r/AmiTheA**Hole For Throwing Out My Girlfriend For Deleting Photos Of My Dead Wife?

good day there guys the voice that lulls you to sleep here back at it again with another episode of r slash and by the a-hole now if you love me like i love you i want you to sit back relax chuck a like on the video chuck a prawn on the barbie and get ready for some bloody good content posted by user throw away a hole maybe titled am i the a-hole for kicking my girlfriend out after she deleted dead wife's pictures from my phone so my 25 male wife died 19 months ago it was real hard on me the first few months but i finally started putting myself back out there i met my girlfriend 23 female 7 months ago it was going pretty well and she moved into my apartment around four-ish months ago in hindsight we probably rushed this my girlfriend is very overprotective and clingy and scared of me cheating as she's been heard in the past i let her have my phone password so she could ease her mind she saw a photo of me and my wife and asked who she was and i explained she seemed to take it well but was a little bit awkward about it fast forward three days and i go to take a shower and leave my phone on charge in the bedroom i come out to see my phone unlocked weird but i let it slide later in the day i go through my photos to upload a new profile picture to facebook all the photos of my wife and me and her together are gone without a trace i checked my snapchat my eyes only because i had a few in there along with intimate photos of us together i knew it was my girlfriend i confronted her about it and she started yelling she said i need to get over it and get rid of all the reminders of my wife because she was here now she also called me really creepy for having nude pictures of a dead girl granted i probably should have deleted those a long time ago but i didn't want to because they were special to me might be an a-hole on my part there i was livid i told her to get out she stared at me in disbelief as i told her again she packed some stuff and left i went to my room and cried i woke up to many missed calls and angry texts from her and her friends for calling me the a-hole this might not have been a big deal but she permanently got rid of 95 of the pictures of my wife i still have some printed like the wedding in some vacations but i'm still missing a big chunk of them i feel like she deleted a part of me as well i've had to block multiple numbers including my sisters what the hell i do miss her though and want to talk but i'm confused reddit am i in the wrong no i feel like a lot of people would have the same reaction if they were that close to their partner like that and they were suddenly taken from you so young i would have the exact same reaction as you if my photos were just deleted like that in my phone i tie so many memories and things and parts of myself to old photos that i go back and i remember fondly and just things pop up in your mind hey i remember this that was funny on that day to me it's literally erasing parts of who i am if something like that were to happen to me and that's something people shouldn't have to experience you know screw her she is in the wrong she deserves the fallout she deserves to be yelled out i don't care opie you're not the a-hole you do you chief not the a-hole don't let her back in your life she needs therapy for her issues thank you i feel maybe i rushed into things without giving myself time to heal i may not be the a-hole but i am pretty stupid you're none of those things dude i'm sorry for your loss and wish you all the best you should take her to court for this if it caused you emotional trauma you are definitely not the a-hole i don't want to take anything that far i'm taking advice and blocking her and everything i made sure she left her key i'm taking my phone to see if there was any way to get them back asap we'll keep you updated not the a-hole check the deleted files folder on your phone a lot of phones have the equivalent of a recycle bin so hopefully they're sitting there fingers crossed she's not tech savvy enough to realize that ps change any passwords she may have access to rop may have also backed up without knowing he may want to check on the icloud.com or photos.google depending on his phone to see if anything's there not the a-hole she's jealous of your late wife as in the one person you can literally never ever cheat on her with i don't know i could do dobby but he doesn't exist unfortunately she completely ruined memories that you cannot get back due to her own insecurities and need to control you and didn't even apologize yeah that's some next level insecurity first red flag should have been moving in together after four months not the a-hole not the a-hole the lion the witch and the sheer audacity of this [ __ ] she destroyed precious memories of your past precious memories of your wife sentiment is what keeps humans sane it's what keeps humans kind she ruined that she went behind your back violated the trust you put in her destroyed your sentiments spat on your will and your past and tried to make you the bad guy she didn't even try to help you move on in a decent and loving way these actions are