that's not the fullness of the journey even if you have those dynamic defining moments there's usually a whole journey leading up yeah that moment right and if we can buckle our seatbelts and kind of go okay I've got a journey of learning to grow in what love means and who God is and who I am that's really what this subject surrounds the war that surrounds you experiencing love to its fullness and impacting every area of your life really knowing who you are now in a fabricated way not in a false you know persona not in a performance way but truly being rooted in the love that God has for you and the identity of sonship right let's just pause there for a second I feel like heavenly rays are all over those like that to me is like the ultimate of what's your German with angels you're like going above the clouds like you know you're good you know who you are right but it's but it's it's not something you can fake it spits it's it's something to you want to pursue the real thing and then it reflects in your relationships and this is where we found ourselves digging our heels in a bit because we found Christianity was emphasizing this so much you know you and God and we were not dealing with each other and we were seeing people like it's almost like you're getting in the way of me and God and it's like and gods like that and gods like no that relationship is actually an opportunity for you to do an inside work in healing an area and 99% of the time it begins with a rejection root issue so you could use the term rejection a spirit of rejection rejection root we call it a rejection mindset because we want we want to do is help people to realize that this is a it's a matrix that begins to develop in your life that wherever love has not had its work right and Hui on the planet knows the love of God perfectly you know and walks in it well some people that say they do that's that's a difficult tribe of people to sometimes deal with because they're not denials there none of us we all have it so wherever love is absent in any way in any area rejection seeks to invade and what it will do is it will create separation make you feel separated from love so then you got to do stuff to try to get your way back into love or it will distort it it'll distort what love looks like and it'll leave you really really just you know bad patterns and what's its goal I don't want you to feel loved I don't want you to know who you are because if you get those two things then my lies won't work that's what the enemy knows right so when you began your discovery and you were as you said in your resistance of I don't have that problem you you're you're we can call it stubbornness was it was it pride sure sure so what was it what was it that broke it open what was it that said oh wow I've got to deal with this I think it was a series of things and you can stop me because you're married to me and we refer to each other as our second holy spirit but for me it was a series of things it was unfortunately incidents that I couldn't get past it made me have to like turn the mirror on myself to say what is going on in me that I either a can I get past these situations I can't love properly I'm up all night like what is going on inside of me where I just had like such a really dysfunctional pattern of things but I have to say like rejection was the hardest one for me to come to terms with to actually see and to discern it it really really was there was a pride aspect of like I don't have that I don't have that it really took a lot of unwinding and really recognizing unhealthy pattern so for me it wasn't like a light bulb moment of oh my goodness I have rejection it was really me putting like a magnifying glass on certain things of how I was interacting how I was responding to things yeah like it was it was it was just a journey for me don't you think well yeah I think it was for you and I think that first of all you needed to feel safer to be okay to process some of those things I think a lot of people don't feel safe to let their hair down to go okay okay so before we get into your Epiphany I want to just can we let's just stay on that moment for because you can say that well people need to feel safe let's unwind a little bit like what safety okay what do you think when you say well you needed to feel safe what do you think that that looks like you needed to feel safe in your own skin that you could deal with your brokenness and it wasn't gonna change the people who loved you it wasn't gonna make them all go away and if they did they never loved you to begin with right okay so you need it to come to a point because rejection is like the route right so pride comes on top of rejection because pride says I don't want you to see my brokenness I have a portrayal of how I am so you had like a certain aspect relationally I think that you felt like you needed to operate in and even when you met me you said I was chock-full and rejection high performance focused on achievement you know and when I was a pastor at that time and one of your joking statements you say to me was he how an interact you were you seem like you were kind of you were stuck up right so you made that statement about me mm-hmm which that's that's like that's like the first appearance right it's it's a protective mechanism yes absolutely I'm not I'm not meaning to be stuck up right I'm so in my protective world that's where my energy is going right I'm using my energy that's why we're so exhausted that's why we are so exhausted well first of all we're so busy all day long but when we are operating we are operating from geared up mechanisms like you go to work you can't just be yourself you've got to put on a presentation you you've got to put on something because we don't know who we are and we can't just relax be ourselves so preachers have to put on a preacher voice and you know salespeople have to put on a sales voice and there's all these things that we have to like and at the end of the day there's been no cultivation of true identity so going back to you there's like there needed to be like a true permission it's not totally like just your environment