- Is your online dating profile the worst? - Let's talk about that. (upbeat music) Good mythical morning. - I think I can speak for both of us when I say we are eternally grateful that we're happily married
and we managed to avoid online dating altogether.
- Yes, yes. - Right, 'cause before
you even have to deal with the pressure of meeting someone you only know from the internet in person, you have to figure out how
to make a profile that says, "Hey, I'm cool, but not too cool." - But not too not cool. - Not too not cool. Just the right amount of cool. - Here's what's happened. The Mythical crew has scoured countless articles,
surveys, and Reddit threads, plus their own personal
experiences with online dating- - Mm-hmm. - To create a list of the
most commonly recurring online dating profile red flags. And now, we're gonna receive
an education, and hopefully, you'll receive the warning because today we're gonna be combining all of these bad ideas to make the worst dating profile ever. May we all learn from these mistakes. It's time for "Today We
Learn About Online Dating Since We Got Married Before
The Computer Was Invented. Hey, Who Wrote This? We're Not That Old." - Hey! - Hey. - Hey.
- Hey. - Hey. - Stevie? - [Stevie] It wasn't me.
- I've never even seen dating apps. - [Stevie] I didn't write it. - Okay, good. - [Stevie] Here is how this is gonna go. We surveyed the Mythical Beasts about a series of different ways online daters can really
turn potential partners off. Each round, you'll compete to guess what a majority of Mythical Beasts said was the worst possible way to fill in a specific part of an
online dating profile. - Oh. - [Stevie] After the
correct answer is revealed, Chase, the brainy but
taken research assistant, will place it on the Good
Mythical Mingle profile. - [Link] Alright. - Hey, Chase, nice shirt. - Hey, thanks. It's, yeah. I've got ongoing research about buttons. I still haven't figured that one out. - Have you ever online dated? - Yeah, yeah. - What was your app of choice? - There weren't that many
choices when I was online dating, so I think it was really just like Tinder. Or like, do you wanna get married with that one guy who's like, "Our app helps you get
married," on the TV commercials? That was like, that was it. - Oh, yeah. What's that? Match.com. - [Stevie] Eharmony, Match.
- Yeah, it was Match. It was like Tinder and Match.
- [Link] Okay. - [Rhett] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Those were the only things you can do.
- Alright, alright. - [Stevie] Okay, so keep in mind that we're thinking about this with the perspective of looking for love and not with the intention
of looking for lust. In the end, we will have created the worst online dating profile possible. And if you get less than three correct, you'll have to suffer through
the worst date of your life. - Ooh.
- Here's a hint. I did some research. I think it might be food related. - Oh, it's food related. - Not good. - Food related.
- Not good. Alright, let's get to it. - [Stevie] For our first piece
of the bad romance puzzle, we're looking at the ever
crucial profile photo. - Oh.
- Right. - [Stevie] We asked the Mythical Beasts- - That's a bad one. - [Stevie] What is the
absolute worst kind of photo used on online dating profiles? And we provided these options. A, a gym selfie. (Link scoffs) - Yeah.
- [Stevie] B, a professional headshot. - [Rhett] Oh. - [Stevie] C-
- (sighs) Trying too hard. - [Stevie] An overly filtered photo. - [Link] Uh-huh.
- [Rhett] Oh! - [Stevie] Or D- - With your mom. - [Stevie] A photo with
too many people in it so you can't tell who
the person actually is. - Yeah. - Huh. - Wow. Yeah, I can see how all these would be a little bit of a faux pas. But at least with a
bunch of people in there, there's kind of a- - You have friends. - They've met other people. - Yep, they can interact
with people in the real world if it ever comes to that. - And I'll see which one they are. - The business thing is like, what is this, LinkedIn? (scoffs) Alright, so we're writing these down. Is that how we're doing this? - [Stevie] Write it down. - I love that the filtered face woman is pointing at her filtered face. (Chase laughs) - I'm thinking about
the Mythical Beasts too, because while you guys are
representative of the population, you're also not completely
representative of the population. Right? So I'm thinking about-
- It's a subset. - [Rhett] Our fans. - Are you saying we
attract strange people? - No, actually, I think
we, like, you know, when those people that- - Strange attracts strange. - Those people that, anytime we gather the Mythical Beasts, whether it's tour or MythiCon, whatever, like everyone talks about how there's just so nice and thoughtful. Like, we have like a very
thoughtful group of people watching this show. - I'm gonna put my answer. - They're extra thoughtful. - So I'm not doing what you're doing. - You're gonna put the one that
would turn you off the most. - Yeah, if I were in this world. - Yeah. - Like, let's say- - I'm doing that, but I also think it's the answer that the
Mythical Beasts would choose. - Alright, okay. - Alright.