the actions of a controlling and gaslighting woman she would not be a good partner kick her to the curb let her back in your life and your life is over she will hold these things over you worm into your head and take everything from you don't take this kind of abuse mate you don't need to settle for trash like this mega jealous idiot take your time find someone good for you don't get into a relationship to fill the hole that's what she said posted by user ravenna53 titled am i the a-hole for taking my daughter's violin away my daughter 15 and i 38 moved into my boyfriend's 56 and 18 year age gap whoa home a month ago we've been dating since march and wanted to take the next step in our relationship when we moved in all i asked of my daughter was that she respect that this was my boyfriend's home and to be respectful towards him as with practically all apartments in new york city space is limited therefore every time my daughter practices her violin everybody else can hear this has proved to be an annoyance to my boyfriend and one of his rules is that she practice when he's not home flash forward to last week i wake up to her playing away my boyfriend is already at his desk working on a project for work and he says he's so annoyed and can't focus right now my boyfriend goes in her room and asks if she forgot the house rules she retorts that she has a virtual audition in a couple of hours and needed to practice i had told her not to wait until the last minute to practice but she did so anyway it was seven and my boyfriend's work presentation was at nine my daughter's audition was at ten so i tell her to wait until he leaves the house and she'll still have time to warm up we leave her room and soon after i hear her plucking the strings and obviously moving her bow my boyfriend goes in again and she tells him to go to the lobby and work there i didn't like my daughter's tone she also clearly wasn't going to stop making noise so i ended up taking her violin and bow away until my boyfriend leaves for work my daughter is so mad that she's shaking when i give her her stuff back she says that she needed to do more than warm up and threw a tantrum before her audition now it's a week later and she found out she didn't make it into the orchestra she's locked herself in her room and calls her stepfather hitler and doesn't talk to me at all am i the a-hole i was reacting to her disobeying a clear directive from me she was also disrespecting the man i love by kicking him out of his own home the lobby of our apartment is used a lot and poses a health risk to my boyfriend and he needs to give 100 at his job also my daughter had plenty of time to practice before the day of i think you and the boyfriend both suck in this situation here i don't think he's a stepfather at all after those few months that you've been together and i think that what you're putting on this girl is ridiculous i don't know why he agreed to have you both in the apartment if he wasn't okay with the compromise of the violin because it's very much important for the daughter and i guess you two have lots to work out with that daughter because she's the victim in this situation you guys suck you're the a-hole you moved in with your boyfriend after three months of dating and basically told your daughter her goals don't mean anything and boyfriend is king it might be his home but thanks to you now it's hers as well big fat parenting fail mom calls him her stepfather this poor little girl is going through a lot right now can't even have the stability of playing her own violin i came here to say this in big drastic crazy changes music was the only thing i ever had growing up taking away the daughter's instrument wasn't just saying her goals and wants don't matter it took away her escape from reality which she clearly needs since she's living with her mum who's insisting on calling her a whole boyfriend her kid's stepfather after three months of dating you're the a-hole op you were destroying your relationship with your daughter for a guy you've only been with for a few months you're the a-hole you upended your daughter's life to move into an apartment that isn't big enough just because you've been going out with this guy for three months that's what makes you the a-hole also he's not her stepfather he's your short-term boyfriend who you inexplicably moved in with after three months you're the a-hole girl the dick can not be that good stop being hypnotized by it and remember you have a daughter you're supposed to care for and this account has just been suspended so unfortunately anyone that wants to come find this post doesn't exist anymore sorry posted by user formal letters 3 titled am i the a-hole for saying we'd only help with my ex's kid's party if we could tell people that we were engaged this guy jack and i were together for about a year and with a couple of weeks of ending it i found out i was pregnant i texted jack to tell him and a couple hours later this woman liz showed up at my place saying she and jack had been together for six months and she was also pregnant and when the text arrived she got my address out of jack's phone so she could talk to me before him i told her