Resident Evil Village is Bullying Me

just uh so you guys know the reason why i haven't started yet is because i'm finishing a bowl of corn mmm corn yeah i just have a bowl of corn i also uh realized something that could have really really sped up last stream i think everyone knows and i'm very embarrassed that i realized that after my stream that i didn't once i didn't once [ __ ] sprint don't worry i was just um i was doing uh irl roleplay of how that would actually make you super tired if you ran everywhere uh and i have a a bad i have even more bad news while also realizing that you can sprint i still yet have to figure out how to sprint anyways uh as per quo i'm joined by my friends did you know did you know did you know did you know that you can spray no tell me more wow if you press the r3 button r3 be able to move don't i don't know i actually don't know yeah i believe it is the l3 button yes anyways here you guys go guys this is what dying feels like gonna catch me rotten dirty oh man i miss you already i miss her big titties i miss her big ass i miss her non-existent legs ladies is nothing in comparison to the absolute size of gru you know what i think i'm over it i think i think i'm over dimitrescu all right everything's loading in hello wait okay let's figure it out yeah you don't have your memory card start from the beginning yep that is definitely a run button but i mean like we've made it this far and we only died once you know is it really necessary do we want to get rid of the dimitrescu it has so much worth it's not going to have any use besides from sentimental values so i say uh can the [ __ ] yeah but we can at least keep the lipstick to remind us of the time that she drank our blood we discovered that our daughter's head was inside of the piss jar that's another thing right the piss jar baby wait oh no oh hey hello hello mother miranda she looks like a thumb in a chesty cage all right let me through hello back in werewolf town back in tomato time now we're heading southbound but little did we know we were not the ones setting southbound does he not have a flashlight of some kind well no he he only turns it on when he wants to i see it's context sensitive because letting the player do something would be stupid if you were collectible where would you be hiding under the bed no oh rough seriously why do i keep hearing what the [ __ ] wait can i open this now oh okay never mind because the gate was like no no recorded by nh who's nh nathan nathan hrig yeah that's exactly what i was thinking who the [ __ ] is hanging around out here oh these guys literally just jesus oh my god it's me there's like five billion oh that's good i'm not as scared of them as i am of the werewolves because they kind of just look like idiots not your bullets oh jesus the pims are free wait is that a zombie pig oh my god like in minecraft holy [ __ ] man oh it is oh god why did you shoot it it's not a zombie b it's just vibing how is it still alive now you have a has a bullet wound in it you know it's not happening he's not having a great time like not bad just a normal pig hanging around explo i'm excuse me explosive rounds for what rocket launcher now you just throw them arms out for a hug that will never come don't leave a broken weight get back to the office oh that's a fish oh [ __ ] fish oh my god you're a killer fog fish give these to the duke but why i caught them they're mine they are my fish i caught all right well i have no time for you so uh hey guys boom holy [ __ ] god i have no time for this [ __ ] i'm here to find my daughter in the jars i need to collect all of my daughter jars and then i will be able to open the magic portal oh my god he's really going in on that uh that tiramisu listen i have a [ __ ] giant ass gun i'm not that scared anymore that's me eating chicken nuggiest hi ethan what's your favorite food i'm ethan wait until the day that some like a walking werewolf is or like a lincoln what they call it a lincoln lychen lichen speaking of werewolves everybody like and subscribe oh god hey hey that guy didn't like in that joke very much okay all right who's ready to eat my ass today let's go oh maybe i mean wait hey that's what we call a return on investment maybe not maybe i won't do a coward you won't wait which window which window there's a few windows there's windows 1 windows 2 windows vista windows 10. oh my god [Music] that was actually a really that was actually a really good job scare all goes that was so good you likans i liken you to a [ __ ] dead person don't [ __ ] up this time oh my god this is going into the montage into the epic montage let's go resident evil epic snipes warning you will jizz [ __ ] and then jumping off it oh [ __ ] [ __ ] where did it go oh we're making some bacon bacon bacon bacon it's eating i mean it's just eating blood it's just chilling i mean it hurt me once shame on me where did it come from uh it's penis probably yep [ __ ] max yeah maybe now's a good time to shut up okay [Laughter] you [ __ ] i ain't done it you have something to say for yourself nerd holy [ __ ] jesus didn't even give him a chance what the [ __ ] oh what's in the toilet the lock pick cool uh yes that's where