Do you know what a narcissist's favorite sayings
are? By the end of this video, you're going to
know what their favorite sayings are and what they mean when they say them. Hi, I'm Rebecca Zung, top 1% attorney and
the bestselling author of the books Negotiate Like YOU M.A.T.T.E.R. and Breaking Free: A
Step-by-Step Divorce Guide, and I've helped thousands of people go from lives of drama,
trauma, chaos to step into lives of freedom, possibility, and purpose, and I do the same
thing for you right here on my channel. So make sure that you've hit that subscribe
button, you've hit that notification bell so that you can be notified every time I upload
brand new content. Now, let's talk about what a narcissist's
favorite sayings are. Remember that a narcissist likes to devalue,
likes to judge, likes to put people down, likes to make sure that everyone in the room
knows that they're better than you. What's really going on inside a narcissist
is that they actually feel smaller than everybody else. They actually have no inner sense of value. They're actually scared. That's the biggest secret of all. You are actually the stronger one. You are actually the more secure one. But they want you to think that you're not,
they want to project everything they can onto you. If you want to know more about how they devalue
and deny things, make sure you check out my video on what happens when you catch a narcissist
in a lie. Number one is, you interrupted me or you didn't
let me finish what I was saying. This is a great way for the narcissist to
deflect and to make sure that you are devalued, whatever point it is you're trying to make
you interrupted them, and so now the conversation comes back to all about them. They're no longer having a conversation about
whatever it is that you were trying to say. It's all about that you interrupted, that
you didn't let them finish, that their point was much more important than whatever it is
that you have to say, and now you're off on that tangent about that you were interrupted
or maybe it's that they didn't like the tone of how you said it or that you brought it
up then at that point. Whatever it is, they're going to come up with
some reason that the point that you're trying to make at this moment doesn't have any value
because of the way you presented it or how you presented it or when you presented it
or that you interrupted or whatever it is. It's a way of actually saying whatever you
said doesn't matter right now. The second thing is, just because I didn't. So for example, just because I didn't do what
you said when you wanted me to. This is a way of narcissistic manipulation. They're basically trying to make you feel
guilty, like, oh, just because they didn't do it exactly the way you wanted or just because
I didn't do it exactly when you wanted to. Trying to make you feel like you're the controlling
one, trying to make you feel like you're the one who has the issue, like maybe you're the
uptight one and you don't want to be uptight person. So you pull back going, "Well, I didn't mean
that you had to do it right now," or, "I didn't mean that you didn't do it good enough," or
whatever. So now you're suddenly apologizing, which
is exactly what they want, because they want to turn it back on you. They aren't the ones with the problem. It's you. You're the one with the problem. That's their projection of whatever their
issues are, have to be projected back onto you. Number three is, what about your issues? So when you try to say, "Hey, you didn't take
out the trash," or, "You didn't pick up the kids on time," or, "You said that you would
make dinner and you didn't," or whatever, some kind of thing, you didn't pay the bill
and you said you were going to pay it. When you're pointing out something to them
that they did or didn't do and then they turn around and say, "Yeah, but you also have this,"
or, "You said this before," or, "It's okay, because you've done that." So just turn it around and basically say,
"Hey, because you've done it before," or, "Because you have that issue." Let's not talk about me and my problem. Let's certainly not make me take responsibility
for anything or including my behavior, because let's talk about you and your problems. If this is all sounding super familiar to
you, give me a nailed it in the comments. The next one is, I'm sorry, what more do you
want from me? This is called a narcissistic faux apology. If you want to know more about whether a narcissist
actually apologizes or means it if they do, make sure you check out my video on does a
narcissist apologize and if they do, do they mean it, because I talk much more about the
narcissistic faux apology and what's going on when narcissists actually apologize. But a lot of times what you'll hear is I'm
sorry, I couldn't be perfect for you. I'm sorry that you feel that way. I'm sorry, it didn't go the way you wanted
to exactly. I'm sorry, I couldn't be exactly what wanted,
something like that. That's not really an apology. It's actually a manipulation, again turning
it back onto you because now you're the one who goes, "No, I didn't mean that you're not
perfect. No, I didn't mean that you..." So now here you are, again, assuaging their
ego back on them, back onto their ego. Get that focus off of whatever it is that
you want. Let's get it back on to what we need to do
to give them narcissistic supply. The next thing they say is, you made me. You made me cheat on you. You made me act irresponsibly. You made me have to move out. You made me have to lose my job. Whatever bad thing is going on that they did,
it's your fault. You did it. You made me. If you had been better, if you had been less,
if you had been more, if you had been whatever, you made it happen, it's all your fault. It's definitely all on your shoulders that
this happened, including cheating on you, including not making enough money or whatever
it is that you may be have an issue with them about. The last one that I have for you today is,
you're the only one who thinks that. So what narcissists often try to do is gaslight
you, try to make you feel bad, try to make you feel like you're the only one who thinks
that way, because the whole neighborhood thinks that I'm amazing, because they've lined up
their flying monkeys and especially covert narcissists are really, really good at this. If you haven't checked out my videos on covert
narcissists, now's a great time to do that. What they're really trying to do is make you
think that you are nuts, that you're the only one that feels this way about this person. You're the only one who thinks this way about
a certain thing that they're trying to convince you of. So therefore you're the weird one, you're
the odd ball. So you go, "Well, I don't want to be weird. I don't want to be odd. I don't want to be the odd man out." I guess I'll go along since everybody else
thinks whatever the narcissist is trying to convince you of. So that's what's going on with that. So if you are getting ready to negotiate with
a narcissist, then you will definitely want to grab my free crush my negotiation prep
worksheet. It's basically an ebook. It's 15 pages and it's totally free and you
don't want to negotiate without it. You can get it a the link below or just simply
go to winmynegotiation.com. If you are dealing with a narcissist and you
want to connect with lots of other people who are dealing with exactly what you're dealing
with, you want have support, you want to have somebody that you can vent to and get some
feedback from other people who are experiencing what you're experiencing, come on over and
join me in my free private Facebook group. It's called Narcissists Negotiators with Rebecca
Zung and I will drop a link to that below as well. If you like this video, give me a like, give
me a share, drop me a comment, let me know that you were here. If you haven't subscribed yet, now's a good
time to do that. Hit subscribe, hit that notification bell. I'm Rebecca Zung. I am so glad that you stopped by my channel. Remember that today is a great day to start
negotiating your best life. I'll see you in the next video.