everything and liz dumped jack i was about six weeks along at this stage and she was 12 weeks liz and i weren't exactly busy mates to begin with but jack took a huge step back when he realized how angry at him we both were so liz and i ended up doing pregnancy stuff together when my roommate said that she didn't want to live with a baby liz suggested we move in together jack objected but we told him to get lost and moved in together over the years we got closer i've always known that i was bi but when our kids were a year old liz realized that she was gay and when the kids were about five liz asked me out we knew it was a little bit weird but nothing about our relationship before this was conventional so we figured why get hung up on normal now we've been together four years now and liz proposed a few months ago i said yes jack has been an involved parent this whole time paying us both child support and having custody on alternate weekends he's met someone new married a few years ago and they have a son tommy tommy looks up to the nine-year-olds my son liz's daughter and loves them a lot and they adore their little brother tomorrow tommy is having a socially distanced birthday party for his fifth birthday the current guest list is both sets of grandparents and aunt uncle cousin trio the neighbor's sons then me liz and our kids they've kept it pretty small for obvious reasons and there's only going to be the five kids there total and tommy is good friends with the neighbor's kids but not so much with his cousin the party is on a date that jack doesn't have custody so he asked us to bring the kids as a favor he also asked us to stay and help with the party because i'm a decent baker and cook and he's asked me to make the cake which i agreed to and it looks pretty good if i say so myself but now the day before the party jack has told me and liz that his wife's family are homophobic so for the duration of the party he's going to need us to pretend that we're straight single moms because jack is already on thin ice with them for getting three women pregnant we said we'd drop the kids and the cake but not stick around because jack's parents hate us both anyway and we won't hide our relationship jack has said that we're being unreasonable he needs us to do this as a favor and we already agreed to help so we can't bail on him the day before the party are we the a-hole edit i wasn't going to post about this here but since posting this we've had a bunch of comments about how this sounds like rom-com which is fine and we're okay with joking about it but in addition to this we've had four actual messages and comments saying that someone seriously wants to adapt this into a novel and screenplay that's weird and it makes us uncomfortable these are our lives please stop well that was weird alright i don't think that you guys are the a-holes for wanting to ditch the homophobic parents at the party if they want to get all mad and judgmental and crap they can do that on their own dime you don't have to be there as a favor to him just letting him have the two kids in the first place is already a favor enough you shouldn't have to subject yourself to lying about your relationship just to please his parents who you don't actually care about so why do it you're not the a-hole him and his parents are jack cheats gets three women pregnant has judgmental parents and in-laws because of his actions and says hey can you help me out with the party you know cook bake decorate and you're like sure cool but you can't act like a couple around my judgmental parents and in-laws because they're ticked cause i'm a dog who cheats and knocks women up that's cool right um no here's the food and the kids though have fun and he's like how dare you not change who you are to appease my family y'all not the a-hole jack the a-hole congrats on your engagements by the way not the a-hole wow so let me get this straight jack cheated on both of you and you were both pregnant when you found out i'm so sorry both of you ended up in that situation and i'm so happy for you that you have both found happiness with each other and created a loving family you should in no way have to hide yourselves to make his life easier and he shouldn't even have asked you that i'm amazed you're still making the cake you're a better person than i am honestly liz and i talked when we first found out about jack and agreed that if our kids are going to be half siblings then we should at least get on with each other we're actually almost glad it happened when it did because there's no way that liz and i would have gotten to where we are now if i'd been with jack for years or even married him or she was knowingly helping him cheat this way jack has found someone who knows how to reign him in liz and i found each other and all three siblings are close with good relationships everyone's happy not the a-hole so because of his terrible decision-making embarrassing track record with pregnancy prevention congratulations in your happy little family nothing is normal and you found happiness in a crazy world you guys are supposed to pose his straight after bringing his kids over to him as a favor i wouldn't have my life be