Room 101 S6 E6

[Music] member hello I'm Frank Skinner and welcome to room 101 the show where three guests compete to condemn their deepest dislikes to the dreadful room 101 they'll have to argue their case well because in each round only one item can be chosen the final decision is mine let's meet this week's guest joining me tonight are king of the North Island Cochran Queen of the South Gabby Logan and rich is the nerd Richard Ayoade II okay let's get ready to grumble and let's see what's upsetting Gabby Logan half and half footballs gone Frank yeah they are a recent phenomena I would say only in the last six or seven seasons that they have become a thing to the point now where there is almost on a premiering feature that goes by where people don't feel the need to be pedaling and therefore other people buying these half-and-half scarves I have tried hard to work out if there is a justification for the reason why they should exist and I shouldn't be quite so angry about and I can't think of anything the whole point of football is to be parochial to be a tribal to be committed to a team in your area and it's just it's wishy-washy it's indecisive it has a lack of commitment and they've got to go so some people could argue I suppose that it suggests a lack of aggression and and that party's an thing and there's love in the room I love both these teams I want to both it's very well but I hate that - check sorry these things mopped up on a match by match basis yeah so watch your knitwear bill I just can't think of anybody who grow up in Liverpool and be a massive read that's a little full photo no I'd be no don't you get any commie fascist guy okay I don't know they both seem extreme ideology Liverpool actually you've got the best half and a scarf I've ever seen which is this one except you see because that what that means really it says they're only two teen yeah and I think there is another team called Elvis's shut up yep for the same town yeah they're good aren't they it's strange to me that the Dom for the scarf was the half and half souvenir of knitwear you'd think gloves would lend themselves because then any surplus that are not sold could be rematched to an opposite you Liverpool or United game yes and thus they cut down on waste I'm going to tell which is it's got two hands white white and and not white and it's got a fight on one side ah and I can't I think elbow on the other okay anyway and you use it and accordingly which at least has got a practical message behind it the thing is you know these great rivalries that we have in football in this country obviously you know the local derbies rivalries and you Castle against someone's you've got it Scotland obviously Glasgow Rangers against Glasgow Celtic Liverpool and the idea that you would have okay so I Sevilla go back to the Premier League okay the idea that you have a scarf as ask them better on one side in West Bromwich Albion on the other must fill you with delight the ideal it's not be similar to this and I am what about what do you think indecent this version of the half and half if it's a sort of romantic version ah together since 2014 to me that looks like together and she was 14 and it had started when he was 20 but you should not be applauding now the problem with that though is if he wears it's the fiber side and she's busy it just looks weird now he mentioned his name is Paul together oh oh so Paul together now yeah I got wind and one's a NASCAR fan and one Birdman they couldn't you know there you've got half and half children yeah God but the idea that they would get together and have a scarf made well I am I I went to West Brom Manchester City and they lost for nil a home to Manchester City and there was a period when we actually had the ball for a bit and the fans started going we've got the ball we've got the ball we've got we've lost the ball they kept that going for about 20 minutes remained as pressure on the players Oh I feel that should be the themes are not fertile it's basically football commentary but yeah melted down to a quintet that's the Heike version is probably so what's upsetting richard audiences cheering enough the audience is cheering at the name of the town in which they resign I don't quite I just don't see why you need to emit that sound I mean mate you know I'm from it's wit so obviously I can't emit joy so it seems very strange to me I've never understood it you say hold on I don't know what's meant to do that information are you happy about how happy okay I think it's the form of missionary work okay if that man saying you probably think it's terrible coming from home exactly right hey okay I'll skip nappy selling hole at the ground set yeah I mean it's not a long pitch the hole it makes me feel like everyone's being hypnotized and someone said when your town's name is mentioned obviously you'll have to go away and sometime and they've never been snapped back out of it it would make life difficult I mean you obviously stand up and you know perform in front of an audience you do that you all do that and actually it's the easiest way to get a few people on side yeah you know mention of town but let's specify here because I feel we're may be getting off on the wrong foot I'm not talking about the response to a specific inquiry addressing audience where they live hooray it's a fine response we can't all say nine of us are from Preston yeah what I find odd is the mere mention of the name in the Pavlovian sent a little thinner ray seems odd because why should that only a piston crowd you should follow it through anytime when you're on your own if you see one in a nap then say it it would be on a few on your own there and you're watching the news and this evening we're bringing news meseta lakhs and whole way we're going to do it follow it through follow through don't just sit for doing the public play yeah I think you could have a clause not after the announcement of a fatal accident that would be reasonable that's the thing is when I first started in comedy which is um before the old King died I always what you doing people to say I'm a plumber or something of that nature and then they say to me I'm a consultative HR area managerial cooperative officer yeah and then I say where you're from and they say we can decide did you come on a track that gets a big laugh yeah it's a business area it's more the spontaneous woop when a town is mentioned because and also its existing in a group dynamic because conversationally if I were to say so I went to it switch and you anyway in a group of less than four yeah I don't know when it becomes alright to say hey if they're a critical mass what if it was just me in useful yeah Walter you just mention