some people like well I don't feel safe that's never gonna be perfect which do need some people that are like hey it's all right it's all right and I feel like that's what we were tried to be for each other but then there was areas I wasn't aware of that you could see there's worries you weren't aware of that I could see and you can't it's very hard to like just point it out because you get a lot of resistance and I spend a lot of my time getting resistance from people and so I have to wait like until they get it and they're ready you know then well then we'll go because it does what took for me it took a meltdown to realize the root of rejection so anyway the the safety and yourself to go recognizing this doesn't mean I'm less of a person in fact it makes you a better person to recognize this issue I admire people that are willing to recognize something not be like condemned in it not fall into a puddle of shame in it but recognize yeah this is something I've got to work through and I've got to heal through and it's okay because God's with me he loves me and he's not disqualifying me because I have this issue so rejection is not just something that happens to you because people say well I've not really been rejected I've had a decent life it's like no no that's not even what this is about this is about what you carry generationally maybe we'll spend an episode doing that yeah you carry an imprint of your generations you carry a whole grid it's in your genetics it's in your spiritual genetics you have certain patterns that you've experienced that you may or may not been aware of that effective you certain relationships that you've had in that certain mindsets come in in that if it's not the love of God and his truth the enemy sneaks in there and and conditions you slowly over time to live in a way that doesn't allow you to rest in the love of God that he has for you right so so I think that my awakening was in the midst of I've got I've got severe anxiety very severe OCD battlegrounds and can't maneuver relationships in a healthy way I feel like a just a hot mess and so in that time I had a friend of mine do some prayer ministry with me and he just said this one thing he said he said you really need to look at rejection in your life and he named off some things that we should pray through and they became triggers then I went and looked at the scriptures and started this whole thing just like opened up this like veil open that came off and I started to see the best way I can describe it's like I saw a tree a very toxic tree and I saw the root system and there was like names in the parts of the root system at the bottom it was rejection and everything that flowed out of it were supporting roots of rejection and then it went up to the tree and the branches so that's when I first realized we live in branch cutting ministry we we deal with symptoms even met you know you hate to say it but medicine does the same thing too they prescribe a drug which only deals with a symptom never deals with the root issue right and we do that spiritually like let's just pray for you or let's just no it's all great stuff but we never get to the real root because it's hard to point it out in somebody it's hard to tell somebody listen you have rejection issues and especially in the area of your father relationship you know you you know I'm people are like then you get into like the mother relationship ain't getting to people stuff you're like they're like this is too painful this is too much and it's like no my daddy loved me he was perfect it's like oh okay well know well or the worst one is I knew he did he didn't have to say it I knew he did I'm good you knew he loved you even though he didn't say yeah yeah and and and so then people aren't struggle with like what if I look at my wounds then that's disrespecting my family it's like it's not you can do it in it you can do it in honor you don't even you in fact you really shouldn't bring it to them cuz they're not the they're not the healing source you bring it to God but yeah so it was in that time that I realized but the key thing for me the key like really thick vine of this disgusting twisted mindset was performance I did not realize it but my whole upbringing and into my adult years I had a gauge I don't feel loved I got to do something I don't feel loved I got to do something I would venture to say the majority of Christianity lives in that dilemma we don't want to admit it but it's just true they wake up in the morning they feel distant from God so I gotta get in my devotion so I can get closer so they feel like they got to do something to earn it or a lot of people out there just really get super busy in like involvement and ministry and helping people I'm sure I think a big one I did this this is a lot of my kind of rejection issues would come out in because I'm not the performer but what would happen to me is in relationship I would get so wound up to get the person's approval that I would over talk put on a fabricated personality and over talk until I tried to like make myself feel better like somehow I was like loved by them again or I felt safe again of course it never worked just spin out that is performing but I'm yeah but don't equate performing with just achieving performing yeah okay you know what that's a better way of saying it yeah performing performing encompasses everything anytime you there's a pressure to put on something either a personality or through something to make people happy or so that's where it went with you with obsession it did with me too like if somebody who's mad at me I'm done for a week I'm spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning can't stop thinking about it so you name it every branch I address and talk about I had it so I think that it it's it's interesting cuz for me it was like kind of like hitting rock bottom emotionally brought it out for you it was like layers of okay I think I've got this okay I guess I really got I think to another reason why in some ways I didn't think I really had it is I was really good to it kind of running and hiding in my shame and going nope