even more compromised by his decisions he can ask of you that you hide it you don't have to do it if his fiancee can't handle the guy shotgunning his sperm everywhere why is she with the guy the homophobia is her problem entirely the wife is actually pretty great she's not funny with us at all she gets that it's jack who's the screw-up here but apparently her parents sibling and the sibling's partner are all varying levels of homophobic she says she's tried to get them to stop but i met some of them at jack and her wedding a few years ago and they seemed pretty homophobic liz said the father of the bride was funny about her wearing a suit and we weren't even dating yet so it was literally just a woman in a suit that he objected to i'd drop the cake off and leave don't grace the bigots with your presence and i'd lump jack in with bigots if he appeases them and does not stand for equal treatment and respect not the a-hole and congrats ladies posted by user ta feisty bison 5036 titled am i the a-hole for prohibiting heating pads at work i 34 male am leading a team of six software developers one of them keith 28 male who is my top performer the other is anne 26 female keith is on the spectrum and sometimes a bit particular yesterday keith complained to me that anne is contaminating the office microwave with body fluids upon investigation it turns out that anne is heating her heating pad in the microwave which she then puts on her stomach and after it cools down back in the microwave and keith frets about possible sweat getting on the pad and then getting into the microwave and daughter's food i think the risk is there but not that high but keith is also a bit particular especially around food and the disability woman from hr said i need to accommodate him to make him feel comfortable and perform well so i asked dan not to use the microwave for her heating pad anymore she told me she needs it for pain management but she doesn't seem to be in pain we are also living in a country with free health care and paid sick leave and stuff so if she were she could just get medical help without she asked me to document my decision and said she will then go home and take her sick leave and that she won't return today which seems like a pretty emotional reaction to a regular office rule my wife said that i am the a-hole for not hearing ann out but she ignores that keith couldn't eat at the office or feel comfortable there if i didn't enforce that rule and i'd actively discriminate against him am i the a-hole edits are gay seems like i am at least the a-hole for dismissing anne's pain i will apologize to her for that if she returns tomorrow that probably was uncalled for i don't really have a solution yet as a second microwave is no option and i'd have to talk to the safety folks to check if those electric heating pads were allowed but as both seem to be valid needs and concerns there has to be some middle ground so i'll work on that thanks for your feedback edit 2 i talked with hr about it they basically said that everyone sucks here and for ignoring some house rules about the kitchen and food safety and possibly endangering immuno-compromised folks keith for not being compromising and me for dismissing anne so where are [ __ ] and hr can either get us all in trouble well at least me and anne or no one also electric pad is fine as long as she doesn't plug it into the wall but uses a power bank you're the a-hole for she doesn't seem to be in pain you can't tell that somebody's in pain by looking at them and women are particularly well at hiding it free healthcare doesn't cure pain and not everyone wants to take the day off for feeling sore when they can manage it just stop being an ass and get a second microwave for keith both of their concerns are completely valid and a second microwave will make everyone happy a second microwave for one person seems too much i already moments in details about options but i reckon that he could make sure she puts the pad on a dish and that keith puts his food on a dish so neither of them directly touch the microwave before anyone else comments he said he can't have a microwave i will not keep responding to people saying you can get a cheap microwave because it's not an option in this case i have to say you're the a-hole here because why would you go out of your way to accommodate keith's uncomfort but not anne's actual pain you just dismissed her and basically said she was lying you could have compromised and gotten an electric heating pad so that there was nothing going into the microwave sorry but let's call this what it is it's more than bad management it's opie empathizing more with the needs and concerns of someone his own gender rp might not even realize it but there is a long history of women's pain and needs being dismissed by managers who are male because frankly they are unable to put themselves in a woman's shoes for 5 seconds any women would immediately understand that anne's pain is possibly connected to her period that's not something you can just go to the doctor to solve even with free health care it's something most women just live with and manage with heating pads advil etc yes i'm asking op to be