Hello my wonderful friend! Today we are
going to be talking about the "once you stop caring she
starts chasing" concept and why it will mess up your life,
like permanently. What you are going to learn today comes from both my insight
as a woman as well as my extensive training and
research as a certified coach. If you want to avoid heartbreak,
messing up your relationships, and frankly just being
miserable, make sure you watch to the end of this
video. Not only am I going to be sharing five reasons the "once you stop caring
she starts chasing" concept is incredibly flawed but I also have
some very very special tips at the end that will help you feel better about
this and actually know what to do that will get results
instead. Before we dive in if this is your first time watching,
welcome! My name is Melannie. I'm a Christian dating coach for men.
I help you stop wasting your time and stop wasting your money
on dead end relationships by learning the skills you need
to actually get your ideal girlfriend. And I'm not just talking
a girlfriend, I'm talking about your dream girl. So if that sounds like
something you want make sure you subscribe, ring that
notification bell, and give me a big thumbs up. All right let's talk. The
internet is full right now of so many people saying "get her to
chase you. Stop caring and she'll chase you. And once you walk
away she'll chase you." And the truth is guys
this will mess up your life, okay? This will not lead you to happy relationships.
This is a terrible terrible tactic. In all honesty it will wreck your life
if you keep doing it. The only way to get a happy relationship
is to stop doing it and I have five reasons for you today
that explain why. Ready to dive in? Let's get started.
Reason number one is that the whole concept
of one person chasing the other is actually flawed.
It does not lead to a happy relationship. I'm going to illustrate for you with my
hands. Pretend that my fingers are people, okay? As long
as one person is chasing the other you never get
together, right? It never connects. A healthy relationship,
a happy relationship, has two people who come together. They're
close. A relationship where one is chasing the
other, there's no closeness, there's no
connection. So a real relationship, a happy relationship, the
relationship everybody wants deep down, cannot be achieved if one is chasing
the other. Instead you have to mutually move
towards each other. Does that make sense? With this being said you guys know if
you've been following my channel for a while that I do teach you about
the importance of pursuing. That is completely different than
chasing. And as a woman there are certain things women have to
do to in their own way pursue you as well, be invested in this relationship.
The very nature of chasing is that one person is running away
and the other person is trying to keep up with them, trying to get their
attention. And that's not a happy relationship,
right? Who in the world want to be in a relationship like that?
The truth is it's exhausting, it's not happy, and it's just not fun. The
second reason the "once you stop caring she starts chasing" concept
is flawed and will mess up your life is it actually doesn't lead to a lifelong
relationship. Again if you've been following me
for a while you know one thing that sets my channel apart from
pretty much everything else on the internet is that I teach you
how to have a lifelong relationship, that crazy
happy relationship. You know those cute old people who are like
crazy in love in their 90s? Yeah I'm talking
that kind of relationship. What most people are teaching on the internet
right now is a whole bunch of mind games, a whole
bunch of tricks. And yeah they're effective if you're looking
for one night fling, okay? I'm gonna be perfectly honest with
you. But if you're trying to get that lifelong happy relationship
it's not going to work. Pay close attention because this is actually going
to comfort you so much. Any woman, any good, real woman
who is sincere, really what she wants is she just wants
you to love her and she just wants to love you
and she just wants to know who you are and she just wants you to know the real
her and she wants just a crazy, happy, honest, open, relationship. And any
relationship that is playing these mind games and making you chase her and
her chase you and "now I can't talk to you and now you can't talk to me"
that's not sincere, that's not honest, that's not open, it's exhausting.
And so what it's going to do is those sincere awesome women
it's going to repel them. They're not going to be interested, they're going to
walk away. Now if this has not been your experience up to this point
then it's because you've been attracting toxic women which is a terrible
terrible hamster wheel. Seriously it's awful. Be sure to watch
this video and it will help you so much with this.