it switch okay yeah I get this gig in its way okay so what's up second Alan [Applause] advice Frank is it's what I'd like to put in room 101 because I think maybe I'm arrogant but when people say I've got some advice here I often just think nah some other but a lot of advice is terrible like I mean when you start it up a whole life it's probably about three bits that are ready used some one of them's yellow snow and the rest of it I just think is waffle like bad bad advice friend told me friend told me that he was told when he was younger dress for the job you want not for the job you've got if you heard that that's apparently business advice and people think it's good it's not he is serving a custodial sentence respectively impersonating a police officer I think it's bad advice I'm trying to remember if I've ever given Alan if any advice by a cook big comedian too especially like you know elder statesman comics like myself sometimes I remember an American comic so he said I'll give you I'll say something about stand-up comedy and I thought we could be honest it always take your wallet onstage sensible and another guy in English is a magician actually and he said to me I was very nervous and I'll tell you something France he said and so when you get a BMW and you will get power assisted steering that into comedy advice that I've had from my whole career that's been my dad gave he was big on advice my dad he told me to keep salt in my pocket so that if anyone approached me after dark in the street I should throw it in their faces I think that's good advice I'm going to make that for ya but you're getting a whole lifetime and also if you need to grips know it short notice if I even tell me the method he said what you would do is if someone come out of and said that give me your wristwatch you go I'll look I don't want any trouble I'll just because he wants their eyes to be you know yeah make sure they're ultra don't give them any kind of hint and then you will you pass that advice on to your um no because we got you know nice and soft man I mean you got to move at the time okay now everyone uses see fall you have to just crumble it in their eyes Jamie Oliver from when I was a young man I was in a pub and a man told me if ever a adult bites you and locks its jaws put your finger up its bottom and it and what he said I base to cutting eggs ventriloquist act on it in the AP Frank Skinner and Bongo remember it it does that work just for that particular point because if it bites again you can do it again just it's not like a B where it's like um it is I know but I'm just at some stage you've got to get that finger back out yeah and then where are you using that no but like they open their mouth yeah but you've got it open yeah but now's the noid yeah yeah well I don't need to stay on the matter and if these are annoyed or quite attached we're sorry that started a dialogue yeah it does I've seen it work are you okay so um I'm glad of any kind of cheering applause I can get at any gig so I don't want to close down any areas so ah so you know that's okay advice I mean one get one does get good advice and I know he's been on the ground but when you get it can be really brilliant and uplifting and so I could just um put in all the vice however the half and half staff I think is probably what's gone wrong with Great Britain and Europe and and so I'm going to put half and half jump into Romano [Applause] like y'all on the girl with Gabby Logan people who are afraid of flying which sounds like I have no empathy and I'm very intolerant and it sounds like I don't care I don't actually sit next to me on a flight okay I've had a few of them lately right and you bought the ticket you know how it works you know we were getting on a plane we're going somewhere it cannot be a surprise to you that we are going to take off you've not watched the 18 I am I've had a few bad experiences the last 12 months mrs. brought us through ahead and I was on my way to Newcastle just a quick hop quick hop from London up to Newcastle and the lady sat next to me in the middle she sat down and she pulled a coat office she started kind of rubbing herself in an almost sexual manner and I thought what's going on here and then she starts expressing a bit and she started rocking and I thought we have somebody who's scared of flying so I'm going to just I'm going to be there for her so I start off with a lot of compassion and would you like some water or I find a fight a fight a fight I'm one of us I wanted one of us one of us one of us so or a plane but I said that's better because this is a lot safer than being on a bus you are far more likely to die being on a bus for the plane you're in a good place right now so well let's go Guinness so she carries on with the toffee and I said look I give this advice for anybody I sit next to you scared of flying and it says have you ever met anybody who's had a little shunt at 35,000 feet and she said no well I could know that because they died so logic and they didn't occur to you that dying might be the thing she was afraid [Music] because that is a legitimate fear the only time I've been concerned about clashing if I was on a flight with Ant & Dec and it did occur to me that if the plane went down they would get top billing in there right the headline would be anthem debt die and then rami comedian also parachute and that I must I think I was glad when we got off that plane I understand that people might you know might have a enough prehension about it but I don't see why anymore that they would have enough friends about getting on the bus or getting into people don't go getting in the car and getting in the car the kinds much more dangerous from the plane oh it is in fact it is it's not it is also I do do that before I get into car it's a lot more likely that you're going to die in a car accident than a plain answer no no what you mean is it's a lot more likely that you're going to have a car accident but it is a lot more likely that you're going to die in a plane accident yeah yeah no can I give you some statistics the year the u.s. National Transport Safety Board did a survey of commercial airlines and this the odds of dying in a plane crash they are a one foot in every 1.2 million flight and this is what makes is made out of the planes that do crash ninety six point seven percent of passengers survived what yes the old testing isn't even any comfort we may crash and there's a good chance we're going to survive this bloody thing not the odds of dying in a plane crash are 1 in 11 million those are the two height of me apparently stewardesses often survive because they are protected by the hardened shell of their makeup he is