able to understand and empathize with this female employee even about her possible period-related pain shocking right frankly opie be better edit wow i really appreciate all the positive feedback on this comment my faith in humanity has been restored because of y'all and then he called her emotional for literally going through with his suggested alternative taking the day off as a sick day like misogyny 101 the really dumb thing is microwaves kill germs so why is anyone freaking out about this right i don't understand why people are even suggesting buying other stuff when literally microwaves can sterilize fungi bacteria and viruses hell i bet that top employees hands are more germs than a pad that's microwaved daily anyways you're the a-hole op posted by user hot today 59-93 titled am i the a-hole for telling my fiance that her dream wedding location is off limits because my sister had chosen it first throw away so i proposed to my girlfriend the beginning of this year we had originally planned to get married this september but that has obviously been pushed back to next year my sister also got engaged last year and tara and her fiance were 100 set to have an april wedding before the pandemic shut everything down however tragedy struck and her fiance suddenly passed away this june covered death it has been an extremely tough time for all of us in the family my sister has been hospitalized on and off over the past month and we are all doing our best to support her anyways now i am fighting with my fiancee because i'm putting my foot down so to speak on her latest decision to change our wedding venue to where my sister originally planned hers my sister had planned to have her wedding at a famous country estate mansion near where we live that's really hard to reserve normally it was also where she went on one of her first dates with her fiance so it had special meaning for them my fiancee recently told me that she contacted the estate out of curiosity and found out they have openings early next year so now she wants to have our wedding there instead she visited the place and fell in love and says it's actually her dream venue i basically said absolutely not are you insane that would be incredibly traumatic for everyone in my family including me but especially my mum and sisters who already helped my sister and brother-in-law plan their wedding at that exact location my fiance won't budge and she's furious i'm not seeing things from her side she says our wedding could be like a beautiful tribute to my sister's loss but i don't think anyone would see it that way more than likely people will think we stole my sister's wedding ideas and are forcing her to attend out of cruelty am i the a-hole for telling my fiancee her dream venue is an absolute no-go no oh my god is she insane that's what's one of the worst ideas i've heard from this sub and i've heard a lot of really bad ideas how about we play a tribute to the person that your fiance would have married but died earlier in their life too you know because they don't want to marry you they just want to marry the idea of that person that's a good idea too let's do that one why is it whenever wedding plans come out people just go loopy i don't understand it definitely not the a-hole op i don't envy the position that you're in i wouldn't want to be stuck in that rock in the hard place both the rock and the hard place being your insane fiancee oh my god no thank you not the a-hole but i am really trying to understand how your fiancee could possibly see that as a beautiful tribute for your sister oh remember that beautiful wedding you were excited to share with the love of your life well now that your life's fallen apart you get to see someone else have it you're welcome can you imagine yep right on the money she will be rubbing salt into your sister's wounds leave that poor girl alone she will have a hard enough time going to your wedding already your wedding is going to be so awful for your poor sister anyway even if she is genuinely happy for you i hope this is a one-time mental glitch for your fiance and not typical behavior hmm what do i want now how can i convince myself and others that it is not only reasonable but altruistic not the a-hole not the a-hole your fiancee is lacking empathy here and that's something you need to consider for the long run of your relationship this cannot be stressed enough there is something really wrong with your fiancee because she cannot understand why using this venue is so hurtful to you your family and especially your sister oh you think it's a beautiful tribute you think she'll think that okay let's video call her right now and you can tell her your amazing idea you not me and don't you pretend that this is coming from both of us if her face lights up when you say it then we'll do it and if she cries yells or hangs up i will not be marrying you there or anywhere else well what are you waiting for nothing to be afraid of if you genuinely believe that she'll like the idea oh feeling a little hesitant to actually tell her might that be because you know this is cruel as hell not the a-hole posted by user am i the a-hole friend in need titled am i the a-hole