As long as you're attracting toxic women you're never going to attract the type
of woman you really want. If you want that long lasting happy
relationship the "once you stop caring she starts
chasing" concept is not going to cut it for you. Now real
fast I want to answer this question because I know you guys are going to ask
it. "Okay so I'm starting to see why this is
actually a terrible idea, right? I'm starting to see why this will not work.
Well, what's going to work instead?" The truth is guys that's exactly what
I'm here for. I've actually put together a free masterclass for you that teaches
you exactly what you need to do to get your
ideal girlfriend. Stop wasting time with these games and these silly tricks
and just know exactly what does work. There's a link in the description below,
I also put a link in the pinned comment. You'll learn the
biggest mistakes that will keep you single forever,
you'll learn why you are not getting your ideal girlfriend and what to do
instead to get her. As well as my five-step
framework I teach my paid clients to get their ideal girlfriends.
So you're going to want to make sure you check out that masterclass. Again it's
totally free, there's a link in the description and a link in the pinned
comments. Reason number three is that it actually attracts the wrong kinds of
women. This whole "once you walk away she starts
chasing" does actually attract some women. I will be completely honest with you it
does, but they are toxic women, they are drama
queens. I'm gonna put a graph up on the screen
for you. This is what most people think a normal relationship looks like.
It's got some pretty high highs, right? But it's also got
some pretty awful lows and it's not really progressing, it's
not really going anywhere. But this is what most people think
that's just how it is. Up, down, up, down, hot, cold, hot, cold.
The truth is that is actually not what a relationship
should look like. Here's another graph. This is what a relationship should look like.
It just goes up. It just progresses. You just get
closer and closer like I talked about, you just get more and more in love. Yes
you are going to have good days and you are going to have bad days.
That is life. And you're going to have things you need to work through. But
ultimately you are always moving in an upward direction. That is
why again this whole concept of making her chase
you is not going to lead to a lifelong
relationship. It's going to have those serious ups and downs and mess up
your relationship and ultimately your life. Real women, the type of woman
you actually want to grow old with, she doesn't have time for that first
graph. She doesn't have time for all that drama
and those ups and downs and guessing and trying to figure it out. She doesn't have
time for that so she will actually walk away from that.
A woman like that, if he starts "stop caring,
playing it aloof" she's going to turn around and she's going to walk away
because she's looking for sincerity, she's looking for honesty.
It's not going to work on her. But the other women,
they love drama. And so that up and down system is exactly what they're looking
for. So you are going to attract toxic women. And whenever you're in a
relationship with a toxic person it's a toxic relationship. It's hurtful,
it's painful, and it's miserable. One of the biggest
things to remember is if a relationship starts with mind games and tricks
that is how it will end. One way or another
that is how it will end. Either you will have to do that
your entire married life to keep her interested in you
or as soon as the games stop she's gone. She's gonna cheat on you, she's gonna
break up with you, she's gonna break your heart, whatever it
is, she's done, because ultimately she's only in this
relationship for those games. Is this making sense so far? Are you guys
enjoying this video? I want to hear from you
in the comments. Be sure to let me know. And if you would like more videos on how
to have like a good relationship and a lifelong
relationship be sure to comment "YES!" in the comments
below. Seriously guys thank you so much for commenting, letting me know what you
guys would like to see more of. This helps me so much as I'm preparing
new content for you. So also if you have any other videos you
would like to see be sure to tell me about that in the
comments as well. Reason number four the "once you stop caring she starts chasing"
concept is completely flawed is that
many women will respond to that. They they will,
but it's because of ego. I have talked to some toxic women
who have openly said "well he can't break up with me.
I have to break up with him." So yeah, she'll play the game to get you back,
again she's a drama queen, she's got tons of ego, so yeah
she'll try to get you back, she'll start chasing you,
just so she can be the one to break up with you. That is a very hurtful cycle
that sadly happens over and over again. Again this is
something toxic women do because those are the only types of women you're going
to attract if you're trying to make her chase you.
So be sure to watch this video as well on toxic women.