i keep all my why don't we just kick in the door oh sorry oh hi i love how you said sorry yeah you apologized to the werewolf that was like gonna eat you the best part is that you said sorry after you shot that's a [ __ ] that's a very nice one though oh someone left a large crystal in this toilet what's up in there hey hold on am i gonna do it for the meme i might do it don't watch guys oh man you left something really explosive and that's what we call explosive diarrhea yeah unfortunately if this wasn't a resident evil game that might work hey [Music] all right so how many monsters are gonna be in my way oh god so many at least three he works in his factory on the village outskirts making blue meth i love eisenberg yeah that's [ __ ] awesome dude i love breaking bad oh ooh necklace with two holes totally specific if my name was necklace i would be that [ __ ] god i want three holes i want to be like a bowling ball excuse me usually like a bowling ball please stick two fingers in my nose and one in my mouth and just roll me don't you dare i was told that this part coming up is much worse than every other part of the game worse how like actually scary dolls dolls dogs [ __ ] hate dolls yes dollhorn they can talk to you they can move they can make you regret ever existing or being born nothing i ain't already used to oh i swear is this a metal gear solid 3 reference oh shut up [Music] oh pog wife dude finally we can get this dick wet let's go mia good dog she's not real dumb never [ __ ] believe it i think we're in a horror game ethan oh how about i don't this is the button to go down shoot the button by shooting the button that's not even how that should work you're amazing ethan hello oh that is dangerous but also very cool and also it's probably also very loud in there everybody's like i want to have a house next to a waterfall do you know how [ __ ] deafening noisely that [ __ ] waterfall is so but if you're a person who like actively has a doll like that i think you deserve to be shot on site shoot the painting as a warning the same player yeah this is where the bad ideas start coming in the dark hallway with the torn wallpaper is really doing it for me right now i will feel much more ease with a chat guy i think that maybe uh if twitch chat uh gifts a million subs uh chen will be get over her sphere hey can i get 100 gifted subs i need therapy we gotta get this power social [ __ ] going all the top youtubers are doing it i'm very freaked out by no music or noises yeah it's definitely it's a it's definitely a fat mood not a fan of this i'm gonna be quite oh man long hallways man oh god i haven't seen i haven't looked at the whole way the same way since pt there's so many okay i'm gonna break through you have a gun you're fine she's gonna talk oh it's the yeah it's the little girl oh well there goes our piss jaw welcome to freddie fazbear's pizzeria wait where's my gun oh and she took oh come on seriously that's cute it has a wedding ring yeah it took you like five million years to do that i was gonna sit up and be like hey yo what the [ __ ] that's my ring you're not gonna lie this is definitely how i this is how i pleasure my wife oh [ __ ] we can play the piano nice no way i mean i guess it makes sense they took away our guns so [ __ ] [ __ ] ethan control yourself you must breathe we're going out last in this [ __ ] i wasn't scared until they took my safety away yeah funny how that works do you think i'll be less scared if i take off my headphones maybe all right i'm taking off my headphones all right oh the [ __ ] games begin oh i'm not scared of you i'm not scared of you i'm scared of myself i love this one oh yeah was just like fuzzy nah man this is a it's chalkboard i love a girl i remember this oh this is the origin story yeah yeah that that's that's that's the cradle of a shark boy shark boy was taken away from his cradle a very young age and thrown down a well man this movie sucks yes we sucked like nothing happened oh dude not feeling good about this one gonna be honest yeah me neither they told me that morgan freeman was gonna be in that one oh wait no you meant though yeah are you gonna let a bunch of dolls t-pose on you yes that's the real question wait will this make it better hold on just don't look at me right now hold on you're really playing the [ __ ] head empty mix i mean yeah honestly i've done it before so yeah i'm still going to get scared even by playing this song i know this hello what do you want from me [Music] what are you talking about i love you both so much i had to do it i'm gonna lie the biggest fan of yous gotta be kidding me dude ethan is like hey sir this is my uh emotional support [ __ ] babies [ __ ] babies i hate babies there's nothing bad up here this is where shark boy was tossed down the well okay dude we're gonna meet charcoal shark boy i love you i like your movie i like the special effects you know i know i talk [ __ ] about the movie but you know i didn't really mean it huh ah oh she drowned oh no sharkboy shark boy no the remains of sharkboy he know he didn't survive what a twist oh it's baby time it's baby time it's baby time there's a [ __ ] baby it's like not even a normal baby