- [Stevie] Go ahead. - I think it's-
- C. - We agree 'cause I just, you know, you don't wanna start off with like an obviously fake
beginning to a relationship. - Right, because the
thing about the gym photo, while it is obviously a
turnoff because it's like this person cares too much
about their body, you're like- - Well, maybe not. - Well, at least they work out, you know. It's like, at least they're active. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Like that could be a positive there. - And if you also like the
gym, then that's a good thing. - Right, but if you're filtered, it's like I'm not gonna
get the real person. - Right. - [Stevie] Nearly 10,000
Mythical Beasts voted and 55.3% said a photo with too many people in it is the worst photo you can
put in a dating profile. - Is that true? I mean, Stevie, have you- - [Stevie] I mean, we're
not after like truth here so much as opinion. - Have you used dating apps? 'Cause I know you've been- - [Stevie] When I- - You've been off the market for what? Over a decade.
- [Stevie] Yeah. I don't think apps existed. I think OkCupid was the
only thing that was around. I don't think- - Dang, we all see- - [Chase] Okay.
- [Stevie] Yeah. - [Link] We're all- - [Rhett] Too many people? I mean- - [Chase] You don't
know which one's which. - I know, but then you go,
you click on the profile. If any one of those people is
attracted to you, you know, you click on the profile and even if you were wrong-
- I'll take any of you. - Even if you were wrong, oh, the second most attractive person is the one that this is about. Okay, well, let's figure
out their them out. (crew laughs) - [Stevie] Okay, you gotta put yourselves in the mind of the Mythical Beasts here. - Yeah, that's for sure. - That's what he said. - [Stevie] How you choose to
type in your own online profile is a huge decision, believe it or not. Which one of these typing
styles is the worst one you can possibly use when
trying to find a lover? - I don't even know what you mean, like- - [Stevie] You're about to know. You're about to know.
- All caps? - [Stevie] A- - [Chase] (laughs) Yeah, like that. - [Stevie] Too many emojis. You understand what I'm saying now? - Okay.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a style. - [Stevie] B, bad
spelling and bad grammar. Or C, all caps. - Oh, there's three options here. Well, too many emojis- - That's playful, isn't it? - It can be a, I guess it can be a
little bit of a turnoff. You know, does this
person actually use words? Like what, or I'm just
gonna get a series of faces when I meet them? - What does it say about someone that they use too many emojis? I mean, if you can't spell
and you got bad grammar, it just means that like you're just, you don't care enough about it. - I mean, spelling- - What does emojis mean? Like, what does that say about you if you're using too many emojis? That you're like, oh, this person's extra. Like, I gotta, I can only
take them in small doses. That's what I would think. - And bad spelling and bad
grammar could also mean that English is not your
first language, you know. There's lots of things that it could mean. - All caps. Like, okay, I don't wanna
constantly be yelled at. - I'm having to- - [Link] But it is more legible. - I'm having to revert to
your method here, Link, and go with what would be
the biggest turnoff for me. - Yeah, okay. I chose all caps. - I chose all caps. - Oh, we're, see, look at us. - [Stevie] All caps would
be your biggest turnoff is what you're both saying. - Yeah, because too many
emojis, it would be like, okay, this person's just
like playful and with it. Bad spelling and bad grammar- - With it? - For me, I would be like, I'm just hoping they're
from a different country. That's my hope. Maybe they're just from
a different country. All caps, there's never
an excuse for all caps. There's never an excuse for all caps unless you are really
trying to make a point. But in like a description about yourself? - [Stevie] Okay. - What if they really wanna date you? - I disrespect that choice. - [Stevie] Okay, okay. - Caps lock could be broken. - [Stevie] A whopping 66%
of the Mythical Beasts said that bad spelling and bad grammar is the worst typing style you
can put in a dating profile. - [Rhett] But what about-
- [Link] Really? - What about people who
don't speak English? - Oh, no. - [Stevie] Well, I don't
think that was, that context- - I know. - [Stevie] Didn't fully enter into the discussion.