not going there click off I think a lot of just dual thing that I would do where with certain people I would you know perform and pursue to try to make it feel right and feel better make myself feel better or in however I felt in relationships I just ran and hid because I couldn't handle how it felt right right like I could relate to all that and I think that these episodes that we're gonna get into are really only for the people that want to get honest with themselves if you think you're good life is great and you don't have to deal with it anything and Jesus paid the price and you you don't have to deal with any issues of your life and stuff like that this these episodes are not gonna be for you but if you're like man you know what I see stuff kick up when I'm in relationships and I see stuff kick up in my relationship with God and I feel there's a there's some limitations that I experienced my life then this is gonna be something for you this is for the hungry this is for the people that want they want all that God has to offer them in their inner life and in the relational life so it then began to to branch out into even the people I began to work with I said we got to start with the rejection route because that then spins out everything we need to we need to help you to gain a receptivity to God's love but we also need to help your relationships because you can sit there in your closet and God loves me loves me loves me but if you go out and interact with people and all the goofy stuff rises up from rejection then it's like it's stealing mmm the fruit of it so let's talk about some of the goofy stuff let's talk about what some of that goofy stuff looks like I think that would help people because I think for me - one of the big things that helped me as an identifier was you were good of that in a loving way where I was like I'm good in showing me that like look at how look at how you're reacting to these situations and the more I kind of talked it out like Oh cuz you start to feel a Yaqui I knew I needed to prove to you though I needed to prove to you that I we could talk about something and I could go yeah that's that's rejection and oh and I need I needed to prove to you that in saying that I you are still safe after talking about that because this is excruciating this is a very varied if this is a reason why what we're doing sometimes it's so difficult because somebody shares and the response is important and if the response is condescending or if the response is glazed the person is gonna crawl right back into their shame filled rejection we could probably do a lot of shows on that one people don't know how to respond to people going through tough stuff sharing their heart because we'll rejection rejection drives a sense of I've got a reputation I got a reputation that I need to maintain so I've got to guard that so if this person sharing that's making me uncomfortable because I haven't done it dealt with um hi stuff so that's very important otherwise this whole subject doesn't go anywhere and even sometimes people can look at this and when they dive in they get overwhelmed oh my goodness there's so many different branches it's it's not about discovering every branch it's about discovering what God's showing you right now and dealing with the layer that he brings to your attention and usually it's the the problem that the area of pain or the problem that's throbbing the most that you kind of go alright what do I need to do with this she takes conversation so let's just kind of make that a solid point for today it takes conversation it takes safety and conversation to unwind it because a lot of the time it's hard to be we're not a lot of us are super self-aware and it a lot of the time does help when you have somebody that you can go hey do you notice I feel like I have these patterns going on is that something you see like I know that takes a lot to get there but it does help if you can do that with your spouse or someone you love and trust because this is not easy to walk out alone right and and if you say show me you need to followup with receiving it because that's a dangerous statement people say if you've ever us all the time if you ever see anything no we won't I won't if you tell me that I won't cuz that's a sign that huh I'm about to be pushed off a cliff so I what I could do is I could respond to what you're asking about helping people to look what this looks like and ask some questions awesome questions that surround the rejection area that's good and then there's like a whole litany of questions that follow that but like a core one is can you easily experience the Father father God his unconditional love on an ongoing basis is it something that you can readily access live in dwell in feel and experience do not tell me you know God loves you because that is cerebral yeah I know he loves me you just told me a statement of fact I want in your heart even right now as you're listening to my voice can you feel and connect to the safety of the love that he has for you right where you are right now you said it really beautifully that makes me feel like I could go right it's like by the way I said it I have welcome to integrate you were like laying the foundation for it I don't really know a lot I'm sorry maybe it's just the people I've bumped into and myself I don't know a lot of people that live like that aren't we all the journey of that that's it's a problem yeah it's like on the scale I guess really it's more a scale of how bad is it to do know what I'm saying instead of like are you living in his unconditional love all the time it's like okay more so on the scale of one to ten ten being really bad and you don't at all like where are you on the you know what it's tough but I can I can access it is number one if right imagine it this way imagine what your day would look like in everything you did if you knew you were absolutely 100% unconditionally loved accepted approved of validated by your father in heaven and that's I use father a lot because that's what Jesus came to bring us to help us to understand the father we have a lot of Christians that yeah