it's a baby that's like a really buff look chad it's you all right you little [ __ ] come here i ain't scared of you are you scared of a baby a lot of baby t-pose on you nah say that's some baby this in your fly girl just give him one just give one of these is that an umbilical cord i were i'm actually too terrified to continue i'm gonna turn on the light that umbilical cord is long as [ __ ] dude dude mia's [ __ ] be so [ __ ] long what oh oh that's so gross oh freud why'd you have to go and do us like that what the [ __ ] is it doing and that's why you don't have pre-marital sex sorry it actually kind of looks funny yo is that a binding of isaac reference anyway so why was silent hills uh cancelled again konami somewhere like a konami exec is playing this being like what the [ __ ] why did we cancel that [ __ ] game why did we cancel that [ __ ] man we needed that stranding pachinko hey baby monster you wanna play fortnite i got games on my phone mom said it's your turn on the xbox did you did you click on live stream again by accident yes did you mean to join no you didn't yes well actually no i meant to watch the video game on twitch.tv well now you can watch it even more live hey so i have to get to that room over there yeah it's not so bad just go oh god oh it's hit rapper like a well done thing whereas this is like this is like spaghetti sauce bolognese the trail goes cold here ah yes slithered away like a little slug actually i think it'd be more like [Music] well i mean you didn't have to show me up like that man i was just trying to if there's one thing i take seriously it's my sloppy gloppy noises and if there's one thing i take seriously is getting that sloppy gloppy you know what i'm saying oh god oh no bolognese he's back they deleted the [ __ ] thing oh you [ __ ] him scream oh stupid idiot wasn't immune to scissors congratulations please return to the front entrance to claim your rainbow dash [ __ ] jar how do i get in here try shooting it [ __ ] four of them okay my bad get [ __ ] ethan it's not like the baby the fetus baby is gonna be a problem if it's even still there yeah we have a shotgun and a sniper rifle and python now see the funny baby is locked up in the basement of the dark house where it deserves to be can this please move faster for the love of god try jumping i'm sure that'll i'm sure that'll make the elevator go faster seriously how long does this go pay no attention to the loading screen masked by the elevator yes uh keep spinning it all right thank you please hold [Music] oh wait hold on this is one of those ball ball where the hell did you even find this ball i don't know [ __ ] that bird oh there's a guy hey dude yeah where'd you get that from stop oh my god that goat just came out of [ __ ] nowhere it was just standing there menacingly it was coming right at it was just standing there just coming right at me man see the blood last minute i wasn't even looking at you oh my god it's a dark souls boss i once caught a fish it was this big you know your frisbee's beeping i don't know if it's supposed to do that [ __ ] the fruits of your exploration if you look forward to seeing your nuts ethan what what did you just say show me your balls fat [ __ ] gonads your underwear shattering seam-splitting oysters all right come here um i know i stopped moving i'm trying okay you're under arrest for cloaca related crimes i love to screech like a creature yeah exactly like that all right for the store bring me to my daughter's next part i put the key in the baby slot and then i am access to baby world i see this is why you always pack your backup legs deploy the legs deploying tread mode activating tanks wait shin we're not cavemen we have pipe bombs wait what happens if i shoot it test bullet warning shot why the [ __ ] is going on when it walks it makes a [ __ ] oh my god that was my back oh hi are you going back again again all right you son of a [ __ ] lucky shot you can't [ __ ] idiot what is this doing close your eyes and just listen to the sound and this is a bad scene or a good scene depending on how really yeah depending on how very adjacent you are this is either terrible or great yeah i mean if you have a if you have like a primal prey kink going on then it's probably pretty good but oh god snarl growl woof baby i'll be your dwarf man a lugo oh it's like no please stupid idiot dog it like runs off it's like oh [ __ ] oh my god it's scared now it is terrified of the explosion spooky music where did it go let's spooky music is it dead or not oh it died it died it died nice it died i can't believe i killed it i killed the unkillable dog it's so rare don't yeah oh hell yeah oh no yeah now you can shoot pipe bombs at things i feel like something's gonna come after me now i think what is meant to come after you has already died why please finger off the trigger and the one you hitting is the cute one i know i know i keep messing up i'm sorry everyone all right we've used two grenades on a wall and unfortunately the wall has won both times unfortunately yeah next time however not for long a brings to rocket launcher what's the matter with you i'm very scared of continuing a grenade launcher literally what