r/TechnicallyTheTruth - Funny Posts V1

[Music] job interviewer it says in your CD that you are quick at mathematics what is 17 times 19 me 36 interviewer that's not even close me but it was quick Aaron it's so hard being a single mom when you have no kids and are a male teenager Frank buckles the last surviving soldier of World War one lived for 110 years and died in 2011 when asked about his secret for long life he simply offered when you start to die don't memes are no statistically more popular than Jesus Christ every day we stray further from God my son just remarked that the face was drawn pretty well but the body was a total fail brilliant observation Alice place is a prepared slide on her microscope but when she looks into it she can't see anything suggest one reason why not she is blind he's getting the F out of there [Music] nursery rhymes with Justin Fletcher no it doesn't I'd really like to hear the reasoning behind women who won't take their husband's last name because my last name is best lifehack avoid red lights by driving at 114 million and 4827 miles per hour this velocity will blue shift them enough to appear green road safety laws prepare to be ignored your app name as young plus something you always carry with you no matter where you go young student loan debt you've never actually watched a full movie because you blink how I made two hundred and ninety thousand dollar selling books only one left in stock order soon if you drink the blow liquid from a magic 8-ball you can see the future trust me my friend Keith did once and said he was gonna die and then he did isn't there a medical condition that makes your breath smell like alcohol alcoholism people with glasses is just people without glasses but with glasses on we've all kicked a pregnant woman before whoa I suck Newton died a virgin that means I have one up on history's greatest scientific genius because I'm not dead if you don't watch a series entirely you are not a true fan if you do watch a series entirely you are not a true fan you are only a true fan if you are powered by electricity have multiple flat blades spin around really fast what are the best NSFW life hacks if you can't reach something on a high shelf at the office just stand on a rolling chair go hands-free now it's the law starting tomorrow getting mugged just say no your other legally cannot take any of your possessions without your consent so I was in my room and I saw a group of tenants just running frantically I felt bad so I made a small house for them out of a cardboard box this technically makes me their landlord that they're my tenants this is my new achievement a human great fantastic that's just a monkey with anxiety this is an intact human nervous system that was dissected by two medical students in 1925 it took them over 1500 hours there are only four of these in the world there are seven billion of these in the world - the guy who stole my antidepressants I hope you're happy now let's see what Schauer thought we can pass off as a mean today if you were born after 1945 you are literally named after Hitler people who have a kink for girls per say what makes it heart internal body temp most kids on this Web site don't even know what this is that's a coffee table damn it Williams stop playing video games at work in a second I just have to fight this boss alright I'm back some fella ordered the new Liverpool shirt from China for his light and asked for a number six on the back by mistake he asked them to change it to 14 instead he has no legs climbs ever rest what's your Excuse his legs won't hurt mine will your car keys have travelled further than your car [Music] if Christians read the Bible to get closer to God what do a theist read to further intensify their non belief the same actually do y'all remember before the internet that people thought the cause of stupidity was the lack of access to information yeah it wasn't that new DND character skeleton in a fur suit that's called an animal just overheard a little boy called Rhino's warrior unicorns and my mind is blown being kissed in your sleep 'yes like the purest form of love unless you are home alone why don't you mans have a specific noise that means there are bees here let's leave immediately why are elephants more advanced than us we do have a specific noise it sounds like this there are bees here let's leave immediately suicide is not the answer it is the question the answer is yes the great thing about suicide is that the more suicidal people there are the less societal people there are I found this coupon apparently it's good for five dollars off anything at any store need a new scientific study claims that fertility is hereditary if your parents didn't have any children chances are you won't either how much would a trip to Spain cost it depends where you live for example if you live in Spain it's free what's above Tennessee yeah what's the state above Tennessee gasps I swear sometimes I feel like I'm married to a child what who you're calling a child because if I'm a child you know what that makes you a pedophile and I'll be damned if I'm gonna stand here and be lectured by a pervert my apple doesn't play my Spotify for some reason that's a peach you freaking [ __ ] hey don't wait for me I'm at the hospital is everything okay I'm okay it's just my cousin he can't speak or walk oMG what frickin happened nothing serious he was just born two hours ago what will always get you laid necrophilia 911 is basically 11:9 in every other country but America isn't it weird how we pay money to see other people you mean prostitution concerts or the movies glasses I love how simple acts upset when new facet eyes as if he didn't just do a choreographed musical number called I just can't wait to be king I like your name thanks I got it for my birthday how do you want your hair done like this done I'm dating a half asian girl her mom is Korea and her dad is also Korea her legs were ripped off in a car accident you telling me Julius Caesar who has been dead for well over 70 years made this salad technically you are wrong with that number but I just hate it Wikipedia crashed send us a crash report what were you doing when the crash happened eating a bean and cheese taco your heartbeat is probably perfectly synchronized with someone else's especially if you are dead structure of a butt cheeks crack therapist your wife says you never buy her flowers is that true then to be honest I never knew she sold flowers boys who can pull off facial hair are hot I think you're supposed to use a razor what's your name Peter without an F but there's no F and Peter that's what I said twenty-one Savage says he's sitting on two albums of unreleased music I'ma be honest that looks like a chair I'm now an anti-vaxxer because vaccines are the leading cause of adults and those annoying pieces of a frickin everywhere Superman should no longer be white Superman shouldn't be white because it never completely made sense to begin with the blacks already have a successful superhero can we latinus get Superman if you are gonna be changing character races he technically is an illegal alien anyway what's something you think about often if a nickname is what people call you for short then your full name is your Nicholas name many top scientists are on the autism spectrum so technically autism causes vaccines this pool is shaped like Colorado Roman numerals still effective you've been visited by the safety dog Oh LIKE this video and subscribe to be safe from all danger

Channel: Clumsy

Views: 2,507,316

Rating: 4.9428453 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, technically the truth, r/technicallythetruth, funny

Id: mwCIaat4Ak0

Length: 10min 0sec (600 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 19 2019