the man now this this man was on an aeroplane and it was said and he drank all of his duty free liquor on the flight from Iceland to JFK and in the end he attacked a woman fast on other passengers and screamed the plane was going to crash and so they duct-taped him and to his seat he now I wonder if that plane crash maybe he might be the only person who survived and we'd all discovered that is actually the safest way to travel okay so what's winding up Allen Cochran it's peaceful laughing out loud when reading a book and it's especially people near me laughing out loud when reading a book I don't know why it grinds my gears quite as much but that thing of like yeah alright we get it we can all read I think there's a bit of show-off eNOS like yeah yeah I'm reading a book I think I've read loads of books but I'm not showing off about it it's just a self aggrandizing show ah penis no you need to read more book you say something buddy we got ha ha but if somebody's written something funny I feel like you should type low or write down laughs I just need to get a notebook to the side of the book get go lie yeah you can have marginalia Yeah right har har next the thing I think that's a perfectly appropriate response and I think like there's a bit of people reading in public going oh I'm reading if I'm on a train and somebody near me but ha ha ha ha I just think get a room read this in the comfort of your own okay yeah that's fine because it's not an assault on me living my life this is what extraneous noise it is to me really audible laughter yeah maybe it's other people's tangible existence that you don't mind yeah I just find it very irritating I'm surprised that it's getting so much resistance because I thought this is a thing I read that an autobiography recently and I really laughed out loud on several occasions which you would condemn me for Levi ever fails by through reading mine so it was actually my yeah this is one of the pluses of age-related memory line you were laughing now I laughed at loaded properly funny my wife now now funny yeah Fran Skinner no that's not going to have the time in fact as a recommendation I laughed out loud while rereading it there's nothing there government you know have you ever seen the the thumb thing by the way no the song thing is that it's a special gadget for reading book and this is what this is what the blurb said ever relaxed on the beach with a book likely you held the book in front of your face with your thumb to block the Sun from your eyes few minutes lie to your thumb gets tired and the book smacks you in the face never happened but the some thing is invented for that so you get your book and and you can hold it like that and it does give you if you can see that it gives you a lot of extra support good it's a simple thing but so many of the best inventions are mmm how's it doing great know that the invention is it selling well oh sorry busy selling is pretty well is that funny I am I've never actually I have really and if you were offended at someone laughing on a tribe we should have been there when I read that there are some books which I would be edgy about reading on a train would you read Fifty Shades of Grey on a train no no what about this format I'd like to read this on a train and every now and again they're female passages ago any lot listen how did you find that book and with it Amazon recommend it yeah people who bought this you also like I got one of those hi gran we thought you might like exactly everyone's got a new story on a newsfeed I am and it said here is a story you might like and it was um a couple who'd been eaten by cannibals while on holiday fun elegantly I'd locked her I would read this on a try something brilliant about that I would have thought that with the least of their problems there you have a footprint if they did a look at that but they did offset a lot of it with tree yeah respect for them just on that point I mean generally right Oh and so to Richard I don't understand it I don't know whether it's possible and I think if you described something else fun that's the bad thing it trivializes it any if you think of anything you actually like and if you were to describe it to someone else I don't know that you'd use the word fun it seems to be quite a word that's only really appropriate for describing a wham video and only some of them and also every time someone has said this is going to be fun you know they're lying sorry I mean if someone says this will be tolerable I know I'm there that's one of my Jacqueline yeah I mean that to me is the boat when I first it's the most concrete example of on that one can get is this this is a pond side yard Bob which suggests that your standard Martha is a bit of a slog what they're saying is if we take that that if when you're eating a mars bar that the steep section of it is actually fun yeah after that it's about knuckling down and just getting the job done not a slight for a lot of times when you think something's going to be fun it absolutely isn't a type take me for example [Music] I think that's a very potent symbol about funnel yeah turns out yeah I think the dad film in it is having great fun some people don't even want to be seen to be having fun I'm not saying you're in this category Richard but look at this guy right so document hits on oil that moment he was connecting to the performer okay we come to the end of that round and I don't think you comfort people afraid of flying in because that's their have they've got enough problems they're probably also claustrophobic that's what I'm in the vault they'll tell us people laughing out loud when they read a book and I sort of respect the fact that anyone left to read the book any reaction they get I don't mind and if it's my I ask them people reading my book and laughing but and it was in the mirror fun I see what on the way we're talking about it at fun words Lee let's have fun Radio one road show fun yeah that kind of fun yeah I do I know you're right I don't like it I'm gonna put fun into room when I want yeah [Applause] and that brings us 300 show well done Gabi you were the most precise of guests so you are this week's winner thanks very much our Cochran's Gabby Logan and wicked eye awardee and thank you goodnight more alive a comedy coming up as Lee and Lucy find the funny side of marriage guidance next and then Adele way too happy a Nicola Sturgeon planning world domination in Tracey Ullman Show at 9:30

Channel: Laroceht

Views: 131,825

Rating: 4.8086696 out of 5

Keywords: Richard Ayoade, Alun Cochrane, Gabby Logan, Frank Skinner, Room 101

Id: Nsbsh54NybY

Length: 28min 53sec (1733 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 24 2017