could you possibly be afraid of everything again i invoke the grenade launcher clause you are indeed quite literally holding the [ __ ] you what the [ __ ] is going on here the slime is rendering optimized for ps5 you know at least with the pipe um it's like it's delayed so you have a chance to get away but this way it's just instant funny haha instant hilarity [ __ ] idiot my life be like a youtube poop it looks breakable though oh okay so we gotta eat the wall off on oh that reminds me of hari that's totally what this is right swamp the group the group the group yeah we're moving on to uh count blob you look i've survived for five winters out here sucking the moisture off the moss packets what's gonna happen is you're gonna like go up there and then something's gonna be like ah hi ethan i have drugged you with my super smelly gas and now you will be subject to my fun house i'm going to inflate you making you big and round no don't make me an internet search category that was hidden it was just like how did i do that oh that yeah you did quick turn how i don't know that apparently there's like a button for it but you can quick turn maybe l1 anyways uh i'm just gonna load real fast i wonder why what's the matter you want your healing item back yes wait what did i move the wrong one i loaded the autosave there what's up goopy boy i'm coming for your goop level group level the group isn't mine legit i kind of feel bad for ethan maybe he has the right to be such an [ __ ] ethan dude chime out they trapped me in tetris you gotta get me out of here dude i can't [ __ ] take it anymore [Music] did you steal my piss i'll just be taking this i won't let you bleed yeah even you are kind of an idiot no no you can break that much better oh yes and the bridge just magically builds itself yeah yes that's how it works god umbrella corporation you've done it again smart bridge smart bridge introducing the new smart bridge from amazon you ever find yourself in the middle of a deep dank sewer being chased by some weird warthog try smart bridge just add water everything's connected ethan oh wait you meant like the corridors my bad especially my colon ethan it's a closed loop i haven't pooped in years and if you join me neither could i think about it ethan pooping back and forth forever you never have to visit the bathroom again ethan think of how much time you'll save i've marathoned all of one piece in one sitting no bathroom breaks even i haven't missed a single part of a movie ever i watched avengers end game all three and a half hours of it in the theater and i had three drinks i had three large pepsis three ethan that's so [ __ ] much pepsi and then even after i drank the pepsi i let the ice melt and i drank that too woman love me fish fear me ethan would unironically post that [ __ ] on facebook if you spare me no it posts like morning i don't say good morning because if it was a good morning i'd be [ __ ] fishing i will now do a perfect impression of a soda can opening healthy sugar oh amazing do it again sorry it's on cooldown oh oh hello welcome to my fishing hut there's warm soup on the hob and you can find some pepsi cola in the fridge everyone leave the bouquet in the shack in the mine hands is dead so no more fishing for a while you're beaten by a giant fish yeah you know yeah hans died so you know you can the fishing for a while boys man i [ __ ] hate that i can't fish anymore because fans is [ __ ] dead tried suggesting we used his body for chum but not got the misses angry at me wait is this [ __ ] is this gonna be like a [ __ ] chase scene because of a bakery what if it like every moment that you're just spending here the fish is getting closer oh the fish come yep i gotta say i'm surprised you made it this far hey chris oh my god hey man remember when you shot my wife the only doing will be you doing my sisters thank you thank you oh that's a big fish oh he's evolving oh he's becoming second fish oh he is the fish when did you learn how to jump i didn't teach you that seeking something in particular fishing rod i guess the lock pick that sounds that's a pipe bomb yeah well i mean pipe bomb lock picks same thing really they both are very good at opening doors it just depends on how quiet you want to be and if you want to be able to close the door after oh my god look at this i can close my doors over here well they don't have closable doors in america all i know is that if you can close the door that's a look next don't talk to me about a luxury boy back in my day i used to live in hole in the road didn't even have a door i'm gonna go to bed now rubber good night unfortunately i must go as well because i have to make good on plans goodbye goodbye goodbye my public all right so it's just us two now oh dear yeah yeah i'm sorry no it's not oh dear that that the last people there are the more i want to cry smackdown oh god well i'm dead oh okay guys this is what dying feels like gonna catch me riding dirty

Channel: Shenpai

Views: 378,105

Rating: 4.9773378 out of 5

Keywords: Funny, Resident Evil Village, Resident Evil 8, RE8, REV, REVillage, Horror, Gameplay

Id: yNKpIAnIlIE

Length: 31min 48sec (1908 seconds)

Published: Sat Jul 03 2021