- They were just like, yeah, okay. Okay, I get it. - I don't know. I just tend to, like, I don't know, man. It's like in this day and age with spell check and all that stuff- - It's hard to misspell things
and justify it these days. - Is it? - Is that what you're staying? - No, I was saying you get, cut 'em a little slack, you know? - Yeah, I thought you were
saying with spell check, if you can still manage to
misspell, then something, you're really trying hard, you know? Or not trying at all.
- Yeah, that's true. - Okay, we suck at this,
but it doesn't matter. - [Stevie] I mean, I wasn't gonna say it. You said it. It's tough.
- Well, it doesn't matter. - Yeah, we suck. - We're supposed to be
bad at this, Stevie. - [Stevie] Sure.
- We suck at this together. We're in total sync in sucking. - Yeah, we just say C every
time and it's always wrong. (crew laughs) - [Stevie] It's tough to
communicate who you are as a full person in a short caption. But as long as you don't do any of these, you should be fine. Which one of these self-description lines would be the worst to put
on your dating profile? - Okay, before you give us
the choices, can I tell you what I'll say is the worst?
- [Stevie] Yeah, please. - Anytime you start
listing out the things, like husband, father- - Well-
- Engineer. - [Stevie] That's like a Twitter bio. - I don't really wanna date a husband. - I'm talking about like Twitter profile- - [Stevie] Yeah.
- Where you just like say the things that you are. - [Stevie] That's not
what this game is about. This game is not about that.
(Chance laughs) - Does it-
- I'm in the market for some husband. (chuckles) - Does it translate to- - Keyword, husband. - When you say a word and then a period. I'm just saying. - [Stevie] I mean, I will say if you're looking to date someone and you go to their
little short sentence area and it says husband, father, yeah, that probably is the worst
thing you could have there. - Some people are into that. - [Stevie] Yeah. - God, country, Doritos. - Yeah, right.
(crew laughs) Any of that. - [Stevie] Okay. Your real options. A, I'm not sure what to put here. Just ask.
- Oh, ugh! (gags) (crew laughs) Okay, that's my answer
regardless of the rest of 'em because I hate that so much.
- Alright. - I hate indecisiveness. (crew laughs)
- Okay, give me your pen. You're locked in. - [Chase] They're
figuring it out, you know? - [Stevie] B, I'm fluent in sarcasm. C-
- Ugh. - [Stevie] My mom says I'm... D-
- Ugh. - [Stevie] Reliant on pop
culture quotes and/or references. Examples, I'm half Hufflepuff
and half Slytherin. - Hmm.
- Ugh. The worst.
- [Rhett] Those are all bad. - Yeah, they're all bad. That's the point. It's a question of what's the worst. - But I'm sticking with- - You have to stick with it. - I'm not sure what to put here. And given the choices, I
would go right back to it. - I just, I mean, this is
the toughest thing to put where it's just like open-ended, and you're supposed to describe yourself. I mean, to know that they have a mom that cares enough to
describe them is good data. The pop culture thing is helpful 'cause it's like shared passion. Oh, we both like Star Wars. I'm defined by that. - But does putting that-
- If you are too, well- - Just putting that in your bio- - And you don't have a husband- - Does it make you the kind of person who, like, does movie quotes in real life? And I'm sorry, I'm stepping
on some toes, I'm sure. (crew laughs) - I don't do that 'cause
I can't remember anything. - Yeah. - I'm going with C because
it's just so cringey. - Because that's what you've
been doing every time. - And that's what I've been doing. I'm consistent. - I'm breaking rank. - Don't be bringing your mom
into your dating profile. It's like, ugh. - It's a big turnoff. - [Stevie] 43.2% of the Mythical Beasts said that, "I'm not sure what to put here. Just ask," is the worst
bio line you can use. - It is, y'all! It is the worst!
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I can't argue with that. I can't argue with it. - Maybe I should-
- [Stevie] Okay. - Grab life by the horns! - [Stevie] Moving on. - You gotta actually, you
gotta figure something out. Come on. - [Stevie] Oh, we're not moving on. (Chase laughs)
- And you can ask your mom and then just put down what she says, but don't say that your mom, ugh. - [Stevie] Okay, moving on. We've all gotta make a living but some given professions
give people the ick. Some given professions? Okay. - Okay.
- [Stevie] Which one of these apparently
cringe-inducing professions turns online daters off? A, influencer/content creator. (Link laughs) Or B, entrepreneur.
