r/Prorevenge They Took My Dog, So I Took Their Kids

welcome to r pro revenge where op goes full john wick our next reddit post is from phillip hamilton this happened when i was around 12 or 13 so the details might be a little skewed most of my childhood the house right next to ours has been condemned and abandoned the property owners were willing to sell the land for 200 that's how bad it was eventually someone bought it and threw a manufactured home on it to replace the condemned home soon a nice old man moved in next door and we didn't pay too much attention to him because he kept to himself that was until his daughter moved in with him soon our quiet little neighborhood turned into an episode of white trash and trouble the daughter would fight her spouse about every little thing and keep my family along with our neighbors up half the night their kids were the worst part of all we never knew how many kids lived in that house because so many different kids and adults were in and out of there all the time me and my siblings tried to become friends with them but we ended up being more of their babysitters they would come over to our house and each of my siblings had a group of three to four year old kids to watch over these kids would walk in uninvited into our house then steal toys and games from our rooms honestly they stole stuff from all over our house but this was the main area they would either take our toys for themselves or throw our toys in our backyard river they would constantly run in and out of our house even if no one was with them they would steal all the fruit in the basket that my mom left for us my mom confronted them about it and their three-year-old son called her a b word the parents refused to apologize for their behavior saying stuff like if you loved your things so much then you wouldn't have let them take it or don't parent my kid one thing they would specifically do with me is they pulled on my hair all the time i'm a tomboy and they would just call me a boy and a wig because girls can't play with skateboards girls can't play with ninja action figures or any other gender stereotype they would constantly bombard me because they truly didn't know girls were allowed to play with anything they wanted one of their heavier kids stole my skateboard and jumped on it breaking it in half then they said i shouldn't have been playing with a skateboard anyway there are plenty more examples but i think you get the point the neighbors decided that because our house was nicer they had permission to run an electrical line from our house to theirs which in itself is a bad thing but they decided to run up our electric bill to triple the cost of our original we were lower middle class and below the poverty level so we couldn't afford that kind of bill the rule in our house is if you're not using it then turn it off that's why my parents were awfully surprised to see an 800 electric bill eventually a person from our electric company came out to our house to see what was happening they found an extension cord running to our neighbor's house the electrician simply unplugged it and said that should be the end of that problem my mom politely but sternly warned the neighbors that this was not okay the neighbor had a small adult tantrum about it and cussed my mom out but eventually she went back to her house my mom was obviously not pleased with her behavior but tried not to escalate the situation any further our neighbors tried a few more times to run the line from our house to theirs each time we unplugged it they would cuss us out and send their kids over to destroy something else in our home eventually my mom straight up told them that if they come to our property again she would call the police and press charges we could still be quote friends with their kids but they weren't allowed on our land they decided that because we won't let them use our electricity that the next best option was to steal our dog from our backyard and claim that our dog attacked her kids even though our dog was completely harmless and cows at everything due to the bad owners before us so the pound came and took our dog away by the time my brothers and i got home my dog was already gone we just assumed she ran off with our grandmothers who lived down the street when my parents came home they about lost it learning that our dog was missing by the time we found her at the pound they were putting her up for adoption my parents had to re-adopt our dog because we didn't claim them in time we even had her tags that say that she belongs to us the pound told us why the dog was taken and my mom said that enough was enough now the revenge when my mom got home she sent my little brother over to their house to play with their kids my brother became a little spy that day his job was to look around their house and report anything that could be suspicious we learned from him that they were sitting three kids to a twin bed the entire house was cramped and dirty the old man who lived there was hardly home because he couldn't stand his adult daughter who lived there all around the kids were being neglected with the information that my brother gathered my mom called child protective services on their home within a month all the kids minus the one that the old man cared for were removed from the home while i agreed that the foster system was bad it was definitely better than what they were going through in that house the mother of those kids started to fight with the old man on everything because her kids were no longer there as a distraction her own father was to be your next victim the old man was eventually fed up with her and kicked her out of the home all that was left in the home was the old man and the grandson he was fostering they're both very kind and amazing neighbors too long didn't read karen took our dog so we took her kids clearly karen has never watched john wick you never ever mess with another person's dog our next reddit post is from e is for elbow smash this slow burn starts a full year and a half before my plan came into effect earlier in the year my dad quite sensibly suggested that with the size of our family christmas party we skip a generation with the gifts to ease the financial strain as the extended family grew at the time i was struggling with my business and athletic career and my wife was working on her second master's degree so i suggested drawing names from a hat but my father wanted to spoil all of his grandchildren i said fair enough i'll chip in for my grandma's cruise and buy gifts from my step siblings but don't expect anything grand the dramatist personae for this christmas party are me a 28 year old heavyweight mixed martial artist and strength coach martha my 40 year old stepsister an aging mom whose only assets are starting to sag too much for them to be assets anymore leaving her with no other definable personality traits jane who's martha's 12 year old daughter imagine the most vapid teenager stereotype you can and multiply it by a thousand tim martha's nine-year-old son he's living proof that you're never too young to be a butthole robert my 36 year old step brother he was formerly a cool dude who gave up on his life when his kids were born years later he would gain