for leaving my wife and kids after she locked the door on me my wife decided that it'll be funny to lock the door on me while i was getting the mail i waited for 10 minutes knocking the door and calling her and she still wouldn't answer i was already pretty ticked that morning because i stubbed my toe and slept pretty terribly she knew this so i just decided to bike to my friend's house after about 10 minutes she tries to call me but i just ignore her after about two hours hanging around with my friends playing some halo i come back home riding my bike the door is open by this point i came home to see her in tears now she's very ticked at me for leaving her with our kids for over an hour i just say to her that she locked me out and that i didn't think she needed help i was already pretty ticked that day and didn't think locking me out for 10 minutes was very funny so i decided to make it fun she's now complaining that we're supposed to have equal responsibilities in taking care of our children and that i was being sexist that i just left her our children are four and one so am i the a-hole not the a-hole a harmless joke would be locking it for you to have the initial shock of i remember this being open before not ignoring you for 10 minutes for real maybe let him knock two or three times and then let him in and giggle but it's also not smart to try to play a joke on someone who's already in a bad mood people that normally could have laughed can snap at something dumb because they were already in a bad mood yeah and she even left him out there for 10 minutes and it seems like she would have left him out for 10 more minutes because she called him 10 minutes later everyone sucks here 10 minutes is night's cool leaving with no word for two hours is not cool grow up both of you you're supposed to be adults and partners jesus i can't believe i had to scroll this far to finding everyone sexier this whole situation just screams childish for both parties also sorry but as an adult not sleeping well and stubbing your toes shouldn't be triggering enough to be in a really bad mood all day like we all sleep bad sometimes and i stub my toe and then i get over it i'm not going to be extra mad at the stuff my spouse does because of either of those things that are out of their control this is the part that made me start to question op you were already in a terrible mood because you'd stubbed your toe that morning you're gonna work on your emotional stability man he didn't say he was in a bad mood all day he could have gotten the mail that morning haven't you ever woken up in a bad mood wouldn't it suck if the spouse knew you were cranky and did something crappy anyways and i'm not going to be extra mad at the stuff my spouse does because if either of those things are out of their control i agree with this but see what she did was completely in her control i can see locking him out as a joke and then immediately unlocking the door but what she did was unnecessarily obnoxious and mean i mean he didn't get a call from her from 10 more minutes after he left he could have been locked outside for 20 minutes if he didn't leave who locks their spouse out of the house for 20 minutes as a jerk i don't know either he's not telling us something or she has some really pent-up resentments justifiable or not justifiable yes everyone sucks here so you're an a-hole too sorry reddit i'm not in the majority op if you care here is why one she screwed up not a funny joke not funny to do you were pained for 10 minutes and maybe longer she was pained for two hours two you knew she was in the house and where your kids were sounds like she didn't know where you went if you were coming back etc this may have triggered serious abandonment fears in her especially with that reaction she gave you 3. you got to play games for 2 hours while she was caring for your children i get you were punishing her which is a stupid thing to do but that aside for the sake of your children you should have waited around and had a mature conversation now i'll say this it's good that you took time away to cool off but and i'm speaking from my own therapeutic background here if i take space from my wife after a fight or joke gone wrong i really need to tell her how long i think i'll be gone because of her own fears and issues what may seem like a harmless prank revenge to folks here on reddit could have seriously hit something in her psyche that may have lasting damage between you two yes her prank was juvenile and stupid and she needs to grow up your prank was also juvenile and stupid and you may have really hurt her emotionally take some time to talk to her really and make sure she's okay and that you're okay alright guys that's where i'm gonna end today's video i really do hope you enjoyed it and maybe even learned something that you didn't know before if you 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Channel: Markee

Views: 30,548

Rating: 4.90172 out of 5

Keywords: aita, amitheasshole, r/aita, r/amitheasshole, aita reddit, markee, markee reddit, markee aita, markee amitheasshole

Id: P_SKzdonGbk

Length: 34min 51sec (2091 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 26 2020