- Hits home. - Yeah. - [Stevie] Only two options here because- - So we've got a 50/50. - [Stevie] These are
clearly both the worst. (crew laughs) - Yeah, see, that's what
I was telling you, man. - See, I think- - I was telling you by this. - I'm offended that influencer
and content creator are presented as interchangeable. - You think they're the same thing. - They're not- - You think they're different. - They're not the same thing.
- They are but people don't think
of them as different. They just don't. - Well, are you ready
to put down your answer? Because- - We had an inter, not not that we're plugging our podcast, but we do have a podcast
called Ear Biscuits, and we had an interesting
discussion recently about how we both had
to fill out something where you had to put your profession. And influencer and content creator- - Yeah.
- Were both available, but so was founder. And so I selected founder. - So you kinda went with B on this. - No, entrepreneur, it means like I'm a hustler kind of thing,
I feel like, you know? - I went with content
creator because I do, I'm a, I do create.
- Yeah, but I'm gonna, and I went in and changed mine and I'm going back and changing it again. I gotta come up with something else because yeah, it's such a turnoff. But this is the Mythical Beasts who are being asked this question and they know that we are
at least content creators. - So you went with B then? So did I.
- So I went with B. - I put, entrepreneur is like, I don't, I start stuff, but that's it,
and I don't really have a job. I think that's what that's code for. Influencer is freakin' I don't
have a job either, I guess. - [Stevie] 60.8% of the Mythical Beasts said that the profession
that turns them off the most is an influencer/content creator. (crew laughs)
- Dang it. Y'all, really? - I'm choosing to have faith in the idea that you don't see us
as one of these things. You see us as founders. (crew laughs) - Founders. We're not supposed to be
good at this, you know? - [Stevie] Well, but you know
what you're really good at? - Oh, we're good at talking about things- - [Stevie] Yeah. - That we want you to be interested in. - [Stevie] Mm-hmm, you said it. - Do you know what? The second quarterly collectible from Mythical Society is of the year? It is- - It's an album. - Yes, we finally did
what you asked us to do all those years. We updated the "My Hair" song 'cause my hair goes down
and Link's hair goes up now. And so we switched the parts, did a completely new version of the song. I mean, it's still the same song, but it's a complete new
recording, all new instrumental, everything.
- Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. - And the original
version is on the vinyl. The new version of is on the vinyl. And on the B-side is a song that we've never released before called "Relevant" that we only performed like one time in public at some point. So make sure you get that. You need to be a 3rd Degree Monthly member of The Mythical Society
by April 30th, okay? By April 30th-
- Get it. - To get that, mythicalsociety.com! - Yeah, also download the
Free Mythical Society app because it's free and it gives you reminders
of this type of stuff. - Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. - What's next? - [Stevie] On the dating app Hinge, there's a fun little audio message feature where potential suitors can listen to the sweet sound of your voice. It's a great idea with plenty
of room to go terribly wrong. - Hmm.
(crew laughs) - Oh, for real. Oh, man. - What does this person sound like? - This is tough. I mean, I'm so glad I
don't have to do this. This is difficult. - Are there videos on dating profiles? - [Stevie] Yeah, apparently so.
- So like intro videos? Hi, welcome to my profile. - Whoo, that's tough. - I'm a founder. (crew laughs) - That is tough. Like, this is like the modern version of leaving like a greeting
on your voicemail but- - Yeah. - So that someone will want
to live with you forever. - I think I would just say, "This is a demonstration
of the way my voice sounds. Ah. Ah. Ah."
(crew laughs) - I think mine would just
be like desperate begging. Just please give me a shot. Come on. What's one date gonna hurt?
- Yeah. - You know? And if it doesn't work out, hey, we can just call it
quits, you know, at any point. What are our choices? - [Stevie] Which kind of audio message is the biggest killer? Say it for the laughs,
Stevie, say it for the laugh. A, doing a celebrity impression such as this. - [Chase] Do I make you horny, baby? Do I make you randy?
- Oh, god! Oh! - [Chase] Austin Powers. (crew laughs) - Especially when you call it out, Chase. - [Link] Whoa, whoa. Oh, we didn't-
- Well, that was- - That was Mike Myers himself. - That was Mike Myers, yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - How did we get Mike Meyers for that? - Cameo. - Yeah. - There's a price for everything. - Chase knows him very well. - [Stevie] Or B, singing like this. ♪ I'm singing ♪ ♪ And this is how it sounds when I sing ♪ ♪ And if you don't like it ♪ ♪ Then it's not gonna work out ♪ - How did we get Emily? Wow.