jesus loves me this I know everything Jesus did point into the father and we're avoiding the father cuz it's uncomfortable because we all have daddy issues and we don't want to deal with our daddy issues and it sounds psychobabble or it sounds no it's Bible and Jesus kept saying father show you the father teach us how to pray our Father when what do we how do we do this ask the Father in my name I'm not gonna ask him for you you pray to him I'm the way the truth and the life no one goes to the Father except through him Jesus is in the garden Abba if you die will you need to talk about to daddy so this whole revelations been lost rejection stole the father revelation Wow so it said okay you've accepted Jesus I can't rob you of that but I'll rob you of the revelation of the father so you'll you'll always have a cap in what love means it's like having a great relationship with an older brother who's amazing and he's always there for you it sticks up for you but you never knew your dad yeah right so true we know there's there's there's gonna be struggles no matter how may and Jesus it's not to take away anything from who Jesus is he is the cornerstone he made everything possible I would not know the father apart from Jesus so they are won in their operation but that's important you do really connect to that and what would your day look like if you are fully immersed in it your confidence would soar your hope would soar your faith your direction your energy it's like if you just breathe in the energy of that because that's what you and because of that our hearts are broken because we feel distant from that we know we don't we don't carry that so that's the first I think area that's important another question you can ask is do you love yourself and right there like you know crowds of people just fell like dominoes because that's even uncomfortable to bring up and that's even more for me that's more uncomfortable than dealing with God and I think that was probably one of the bigger questions for me in understanding how I was operating in how I was giving and receiving love like especially to myself was never even brought to my attention I didn't even discover this area loving yourself you know until you know really difficult season of my life that God began to bring this my attention and really came out of the rejection route when you when you struggle to be loved there's no inlet into you receiving that so like the pipes are empty of your reservoir of love so then you're performing for it but you're just always empty so when you look in the mirror there's just no peace and what you see there's no ability to to be okay yeah an effects marriage affects parenting and affects ministry affects every every relationship in your life is affected by whether or not you truly love yourself you know I read I was reading a book and I read it to you there's a statement in the book that to me speaks of this issue of being able to love yourself and having this first established in your foundation that ultimately leads you to understand God's love and the statement in the book was that every child deserves to be exuberantly loved when they walk into a room as a child by their parents write that in your brain I actually read the statement and I just burst into tears number because I didn't experience that number two there was also a part of me that I cried of not having it but that I also couldn't connect to it in an odd way does that make sense it was like this this dual thing which then ultimately led to these struggles of these two questions that were asking do you know how to access God's unconditional love and do you love yourself so then it that you know which to me dealing with how love was established in your life from the jump is the thing the very thing that people are avoiding so we want to jump automatically - yep let me stand there and just get God's love which we are available to receive from him without a doubt all right I'm gonna let myself now I'm gonna no no we like we have a messed up foundation that was started off about love and that needs to be reconciled right so what is if you could give people advice on and we can go into this deeper and further episodes just a little how to begin that aspect of those two questions how to begin the foundation of of reconciling how love was established in your life well I I feel that God designed us to be loved to live in love and so a big part of the problem is the interference it's it's the the transmission has been either blocked or it's been changed to a distorted Channel so so I I'll tell you what I did and I continue to do is I try to be honest about the problem and I said god I don't know your love I don't know who you are as a father but would you show me would you teach me so then I see I believe we can turn around by asking empowering questions I believe it's been one of the best things that's helped me is asking a question that empowers you into a journey versus going God why are you so far away you asked that question right and you don't hear anything because God's not gonna respond to a lie and go well I've been away because he's not right we tend to do that we tend to ask God a question based on a lie hoping for a reply we don't get why don't we go see forget it Yeah right God why did you why did you you know why did you do this thing it's like God didn't do that you know sinful people did the enemy did you know we get we get confused so I feel like God but I want to would you teach me so then I went into the school of the father's love like that's all I thought about for years my study my learning my reading my prayer was just that and there was immersion because God baptizes us um and don't think of the word in like a baptize when you get saved I'm talking about immersing mm-hmm that's what the word means immersion he immerses you in certain themes so that you get it in your system right and that was for me and I allowed the immersion to happen so you put it on the context of everything everything you read and then you discover your learning process so for me reading helped talking it out helped sharing it with others