back enough willpower and gumption to physically assault his wife tammy my stepbrother six-year-old daughter a sweet and shy girl terrified by my mere presence the wisest of the bunch in my opinion bubba my seven-year-old step brother son a generally nice kid who at this time was part way into evolving into a butthole after being constantly told to look up to and emulate tim his older half brother tammy had brought a nintendo ds with her and all the kids were struggling to see it and play it together so i foolishly offered to loan the mind to lighten the load tammy agrees to share with jane and bub agrees to share with tim having stupidly deprived myself of my means to escape social obligations i go to the living room to acquire that much older cure for not wanting to deal with other people alcohol not even having time to pour my trained ear picks up from the kids room the unmistakable sound of one human being pummeling another i politely suggest to my stepbrother robert that he might want to go have a look but my step row hasn't given an f about anything in about seven years so he waves it off and i go to investigate i walk in to see that tim may be a butthole but he isn't untalented and has managed to strike shove into a wall and kick bubba all at the same time while attempting to play my ds with his other hand having apparently decided that his turn began the moment that i left the room jane had simply wrestled the ds from tammy who is now sitting in the corner crying i shout for martha informing her that if she doesn't get in here to break things up before i count to 10 i would have a stern conversation with them martha turns up and separates the kids and i retrieve my ds instead of giving tim a lesson on sharing and not hitting people she proceeds to berate bubba the kid who was beaten for not simply giving up the ds to her little piece of garbage and making her son look bad jane simply lets out a tween age side for the ages and tosses the other diaz to the crying tammy i then excuse myself from the party thinking whatever gods may be that i don't have to provide gifts for any of these little turds six months later my firm belief in atheism is confirmed when my brother robert calls me in this conversation ensues heyop while i really appreciate the gifts last year you should really get something for the kids this year instead christmas is all about the children after all no i turn up to have conversations with you and dad about my grandma i really don't give two flips about the kids that's a mean thing to say about my kids don't you care about them you cared about them so much that at the last party you couldn't be bothered to break up a fight where your son was being beaten bloody tim is a good kid martha said he just had a bad day he was literally beating your child you didn't put pictures on social media for a week because of the bruises if tim were an adult and tried that i would have pinned him to the floor until the cops arrived well my wife and i were talking and we think you should buy stuff for the kids next year instead of us well i'm happy to not buy you anything but i'm not getting anything from martha's little turds especially when she encourages that behavior well if you aren't going to get something for all the kids you shouldn't get anything at all it's not right if you don't treat them equally done a few months later about two weeks before christmas i get an email from my dad with links to various toys when i call him back to ask what that's all about this conversation ensues hey what's up i got your email what is this all about those are gifts for the kids for christmas that's cool if you're getting them that i'll see them when the kids open them no that's for you to get them i don't buy gifts for that generation remember and i already sent you my contribution for grandma's cruise you need to get stuff for the kids don't you want them to look up to you as an uncle not really also what part of my life suggests to you they ought to look up to me as some sort of a role model you'd be better off telling them to grow up to be rock stars not the point christmas is about the children if you don't get them this stuff i won't put your name on that card for grandma that's a sucky thing to do considering that i already paid into that will you get the stuff or not well i guess my name isn't going on the card then all these toys will cost me more than a month's rent so you can take this list and shove it calm your jets this is what they want i'll get them a token something but i'm not taking out a loan fine just make it something they enjoy if what i get doesn't put a giant smile on each and every one of their faces i'll buy you dinner at a steakhouse of your choosing that's the spirit talk to you later so christmas rolls around and my wife and i have bought not just one but four gifts for each of the little ones and wrapped them all beautifully my dad correctly assumes they're all from the dollar store but they're nicely wrapped and he gives me a look of approval as i place them under the tree my wife and i schmoozed for a bit and then suggested since we brought several guests for each of the kids why don't they open one each before dinner so they have something to do while they wait their parents of course agree as it gives him more of a reason to ignore their kid so they send us off to hand out gifts to their kids martha is looking especially smug as they begin to unwrap the presents i prepare the camera as my wife goes for our coats and i stick around just long enough to immortalize on film the huge grins on each of the kids faces if they see what the gift is less than one minute later the first blast from the air horn tim's gift can be clearly hurt in the hallway as my wife and i make for the elevator i have no idea how much of the bulk pack of silly string and tammy's gift or the 36 rainbow pack of off-brand sharpies bubba's gift ended up on the walls but i do know they repainted the place the next month jane got a stack of slap-on bracelets and i like to think that her parents all ended up in the height of 80's fashion before the evening was over i may never know if they opened the rest of their presents everyone got a copy of each other's gifts you know for fairness plus a bunch of gross and mildly inappropriate temporary tattoos in the confusion none of them noticed me and my wife leaving i'm certain at some point they did notice the pretty gold envelope addressed to the parents on the tree inside was a very pretty card with the following note this was a warning shot from off the top of my head i've got a whole year to get creative for the next time merry christmas signed op you know the ironic thing op is that any 8 to 12 year old kid would love these gifts so while i'm sure the parents were annoyed with you i bet the kids thought of you as like a hero uncle that was our slash pro revenge and if you like this content check out my patreon where i publish extra episodes also hit that subscribe button because i put out new reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 493,780

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, prorevenge, r/prorevenge, pro revenge

Id: JhJDqBCpDzQ

Length: 13min 23sec (803 seconds)

Published: Sun Jan 03 2021