(crew laughs) - Cameo. - Yeah. I was gonna say Cher. (crew laughs) - So the singing is
kinda like you're just, this is how I talk. - Uh-huh. This is how I sing. - Alright, here we go. Gotta do this. This is obvious to me. Yeah, it's gotta be A. It's got, I mean, celebrity impression. - Look at those specs. (chuckles) - [Stevie] Okay, this was (Chase laughs) a really close one. - Uh, really?
- [Stevie] 50.3%- - No. - If you can sing though. - [Stevie] Of the Mythical Beasts said that singing is
the worst audio message you can put on your profile. - So a lot of people do this? Is this a common thing? What in the world? - [Stevie] I'm getting uh-huh, uh-huh. - Uh-huh, I hear a lot of singing. Yes, I do, yeah. - [Stevie] Uh-huh. - You'd be surprised
how much singing I hear. - Even if it's good, it's
probably a little cringey. - [Stevie] Okay, finally,
some say that too many singles set their expectations too high, but what about too annoying? Which of these ideal partner descriptions deserves the fastest swipe left? - Okay, ideal partner.
- [Stevie] A, astrological mentions. - Mm-hmm. - [Stevie] In search of a Gemini queen with a Scorpio rising, smiley face. - [Rhett and Link] Hmm. - [Stevie] Or B, hardcore pet parent. For example, if you can't
get along with my animal, then it's not gonna work. - See, I feel like both of these are good, like just tests of compatibility. - Because if you're really into astrology- - You want someone who's
really into astrology. - You don't want somebody who's like, "I don't believe in that," because then you're gonna just be annoyed by each other.
- Fighting all the time. - And you're gonna be arguing. And if you really, if you
have a pet, I mean, there's, I mean, allergies. - So really, it's what
thing is more of a turnoff to more people, really, astrology or pets? - [Link] Yeah, this is
tough, this is tough. - Okay. - Astrological signs. - That's what I went with. - Yep, see, you and I agree. We've dated the same women. - Yeah. - [Stevie] Mythical Beasts
had a very strong opinion on this one. 82.7% agreed with you-
- Yes. - [Stevie] That astrological
partner descriptions are the worst! - Unless you're into it, and then you can be the worst together. That's up to you. - [Stevie] Well, the bad
news is that you both lost. But the good news is, is you get to go on that
worst date together. Let's do it right now, shall we? - Oh, gosh. Okay, I'm told it's
food related, and it is. And of course it's-
- Oh, this looks like dates.
- It's dates. - Oh, look, it's the worst date ever. Grab one.
- Oh. Yeah, it's in something. I'm not grabbing it. - [Link] I'm afraid. - It's a date that's in tuna juice. (crew laughs) Is that right? - [Stevie] Yeah. Hey, you won that part.
- Oh. (Rhett laughs) - My breath smells like fish. Let's date. - If you put- - How were we supposed to know this stuff? I'm glad we lost, you know. - If we had won, it
would've been suspicious. - Thanks for subscribing
and dating that bell. - Oh. - You know what I'm saying? - You know what time it is.
(Link chuckles) - I'm Makayla. - And I'm Chad. - And we're in Gig Harbor,
and we just got engaged. - And it's time to spin
the Wheel of Mythicality. - Nothing like love on the harbor. - Congrats. - Click the top link to watch us see how much farther we can take
catch the fish for granddad in Good Mythical More. - And to find out where the Wheel of
Mythicality is gonna land. Join 3rd Degree Monthly by April 30th to get our "My Hair" song remake on vinyl. Mythicalsociety.com.
Here I go again, watching another 30 minutes of catch the fish with grandad.... and enjoying every second.
I’m with Rhett and Link - overly filtered picture is 10 times worse than a picture with too many people in it.
And I would call them, “CEOs of their own online media production company, and hosts of a successful YouTube morning show.” But that is kind of a mouthful.
Entrepreneur, when a dude just has pictures of himself wearing designer clothes, posing in front of various cars and holding stacks of cash. What does he do? He's got a lot of stuff in the works. Prestige Worldwide.
I put it in the YouTube comments but I NEEEEED to know where they got the “gym selfie” pic because the guy has a circuitry tattoo nearly identical to mine!!
Are they still on spring break?
not me feeling called out for being a slytherpuff, hahaha - but i don't actually put that on a profile. i know i'm thoroughly in the dating game though, bc i guessed correctly for every single round, oof
Where was yesterday's video?