helped slowing down listening worshiping all the posture was God I want to discover this great love you have for me as a dad as a father and and revelation you know start started opening up for me now I'm a I'm a teacher by by gifting so it tends to go in that Avenue where I like to explain it extract it and that kind of stuff but I had to realize God was not the problem and I was not the problem okay so that helps people and I'll be put in contact say it again God was not the problem and I was not the problem because we tend to really beat ourselves up I not spiritual enough and I know people can argue but you have sin and this and we're we're flawed here yes I understand but I want to take the heat off of you that everyone lives under it's not a god stock God's not the problem you're not the problem there's interference in the way that needs to be removed right that needs to be dealt with because you were designed to be loved because I sit down with anyone I say tell me the moment that you felt loved the most I've never had someone say never in my entire life I've never you know if they do am I come on are we being pity right now well there was this time I was with a friend and I've just felt so okay you've had something that's who God is you tasted the most amazing meal you've got one bite of it and gods like I want you to be able to feast off of that on a regular basis so it's more about removing because the love of God is a flow to imagine a river it flows anytime it gets stopped it gets stagnant it's meant to flow from the Father through Christ as a work of the Holy Spirit to you you receive it from him out of that you love him back hmm right if you start with you loving God you're gonna perform that's why he we we love Him because He first loved us it started with him so it's like a flow comes to me and them back to him so so I learned to spend more time receiving rather than giving my prayer is more listening than talking I changed because I'm like I've got to learn right so then I've got to now give that to myself how I see myself so in my relationship now what am I doing with that love pouring out I'm not coming to you going love me love me love me oh it's just a big aspect of one of our follow-up questions about relationships so yeah right yeah because I'm messing with the flow right nope right flowing out of me because I can only give what I have and then the flow continues then you love me back if you don't I go into rejection I get mad and how dare that person if you don't I go back to the beginning of the cycle again right receive it from the healthy love him back love myself I love again because God will meet me in that reservoir to pour out again but that this part here relation is where we're all jacked up and and rejection got in there and go they don't love you isolate so now we get into relationships right and this is really where rejection shows up the most because you walk into a relationship and rejection already owns the narrative rejection already before you've met the person you've already gone they don't want to talk to me look at them how arrogant they are or they're judging me they see my flaws these people aren't gonna like me or I have to do this in this or people ignore me they don't whatever your recorder is whenever you come into new relationships or you're in a room in a setting or whatever the the the the audio or video footage that plays in your mind right start paying attention to it right it identifies the theme rejections working on it identifies it so it's like nobody listens to me okay there it is ignored you constantly feel ignored no but feel important I feel pushed aside right there's value neglected because all that you just take the word what's the theme okay bump you nailed it and so what happens to you then becomes the pattern you agree with so if you say this always seems to happen to me boom you've nailed you've you've just described rejections assignment over your life becomes the lens in which you see everything it's the tapestry of everything whether it's there or not correct it rejection doesn't care it just wants weather and it doesn't matter if it happened or not it's gonna have the same destructive power so whether you meant to reject me or not I perceive it therefore it has the same effect and and and that's why I tell people it doesn't matter if it really happened or not there still needs to be a shifting of that mindset so that those things and and relationships hurt it doesn't mean that you don't hurt the the ultimate thing is that you walk and you're just like Norgan pain and you're like I'm Superman it's all bouncing off of me yeah you're not the Terminator the Terminator is a robot alien you're you're you're you're a human or is he real which aren't we becoming cyborgs we can do a podcast on that if you want we aren't we becoming cyborgs with our with our phones like in our computers and you know it so it's really learning to break agreement that okay this has happened to me because once and and I I in the book exposing the rejection mindset and the online course the online course is a great accompaniment and encourage people to go through that well because it's it's it helps describe it because you need the book but then the video gives a little bit more life to it there's one chapter that I dedicate in the second my life is dedicated to you is the second edition you have to make sure it's the white cover with the blue lettering that's a lot smaller and it is a lot smaller it was it's um it's chiseled down so it's like slim and trim and in great shape and chapter for the rejection cycle of limitation that right there I'd like everybody took that everybody I meet everybody I know in the whole world to understand I 10 cycles 10 stages of a cycle of limitation and there's a theme rejection brings in it happens to you enough times that you can't you come into agreement with it this is what happens it's what happens to me this is what people do to me all the time see this is what happens the problem is is now you're looking for it you look out for and rejection wants to be fulfilled it wants to continue