Seriously it's going to help you so much. It's
pretty much a good life skill to know how to identify toxic women.
But so many women who are toxic "no he can't break up with me. I have to
break up with him." And so once you stop caring and walk away she'll chase you
only until she gets you back and then she's gonna play with you and break up
with you. She will make you pay for making her
chase you. On the other side, the sincere
loving awesome woman you are looking for, you start playing those games with her
and she's done. She's gone, it's over. And our fifth
reason is honestly that it's immature. Point
blank, it just is. Even if you happen to be the almost
impossible exception where she is not toxic, it's still immature,
it's still not a good idea. If you go into a relationship
with this concept and playing these games
you are not setting your relationship up on a good foundation
at all. You are starting your relationship
on games. Which means your relationship started with you guys
messing with each other's heads. Where's the honesty in that? Where's the
integrity in that? Where's the sincerity in that?
There isn't any, right? How can there be trust in a relationship
when it starts with you messing with each other's heads?
If you want a long lasting happy relationship you've got to be mature. Now
that's it for our five reasons however there are two very important points
I need to make before we end this video. Number one: the reason the whole "make her
chase you" concept is very very attractive to a lot of men
is frankly because you've been played. Maybe you're thinking that as you watch
this video, right? You've been hurt, you've been burned, and so the thought
process is "well I'm never being burned again. I
don't want to be rejected anymore, I don't want to be embarrassed anymore, so
I'm going to make her chase me." Remember though just like I
showed you earlier with my fingers that's not how a relationship works. If
one's chasing you never come together. You have to
mutually come together. So as long as one person
is doing the chasing it's not going to work and it's not
going to lead you to that relationship. Also realize that if you've been played,
if you've been hurt, if you've been burned,
it's for two reasons. One, you are attracting the wrong types of women,
and/or two, you don't have the relationship skills you
need to get that incredible relationship. Again
this is why I created my masterclass, was just for
you. So check out the link in the description below and in the pinned
comment and you're going to learn what is
stopping you from having that ideal relationship
and how to instead move forward so you can get that
long-term crazy happy relationship. So if you're sick of being burned, if you're
sick of being rejected, if you're sick of being embarrassed and wasting your time
and money, make sure you check out that link right
now. The second thing I really need you to know
is this whole concept of "once you stop caring she starts chasing"
is not completely flawed if by stop caring you mean stop
obsessing. It is true that someone who is confident,
someone who is self-assured, and someone who is not obsessed and needy,
yeah that's very attractive and women are going to be
drawn to that. As a matter of fact if you
are needy and obsessed and all that yeah you're actually going to push
women away because it comes across as creepy and makes her uncomfortable.
So there is some truth to it if you mean don't be obsessed, don't be needy.
But if you mean act aloof and play hard to get and all that
yeah it is not remotely effective. If you have been
struggling with feeling needy and kind of
hovering and being obsessed then again my masterclass is for you as well. I
specifically put this together so you guys would have one video you
could go to just get solid answers and a solid game plan.
So make sure you click that link and join us over there.
Thank you so much again for watching my wonderful friend! If you enjoyed what you
saw be sure to give me a big thumbs up. And if you haven't yet subscribe and
ring that notification bell. And I want to hear from you in the
comments. Be sure to comment "YES!" if you would like to see more videos
just like this one and I would love to hear if you have ever
experienced any of these scenarios. Have you ever experienced
women who have played you this way? I want to know about it in the comments
below. If you have a friend who's been really struggling to get his
ideal girlfriend please share this with him. I know it
would help him so much. If we're not yet friends on social media
be sure to check out the links for that in the description below as well. Thank
you so much again my amazing friend and have an amazing
day! [blooper beep] [singing] Here we go! Is that 90s? I don't even know what that
is. Anyway, okay, here we go. I'm a little nervous about this one.
Haters are gonna hate, and they're gonna have miserable
relationships [laughter] The end. But ultimately you're always moving in an
upward... [pause] direction. I couldn't think of that word.