to prove itself hi you're not loved you're not wanted they're rejecting you so ask yourself about your relationships and there's some like sub questions you could ask underneath that how do you go about feeling loved in the first place do you got to do a bunch of things you got to accomplish something do you got to feel productive do you got to achieve then you'll feel loved then you'll feel great how do you get your value what makes you feel valuable what makes you feel wanted I would feel like two I would pose this this just came to me about people that are constantly like over-exaggerating aches and pain for attention to of like do you feel like you have to have something wrong with you all the time just to even feel love from people right it's a big one nowadays too you know and where the rubber meets the road is what is your relationship filter like so when when something happens real or perceived you know something happens like what you expected in a relationship and what happened there's like a gap in between right and what's the gap how you translate it I called them they didn't call me back I said hello they didn't say hello back I texted they didn't text me back text in time they say right I gave them a present they didn't say thank you I whatever I'm just throwing some things out what's the translation that you come into a group come on we all do this this is crazy we all do it right you you you you I hold a meeting when I used to do leadership meetings right it's like you have the chronic late people oh that was me right they don't care about what I'm doing they don't even care one bit they don't think this is important they don't think it's valuable now I could just often get coffee well I it it's interesting because I feel tested this and I would sit down with those people who were late right and realize I had compassion was like wow there there's some legitimate things going on here and had compassion on I was all in mind they're not respecting me they're not coming on time which being on time is something totally to be respected absolutely so rejection is one of the top narrative twisters it will give you a story on people and and and the story sounds good and you tell everyone you come into contact with this happen this happens to you keep that story going and it's like it's okay to share what happened to you I'm not saying it's not okay but then it owns you and then you look for it and then now you're in that limitation cycle and you can't break free from it so we're all in a place of realizing when it comes to you experiencing love and living in love and knowing who you are those two areas we all have areas that need the healing work of God and we always will till Jesus comes back so relax take a deep breath it's okay but have patience with yourself yeah Jesus said he it is finished his work was finished on the cross but he's spending a lifetime with us accomplishing what he paid for and in a journey and we need to be more okay with the process versus beating ourselves up that were not a finished product coz that that is what rejection tells you to Matt hey you weren't you weren't healed three years ago you weren't free of this why are you you're 50 and you're still dealing with this you know that kind of stuff pressure pressure pressure pressure it's all rejection garbage and understand the rejection mindset is a jerk it's a total jerk bully just every angle to to to mess with you how be and I feel like I just went to church today no you brought us some some really great things and I think for those of you that are listening to this and you feel blessed by it you know please share this don't share it with somebody inside here you need it but I feel like that you brought out some really crucial and loving things about recognizing how the spirit of rejection works how this mindset works and let's start uncovering it so that we can start healthily walking through relationships with each other because isn't that the goal of being in the body of Christ is having loving relationship with yourself and God and then ultimately walking that out with others and I know anybody that's tuning into this that's what you want so we're speaking to you so share this take it in take notes and we're gonna do a series on this how you browse social media I shut down my social media I had some rejection and I had to shut it down you took a break yeah so oh I think taking breaks on social media so it's so healthy yeah so healthy so needed yeah so you scroll through and rejection wants to create a narrative over body that you know or don't know or whatever and then it gets into like accusation condemnation and judgment cynicism and all right and now you're for hours gone and your house is a mess in your laundry needs to meet right and then you're in la-la land you know so yeah so in the weeks to come we're gonna get into some some roll up our sleeves and relationship stuff we're going to talk about limitations addiction I want to even talk about mental health because this is a cornerstone area for all mental health issues leaders I encourage you to share this with your small group if you're a pastor church leader whoever share it because this is going to move people now into a direction of health and you can utilize the resource get the book it's available on paperback audio Kindle it's also available in it like I said accompaniment training course that you can go through with yourself and those you love that you do your own book on audible which is amazing I believe in doing all my own audiobooks you'll hear my voice so you'll hear it in the way I intended it to be read and walk you through it and and encourage you in that process so please share this episode help us to to launch a new level of healing in people's lives and we look forward to talking about this more and more each week yes definitely thank you everyone god bless you guys love you thank you so much you you

Channel: Mark DeJesus

Views: 14,738

Rating: 4.9218473 out of 5

Keywords: Rejection, Rejection Mindset, Spirit of Rejection

Id: UwL0SADh4FE

Length: 46min 6sec (2766 seconds)

Published: Wed Mar 06 2019